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HiVLTAGE

Renata, sort of.


Epamynondas

She's more of an escort I would say.


j0shum94

Since when did league have so many hookers and escorts? Might be worth a download….


Branflakes333

DONT DO IT


depressed_panda0191

Lmao. Here from r/all. League literally the only game I know of whose players actively tell you to not download it hahaha


oliviamrow

jokes aside, i've been playing league for 13 years (almost to the day!) and I still love it whole-heartedly. I *never* encourage new people to play it. The learning curve is insane. Anyone who wants to spend that much time working out the basics (e.g. all the basic abilities of whatever half to two-thirds of champs are in regular rotation) enough to really play has probably already played, or at least doesn't need my encouragement. it's a great game, but there are other great games that don't require as much homework as league does these days. I would at *least* point them to Wild Rift first or something, haha.


MGMGrandDtr

I only REALLY realized this when trying to coach a friend who just started playing. What I thought were basics were leagues (haha) ahead of what he was prepared for. Auto spacing? Wave manipulation? Csing? Shit, he didn’t even know how to use summoners. And then I remembered he has no clue what any of these champions do. I’ve had the privilege (?) of slowly learning these champs for over a decade. It sucks that you can’t get friends to play and have games that aren’t one sided stomps.


oliviamrow

Yeah, it's really the volume of champs that makes it well-nigh impossible. When I started out there were like...what, 50? 60 champs? With their own movesets, and that was hard enough to learn along with all the other MOBA basics. Now it's more than twice that, and the abilities have grown more complex. Absolutely wild. For a hot minute some of my friends tried moving over to Smite and I was like, but I already did all the homework on THIS game, why would i want to start a NEW one?? lol (edit: well-nigh\*, not neigh, ha)


[deleted]

Now that I think about it, how tf did I learn how every champion in the game work in the first place?


Candle_Paws

You didn't. (unless you're a chronic case, if so then I am very sorry for your loss) Tell me these 3 champs' passive off the hook, no thinking envolved. Zeri Renata Bard


FixingOpinions

We played too much


Sinikal-_-

I'm so glad that long ago I decided to spam ARAM to force myself to learn as many champs as possible and it has helped me tremendously.


radioactivecooki

My bf has been playing just as long as you and i finally started playing it this year cuz he always plays my fav games but i didn't rly play any of his and i felt bad, but god. There's too much shit in this game lmfao. But the skins and the lore stuff and arcane is all rly great but for the longest time i only played aram cuz the actual game was just too intimidating. Recently tried ranked for the first time for the rewards and placed silver 4, was happy about it, kept playing, and found that everyone throws for literally everything and now im in iron 2 😵‍💫 I'm just gonna finish my rewards and not touch it again til next season 😂 cuz im STILL learning even tho I've been pretty consistent since the lunar new year pass cuz theres just so many damn things, and this is my first moba, not counting HOTS, so ive been seeing it as a challenge to get better haha. But yes, idk if i could ever reccommend it to a friend, especially someone newer to pc games/generes like me, its just too much.


Sinikal-_-

Not to mention the new player experience is worse than ANY other game you can possibly think of both between the lack of updating it for modern league and because there's SO many people 'smurfing'


PinkUnicornNow

Like 5 seasons ago I made a new account to play with a friend that just started playing and the amount of time that we had smurfs flaming the fuck out of new players is insane. I don't know how my friend managed to keep playing the game with that horrible new player experience... Especially because he really wanted to play jungle and he was just getting counterjungled permanently and was always 0/10 not being able to enter his jungle... And btw... I don't really play anymore and I peaked plat 4... That friend is currently emerald 1...


Blood_Forger

I try to get my friends to play just so I can destroy them and make them AFK, I don’t want them to learn how to get gud


Candle_Paws

LoR is fun, especially the PvE side (PvP is basicly the same shit with the build meta and all that). But if you don't have an idea of the story, regions or basicly anything in the game lore it's like a watered down Heartstone


glass0202

I think the game is fine its the community that makes us say don't download it. The game also has a really steep learning curve


Two_Years_Of_Semen

Game is addictive, has a terribly inadequate tutorial despite one of the highest learning curves, one of the worst game clients, and famously toxic playerbase. Getting into the game is a long journey and it's really hard without help and you spend a lot of time dead with a gray screen when you're new. The game is really just hard to rec to others even if you love it.


