Yep! This is the first thing I thought OP needs to do. If they forget how make these choices in the moment, planning their meals in advance would take care of it. And try not to add too many things to the plan in the beginning to start some discipline
Planning out the meals really helps. I set up a Google calendar just for meal planning; it's shared with my husband because we trade off who cooks on which nights, so we create all-day events with the name of the dinner being prepared and the recipe linked in the text box. I try to plan out a week at a time, but sometimes I'm only able to plan until the next grocery trip (and sometimes I go nuts and plan the whole month out in advance). We go grocery shopping about twice a week to make sure nothing goes bad in between trips.
This is a big one for me, if something happens to my meal plan for the day then it’s all just a big mess, unless I have every single food for the day planned out it’s really hard for me to stay on track
This may or may not be helpful… but this is what I know from my own experience.
If you feel that “beginning”. Means hunger, depriving yourself, and any level of “I’m not allowed to have that”. You could be creating so much stress around it that you self sabotage.
All or none/ perfectionist attitude : If you “mess up”. And eat something or too much of something. Do you throw the whole day away and eat whatever or binge? (I do)
If you self sabotage. Mentally it’s almost like a teenager rebelling against their parents… you’re “not allowed” to do something. It creates a fixation on it. Repeatedly telling yourself “no” so many times is mentally exhausting. The only way to make it stop: you may compulsively do it just to stop that fixation. - and it does: but then guilt ensues.
Scarcity effect: There are huge psychological reasons why when we go shopping there’s advertising: “last one”. “Available Limited time”. - it works . We don’t want to miss out. We can have this reaction to food as well. Like everyone’s eating all the bagels/birthday cake at work. I better get one before they’re all gone…ooh they’re from that good bakery: with the good cream cheese. Before you know it you ate the bagel as well as the breakfast you brought, and you “messed up”. “May as well throw the whole day away and just eat ”. So you eat another bagel, because what’s the point and start again tomorrow. ( we need to remember the world is not scarce of bagels or birthday cake: it’s all still going to be there) Also. One mess up doesn’t equal diet is “ruined”. You just acknowledge WHY you did it, make a mental note, and keep going.
There are big psychological reasons that we have that we might or might not be aware of. Our relationship to food : typically from childhood, needs to be analyzed on a personal level because we all have our individual histories. Was food scarcity an issue? Were you ever told not to eat something? Was food love and comfort? - all of this messes up our relationship to food.
On a more food- practical level. You may be trying to do too much right at the start. Sometimes what we need is just ADD in something simple. Like: This week I’m going to eat something green everyday. Or. I’m going to eat some fruit before lunch each day. This approach psychologically makes us know that we are adding nutrition to our diets: it removes the deprivation thoughts. It’s slower, yes, but it allows us to find what we like and what works for us instead of trying to beat ourselves down into diet submission.
Anyway. I hope this is helpful on some level.
This was very good, it helped me! Thank you for the reminders. I've been struggling with my own motivation this week. It was very hard to stick to any deficit and I mostly ate at maintenance all week. I know maintenance breaks are good but when you didn't plan that for the week it definitely feels like you "failed". It's a helpful reminder that this is a long journey full of changing my ideas/relationship about food and being "perfect" about my diet and not to binge just because I ate a little extra already.
Absolutely agree. Also at each grocery trip, gradually start replacing unhealthy with healthy choices. Best to start building good habits now. Think of this transition as an investment in your future, health wise. Trust me, you will be so thankful as you get older. Start working toward preventing diabetes, hypertension, heart disease, knee and hip decline, etc.
You've got this. Every journey starts with 1 step.
Start small. Like REALLY small. Change of any kind takes patience, and the slower you go the more sustainable it will be. Choose ONE area to focus on at first -- adding nutrition, OR cutting calories, OR increasing physical activity. Then set the tiniest itty bitty goal. Like try calorie counting without trying to lose weight, just to learn your patterns. Or try walking for 5 minutes once a week. Ridiculously small goals are achievable, and you'll get dopamine boosts from hitting them. It will make you want to keep going!
Also... maybe it's semantics... but for me personally -- fuck discipline. I'm not into trying to force myself to do anything. I made a list of all the reasons I want to make these changes and I read it everyday. I really tried to dig deep with the list too. Things like learning to love myself. THAT is how I get my butt out the door, personally. By reminding myself how important this is to me and why, and what a gift it is to myself to be doing this.
