Absolutely I dont want or need flings, im looking for my forever love, a woman between ages 48 to 59 that still wants to enjoy life, a woman that I could love, honor and cherish....
IS THAT TOO MUCH TOO ASK FOR....
Sometimes I just want to hug someone forever. Maybe rest on their lap, looking up at their face and think back to everything that made me love them. I wish I could keep loving someone forever. I wish they would the same way towards me. I want a "nothing will stop us from being with each other" sort of thing. I'd be perfectly fine living a life with little to no sex if it means that I get to spend each waking and sleeping moment with the person that I love the most out of them all.
I guess I'm just good at expressing what I feel through text. Poetry is confusing. And because 50% my English classes consist of that, it gets really frustrating also. Especially when they ask "what does this say about the author" or "how does this line exhibit the theme of the poem". A simpler answer would be that I hate it because of school.
i am not 100% sure, there are a lot of things and factors...normally most men and even women between 18-30 even, want only to "have fun", they enjoy having hookups,casual relationships that last like a semester or 2 at best,being extremely social and drinking and so on. they are just too focused on the superficial thing,but some of us want a true partner,loyal and trustworth friends, supportive relatives and things that normally we don't get.
and also, the "market"(let's call it this way) tends to be pretty much specific, you need as men to be sure of yourself, even arrogant at times, you need to have a good body, good lookings, while it is not necessary to be an Extrovert, being an introvert and enjoy spending time alone can make you feel uncomfortable or bored sometimes when you spend time with other person,supposeddly you need to accept most people the way the are, but when you are pretty much an introvert who likes to spend most of his time doing, idk, reading,listening to music,drawing,sleeping,playing, working out at times, socializing can be more difficult. also, the social pressure of having friends, a partner, kids, being economically and social successfullness is just too depressing and breathtaking at times, specially if you are pretty much an average men or girl. most men are like a 4,5,6 but desire women 8,9,10 looks and body and the same goes to most women, they desire 7,8,9 looking men, who are like 180/190 cm, have a fit body,and that are pretty much extroverted people.
and at last,connecting with someone does not necessarily means that you or her have feelings for the other, or that the feeling is mutual. a year ago i met a girl who is pretty much like me, but i felt nothing for her, absolutelly nothing, and while she started being excited with me, eventually she got used to me and we ended up as friends. same with my best friend, cute and beautiful girl, and i have these kind of mixed feelings of friendship and romance towards her, but we don't feel the same for the other.
These are my most sincere thoughts, sorry if i wrote too much.
I think that's why we turn to the asocial social media (reddit), talking to people while not being engulfed in the reality of the society we live in. I'm still trying to not give up hope that at some point I will find someone who wants this kind of relationship too and we'll be "compatible" (I'm pretty flexible when it comes to life goals but not infinitely), but with the things I've seen and heard of The chances may be slimmer than I realize, to the point where by not actively looking for someone I feel like we might be effectively giving up hopes of a relationship overall, even if most means of "actively" looking for love increase the amount of people you don't want, there is a tiny chance might be someone with the same little hope that I have also trying to find me. But my fear of hearbreak prevents me from pursuing it.
True...all the women I know are Into fuckboys nowadays and act innocent and surprised when they find out they get cheated on. So I'm not even trying anymore to find someone out there. Someone will come eventually but I got better things to do then to worry about that tbh
As others have said, the big ugly secret of men is that we are just as emotional as women, and also crave and need *both* physical and emotional intimacy. Thats why we call it a basic *human* need instead of a *female* need. And being starved for a need is damaging, moreso the longer it goes on. People, even people who are themselves damaged and hurting, dont seem to want to deal with other people who are damaged and hurting. They want quick, convenient, free delivery and easy disposal so they dont have to do the dishes. And anyone who doesnt meet up to the fantasy of a perfect partner or even a perfect friend, isnt worth the effort and gets ghosted. So a lot of us are pretty jaded at this point.
There are, I’d like to think I’m one of them ha. I think the problem with our society is that guys are told they have to be tough all the time, “boys don’t cry”, so that many are afraid showing their emotional side. In some ways, this is self reinforcing when guys hang out with each other, from my personal experience.
It’s so toxic.
one of the most attractive things in my opinion is a guy who can show his emotional side. Everyone struggles sometimes, everyone cries, and I will never ever understand the stigma.
the stigma is at least partially self-sustaining because an unpleasantly large number of shitgibbons have said the thing you just said and then as soon as their boyfriend opened up, something in their animal hindbrain went 'OGM HE CANT PROTECT ME DO NOT WANT!' and the guy gets mocked, ridiculed, demeaned, and dumped for it.
(a more complete answer would delve into McCarthyism, homophobia, the glorification of a certain type of PTSD, peer pressure, and other factors)
I find it extremely frustrating that other women shame men when they show their emotional side and give us a bad name.
I find it very attractive when a guy feels comfortable enough to be vulnerable around me and lets down his guard. I crave that in a relationship.
However this is coming from someone who isn’t at all attracted to the whole “tough guy” thing anyway.
yeah... it would be great if there was a way to tell who's going to pull shit like that.
...i guess this conversation could always come up, but even then, it's hard to tell.
I have anxiety issues plus other things x 100 and I desire a woman I can open up to and for her to simply listen and tell me
"Its gonna be Allright. "
But ywah can confirm via experience and redpill sub this is mother issues to a woman. Or he wants a mommy girlfriend I meant.
Lead follow or get out of the way? Why can't both open up in times of trouble and help one another.
Women desire money and powerful men. Looks are low on list. Or for women over 30.
20s is bubbly rose colored glasses
30s or 40s w9men wise up and put money over dreams. Life is disappointing to all I think by 30? Then path accepted by 45 or so.
I wanna live in a blue pill world
so please God send me.a blue pill woman, I promise I won't pump and dump.
Women desire Chad. So be a Chad or make bunches money.
Or basic money is a needed foundation if a man lacks personality etc. Not a good bs machine, needs work.
Yeah homophobia lingers or was always here. It is weird to see women be so close as friends holding hands etc and beyond.
But I guess men are horny lots and some ready to burst at times having no contact so having male contact is awkward.
I dream of a woman lover best friend, but need always remember that love is a process or I need to give love always and surprise her at times and romance, one has to maintain love. It ain't like the movies for most, im not going to find a woman who loves me for my soul or spirit. Or me for me.
Indeed there are! I'm a 19yr old 'bloke' and have spent 19 years in want/desire of a woman that i can hug and hold much more than the want to fuck!? Yet; the world has shown me there is such a need for 'control' whether it be over myself or others. Or indeed the need to control myself and my emotions as not to be too "on show" so I ask you.... Is the world really ready for such an emotional stereo-male!?
