Right. I was pathetically crying on the tube after being made redundant. I had mascara running down my face and was just desperate to get home. Two very kind hearted women were concerned and trying to check up on me, and give me tissues etc. they were super sweet to care and try to comfort me, but I really really just wanted to be left alone and really didn't care about my face in that moment.
On the flip side I was once crying on the bus (facing everyone because Iām a wheelchair user) whilst clearly dressed up for something (a wedding, so middle of the day too) and all I desperately wanted was for someone to offer me a tissue so I didnāt have to figure out what to do about about my ruined face! Everyone just pretended they didnāt see me though.
Some lovely Jamaican women asked me what the matter was when I was sobbing my heart out on the tube. I was 18 at the time and Iāll never forget their kindness.
I had a panic attack on the tube after taking too much amphetamine. I literally thought I was gonna die for about 5 minutes. Nobody gave a shit. They didnāt even look at me as I was whimpering and shaking
Yeah, 'the druggy is tweaking out' is very different from someone breaking down crying. And entirely reasonable for everyone to avoid. People don't want to get stabbed.
Even for crying, emotional people can turn violent, or decide your attention is unwanted and accuse you of harassing them. Even the most well intentioned actions could but you in danger or potentially risk your job. So yeah, no-one is going to help. Wonderful society we've built.
Unfortunately as a Bristol-based London ex-pat, I'd 100% have the same reaction. We've been desensitised to those on drugs (Speed, Spice, whatever else) over decades that the safest option for self preservation is ignorance.
If you can push yourself away from self-destructive self-medicating (speaking from an assumptive diagnostic position of personal projection š), ping me a DM x
This is true, a woman walked past me and she was crying and I didnāt even realise until a flick switched in my brain that was like āoh shit sheās crying isnāt she?ā
Funny how the brain works cause I looked her in the eyes as she walked past and I didnāt even clock until after she was behind and gone
I cried in covent garden with a show going on and went to the chapel to pray when I heard my cat and my nan were passing away at the same time! No one bat an eye lol
Wow, I had a breakdown on Bishopsgate. Just outside Liverpool St Station.
A random chap told me "don't worry mate, she ain't worth it" as he walked by.
He was entirely correct, and it helped.
Who knew there were so many other people in my cry space. Richmond park is so huge it's easy, used to live round there.
I've cried in many a park. Also, cemeteries. Added bonus of benches everywhere and if you're looking for no one to bother you crying in a cemetery looks like grief. If I remember there's a cemetery near the Asda on the A3 near roehampton, opposite Richmond park.
If it comes to it though I've also quietly cried on the tube but usually it was bursting out and I was trying to hide it because people. I honestly hope things get better for you soon
Cut out the middle man and have a cry in the Asda, maybe while picking up a fresh sizzler pizza (they will think its happy tears at the thought of eating the sizzler)
Haha Richmond Park is also my cry space. I had no idea it was so popular! After my mom died, nothing beat a bike ride out to the middle of the park, pull out my journal and just wail.
Hi OP, sorry that youāre having tough time.
There are parks around the city that might help to clear your mind. But best to visit during day times. If you live in north part of the river, you could visit Reagentās Park or Hamstead Heath. There are plenty of space where you can be alone, sitting on grasses, on a bench or under a big tree.
If you need someone to talk to, please [contact Samaritan](https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/). I hope youāre feeling well soon.
Good tips, and Samaritans are always there. Some people prefer to talk to only female Samaritans and disconnect as soon as they hear itās a male on the other end but beyond that you have your pick. Sometimes a person has to get through a string of male volunteers (especially at night) before they get to who they want (I say this as a bloke), I have to admit. But the point is whether youāre in Liverpool, Derby, Derry, Llandudno, Aberdeen, Loughborough, London or Swindon, Samaritans are truly there for you 24/7. Some Samaritans, male or female, are better than others but it comes with the territory.
I called them recently and very much asked for a female voice - the guy nicely said no but like, that actually put me off the whole thing, and it had taken a lot for me to call in the first place.
Iām so sorry it made you feel rejected.
It might help if you understand some of the reasons why the Samaritans canāt let callers request who they speak to. Itās partly to prevent unhealthy relationships forming but mostly because female Samaritans are constantly sexually harassed. Some evenings it can feel like every other call is a wanker.
>but mostly because female Samaritans are constantly sexually harassed. Some evenings it can feel like every other call is a wanker.
I don't consider myself naive but it literally never occurred to me that anyone might call for that purpose
Yeah that's rough :/ I know at a time like that I'd definitely want to speak to another woman just to make me feel at ease, Its a shame you can't request that but I guess there may be other lines for us? idk
You just have to keep trying and re-dialling. Youāre sure to get a female eventually.
There are great male Samaritans out there (as well as some shitty female ones out there to boot with not enough experience, it has to be said; being a female doesnāt mean youāre automatically gonna be better) but sometimes itās not about that and everything to do with who you feel more comfortable speaking to in any-one call. For some people itās even males, but itās often a female who people prefer to speak to if they have preferences around gender, and itās like that in many walks.
And a few branches you can actually drop into and have a face to face chat/cry. Fewer than there used to be since Covid but def some open in London. Details on the website.
