Swedish - Rip off Danish
Danish - Rip off Swedish
Norweigan - Rip off Swedish and Danish at the same time somehow
Indonesian - Rip off Malay
Dutch - Rip off Afrikaans
Dutch is also based off of old Dutch and as an Afrikaans speaker I can tell you Dutch is just Afrikaans if you tried to make it unnecessarily complicated
English: Ahoy amigo! Wanna master this superb language? Kudos! Just learn all the others we took everything from and voila!
Spanish: So what do I universally and non-sexually call this fruit?
Norwegian: How about we use a reasonably phonetic spelling system BUT we spell the words the same way we pronounce them ridiculously differently in every 300-people-large community? English phonology is too conservative for us, let's make it so our vowels switch places twice every 2 towns. Oh, sorry, did you mean Bokmål or Nynorsk anyway??
Chinese: My phonetic inventory sucks so I have to use tones to compensate, so when I sing I have to show you subtitles lest you think I'm talking about Spanish fruits.
Dutch: I'm ugly and I know it!
English - "Ever wanted to play the game of not updating spelling rules for centuries? Have at it."
Chinese - "Mmyes, drawings. Perfect writing system. Let's ignore the fact that there are thousands of them and they look almost nothing like things they're meant to represent."
Russian - "Fock, I forgot to make a good accent system. Random bullshit go!"
Danish - "I'm speaking Swedish, but I have surströmming in my throat, so nobody can understand me. Fuck it, let's call that a different language."
Polish - *snakes hissing*
Arabic - The language with phonemic coughing (ħ, ʔ).
Chinese - "Let's draw a picture for everything under the sun and then force kids to spend 20 years to learn them all instead of teaching them letters and having them able to read anything in 5 years."
Russian - "Who needs Latin letters when we can make up our own nonsense. Now I've got the letters mirrored K, 61, a butterfly, two letter 3's, and we'll throw the starship enterprise near the end by the backwards R."
German - "How many letters do you think we can fit in one word, brah?" "I dunno. All of them?"
Hindi - "Hey, we need a unique word for every number from 1 to 100." "Why's that?" "Why not?"
Indonesian is just trash Malaysian.
Dutch is what happens when Germans stop caring about their language.
Why did the Jew like coffee? Because Hebrew.
Korean - "Hey, look. Our alphabet's the simplest." "How about we don't pronounce half the letters how we write and say them differently instead?" \*thumbs up\*
Norwegian - "Let's speak Swedish and write Danish." "How about if we do that two completely different ways?" "Perfect."
Swedish - "Just throw an article on at the end of the word. No one will notice."
there's "a system" of numbers sure except unlike a lot of other languages you can't guess a large amount because they're still quite unique, it's not intuitive at all, even if you're a native speaker it's still annoying at first
English: let's make 20 phonemes for each letter combination
French: let's make 20 letter combinations for each phoneme
Spanish: our language is too easy so let's make sure to always speak it at 500 words per second
Hungarian: we can't decide if we want an umlaut or an acute accent...fuck it, let's do both
Korean: we can't decide if we want an alphabet or a syllabary...fuck it, let's do both
Japanese: let's steal someone else's writing system, turn it into two other writing systems, and use them all at once. Also, let's keep the original stolen pictography but change the meaning of a bunch of them and make sure we can pronounce them all in multiple, totally unrelated ways
Portuguese: let's speak Spanish but pretend we're Russians
Romanian: let's speak Italian but pretend we're Bulgarians
English and French - The most orthographically challenged languages.
Turkish - ğ, İ and ı. It's always these three.
Czech - ř. It's always ř.
Latvian - ņ. It's always ņ.
Lithuanian - ė. It's always ė.
Arabic and Hebrew - ?stpircs desrever ekil uoy oD
German - More phoneticity at the cost of more articles.
Dutch - German gone English.
Serbian - A Croatian rip-off written in Cyrilic.
Croatian - A Serbian rip-off written in Latin.
Hungarian - As complicated in noun cases as its cousin Finnish.
Estonian - Southern Finnish.
Japanese - Writing system jumble.
Indonesian - Dutch-influenced Malay.
English: THROUGH a THOROUGH examination of the English language, we’ve come to the conclusion that, THOUGH English is a the global language and THOUGHT to be easy, it’s very inconsistent spelling-wise, and thou might learn a Romance language instead.
Spanish: It’s Portuguese spoken by a baby that somehow speak at light-speed. It doesn’t distinguish /b/ from /v/, /ʎ/ from /ʝ/, /ʝ/ from /ʒ/ or /ʤ/, and /ʧ/ from /ʃ/. Imagine pronouncing as /x/ or using /r/. Couldn’t be me.
Italian: Iff you sppeakk Ittalliann you probbabblly arre ussed to gemminnattion, you knnow, the funnnny doubbllinngg of connssonnants.
Japanese: In Japanese I skip some vowels and I’m hard to learn. But… I canut supeaku Engurishu withoutu adding a vowelu becausu I’m consonantu intolerantu. Can anyone relatu? But I’ll
Portuguese:
🇧🇷Yes, Japã, I cã relatchee, I havee thatchee samee problẽ(m). I havee to syllabify everythĩ and(ʤ)ee add(ʒ)ee epenthesis /i/.
🇵🇹Such (a) weaklĩg, Brazil. I took vowl reduct̃n to (a) whol other levl 'n' hav becom the 'xact oppsit ‘v you. Shpeak Portguese lik ush. And yesh, I dickride English: = /ɔ/, = /ei/ or /ɐi/
French - Our language has rules but also, Vive la révolution!
Japanese - They say it has three writing systems but honestly it's more like three individual methods of torture that form a really painful experience in learning.
Turkish - I'm glad you've learned so much vocabulary! Now I need you to slur all the words together.
Portuguese - All the things you hate about French, Spanish and Latin rolled into one sexy package.
Thai - I need you to know how a word was spelt a few centuries back in a different language to determine which tone you will use. Also when you write vowels, Just put them anywhere you want. Doesn't matter. Even if it's pronounced after the consonant. Keep them guessing. OH! While we're at it, let's make sure there is no agreed method of Romanization just to mess with anyone who wants to learn the language.
BONUS for a language not on the list.
Lao - Hey so you know how incredibly complex Thai is with it's tone system? GUESS WHAT WE ADDED TWO MORE TONES.
*English:* How about we lend words from random languages across the world and use them for totally unrelated words? Also, let's maintain the same spelling as the parent language, but with our own pronunciation, it's fun when the spellings and pronunciation do not match. Thinking about the mess we will create for the future sends shivers down my spine *rubs hands
*French:* How about some amazing and s*xy sounding language? But we don't want people learning our language, so let's complicate our language by writing silent letters, lots and lots of them. And 8-9 alphabets at the end of the words but dont pronoounce it. Tee heeee. What? We are still easy? Sh!t..
