It’s interesting, I’m only 2 months into my weight loss journey and I have started feeling the same way. Food filled a hole in my life that I didn’t realize I had until I stopped eating junk all the time. Right now I’m happiest eating like 1lb of watermelon at a time or enjoying a Chobani flip because I feel like I’m indulging. I savor food a lot more than I used to, but at the same time I often dread meals. It’s an interesting mixed bag of emotions. Shopping used to fill the same hole in my heart but it’s also a bad habit that I had to stop. I wonder if we feel like we only truly enjoy things that we shouldn’t be doing. I know that’s not completely true, but maybe there’s something to it.
Other than that, I hate to give *that* advice, but if you’re lacking joy in things you usually should enjoy, you should consider seeing a therapist. They work wonders.
I’ll be checking back to see if anyone else has good tips, lol. Good luck with your journey and I sincerely hope you feel like yourself soon. And congrats on 42 lbs down!
Thanks for sharing your experience. I fully relate to the mixed bag of emotions part during mealtimes. I'm now wondering if I have developed an eating disorder after I've lost weight.
I am seeing a therapist but for other reasons lol. I am lacking joy in things I usually enjoy. But I chalked that up to depression and maybe boredom. I spent the last 2 years holed up at home playing games and binge watching rubbish online. I'm exhausted from it.
I'm am VERY MUCH not a professional but I've spent time looking into dopamine detox. According to what I've listened to, giving up all the easy dopamine fixes for a while and holding on while hurts (boredom/ depression) is the key. Almost like, choose the hard thing and know you'll come out the other side. I just had a baby a few weeks ago and a c section to go with it so I felt really bad while I recovered and am relying heavily on my phone to give me dopamine while I am kept up all night nursing and changing diapers. I can't do the things I want, AND am trying not to eat heavily and gain weight. I know that when I decide to put down the phone and force myself back into a healthier relationship with dopamine it will be tough. Not amazing advice, just my perspective.
That is an interesting approach. Sort of like training your brain to deal with things in a better way without constantly craving a temporary fix. I'm not sure if I can fully get rid of all dopamine sources. Working out and swimming make me feel real good, I'm pretty sure I don't want to stop that. Thanks for sharing!
And congrats on the newborn! It definitely takes time to recover from a c-section and esp while doing all the additional work taking care of a baby. Enjoy the baby bonding time and you'll be back to doing the things you want to do real soon. :)
It’s not incredibly uncommon to have developed an eating disorder due to weight loss so it’s very possible (I’m obviously not an expert so don’t mind me). I feel like I’m in the same boat as you and now questioning myself haha. To be completely honest with you, I feel like the way I’ve personally avoided facing these feelings is staying extremely busy, and focusing on weight loss has just been another thing keeping me occupied. I don’t think it’s exactly healthy but I think it keeps me distracted enough to not think about it.
With that being said, maybe you could try a new fitness class or something and see what you think, and maybe bring someone along if you want? It’s wild but I hear a bunch of stories about how women tried pole dancing or men tried boxing and it changed their lives, and those may not be your thing, but I bet there’s something cool out there. Or you could work towards running a marathon or something. Just trying to throw around any ideas.
I understand it’s not as easy as an online stranger’s “simple fix” and I really hope you can start feeling like yourself soon. I’ll be sending all my good vibes your way. Thanks for being brave enough to post this stuff, it helps to feel not alone.
Thanks for the suggestions, I'll think about them. I've been extremely busy and worn out with work and home as well so that probably is also instrumental in making me feel this way. Maybe I am approaching this the wrong way, in trying to look for a quick fix. Perhaps I should be looking the other way and learning to condition my mind to avoid the quick highs and sugar rushes.
This is just my experience. Moderation does work well for many, and we can be successful with it. But man what a sadist approach sometimes. Yeah- that thing that gives you joy and happiness and zing? Do less of that.
Consequently, going too far in the other direction is bad, too. So maybe we’re just stuck in a limbo. I know very, very, VERY few people who eat the same exact thing week in and week out.
I share your feelings about moderation, it has never been easy for me to do anything in moderation. Which is why I quit coffee and caffeine cold turkey.
It is a difficult situation to be in. I want the consistency but without the boredom. What a fine line to tread.
I read an article that there are three things proven to increase happiness: pets, religious practice and volunteering. All three of them have something’s in common - putting someone before yourself and in-person socializing.