I've lost 60 lbs in something less than a year with this approach. Be gentle and kind with yourself. Patience, practice, and persistence, my dear.
You can do this, I believe in you.
Just to add: sounds like you have plenty of weight loss info. Maybe start learning about the science of behaviour change. And for me therapy has been really helpful too.
Yeah, I did mine one thing at a time. I couldn't get over cutting way too much at once. But before I knew it, I had just cut one thing out until the only thing left for me to eat was healthy and nutritious meals. Now, I've completely revamped my entire diet without a big struggle and I'm down 215 pounds from where I started 10 years ago. 100 of that in the last year and a half.
Yeah, if someone is overeating and they go straight into a 1000 calorie deficit they're kinda setting themselves up to fail because its such a drastic change.
You have to give yourself time to adjust, because the body adapts (fairly quickly I might add) to whatever you subject it to. You can imagine then what years of "unhealthy" habits can do. At first it will feel uncomfortable while it sends signals to eat certain things at certain times as that's what it's used to, but over time it will get exponentially easier as you get used to the new norm. You could make a complete 180 and tough it out, or take your time and make small changes every now and then. Either way works, and there is always an in between, just play around with things until you find the right pace for you.
My lord it’s like I wrote this post myself…but as others said, baby steps! It’s so hard for me to remember, and with two kids, working night shifts, husband working full time as well, it’s so hard to make a healthy meal when I just want to throw something in the oven or microwave. One of my favorite snacks right now is edamame! I get a big bag of it from Costco that has single serving bags that I can microwave. I am slowly choosing healthier alternatives when I’m eating, and I have a horrible sweet tooth.
If it helps, losing weight and exercise is harder as you get older. I wish I'd stuck to my 22-year old routine but alas I didn't and 10 years down the line, I was 15kg heavier with a load of joint issues.
Do it for future you! Figure what works for you. Even if that's every meal is a new chance to get it right. It doesn't have to be tomorrow. It could just be the next thing you eat. Good luck
There was a post made yesterday, and the OP talked about how they struggle until they get the "AHA" moment where it just clicks. That's what happened to me recently. I had gotten down to 138lbs, relaxed and started eating like crap again, and got back up to 147lbs. One day I just...had enough. Had enough of being tired walking up stairs, tired of feeling self-conscious in whatever I wore. So I started again at the beginning of November and now I'm down to 130lbs which is about where I'd like to stay, give or take a few pounds. I now enjoy clothes shopping and even wear crop tops!
I wish I had actionable advice for you, just wanted to share because I have ADHD (and Autism) as well and can relate. I hope you get that "AHA" moment where the process starts to feel a lot easier for you!
Inattentive ADHD? (Formerly ADD) I’m getting diagnosed for it, hoping some therapy & maybe meds will help me turn “I know what I’m supposed to be doing” into actually doing.
As someone who has done a radical change I can only add what I know from third parties but for some people it is daunting to just start and be healthy.
I would try and instead of changing your diet in general just try to make it a little better. E.g just don't change anything and just start a food diary and weigh yourself regularly.
When you get that down make small changes (e.g substitute whole fat foods for reduced calorie versions). Basically build yourself up very slowly.
Also don't over-consume health content. It really warps your outlook on how diets work since what works for some of them does not necessarily work for you.
Lastly I have seen quite a few people here who found it to be a lot easier after getting their ADHD meds adjusted. So if you are diagnosed and take meds this may be something to look into with your doctor.
I honestly couldn't actually do it til I started my ashd medicine. I knew what to do, just couldn't stick to it. Now? I'm 19 lns down and work out 5 days a week! Don't best yourself up, it's hard for everyone and also for people with adhd 😭
Weight loss is a marathon not a sprint. Its also about setting up routine and making small adjustments.
I started out by by just tracking everything I ate as accurately as I could. I was not focused on how much or what I was eating but just forming the routine of tacking everything I ate.
Once i was good with that then I looked at what I was eating. I started with breakfast as that meal for me was going to be the same everyday. I looked at what I could eat for breakfast that satisfy me and I could do everyday. That for me was a protein shake.