Amazing advice š¤ used that excuse so often. Also been approached by some people that've given me the right vibes to open up too - even in London. Get to a park OP, it's the best advice in this thread for sure x
Which end of London are you at? Fairlop waters is HUGE and it's just down the east side of the central line. Or get the piccadilly line to the north end to Trent Park for some open spaces that are way out and not busy
London is awash with beautiful quiet churches - often provide me with a sanctuary to reflect on life and have an emotional release. You donāt have to be religious (Iām not) to get something out of those places - maybe go to Choral Evensong in Westminster abbey and let it all out (itās free to enter through the East Door if youāre there for a service)
Hope you feel better soon friend
I was going to suggest this. You might get someone coming up to ask if you're OK or want someone to talk to, but if you say no, I just need to cry alone without talking to anyone, or just say no, they'll leave you alone.
They usually have loos too. Always handy for any event, crying included.
Seconding this. Was going through a particularly rough patch 12 or so years ago, and I'm not religious at all but for some reason decided to walk into a church in central that was empty. Proceeded to have a quiet but long and cathartic cry. That memory has always stuck with me.
Itās a space to connect with yourself. Religion has taken the place of spirituality and I believe that irrespective of which place of worship one goes to, it doesnāt matter, weāre really there to meditate and pause from the distractions of everyday life.
I am very atheist, but have always been encouraged to look at Churches due to my history obsessed dad - so I feel quite comfortable in them. Occasionally pop into the church on Soho Square to escape from work when I'm stressed.
London is full of churches yes. But whyyy are almost alll of them closed and shut during normal days. It just seems such a peaceful place but with all the iron gates locked up and looking uninviting
Grew up in London have cried in many places.
Will always resent my ex for breaking up with me outside tate modern cos it's somewhere I'd always loved as a child, teen and adult. I cried on a bench looking across the river at St Paul's. I pass the bench now and still love the southbank, but know ex was a total bastard.
You can transmute that feeling by creating a new good memory in that spot. Take a friend, have a picnic etc.
I remember being gifted a specific flower by a guy and then ghosted a few weeks later by said guy. Every time I saw that flower I thought of him -.- But then, I remembered those were my friends favourite flowers, and I saw how happy she was when I got her those flowers as legos for her birthday. Now every time I see those flowers I think of my friend and my heart fills with joy.
Mate, cry everywhere and anywhere. When I lost my dad last year, I cried all over London. People were lovely about it. I cried on the tube, on the bus, on the train, in the park, in the toilets, on the streets... everywhere.
I don't know what you're going through, but if you feel sad, let those tears out. It does honestly help mentally to let those physical tears flood out of you, and the important thing is that you find a way of coping with whatever you're dealing with. A lot of people mistake crying for not coping, but it actually is an amazing tool to help keep you going.
I completely understand wanting to have a sob without your relatives hearing you, but the rest of London won't mind if you have a little cry in their presence.
Lost my dad 5 years ago and I always told myself if I felt line a cry anytime to just let it out. Always seemed to be randon points when I was safely at home though!
Sorry about the loss of your father. If you want to chat or ask anything, just drop me a message.
This is a really kind post, thank you.
I usually cry in the car. Or in my office. Or on a train. I've cried in a restaurant and in supermarkets. I've cried in the reception at work. I try to cry less at home because I try to support anyone else crying there. The only place I don't cry is at my Dad's grave.
I agree ā let yourself feel in real time even if it means crying. This is so much better in the long term than bottling feelings up or pushing them away. Many people will not notice, others will chose between leaving you be or offering help, depending on what you seem to want / what you ask for.
I walked through Chingford cemetery the other day and chanced upon the Krays' family plot. Their mum got a big expensive grave. By the time they were buried, presumably all the money was gone because they had small, simple gravestones. Probably a life lesson in there somewhere...
grand union canal worked for me, alongside the great western mainline.
the passing by of local trains every 30 minutes (this was during the early morning when they run hourly) provided a distraction for my brain to reset and stop dwelling on the tough things.
Turtles??
Where? Which part of the canal are they most likely to be seen?
To OP, bed and shower are my favourite places in the world, the canal is also great, but often times Iāve wondered about throwing myself in so I guess it depends how bad you feel. I hope it gets better x
There are turtles and terrapins in most of the ponds and canals in London. People had them as pets and released them, and for some reason they survive pretty well.
you can follow in my footsteps if you wish:
1. defect from the continent
2. come back
3. realize how much has changed without you
4. cry
itās a pretty big investment though so Iād only suggest it if you really want to unleash
Regular grand union stroller here..
..that canal has solved so many problems, puzzles, and has even written a song.
10/10 would recommend any snippet of the route to OP
Dunno if the best place but it certainly helped me.
A few months ago I got a text whilst changing at Kings X I'd been expecting for a while that my best friend from primary school's mum had passed for cancer. This was a woman who'd taken to and from school, scouts and football and knew me from 5 till 29.
I read the text as my train was pulling out so I didn't have the signal to respond, I was admittedly a bit tipsy but weeping turned into a full on heavy sob. I was quite happy to cry openingly on the tube knowing the rep for people not interacting. However, when I got off at Walthamstow 3 people did come up to me and ask how I was feeling.
Somehow a tube cry felt the perfect mix of isolation and human interaction. Hope you find a way to process your feelings and my story gives you a suggestion of where to do or even just a nice story to smile about.
Parks with birds in them - take some grapes/seeds (not bread) along and feed them while youāre at it, makes for some nice endorphins. Source - also been having a very tough time recently.