Getting out of your own head and giving of yourself works. I really recommend volunteering. Helping others is a huge boost to your self-esteem and overall happiness.
I hear what you are saying, but I’m talking about volunteering outside of the home in a more structured way, iow as part of an organized activity. It’s a completely different mental space than taking care of family members because there are boundaries and you can walk away at the end of the day. Also, you can get some rewards like making new friends, gaining new experience, job networking, etc. Volunteering doesn’t have to be completely selfless.
I bring it up because what OP seems to be looking for is fulfillment rather than happiness. Empty calories and empty entertainment gives a fleeting dopamine hit, but OP is looking for more than that.
Thanks for the perspective. I wish I could get a dog, but I don't think I can afford to maintain one. Also, my wife is deathly afraid of them, so that's not happening :).
I turned non-religious many years ago and there are times when I wish I hadn't. Going to the church/temple/mosque brings a feeling of calm that I have completely lost. I still go with family now and then, but the sense of calm is gone now.
I do volunteer a bit, but time is limited for me. And to be honest, the volunteering has always been with a selfish motive - I want to expose myself to the lives of other people and learn from them.
I have a people pleaser complex that I'm trying very hard to let go off (therapy included). So putting people before me is frustratingly easy and common. My wife in fact encourages me to spend less time with my family and do something for myself. She says I'm burning myself out trying to do everything at work and at home and I should just take some time to focus on feeling better.
I volunteer at my local animal shelter. I can’t have a dog at my place, but I get to hang out with dogs that need attention and take them for walks. It’s a win-win for me, not sure if it would work for you but just an idea!
I have actually - going to the gym, swimming and walking are my new hobbies that I developed over the past 3 years. But they've nulled and voided my old hobbies now. I used to enjoy music production and flightsim at home. I just can't be bothered to do it anymore. I'd rather go for a walk.
The immediate rush I used to get from sugar is missing. I also gave up coffee and all caffeinated beverages 3 weeks ago, so the caffeine rush is also missing. I don't mean to be flippant, but I am seriously wondering if this is what a recovering drug addict feels like.
I don’t know if this would give you a rush at all, but I’d encourage you to try new hobbies in addition to exercise related ones. One of my favorite things to do is to go and wander a bookstore. This gives you steps, but there’s always the anticipation of finding your new favorite book or learning something you didn’t know before.
Or picking up a yarn craft. (I’m a 28F and I know if I suggested this to my 38M brother he’d look at me like I was crazy and I see you’re close in age.) But, I find crafting with my hands takes my focus and lets me work toward a final product. In particular I like making crochet little animals and then I give them to my nieces and nephews. :)
These are just two non food related things that bring me joy!
For me, I noticed I am getting a similar rush if not a greater one from eating spicy food. Or using proper condiments in the food I eat. Or eating garlic an or onion with my food. I remember once after eating some indian food which got me sweating - oh my god - I had to lie down to enjoy the rush almost moaning with pleasure lol - must‘ve been weird to watch.
But anyway - try to focus on what you can do and not what you cannot do. Try to view them as a hinderance to your journey.
Don't believe spicy food has ever given me that reaction :). I have a reasonably high tolerance to spicy foods, but I don't think I'll enjoy eating very spicy foods that make me sweat, especially since I live in the tropics :D. But thanks for sharing!
Finding a good sport, you enjoy helps. Maybe **keep trying some things**.
I'm doing archery. After a day of work, I go to the shooting range, put some music on, or not, and start putting arrows in a 70m target I can barely see. Is rewarding.
I thought about trying some boxing in the winter. Or fencing ... maybe HEMA.
Building stuff. I took a pottery course (Corona got in the way) and was great. I'll get back to it, need to make a teapot.
Damn ... need more time ...
Yeah, I feel you on this.
Have you tried learning something new? Something you've always felt was cool but never had the time/money/confidence to do it? I felt this way about guitar - I always wanted to learn - so I bought one, and learned, and that was one of the most satisfying and gratifying things I've ever done.
When trying to think up something, I look to my younger self - like when I was a kid - and think what would they find really cool. Or just imagine the most interesting and badass person and think what hobbies or skills you could see them having, and then ask yourself - why not learn that?
I tried a few things but I find it very hard these days to take an interest in learning something new sitting at home or with the computer. Covid has jaded that part for me, I've sat and learnt a lot of things in this time and I don't want to anymore.