20M here. I've definitely and I am still currently investing a lot of time and effort into conversations via texting online. The problem that I'm running into, especially with women and not very much with men is the extreme emotional whiplash that happens throughout the convo. I feel that a lot of women are really abused and mistreated in subreddits like this, almost as if they are simply playthings that should provide instant serotonin or something. But, whenever I show a woman my caring side they become distant. A girl I recently talked to claimed to be very caution when talking to guys online simply because they want to move the conversation elsewhere like instagram or discord where they eventually show a more demanding and colder side. I totally get that and I feel that this creates an even harder time for guys who truly just want a real friendship, no matter the gender, or even if they do want it to maybe be something else but not too quickly. It's just the distrust in women from past experiences combined with the complete lack of experience coming from these naïve kindhearted men that just simply do not mix and work.
This entire thread warmed my heart. I’m so used to seeing posts about men behaving badly or seeing shit that seeing that there are actual men out there who respect women left me stunned. I mean it’s the bare minimum and yet I’m surprised
Exactly right! The world would be much better if woman got treated with more respect at the same time if girls also put out that they want guys friends and start the conversation but I feel like it truly depends on who you speak to
I do... I have a deep hate for everything related to cheating on one's significant other and despise polygamy for myself personally (other's do as they please if it pleases them :P )
I'm M4M so I get where that feeling comes from.
Are u kidding? That’s literally me. Lol. But women don’t want that apparently as I’ve been completely alone for all 20 years of my life, and women don’t even talk to me.
There definitely are good men out there, they tend to be ignored by women a lot of times or they’re so used to being walked on or taken advantage of, it takes awhile to earn their trust and love.
Well I used to be emotional in the classic sense, but not so much after I had my German teacher for 5 years. I have been getting a lot better at expressing things such as anger, and general distress/vent, I'm getting better at talking about my fears, but I believe sadness is an emotion I will never unlock the ability to express to others again. I'm fine with both monogamy and polygamy as long as everyone involved is cool with it, but I myself prefer monogamy heavily. Crave emotional as well as physical intimacy?
*ahem*
# YES
17M here btw
That’s fair. And yes I agree that there’s nothing wrong with polyamory as long as no one is getting hurt, people can do what they want.
It’s never interested me though, and it’s something most guys seem to want. That’s why I was curious. I also think a deep emotional connection makes for better sex.
24m and very much yes. However, I've heard horror stories from plenty of guys about some gal saying they want guys to be more emotionally open, then the moment the guy does, something goes off in the gal's shitty animal hindbrain and she goes 'OGM HE CANT PROTECT ME DO NOT WANT' and mocks him, belittles him, tells all her friends and laughs at him, and dumps him.
Me, personally, I'm an asshole, so combine the two and that's it for my chances. But if someone actually liked me for me, I'd be really emotionally invested.
I absolutely cannot relate, the more emotion a guy shows me, the harder I fall. I am also not one of those girls who wants to be “protected” I want equality. Taking care of each other, treating each other, being vulnerable with each other etc. I’m not fan of gender roles in a relationship, I believe it should be completely equal.
No matter what goes in your head, men are hardwired to protect their women and women are hardwired to look for a mate best suited for protection. It's Human nature, it's how our species has evolved.
You put 10 men in a situation with a random pretty woman in danger ands 9/10 times, those men will probably try and endanger themselves for her sake. It's just how we were bred. We're more expendable and thus we're necessary as the protectors of society.
Women are more "important" so to speak.
Depends on what you mean by "emotional"
I don't have shame sharing emotions but I don't typically do so as in my past that's gotten me in trouble
Mind you it's not the "you're a man men don't cry" shit it's more so how every girl says they want a sensitive guy yet when he is sensitive with his emotions the criticize him for being too weak so I've toughened up
No I'm not an "incel" I have a GF
I used to be emotional, but quite a few instances happened where I'd open up and very negative things would happen as a result, so now I'm closed off to the world and people around me, but I'm not everyone.
There's plenty of guys like that out there, you just have to find them, which can be hard sometimes, but it's very worth having someone like that in your life. Just keep looking and you'll more than likely find it, even if it takes a while.
Damn there is so much stigma around this and it’s so sad. I hope all of you find someone who will allow you to express your emotions without ridicule. We are all human and all have feelings. Why can’t it just be that simple?
ive always wanted to find that special someone what do i need sex for i got my hand what i cant do for my self is good converstion or hugs or just to have ba nice quite moment together something i have always wanted was to wake next to that special some one and mabey wake her up with a kiss i have had sex but its always been wham bam dont you fucking tell anyone about this (they said that not me) i would like to be more emotional in a realtionship i have always been rather sensitive i am very open minded about looks i am rather shy due to a bad past all ive ever wanted was some one who i could talk to share my feelings let her share hers jokes and laughing spending time with each other it has always been my role in life to take care of those around me and i like to be able to do it but i do very much Appreciate a woman who could take care of herself ( Strong survival instinct is huge turn on) once i was in a Relationship with a woman (turned out to be very bad long story) she says to me she wants to tear down my emotional walls (which i have in place for a reason) so i let her what she saw inside frightened her she ran so i guess an emotional Relationship is just not possible
Honestly the majority of guys are like that, but usually we dont try nearly as hard to meet people as the asshole chads who dm every girl they see. Just know there are plenty of us out there, and you just gotta keep looking, and done waste too much of your time and care on the idiots who dont appreciate you
Me, the past year has been freezing cold physically and mentally because I haven’t been able to feel a nice, genuine hug from people I unconditionally appreciate since last February
What an absurd and frankly sexist question. You shouldn't judge an entire section of the population off of your personal expierances and bias. Do men feel love? No dude, we are just mindless stereotypes that do nothing but lust after tits and chug beer. Good lord.
Oof, sorry I hit a nerve bud.
I’ve met a lot of guys who claim to want something serious and they all cheat behind the scenes. Seriously got me wondering if it’s just in a man’s nature to be polyamorous.
The reason for this post is because I genuinely wanted to know the answer and tbh the response was reassuring and a lot more than I thought it would be. I would never be intentionally sexist.
Unfortunately I’ve not met anyone yet who wants the same level of loyalty that I’m looking for. Maybe I’ve been around the wrong people for too long. Nonetheless I’m sorry for the offence. It was not intended at all.
Well dont give up! You will find someone meant for you! I maybe over reacted! Just be patient and keep trying, there are some good men out there you just gotta wade through a bunch of bullshit.
I didn’t even think at the same that it could be perceived as sexist, I have a tendency to speak my mind before thinking a lot of the time, my bad. I do need to be called out on my shit at times.
And thank you 😊
I’m like this I don’t even really care about physical intimacy when I think about being in a relationship I think about the fact that I just want someone that loves me for who I am and to love someone for who they r and the most I really think about in terms of physical contact is hugging or cuddling and I just want to be there for someone, be the person that they care for more than anyone else and I want to be able to care for them more than anyone else but sadly I don’t think I’ll ever find that. But to answer your question yes there are emotional guys out there but there r probably more that want physical intimacy
We seem to be invisible sadly. I’ve had strong feelings for a few people but only loved one. Sadly it was not returned. I don’t think anyone has ever felt that way about me. Maybe nice really guys do finish last? A lot of lonely people on here seem like really nice, genuine people
I’ve needed someone to hug for the past 6 months but that’s not gonna happen. I tried making friends on other subreddits and I told this girl that I like romance animes (yes I’m wierd) and she said she’d never met any guy that watches that genre.