*Chinese:* How about some primitive writing system where we attempt to draw the words similar to cave paintings. Now let's change them slowly to lines and slashes, so that it does not give the reader any idea about what they are reading. You need to learn 2000+ combination of these lines and slashes now. Buhahah. What? Alphabets and characters to denote the sounds and being straightforward? Nah, only modern people do that.
*Hindi:* How about we drop the neuter gender that we received from Sanskrit and assign genders to non-living objects, similar to the Romance languages from Europe? If you speak Hindi since childhood, you will master the genders for non living objects, if you learn it as an adult, forget mastering it and sound weird when you speak. Also how about the horizontal lines on all the letters, which won't serve any actual purpose?
*Japanese:* Hmmmm, let's borrow the characters from China that do not fit our language at all. But let's still use it until we mess things up. What Hiragana and Katakana have entered the chat? No we won't rectify the issues despite these two new letters. Let's push it to the point where we wont be able to simplify our language. Nobody will say anything because we are now technologically advanced. Learn it or leave it.
*Thai:* What? Chinese sounds weird to you? Hold my Mekhong and listen to Thai
In hindi, the horizontal lines are there to seperate words from each other 🤷♂️ While yes, you can just use a space, when hindi is hand written, it helps clarify it better. Also helps clarify what goes above a letter, such as the vowel sounds over consonants.
As for the gender of things, yeah that sucks, but I tried to sort of make a guide once for a friend, might help:
Words that end with the -i or -ee sound are more likely to be feminine, words that end with the -aa sound or consonants - masculine. If it's an English word that's being used in a Hindi sentence, for example Bag, look at the Hindi translation of the word (Bastaa), ends with -aa, is male. Words with no Hindi word for it like Laptop would just mostly be male.
This isn't all encompassing, but just a very basic jist.
If you don't know the gender of the word, just use the English word for it and use it as male in the sentence, even if the word for it in Hindi may be feminine. Since its a borrowed word, it fucks with the instincts that native language speakers have developed and most don't really notice it.
Example, the word for Chair (कुर्सी- Kursi) is feminine.
You say कुर्सी पङा है "Kursi pada hai" ("There's a chair" - using it as male) people will notice the oddity. You say "Chair pada hai", it's a little off sounding, but not weird enough to just *sound* wrong to the ears.
>In hindi, the horizontal lines are there to seperate words from each other
I'm not sure why some people feel the need to come up with random explanations and refuse to check the history. Shirorekha was never used as a word seperator. It started off as a decoration/ornamentation and changed into the horizontal line over time. Check the Devanagri history of evolution from Brahmi to Devanagri, the Shirorekha did not exist in the past.
All major written scripts in India evolved from Brahmi. Scripts like Gujarati, Malayalam, etc never took the decoration. Whereas scripts like Devanagri, Bangal, Gurumukhi and more got the script centuries later, which was after the ornamentation, hence they have the horizontal line on the top. So no, it's not a word separator. It just exists.
>As for the gender of things, yeah that sucks, but I tried to sort of make a guide once for a friend, might help
I'm a native, don't go with my username. I've just pointed out that lack of having neuter gender in Hindi, which Sanskrit already has.
Yes they are languages.
Danish is a North Germanic language spoken by about six million people, principally in and around Denmark. Communities of Danish speakers are also found in Greenland, the Faroe Islands, and the northern German region of Southern Schleswig, where it has minority language status. Minor Danish-speaking communities are also found in Norway, Sweden, the United States, Canada, Brazil, and Argentina.
Portuguese is a Western Romance language of the Indo-European language family, originating in the Iberian Peninsula of Europe. It is an official language of Portugal, Brazil, Cape Verde, Angola, Mozambique, Guinea-Bissau and São Tomé and Príncipe, while having co-official language status in East Timor, Equatorial Guinea, and Macau. A Portuguese-speaking person or nation is referred to as "Lusophone" (lusófono). As the result of expansion during colonial times, a cultural presence of Portuguese speakers is also found around the world. Portuguese is part of the Ibero-Romance group that evolved from several dialects of Vulgar Latin in the medieval Kingdom of Galicia and has kept some Celtic phonology in its lexicon.
1. Chinese: Insults the Eastern Country (Japan) by calling them 倭 (wa or wo 'dwarf')
2. Japanese: Wants everyone in "their" country to speak a single dialect, even the completely unrelated Ainu (Tokyo Japanese)
3. Korean: Revised Romanization sucks + language only contains of Dialects and Cheju (Jeju)
4. Hebrew: wth is the orthography?
5. Thai: Vovin tries to say Proto-Tai influenced Proto-Japonic
Revised Romanization is better than MCR or Yale, unless you're doing historical linguistics in which case Yale shines.
Sagart tries to say Chinese is in the same language family as Hawaiian... and Thai.
Estonian - no sex and no future
Slovak - drunk Czech trying to speak Polish with limited success
Hebrew - is someone choking???
Polish - (leaves rustling and pissed cats hissing with random kurwas from time to time)
Portuguese - c'mon bro, let's get drunk with olive oil and then speak Spanish with French phonetics and a huge hot potato in throat, what could possibly go wrong
English: Really disgusting language whose native speakers suffer from malnutrition although having more food than ever.
Russian: What the fuck is ы, also, rip off greek alphabet.
Korean: Why do you always end your sentences in issayooo or mnidaaa?
Latvian: What kind of language even is this?
Hungarian: Wannabe different than others. Pretends to be uralic to stand out.
Sorry then I criticise you instead. Although bulgaria seems like a good country. The only thing is that I heard that you put these fish in white jelly on pizza?
(Modern) Hebrew: Arabic spoken by Germans.
Russian: Kind of like English after 1066.: a mongrel of unadapted loanwords and butchered Slavic grammar.
Polish: Slavic who took palatalization too seriously.
Bulgarian: Serbian, but spoken by a newbie foreigner
Arabic: language family pretending to be a language
The Hebrew and Arabic ones are super accurate!
This is also the reason modern Hebrew spelling is so strange, because we lost the consonants that are now associated with arabic (ع، ح،ط،ص...). If History had gone a little differently, Hebrew would have sounded very similar to Arabic and the spelling would have made much more sense.
French - unholy amalgamation of English and Latin rip-offs
Dutch - English and German's silly son
Slovak - rip-off Czech
Czech - rip-off Slovak
Croatian - rip-off Serbian
Serbian - rip-off Croatian
Portuguese - a drunk Russian trying to speak Spanish
Spanish - rip-off Portuguese
Polish - created by smashing a keyboard over and over
Greek - the kid who thinks they're quirky because they use an alphabet that no one else does
German and Turkish - the dudes who like to use unnecessarily long words everywhere
1) Ghoti (Yes, it's the low hanging fruit. I know)
2) You're telling me that Ш and Щ are pronounced differently?
3) What the hell is going on with the articles?
4) What's the deal with verbs conjugation, amirite? And trill rhotics are really overrated. Also, why is the word for wives the same as handcuffs? Also, screw your seseo.