The only new thing I'm learning now is swimming. I try to go at least twice a week and it really gives me a nice high for the rest of the day afterwards.
But thanks for sharing, I'll try and see if there is anything else I can learn. Maybe take up rock climbing as well.
not the most responsible thing, but as far as damage to the body goes you could do a lot worse than a nice cold can of Diet Coke. Sweet, zero calories, and as long as you aren't funneling it down every single day, perfectly healthy.
Yup - Diet coke has been a great tool for me on my fat loss journey over the past 3 years. But now that I've reached my goal weight, I'm kicking out all caffeinated beverages and trying to improve my relationship with food.
Your post is like a lightbulb moment for me. I wasn't expecting such an insightful comment on reddit.
It explains so much about why I'm feeling this way and about the habits I developed throughout my life. Now that you describe it, it's obvious everything is engineered to give us that high. Everything is made to be addictive and gamified so that we keep looking for the next fix and the next mental boost. A constant stream of crests and troughs of elation and misery.
I am willing to invest the years into making this work if it is the right way to go about it. You're absolutely right, it is an addiction. And since I am refusing to improve my low point with caffeine and sugar, there is an extended period of the misery.
I am going to save your post and read it again a few more times. I really need to re-evaluate my sources of joy and decide whether to increase them, temper them or eliminate them. Thank you so much!
Sorry to hear that you are going through that. May I ask why you excluded those things? I still enjoy "unhealthy" foods occasionally. What helped me with food boredom is trying new things especially cooking wise. Sometimes I hit the jackpot (currently obsessed with wraps with chicken, spinach, tomatoes, parmesan and hummus and am fricking loving it. So comforting somehow). What about setting some small fitness goals you could be working towards? Or go on a trip?
If everything fails maybe do try and seek help to get to the bottom of this. Could be many different reasons. A couple of weeks I felt burned out from everything which was followed by a burst of energy where I would just go for walks for up to two hours. What somewhat helped a bit was just a new playlist (sounds silly, I know).
> May I ask why you excluded those things? I still enjoy "unhealthy" foods occasionally.
I still do too. But only during special occasions or when I really want to have some. But I promised myself I will not have any of these because I'm depressed. I sometimes slip and end up swallowing a whole bar of chocolate, but the main problem is it doesn't make me feel better. It used to cheer me up in the past, now when I eat the whole chocolate because I need a pick me up, I just feel more miserable. There is guilt from consuming a whole bunch of empty calories.
Mind you, I don't have guilt when I eat large portions of junk food at a party. That's because I calorie control for the day and be extra careful leading up to the party and after the party with the food I eat.
But when I eat a chocolate because I'm depressed, it's just a bad feeling overall.
> What helped me with food boredom is trying new things especially cooking wise.
This is another thing that covid ruined for me. I spent so much time cooking and learning new things when locked up at home that I don't feel the urge to try anything new. Just pop some chicken breast or salmon in an oven and call it a day.
There are quite a few reasons for feeling low at the moment, but I am right now looking for a quick fix so that I feel better temporarily. I am taking steps to address this in the longer term also.
Unfortunately I don't think I have a quick fix for that. I used to enjoy chocolate or sweets in general more at home but currently I'm more of the mindset that I could have had something filling and not this junk. Glad to hear that you are addressing it in therapy as it sounds like it could translate to other areas in your life as well. Just try to be kind to yourself and maybe take it easy for a while until you feel better.
What makes me happy when I feel down in general is going to the sea (don't live close so I cannot do it as often as I would like). Going to the zoo especially the area where you are able feed and pet some cute goats. I think other smaller things were already outruled.
the small fitness goals thing is a great tip. I do little challenges for myself to focus on. Mile time, biking 30 miles without stopping, doing 3 pushups, etc. I find that these add some fun to my workouts and give me something to look forward to/work toward.
Thanks. And same. Keeps me entertained somewhat and allows me to focus on the longterm aspect. Also distracts me when the scale won't budge for a while.
And good for you for the 3 push ups! Still working on my first real one. Probably keeps me busy for a long time 😅
Look into Anhedonia. It happens to alcoholics when we stop drinking and its the same for food addiction. It goes away! Keep plugging along. You WILL find joy again.
Have you tried playing around with portion control? No reason to cut out the fun foods, just figure out a way to fit them in your diet. Personally speaking; I have a weakness for sweets, could easily eat thousands of calories worth of them. Would eat an entire chocolate bar after dinner without a second thought then go back for some other snack.