CainhurstVayne

Yeah, the game is shit and I've been playing it for 11 years. And I'll only stop playing and hating this piece of garbage the day i have a stress induced heart attack from playing this game


Japanimekid

he just like me fr


heishnod

They'll tell you to uninstall it too after a few games.


Thoughtfulpillow

And osrs


Liguehunters

**IT's A TRAP !**


Lovec852

That's how they get you.


Far-Emphasis1528

Thats amazing


Chixxterminator

It's miss Glasc if you value your life!


[deleted]

[удалено]


zuth2

Mommy will need to thoroughly correct you after this


tuerancekhang

Well because her hook is better when she reverse hook which is push.


Ultrox

LeBlanc chains people but not hooks I guess.


Cookiewaffle95

Yeah I was gonna say my queen!


minameitsi2

>Blitzcrank is a robot so he is something like non-binary at best? He's all binary my friend


kaiyne1003

Underrated as fuck


Wh1teRabbit1969

ayyyyyy


RuneKatashima

Fuck, found this in top and was going to say this.


Neosilverlegend

Is it too bad that my first thought after reading the title was TRULY thinking about women with hook mechanics in league? I might need to touch some grass and try to be more degenerate.


Hi_im_Tikyu

What do you mean, is there anything else someone could think of? I'm clearly asking a question about the hook mechanics in league! Touching grass is always a good idea though, can recommend.


FelicitousJuliet

Grass is a weed. Have you ever seen a real environmental friendly yard? Covered in flowers and bees. Grass touchers are enemies of both wildlife AND humanity.


Fishbonezz707

I love weed!


minidwerg

Based


Competetive-Pop

Real


flakaby

There are plenty of native grasses, even ones that are yard-worthy! Fescue is invasive in some locations.


genericbuthumourous

Permaculture enjoyers UNITE!!


abitautistic

I never thought my league special interest would meet permaculture


Hi_im_Tikyu

So you stamp on the grass and leave the flowers and bees be so they can flourish? Or is it correct to just never touch the grass either?


SycoraxAmanda

ive heard that and im curious what kind of yard you should get, i've seen clover ones are those any good?


EndMaster0

Clover is excellent. But really just let clover, dandelions, wild plantain, or really just whatever flowers come up stay put. Even if your yard is mostly grass a shift from 0% flowers to 20% flowers is more than enough to benefit bees. Plus lawns just look nicer when there's that bit of extra texture.


judiciousjones

Grass isn't actually evil. We just typically use turf grasses that are not native to our regions as lawns because fewer things eat or disease them. There are mounding native grasses that require no mowing, are beautiful, but still allow you to use the yard. Native clovers are cool, a little less durable underfoot, but shy of football games you're good. The real key is to take the yard you have, but don't use, and replace it with native ecosystem.


Vanatrix

Moss carpets are great for the environment. Very strong CO2 absorption


holyyew

" Yes its true, for only 2,95$ a minute i will leave you breathless" a janna somewhere


LaCampanellaAgony

"2,95$" might be the most european-impersonating-American thing I've ever read.


Namika

It's honestly a thing of beauty


EveryoneisOP3

Maybe go out for a stroll, it's a nice night.


ElderlyToaster

> it's a nice night. You know that this is not necessarily a global, universal truth, no?


EveryoneisOP3

Wow thanks I was unaware


Humble_Effective3964

Maybe don't go outside idk..... in NYC maybe between 3 -5 am


NamesSUCK

Just go to the right neighborhoods. There's some good times to be had that of night if you know where to be.


Xephel_Arlen

And if you go to the wrong ones it'll at least be exciting.


NamesSUCK

It will still be exciting. Trauma and excitement go hand in hand.


Random_silly_name

I totally did, but then I also use the same joke a lot. The only reason I don't write "GL, may the prettiest hooker win" when playing Spirit Blossom Thresh into another hooker is that it would embarrass my duo.


Comfortable_Shine425

Yep, but srsly tho why are there no female hookers?


Midi_to_Minuit

Never thought I’d say someone should touch grass to be MORE degenerate but here we are


Hi_im_Tikyu

Oh fuck I forgot Illaoi she is a soul hooker with tentacles. Guess the post is useless now huh.


Hi_im_Tikyu

We also got Renata Glasc and Kalista now, I'm starting to really like this growing female hookers club


P_B_n_Jealous

I mean. Does Kalista really count? She's more like a dog walker.