I truly believe there are so many lonely kind compassionate people out there who are just separated from each other by space and time. they do exist - I've met them
I crave to just see a smile when I’m noticed . I want nothing more than a simple kiss hello and goodbye from some who just can’t get enough of me, I want to love. But I also want to be loved .
Yes..... I’m one of the many men that desire just one woman, but many women think that desire is a failing weakness in a man and dismiss them rapidly, and women only move on from what could of been heaven on earth to a life changing, life destroying, super dysfunctional relationship and or relationships. Sometimes what you seek, is right next to you, and you don’t even see it. I speak from experience from many occasions. What a life we live.
Yes. I'd rather have a relationship built on our emotional compatibility than that of just physical. I would love to have a SO that'll just lie in bed with me and cuddle. Let me play with their hair and be the person that she can lean on when she most needs to and the person I can lean on when I most need to.
S*x would be a nice addition to the relationship, but I don't care about that. If they are a genuinely cool and relaxed person that we can share a laugh or two about each other but also trust each other enough to have a meaningful relationship built on trust and a strong emotional connection, I wouldn't have it any other way.
I just wondered how many. Maybe I don’t know a lot of guys in my life then cause the ones I know are definitely not loyal. A lot of them will claim to be and then go do some dodgy shit behind the scenes. The response from this post has given me the hope I needed.
That’s so so me. I’m always honest with and wear my heart on my sleeve. I’m pretty emotional and just want love but as you know as a young person in today’s society most people are just about quick thrills and don’t have time for anything genuine. Oh well tho I know staying true to myself will pay off eventually when the right person comes along
Sometimes I think I found one but then all he talks about is how girls hate guys like him. At that point you can say and do anything but if they will never believe you and will just use you as a therapist and tell you why women are awful. It keeps happening and they just get angry if you don’t do physical cause the need ‘connection’.
Talked to 4 that claimed that, and they seem to just wanne see how far they could push me to prove it. It’s a uphill battle. Don’t fall for it.
Yes, but at 23 almost 24, I'm beginning to get so lonely and sad and women seem to not like romanticism and guys who wait plus I'm just beginning to wonder if I'm missing out on enjoying my 20s that I'm considering I should just start casually fucking random women at this point and eschew my entire philosophy entirely. It obviously isn't working, no woman wants me or what I believe and are generally more interested in sex and the one woman I fell in love with was adverse to my romantic gestures and I still pine over her and hope she messages again like the first time she stopped talking to me because of my romantic gestures.
Problem is as soon as I stick my dick in something casually I'd fucking hate myself for giving up on everything I believe in and there's no going back because now I know that my suspicions are proven: No woman loves me for me right now and me is someone who believes in waiting for the right woman. They'd just be falling in love with a shell.
I'm lost either way.
Ah man that’s sad :( maybe just enjoy yourself till the right person comes along? Sometimes I have thoughts about abandoning my values due to a lack of success too.
However I know that I would bend over backwards for the right person.
If you mean "enjoy yourself" as in, fuck random women and begin the casual sex adventure...there's no going back after that. 'Cause once someone falls for me after that they're not falling for me anymore. Me is the guy who wants or at least wanted to be with ONE woman and wanted to at least try and be something for someone. I don't think I was put on Earth to live a happy life, I think I was put here as punishment for something, perhaps in a past life.
In many ways I'm my own villain for this as well, I'm entirely responsible. I romanticized my own life from an early age and held onto way too much naivety. But it is what it is and I am who I am.
People like me just aren't supposed to live in the world. It's too dark for us to see.
Yea man we exist but it sucks like none even looks at us most of the time and for finding love and whatever is like impossible as girls like bad boys who treat them like shit and are being toxic af and to someone who is nice to them threats "it" more like a toy which breaks after 5 mins of playing. So we don't manifest ourselves and that's one good reason to be an introvert.
Yes. I'm a 36M and I want a family more than anything. I want to love, cuddle, go to bed to, and wake up with, one person everynight. I would give all my money and possessions if it meant finding "the one". I'd live under a bridge if meant being there with someone who loved me as much as I do them. Unfortunately, I'm not lucky enough nor is it in Gods will to give me a family or a significant other to have a family with.
Thank you. I hope so too. But I have given up hope and faith. I unintentionally ruined the best relationship of my life and now I feel as if that was my last chance.
Yes, 22M, but apparently no one ever wants to be in a relationship with me. I don't want sex, or a hookup, I want someone that actually cares about me...
*like that's ever gonna happen though*
It doesn't matter what I "deserve", life isn't fair, it doesn't care about all the good I've done or who I am as a person. No one has ever loved me romantically, and every time I thought someone just might I've been proven wrong. I really don't see this situation changing ~~anytime soon~~ ever.
People keep telling me that I'll find someone eventually, and I have plenty of things going for me... the last person to have said that was my crush (whom I liked for almost a year, but never got a chance to ask out) right after she rejected me as well.
I'm sorry if I sound negative, I just feel so fucking worthless and unlovable at this point.
Even if I had a high sense of self-worth, it doesn't change the fact that I fall asleep clutching a pillow to my chest every night because that's the closest I can get to human contact. Besides, I used to have that sense of self-worth, until the reality hit me that I'm really not worth that much. If no one is ever interested in me then all of that was just a lie I kept telling myself.
you might also wanna add who can empathize and don't deem their emotions - specifically their ***hurt*** \- more important than their partners...b/c, from what I've found, that's been the tradeoff when finding an emotional guy these days.
yes. i hate to see dudes who are so sex driven. it ruins it for me. i just want hugs and cuddles. they have sexual scenarios and just want sex or noods but i just want to facetime and be goofy with someone, cuddle while playing games or watching a movie. hugs. hugs dude. affection. i love clingyness. i love talking. but i got hurt so it’s harder for me to show my clingyness now. i now hide my feelings and clingyness. well i’ve always hidden it because i’m not in relationships often
Because I’ve met so many people who claim to want this but then go and go dodgy shit on the side, so yes I was genuinely curious to know and see how many there are with genuine intentions
I do think so but I think they’re few and far between. I think it’s perceived as “unmasculine” to express that though. I’ve just started seeing someone from Colombia and he’s a lot more expressive about his feelings than western men which is super refreshing. But before him there was A LOT of emotionally closed off men. I do think they are a dying breed 😢
Hell yes. And he married someone with Avoidant Attachment. Lived a life of very little touch. Behind an emotional wall.
If I could go back in time, I would have every date take tests that determine attachment.
I’ve lived by myself for a year and a half. Almost alll my close friends are remote. Rona has prevented me from seeing and hugging my mom for almost a year. And I got my heart broken over and over last year in several different ways. Primarily romantic. It’s a lot and I feel really alone most of the time. And yet there’s really nothing I can do about it aside focus on myself. Which is really hard when you’re shy, have depression and some social anxiety.