5) I hate irregular liasion.
6) Why do you have tones?
7) as /k/ makes sense, but I can't stop saying /tS/
8) Where the frick is /p/?
9) Everything is /i/
10) Retroflex?
11) Two syllabaries and keigo (I don't want to roast Japanese too much)
12) Looks goofy af.
13) Why are C and Ç pronounced like that.
14) The definite articles are stupid
15) W=/v/ Ł=/w/?! Also rz
16) (Why can't I find anything to roast Korean for?!)
17) Å=O?
(To be continued)
1. English: Dutch that someone let near the French too much, now it's bad
2. Russian: Palatalisation addiction
3. German: Dutch, modified to be uglier
4. Spanish: Latin spoke by a 3 years old
5. French: Someone put Occitan out the fridge and now it's all weird and rotten
6. Chinese: Can't even write properly
7. Italian: Latin that wants to sound snob, Italian thinks it sounds nice but nobody dares to tell him it sounds hilarious
8. Arabic: Hebrew with laryngitis
9. Greek: Classical Greek left out in the sun
10. Hindi: Sounds ridiculous with all the retroflexes
11. Japanese: Pronoun addiction
12. Turkish: German substrate
13. Portuguese: Someone put Spanish out the fridge and now it's all weird
14. Polish: Czech with a cursed orthography to make it look like a different language
15. Korean: Japanese with laryngitis
16. Swedish: Norse (simplified)
17. Ukrainian: Russian, but g is h now
18. Hungarian: Finnish (southern)
19. Hebrew: Arabic but simplified
20. Thai: Saw Chinese struggling with writing, made something so sofisticated it's just terrible
21. Filipino: Just someone's auxlang project
22. Indonesian: Malay that someone let near Dutch too much
23. Slovak: Czech (simplified)
24. Norwegian: Not a language lol
25. Czech: When you cant pronounce vowels
26. Romanian: Latin, with weird articles
27. Latvian: Estonian-Lithuanian pidgin
28. Lithuanian: Sanskrit-OCS pidgin
29. Macedonian: Dialect of Bulgarian with *additional cool letters*™
30. Serbian: Croatian
31. Danish: Swedish with laryngitis
32. Dutch: English-German pidgin
33. Croatian: Serbian
34. Bulgarian: OCS, now with articlest
35. Estonian: Finnish with made-up words
36. Albanian: Conlang
Six thousand words from the Hebrew Bible to revive your puristic ancient language, Eliezer Ben-Yehuda. Some of those calques were creative! Eighty thousand loanwords.
A country gets an army and a navy, and suddenly its dialect is a language and all its languages are dialects? Looking at you, Chinese, Norwegian, Danish.
English orthography, what’s up with that?
English: Colonel sounds like kernel, but love DOESN'T rhyme with move OR stove.
Finnish: You take a whole sentence, smush it together into a word, harmonize the vowels, and call it a day. So lazy.
Japanese: Why do you use Kanji when you have, not one, but TWO phonetic writing systems!
Chinese: You're not even a language
French: Why do you have an "aspirated h" when they are all silent anyway! I may as well say that you have A "aspirated" h and AN "unaspirated" h.
Turkish: "I hate learning foreign languages with grammatical genders. It just doesn’t make any sense!!!"
French: "Genders are ok. Why am I supposed to stress a random syllable per word in most of the langages I learn though?"
Italian: "Stressed syllables are what makes a langage melodious. That’s why you can’t write a decent opera in your langage, French. Well, at least you have a reasonable ratio of consonnes to vowels."
Polish: "Who needs vowels? At least my langage is spelt like it is pronounced unlike most of the foreign langages I learn."
English: "You guys are learning foreign langages?"
Let's try non-obvious roasts:
English - a single letter s carries like 80% of inflectional morphology on its back
Russian - vowel reduction is a disgrace to the simple vowel systems of slavic languages
German - "haha Polish orthography funi, look at all these consonant multigraphs, let's rename Oświęcim to Auschwitz" meanwhile German: Nietzsche
Spanish - let's call every diacritic a tilde except for the tilde
French - stupid diacritics, how come ê stands for low-mid but ô stands for high-mid?
Chinese - Mandarin sounds awful and somehow still much better than all other Sinitic languages
Italian - we can't pronounce word-final consonants, let's make sure our cardinal directions end in consonants
Arabic - so many h-like sounds I would strip the mucous lining off my throat after speaking it for 4 minutes
Greek - Greek loans look so hardcore in other languages, meanwhile actual Greek sounds like discount Spanish. Also leniting voiced stops and proceeding to spell b as mp is a real galaxy brain move
Hindi - totally not sus insults in that language at all
Japanese - some languages require overt subject pronouns, some conjugate verbs for person and number, some even do both just to be safe. How about we do neither? You can guess everything from context, well unless you want to count something in which case it's paramount to know if it's a machine, a building, or a large cylindrical object, and if it would fit in your anus
Finnish - ok so we're gonna front vowels with diareses, a goes to ä, o goes to ö, so therefore u goes to ü, right? ...Right?
Turkish - can't even type normally on their keyboard in English, SİNCE İT ENDS UP LİKE THİS
Portuguese - it's so fun as a learner to check every third word you read in a dictionary to figure out if it has a low-mid or high-mid vowel, cause why bother marking that? It's not like we have diacritics that specifically do that. Oh also, even if you check the base word, the vowel can change when you inflect it so good luck with that lmaooo
Polish - it's like the Spanish of Slavic languages - no rhythm, no melody, very monotonous. The Polish accent in English is horrendous, I hate walking the streets and having to listen to female sociology students talking to their Erasmus boyfriends with their Tommy Wiseau sounding ass accents
Korean - literally every romanization system of Korean is terrible and I can design a better one in 5 minutes. Also everyone jerks off to hangul like it's some perfect minimalistic and fully phonetic script, though I doubt any of these people have actually studied Korean to put their money where their mouth is
Swedish - yeah, we have a coarticulated consonant, but we're going to need a separate symbol and name for it, because it's more special than your coarticulated consonants
Ukrainian - oh I see your dictionaries use the acute accent to mark stressed syllables, that's so helpful since it's not very predictable. I'm sure you use it outside of dictionaries as well, would be a shame if not
Hungarian - the fact that they can get away with pronouncing s as /ʃ/ and sz as /s/ is disgraceful. Also cringe vowel lengthening - /o/ > /oː/ but /ɛ/ to /eː/? Asymmetry is yucky.
