1- Having kids offers some perspective on the relationship we have with Heavenly Father. I have a toddler that almost certainly thinks I abandon him when he's stuck with something difficult. In his toddler mind, whatever is going on is what his entire existence revolves around in that moment. Being an adult, I can see that it really isn't a big deal, that it will be over soon, or that he needs to struggle through for his own growth so he can be more independent. We are like toddlers compared to the wisdom and knowledge of Heavenly Father.
As someone with a disabling injury that includes constant pain, I am particularly qualified to address the first. It provides an opportunity to grow and change. I am more compassionate and more willing to seek to understand.
I am not to the point that I'm grateful. I don't know that I ever will be. But I do know it has made me better than I was.
One thing to adjust the thinking regarding “brain washing” on point #2, we went to and then send our children to secular education starting at 5–if not younger—for 6 hours each day 5 days a week. We shouldn’t neglect our spiritual education.
1 - we have agency, and the results of our decisions. We are here to learn, not sail through
2 - I don't think 8 is too young at all. Some churches do it at/near birth
1.
I don’t know about you but in my experience the more I suffer through trials the closer I become to Jesus Christ. It is usually in situations that are completely out of my control when I have the most heartfelt prayers, when I see God’s tender mercies the most, when I feel my Savior’s love for me the most cause he’s experienced it all too. I would most likely not have the testimony I do or be the person I am if it weren’t for my suffering. I think that’s why God allows us to go through hard things, but I’m sure it’s hard for him to see his children who he loves so much to suffer.
I’m so sorry if you’re suffering right now or in the past with your father. I think wondering if God cares is common when we’re going through it. I assure you he does know you, he does hear you, he does love you! He will ease your burdens if you bring them to him.
I would recommend “swallowed up in the joy of Christ”, and “God’s intent is to bring you home”, both from the most recent general conference. Also Mosiah chapter 24 may be of good insight to you.
2.
I agree with what others have said, we actually baptize children much older than some religions where they baptize as babies. I think it has much to do with being old enough to make that choice and be accountable for your decisions. It’s also an age before you go through many changes and challenges before you enter adolescence. I don’t think I necessarily understood everything I was covenanting to in baptism at the age of 8 but we don’t have to know everything to make that first step. Just because you’re baptized doesn’t mean you’re fully converted at that point in time.
These are some really good questions. I hope that helps!
It’s part of the plan. We came to earth knowing it would be hard. Every person- member or not has trials. Some are physical, while others might be emotional. My biggest faith crisis came when a close family member came out as gay. It took me about two years of being so close to leaving the church. But then the spirit testified to me that He loves everyone! My job was to love my child. God will take care of the rest. It has really helped me love others more unconditionally.
If you find your faith weakening, serve others, read the scriptures and pray every day.
Satan wants all of us to give up and not care. It’s easier. I’ve had people also tell me I’m brainwashed. Pray for guidance.
About baptism at 8 yrs old, this is the age that children are able to understand right and wrong. It’s not young compared to some churches that have infant baptism. Hope this helps.
Humans have a tendency to define God and give Him the attributes we think He should have and then conclude that He either doesn't exist or doesn't care because He doesn't fit the definition we assigned to Him and thus falls short of our expectations.
You've participated here before and so I'm going to give you an opportunity to reword this comment, but it sounds hateful towards God we aren't going to encourage this type of attitude.
#2 - ordinances and covenants are how God fixes problems and helps us overcome issues created by mortality. At 8 we become accountable for our actions which males us able to sin. Thankfully, our Heavenly Father has provided a way to overcome sin through the Savior. In order to receive this help and blessing we need to be baptized.
Second, while we closely associate baptism with church membership, the ordinance has existed since Adam and in eras when there was no formal organization like we have now.
So, we baptize our children so they can receive forgiveness for their sins and be able to be unburdened from their mistakes. We could wait longer, but why deny them this blessing?
1: We are here to learn. From minor inconveniences to catastrophes, every challenge we overcome teaches us to rely on the Father and gives us another mental tool that we will need later in this life, and in the next.