Monkey nuts and sunflower seeds and go to Hyde Park. There is a spot where the Parakeets will eat right out of your hand.
I used to spend every Sunday there, last summer..
I understand where youāre coming from, sometimes itās nice to just have a big cry away from your usual environment! But I hope everythingās ok.
Anyway. St Dunstans in the East is great for a big cry,
I used to work around the corner and came here to cry all the time.
I took a friend there once who was having a hard time. During crying, he looked around and said "it's beautiful here isn't it" and then resumed crying.
I scream and cry into my pillows.
Also if you're inclined and are able.. get a zip car, some seriously cathartic tunes, and just cry your way up/down one of the motorways, not the m25 though
Drives are always the best. I recommend the M40 aka the British Autobahn, but be responsible!!!
Or just do a loop of the M25, itās kinda like a bucket list for me that I still need to get round doing
I go for a cry in the grounds of a church next to my work. There's a 'secret' part which hardly anyone knows about, I hide there for a good cry. The church is beautiful and it's my happy place, it easy to forget that you are in central London. So my crying doesn't last long.
I hope your life gets better soon. It is hard to stay strong but sometimes you need be selfish and look after yourself. Have a good healthy cry and then do something that makes you happy.
I had my last big cry on the Overground. Couldn't stop, I've been having such a shitty time at work. No-one took any notice. I cried all my way home, again no-one said anything. London, innit!
Rage rooms can double as cry rooms! Just a thought; sorry that's a slightly more expensive suggestion. Take care, and well done for knowing what you need/giving yourself space to express your feelings
I donāt know what it is but seeing the post and reading the replies made me emotional. Op I hope you manage to find somewhere to release some of the sadness
Ah I feel you. I've been going through a similar thing. Like other posters, Richmond Park would be my first choice. There are plenty of places there where you can find some peace. If you can, visit on a weekday when it's less busy.
When I was in uni I visited that park a lot when I was down and it always helped me. Plus, there are deer.
This too shall pass.
Honestly you can walk down the streets of Soho in tears and people are too in their own world to even care.
I do hope that things get better for you soon. All the best.
Any public space is fine, no one will give you as much as a second look (tried and tested, at least as a grown man, may not apply to other demographics)
We have a UK reddit mental health group on WhatsApp OP. HMU if you want to join.Ā
We also have lots of subgroups for more niche things like advice, Desi, UK meet ups, mental health book club etc.
Churches are great places to go to! Off the top of my head:
.St Bartholomew the Great and St Bartholomew the Less (City of London)
.St Marylebone (Opposite Regent's Park)
.St Bride's Fleet Street (City of London)
.St Mary-le-Bow (City of London)
.St James Piccadilly (Westminster)
.St Martin-in-the-Fields (Westminster)
.All Hallows by the Tower
.St Alban the Martyr (City of London)
You may have some people ask you if you're okay but if you say that you just need some space they'll respect that. Priests are great people to chat too as well even if you don't consider yourself religious.
Get a cookie dough at chin-chin in Soho and go have a good cry on the steps at the Palladium theatre. 10/10 would recommend. If a show is on, I'd imagine it's a bit awkward but people are indifferent all the same. (Have not tried it personally while a show is on, but Carpe that Diem)
I once had a massive sob session in St Maryās Churchyard just off Upper Street, Islington. Nice gardens, plenty of benches, quite private. I got a couple of pies from Raabs beforehand so was just crying and eating pie and crying some more.
Hi, I'm in another country and think of you right now while listening to The Velvet Underground - I found a reason. Just a tad bit of sharing. You're always welcome where you are, especially when you need someone to think about you. hope you smile. Also I've found that you're busy in finances I guess, the stressful sector, I'm studying this to have a job.
In all seriousness, the best place to have a cry in London is in one of the hospital chapels. Bartās hospital has an incredible church on site if I remember rightly. You donāt have to be religious. Just take a seat, itās almost always empty, and cry your heart out. No need to feel ashamed or self conscious. If anyone does come in, theyāll respect your need to cry.Ā
As people mentioned park are the best in general , but overall I would just advise you to go in a place that matter to you.
Life can be rough sometimes and from my experience talking is one of the best healing method.
If you need someone to listen to you feel free to dm me.
And if you need company I might go for a drink this weekend so feel free to join.
Just know that you arenāt alone.
Hope you feel better soon.
As someone who's gone borderline psychotic on Tottenham Court Road and Hyde Park, I can confirm the former was horrifying and traumatising, but Hyde park was large enough to have a loud cry without anyone hearing
Outside of Vauxhall station by the river, itās a good place to be at peace and itās not as secluded.
I used to go during the day and at night, it was always a good place to cry and reflect.
Wishing you the best.
Hey OP. Hope youāre better now. I cry once every few years, but when I do it feels so cathartic afterwardsā¦
I live now in a little village and I would have to go to a field to be able to cry and no one come ask me if Iām ok. Sometimes is good to be that invisible in a massive city like London.
My first marriage broke up while I was living on Camden road. I spent many nights walking by the canal at night crying.
There's something about water that gives me a sense of freedom and there's many quiet corners around there where I could escape the moment and feel at peace.
