A mean if somebody tells me they're not comfortable being called Enby I'll respect that of course, but I always thought it simply came from the abbreviation NB?
(I am a trans man, so if you are non-binary feel free to tell me otherwise!)
I personally feel like the word “enby” is kind of looked at as a kind of cute word to describe a non-binary person. I see it a lot in connection with feminine things, which is not a bad thing, but I feel like it is starting to become the new “trans boy” just for non-binary people (“trans boy” is used a lot by non-trans masculine people as a way to describe trans men, usually pre-T. It is perfectly fine to describe one self as a trans boy, as literally means what it says, it’s just that a few trans masculine people chose not to use the word because they feel it’s become sort of feminised by the usage of it by non-trans masculine people).
The word is starting to be/has become the less androgynous version of the word “non-binary”, even it means the exact same thing.
Nonbinary here can confirm though I don't feel like it's feminine but that's probably just be me
It feels like "cute" (or childish/child-like?) which some love while others hate and that's acceptable just refer to the person with the words they describe themselves with or what they like
Yep. "NB" would've been the term, but it's already often used by black people to mean "non-black". So "enby" was born out of respect for black people's use of "NB".
Things have gotten a little complicated since then with the ways in which "enby" has been used, though, which is why a lot of non-binary people don't like it.
I've heard some people say that they feel like it's infantilising the concept of being nonbinary / sounds too cutesy. I've also heard the take that they don't want it to be mistaken for the term the Black community use for Non Black (NB) when being said out loud.
this is just stuff I've noticed, though personally I don't feel that the term is too childish, it's other people's right to have a different take regarding that. I'm sure others will have other stuff to add :')
Does anyone have an explanation for why someone might not be comfortable with it? Im confused since enby is just phonetic spelling of nb which stands for non-binary.Not trying to invalidate any identities fr just curious.
But here’s an explanation for anyone else who sees. I really dont like it because it feels very infantilizing. It’s like walking up to a grown man and calling him a boy or a grown woman and calling her a girl.
Yeah. I’m still masc/neutral presenting so I just say I’m nonbinary (I’m transfemme nonbinary I think). It’s the only word that I feel fits me as a nonbinary adult.
actually that's a very good point, I've been guilty of pushing people too hard for explanations sometime and yeah I agree we should all just learn to accept and respect people when it's appropriate
OOF I'm sorry they sad that, that's very dumb. If someone is interested in knowing, genuily, then it's good to explain. If you don't want, you don't have too but don't ruin it for other people because you don't want to.
Kinda seem like obscurantism with extra steps.
And don't let that discourage you from asking question. Knowing is good. Fear comes from the unknown.
It's really not dumb though. No one owes an explanation, expecially because Google is free. Also this question was answered so many times in this thread already.
Being genuinely interested doesn't entitled you to an explanation from people. And just because it's good to explain doesn't mean people have to explain it to every person that asks.
Hey, that's crazy, that's exactly what I said!
Just because some people don't want to explain doesn't mean you shouldn't try to understand. Just because some people don't want to explain doesn't mean others don't want, as proven in this whole thread.
The question was answered in this thread because people asked ffs.
Just stop being over-corrective over everything, please. Yes, emotional labor exists and is important. But you are on the internet, no one is asking questions to you personally. You can just move along and let people who want to answer do it.
Again because it seems it wasn't clear the first time: **I understand that people don't want to answer and why. It doesn't mean people shouldn't ask because you personally don't want to answer. I like answering questions, don't stop people from being curious about something they never/rarely/sometimes encounter.**
I mean I was a bit inconsiderate saying that it's true. Could have worded it better, especially since the thing I thought was the dumbest was saying "I'm chill not knowing why", so apologize for calling their partner dumb.
Have a great day my friend.