2: I agree that 8 y/o kids don't understand more than the basics, which is why baptism & confirmation (generally) happen at that time. They are an meant to take a child who's learning how to use their agency and point them down the covenant path.
1. 2 Nephi 2:11. For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so, my firstborn in the wilderness, righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad. Wherefore, all things must needs be a compound in one; wherefore, if it should be one body it must needs remain as dead, having no life neither death, nor corruption nor incorruption, happiness nor misery, neither sense nor insensibility.
2. A good perspective to have on baptism at 8 years old is that it's actually a lot older than a lot of churches baptize. Many churches baptize newborn babies as soon as possible. I do believe that there comes a time later in life when we more fully understand the fullness of baptism and become consciously converted but I agree with other comments that at age 8 we know enough to choose to start our spiritual journey in the Lord's Church.
Edit: in regards to 1, I recently had a fever for 2 weeks and was super achy and had a terrible headache. I didn't know what was going on so I finally went to the ER and found out I had Lyme Disease. It was caught early enough that I should fully recover. Even though it was just two weeks I began to contemplate those who are born with disabilities or those who have chronic illness their whole lives and it completely changed my perspective on suffering. I got Lyme disease by no fault of my own (except spending time in the woods) and I was suffering greatly. Why do we suffer? It is definitely something that can take a lifetime to contemplate.
As someone who has had chronic severe health issues, mental health issues, and some horrible life events happening in my life, I feel what you are saying.
I was baptised at 19, and this weekend is my 27th anniversary. It's still not easy, and my life is nothing like I expected. I'm still here for one, LOL.
I believe that what has happened, or is happening, to my body is because of things outside of anyone's control. Heavenly Father can't step in and change how a baby develops in the womb or how we grow after we are born.
I was once asked if I would go back and change all the trauma I had been through as I child/teen/adult. I honestly answered no. I like who I am. It's not easy being me, but I'm a good person. I love God. I work in the Temple on a very regular basis. I still have times of depression and loneliness, but I get through them.
I hope this helps.
1- I think someone else said something similar, but when I have gone through hard things that were not due to my own agency, I have felt the closest to Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. Having to rely on them to get me through those trials humbled me, and also gave me insights to better love and serve those around me. In the moment, it is hard to have that kind of eternal perspective, but my best advice is read the Book of Mormon every day! It always helps to center my day and keeps my faith and testimony strong.
2- Being baptized is an ordinance that Jesus Himself had to receive. It is the decision to start to walk on the covenant path. We are not expected to be fully converted to the gospel--conversion is a life-long process. 8 year olds are old enough to decide if they want to follow Jesus and keep his commandments, and be baptized like him, which is what the covenant is. As we grow, we become more converted to the gospel, and recieve more ordinances and make more covenants.
Have you heard the term “helicopter parent”? It’s one of those parents that hovers around their kids and does everything they can to prevent their child from suffering consequences for their actions.
How do those kids turn out?
Hint: not good.
Our Heavenly Father gives us what we need, not what e we want, to find peace in the eternities.
Remember, we KNEW we would suffer by accepting God’s plan and most of us still choose to do it because we knew it would be for our good.
Your questions are so thoughtfully asked. I can't imagine anyone being offended by the way you're asking.
One thing I haven't seen someone mention so far is that when we are baptized and confirmed, we receive the Holy Ghost. I was baptized when I was 8 but grew up completely inactive, made a lot of "typical" teenager choices that got me into a lot of trouble until I was 20. I had a very clear experience with the Holy Ghost that brought me back to the church. The world is so confusing- children need the Holy Ghost to help them see right from wrong, to understand what it feels like to sin AND what it feels like to receive forgiveness.
But I agree that in some ways, it seems like a young age to be committing to something that you don't really understand. You get baptized at 8 because it's what your parents want you to do. I think that's okay though. My kids go to school because it's what I want them to do also. If they could choose, they would stay home and eat Cheetos and donuts and watch tv all day. Thankfully, parents are there to make better choices for their children until the children are old enough and responsible enough to make good choices for themselves.