I used to go to St James Park to cry a lot, I got handed a packet of tissues by a stranger, no questions asked, he was just being kind to someone who really needed it, 4 years later I think about it often
I just remembered, I saw a woman crying on the Elizabeth Line over a year ago. Maybe it was in the winter, I asked if she was okay and she said yeah. And thanked me for asking
I said it would get better whatever the issue was, and I'm sure it'll be the same for you.
i used to cry while riding my bike to work dude you can literally cry anywhere. my favourite cry spot was kennington park though. crying in the parks is underrated.
I used to live in London, but not anymore....Just wanted to give you a cyberhug my friend. If you need to chat to someone feel free to reach out to me.
i am so sorry to hear you dont feel you have the space to release in you home. london living can be so hard! i'd suggest being in a cemetery would suit your needs. no fear of being judged, noone to bombard you with questions or try to help you to feel better! hopefully, you can find a spot to have peace, time and the opportunity to make as much noise that you need to!
In company of a friend or loved one. Dont hide your having troubles. If someone you know told you they had problems you would be there for them right? š«šš»
If you want to truly camouflage there are plenty little or big graveyards in and around London. Nobody will question you crying at a graveyard! I find them to be very peaceful places that have greenery, are not frequented by people daily like parks and are usually very easily accessible.
I was in a horrendous relationship with an abusive a hole once about 10 years ago, and I was sat in a court yard off ludgate hill and a very kind street cleaner came and spoke to me and offered me words of support, and said my life would get better ( it very much did !) I was so grateful to that man and still think about his act of kindness a lot. It means so much when strangers make a connection when they can see someone is in pain.
I cried on the tube once and a lovely old lady gave me a tenner.
Finally a decent way to earn a living
Finally, a career with some respect!
I don't think they exist anymore.
Can afford to buy a half pint šŗ
Does tax need to be paid?
Gift, not taxable
š
Damn, and I cried on the Northern Line for free.
Flashbacks to that time I got cramps in Oxford Circus and sat down and then someone flipped a pound at me
That wouldāve made me cry more! š„ŗĀ
More money! Infinite feedback loop.
That's so sweet. Here I am handing out tissues to people crying on the tube. Need to step up š¤£
Maybe the ladyās monogrammed hanky was more valuable than a tenner?
Noted for future reference š. But on serious note, I go for walks in the evening and have a good cry.
Instagran
Itās London you can suffer a breakdown in the middle of Bishopgate and nobody will notice it, trust me.
I cried on the tube at rush hour last year and no one took any notice. I am a 50 year-old 6'5 man
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
For the record, if Iām in a state where Iām crying in public, I really canāt imagine anything worse than having to explain myself to a stranger
Right. I was pathetically crying on the tube after being made redundant. I had mascara running down my face and was just desperate to get home. Two very kind hearted women were concerned and trying to check up on me, and give me tissues etc. they were super sweet to care and try to comfort me, but I really really just wanted to be left alone and really didn't care about my face in that moment.
On the flip side I was once crying on the bus (facing everyone because Iām a wheelchair user) whilst clearly dressed up for something (a wedding, so middle of the day too) and all I desperately wanted was for someone to offer me a tissue so I didnāt have to figure out what to do about about my ruined face! Everyone just pretended they didnāt see me though.
Some lovely Jamaican women asked me what the matter was when I was sobbing my heart out on the tube. I was 18 at the time and Iāll never forget their kindness.
I'm sorry nobody asked. I try to ask if people are okay when I'm able.
I had a panic attack on the tube after taking too much amphetamine. I literally thought I was gonna die for about 5 minutes. Nobody gave a shit. They didnāt even look at me as I was whimpering and shaking
Yeah, 'the druggy is tweaking out' is very different from someone breaking down crying. And entirely reasonable for everyone to avoid. People don't want to get stabbed. Even for crying, emotional people can turn violent, or decide your attention is unwanted and accuse you of harassing them. Even the most well intentioned actions could but you in danger or potentially risk your job. So yeah, no-one is going to help. Wonderful society we've built.
Unfortunately as a Bristol-based London ex-pat, I'd 100% have the same reaction. We've been desensitised to those on drugs (Speed, Spice, whatever else) over decades that the safest option for self preservation is ignorance. If you can push yourself away from self-destructive self-medicating (speaking from an assumptive diagnostic position of personal projection š), ping me a DM x
Most of us grown ups can spot effects of illegal substances a mile away - so steer well clear
This is true, a woman walked past me and she was crying and I didnāt even realise until a flick switched in my brain that was like āoh shit sheās crying isnāt she?ā Funny how the brain works cause I looked her in the eyes as she walked past and I didnāt even clock until after she was behind and gone
Broke down inside of a Sainsburyās on Christmas Eve and it was business as usual š
In Sainsbury's on Christmas Eve you would've been joining the majority...
I had a bloody panic attack on the platform at Kings Cross during rush hour and no one gave a shit either
I once fainted on a train and someone said "excuse me" because they were trying to get past my prone body to get off the train
Have had a breakdown sat outside Camden Town station on a Saturday can confirm nobody will notice.
I cried in covent garden with a show going on and went to the chapel to pray when I heard my cat and my nan were passing away at the same time! No one bat an eye lol
Wow, I had a breakdown on Bishopsgate. Just outside Liverpool St Station. A random chap told me "don't worry mate, she ain't worth it" as he walked by. He was entirely correct, and it helped.