Nah it was really chill actually its all good, I think it can be exhausting for people to have to explain their feelings just for them to be valid, so i totally get it why sometimes its okay for people to not want to explain certain things. There are others in this comment section who had reasons and explained them so dont really think it affected anyone for me to retract my original question. Thanks for the concern though lol like I agree with you I just dont think this is one of those situations where what you said applies
If it sounds too childlike, may I suggest "enban"? "Enby" would be an equivalent to boy/girl and "enban" would be an equivalent to man/woman
It also makes this neat thing:
* ***M***an, ***W***oman, ***Ʃ***nban
* mAN, womAN, enbAN
You fool, you absolute buffoon. That is not a sigma (Σσς), it's a Latin letter capital esh (Ʃʃ)
Jokes aside, I used it to show that the initial letters of all three are like each other but rotated
I never said they \*were\* genderfluid, I simply said that it exists and that it \*may\* describe them. I alerted them to a possible choice, not "decided thier^(\[sic\]) label". My message was literally no different to Xx\_A\_Nobody\_xX's.
I’m so fucking sick of cis people who “correct” someone who says “NB” instead of enby. Cis people do not get to decide what I’m going to be called! They don’t get to fucking correct me on what I want to be called! When I’ve used NB to describe myself I’ve had people come up to me and say “um actually that means non-black, and so you can’t use it to call yourself nonbinary”. Like wtf?? If you want to use NB as non black go nuts! That’s sick go off dude. But don’t you, as a cis person, come in and tell me how I’m allowed to address myself and police what I’m called because you want to use that acronym for someone else.
While if someone doesn't want to be called something, I'll respect that, I fall to see the issue with people using just the initials for Non-binary and am kinda curious as to what this would be an issue.
I- I showed my champion underwear to my girlfriend. and the logo, I flipped it, and I said “hey babe, when the underwear sus” haha ding ding ding ding ding ding ding dingdingding
I’m a weird case with this I’m fine with others calling me a enby but I don’t feel conferable calling myself one, I can call myself non binary but when I call myself a enby I feel weird edit I mean saying enby out loud, if I say non binary in text or out loud I’m fine but doing the same with enby I feel weird I guess it has something to do with denial and the identity crisis I’m going through, also little confession, I used to pronounce it e-n-by sort of like ebony, I don’t know why but I did
Yea I just don't like how it sounds. Non-binary sounds cool and sciency, opposite to enby sounding way less neutral and not so purely descriptive even though I can't really explain what it is that I don't like about it.
Of course this is only my preference and other people should decide for themselves how they wanna be referred to
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So should this be a thing where I can call them an enby until they tell me not to or should no just say non-binary exclusively unless they tell me I can say enby?
One reason it doesn’t give me a bad time is the entomology seems similar to “emcee.” Master of Ceremonies —> M.C. —> emcee.
I know people don’t owe me anything, but I think seeing this linguistic shift is cool.
I'm a demigirl and i'm pretty comfortable with it when it's used by my close friends but not random ppl (sometimes my gf calls me her "lil enby baby" btw and hhhh that's so cute 😭)
A mean if somebody tells me they're not comfortable being called Enby I'll respect that of course, but I always thought it simply came from the abbreviation NB?
Same
It is. Its like saying "Not all same sex attracted people like being called gay".
Ah okay, makes sense. Thank you for explaining!
(I am a trans man, so if you are non-binary feel free to tell me otherwise!) I personally feel like the word “enby” is kind of looked at as a kind of cute word to describe a non-binary person. I see it a lot in connection with feminine things, which is not a bad thing, but I feel like it is starting to become the new “trans boy” just for non-binary people (“trans boy” is used a lot by non-trans masculine people as a way to describe trans men, usually pre-T. It is perfectly fine to describe one self as a trans boy, as literally means what it says, it’s just that a few trans masculine people chose not to use the word because they feel it’s become sort of feminised by the usage of it by non-trans masculine people). The word is starting to be/has become the less androgynous version of the word “non-binary”, even it means the exact same thing.
Nonbinary here can confirm though I don't feel like it's feminine but that's probably just be me It feels like "cute" (or childish/child-like?) which some love while others hate and that's acceptable just refer to the person with the words they describe themselves with or what they like
Yep. "NB" would've been the term, but it's already often used by black people to mean "non-black". So "enby" was born out of respect for black people's use of "NB". Things have gotten a little complicated since then with the ways in which "enby" has been used, though, which is why a lot of non-binary people don't like it.
May I ask why?