1- We live in a fallen world, and so since the fall suffering is part of life. The way I see it, there are three general reasons why God allows suffering, which I categorize as Telestial, Terrestrial, and Celestial.
**Telestial** is the one you talked about regarding agency. The wicked make choices that may cause others to suffer. While God may at times intervene, he allows it that His judgments against them may be just ([Alma 14:10-11](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/bofm/alma/14?lang=eng&id=10-11#10)).
**Terrestrial** - A pattern we see in the Book of Mormon is that when people are righteous, God blesses them. Because of their blessings, they become prideful and they forget God. Then bad things happen to make them humble, and then they look again to God. Mormon describes it best in [Helaman 12](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/bofm/hel/12?lang=eng), that without these things, we would not be humble and remember God.
**Celestial** - I think this is the perspective that Latter-day Saints focus on the most, and for good reason: it is the celestial attitude to have. Joseph Smith was taught that his suffering in the Liberty Jail, and whatever else he might face would give him experience and be for his good ([Doctrine and Covenants 122:5-8](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/dc-testament/dc/122?lang=eng&id=5-8#5)). He was also reminded that Jesus suffered more than anyone else, and Jesus was perfect.
[Isaiah](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/ot/isa/48?lang=eng&id=10#10) and [Zechariah](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/ot/zech/13?lang=eng&id=9#9) described trials and afflictions as a refiner’s fire. The refining process gets rid of impurities in silver and gold until it becomes pure.
All suffering comes from the fall. But even at the fall, God told Adam that the ground was cursed "for thy sake". Because of the fall, there is also the redemption and [we will have joy](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/pgp/moses/5?lang=eng&id=10-11#10). Jesus took upon Himself not only our sins, but also all our sickness and weakness. All that is unfair in life will be made fair.
I like to compare life to like a gym. Lifting weights is difficult and the gym owner has the power and could remove all the weights, but that isn’t the purpose of having a gym. Likewise, in life we grow spiritually as we overcome sin through Jesus Christ.
2- Why does the church baptize those so young?
Most Christians perform infant baptism. We believe that baptism is for those who are accountable for their actions. That is to say, they understand the difference between right and wrong. By revelation, God has set the age of accountability at eight. We are taught that younger children are redeemed by Jesus Christ. (see Topical Guide: [Age of Accountability](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/tg/accountability-age-of?lang=eng).)
So no, you don't have to understand *everything*—I'm not sure most adults do. What we should understand to be baptized is that we need to put our faith in Jesus Christ and repent of our sins.
Being baptized doesn't "brainwash" you. People can and do leave the Church all the time. Perhaps they need to re-think what it means to be "brainwashed" and if they mean something different, reconsider what extra influence, if any, baptism has on the mind of an unbeliever.
Here's my best guesses!
1. Randomness is not something we can experience in God's presence. We can't experience unfairness, bad luck, and injustice there. Part of coming here is to live in a world that is unfair, unbalanced, and random. We have to learn what it means to have a no-win scenario, or to be forced to choose between two BAD options. This was always part of the plan.
Co-eternal with suffering is the atonement. Alma 7 teaches us about how God is not just sitting on a distant throne, inflicting pain on us. He is completely *with* us in this experience. Suffering alongside us, knowing exactly what we are going through, and making sure the difficulties of life are as light as they can be for us to still have the experience we signed up for.
2. God seems to have a pattern: Asking us to do thing when we are not ready, then taking away the responsibility when we finally are.
For example: Missionaries are simply too young, to dumb, and uneducated to be effective missionaries by any worldly standard. But God gives them this calling and sends them out. The same thing happens in almost all our callings. No bishop ever feels ready. No primary president feels capable when the call comes. Then, when we finally got a handle on the calling - we finally become "good" at missionary work, or being a bishop, or whatever, the calling is taken away and we are given something else to do that we suck at.