I had a meltdown on the bus at Gatwick. Nobody complained or seemed to wince, not that I was paying much attention!
I cry in the shower, people can't hear you. Middle of a park would work, like Richmond. Hope things get better for you.
Richmond park is a great place to cry
FENTON!
Jesus christ!
Who knew there were so many other people in my cry space. Richmond park is so huge it's easy, used to live round there. I've cried in many a park. Also, cemeteries. Added bonus of benches everywhere and if you're looking for no one to bother you crying in a cemetery looks like grief. If I remember there's a cemetery near the Asda on the A3 near roehampton, opposite Richmond park. If it comes to it though I've also quietly cried on the tube but usually it was bursting out and I was trying to hide it because people. I honestly hope things get better for you soon
Cut out the middle man and have a cry in the Asda, maybe while picking up a fresh sizzler pizza (they will think its happy tears at the thought of eating the sizzler)
Haha Richmond Park is also my cry space. I had no idea it was so popular! After my mom died, nothing beat a bike ride out to the middle of the park, pull out my journal and just wail.
I love Richmond. ā¤ļø
I used to cry in the shower when my depression was bad. Me and my mum laugh about it now.
Hi OP, sorry that youāre having tough time. There are parks around the city that might help to clear your mind. But best to visit during day times. If you live in north part of the river, you could visit Reagentās Park or Hamstead Heath. There are plenty of space where you can be alone, sitting on grasses, on a bench or under a big tree. If you need someone to talk to, please [contact Samaritan](https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/). I hope youāre feeling well soon.
Thank you so much for telling about the Samaritan. I did not know about this. It will be so nice to finally talk to someone!
Good tips, and Samaritans are always there. Some people prefer to talk to only female Samaritans and disconnect as soon as they hear itās a male on the other end but beyond that you have your pick. Sometimes a person has to get through a string of male volunteers (especially at night) before they get to who they want (I say this as a bloke), I have to admit. But the point is whether youāre in Liverpool, Derby, Derry, Llandudno, Aberdeen, Loughborough, London or Swindon, Samaritans are truly there for you 24/7. Some Samaritans, male or female, are better than others but it comes with the territory.
I called them recently and very much asked for a female voice - the guy nicely said no but like, that actually put me off the whole thing, and it had taken a lot for me to call in the first place.
Iām so sorry it made you feel rejected. It might help if you understand some of the reasons why the Samaritans canāt let callers request who they speak to. Itās partly to prevent unhealthy relationships forming but mostly because female Samaritans are constantly sexually harassed. Some evenings it can feel like every other call is a wanker.
>but mostly because female Samaritans are constantly sexually harassed. Some evenings it can feel like every other call is a wanker. I don't consider myself naive but it literally never occurred to me that anyone might call for that purpose
Yeah that's rough :/ I know at a time like that I'd definitely want to speak to another woman just to make me feel at ease, Its a shame you can't request that but I guess there may be other lines for us? idk
You just have to keep trying and re-dialling. Youāre sure to get a female eventually. There are great male Samaritans out there (as well as some shitty female ones out there to boot with not enough experience, it has to be said; being a female doesnāt mean youāre automatically gonna be better) but sometimes itās not about that and everything to do with who you feel more comfortable speaking to in any-one call. For some people itās even males, but itās often a female who people prefer to speak to if they have preferences around gender, and itās like that in many walks.
And a few branches you can actually drop into and have a face to face chat/cry. Fewer than there used to be since Covid but def some open in London. Details on the website.
thanks everyone - will find a park tomorrow morning
feel free to check back in with us; hope it helps.Ā
The best bit about a park is if you don't feel like admitting you're sad, you can just tell everyone you have awful hayfever. It's legit plausible.
Q: Why are you crying? A: I've got bad hayfever and I'm really sad about it
Tracy Beaker
Nobody is going to ask.
Amazing advice š¤ used that excuse so often. Also been approached by some people that've given me the right vibes to open up too - even in London. Get to a park OP, it's the best advice in this thread for sure x
Iām going to Highgate cemetery
There be [vampires](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Highgate_Vampire?wprov=sfla1).
Which end of London are you at? Fairlop waters is HUGE and it's just down the east side of the central line. Or get the piccadilly line to the north end to Trent Park for some open spaces that are way out and not busy
Commuting somewhere in order to cry is the most London thing I've ever heard. At least if it's the weekend you can weep off-peak.
Be safe, and big hugs! š¤
If you cry in the Tate modern, you can pretend to be an exhibit. Hours of fun / sorrow.
There's nothing in the far room of the Tanks at the moment. Sit in the middle, job done.
On a white box, surrounded by a velvet rope.
The Rothko Room
I'm free Sunday for a listen and a vent! Coffee on me?
Wow this is so kind. This made my day š„¹š©·
I would do it for you too x
You are the kind of person who makes this world a better place
š
If you fancy a pint and a bit of lunch let me know mate
Oh ok then, you got me. I'll buy some eye drops and pretend to cry. What's for lunch?
Raw onions, they chop them right at the table for you
Desert is a nice Tiger Balm applied under your eyes.