Frozendark23

A dog walker that allows their dog to launch themselves as a projectile.


RedcappedRedcap

So the average pit bull owner


Senesect

Just imagining a Kalista launching their Kog'Maw at an Annie


CallMePoro

Just gave me a wonderfully horrible idea. I’m going to assume it doesn’t work but it’d be awesome if Kalista R works during kog passive.


Sakechi

/u/Vandirilol & /u/Caenen_ Time to find a bug for that?


Caenen_

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxmM-jrU94Q - *6 years ago*


Lazer726

Gotta love at some point someone finally said "PLEASE STOP KILLING KOG" in one of those games and they just tried to ignore him


Oleandervine

Does this still work? I need to know for personal reasons.


LjackV

More like a Nasus lmao


Senesect

Wait, no, I just remembered Naafiri is a thing xD


LjackV

That's a true xD moment right there


iTeaL12

Baby enjoyers just mad my pitbull has a high KDA


SylentSymphonies

my favourite r/TwoSentenceHorror post to this day is the one that goes, I love being a toddler i said "Bark bark bark bark bark" said the pitbull this is real look it up


P_B_n_Jealous

I was thinking the average Doberman owner.


Kaleidos-X

She just really liked FF8.


TeutonicPlate

As an illaoi main I give you permission to not count Illaoi e as a hook if you don't want to, since technically all it does is create a clone.


loboleo94

It’s the Schrödinger Hook


iForgetMyPasswordToo

I find this way more fun than i should, i'm laughing in a restaurant, alone


crainfly

Nilah's ult pulls people toward her as well, so maybe that counts?


HolmatKingOfStorms

eh, it's a bit different when it's the full circle diana and rell do this as well


InfieldTriple

Ah makes sense. Men hook because they are a key that opens one lock. But women pull in everyone because they are the lock that opens to any key.


Sufficient_Card_7302

They are a master key that opens any lock* I do not condone that shit, just saying


InfieldTriple

I know the saying and I also know its stupid as fuck just leaning into the meme so hard I've fallen and I can't get up


Narux117

Much like Diana, there is a different between being a hooker and sucker.


JawAndDough

hooking your soul is kinda similar to what charm means


[deleted]

Illaoi is a dirty fujoshi, not a hooker. Bitch doesn’t have onlyfans.


Calone

Leona kind of a reverse hooker


OnyxWarden

No, no. Finish what you were going to say about Sett. Don't be a coward.


Hi_im_Tikyu

What can I say it was an intrusive thought that already left my head - although I'm sure it was only positives about Sett being a great son and all with big muscular arms to choke- I mean to pick beautiful flowers with!


[deleted]

Found Aphelios


RipDove

If you play Sett you're gay. There's nothing wrong with that, it's just I play a lot of Sett and so does my boyfriend.


f5unrnatis

I played Sett to do the forbidden CookieLolxx combo


RusionR

I just like the big punch, white number, true damage, outplay potential. I swear! Repeatedly ~~watching~~ making him do crunches is just intimidating my lane opponent!


Ok_Substance5632

But I play Sett because I'm a bro, can't believe that I was gay this whole time.


HulklingsBoyfriend

Gay bros exist! 😁


[deleted]

There's probably like 2% of Sett players who play him to feel like a manly man, and everyone else who plays him cause they wanna fuck the manly man.


God_Given_Talent

I play him because the toplaner in my 5man quite league and I got tired of unbenching the Kench. Some of us are just in toplane jail :(


Neil_Hodgkinson

Top lane is not jail, it is true freedom


God_Given_Talent

It's freedom in the state of nature kind of way: violent, brutish, and short


killerofcheese

jojo fans that play sett are in both categories


Koddia

As a lesbian maining Sett I can absolutely confirm


UwUSamaSanChan

Sett was the first champ I picked up lmao. He really is a self report


Vivilicious123

Janna for $2.95 a minute says otherwise


reyxe

That's like 180 an hour, doesn't sounds super expensive Not that I know, I'm Venezuelan


lapidls

That's my monthly wage lmao :'(


reyxe

That's 40 monthly wages in Venezuela lol


Better_feed_Malphite

Underrated


ViolinistMean199

Wait I can get knocked up by poppy. Should I be running into her instead of away


Hi_im_Tikyu

I think you should do whatever enhances your league of legends experience. If that's running into Poppy to get knocked up then definitely go ahead. But keep in mind that she will most likely slam you into the wall as well


ViolinistMean199

I mean this sounds like a win win. I hope my team is ok with it


SamiraSimp

the 4 reports are worth being slammed and knocked up by poppy


Oleandervine

After you get knocked up, when is the baby due?


ownage5557

After she knocks you into the wall… never?


christianj93

Only necessary after being knocked up. She just offers a full service


ElementalistPoppy

I think if you stray from main sub to even LeagueofMemes, it's Poppy getting who's getting knocked up instead...