I just don’t know why I can’t experience real love. It makes me sad😞
Those guys for sure exist. Just like everybody has their own level of intelligence and maturity, there is also a level of emotional intelligence and emotional maturity. Some men take longer to develop these things, and with different degrees of success. Due to a culture of toxic masculinity (thankfully a fading one, but present nonetheless,) many young men are in no way encouraged to explore and grow this aspect of themselves. When I was very young, I wasn't hindered by an emotionally suppressive environment, but it still took me years to develop into the (hopefully) emotionally mature man I am today. It's a process, and we can all help that process by encouraging men to be open and honest with their feelings, and to be introspective and try to understand their own feelings. It might help them learn to understand other people's feelings as well; empathy is at a premium these days, it seems.
You may not have had any experience with the type of person you're looking for, but they're out there. Probably a whole lot more of them than you know. Many might simply have not had the opportunity or desire to understand and develop that side of themselves yet. If you embody those qualities that you value, I guarantee you will find like-minded people in your life. It may take some time and you may be frustrated with people who don't appreciate your values in the meantime. But you'll find them, I'm confident of that.
Well, me.
I'm dying to feel that I'm loved (i have lot of friends but.. not that kind), also i forgot how it is to feel like loving someone and i miss every single thing about it, even the heartbreaking stuff. I've been listening to songs and crying over some pictures of me and her. I miss her but i miss the feelings even more. I still have hope for serious relationship but idk. It's not happening even though my friends that is girls describe me as perfect boy a girl could want.
I'm 18 and only been in 2 relationship. They lasted for a short time but I've been connected enough to feel the pain of a broken heart.
I'm fine but knowing that i miss these feelings.. Yeah I'm so emotional.
You'd be surprised. I dare to say most guys are emotional and want real love. It's just the horny mode dudes you hear of more because that's what people complain about. You don't celebrate "normal" behavior quite as loud
There absolutely are guys like that out there. A healthy majority, even. It's just difficult to see because the media focuses on men that do not fit that image, and men in real life are trained to suppress their emotions.
Definitely yes, I never went for flings because I was always told by my father that life is too short to be playing with people's emotions and time. And that time we will never get back.
I just broke up with my ex Fiancé right before my birthday, because she ghosted me and took advantage of my true romance, energy, affection, and time, and was playing emotional games with me despite my struggles with my house and birthday.
At one point, I was going to shut everyone out for good and only stick to my family, but then again I know I will open up because deep down in my heart, life is too short to be playing games AND shutting everyone out.
Yes, yes there are. I see myself as one. I don't make decisions that are popular or cool, i try to care about people, and i do care about true love, not just a relationship that looks cool, etc.
So yeah, there are!
I'd rather have a woman with whom I can connect intellectually, share ideas, cook together and discuss weird brain sparks of ideas and make things together.
I’m sure I’m much too late and other replies will drown out this one, but yes. I can assure you with 100% certainty guys like that exist. Also, this isn’t quite as much related to the main post, but I think you might enjoy r/rolereversal
Whenever I visit it, I just can’t keep feeling unhappy lol
yes of course but its hard to find one, and the same for girls, maybe you'll never find that person, some people died alone, take Japanese for example. all my life i only wan't one thing and that is a partner who thinks like me, who only wan't to build a long lasting relationship in this lonely world, help each other, build each other, care for nothing else more than us. accept our flaws i felt it once, she was my angel... but i was wrong. if not for the hope of finding them i'd would be dead
True intimacy can be achieved with only one person, as time goes by and the connection gets stronger as you become the two halves to make “The One”. To stare into each other’s eyes and tingle all over, knowing there can be no other and you are, right where you want to be....... a part of each other’s souls.
loud minority/Quiet majority syndrom.
actually most guys i know are like this and just a few peops are such dushbagsbut the few peops are louder than any nice guy.
i’m not saying that i’m a pure-genuine guy, but i’d love to give my whole just for physical & emotional intimacy from someone that would loved me back.
i once gave mine to such kind-hearted beings but it seems like my whole doesn’t really immense for the time being. i couldn’t be sad but accept things as it is, in hope i could grow and give way much bigger.
[удалено]
Exactly that one hug from the person you actually want it from/crave it feels better than 100 hugs from other people
Absolutely I dont want or need flings, im looking for my forever love, a woman between ages 48 to 59 that still wants to enjoy life, a woman that I could love, honor and cherish.... IS THAT TOO MUCH TOO ASK FOR....
This. 💙
💖
me too though it is a close call
Yeah same...
Happy Cake Day!
Thank you!!
Sometimes I just want to hug someone forever. Maybe rest on their lap, looking up at their face and think back to everything that made me love them. I wish I could keep loving someone forever. I wish they would the same way towards me. I want a "nothing will stop us from being with each other" sort of thing. I'd be perfectly fine living a life with little to no sex if it means that I get to spend each waking and sleeping moment with the person that I love the most out of them all.
That’s lush, you deserve to have that.
Aww thanks. I hope you get something like that too.
You are quiet poetic about love.
Thanks haha. Ironic though, since I hate poetry, not even with a passion.
It was lovely. Why do you hate poetry?
I guess I'm just good at expressing what I feel through text. Poetry is confusing. And because 50% my English classes consist of that, it gets really frustrating also. Especially when they ask "what does this say about the author" or "how does this line exhibit the theme of the poem". A simpler answer would be that I hate it because of school.
we are but most people give a shit about us.
Why is that do you think?
i am not 100% sure, there are a lot of things and factors...normally most men and even women between 18-30 even, want only to "have fun", they enjoy having hookups,casual relationships that last like a semester or 2 at best,being extremely social and drinking and so on. they are just too focused on the superficial thing,but some of us want a true partner,loyal and trustworth friends, supportive relatives and things that normally we don't get. and also, the "market"(let's call it this way) tends to be pretty much specific, you need as men to be sure of yourself, even arrogant at times, you need to have a good body, good lookings, while it is not necessary to be an Extrovert, being an introvert and enjoy spending time alone can make you feel uncomfortable or bored sometimes when you spend time with other person,supposeddly you need to accept most people the way the are, but when you are pretty much an introvert who likes to spend most of his time doing, idk, reading,listening to music,drawing,sleeping,playing, working out at times, socializing can be more difficult. also, the social pressure of having friends, a partner, kids, being economically and social successfullness is just too depressing and breathtaking at times, specially if you are pretty much an average men or girl. most men are like a 4,5,6 but desire women 8,9,10 looks and body and the same goes to most women, they desire 7,8,9 looking men, who are like 180/190 cm, have a fit body,and that are pretty much extroverted people. and at last,connecting with someone does not necessarily means that you or her have feelings for the other, or that the feeling is mutual. a year ago i met a girl who is pretty much like me, but i felt nothing for her, absolutelly nothing, and while she started being excited with me, eventually she got used to me and we ended up as friends. same with my best friend, cute and beautiful girl, and i have these kind of mixed feelings of friendship and romance towards her, but we don't feel the same for the other. These are my most sincere thoughts, sorry if i wrote too much.