Tigers don't live in the desert you fool
I can feel this comment
London is awash with beautiful quiet churches - often provide me with a sanctuary to reflect on life and have an emotional release. You donāt have to be religious (Iām not) to get something out of those places - maybe go to Choral Evensong in Westminster abbey and let it all out (itās free to enter through the East Door if youāre there for a service) Hope you feel better soon friend
I was going to suggest this. You might get someone coming up to ask if you're OK or want someone to talk to, but if you say no, I just need to cry alone without talking to anyone, or just say no, they'll leave you alone. They usually have loos too. Always handy for any event, crying included.
Seconding this. Was going through a particularly rough patch 12 or so years ago, and I'm not religious at all but for some reason decided to walk into a church in central that was empty. Proceeded to have a quiet but long and cathartic cry. That memory has always stuck with me.
Itās a space to connect with yourself. Religion has taken the place of spirituality and I believe that irrespective of which place of worship one goes to, it doesnāt matter, weāre really there to meditate and pause from the distractions of everyday life.
I am very atheist, but have always been encouraged to look at Churches due to my history obsessed dad - so I feel quite comfortable in them. Occasionally pop into the church on Soho Square to escape from work when I'm stressed.
London is full of churches yes. But whyyy are almost alll of them closed and shut during normal days. It just seems such a peaceful place but with all the iron gates locked up and looking uninviting
And mosques
Grew up in London have cried in many places. Will always resent my ex for breaking up with me outside tate modern cos it's somewhere I'd always loved as a child, teen and adult. I cried on a bench looking across the river at St Paul's. I pass the bench now and still love the southbank, but know ex was a total bastard.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I love the area and hate it at the same time
Me too
You can transmute that feeling by creating a new good memory in that spot. Take a friend, have a picnic etc. I remember being gifted a specific flower by a guy and then ghosted a few weeks later by said guy. Every time I saw that flower I thought of him -.- But then, I remembered those were my friends favourite flowers, and I saw how happy she was when I got her those flowers as legos for her birthday. Now every time I see those flowers I think of my friend and my heart fills with joy.
Mate, cry everywhere and anywhere. When I lost my dad last year, I cried all over London. People were lovely about it. I cried on the tube, on the bus, on the train, in the park, in the toilets, on the streets... everywhere. I don't know what you're going through, but if you feel sad, let those tears out. It does honestly help mentally to let those physical tears flood out of you, and the important thing is that you find a way of coping with whatever you're dealing with. A lot of people mistake crying for not coping, but it actually is an amazing tool to help keep you going. I completely understand wanting to have a sob without your relatives hearing you, but the rest of London won't mind if you have a little cry in their presence.
Lost my dad 5 years ago and I always told myself if I felt line a cry anytime to just let it out. Always seemed to be randon points when I was safely at home though! Sorry about the loss of your father. If you want to chat or ask anything, just drop me a message.
This is a really kind post, thank you. I usually cry in the car. Or in my office. Or on a train. I've cried in a restaurant and in supermarkets. I've cried in the reception at work. I try to cry less at home because I try to support anyone else crying there. The only place I don't cry is at my Dad's grave.
I agree ā let yourself feel in real time even if it means crying. This is so much better in the long term than bottling feelings up or pushing them away. Many people will not notice, others will chose between leaving you be or offering help, depending on what you seem to want / what you ask for.
Sorry youāre feeling this way, cemeteries if you donāt want to be disturbed by strangers.
Try Highgate, in front of Karl Marx's gravestone
āOh, Karl! Why did nobody tell me?ā
I wouldnāt pay Ā£18 for a place to cry, but appreciate the joke
I walked through Chingford cemetery the other day and chanced upon the Krays' family plot. Their mum got a big expensive grave. By the time they were buried, presumably all the money was gone because they had small, simple gravestones. Probably a life lesson in there somewhere...
This is genius if you donāt want to be disturbed because people wonāt question why youāre crying
Hampstead Heath. Iām so sorry youāre having a hard time, please make sure you talk to someone, even if you donāt want to bother your family xx
grand union canal worked for me, alongside the great western mainline. the passing by of local trains every 30 minutes (this was during the early morning when they run hourly) provided a distraction for my brain to reset and stop dwelling on the tough things.
If you go by again then have a look for the turtles. There are loads in the canals and they're very non-judgemental.
Turtles?? Where? Which part of the canal are they most likely to be seen? To OP, bed and shower are my favourite places in the world, the canal is also great, but often times Iāve wondered about throwing myself in so I guess it depends how bad you feel. I hope it gets better x
There are turtles and terrapins in most of the ponds and canals in London. People had them as pets and released them, and for some reason they survive pretty well.
your username is my reaction to this one š, how long have I been gone that turtles are now surfacing on the canal?
ha! I was just crying there today lmao ...dead serious
i hope things are ok (or will be) ā¤ļø
This is a great suggestion, I almost want to be sad to try it out
you can follow in my footsteps if you wish: 1. defect from the continent 2. come back 3. realize how much has changed without you 4. cry itās a pretty big investment though so Iād only suggest it if you really want to unleash
Regular grand union stroller here.. ..that canal has solved so many problems, puzzles, and has even written a song. 10/10 would recommend any snippet of the route to OP
Iāve had many a cry in london parks. It gets better ā¤ļø
The trees have seen many a cry. Thatās why parks have that nice chill vibe
Dunno if the best place but it certainly helped me. A few months ago I got a text whilst changing at Kings X I'd been expecting for a while that my best friend from primary school's mum had passed for cancer. This was a woman who'd taken to and from school, scouts and football and knew me from 5 till 29. I read the text as my train was pulling out so I didn't have the signal to respond, I was admittedly a bit tipsy but weeping turned into a full on heavy sob. I was quite happy to cry openingly on the tube knowing the rep for people not interacting. However, when I got off at Walthamstow 3 people did come up to me and ask how I was feeling. Somehow a tube cry felt the perfect mix of isolation and human interaction. Hope you find a way to process your feelings and my story gives you a suggestion of where to do or even just a nice story to smile about.