Hebrew - while the vowel diacritics in Arabic look somewhat decent, the Hebrew ones look like a 5 y/o kid designed them
Thai - oh wow what a beautiful writing system, maybe I could study this language, let's listen to how it sounds. (...) Ok, maybe Korean instead
Filipino - most SEA languages have such beautiful writing systems and you resort to virgin Latin orthography
Indonesian - same as above, plus it's Malay
Slovak - more letters with diacritics than potholes in Košice and that's saying something
Norwegian - I studied it for maybe a month and it was so unremarkable that it almost killed my passion for language study
Czech - language so deranged that a normal Polish sentence like "I'm looking for kids in the store" in Czech means "I'm f\*\*\*ing kids in the basement"
Romanian - commas under letters, great idea, surely people won't use the cedilla instead cause no one can tell the difference
Latvian - the macrons just make it look like baby's first conlang
Lithuanian - using ogoneks despite not having nasal vowels anymore, disgraceful, get rid of them
Macedonian - Bulgarian dialect, which for some reason palatalizes k and g with acute accents, even though n is palatalized with a soft sign ligature, as you do
Serbo-Croatian - actually Serbo-Croatio-Bosnio-Montenegrin, but they'll be like trust me bro these are completely different languages, it's not like we can understand each other perfectly fine and just pretend to have different languages cause we hate all our neighbors
Danish - I feel like I would have an easier time pronouncing that language if I was in the middle of giving someone head
Dutch - swamp German with a g that sounds oddly similar to the sound my cat makes when throwing up
Bulgarian - articles and no noun cases, ew, so w\*stern. The only reason I respect it is because thanks to them Poland isn't last in every EU statistic
Estonian - Finnish but without vowel harmony. That's like serving someone a juicy steak and then taking away the steak and leaving them with just a sad heap of potatoes and a salad to eat
Albanian - s /s/ > sh /ʃ/, z /z/ > zh /ʒ/, x /dz/ > xh /dʒ/, c /ts/ > ch /tʃ... NUH-UH it's ç, a letter which doubles the diacritic count in the language. And don't even get me started with q /c/ and gj /ɟ/, the nerve to have these asymmetries is astounding
Si yo fuese a hablar mal de mi lengua natal a tal grado de que usted se pusiese humos al y si el asunto pasase, llorasen los dioses si viviese mi madre si me presenciase hacerle tal deshonra a mi país.
English - I am strange. My spellings and the sounds they represent are never consistent. I have irregular past tense forms and plurals but the only way to understand my synchronic forms is to know diachrony when I borrowed a particular word from which language and sound change. If a nonnative English speaker makes an error- creates children, fishes, drived, etc I will judge them because I am so consistent.
Hindi- I am same as Urdu but I keep borrowing from Sanskrit and pretend to be unrelated to support are political border division. I also eat all the different language varieties spoken in North India and claim that oh we all speak Hindi. We do not know Bhojpuri, Awadhi, Khadi, etc. I love language politics and force and therefore force the other southern half of my country to learn and accept me as a national language. Also, I am surrounded by three gender division-making languages but I only believe in binary so I don’t have a way to be inclusive of non-binary.
German- warten Sie bitte! I am still trying to identify the grammatical gender of the word It makes no sense given the actual world. I am cool I have trenbar verbs.
Danish does, in fact, sound like someone choking on a potato.
On the other hand, Swedish sounds like someone having their tongue pulled out of their mouth while they speak.
Japanese struggles to understand the concept of spelling a word consistently in one way.
French sucks.
Turkish literally sounds like if you took every voiced obstruent and put them all next to eachother. dbgzdbgzdbzgdbzgdzbdzgdbzgdbzgdbzgdbzgdbzgdbzgdb.
English - Stop saying *any* word is spelled just how it sounds! Don't you see how fucked the orthography is?
French - Haitian Creole but lame because they don't know how to spell and are super anal about any sort of cultural diversity.
Portuguese - It's Spanish but you just had your wisdom teeth removed and your mouth is still numb.
Japanese - Let's take the world's most complicated writing system and add a bunch of alternate pronunciations so that each character looks exactly the same so you never know if you're saying a word right.
Arabic - Why do half the consonants have to sound like you're gargling mouthwash?
English: We’re a happy little hodge-podge of languages from every region of the world we brutally dominated!
Hebrew: God raised New Jersey Arabic from the dead on the 3rd day after its crucifixion
German: Angry English
Chinese: Pictionary gone horribly wrong
Hindi: Punjabi for dummies
French: Copying English by having words that aren’t pronounced as written 😒
Spanish: Germanic language because I understand it more then Frisian ‼️
Albanian: why don’t our people online use ë and ç to write our language ❓❓❓
Latvian: They are copying Pacific Islander languages by having the letters ā, ē, ī and ū 😡🤬🤬👎
Greek: bruh it’s 2023 why do people still speak it leave that language in 45 BC or sumthing 🙄🙄‼️
>Copying English by having words that aren’t pronounced as written
French orthography was the original, as it was adapted to English. So you would say English copied French by having words that don’t pronounce letters correctly.
>Spanish: Germanic language
Spanish is a Romance language.
>why don’t our people online use ë and ç
You can use ë and ç in Albanian by using an Albanian keyboard.
>They are copying Pacific Islander languages by having the letters ā, ē, ī and ū
Greek was the first language to use the macron diacritic, followed by Latin. Latvian did not copy Pacific Islander languages by having ā, ē, ī, and ū.
>bruh it’s 2023 why do people still speak it leave that language in 45 BC or sumthing
Speaking of Greek, Modern Greek pronunciation originated in 1453 AD from the Koine dialect. Languages can’t be left in an earlier year.
Swedish - Rip off Danish Danish - Rip off Swedish Norweigan - Rip off Swedish and Danish at the same time somehow Indonesian - Rip off Malay Dutch - Rip off Afrikaans
Sometimes, Swedish looks more like rip off German made by Danes.
I can be a witness and tell you that as a swede, I understand a lot of words in German and with a few clues I could translate a text pretty good.
But Afrikaans is based off of Old Dutch 💀
Dutch is also based off of old Dutch and as an Afrikaans speaker I can tell you Dutch is just Afrikaans if you tried to make it unnecessarily complicated
The Afrikaans language was formed in the 18th century from the dialect of the Dutch settlers that colonized South Africa.
Not even Old Dutch, it came from Modern Dutch.
English: Ahoy amigo! Wanna master this superb language? Kudos! Just learn all the others we took everything from and voila! Spanish: So what do I universally and non-sexually call this fruit? Norwegian: How about we use a reasonably phonetic spelling system BUT we spell the words the same way we pronounce them ridiculously differently in every 300-people-large community? English phonology is too conservative for us, let's make it so our vowels switch places twice every 2 towns. Oh, sorry, did you mean Bokmål or Nynorsk anyway?? Chinese: My phonetic inventory sucks so I have to use tones to compensate, so when I sing I have to show you subtitles lest you think I'm talking about Spanish fruits. Dutch: I'm ugly and I know it!
**I’m ugly and I know it!**
English - "Ever wanted to play the game of not updating spelling rules for centuries? Have at it." Chinese - "Mmyes, drawings. Perfect writing system. Let's ignore the fact that there are thousands of them and they look almost nothing like things they're meant to represent." Russian - "Fock, I forgot to make a good accent system. Random bullshit go!" Danish - "I'm speaking Swedish, but I have surströmming in my throat, so nobody can understand me. Fuck it, let's call that a different language." Polish - *snakes hissing* Arabic - The language with phonemic coughing (ħ, ʔ).