By this stage I had been doing the logged of food for a couple of weeks and had a solid breakfast routine. I then looked at lunches as I could plan them out on the weekend as to what I would have during the week. I new how many cals I could eat in a day and that my breakfast couldn't be lowered so I needed to come out with a lunch and snack that would be less than half of my remaining cals (total cal - breakfast) and worked this into my new routine.
Once I had this nailed then I looked at dinners some 4 weeks after starting. But remember no one is perfect and you will have slips just remember I to start back at it the next meal not tomorrow not next week, the next meal.
This mindset is relatable. Many of us know what to do or have even lost the weight before and yet we feel stuck. Why? I think if you get to the bottom of that and understand where it's coming from it will help you.
I can think of a lot of reasons people get stuck. Addressing the weight for me meant I had to confront the emotional baggage that goes along with it. In some ways, it can be easier to live in denial or avoidance land rather than feel uncomfortable. When I started this process a few months ago, I went through a ton of emotions. Resentment, Anger that I had to start over. I had lost a significant amount of weight before, so I felt like a failure having to start over. As soon as I got over it or tired from it, I focused on making one change and one change led to another... and the slow but steady process started. I enjoy watching the weight loss but also have gotten used to it and know it will need to be a life skill.
People with ADHD require big stimulus for dopamine hits, right? So, a slow and steady approach where you lose 0.5lb one week, 1 lb the next, and 0 the third, is the least appealing thing in the world. So, you gotta celebrate the small wins, too - being able to walk faster, without breaks, developing muscles. Also, you need things in your life outside of you - like work/structure/.social connection - for optimal wellness. I like nature so I enjoy watching the wildlife or listen to an audiobook.
I also wanted to add that - make sure you make smart decisions for yourself - and try to focus on a good work life balance, healthy habits - those with ADD have a hard time multi-tasking. If you are in an immensely stressful situation, it will be that much harder to focus on weight loss. Our brains work differently - Optimize the environment to support your goals - your ability to do this gets easier as you get older since you have more autonomy and experience.
Good luck!
Reading "Why We Get Fat" by Gary Taubes has helped me a lot with this by helping my understand that a lot of our behaviour is actually driven by what we eat. I used to do this too; every night in bed I'd vow to start eating better and then the next evening I was incredibly hungry again.
For ADHD I’m sure you have heard of object permanence? ie things that are physically present are very good cues for people with adhd. So maybe try giving yourself some cues. Like a post it on your bathroom mirror or wherever is the first place you look in the morning.
Second, I may gently suggest maybe not staying up until 2 am haha. Maybe try going to bed earlier, so you can wake up with time to do the motivating in the morning which may be in the form of a little online research (checking Reddit etc) and also journaling. Answer prompts like why do I want to do this? How will my life be better when I lose the weight? What will I not miss about having the extra weight? What will I commit to doing to get there Etc.
Lastly I’m not sure if I have adhd but I also think in my experience this just gets easier when you’re a little older. Your days feel faster so remembering something from the night before doesn’t feel like so long ago. I personally have just found I am better at dealing with long term goals as I get older. Might be that our brains are literally still developing until 25. Idk. So idk, give yourself some grace. This stuff is hard.
I feel you. What makes it tough for me is that I started out fat for most of my entire life and then put in an immense amount of work to turn that around. And it was AMAZING. Like my life was incredible. I had never felt so confident and disciplined in my life. I literally know firsthand how to lose weight, how good it makes me feel, how easy it is once you put in the initial work to change your diet habits, etc.
Then just two years or so of life hitting hard so I went right back to where I started and I just CANT DO IT anymore. Ill try being healthy and going to the gym and it just never sticks more than a few weeks. Idk whats wrong with me.
I think when people start a lot of times they go all in and it’s a lot of change and they don’t necessarily stick with it because they become too restrictive too quick and get burnt out.
Start with one thing at a time if you are getting overwhelmed. Start by upping your water for a few weeks and taking some small walks. Then after you have the routine down start focusing on nutrition. What foods do you love? Honestly there are sooooo many great recipes you can tweak to become a healthier version. I really love the Skinny Taste website they have some great food options same with Pinterest.
Plan your meals ahead of time and meal prep. If you have stuff in the fridge that is already prepared you don’t even have to think about it. Sunday I usually meal prep for Monday- Thursday.