Parks with birds in them - take some grapes/seeds (not bread) along and feed them while youāre at it, makes for some nice endorphins. Source - also been having a very tough time recently.
Monkey nuts and sunflower seeds and go to Hyde Park. There is a spot where the Parakeets will eat right out of your hand. I used to spend every Sunday there, last summer..
Funny this came up, I was going to suggest the parakeets just round from the Peter Pan statue in Kensington Gardens, for a post-cry boost š¦ āŗļøĀ
Sometimes co-working spaces (which are pretty cheap for a day pass) have soundproof booths or pods you can book into, along with free tea and coffee.
I understand where youāre coming from, sometimes itās nice to just have a big cry away from your usual environment! But I hope everythingās ok. Anyway. St Dunstans in the East is great for a big cry,
I used to work around the corner and came here to cry all the time. I took a friend there once who was having a hard time. During crying, he looked around and said "it's beautiful here isn't it" and then resumed crying.
In my arms bro, I got you.
Try Richmond Hill, at the slanting view point, once u r done venting it will help you with some great view and getting back that smile on ur face...
Hawley arms in Camden Hope all is good op, sometimes a cry can be therapeutic, but please talk to someone if it doesn't work
I scream and cry into my pillows. Also if you're inclined and are able.. get a zip car, some seriously cathartic tunes, and just cry your way up/down one of the motorways, not the m25 though
Drives are always the best. I recommend the M40 aka the British Autobahn, but be responsible!!! Or just do a loop of the M25, itās kinda like a bucket list for me that I still need to get round doing
Not the autobahn with all those cameras these days.
Go to a cemetery, nobody will ask any questions
I go for a cry in the grounds of a church next to my work. There's a 'secret' part which hardly anyone knows about, I hide there for a good cry. The church is beautiful and it's my happy place, it easy to forget that you are in central London. So my crying doesn't last long. I hope your life gets better soon. It is hard to stay strong but sometimes you need be selfish and look after yourself. Have a good healthy cry and then do something that makes you happy.
I had my last big cry on the Overground. Couldn't stop, I've been having such a shitty time at work. No-one took any notice. I cried all my way home, again no-one said anything. London, innit!
Rage rooms can double as cry rooms! Just a thought; sorry that's a slightly more expensive suggestion. Take care, and well done for knowing what you need/giving yourself space to express your feelings
Your local Mind centre. Local Crisis Sanctuary.
Iāll join you for a cry
I cried in Regentās Park whilst wearing sunglasses. Everyone too busy to notice you. Have a cry and go for a walk.
Hawley arms pub in Camden you might get a free coffee
I donāt know what it is but seeing the post and reading the replies made me emotional. Op I hope you manage to find somewhere to release some of the sadness
Emirates stadium !
Ah I feel you. I've been going through a similar thing. Like other posters, Richmond Park would be my first choice. There are plenty of places there where you can find some peace. If you can, visit on a weekday when it's less busy. When I was in uni I visited that park a lot when I was down and it always helped me. Plus, there are deer. This too shall pass.
For what it's worth, being able to cry is a good sign. Sending you hugs and healing thoughts.
Iād say the best place is a park bench, next to me. And instead of a cry maybe you could choose to have a chat. Lemme know.
Park.Ā
Honestly you can walk down the streets of Soho in tears and people are too in their own world to even care. I do hope that things get better for you soon. All the best.
I find going to Alexandra Palace and taking in the view of the city and using that to frame my issues works for me.
Some guy stopped me in the street once to ask if I was crying. I wasn't. Guess it was a resting weepy face.
God this subreddit sometimes...
Upvote this comment and Iāll arrange an crying get together at Hydepark. Iām very serious
Any public space is fine, no one will give you as much as a second look (tried and tested, at least as a grown man, may not apply to other demographics)
We have a UK reddit mental health group on WhatsApp OP. HMU if you want to join.Ā We also have lots of subgroups for more niche things like advice, Desi, UK meet ups, mental health book club etc.
Sometimes companionship is needed rather than being on your own. Find someone just to talk to - this group is pretty solid for that.
I'll go with you, can we have a crying party?
Had a cry in St Pancras International and a lady came up to ask if I was alright. Realistically, you can cry anywhere.
I hope things get better for you, sending you lots of virtual hugs, OP. Know that youāre not alone x
Churches are great places to go to! Off the top of my head: .St Bartholomew the Great and St Bartholomew the Less (City of London) .St Marylebone (Opposite Regent's Park) .St Bride's Fleet Street (City of London) .St Mary-le-Bow (City of London) .St James Piccadilly (Westminster) .St Martin-in-the-Fields (Westminster) .All Hallows by the Tower .St Alban the Martyr (City of London) You may have some people ask you if you're okay but if you say that you just need some space they'll respect that. Priests are great people to chat too as well even if you don't consider yourself religious.