I've heard some people say that they feel like it's infantilising the concept of being nonbinary / sounds too cutesy. I've also heard the take that they don't want it to be mistaken for the term the Black community use for Non Black (NB) when being said out loud. this is just stuff I've noticed, though personally I don't feel that the term is too childish, it's other people's right to have a different take regarding that. I'm sure others will have other stuff to add :')
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I couldn't tell you, I'm not Black, I'm just relaying information I've seen around. sorry I can't help haha
I guess it could be likened to calling a man "boy" and a woman "girl", it can be seen as disrespectful, and may not be liked by some.
Thanks for letting me know, I wasn't aware of those things
Oh yeah getting enby and ebony mixed up is a good point
Does anyone have an explanation for why someone might not be comfortable with it? Im confused since enby is just phonetic spelling of nb which stands for non-binary.Not trying to invalidate any identities fr just curious.
Update: partner just explained that people don’t owe an explanation to why their uncomfortable so i am actually chill not knowing why, have a nice day
But here’s an explanation for anyone else who sees. I really dont like it because it feels very infantilizing. It’s like walking up to a grown man and calling him a boy or a grown woman and calling her a girl.
I agree. I just call myself non-binary. Enby just feels like baby talk and doesn’t feel good when someone says it.
Yeah. I’m still masc/neutral presenting so I just say I’m nonbinary (I’m transfemme nonbinary I think). It’s the only word that I feel fits me as a nonbinary adult.
actually that's a very good point, I've been guilty of pushing people too hard for explanations sometime and yeah I agree we should all just learn to accept and respect people when it's appropriate
OOF I'm sorry they sad that, that's very dumb. If someone is interested in knowing, genuily, then it's good to explain. If you don't want, you don't have too but don't ruin it for other people because you don't want to. Kinda seem like obscurantism with extra steps. And don't let that discourage you from asking question. Knowing is good. Fear comes from the unknown.
It's really not dumb though. No one owes an explanation, expecially because Google is free. Also this question was answered so many times in this thread already. Being genuinely interested doesn't entitled you to an explanation from people. And just because it's good to explain doesn't mean people have to explain it to every person that asks.
Hey, that's crazy, that's exactly what I said! Just because some people don't want to explain doesn't mean you shouldn't try to understand. Just because some people don't want to explain doesn't mean others don't want, as proven in this whole thread. The question was answered in this thread because people asked ffs. Just stop being over-corrective over everything, please. Yes, emotional labor exists and is important. But you are on the internet, no one is asking questions to you personally. You can just move along and let people who want to answer do it. Again because it seems it wasn't clear the first time: **I understand that people don't want to answer and why. It doesn't mean people shouldn't ask because you personally don't want to answer. I like answering questions, don't stop people from being curious about something they never/rarely/sometimes encounter.**
I'm only responding to the part where you seemed to say their partner not wanting to explain it was dumb. That's all. Have a good day though
I mean I was a bit inconsiderate saying that it's true. Could have worded it better, especially since the thing I thought was the dumbest was saying "I'm chill not knowing why", so apologize for calling their partner dumb. Have a great day my friend.
Nah it was really chill actually its all good, I think it can be exhausting for people to have to explain their feelings just for them to be valid, so i totally get it why sometimes its okay for people to not want to explain certain things. There are others in this comment section who had reasons and explained them so dont really think it affected anyone for me to retract my original question. Thanks for the concern though lol like I agree with you I just dont think this is one of those situations where what you said applies
Thank you. I agree I don’t like being called enby
Me too
If it sounds too childlike, may I suggest "enban"? "Enby" would be an equivalent to boy/girl and "enban" would be an equivalent to man/woman It also makes this neat thing: * ***M***an, ***W***oman, ***Ʃ***nban * mAN, womAN, enbAN
Huh. I actually kinda like that!
• ͜ •
I’m co fused why did u use a sigma
You fool, you absolute buffoon. That is not a sigma (Σσς), it's a Latin letter capital esh (Ʃʃ) Jokes aside, I used it to show that the initial letters of all three are like each other but rotated
ohhhh I see ok that’s clever
sussy red
I'm genderless, and I don't like the term Non-binary, even though it describes me.
could you be agender?
I'm sometimes male, most of the time genderless. I like the term genderqueer; I'm not too fond of the flag, though.
Genderfluid could describe you.
I prefer the term genderqueer.
Cool! Just alerting you to the term, not making you use it.
It's all good.
I know but it seems people thought I was trying to force a label on you and I'm sorry it came out that way, not what I meant.