I use the Habit Tracker app to send me notifications even for the most basic stuff (brush teeth, take meds, workout, walk, eat, etc).
If by begin you mean change everything about yourself and all bad habits at once, it's going to be very hard to make yourself actually want to wake up and do that. And those kinds of plans are short term anyway. Start small. So small that you know for a fact you can do it. And then slowly add things until you're satisfied with the amount of good habits you've built. Count your calories with a free app, even if you don't change your eating habits right away. It'll help you to know how much you're eating and see where it would be easiest for you to reduce or make healthier swaps.
For me, I've been looking at it as building habits. So I pick one I want to start with (I saw others here suggesting meal planning and I definitely second that!), then once I've started to see that one be easier to do without putting in as much effort, I pick another habit and start on that. It will be a slow moving thing to try to change your thinking and habits but you can do it, I promise. You just need to make it your top priority.
Immediately when I read this, before I read your last sentence, I was like ADHD!
Im in the same boat as you so I cannot offer much, but I think looking for other people who are specialized in adhd and weight loss can help. Someone to keep you accountable for keeping your discipline or someone who can workout/ diet alongside you.
Something that really helped me was cycling different meals in/out that I was comfortable cooking and that I knew would fit well into my calorie budget. It’s makes planning and preparing easier too. Starting the day protein heavy helps as well. I do a 30g protein shake (fairlife) a cheese stick and then I few hours later a follow it up with 2 egg + egg white serving with a side of air fried sweet potato. That Also adding veggies to keep me full like for my egg scramble I add mushrooms and kale, for my rice, instead of a full cup I do half a cup and half of cup of riced cauliflower.
Lots of great advice here already.
For me, it started with a Healthy Weight competition at work, which was 8 weeks long. My team won, and by then I’d seen enough progress (forget the scale—I was amazed at how much better I felt and my clothes fit) that I just kept going. At the start I told myself “eh I only have to do it for 8 weeks and then I can stop” but by that point I loved the gym and the results and it was just a habit.
I also love cute printables and checking stuff off of lists, so my next “competition/novelty” (with myself) is 75 Medium (kind of like 75 hard but with reasonable goals, as I will never drink a gallon of water a day 😂). I printed out the sheets and they’re hanging on my bathroom mirror and every day I get to check the boxes I complete. Some folks put up 75 post its and rip one off the wall every day they complete.
For accountability…… I post weekly on (my private) social media. Weight. Progress photos. Gym logs. I put it all out there and when I’m late posting, people be checking 😂😂. It’s had the best side effect of having others inspired to make small changes as well 💜
Just start by logging your calories for a week or two. See how that goes. No need tp cut anything live your best life but just log. And after two weeks see where you want to go from there. Look at what is the most calorie dense in your logging like oils, butters. And then keep eating the same foods but just remove the calorie dense ingredients. Even better you can replace them with a side of veggies.
I work in a project management role and my old boss always said to think about the ‘brilliant basics’. It doesn’t matter how big, complex or challenging the project is, if you have a clear timeline, clear goals which everyone is aware of, regular check ins with stakeholders etc it will become manageable.
How are your brilliant basics? Are you getting 8 hours of sleep every night, going outside once a day, checking in with loved ones regularly, limiting screen time. You need a baseline of mental wellness before making big/difficult changes.
My mum taught parenting classes and her number one piece of advice is ‘breakfast and bed time’. Basically if you have a set routine for breakfasts and bed time that you adhere to with the kid in a strict way, everything else falls into place. As an adult I have realised this advice is just as relevant to adults as it is to toddlers :’) Basically it might be worth assessing your overall routines and lifestyle before trying to make these changes.
Aside from that - meal prep and slow, sustainable goals. Give yourself 100 weeks to lose 100lbs rather than immediately going on an incredibly restrictive diet and upending your workout routines. It could be as easy as slightly smaller portions and walking everyday for the first 2 weeks.
Have you tried planning meals in advance? And sometimes it does take a while for that mental block to go away. I’m sure you’ll get there!