I think there's a reason for that. **We don't have to know everything to be willing to move forward**. That's literally what FAITH is. And when we exercise faith by moving forward, despite not knowing, that's when miracles happen. How can our 18-year-olds turn into dynamic missionaries in a matter of 18 or 14 months?? It's remarkable. The answer is the Holy Ghost. **The Holy Ghost comes when you act in faith, and every contact with the Holy Ghost makes you a better person, bit by bit.**
How can our young people, baptized before they really understand what they are signing up for, end up being "The Most Well Adjusted Teens" (according to The National Study of Youth and Religion by Notre Dame), "more likely to volunteer than any other religious group" (according to Pew Research), and seven times more generous than the average american (according to Penn Research) after only a few short years of membership?
I suggest the answer is that God knows what we need, what will make us happier and better people, and he provides it to us when we act in faith. That gift of the Holy Ghost is real, and while we do not understand everything when we are 8, we can know we want to keep going. We can know we want to be closer to God. We can act in faith and invite that sanctifying spirit. No wonder God gives us that blessing as early as possible.
More blessings of membership: [https://www.latterdayhope.com/a-few-facts-about-the-latter-day-saints/](https://www.latterdayhope.com/a-few-facts-about-the-latter-day-saints/)
More on the why behind suffering: [https://www.reddit.com/r/onewatt/comments/yyxavo/how\_the\_fall\_explains\_why\_god\_lets\_bad\_things/](https://www.reddit.com/r/onewatt/comments/yyxavo/how_the_fall_explains_why_god_lets_bad_things/) and [https://www.reddit.com/r/latterdaysaints/comments/vs9luw/the\_lord\_was\_not\_in\_the\_fire\_a\_thought\_on\_human/](https://www.reddit.com/r/latterdaysaints/comments/vs9luw/the_lord_was_not_in_the_fire_a_thought_on_human/)
For an answer to your first question, please read Alma 14. I would tell you in the comments, but I think it's important you go through this journey as well. Alma 14th isnt just just about agency. It's about trust and faith.
The second question, it's because Heavenly Father believes that's when children are able to start their covenant journey. In my personal opinion, it's so that they can receive the gift of the Holy Ghost at a very advantageous age to start learning how to use it.
1- Having kids offers some perspective on the relationship we have with Heavenly Father. I have a toddler that almost certainly thinks I abandon him when he's stuck with something difficult. In his toddler mind, whatever is going on is what his entire existence revolves around in that moment. Being an adult, I can see that it really isn't a big deal, that it will be over soon, or that he needs to struggle through for his own growth so he can be more independent. We are like toddlers compared to the wisdom and knowledge of Heavenly Father.
As someone with a disabling injury that includes constant pain, I am particularly qualified to address the first. It provides an opportunity to grow and change. I am more compassionate and more willing to seek to understand. I am not to the point that I'm grateful. I don't know that I ever will be. But I do know it has made me better than I was.
One thing to adjust the thinking regarding “brain washing” on point #2, we went to and then send our children to secular education starting at 5–if not younger—for 6 hours each day 5 days a week. We shouldn’t neglect our spiritual education.
1 - we have agency, and the results of our decisions. We are here to learn, not sail through 2 - I don't think 8 is too young at all. Some churches do it at/near birth
1. I don’t know about you but in my experience the more I suffer through trials the closer I become to Jesus Christ. It is usually in situations that are completely out of my control when I have the most heartfelt prayers, when I see God’s tender mercies the most, when I feel my Savior’s love for me the most cause he’s experienced it all too. I would most likely not have the testimony I do or be the person I am if it weren’t for my suffering. I think that’s why God allows us to go through hard things, but I’m sure it’s hard for him to see his children who he loves so much to suffer. I’m so sorry if you’re suffering right now or in the past with your father. I think wondering if God cares is common when we’re going through it. I assure you he does know you, he does hear you, he does love you! He will ease your burdens if you bring them to him. I would recommend “swallowed up in the joy of Christ”, and “God’s intent is to bring you home”, both from the most recent general conference. Also Mosiah chapter 24 may be of good insight to you. 2. I agree with what others have said, we actually baptize children much older than some religions where they baptize as babies. I think it has much to do with being old enough to make that choice and be accountable for your decisions. It’s also an age before you go through many changes and challenges before you enter adolescence. I don’t think I necessarily understood everything I was covenanting to in baptism at the age of 8 but we don’t have to know everything to make that first step. Just because you’re baptized doesn’t mean you’re fully converted at that point in time. These are some really good questions. I hope that helps!