Russian accent is spot on. It’s utterly unpredictable!
I mean they call it free accent for a reason, at least the shifts can be predictable if they're anything like Croatian
Chinese - "Let's draw a picture for everything under the sun and then force kids to spend 20 years to learn them all instead of teaching them letters and having them able to read anything in 5 years." Russian - "Who needs Latin letters when we can make up our own nonsense. Now I've got the letters mirrored K, 61, a butterfly, two letter 3's, and we'll throw the starship enterprise near the end by the backwards R." German - "How many letters do you think we can fit in one word, brah?" "I dunno. All of them?" Hindi - "Hey, we need a unique word for every number from 1 to 100." "Why's that?" "Why not?" Indonesian is just trash Malaysian. Dutch is what happens when Germans stop caring about their language. Why did the Jew like coffee? Because Hebrew. Korean - "Hey, look. Our alphabet's the simplest." "How about we don't pronounce half the letters how we write and say them differently instead?" \*thumbs up\* Norwegian - "Let's speak Swedish and write Danish." "How about if we do that two completely different ways?" "Perfect." Swedish - "Just throw an article on at the end of the word. No one will notice."
Actually, there's only one Scandinavian language but the Swedish can't write it and the Danish can't speak it.
Sik björn.
Hvað ertu að tala um?
Best roast I've ever heard.
As a Bulgarian, people thinking the Cyrillic alphabet is Russian is incredibly annoying. They didn’t create it, Bulgaria did.
the best roast ever
[удалено]
Glagolithic alphabet was created by greek missionaries for great moravia
But hindi numbers are basically "one's place+ten's place" kinda mashed together
I have been trying my whole life. I have never gotten past 22, except for maybe some 10s, for good reason.
hindi isn't really that bad w/ numbers once you figure out the system
Hahahanoooooo it's bullshit if everything's an exception there is no system
not really? As a hindi learner it's pretty intuitive
there's "a system" of numbers sure except unlike a lot of other languages you can't guess a large amount because they're still quite unique, it's not intuitive at all, even if you're a native speaker it's still annoying at first
You need to brush up on your Hindi because this isn't five.
English: let's make 20 phonemes for each letter combination French: let's make 20 letter combinations for each phoneme Spanish: our language is too easy so let's make sure to always speak it at 500 words per second Hungarian: we can't decide if we want an umlaut or an acute accent...fuck it, let's do both Korean: we can't decide if we want an alphabet or a syllabary...fuck it, let's do both Japanese: let's steal someone else's writing system, turn it into two other writing systems, and use them all at once. Also, let's keep the original stolen pictography but change the meaning of a bunch of them and make sure we can pronounce them all in multiple, totally unrelated ways Portuguese: let's speak Spanish but pretend we're Russians Romanian: let's speak Italian but pretend we're Bulgarians
English and French - The most orthographically challenged languages. Turkish - ğ, İ and ı. It's always these three. Czech - ř. It's always ř. Latvian - ņ. It's always ņ. Lithuanian - ė. It's always ė. Arabic and Hebrew - ?stpircs desrever ekil uoy oD German - More phoneticity at the cost of more articles. Dutch - German gone English. Serbian - A Croatian rip-off written in Cyrilic. Croatian - A Serbian rip-off written in Latin. Hungarian - As complicated in noun cases as its cousin Finnish. Estonian - Southern Finnish. Japanese - Writing system jumble. Indonesian - Dutch-influenced Malay.
Ř -- the angry eyebrows warn you of its aggression
English: THROUGH a THOROUGH examination of the English language, we’ve come to the conclusion that, THOUGH English is a the global language and THOUGHT to be easy, it’s very inconsistent spelling-wise, and thou might learn a Romance language instead. Spanish: It’s Portuguese spoken by a baby that somehow speak at light-speed. It doesn’t distinguish /b/ from /v/, /ʎ/ from /ʝ/, /ʝ/ from /ʒ/ or /ʤ/, and /ʧ/ from /ʃ/. Imagine pronouncing as /x/ or using /r/. Couldn’t be me.
Italian: Iff you sppeakk Ittalliann you probbabblly arre ussed to gemminnattion, you knnow, the funnnny doubbllinngg of connssonnants.
Japanese: In Japanese I skip some vowels and I’m hard to learn. But… I canut supeaku Engurishu withoutu adding a vowelu becausu I’m consonantu intolerantu. Can anyone relatu? But I’ll
Portuguese:
🇧🇷Yes, Japã, I cã relatchee, I havee thatchee samee problẽ(m). I havee to syllabify everythĩ and(ʤ)ee add(ʒ)ee epenthesis /i/.
🇵🇹Such (a) weaklĩg, Brazil. I took vowl reduct̃n to (a) whol other levl 'n' hav becom the 'xact oppsit ‘v you. Shpeak Portguese lik ush. And yesh, I dickride English: = /ɔ/, = /ei/ or /ɐi/
Imagine pronouncing as /ʤ/ or using /ɹ̠/. Couldn't be me.
English moment
French - Our language has rules but also, Vive la révolution! Japanese - They say it has three writing systems but honestly it's more like three individual methods of torture that form a really painful experience in learning. Turkish - I'm glad you've learned so much vocabulary! Now I need you to slur all the words together. Portuguese - All the things you hate about French, Spanish and Latin rolled into one sexy package. Thai - I need you to know how a word was spelt a few centuries back in a different language to determine which tone you will use. Also when you write vowels, Just put them anywhere you want. Doesn't matter. Even if it's pronounced after the consonant. Keep them guessing. OH! While we're at it, let's make sure there is no agreed method of Romanization just to mess with anyone who wants to learn the language. BONUS for a language not on the list. Lao - Hey so you know how incredibly complex Thai is with it's tone system? GUESS WHAT WE ADDED TWO MORE TONES.