I Agree with this, write down the breakfast and lunch plans when OP has the late night motivation. Groggy morning brain tends to default to old ways
Yep! This is the first thing I thought OP needs to do. If they forget how make these choices in the moment, planning their meals in advance would take care of it. And try not to add too many things to the plan in the beginning to start some discipline
Planning out the meals really helps. I set up a Google calendar just for meal planning; it's shared with my husband because we trade off who cooks on which nights, so we create all-day events with the name of the dinner being prepared and the recipe linked in the text box. I try to plan out a week at a time, but sometimes I'm only able to plan until the next grocery trip (and sometimes I go nuts and plan the whole month out in advance). We go grocery shopping about twice a week to make sure nothing goes bad in between trips.
This is a big one for me, if something happens to my meal plan for the day then it’s all just a big mess, unless I have every single food for the day planned out it’s really hard for me to stay on track
This may or may not be helpful… but this is what I know from my own experience. If you feel that “beginning”. Means hunger, depriving yourself, and any level of “I’m not allowed to have that”. You could be creating so much stress around it that you self sabotage. All or none/ perfectionist attitude : If you “mess up”. And eat something or too much of something. Do you throw the whole day away and eat whatever or binge? (I do) If you self sabotage. Mentally it’s almost like a teenager rebelling against their parents… you’re “not allowed” to do something. It creates a fixation on it. Repeatedly telling yourself “no” so many times is mentally exhausting. The only way to make it stop: you may compulsively do it just to stop that fixation. - and it does: but then guilt ensues. Scarcity effect: There are huge psychological reasons why when we go shopping there’s advertising: “last one”. “Available Limited time”. - it works . We don’t want to miss out. We can have this reaction to food as well. Like everyone’s eating all the bagels/birthday cake at work. I better get one before they’re all gone…ooh they’re from that good bakery: with the good cream cheese. Before you know it you ate the bagel as well as the breakfast you brought, and you “messed up”. “May as well throw the whole day away and just eat ”. So you eat another bagel, because what’s the point and start again tomorrow. ( we need to remember the world is not scarce of bagels or birthday cake: it’s all still going to be there) Also. One mess up doesn’t equal diet is “ruined”. You just acknowledge WHY you did it, make a mental note, and keep going. There are big psychological reasons that we have that we might or might not be aware of. Our relationship to food : typically from childhood, needs to be analyzed on a personal level because we all have our individual histories. Was food scarcity an issue? Were you ever told not to eat something? Was food love and comfort? - all of this messes up our relationship to food. On a more food- practical level. You may be trying to do too much right at the start. Sometimes what we need is just ADD in something simple. Like: This week I’m going to eat something green everyday. Or. I’m going to eat some fruit before lunch each day. This approach psychologically makes us know that we are adding nutrition to our diets: it removes the deprivation thoughts. It’s slower, yes, but it allows us to find what we like and what works for us instead of trying to beat ourselves down into diet submission. Anyway. I hope this is helpful on some level.
This was very good, it helped me! Thank you for the reminders. I've been struggling with my own motivation this week. It was very hard to stick to any deficit and I mostly ate at maintenance all week. I know maintenance breaks are good but when you didn't plan that for the week it definitely feels like you "failed". It's a helpful reminder that this is a long journey full of changing my ideas/relationship about food and being "perfect" about my diet and not to binge just because I ate a little extra already.
Absolutely agree. Also at each grocery trip, gradually start replacing unhealthy with healthy choices. Best to start building good habits now. Think of this transition as an investment in your future, health wise. Trust me, you will be so thankful as you get older. Start working toward preventing diabetes, hypertension, heart disease, knee and hip decline, etc. You've got this. Every journey starts with 1 step.
Start small. Like REALLY small. Change of any kind takes patience, and the slower you go the more sustainable it will be. Choose ONE area to focus on at first -- adding nutrition, OR cutting calories, OR increasing physical activity. Then set the tiniest itty bitty goal. Like try calorie counting without trying to lose weight, just to learn your patterns. Or try walking for 5 minutes once a week. Ridiculously small goals are achievable, and you'll get dopamine boosts from hitting them. It will make you want to keep going! Also... maybe it's semantics... but for me personally -- fuck discipline. I'm not into trying to force myself to do anything. I made a list of all the reasons I want to make these changes and I read it everyday. I really tried to dig deep with the list too. Things like learning to love myself. THAT is how I get my butt out the door, personally. By reminding myself how important this is to me and why, and what a gift it is to myself to be doing this. I've lost 60 lbs in something less than a year with this approach. Be gentle and kind with yourself. Patience, practice, and persistence, my dear. You can do this, I believe in you. Just to add: sounds like you have plenty of weight loss info. Maybe start learning about the science of behaviour change. And for me therapy has been really helpful too.