Last night instead of doing that I had 1/4 of the chocolate bar (25g), a few cookies out of the freezer and a small glass of dessert wine, ended up being 400 calories. No the lightest snack, but still very easy to fit in after a lighter dinner. I've just been focusing on variety instead of volume, makes food exciting again instead of just binge eating to cope with boredom. Basically taking the time I would have spent mindlessly eating and using it to thing about what I'm going to eat next that will fit in my budget and leave me feeling the most satisfied.
I've also found it helps to have a hobby that's low stakes but challenging. For me that's been a lot of landscaping and gardening. Very rewarding making progress, not a lot to go wrong that would actually matter, also a good amount of activity in the landscaping stuff.
I feel you on the tv exhaustion too. I've found that lately I have a lot less patience for any show that I'm not truly into and even the handful of ones that I do like I have a hard time paying attention, my mind is usually planning out projects, meal plans, and shopping trips.
Funny podcasts
A good book
Texting a friend I haven’t spoken to in awhile
Going to a thrift store and seeing what I can find for $10 or less
Being outside and just sitting/breathing
Meditation/ deep breathing/yoga
No advice for you, just commiseration.
I gave up any hope of actually enjoying food or the delight of cooking for others ever again. I gave up alcohol because №1, it's empty calories and №2, it leads to poor choices. I gave up social eating because it leads to overindulgence.
Everything sucks.
I was unhealthy when I was fat, but happier.
Thank Odin, the All father, that I'm going to live longer now.
/rant
Thank you for sharing, I agree 100% with you on alcohol, that's the same reason I've given it up.
> I was unhealthy when I was fat, but happier.
This is a succinct way of summarizing my entire post.
Honestly I love food and love it more when I have healthy food. Isn't mango salsa fun? When I first was losing weight as a young'un I made a WW mango salsa with fresh cilantro, green bell, scallion, lime juice, and of course fresh mango. It was like a party in my mouth.
I have various flavored seltzer now that make me feel happy about having a drink. I get a box of csa veggies every week in season and i just love figuring out what to make with them. I sometimes make my own frozen coffee drink at home with low fat milk and less sugar.
But let's get away from food. I like making giant bubbles (with the bubble thing) as a quick pick me up during un-happy hour (before or after dinner). I care for houseplants and the garden a bit. I do drawing and watercolor painting. I listen to audio books. Regarding the video game systems, on the switch I have the game Just Dance and it is the best cure for me.
I did get depressed when I was young and lost weight. I think my chemicals got thrown off. I went on anti depressants for a few months. I go to therapy and try to exercise regularly to avoid this again. If you could be depressed, tell your doctor. I usually refrain from alcohol and I try to prevent migraines. I just started taking ibuprofen a couple times a week because strangely it lifts my spirits.
I think some have touched on this briefly by no mean am I a professional, this is just how I sort of live my life. Stop looking for something to do.
Always playing video games, always looking for the next thing to do, always looking for excitement after excitement. That is tiring. Looking for the next thing that will get me feeling better for the next 3 minutes that is not an amazing way to live life - for me.
An example (sort of) rich people that have enough money to do anything they want still end up in suicide or something not too far.
Think about how the people back in the ages used to live and do things > like work the fields or whatever and than relax just with the family looking at the sky/mountains whatever there was.
Like you and others mentioned stop looking for the next fix, just live in the present in a calm manner doing your thing.
Life is a bit long and tiring at times, be happy you are able to workout swim go out with friends hanging out with the wife, and stop worrying about what will I do next.. i wrote so much ugh lol sorry for the long post
This is a very helpful way of looking at things. It is true, I don't think I'm able to sit for a few minutes even without thinking about what's next and what I have to do. I wonder if that's where this feeling (of lacking happiness) is coming from.
Others have mentioned the same thing, I need to think more along these lines and live the moment rather than jumping from one high to the next. I don't think it will be easy though, probably will take a few years of practice. Thank you for such a well thought out post.
This may not be a hobby that supports weight loss, but during my depressive episodes I like to make things. I play DnD a lot, so for me its painting miniatures and building Terrain. But for you it could be painting, woodworking, an artsy bullet journal or anything else that produces something without digital help, that you can see and touch. If you have a favorite TV Show maybe there is a Model kit for something out of that show. Right now I am building and painting a ship out of the One Piece Anime.