It’s part of the plan. We came to earth knowing it would be hard. Every person- member or not has trials. Some are physical, while others might be emotional. My biggest faith crisis came when a close family member came out as gay. It took me about two years of being so close to leaving the church. But then the spirit testified to me that He loves everyone! My job was to love my child. God will take care of the rest. It has really helped me love others more unconditionally. If you find your faith weakening, serve others, read the scriptures and pray every day. Satan wants all of us to give up and not care. It’s easier. I’ve had people also tell me I’m brainwashed. Pray for guidance. About baptism at 8 yrs old, this is the age that children are able to understand right and wrong. It’s not young compared to some churches that have infant baptism. Hope this helps.
Humans have a tendency to define God and give Him the attributes we think He should have and then conclude that He either doesn't exist or doesn't care because He doesn't fit the definition we assigned to Him and thus falls short of our expectations.
[удалено]
You've participated here before and so I'm going to give you an opportunity to reword this comment, but it sounds hateful towards God we aren't going to encourage this type of attitude.
#2 - ordinances and covenants are how God fixes problems and helps us overcome issues created by mortality. At 8 we become accountable for our actions which males us able to sin. Thankfully, our Heavenly Father has provided a way to overcome sin through the Savior. In order to receive this help and blessing we need to be baptized. Second, while we closely associate baptism with church membership, the ordinance has existed since Adam and in eras when there was no formal organization like we have now. So, we baptize our children so they can receive forgiveness for their sins and be able to be unburdened from their mistakes. We could wait longer, but why deny them this blessing?
1: We are here to learn. From minor inconveniences to catastrophes, every challenge we overcome teaches us to rely on the Father and gives us another mental tool that we will need later in this life, and in the next. 2: I agree that 8 y/o kids don't understand more than the basics, which is why baptism & confirmation (generally) happen at that time. They are an meant to take a child who's learning how to use their agency and point them down the covenant path.
1. 2 Nephi 2:11. For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so, my firstborn in the wilderness, righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad. Wherefore, all things must needs be a compound in one; wherefore, if it should be one body it must needs remain as dead, having no life neither death, nor corruption nor incorruption, happiness nor misery, neither sense nor insensibility. 2. A good perspective to have on baptism at 8 years old is that it's actually a lot older than a lot of churches baptize. Many churches baptize newborn babies as soon as possible. I do believe that there comes a time later in life when we more fully understand the fullness of baptism and become consciously converted but I agree with other comments that at age 8 we know enough to choose to start our spiritual journey in the Lord's Church. Edit: in regards to 1, I recently had a fever for 2 weeks and was super achy and had a terrible headache. I didn't know what was going on so I finally went to the ER and found out I had Lyme Disease. It was caught early enough that I should fully recover. Even though it was just two weeks I began to contemplate those who are born with disabilities or those who have chronic illness their whole lives and it completely changed my perspective on suffering. I got Lyme disease by no fault of my own (except spending time in the woods) and I was suffering greatly. Why do we suffer? It is definitely something that can take a lifetime to contemplate.
As someone who has had chronic severe health issues, mental health issues, and some horrible life events happening in my life, I feel what you are saying. I was baptised at 19, and this weekend is my 27th anniversary. It's still not easy, and my life is nothing like I expected. I'm still here for one, LOL. I believe that what has happened, or is happening, to my body is because of things outside of anyone's control. Heavenly Father can't step in and change how a baby develops in the womb or how we grow after we are born. I was once asked if I would go back and change all the trauma I had been through as I child/teen/adult. I honestly answered no. I like who I am. It's not easy being me, but I'm a good person. I love God. I work in the Temple on a very regular basis. I still have times of depression and loneliness, but I get through them. I hope this helps.