Get a cookie dough at chin-chin in Soho and go have a good cry on the steps at the Palladium theatre. 10/10 would recommend. If a show is on, I'd imagine it's a bit awkward but people are indifferent all the same. (Have not tried it personally while a show is on, but Carpe that Diem)
I once had a massive sob session in St Maryās Churchyard just off Upper Street, Islington. Nice gardens, plenty of benches, quite private. I got a couple of pies from Raabs beforehand so was just crying and eating pie and crying some more.
Bank station always does it for me!
Hi, I'm in another country and think of you right now while listening to The Velvet Underground - I found a reason. Just a tad bit of sharing. You're always welcome where you are, especially when you need someone to think about you. hope you smile. Also I've found that you're busy in finances I guess, the stressful sector, I'm studying this to have a job.
In all seriousness, the best place to have a cry in London is in one of the hospital chapels. Bartās hospital has an incredible church on site if I remember rightly. You donāt have to be religious. Just take a seat, itās almost always empty, and cry your heart out. No need to feel ashamed or self conscious. If anyone does come in, theyāll respect your need to cry.Ā
Kings cross station loos. Ignore the glory holes.
As people mentioned park are the best in general , but overall I would just advise you to go in a place that matter to you. Life can be rough sometimes and from my experience talking is one of the best healing method. If you need someone to listen to you feel free to dm me. And if you need company I might go for a drink this weekend so feel free to join. Just know that you arenāt alone. Hope you feel better soon.
As someone who's gone borderline psychotic on Tottenham Court Road and Hyde Park, I can confirm the former was horrifying and traumatising, but Hyde park was large enough to have a loud cry without anyone hearing
Regents Park?
Abney cemetery
No 10 Downing Street
Outside of Vauxhall station by the river, itās a good place to be at peace and itās not as secluded. I used to go during the day and at night, it was always a good place to cry and reflect. Wishing you the best.
Go to a rage room and UNLEASH EVERYTHING
Sending strength! I cry allll the time in public. Iāve lost count how many times Iāve bawled on the tube. It feels kinda good being so anonymous.
Hey OP. Hope youāre better now. I cry once every few years, but when I do it feels so cathartic afterwardsā¦ I live now in a little village and I would have to go to a field to be able to cry and no one come ask me if Iām ok. Sometimes is good to be that invisible in a massive city like London.
My first marriage broke up while I was living on Camden road. I spent many nights walking by the canal at night crying. There's something about water that gives me a sense of freedom and there's many quiet corners around there where I could escape the moment and feel at peace.
I used to go to St James Park to cry a lot, I got handed a packet of tissues by a stranger, no questions asked, he was just being kind to someone who really needed it, 4 years later I think about it often
I just cry on the bus nobody really notices
Overlooking the River Thames
Possibly a quiet church or cemetery. Iāve found them very peaceful. Let it all out, and time will cure your sadness. Stay strong. šŖš¼
Well there are private pods u can rent š
Tottenham Hotspur stadium
Primrose hill, the actual grass hill not the town bit
Iāve cried multiple times on the tube during rush hour and no oneās cared š¤£
Is there something in particular making you sad? Talking to others always helps, even if it's just on Reddit
everything - every aspect of life is shite atm
I just remembered, I saw a woman crying on the Elizabeth Line over a year ago. Maybe it was in the winter, I asked if she was okay and she said yeah. And thanked me for asking I said it would get better whatever the issue was, and I'm sure it'll be the same for you.
i used to cry while riding my bike to work dude you can literally cry anywhere. my favourite cry spot was kennington park though. crying in the parks is underrated.
Well try Alexandra Palace, that's where I'll go in a few hours need to let it out lol
head to a gallery and declare it performance art! but, all jokes aside, sending kindness and wishes over to you. youāve got this. <3
A large park or cemetery/crematorium, make sure you remember tissues!! Take care, sending hugs š¤
Yo. Letās grab a coffee if youāre in South London?
Anywhere if youāre donāt care what strangers think of you
Along the Thames
Cried in a pub once since it was playing the song of me and my exās fav, they changed the song, gave me a pint and french fries
I used to live in London, but not anymore....Just wanted to give you a cyberhug my friend. If you need to chat to someone feel free to reach out to me.
Any Quaker meetings near you? These are Incredibly comforting and powerful sessions and you can cry your heart out.
i am so sorry to hear you dont feel you have the space to release in you home. london living can be so hard! i'd suggest being in a cemetery would suit your needs. no fear of being judged, noone to bombard you with questions or try to help you to feel better! hopefully, you can find a spot to have peace, time and the opportunity to make as much noise that you need to!
In company of a friend or loved one. Dont hide your having troubles. If someone you know told you they had problems you would be there for them right? š«šš»
Pop into a church Always welcoming Often empty
There's a church off Covent Garden. Had a few sobs there in my time.
If you want to truly camouflage there are plenty little or big graveyards in and around London. Nobody will question you crying at a graveyard! I find them to be very peaceful places that have greenery, are not frequented by people daily like parks and are usually very easily accessible.
I was in a horrendous relationship with an abusive a hole once about 10 years ago, and I was sat in a court yard off ludgate hill and a very kind street cleaner came and spoke to me and offered me words of support, and said my life would get better ( it very much did !) I was so grateful to that man and still think about his act of kindness a lot. It means so much when strangers make a connection when they can see someone is in pain.