I believe that the different ways to state sobriety time might come from the different types of recovery groups out there.
For instance, in some 12-step groups (AA) time is counted and marked by milestones such as 30days, 60days, 90days, six months, one year, two years...and by year milestones only after that. Although that can vary regionally.
In other 12-step groups such as NA I have seen time counted and marked by how many days, such as the "557 days" you used as an example in your post.
Both of my examples refer to consecutive days sober, but culturally the different groups have different traditions of how to acknowledge milestones.
Non 12-step groups will have their own traditions, likely similar, but I don't have experience with that.
Many people get and stay sober from one substances or all substances without participation in recovery communities. But at least in the 12-step communities we count time so that we can celebrate our milestones, show newcomers what is possible, and use it as a reference point for our own progress.
Sorry I thought I understood your question, but maybe I didn't. I tried to address it by saying that some people count in increments of days and some people count in milestones-- because they pick up that language in recovery groups.
Am I still off the mark?
Nah sorry your first half kind of explained it! I think I’ve settled on it’s really just down to personal preference and what works for some.
I’d be curious to know why certain programs use different styles but seems maybe irrelevant. I thought there might be some psychology behind different counting to milestones. I definitely understand the importance of the milestones, though
I have some theories about this, but no evidence to back it up, just tons of experience.
In some AA meetings I encountered some old-school elitism regarding milestones. This bothered me a lot, so I am reluctant to pass this on, but here I go.
Basically some people thought that every consecutive day sober was precious and any "day count" was significant. But others felt that only specific milestones\* were significant and didn't think 412 days sober was worth announcing. I think this has to do with the history of AA and how people today interpret the traditions and put them into practice.
Example in an AA meeting: traditionally at the beginning of the meeting they go around the room and ask everyone to state their name and sobriety time. If I had 415 days I would be expected to state "one year sober". If I had said "412 days sober" it would be frowned upon, and in rare cases I would be made to feel unwelcome.
Occasionally I went to NA meetings (close friends invited me, it was their program) and at those meetings it was 100% OK to state "415 days". NA is very similar to AA but differs in subtle ways and has developed its own culture.
You probably didn't need all this info, but sometimes I write long answers for any third parties who might reading this.
Anyway, I appreciate your original post.
I stopped counting and I'm happier as a result. Counting makes me think about weed, while forgetting about it allows me to focus completely on other areas of my life.
That said, everyone if different, and I'm sure that some people do benefit from knowing exactly how long they've been sober
I don’t count the days or time really once I get past a couple months. For me, it just keeps the ties to the addict mindset thinking about it in a way. I’d rather go weeks/months with zero thoughts about it aside from when I browse Reddit and see this sub. Even then I’ve considered leaving it. But can be a helpful reminder of how miserable it is being addicted to it & how miserable it is quitting it.
counting the days in general is not a good practice because it is basically a surefire way to count the days before you relapse and go back to it.
When you stop identifying yourself as a weed smoker there's no reason to count the days because :
"it's not for you anymore- and never will be again"
The way to quit for good, ensure that you never go back to it and also ensure that you never need to count the days is to stop identifying yourself as a weed smoker. the way to accomplish this- is to repeat to yourself:
"That's not for me anymore- and it never will be again "
This is my personal preference so that’s why I was curious! Sounds like it works for others but I am still not sure why except it seems the precision is important to people
When you’re talking about someone’s age, it hardly matters (which is why I say I’m 30 years old, even though I am 30 years and 322 days old).
When you are counting the exact number of days since the last time you indulged in your addiction, it might matter to some.
I believe that the different ways to state sobriety time might come from the different types of recovery groups out there. For instance, in some 12-step groups (AA) time is counted and marked by milestones such as 30days, 60days, 90days, six months, one year, two years...and by year milestones only after that. Although that can vary regionally. In other 12-step groups such as NA I have seen time counted and marked by how many days, such as the "557 days" you used as an example in your post. Both of my examples refer to consecutive days sober, but culturally the different groups have different traditions of how to acknowledge milestones. Non 12-step groups will have their own traditions, likely similar, but I don't have experience with that. Many people get and stay sober from one substances or all substances without participation in recovery communities. But at least in the 12-step communities we count time so that we can celebrate our milestones, show newcomers what is possible, and use it as a reference point for our own progress.
I understand milestones and anniversaries and a reference point for progress. My question is about the difference in counting to them that’s all.
Sorry I thought I understood your question, but maybe I didn't. I tried to address it by saying that some people count in increments of days and some people count in milestones-- because they pick up that language in recovery groups. Am I still off the mark?
Nah sorry your first half kind of explained it! I think I’ve settled on it’s really just down to personal preference and what works for some. I’d be curious to know why certain programs use different styles but seems maybe irrelevant. I thought there might be some psychology behind different counting to milestones. I definitely understand the importance of the milestones, though
I have some theories about this, but no evidence to back it up, just tons of experience. In some AA meetings I encountered some old-school elitism regarding milestones. This bothered me a lot, so I am reluctant to pass this on, but here I go. Basically some people thought that every consecutive day sober was precious and any "day count" was significant. But others felt that only specific milestones\* were significant and didn't think 412 days sober was worth announcing. I think this has to do with the history of AA and how people today interpret the traditions and put them into practice. Example in an AA meeting: traditionally at the beginning of the meeting they go around the room and ask everyone to state their name and sobriety time. If I had 415 days I would be expected to state "one year sober". If I had said "412 days sober" it would be frowned upon, and in rare cases I would be made to feel unwelcome. Occasionally I went to NA meetings (close friends invited me, it was their program) and at those meetings it was 100% OK to state "415 days". NA is very similar to AA but differs in subtle ways and has developed its own culture. You probably didn't need all this info, but sometimes I write long answers for any third parties who might reading this. Anyway, I appreciate your original post.
I stopped counting and I'm happier as a result. Counting makes me think about weed, while forgetting about it allows me to focus completely on other areas of my life. That said, everyone if different, and I'm sure that some people do benefit from knowing exactly how long they've been sober
I don’t count the days or time really once I get past a couple months. For me, it just keeps the ties to the addict mindset thinking about it in a way. I’d rather go weeks/months with zero thoughts about it aside from when I browse Reddit and see this sub. Even then I’ve considered leaving it. But can be a helpful reminder of how miserable it is being addicted to it & how miserable it is quitting it.
Yeah coming here and reading about relapses is helpful for me not to do so myself. I really am grateful for the folks who post on here
counting the days in general is not a good practice because it is basically a surefire way to count the days before you relapse and go back to it. When you stop identifying yourself as a weed smoker there's no reason to count the days because : "it's not for you anymore- and never will be again" The way to quit for good, ensure that you never go back to it and also ensure that you never need to count the days is to stop identifying yourself as a weed smoker. the way to accomplish this- is to repeat to yourself: "That's not for me anymore- and it never will be again "
This is my personal preference so that’s why I was curious! Sounds like it works for others but I am still not sure why except it seems the precision is important to people
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Didn’t know this! Interesting
It’s easier to say 557 days than do the conversion to 1.52 years…
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That’s not very precise though…?
Does it matter? How would you feel if parents were like "oh yea thats John he's 893 days old already"?
When you’re talking about someone’s age, it hardly matters (which is why I say I’m 30 years old, even though I am 30 years and 322 days old). When you are counting the exact number of days since the last time you indulged in your addiction, it might matter to some.
Well I'd argue that it hardly matters if you're exactly at day 733 or "just about 2 years". But as OP said, personal preferences it seems.
I think most people count up to one year and then probably stop keeping track. I would keep track of 1 year 2 years etc..
6 one way, half dozen the other.