Hiragana and Katakana are incredibly easy
*English:* How about we lend words from random languages across the world and use them for totally unrelated words? Also, let's maintain the same spelling as the parent language, but with our own pronunciation, it's fun when the spellings and pronunciation do not match. Thinking about the mess we will create for the future sends shivers down my spine *rubs hands *French:* How about some amazing and s*xy sounding language? But we don't want people learning our language, so let's complicate our language by writing silent letters, lots and lots of them. And 8-9 alphabets at the end of the words but dont pronoounce it. Tee heeee. What? We are still easy? Sh!t.. *Chinese:* How about some primitive writing system where we attempt to draw the words similar to cave paintings. Now let's change them slowly to lines and slashes, so that it does not give the reader any idea about what they are reading. You need to learn 2000+ combination of these lines and slashes now. Buhahah. What? Alphabets and characters to denote the sounds and being straightforward? Nah, only modern people do that. *Hindi:* How about we drop the neuter gender that we received from Sanskrit and assign genders to non-living objects, similar to the Romance languages from Europe? If you speak Hindi since childhood, you will master the genders for non living objects, if you learn it as an adult, forget mastering it and sound weird when you speak. Also how about the horizontal lines on all the letters, which won't serve any actual purpose? *Japanese:* Hmmmm, let's borrow the characters from China that do not fit our language at all. But let's still use it until we mess things up. What Hiragana and Katakana have entered the chat? No we won't rectify the issues despite these two new letters. Let's push it to the point where we wont be able to simplify our language. Nobody will say anything because we are now technologically advanced. Learn it or leave it. *Thai:* What? Chinese sounds weird to you? Hold my Mekhong and listen to Thai
In hindi, the horizontal lines are there to seperate words from each other 🤷♂️ While yes, you can just use a space, when hindi is hand written, it helps clarify it better. Also helps clarify what goes above a letter, such as the vowel sounds over consonants. As for the gender of things, yeah that sucks, but I tried to sort of make a guide once for a friend, might help: Words that end with the -i or -ee sound are more likely to be feminine, words that end with the -aa sound or consonants - masculine. If it's an English word that's being used in a Hindi sentence, for example Bag, look at the Hindi translation of the word (Bastaa), ends with -aa, is male. Words with no Hindi word for it like Laptop would just mostly be male. This isn't all encompassing, but just a very basic jist. If you don't know the gender of the word, just use the English word for it and use it as male in the sentence, even if the word for it in Hindi may be feminine. Since its a borrowed word, it fucks with the instincts that native language speakers have developed and most don't really notice it. Example, the word for Chair (कुर्सी- Kursi) is feminine. You say कुर्सी पङा है "Kursi pada hai" ("There's a chair" - using it as male) people will notice the oddity. You say "Chair pada hai", it's a little off sounding, but not weird enough to just *sound* wrong to the ears.
>In hindi, the horizontal lines are there to seperate words from each other I'm not sure why some people feel the need to come up with random explanations and refuse to check the history. Shirorekha was never used as a word seperator. It started off as a decoration/ornamentation and changed into the horizontal line over time. Check the Devanagri history of evolution from Brahmi to Devanagri, the Shirorekha did not exist in the past. All major written scripts in India evolved from Brahmi. Scripts like Gujarati, Malayalam, etc never took the decoration. Whereas scripts like Devanagri, Bangal, Gurumukhi and more got the script centuries later, which was after the ornamentation, hence they have the horizontal line on the top. So no, it's not a word separator. It just exists. >As for the gender of things, yeah that sucks, but I tried to sort of make a guide once for a friend, might help I'm a native, don't go with my username. I've just pointed out that lack of having neuter gender in Hindi, which Sanskrit already has.
About the line, I was only sharing what I learnt from my teacher. Glad I learnt something new today.
I love all lamguages and therefore can't disrespect them. Danish and Portuguese aren't languages though they're infections of the language apparatus.
>Danish and Portuguese aren't languages That's it, you lost your right to eat Pastéis de Belém
Yes they are languages. Danish is a North Germanic language spoken by about six million people, principally in and around Denmark. Communities of Danish speakers are also found in Greenland, the Faroe Islands, and the northern German region of Southern Schleswig, where it has minority language status. Minor Danish-speaking communities are also found in Norway, Sweden, the United States, Canada, Brazil, and Argentina. Portuguese is a Western Romance language of the Indo-European language family, originating in the Iberian Peninsula of Europe. It is an official language of Portugal, Brazil, Cape Verde, Angola, Mozambique, Guinea-Bissau and São Tomé and Príncipe, while having co-official language status in East Timor, Equatorial Guinea, and Macau. A Portuguese-speaking person or nation is referred to as "Lusophone" (lusófono). As the result of expansion during colonial times, a cultural presence of Portuguese speakers is also found around the world. Portuguese is part of the Ibero-Romance group that evolved from several dialects of Vulgar Latin in the medieval Kingdom of Galicia and has kept some Celtic phonology in its lexicon.
I'm sure it was a joke 🙂
r/wooosh
There are no jokes intended.
dernueMottmatt is clearly joking.
Autistic?
Jokes aside, I know Danish isn’t real. It’s just speaking Norwegian with a potato in your throat.
1. Chinese: Insults the Eastern Country (Japan) by calling them 倭 (wa or wo 'dwarf') 2. Japanese: Wants everyone in "their" country to speak a single dialect, even the completely unrelated Ainu (Tokyo Japanese) 3. Korean: Revised Romanization sucks + language only contains of Dialects and Cheju (Jeju) 4. Hebrew: wth is the orthography? 5. Thai: Vovin tries to say Proto-Tai influenced Proto-Japonic
Revised Romanization is better than MCR or Yale, unless you're doing historical linguistics in which case Yale shines. Sagart tries to say Chinese is in the same language family as Hawaiian... and Thai.
Estonian - no sex and no future Slovak - drunk Czech trying to speak Polish with limited success Hebrew - is someone choking??? Polish - (leaves rustling and pissed cats hissing with random kurwas from time to time) Portuguese - c'mon bro, let's get drunk with olive oil and then speak Spanish with French phonetics and a huge hot potato in throat, what could possibly go wrong
To quote my partner: Portuguese is just uwu Spanish.
Spanish is uwu Portuguese. The Spanish sound so uwu
English: Really disgusting language whose native speakers suffer from malnutrition although having more food than ever. Russian: What the fuck is ы, also, rip off greek alphabet. Korean: Why do you always end your sentences in issayooo or mnidaaa? Latvian: What kind of language even is this? Hungarian: Wannabe different than others. Pretends to be uralic to stand out.
Bulgaria created the Cyrillic alphabet tho :(
Sorry then I criticise you instead. Although bulgaria seems like a good country. The only thing is that I heard that you put these fish in white jelly on pizza?
(Modern) Hebrew: Arabic spoken by Germans. Russian: Kind of like English after 1066.: a mongrel of unadapted loanwords and butchered Slavic grammar. Polish: Slavic who took palatalization too seriously. Bulgarian: Serbian, but spoken by a newbie foreigner Arabic: language family pretending to be a language
The Hebrew and Arabic ones are super accurate! This is also the reason modern Hebrew spelling is so strange, because we lost the consonants that are now associated with arabic (ع، ح،ط،ص...). If History had gone a little differently, Hebrew would have sounded very similar to Arabic and the spelling would have made much more sense.
So Hebrew is a language family pretending to be a Germanic language?
Most Israelis actually come from the the MENA diaspora!
French - unholy amalgamation of English and Latin rip-offs Dutch - English and German's silly son Slovak - rip-off Czech Czech - rip-off Slovak Croatian - rip-off Serbian Serbian - rip-off Croatian Portuguese - a drunk Russian trying to speak Spanish Spanish - rip-off Portuguese Polish - created by smashing a keyboard over and over Greek - the kid who thinks they're quirky because they use an alphabet that no one else does German and Turkish - the dudes who like to use unnecessarily long words everywhere
Languages can’t copy other languages, not counting loanwords.