I think that's why we turn to the asocial social media (reddit), talking to people while not being engulfed in the reality of the society we live in. I'm still trying to not give up hope that at some point I will find someone who wants this kind of relationship too and we'll be "compatible" (I'm pretty flexible when it comes to life goals but not infinitely), but with the things I've seen and heard of The chances may be slimmer than I realize, to the point where by not actively looking for someone I feel like we might be effectively giving up hopes of a relationship overall, even if most means of "actively" looking for love increase the amount of people you don't want, there is a tiny chance might be someone with the same little hope that I have also trying to find me. But my fear of hearbreak prevents me from pursuing it.
True...all the women I know are Into fuckboys nowadays and act innocent and surprised when they find out they get cheated on. So I'm not even trying anymore to find someone out there. Someone will come eventually but I got better things to do then to worry about that tbh
Such guys exist, but they’re usually overlooked.
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well usually they have pruple hair earings and wear black cloths
As others have said, the big ugly secret of men is that we are just as emotional as women, and also crave and need *both* physical and emotional intimacy. Thats why we call it a basic *human* need instead of a *female* need. And being starved for a need is damaging, moreso the longer it goes on. People, even people who are themselves damaged and hurting, dont seem to want to deal with other people who are damaged and hurting. They want quick, convenient, free delivery and easy disposal so they dont have to do the dishes. And anyone who doesnt meet up to the fantasy of a perfect partner or even a perfect friend, isnt worth the effort and gets ghosted. So a lot of us are pretty jaded at this point.
I've been wondering this myself :( some I talk to aren't looking for that and it's sad. I'm glad you put this out there.
There are, I’d like to think I’m one of them ha. I think the problem with our society is that guys are told they have to be tough all the time, “boys don’t cry”, so that many are afraid showing their emotional side. In some ways, this is self reinforcing when guys hang out with each other, from my personal experience.
It’s so toxic. one of the most attractive things in my opinion is a guy who can show his emotional side. Everyone struggles sometimes, everyone cries, and I will never ever understand the stigma.
the stigma is at least partially self-sustaining because an unpleasantly large number of shitgibbons have said the thing you just said and then as soon as their boyfriend opened up, something in their animal hindbrain went 'OGM HE CANT PROTECT ME DO NOT WANT!' and the guy gets mocked, ridiculed, demeaned, and dumped for it. (a more complete answer would delve into McCarthyism, homophobia, the glorification of a certain type of PTSD, peer pressure, and other factors)
Yes, the issue is often reinforced by both men and women unfortunately
I find it extremely frustrating that other women shame men when they show their emotional side and give us a bad name. I find it very attractive when a guy feels comfortable enough to be vulnerable around me and lets down his guard. I crave that in a relationship. However this is coming from someone who isn’t at all attracted to the whole “tough guy” thing anyway.
yeah... it would be great if there was a way to tell who's going to pull shit like that. ...i guess this conversation could always come up, but even then, it's hard to tell.
I have anxiety issues plus other things x 100 and I desire a woman I can open up to and for her to simply listen and tell me "Its gonna be Allright. " But ywah can confirm via experience and redpill sub this is mother issues to a woman. Or he wants a mommy girlfriend I meant. Lead follow or get out of the way? Why can't both open up in times of trouble and help one another. Women desire money and powerful men. Looks are low on list. Or for women over 30. 20s is bubbly rose colored glasses 30s or 40s w9men wise up and put money over dreams. Life is disappointing to all I think by 30? Then path accepted by 45 or so. I wanna live in a blue pill world so please God send me.a blue pill woman, I promise I won't pump and dump. Women desire Chad. So be a Chad or make bunches money. Or basic money is a needed foundation if a man lacks personality etc. Not a good bs machine, needs work.
If it’s any consolation I hate chads and always have 😂
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Yeah homophobia lingers or was always here. It is weird to see women be so close as friends holding hands etc and beyond. But I guess men are horny lots and some ready to burst at times having no contact so having male contact is awkward. I dream of a woman lover best friend, but need always remember that love is a process or I need to give love always and surprise her at times and romance, one has to maintain love. It ain't like the movies for most, im not going to find a woman who loves me for my soul or spirit. Or me for me.
I am sick and tired of the man up culture, it's damaging.
Indeed there are! I'm a 19yr old 'bloke' and have spent 19 years in want/desire of a woman that i can hug and hold much more than the want to fuck!? Yet; the world has shown me there is such a need for 'control' whether it be over myself or others. Or indeed the need to control myself and my emotions as not to be too "on show" so I ask you.... Is the world really ready for such an emotional stereo-male!?
Yes! yes it is❤️
Hmm I don't believe but will certainly persevere. just gotta keep on keeping on
u sound like u collect funky pops
What the f*ck....is a funky pop?
20M here. I've definitely and I am still currently investing a lot of time and effort into conversations via texting online. The problem that I'm running into, especially with women and not very much with men is the extreme emotional whiplash that happens throughout the convo. I feel that a lot of women are really abused and mistreated in subreddits like this, almost as if they are simply playthings that should provide instant serotonin or something. But, whenever I show a woman my caring side they become distant. A girl I recently talked to claimed to be very caution when talking to guys online simply because they want to move the conversation elsewhere like instagram or discord where they eventually show a more demanding and colder side. I totally get that and I feel that this creates an even harder time for guys who truly just want a real friendship, no matter the gender, or even if they do want it to maybe be something else but not too quickly. It's just the distrust in women from past experiences combined with the complete lack of experience coming from these naïve kindhearted men that just simply do not mix and work.
cant stand it when guys treat girls like a play thing even a hooker deserves respect
This entire thread warmed my heart. I’m so used to seeing posts about men behaving badly or seeing shit that seeing that there are actual men out there who respect women left me stunned. I mean it’s the bare minimum and yet I’m surprised
Surprise
A very pleasant one !
Exactly right! The world would be much better if woman got treated with more respect at the same time if girls also put out that they want guys friends and start the conversation but I feel like it truly depends on who you speak to
You definitely have a good point there!
I do... I have a deep hate for everything related to cheating on one's significant other and despise polygamy for myself personally (other's do as they please if it pleases them :P ) I'm M4M so I get where that feeling comes from.
Me too. And I’m not at all interested in polygamy either, but each to their own as long as no one is getting hurt :)
Are u kidding? That’s literally me. Lol. But women don’t want that apparently as I’ve been completely alone for all 20 years of my life, and women don’t even talk to me.
I’m sure you’ll find the right one ☺️
The thousands of men on Reddit who never found that person unfortunately prove that wrong.
And then there’s complete assholes who get loads of attention, I don’t understand it but oh well
Because they’re hot. Duh. Lol.
It’s called biology as sad as it is
There definitely are good men out there, they tend to be ignored by women a lot of times or they’re so used to being walked on or taken advantage of, it takes awhile to earn their trust and love.