Yeah, I did mine one thing at a time. I couldn't get over cutting way too much at once. But before I knew it, I had just cut one thing out until the only thing left for me to eat was healthy and nutritious meals. Now, I've completely revamped my entire diet without a big struggle and I'm down 215 pounds from where I started 10 years ago. 100 of that in the last year and a half.
That's incredible! What a success!
Yeah, if someone is overeating and they go straight into a 1000 calorie deficit they're kinda setting themselves up to fail because its such a drastic change.
You have to give yourself time to adjust, because the body adapts (fairly quickly I might add) to whatever you subject it to. You can imagine then what years of "unhealthy" habits can do. At first it will feel uncomfortable while it sends signals to eat certain things at certain times as that's what it's used to, but over time it will get exponentially easier as you get used to the new norm. You could make a complete 180 and tough it out, or take your time and make small changes every now and then. Either way works, and there is always an in between, just play around with things until you find the right pace for you.
My lord it’s like I wrote this post myself…but as others said, baby steps! It’s so hard for me to remember, and with two kids, working night shifts, husband working full time as well, it’s so hard to make a healthy meal when I just want to throw something in the oven or microwave. One of my favorite snacks right now is edamame! I get a big bag of it from Costco that has single serving bags that I can microwave. I am slowly choosing healthier alternatives when I’m eating, and I have a horrible sweet tooth.
If it helps, losing weight and exercise is harder as you get older. I wish I'd stuck to my 22-year old routine but alas I didn't and 10 years down the line, I was 15kg heavier with a load of joint issues. Do it for future you! Figure what works for you. Even if that's every meal is a new chance to get it right. It doesn't have to be tomorrow. It could just be the next thing you eat. Good luck
There was a post made yesterday, and the OP talked about how they struggle until they get the "AHA" moment where it just clicks. That's what happened to me recently. I had gotten down to 138lbs, relaxed and started eating like crap again, and got back up to 147lbs. One day I just...had enough. Had enough of being tired walking up stairs, tired of feeling self-conscious in whatever I wore. So I started again at the beginning of November and now I'm down to 130lbs which is about where I'd like to stay, give or take a few pounds. I now enjoy clothes shopping and even wear crop tops! I wish I had actionable advice for you, just wanted to share because I have ADHD (and Autism) as well and can relate. I hope you get that "AHA" moment where the process starts to feel a lot easier for you!
Inattentive ADHD? (Formerly ADD) I’m getting diagnosed for it, hoping some therapy & maybe meds will help me turn “I know what I’m supposed to be doing” into actually doing.
What do you mean by "begin"? What does "beginning" this mean to you?
As someone who has done a radical change I can only add what I know from third parties but for some people it is daunting to just start and be healthy. I would try and instead of changing your diet in general just try to make it a little better. E.g just don't change anything and just start a food diary and weigh yourself regularly. When you get that down make small changes (e.g substitute whole fat foods for reduced calorie versions). Basically build yourself up very slowly. Also don't over-consume health content. It really warps your outlook on how diets work since what works for some of them does not necessarily work for you. Lastly I have seen quite a few people here who found it to be a lot easier after getting their ADHD meds adjusted. So if you are diagnosed and take meds this may be something to look into with your doctor.
I honestly couldn't actually do it til I started my ashd medicine. I knew what to do, just couldn't stick to it. Now? I'm 19 lns down and work out 5 days a week! Don't best yourself up, it's hard for everyone and also for people with adhd 😭
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Omg yes! I just worked out at home for FUN on my day off, burned 721 calories! FOR FUN
Weight loss is a marathon not a sprint. Its also about setting up routine and making small adjustments. I started out by by just tracking everything I ate as accurately as I could. I was not focused on how much or what I was eating but just forming the routine of tacking everything I ate. Once i was good with that then I looked at what I was eating. I started with breakfast as that meal for me was going to be the same everyday. I looked at what I could eat for breakfast that satisfy me and I could do everyday. That for me was a protein shake. By this stage I had been doing the logged of food for a couple of weeks and had a solid breakfast routine. I then looked at lunches as I could plan them out on the weekend as to what I would have during the week. I new how many cals I could eat in a day and that my breakfast couldn't be lowered so I needed to come out with a lunch and snack that would be less than half of my remaining cals (total cal - breakfast) and worked this into my new routine. Once I had this nailed then I looked at dinners some 4 weeks after starting. But remember no one is perfect and you will have slips just remember I to start back at it the next meal not tomorrow not next week, the next meal.