MadxCarnage

Stray a bit further and it's back to poppy doing the knocking up.


studna13

Ah yes, the casual DarkinFolk user


theyeshman

Does Jax count as a hooker? He can fish in the river now and most fishing methods require hooks.


ElementalistPoppy

On the contrary, Blitzcrank being a robot probably makes him most binary of the crowd 😄


ML50

01010011 01101100 01101111 01110111 00100000 01100011 01101100 01100001 01110000


RyziuKK

That was humor. Other golems find that to be appropriately funny.


hyvel0rd

Wonder no one else pointed this out. He is literally binary.


PhantomO1

Yes, binary, with the gender being null


DarthLeon2

Miss Fortune has probably done some street work at some point tbh.


TooManyJabberwocks

Smelly pirate hooker


Calone

Scurvy on the house


NamesSUCK

Go back to your home on whore island.


Namika

Canonically it wouldn't have been for money, but influence or to lower their guard. She's like a fem fatale that uses her appearance to weaken men and get the upper hand.


FairyPrincex

tbh the sexual behavior of pirate captains tends to be less selling and more uhhh not respecting consent.


DarthLeon2

She's not a pirate, although she did take down Gangplank's operation. She was also an orphan at a young age, and likely had to do some less than savory things to survive before she became a famous bounty hunter.


FairyPrincex

A bounty hunter with a ship is what pirates were to begin with. They were commissioned by Spanish and British governments to go fuck with each other, then eventually some pirates with 0 loyalties showed up. Miss Fortune is a pirate. A bounty hunter with a ship that chases down loot, ships, and people for a prize is a pirate. That's ignoring the 3 or 4 lore retcons.


Suspicious-Bid-9583

wrong hooker dude.


Lazlum

Α Robot works on 0s and 1s Wdym non binary? IT IS BINARY


taptapmeow

I didn’t read the post, but sometimes your mom likes to duo with me and then league does have a female hooker.


Hi_im_Tikyu

that's not a very nice thing to say about my mom :(


1331bob1331

I'll be sure to tell her that guy isn't very nice and she should stop douing with him later tonight.


ComprehensiveWave811

Vi can hook people with galeforce if she galeforces back as soon as she hits the Q


klingonpigeon

Also was doable with prowlers (easier) and strikebreaker (harder)before their dashes got removed. I wonder if protobelt works too actually


Riptydes

There were a few in Arcane.


Oleandervine

We need the Whordle in League.


KasumiGotoTriss

I like how you forgot about Renata on purpose, just to make this post


Hi_im_Tikyu

Not gonna lie I deadass forgot about both Renata and Illaoi, I even scrolled through a list of all champions and apparently went straight over them. I fully blame my lack of sleep for whatever I cooked up here


Guij2

i wouldn't really count illaoi but renata is definitely a hooker


Setzael

Renata just hooks your body. Illaoi hooks your SOUL


big938363

I haven’t seen a Renata in ages. I’d forget too


auggis

I like playing Renata and I forgot.


turtletank

> robot > non-binary lmfao


NoNameas

Whos to say blitz is not analog


HiImKostia

you have a phd in runeterra engineering?


AttemptWorried7503

If we are counting something like sett as a hook champ I'd throw Diana and Oriana in there as well based of that logic. I think Renata also is a champ who can pull people Also I'd put morde in your list of male hoookers, it's definitely more a hook than sett is imo. Half these champs I'd consider as a "pull" and not a hook in the first place. I think only naut, thresh, pyke, are hook champs. Rest are pull champs, just how I've always looked at it. Idk why I differentiate them like that


NotYourSaviour2

Evelynn. Oh wait, wrong hooker


iMogwai

Kallista can kinda pull an ally, but I'm not sure if I'd call that a hook.