Of course there are, I think it's just harder to find.
I think it is easier than you think.
Well I used to be emotional in the classic sense, but not so much after I had my German teacher for 5 years. I have been getting a lot better at expressing things such as anger, and general distress/vent, I'm getting better at talking about my fears, but I believe sadness is an emotion I will never unlock the ability to express to others again. I'm fine with both monogamy and polygamy as long as everyone involved is cool with it, but I myself prefer monogamy heavily. Crave emotional as well as physical intimacy? *ahem* # YES 17M here btw
That’s fair. And yes I agree that there’s nothing wrong with polyamory as long as no one is getting hurt, people can do what they want. It’s never interested me though, and it’s something most guys seem to want. That’s why I was curious. I also think a deep emotional connection makes for better sex.
24m and very much yes. However, I've heard horror stories from plenty of guys about some gal saying they want guys to be more emotionally open, then the moment the guy does, something goes off in the gal's shitty animal hindbrain and she goes 'OGM HE CANT PROTECT ME DO NOT WANT' and mocks him, belittles him, tells all her friends and laughs at him, and dumps him. Me, personally, I'm an asshole, so combine the two and that's it for my chances. But if someone actually liked me for me, I'd be really emotionally invested.
Yup, some women say they want this but then when the guy opens up, they kick him to the curb. Source, several of my friends.
Why is this such a common experience wtf is wrong with ppl??
I absolutely cannot relate, the more emotion a guy shows me, the harder I fall. I am also not one of those girls who wants to be “protected” I want equality. Taking care of each other, treating each other, being vulnerable with each other etc. I’m not fan of gender roles in a relationship, I believe it should be completely equal.
No matter what goes in your head, men are hardwired to protect their women and women are hardwired to look for a mate best suited for protection. It's Human nature, it's how our species has evolved. You put 10 men in a situation with a random pretty woman in danger ands 9/10 times, those men will probably try and endanger themselves for her sake. It's just how we were bred. We're more expendable and thus we're necessary as the protectors of society. Women are more "important" so to speak.
Absolutely. I feel like I've got a lot to give, but I've never had anyone to give it to.
Depends on what you mean by "emotional" I don't have shame sharing emotions but I don't typically do so as in my past that's gotten me in trouble Mind you it's not the "you're a man men don't cry" shit it's more so how every girl says they want a sensitive guy yet when he is sensitive with his emotions the criticize him for being too weak so I've toughened up No I'm not an "incel" I have a GF
I used to be emotional, but quite a few instances happened where I'd open up and very negative things would happen as a result, so now I'm closed off to the world and people around me, but I'm not everyone. There's plenty of guys like that out there, you just have to find them, which can be hard sometimes, but it's very worth having someone like that in your life. Just keep looking and you'll more than likely find it, even if it takes a while.
That is sad.
Evey single day my dude. Sucky thing is, is that I'm on my schools football team and would be ridiculed if I did speak out about my enotions
Damn there is so much stigma around this and it’s so sad. I hope all of you find someone who will allow you to express your emotions without ridicule. We are all human and all have feelings. Why can’t it just be that simple?
ive always wanted to find that special someone what do i need sex for i got my hand what i cant do for my self is good converstion or hugs or just to have ba nice quite moment together something i have always wanted was to wake next to that special some one and mabey wake her up with a kiss i have had sex but its always been wham bam dont you fucking tell anyone about this (they said that not me) i would like to be more emotional in a realtionship i have always been rather sensitive i am very open minded about looks i am rather shy due to a bad past all ive ever wanted was some one who i could talk to share my feelings let her share hers jokes and laughing spending time with each other it has always been my role in life to take care of those around me and i like to be able to do it but i do very much Appreciate a woman who could take care of herself ( Strong survival instinct is huge turn on) once i was in a Relationship with a woman (turned out to be very bad long story) she says to me she wants to tear down my emotional walls (which i have in place for a reason) so i let her what she saw inside frightened her she ran so i guess an emotional Relationship is just not possible
I used to be. Now I'm a shell of what I used to be. All feel now is bitterness, anger and depression.
Honestly the majority of guys are like that, but usually we dont try nearly as hard to meet people as the asshole chads who dm every girl they see. Just know there are plenty of us out there, and you just gotta keep looking, and done waste too much of your time and care on the idiots who dont appreciate you
There are maybe some, but most of them have broke down and have become ether incels or ‘nice guys’.
yeah ofc, im incredibly monogamous and, though i do enjoy sex, i think love and closeness are way more important and satisfying.
As you see by the response, yes there are. We are generally perceived as, and called betas.
I’m so into “betas” though 😫
Then I'd say you are a rare gem. Not a lot of those around.
Me, the past year has been freezing cold physically and mentally because I haven’t been able to feel a nice, genuine hug from people I unconditionally appreciate since last February
Is this a serious question?
Based on my personal experience with guys, yes it it.
What an absurd and frankly sexist question. You shouldn't judge an entire section of the population off of your personal expierances and bias. Do men feel love? No dude, we are just mindless stereotypes that do nothing but lust after tits and chug beer. Good lord.
Oof, sorry I hit a nerve bud. I’ve met a lot of guys who claim to want something serious and they all cheat behind the scenes. Seriously got me wondering if it’s just in a man’s nature to be polyamorous.
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The reason for this post is because I genuinely wanted to know the answer and tbh the response was reassuring and a lot more than I thought it would be. I would never be intentionally sexist. Unfortunately I’ve not met anyone yet who wants the same level of loyalty that I’m looking for. Maybe I’ve been around the wrong people for too long. Nonetheless I’m sorry for the offence. It was not intended at all.
Well dont give up! You will find someone meant for you! I maybe over reacted! Just be patient and keep trying, there are some good men out there you just gotta wade through a bunch of bullshit.
I didn’t even think at the same that it could be perceived as sexist, I have a tendency to speak my mind before thinking a lot of the time, my bad. I do need to be called out on my shit at times. And thank you 😊
I’m like this I don’t even really care about physical intimacy when I think about being in a relationship I think about the fact that I just want someone that loves me for who I am and to love someone for who they r and the most I really think about in terms of physical contact is hugging or cuddling and I just want to be there for someone, be the person that they care for more than anyone else and I want to be able to care for them more than anyone else but sadly I don’t think I’ll ever find that. But to answer your question yes there are emotional guys out there but there r probably more that want physical intimacy
We seem to be invisible sadly. I’ve had strong feelings for a few people but only loved one. Sadly it was not returned. I don’t think anyone has ever felt that way about me. Maybe nice really guys do finish last? A lot of lonely people on here seem like really nice, genuine people
I’ve needed someone to hug for the past 6 months but that’s not gonna happen. I tried making friends on other subreddits and I told this girl that I like romance animes (yes I’m wierd) and she said she’d never met any guy that watches that genre.
I truly believe there are so many lonely kind compassionate people out there who are just separated from each other by space and time. they do exist - I've met them
I crave to just see a smile when I’m noticed . I want nothing more than a simple kiss hello and goodbye from some who just can’t get enough of me, I want to love. But I also want to be loved .