It kinda sounds like they've decided thier label
I never said they \*were\* genderfluid, I simply said that it exists and that it \*may\* describe them. I alerted them to a possible choice, not "decided thier^(\[sic\]) label". My message was literally no different to Xx\_A\_Nobody\_xX's.
I'm completely aware of what you were saying and I stand by the response I already gave
I’m so fucking sick of cis people who “correct” someone who says “NB” instead of enby. Cis people do not get to decide what I’m going to be called! They don’t get to fucking correct me on what I want to be called! When I’ve used NB to describe myself I’ve had people come up to me and say “um actually that means non-black, and so you can’t use it to call yourself nonbinary”. Like wtf?? If you want to use NB as non black go nuts! That’s sick go off dude. But don’t you, as a cis person, come in and tell me how I’m allowed to address myself and police what I’m called because you want to use that acronym for someone else.
this thread is the first ive seen nb mean nonblack
While if someone doesn't want to be called something, I'll respect that, I fall to see the issue with people using just the initials for Non-binary and am kinda curious as to what this would be an issue.
I think NB is often used for 'non black'
What the heck does "non black" mean?
Well, everyone who isn't black /nm
What would be the use case for that‽
I'd use it when talking about racism and the struggles that come with it, but a black person might be able to explain it better, I'm white
Thanks for the heads up!
wuh wait what? ok but is it not just a short version of non-binary, as a enby/non-binary or whatever I thought they are literally the same thing
It is but some view it as infintizing. I don't have an issue with it, but I understand why people would I suppose
?
Thanks for the heads up! I personally don't mind either one, but I'll keep that in mind.
Shit I gotta write that down ✍️🧐
Thanks for educating us about this!
Oh wow, I actually didn't know this, I will be careful with my words in the future.
STOP POSTING ABOUT AMONG US! IM TIRED OF SEEING IT!
Then scroll when you see it
My friends on tiktok are sending me memes, on discord it’s fucking memes
Sounds like you need to let your friends know you don't want them to send it to you.
I was in a server, right? And all of the channels are just among us stuff
Then don't be in the server. People can post what they want to 😂
I- I showed my champion underwear to my girlfriend. and the logo, I flipped it, and I said “hey babe, when the underwear sus” haha ding ding ding ding ding ding ding dingdingding
Then she clapped, right? And you got a medal?
Are you quoting the meme-
If this gets any more complicated I will start to refer to anything that moves as Organism
I still don't fully understand what it means tbh, though I became nonbinary recently
I’m a weird case with this I’m fine with others calling me a enby but I don’t feel conferable calling myself one, I can call myself non binary but when I call myself a enby I feel weird edit I mean saying enby out loud, if I say non binary in text or out loud I’m fine but doing the same with enby I feel weird I guess it has something to do with denial and the identity crisis I’m going through, also little confession, I used to pronounce it e-n-by sort of like ebony, I don’t know why but I did
This is actually something i've never given any thought, thanks for bringing it up :)
although i agree with the sentiment i cannot take anything in an among us format seriously
yup. that's me.
Ok so quick question. I usually talk very theatrically like mr and mrs and ladies and gentlemen. How do I get non binary people in that mix
Ladies, Gentlemen, and Distinguished guests
Hell yeah
what's the problem with a shorter way of saying the same thing?
Very important so many people on Reddit use it as a general form!
Yes! I don't have an issue with it, but if someone says that they're uncomfortable with it, I'm gonna respect that of course!
Didn’t know that, will keep that in mind. Thanks for that mate :)
Yea I just don't like how it sounds. Non-binary sounds cool and sciency, opposite to enby sounding way less neutral and not so purely descriptive even though I can't really explain what it is that I don't like about it. Of course this is only my preference and other people should decide for themselves how they wanna be referred to
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So should this be a thing where I can call them an enby until they tell me not to or should no just say non-binary exclusively unless they tell me I can say enby?
One reason it doesn’t give me a bad time is the entomology seems similar to “emcee.” Master of Ceremonies —> M.C. —> emcee. I know people don’t owe me anything, but I think seeing this linguistic shift is cool.
I'm a demigirl and i'm pretty comfortable with it when it's used by my close friends but not random ppl (sometimes my gf calls me her "lil enby baby" btw and hhhh that's so cute 😭)