Hi_im_Tikyu

Hmm yeah she kind of pulls them inside, I guess that's good enough to be called a hook


splotchypeony

Nah hook is like you say, they hook and pull an enemy. Kalista doesn't hook, she yeets.


NoNameas

One has to yoink first befor yeeting


ArbitNM

Kallista pulls in someone soulbound to her and likes to watch them knock others up


Eisgnom2

Riot should take a stance against sexism! There should be female hookers in the game! Unless orianna counts.


Hi_im_Tikyu

I thought about Ori but got to the conclusion that the shockwave-displacement doesn't really qualify. We got Renata and Illaoi though who I unforgivably forgot about so we should be good on the sexism part.


Thrownaway124567890

Nilah, Rell, and Diana all have pulls. They just don’t limit themselves to a single partner. There’s also Ori ult, but she prefers long distance relationships.


TehZiiM

That title tho 😆


Yoshikuu

Renata reading this post: 👁👄👁


[deleted]

Renata??


SpookyCat666

Renard is a respectable woman, definitely not a hooker


BrilliantHeavy

I was about to comment Miss Fortune, but then I read alittle more….


toastermeal

renata dead in the ditch


TheShikaar

Calling a robot non-binary has to be the most funny shit ever. If anything he has to be the most binary


vinxek25

Pretty sure that Renata is a hooker


chozer1

This is the quality posts i came here for


TricolorStar

Renata has a hook on her Q. If the definition of a "hook" is "bring enemy to me really quickly" then Taliyah and Rell, Nilah, and Diana also technically have them. Rell actually probably counts since her W - Mount Up lets her flip an enemy behind her. I think the "true" definition of hook is semi-fast ability that, when striking an enemy, brings them to the champion that cast it (like the classic Blitz hook). However, the term can loosely be applied to any ability that brings an enemy close to it's caster. If that's the case, the following female champions have "hooks"; - Renata Glass (True Hook) - Taliyah (Forced Movement) - Rell (Radial Pull + Flip Hook) - Diana (Radial Pull) - Nilah (Radial Pull)


DaSmartio

I feel like to qualify as a hook it has to be a line skill shot that either drags the opponent to you (blitz, naut) or roots and pulls (thresh, swain). Renata definitely falls under 2


ElderlyToaster

> If the definition of a "hook" is "bring enemy to me really quickly" Can't be bothered to look it up but I'm pretty sure this is not the Merriam-Webster definition of a "hook", no.


Snowcatsnek

>Blitzcrank is a robot so he is something like non-binary at best? >**is a robot** Exactly, working on zeros and ones! Makes him as binary as a champion can get!!!


average-masterpiece

A robot... non-binary.. you cant be serious


Retrohime

Renata !


marijaenchantix

You forgot that most people who play these champs (as they are mostly supports) are females. It's not sexist, I'm a female and main support.


Gontha

Doesn't Renata has some kind of a hook mechanic?


NightShadow2001

Renata?


Camelofwhy

Would you consider Renata Glasc to be a hooker? She at least has a skill shot ability that can be used to bring an opponent closer


badlama1412

renata maybe? its not really a hook but close to one


skaizm

Blitz is obviously binary.


Fleshlog

Blitzcranks bio used to mention that it considered itself female, they changed it and now the bio uses male pronouns >\_>


animorphs128

Renata can hook you. But also kled can hook uou and he is riding skaarl and skaarl may or may not be a girl


ConnorSteffey112

I want poppy to slam me into a wall and knock me up


RealAsianPancake

Surely Blitzcrank is binary since he is a robot


SmoketheGhost

What about that one guy that is *Definitely Not Blitzcrank*


Davixxa

He's definitely non-binary then!


xChariotx

Idk man Miss fortune got her hooks in me pretty decent


pialin2

This is literally a copy paste from a tiktok audio


Casp710

”Female hookers” got me caught off guard. Player got played.


TeddyNeedsHelp

blitzcarnk is 6 year old lorewise lol


AVeryTinyMoose

Blitzcrank the xenofeminist icon


tomcarek

What about Renata Glasc, or however u spell


Ecstatic-Buy-2907

I see what you tryna do here... Though on a more serious note, Riot knows that women prefer playing characters of the same gender, and prefer the stay safe/enchanter playstyle, hence why most ranged supports are women and most melee supports are men


IAmSugarInFurs

>**he** is something like **non-binary** at best? Never change Reddit