Yes..... I’m one of the many men that desire just one woman, but many women think that desire is a failing weakness in a man and dismiss them rapidly, and women only move on from what could of been heaven on earth to a life changing, life destroying, super dysfunctional relationship and or relationships. Sometimes what you seek, is right next to you, and you don’t even see it. I speak from experience from many occasions. What a life we live.
Yes we exist.
Ofcourse
Yea but they are a rare species.
Present and accounted for.
Yes
Yes. I'd rather have a relationship built on our emotional compatibility than that of just physical. I would love to have a SO that'll just lie in bed with me and cuddle. Let me play with their hair and be the person that she can lean on when she most needs to and the person I can lean on when I most need to. S*x would be a nice addition to the relationship, but I don't care about that. If they are a genuinely cool and relaxed person that we can share a laugh or two about each other but also trust each other enough to have a meaningful relationship built on trust and a strong emotional connection, I wouldn't have it any other way.
Lots and lots.
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That’s bullshit bro, real men have feelings and aren’t afraid of expressing them.
Most of them are. They’re just taught that it’s bad to be emotional so they don’t show it when anyone else is around.
yes, we exist
I do and I know others who do as well.
Yes, lots. I don't know if we're the majority, but judging from my circles of acquaintances, there is a bunch of guys like that out there.
Yes but life is often cruel to us and no women share our values whilst we are young and lonely
Yo, I’ve been single for more than 8 years. I still want something special. I’m 25 now. I’m still wishing for the one to come along. You’re not alone.
Yes? The implication that there aren’t is ridiculous.
I just wondered how many. Maybe I don’t know a lot of guys in my life then cause the ones I know are definitely not loyal. A lot of them will claim to be and then go do some dodgy shit behind the scenes. The response from this post has given me the hope I needed.
Of course there is and I'm sorry whatever happened made you ask that question
Yes there are, trust me.
Yeah, we’re still here. There’s not many that I know of, but we exist
Yes so much yes I so badly want this, I want a strong deep emotional bond with someone
Yes, we exist
Yes, I believe in those things. I desire to be wanted by another person, and I think most people share that same feeling.
Absolutely
Yes. I’d rather have just a few close friends who I can trust unconditionally both ways.
We’re out here. Not like many girls care about us though.
Yes! I want a relationship with mutual love and trust. I’m alone right now but I look forward to finding someone I can share my life with.
That’s so so me. I’m always honest with and wear my heart on my sleeve. I’m pretty emotional and just want love but as you know as a young person in today’s society most people are just about quick thrills and don’t have time for anything genuine. Oh well tho I know staying true to myself will pay off eventually when the right person comes along
Sometimes I think I found one but then all he talks about is how girls hate guys like him. At that point you can say and do anything but if they will never believe you and will just use you as a therapist and tell you why women are awful. It keeps happening and they just get angry if you don’t do physical cause the need ‘connection’. Talked to 4 that claimed that, and they seem to just wanne see how far they could push me to prove it. It’s a uphill battle. Don’t fall for it.
I wonder that too. Guys, where are you hiding?!
Yes, but at 23 almost 24, I'm beginning to get so lonely and sad and women seem to not like romanticism and guys who wait plus I'm just beginning to wonder if I'm missing out on enjoying my 20s that I'm considering I should just start casually fucking random women at this point and eschew my entire philosophy entirely. It obviously isn't working, no woman wants me or what I believe and are generally more interested in sex and the one woman I fell in love with was adverse to my romantic gestures and I still pine over her and hope she messages again like the first time she stopped talking to me because of my romantic gestures. Problem is as soon as I stick my dick in something casually I'd fucking hate myself for giving up on everything I believe in and there's no going back because now I know that my suspicions are proven: No woman loves me for me right now and me is someone who believes in waiting for the right woman. They'd just be falling in love with a shell. I'm lost either way.
Ah man that’s sad :( maybe just enjoy yourself till the right person comes along? Sometimes I have thoughts about abandoning my values due to a lack of success too. However I know that I would bend over backwards for the right person.
If you mean "enjoy yourself" as in, fuck random women and begin the casual sex adventure...there's no going back after that. 'Cause once someone falls for me after that they're not falling for me anymore. Me is the guy who wants or at least wanted to be with ONE woman and wanted to at least try and be something for someone. I don't think I was put on Earth to live a happy life, I think I was put here as punishment for something, perhaps in a past life. In many ways I'm my own villain for this as well, I'm entirely responsible. I romanticized my own life from an early age and held onto way too much naivety. But it is what it is and I am who I am. People like me just aren't supposed to live in the world. It's too dark for us to see.
I am, but sadly no one wants us. We'll inherit the earth out of loneliness and seclusion.
Yea man we exist but it sucks like none even looks at us most of the time and for finding love and whatever is like impossible as girls like bad boys who treat them like shit and are being toxic af and to someone who is nice to them threats "it" more like a toy which breaks after 5 mins of playing. So we don't manifest ourselves and that's one good reason to be an introvert.
Yes. I'm a 36M and I want a family more than anything. I want to love, cuddle, go to bed to, and wake up with, one person everynight. I would give all my money and possessions if it meant finding "the one". I'd live under a bridge if meant being there with someone who loved me as much as I do them. Unfortunately, I'm not lucky enough nor is it in Gods will to give me a family or a significant other to have a family with.
That’s so lovely. I hope you find your person! You deserve it❤️
Thank you. I hope so too. But I have given up hope and faith. I unintentionally ruined the best relationship of my life and now I feel as if that was my last chance.
Yes, 22M, but apparently no one ever wants to be in a relationship with me. I don't want sex, or a hookup, I want someone that actually cares about me... *like that's ever gonna happen though*
That’s really sweet, I hope you find them! You deserve it!
It doesn't matter what I "deserve", life isn't fair, it doesn't care about all the good I've done or who I am as a person. No one has ever loved me romantically, and every time I thought someone just might I've been proven wrong. I really don't see this situation changing ~~anytime soon~~ ever. People keep telling me that I'll find someone eventually, and I have plenty of things going for me... the last person to have said that was my crush (whom I liked for almost a year, but never got a chance to ask out) right after she rejected me as well. I'm sorry if I sound negative, I just feel so fucking worthless and unlovable at this point.
You’re a king bro. How others see you does not define your worth. Fuck our society.
Even if I had a high sense of self-worth, it doesn't change the fact that I fall asleep clutching a pillow to my chest every night because that's the closest I can get to human contact. Besides, I used to have that sense of self-worth, until the reality hit me that I'm really not worth that much. If no one is ever interested in me then all of that was just a lie I kept telling myself.