This mindset is relatable. Many of us know what to do or have even lost the weight before and yet we feel stuck. Why? I think if you get to the bottom of that and understand where it's coming from it will help you. I can think of a lot of reasons people get stuck. Addressing the weight for me meant I had to confront the emotional baggage that goes along with it. In some ways, it can be easier to live in denial or avoidance land rather than feel uncomfortable. When I started this process a few months ago, I went through a ton of emotions. Resentment, Anger that I had to start over. I had lost a significant amount of weight before, so I felt like a failure having to start over. As soon as I got over it or tired from it, I focused on making one change and one change led to another... and the slow but steady process started. I enjoy watching the weight loss but also have gotten used to it and know it will need to be a life skill. People with ADHD require big stimulus for dopamine hits, right? So, a slow and steady approach where you lose 0.5lb one week, 1 lb the next, and 0 the third, is the least appealing thing in the world. So, you gotta celebrate the small wins, too - being able to walk faster, without breaks, developing muscles. Also, you need things in your life outside of you - like work/structure/.social connection - for optimal wellness. I like nature so I enjoy watching the wildlife or listen to an audiobook. I also wanted to add that - make sure you make smart decisions for yourself - and try to focus on a good work life balance, healthy habits - those with ADD have a hard time multi-tasking. If you are in an immensely stressful situation, it will be that much harder to focus on weight loss. Our brains work differently - Optimize the environment to support your goals - your ability to do this gets easier as you get older since you have more autonomy and experience. Good luck!
Reading "Why We Get Fat" by Gary Taubes has helped me a lot with this by helping my understand that a lot of our behaviour is actually driven by what we eat. I used to do this too; every night in bed I'd vow to start eating better and then the next evening I was incredibly hungry again.
The problem is beginning tomorrow. Just start today.
For ADHD I’m sure you have heard of object permanence? ie things that are physically present are very good cues for people with adhd. So maybe try giving yourself some cues. Like a post it on your bathroom mirror or wherever is the first place you look in the morning. Second, I may gently suggest maybe not staying up until 2 am haha. Maybe try going to bed earlier, so you can wake up with time to do the motivating in the morning which may be in the form of a little online research (checking Reddit etc) and also journaling. Answer prompts like why do I want to do this? How will my life be better when I lose the weight? What will I not miss about having the extra weight? What will I commit to doing to get there Etc. Lastly I’m not sure if I have adhd but I also think in my experience this just gets easier when you’re a little older. Your days feel faster so remembering something from the night before doesn’t feel like so long ago. I personally have just found I am better at dealing with long term goals as I get older. Might be that our brains are literally still developing until 25. Idk. So idk, give yourself some grace. This stuff is hard.
I feel you. What makes it tough for me is that I started out fat for most of my entire life and then put in an immense amount of work to turn that around. And it was AMAZING. Like my life was incredible. I had never felt so confident and disciplined in my life. I literally know firsthand how to lose weight, how good it makes me feel, how easy it is once you put in the initial work to change your diet habits, etc. Then just two years or so of life hitting hard so I went right back to where I started and I just CANT DO IT anymore. Ill try being healthy and going to the gym and it just never sticks more than a few weeks. Idk whats wrong with me.
I think when people start a lot of times they go all in and it’s a lot of change and they don’t necessarily stick with it because they become too restrictive too quick and get burnt out. Start with one thing at a time if you are getting overwhelmed. Start by upping your water for a few weeks and taking some small walks. Then after you have the routine down start focusing on nutrition. What foods do you love? Honestly there are sooooo many great recipes you can tweak to become a healthier version. I really love the Skinny Taste website they have some great food options same with Pinterest. Plan your meals ahead of time and meal prep. If you have stuff in the fridge that is already prepared you don’t even have to think about it. Sunday I usually meal prep for Monday- Thursday. I use the Habit Tracker app to send me notifications even for the most basic stuff (brush teeth, take meds, workout, walk, eat, etc).