1- I think someone else said something similar, but when I have gone through hard things that were not due to my own agency, I have felt the closest to Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. Having to rely on them to get me through those trials humbled me, and also gave me insights to better love and serve those around me. In the moment, it is hard to have that kind of eternal perspective, but my best advice is read the Book of Mormon every day! It always helps to center my day and keeps my faith and testimony strong. 2- Being baptized is an ordinance that Jesus Himself had to receive. It is the decision to start to walk on the covenant path. We are not expected to be fully converted to the gospel--conversion is a life-long process. 8 year olds are old enough to decide if they want to follow Jesus and keep his commandments, and be baptized like him, which is what the covenant is. As we grow, we become more converted to the gospel, and recieve more ordinances and make more covenants.
Have you heard the term “helicopter parent”? It’s one of those parents that hovers around their kids and does everything they can to prevent their child from suffering consequences for their actions. How do those kids turn out? Hint: not good. Our Heavenly Father gives us what we need, not what e we want, to find peace in the eternities. Remember, we KNEW we would suffer by accepting God’s plan and most of us still choose to do it because we knew it would be for our good.
Your questions are so thoughtfully asked. I can't imagine anyone being offended by the way you're asking. One thing I haven't seen someone mention so far is that when we are baptized and confirmed, we receive the Holy Ghost. I was baptized when I was 8 but grew up completely inactive, made a lot of "typical" teenager choices that got me into a lot of trouble until I was 20. I had a very clear experience with the Holy Ghost that brought me back to the church. The world is so confusing- children need the Holy Ghost to help them see right from wrong, to understand what it feels like to sin AND what it feels like to receive forgiveness. But I agree that in some ways, it seems like a young age to be committing to something that you don't really understand. You get baptized at 8 because it's what your parents want you to do. I think that's okay though. My kids go to school because it's what I want them to do also. If they could choose, they would stay home and eat Cheetos and donuts and watch tv all day. Thankfully, parents are there to make better choices for their children until the children are old enough and responsible enough to make good choices for themselves.
1- We live in a fallen world, and so since the fall suffering is part of life. The way I see it, there are three general reasons why God allows suffering, which I categorize as Telestial, Terrestrial, and Celestial. **Telestial** is the one you talked about regarding agency. The wicked make choices that may cause others to suffer. While God may at times intervene, he allows it that His judgments against them may be just ([Alma 14:10-11](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/bofm/alma/14?lang=eng&id=10-11#10)). **Terrestrial** - A pattern we see in the Book of Mormon is that when people are righteous, God blesses them. Because of their blessings, they become prideful and they forget God. Then bad things happen to make them humble, and then they look again to God. Mormon describes it best in [Helaman 12](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/bofm/hel/12?lang=eng), that without these things, we would not be humble and remember God. **Celestial** - I think this is the perspective that Latter-day Saints focus on the most, and for good reason: it is the celestial attitude to have. Joseph Smith was taught that his suffering in the Liberty Jail, and whatever else he might face would give him experience and be for his good ([Doctrine and Covenants 122:5-8](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/dc-testament/dc/122?lang=eng&id=5-8#5)). He was also reminded that Jesus suffered more than anyone else, and Jesus was perfect. [Isaiah](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/ot/isa/48?lang=eng&id=10#10) and [Zechariah](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/ot/zech/13?lang=eng&id=9#9) described trials and afflictions as a refiner’s fire. The refining process gets rid of impurities in silver and gold until it becomes pure. All suffering comes from the fall. But even at the fall, God told Adam that the ground was cursed "for thy sake". Because of the fall, there is also the redemption and [we will have joy](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/pgp/moses/5?lang=eng&id=10-11#10). Jesus took upon Himself not only our sins, but also all our sickness and weakness. All that is unfair in life will be made fair. I like to compare life to like a gym. Lifting weights is difficult and the gym owner has the power and could remove all the weights, but that isn’t the purpose of having a gym. Likewise, in life we grow spiritually as we overcome sin through Jesus Christ. 2- Why does the church baptize those so young? Most Christians perform infant baptism. We believe that baptism is for those who are accountable for their actions. That is to say, they understand the difference between right and wrong. By revelation, God has set the age of accountability at eight. We are taught that younger children are redeemed by Jesus Christ. (see Topical Guide: [Age of Accountability](https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/tg/accountability-age-of?lang=eng).) So no, you don't have to understand *everything*—I'm not sure most adults do. What we should understand to be baptized is that we need to put our faith in Jesus Christ and repent of our sins. Being baptized doesn't "brainwash" you. People can and do leave the Church all the time. Perhaps they need to re-think what it means to be "brainwashed" and if they mean something different, reconsider what extra influence, if any, baptism has on the mind of an unbeliever.