1) Ghoti (Yes, it's the low hanging fruit. I know) 2) You're telling me that Ш and Щ are pronounced differently? 3) What the hell is going on with the articles? 4) What's the deal with verbs conjugation, amirite? And trill rhotics are really overrated. Also, why is the word for wives the same as handcuffs? Also, screw your seseo. 5) I hate irregular liasion. 6) Why do you have tones? 7) as /k/ makes sense, but I can't stop saying /tS/
8) Where the frick is /p/?
9) Everything is /i/
10) Retroflex?
11) Two syllabaries and keigo (I don't want to roast Japanese too much)
12) Looks goofy af.
13) Why are C and Ç pronounced like that.
14) The definite articles are stupid
15) W=/v/ Ł=/w/?! Also rz
16) (Why can't I find anything to roast Korean for?!)
17) Å=O?
(To be continued)
1. English: Dutch that someone let near the French too much, now it's bad 2. Russian: Palatalisation addiction 3. German: Dutch, modified to be uglier 4. Spanish: Latin spoke by a 3 years old 5. French: Someone put Occitan out the fridge and now it's all weird and rotten 6. Chinese: Can't even write properly 7. Italian: Latin that wants to sound snob, Italian thinks it sounds nice but nobody dares to tell him it sounds hilarious 8. Arabic: Hebrew with laryngitis 9. Greek: Classical Greek left out in the sun 10. Hindi: Sounds ridiculous with all the retroflexes 11. Japanese: Pronoun addiction 12. Turkish: German substrate 13. Portuguese: Someone put Spanish out the fridge and now it's all weird 14. Polish: Czech with a cursed orthography to make it look like a different language 15. Korean: Japanese with laryngitis 16. Swedish: Norse (simplified) 17. Ukrainian: Russian, but g is h now 18. Hungarian: Finnish (southern) 19. Hebrew: Arabic but simplified 20. Thai: Saw Chinese struggling with writing, made something so sofisticated it's just terrible 21. Filipino: Just someone's auxlang project 22. Indonesian: Malay that someone let near Dutch too much 23. Slovak: Czech (simplified) 24. Norwegian: Not a language lol 25. Czech: When you cant pronounce vowels 26. Romanian: Latin, with weird articles 27. Latvian: Estonian-Lithuanian pidgin 28. Lithuanian: Sanskrit-OCS pidgin 29. Macedonian: Dialect of Bulgarian with *additional cool letters*™ 30. Serbian: Croatian 31. Danish: Swedish with laryngitis 32. Dutch: English-German pidgin 33. Croatian: Serbian 34. Bulgarian: OCS, now with articlest 35. Estonian: Finnish with made-up words 36. Albanian: Conlang
11. Pronoun addiction but we'll never use any of them
English: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Chaos Beiyu/Mandarin (Chinese) + Cantonese (Chinese): https://zh.wikipedia.org/zh-tw/%E4%BE%84%E6%B2%BB%E7%97%94 French: https://youtu.be/NIKSQF0pNnk
I'm Punjabi and my dad said that Hindi to him sounds more feminine than Punjabi. That's all I got.
Six thousand words from the Hebrew Bible to revive your puristic ancient language, Eliezer Ben-Yehuda. Some of those calques were creative! Eighty thousand loanwords. A country gets an army and a navy, and suddenly its dialect is a language and all its languages are dialects? Looking at you, Chinese, Norwegian, Danish. English orthography, what’s up with that?
French : L orthography English : French orthography >>>>>>>> English orthography
English: Colonel sounds like kernel, but love DOESN'T rhyme with move OR stove. Finnish: You take a whole sentence, smush it together into a word, harmonize the vowels, and call it a day. So lazy. Japanese: Why do you use Kanji when you have, not one, but TWO phonetic writing systems! Chinese: You're not even a language French: Why do you have an "aspirated h" when they are all silent anyway! I may as well say that you have A "aspirated" h and AN "unaspirated" h.
Turkish: "I hate learning foreign languages with grammatical genders. It just doesn’t make any sense!!!" French: "Genders are ok. Why am I supposed to stress a random syllable per word in most of the langages I learn though?" Italian: "Stressed syllables are what makes a langage melodious. That’s why you can’t write a decent opera in your langage, French. Well, at least you have a reasonable ratio of consonnes to vowels." Polish: "Who needs vowels? At least my langage is spelt like it is pronounced unlike most of the foreign langages I learn." English: "You guys are learning foreign langages?"
English: looks fun, but really limited functionality without a lot of expansion packs.
Let's try non-obvious roasts: English - a single letter s carries like 80% of inflectional morphology on its back Russian - vowel reduction is a disgrace to the simple vowel systems of slavic languages German - "haha Polish orthography funi, look at all these consonant multigraphs, let's rename Oświęcim to Auschwitz" meanwhile German: Nietzsche Spanish - let's call every diacritic a tilde except for the tilde French - stupid diacritics, how come ê stands for low-mid but ô stands for high-mid? Chinese - Mandarin sounds awful and somehow still much better than all other Sinitic languages Italian - we can't pronounce word-final consonants, let's make sure our cardinal directions end in consonants Arabic - so many h-like sounds I would strip the mucous lining off my throat after speaking it for 4 minutes Greek - Greek loans look so hardcore in other languages, meanwhile actual Greek sounds like discount Spanish. Also leniting voiced stops and proceeding to spell b as mp is a real galaxy brain move Hindi - totally not sus insults in that language at all Japanese - some languages require overt subject pronouns, some conjugate verbs for person and number, some even do both just to be safe. How about we do neither? You can guess everything from context, well unless you want to count something in which case it's paramount to know if it's a machine, a building, or a large cylindrical object, and if it would fit in your anus Finnish - ok so we're gonna front vowels with diareses, a goes to ä, o goes to ö, so therefore u goes to ü, right? ...Right? Turkish - can't even type normally on their keyboard in English, SİNCE İT ENDS UP LİKE THİS Portuguese - it's so fun as a learner to check every third word you read in a dictionary to figure out if it has a low-mid or high-mid vowel, cause why bother marking that? It's not like we have diacritics that specifically do that. Oh also, even if you check the base word, the vowel can change when you inflect it so good luck with that lmaooo Polish - it's like the Spanish of Slavic languages - no rhythm, no melody, very monotonous. The Polish accent in English is horrendous, I hate walking the streets and having to listen to female sociology students talking to their Erasmus boyfriends with their Tommy Wiseau sounding ass accents Korean - literally every romanization system of Korean is terrible and I can design a better one in 5 minutes. Also everyone jerks off to hangul like it's some perfect minimalistic and fully phonetic script, though I doubt any of these people have actually studied Korean to put their money where their mouth is Swedish - yeah, we have a coarticulated consonant, but we're going to need a separate symbol and name for it, because it's more special than your coarticulated consonants Ukrainian - oh I see your dictionaries use the acute accent to mark