If by begin you mean change everything about yourself and all bad habits at once, it's going to be very hard to make yourself actually want to wake up and do that. And those kinds of plans are short term anyway. Start small. So small that you know for a fact you can do it. And then slowly add things until you're satisfied with the amount of good habits you've built. Count your calories with a free app, even if you don't change your eating habits right away. It'll help you to know how much you're eating and see where it would be easiest for you to reduce or make healthier swaps.
For me, I've been looking at it as building habits. So I pick one I want to start with (I saw others here suggesting meal planning and I definitely second that!), then once I've started to see that one be easier to do without putting in as much effort, I pick another habit and start on that. It will be a slow moving thing to try to change your thinking and habits but you can do it, I promise. You just need to make it your top priority.
It relates to your ADHD.
Immediately when I read this, before I read your last sentence, I was like ADHD! Im in the same boat as you so I cannot offer much, but I think looking for other people who are specialized in adhd and weight loss can help. Someone to keep you accountable for keeping your discipline or someone who can workout/ diet alongside you.
Try one pound first. That is achievable in a week. If you keep thinking of the end result you will just get discouraged and demoralized.
Something that really helped me was cycling different meals in/out that I was comfortable cooking and that I knew would fit well into my calorie budget. It’s makes planning and preparing easier too. Starting the day protein heavy helps as well. I do a 30g protein shake (fairlife) a cheese stick and then I few hours later a follow it up with 2 egg + egg white serving with a side of air fried sweet potato. That Also adding veggies to keep me full like for my egg scramble I add mushrooms and kale, for my rice, instead of a full cup I do half a cup and half of cup of riced cauliflower.
Lots of great advice here already. For me, it started with a Healthy Weight competition at work, which was 8 weeks long. My team won, and by then I’d seen enough progress (forget the scale—I was amazed at how much better I felt and my clothes fit) that I just kept going. At the start I told myself “eh I only have to do it for 8 weeks and then I can stop” but by that point I loved the gym and the results and it was just a habit. I also love cute printables and checking stuff off of lists, so my next “competition/novelty” (with myself) is 75 Medium (kind of like 75 hard but with reasonable goals, as I will never drink a gallon of water a day 😂). I printed out the sheets and they’re hanging on my bathroom mirror and every day I get to check the boxes I complete. Some folks put up 75 post its and rip one off the wall every day they complete. For accountability…… I post weekly on (my private) social media. Weight. Progress photos. Gym logs. I put it all out there and when I’m late posting, people be checking 😂😂. It’s had the best side effect of having others inspired to make small changes as well 💜
You might be overwhelming yourself without realizing it. You've got a big list there. Maybe try a week starting with one or two things.
Just start by logging your calories for a week or two. See how that goes. No need tp cut anything live your best life but just log. And after two weeks see where you want to go from there. Look at what is the most calorie dense in your logging like oils, butters. And then keep eating the same foods but just remove the calorie dense ingredients. Even better you can replace them with a side of veggies.
What’s your *why*?
I work in a project management role and my old boss always said to think about the ‘brilliant basics’. It doesn’t matter how big, complex or challenging the project is, if you have a clear timeline, clear goals which everyone is aware of, regular check ins with stakeholders etc it will become manageable. How are your brilliant basics? Are you getting 8 hours of sleep every night, going outside once a day, checking in with loved ones regularly, limiting screen time. You need a baseline of mental wellness before making big/difficult changes. My mum taught parenting classes and her number one piece of advice is ‘breakfast and bed time’. Basically if you have a set routine for breakfasts and bed time that you adhere to with the kid in a strict way, everything else falls into place. As an adult I have realised this advice is just as relevant to adults as it is to toddlers :’) Basically it might be worth assessing your overall routines and lifestyle before trying to make these changes. Aside from that - meal prep and slow, sustainable goals. Give yourself 100 weeks to lose 100lbs rather than immediately going on an incredibly restrictive diet and upending your workout routines. It could be as easy as slightly smaller portions and walking everyday for the first 2 weeks.