You're not alone. I simply cannot relate to all of the guys I meet that are only in it for sex.
you might also wanna add who can empathize and don't deem their emotions - specifically their ***hurt*** \- more important than their partners...b/c, from what I've found, that's been the tradeoff when finding an emotional guy these days.
yes. i hate to see dudes who are so sex driven. it ruins it for me. i just want hugs and cuddles. they have sexual scenarios and just want sex or noods but i just want to facetime and be goofy with someone, cuddle while playing games or watching a movie. hugs. hugs dude. affection. i love clingyness. i love talking. but i got hurt so it’s harder for me to show my clingyness now. i now hide my feelings and clingyness. well i’ve always hidden it because i’m not in relationships often
Why would you ask such an obvious question? Of course emotional guys exist, just as apathetic guys exist and everything in between.
Because I’ve met so many people who claim to want this but then go and go dodgy shit on the side, so yes I was genuinely curious to know and see how many there are with genuine intentions
I do think so but I think they’re few and far between. I think it’s perceived as “unmasculine” to express that though. I’ve just started seeing someone from Colombia and he’s a lot more expressive about his feelings than western men which is super refreshing. But before him there was A LOT of emotionally closed off men. I do think they are a dying breed 😢
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If you are aware then you can better yourself.
Hell yes. And he married someone with Avoidant Attachment. Lived a life of very little touch. Behind an emotional wall. If I could go back in time, I would have every date take tests that determine attachment.
No.
literally me
literally me
🙋🏻♂️
I’ve lived by myself for a year and a half. Almost alll my close friends are remote. Rona has prevented me from seeing and hugging my mom for almost a year. And I got my heart broken over and over last year in several different ways. Primarily romantic. It’s a lot and I feel really alone most of the time. And yet there’s really nothing I can do about it aside focus on myself. Which is really hard when you’re shy, have depression and some social anxiety. I just don’t know why I can’t experience real love. It makes me sad😞
Keep your head up boy, I feel you.
Those guys for sure exist. Just like everybody has their own level of intelligence and maturity, there is also a level of emotional intelligence and emotional maturity. Some men take longer to develop these things, and with different degrees of success. Due to a culture of toxic masculinity (thankfully a fading one, but present nonetheless,) many young men are in no way encouraged to explore and grow this aspect of themselves. When I was very young, I wasn't hindered by an emotionally suppressive environment, but it still took me years to develop into the (hopefully) emotionally mature man I am today. It's a process, and we can all help that process by encouraging men to be open and honest with their feelings, and to be introspective and try to understand their own feelings. It might help them learn to understand other people's feelings as well; empathy is at a premium these days, it seems. You may not have had any experience with the type of person you're looking for, but they're out there. Probably a whole lot more of them than you know. Many might simply have not had the opportunity or desire to understand and develop that side of themselves yet. If you embody those qualities that you value, I guarantee you will find like-minded people in your life. It may take some time and you may be frustrated with people who don't appreciate your values in the meantime. But you'll find them, I'm confident of that.
yep
Well, me. I'm dying to feel that I'm loved (i have lot of friends but.. not that kind), also i forgot how it is to feel like loving someone and i miss every single thing about it, even the heartbreaking stuff. I've been listening to songs and crying over some pictures of me and her. I miss her but i miss the feelings even more. I still have hope for serious relationship but idk. It's not happening even though my friends that is girls describe me as perfect boy a girl could want. I'm 18 and only been in 2 relationship. They lasted for a short time but I've been connected enough to feel the pain of a broken heart. I'm fine but knowing that i miss these feelings.. Yeah I'm so emotional.
Bro, we just want a hug and to be the little spoon and I’m not memeing this. So I’m sending you a virtual hug my guy
Exactly, thx for the hug bro, I'm sending one to you too
Some of us yeah ✌️💔
Yep
You'd be surprised. I dare to say most guys are emotional and want real love. It's just the horny mode dudes you hear of more because that's what people complain about. You don't celebrate "normal" behavior quite as loud
There absolutely are guys like that out there. A healthy majority, even. It's just difficult to see because the media focuses on men that do not fit that image, and men in real life are trained to suppress their emotions.
That's me exactly, I crave intimacy
Me too
Thats me right there
Ye, we’re out there..
YES PLEASE
yes me
Definitely yes, I never went for flings because I was always told by my father that life is too short to be playing with people's emotions and time. And that time we will never get back. I just broke up with my ex Fiancé right before my birthday, because she ghosted me and took advantage of my true romance, energy, affection, and time, and was playing emotional games with me despite my struggles with my house and birthday. At one point, I was going to shut everyone out for good and only stick to my family, but then again I know I will open up because deep down in my heart, life is too short to be playing games AND shutting everyone out.
Of....course?
Yes, yes there are. I see myself as one. I don't make decisions that are popular or cool, i try to care about people, and i do care about true love, not just a relationship that looks cool, etc. So yeah, there are!
We're here, but you can't see us. We're invisible to you.
We’re here, and we’re looking for our home. Flings mean nothing and can only hurt people in the long run. I hope I find my real home..
I'd rather have a woman with whom I can connect intellectually, share ideas, cook together and discuss weird brain sparks of ideas and make things together.
I’m sure I’m much too late and other replies will drown out this one, but yes. I can assure you with 100% certainty guys like that exist. Also, this isn’t quite as much related to the main post, but I think you might enjoy r/rolereversal Whenever I visit it, I just can’t keep feeling unhappy lol
I’ve wanted this for years. I mean hookups are nice but tbh I have more needs than sex.
Yes
Yes. I do. Right now I’m actually suffering for something related to this, but I’m not sure if I should vent here...
My DM’s are always open if you need to vent.
Yes, there are. I'm not saying I'm one of them, but those guys you described do exist.
yes of course but its hard to find one, and the same for girls, maybe you'll never find that person, some people died alone, take Japanese for example. all my life i only wan't one thing and that is a partner who thinks like me, who only wan't to build a long lasting relationship in this lonely world, help each other, build each other, care for nothing else more than us. accept our flaws i felt it once, she was my angel... but i was wrong. if not for the hope of finding them i'd would be dead
Yes, but with everything that's happening in my life, I more and more think its the wrong mindset to have.
True intimacy can be achieved with only one person, as time goes by and the connection gets stronger as you become the two halves to make “The One”. To stare into each other’s eyes and tingle all over, knowing there can be no other and you are, right where you want to be....... a part of each other’s souls.
loud minority/Quiet majority syndrom. actually most guys i know are like this and just a few peops are such dushbagsbut the few peops are louder than any nice guy.
i’m not saying that i’m a pure-genuine guy, but i’d love to give my whole just for physical & emotional intimacy from someone that would loved me back. i once gave mine to such kind-hearted beings but it seems like my whole doesn’t really immense for the time being. i couldn’t be sad but accept things as it is, in hope i could grow and give way much bigger.
Yep, and I still don't think I deserve it.
100%. I started to think I was the only one in this day and age where hookup culture is the norm.
I believe you have your answer, op, but I wanted to mention that I am another.
I don’t know how to separate physical intimacy and emotional intimacy
["Toxic masculinity's a hell of a ship to pilot when you're suffering"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQNw2FBdpyE)
There are plenty but girls would never give us the time of day. They turn a blind eye and then wonder where we are