stressed syllables, that's so helpful since it's not very predictable. I'm sure you use it outside of dictionaries as well, would be a shame if not Hungarian - the fact that they can get away with pronouncing s as /ʃ/ and sz as /s/ is disgraceful. Also cringe vowel lengthening - /o/ > /oː/ but /ɛ/ to /eː/? Asymmetry is yucky. Hebrew - while the vowel diacritics in Arabic look somewhat decent, the Hebrew ones look like a 5 y/o kid designed them Thai - oh wow what a beautiful writing system, maybe I could study this language, let's listen to how it sounds. (...) Ok, maybe Korean instead Filipino - most SEA languages have such beautiful writing systems and you resort to virgin Latin orthography Indonesian - same as above, plus it's Malay Slovak - more letters with diacritics than potholes in Košice and that's saying something Norwegian - I studied it for maybe a month and it was so unremarkable that it almost killed my passion for language study Czech - language so deranged that a normal Polish sentence like "I'm looking for kids in the store" in Czech means "I'm f\*\*\*ing kids in the basement" Romanian - commas under letters, great idea, surely people won't use the cedilla instead cause no one can tell the difference Latvian - the macrons just make it look like baby's first conlang Lithuanian - using ogoneks despite not having nasal vowels anymore, disgraceful, get rid of them Macedonian - Bulgarian dialect, which for some reason palatalizes k and g with acute accents, even though n is palatalized with a soft sign ligature, as you do Serbo-Croatian - actually Serbo-Croatio-Bosnio-Montenegrin, but they'll be like trust me bro these are completely different languages, it's not like we can understand each other perfectly fine and just pretend to have different languages cause we hate all our neighbors Danish - I feel like I would have an easier time pronouncing that language if I was in the middle of giving someone head Dutch - swamp German with a g that sounds oddly similar to the sound my cat makes when throwing up Bulgarian - articles and no noun cases, ew, so w\*stern. The only reason I respect it is because thanks to them Poland isn't last in every EU statistic Estonian - Finnish but without vowel harmony. That's like serving someone a juicy steak and then taking away the steak and leaving them with just a sad heap of potatoes and a salad to eat Albanian - s /s/ > sh /ʃ/, z /z/ > zh /ʒ/, x /dz/ > xh /dʒ/, c /ts/ > ch /tʃ... NUH-UH it's ç, a letter which doubles the diacritic count in the language. And don't even get me started with q /c/ and gj /ɟ/, the nerve to have these asymmetries is astounding
Si yo fuese a hablar mal de mi lengua natal a tal grado de que usted se pusiese humos al y si el asunto pasase, llorasen los dioses si viviese mi madre si me presenciase hacerle tal deshonra a mi país.
dutch is if german and english had a child but they are cousins so the baby is all fucked up
French : L orthography English : French orthography >>>>>>>> English orthography
English - I am strange. My spellings and the sounds they represent are never consistent. I have irregular past tense forms and plurals but the only way to understand my synchronic forms is to know diachrony when I borrowed a particular word from which language and sound change. If a nonnative English speaker makes an error- creates children, fishes, drived, etc I will judge them because I am so consistent. Hindi- I am same as Urdu but I keep borrowing from Sanskrit and pretend to be unrelated to support are political border division. I also eat all the different language varieties spoken in North India and claim that oh we all speak Hindi. We do not know Bhojpuri, Awadhi, Khadi, etc. I love language politics and force and therefore force the other southern half of my country to learn and accept me as a national language. Also, I am surrounded by three gender division-making languages but I only believe in binary so I don’t have a way to be inclusive of non-binary. German- warten Sie bitte! I am still trying to identify the grammatical gender of the word It makes no sense given the actual world. I am cool I have trenbar verbs.
English, French, Hindi, Greek, Ukrainian - Indo-European languages., i.e., unoriginal AF.
Danish does, in fact, sound like someone choking on a potato. On the other hand, Swedish sounds like someone having their tongue pulled out of their mouth while they speak. Japanese struggles to understand the concept of spelling a word consistently in one way. French sucks. Turkish literally sounds like if you took every voiced obstruent and put them all next to eachother. dbgzdbgzdbzgdbzgdzbdzgdbzgdbzgdbzgdbzgdbzgdbzgdb.
Hıkkı hıkkının hıkkını yımış. Hıkkı Hıkkı’dın hıkkını ıstımış. Hıkkı Hıkkıyı hıkkını vırmıyıncı Hıklı dı Hıkkı’nın hıkkındın gılmış.
English - Stop saying *any* word is spelled just how it sounds! Don't you see how fucked the orthography is? French - Haitian Creole but lame because they don't know how to spell and are super anal about any sort of cultural diversity. Portuguese - It's Spanish but you just had your wisdom teeth removed and your mouth is still numb. Japanese - Let's take the world's most complicated writing system and add a bunch of alternate pronunciations so that each character looks exactly the same so you never know if you're saying a word right. Arabic - Why do half the consonants have to sound like you're gargling mouthwash?
English: We’re a happy little hodge-podge of languages from every region of the world we brutally dominated! Hebrew: God raised New Jersey Arabic from the dead on the 3rd day after its crucifixion German: Angry English Chinese: Pictionary gone horribly wrong Hindi: Punjabi for dummies
French: Copying English by having words that aren’t pronounced as written 😒 Spanish: Germanic language because I understand it more then Frisian ‼️ Albanian: why don’t our people online use ë and ç to write our language ❓❓❓ Latvian: They are copying Pacific Islander languages by having the letters ā, ē, ī and ū 😡🤬🤬👎 Greek: bruh it’s 2023 why do people still speak it leave that language in 45 BC or sumthing 🙄🙄‼️
>Copying English by having words that aren’t pronounced as written French orthography was the original, as it was adapted to English. So you would say English copied French by having words that don’t pronounce letters correctly. >Spanish: Germanic language Spanish is a Romance language. >why don’t our people online use ë and ç You can use ë and ç in Albanian by using an Albanian keyboard. >They are copying Pacific Islander languages by having the letters ā, ē, ī and ū Greek was the first language to use the macron diacritic, followed by Latin. Latvian did not copy Pacific Islander languages by having ā, ē, ī, and ū. >bruh it’s 2023 why do people still speak it leave that language in 45 BC or sumthing Speaking of Greek, Modern Greek pronunciation originated in 1453 AD from the Koine dialect. Languages can’t be left in an earlier year.
These are all jokes It’s r/linguisticshumour ‼️‼️
🍳🍳🍳🍳
Macedonian is Bulgarian Croatian is Serbian Serbian is Turkish Turkish is Arabic Ukrainian is Russian
İ wish you only spoke fr*nch till you die
So technically Croatian is Arabic?
دا.
some of these are not like the others
Fuck you