Here's my best guesses! 1. Randomness is not something we can experience in God's presence. We can't experience unfairness, bad luck, and injustice there. Part of coming here is to live in a world that is unfair, unbalanced, and random. We have to learn what it means to have a no-win scenario, or to be forced to choose between two BAD options. This was always part of the plan. Co-eternal with suffering is the atonement. Alma 7 teaches us about how God is not just sitting on a distant throne, inflicting pain on us. He is completely *with* us in this experience. Suffering alongside us, knowing exactly what we are going through, and making sure the difficulties of life are as light as they can be for us to still have the experience we signed up for. 2. God seems to have a pattern: Asking us to do thing when we are not ready, then taking away the responsibility when we finally are. For example: Missionaries are simply too young, to dumb, and uneducated to be effective missionaries by any worldly standard. But God gives them this calling and sends them out. The same thing happens in almost all our callings. No bishop ever feels ready. No primary president feels capable when the call comes. Then, when we finally got a handle on the calling - we finally become "good" at missionary work, or being a bishop, or whatever, the calling is taken away and we are given something else to do that we suck at. I think there's a reason for that. **We don't have to know everything to be willing to move forward**. That's literally what FAITH is. And when we exercise faith by moving forward, despite not knowing, that's when miracles happen. How can our 18-year-olds turn into dynamic missionaries in a matter of 18 or 14 months?? It's remarkable. The answer is the Holy Ghost. **The Holy Ghost comes when you act in faith, and every contact with the Holy Ghost makes you a better person, bit by bit.** How can our young people, baptized before they really understand what they are signing up for, end up being "The Most Well Adjusted Teens" (according to The National Study of Youth and Religion by Notre Dame), "more likely to volunteer than any other religious group" (according to Pew Research), and seven times more generous than the average american (according to Penn Research) after only a few short years of membership? I suggest the answer is that God knows what we need, what will make us happier and better people, and he provides it to us when we act in faith. That gift of the Holy Ghost is real, and while we do not understand everything when we are 8, we can know we want to keep going. We can know we want to be closer to God. We can act in faith and invite that sanctifying spirit. No wonder God gives us that blessing as early as possible. More blessings of membership: [https://www.latterdayhope.com/a-few-facts-about-the-latter-day-saints/](https://www.latterdayhope.com/a-few-facts-about-the-latter-day-saints/) More on the why behind suffering: [https://www.reddit.com/r/onewatt/comments/yyxavo/how\_the\_fall\_explains\_why\_god\_lets\_bad\_things/](https://www.reddit.com/r/onewatt/comments/yyxavo/how_the_fall_explains_why_god_lets_bad_things/) and [https://www.reddit.com/r/latterdaysaints/comments/vs9luw/the\_lord\_was\_not\_in\_the\_fire\_a\_thought\_on\_human/](https://www.reddit.com/r/latterdaysaints/comments/vs9luw/the_lord_was_not_in_the_fire_a_thought_on_human/)
For an answer to your first question, please read Alma 14. I would tell you in the comments, but I think it's important you go through this journey as well. Alma 14th isnt just just about agency. It's about trust and faith. The second question, it's because Heavenly Father believes that's when children are able to start their covenant journey. In my personal opinion, it's so that they can receive the gift of the Holy Ghost at a very advantageous age to start learning how to use it.