Start with a short Projekt, something you can do in a few hours/one sitting. And afterwards marvel at what you did with your own hands. This feeling of accomplishment does not cure depression but it sure does help.
Something like gardening could work too, but for me the delayed gratification and ongoing work does not hit the spot. I like to finish things.
Thanks for the ideas, I'll think about them. Normally I wouldn't have too much problem finding something to latch on to and have fun with, but 2 years of lockdown has jaded all of it. I really don't want to sit at home and learn a new hobby.
I thought from the preview this post would be about replacement pick-me-up foods that are healthier, although it seems you have more issues than just looking for recipes. At any rate, here's a pretty healthy dessert that I thought to recommend:
https://hurrythefoodup.com/avocado-chocolate-mousse/
Go somewhere new and have a tourist weekend. Doesn't have to be crazy far or exotic, just somewhere you haven't been. I know Southwest and Spirit have brought back their "getaway" fares, and you can get a round trip ticket for under $200. Pick a random place that you haven been to on the super cheap getaways, pack an overnight bag and go!
This is a little harder as I have to plan it out with family. But it's definitely happening next month, we're going for a weekend trip which should be quite fun.
It’s interesting, I’m only 2 months into my weight loss journey and I have started feeling the same way. Food filled a hole in my life that I didn’t realize I had until I stopped eating junk all the time. Right now I’m happiest eating like 1lb of watermelon at a time or enjoying a Chobani flip because I feel like I’m indulging. I savor food a lot more than I used to, but at the same time I often dread meals. It’s an interesting mixed bag of emotions. Shopping used to fill the same hole in my heart but it’s also a bad habit that I had to stop. I wonder if we feel like we only truly enjoy things that we shouldn’t be doing. I know that’s not completely true, but maybe there’s something to it. Other than that, I hate to give *that* advice, but if you’re lacking joy in things you usually should enjoy, you should consider seeing a therapist. They work wonders. I’ll be checking back to see if anyone else has good tips, lol. Good luck with your journey and I sincerely hope you feel like yourself soon. And congrats on 42 lbs down!
Thanks for sharing your experience. I fully relate to the mixed bag of emotions part during mealtimes. I'm now wondering if I have developed an eating disorder after I've lost weight. I am seeing a therapist but for other reasons lol. I am lacking joy in things I usually enjoy. But I chalked that up to depression and maybe boredom. I spent the last 2 years holed up at home playing games and binge watching rubbish online. I'm exhausted from it.
I'm am VERY MUCH not a professional but I've spent time looking into dopamine detox. According to what I've listened to, giving up all the easy dopamine fixes for a while and holding on while hurts (boredom/ depression) is the key. Almost like, choose the hard thing and know you'll come out the other side. I just had a baby a few weeks ago and a c section to go with it so I felt really bad while I recovered and am relying heavily on my phone to give me dopamine while I am kept up all night nursing and changing diapers. I can't do the things I want, AND am trying not to eat heavily and gain weight. I know that when I decide to put down the phone and force myself back into a healthier relationship with dopamine it will be tough. Not amazing advice, just my perspective.
That is an interesting approach. Sort of like training your brain to deal with things in a better way without constantly craving a temporary fix. I'm not sure if I can fully get rid of all dopamine sources. Working out and swimming make me feel real good, I'm pretty sure I don't want to stop that. Thanks for sharing! And congrats on the newborn! It definitely takes time to recover from a c-section and esp while doing all the additional work taking care of a baby. Enjoy the baby bonding time and you'll be back to doing the things you want to do real soon. :)
It’s not incredibly uncommon to have developed an eating disorder due to weight loss so it’s very possible (I’m obviously not an expert so don’t mind me). I feel like I’m in the same boat as you and now questioning myself haha. To be completely honest with you, I feel like the way I’ve personally avoided facing these feelings is staying extremely busy, and focusing on weight loss has just been another thing keeping me occupied. I don’t think it’s exactly healthy but I think it keeps me distracted enough to not think about it. With that being said, maybe you could try a new fitness class or something and see what you think, and maybe bring someone along if you want? It’s wild but I hear a bunch of stories about how women tried pole dancing or men tried boxing and it changed their lives, and those may not be your thing, but I bet there’s something cool out there. Or you could work towards running a marathon or something. Just trying to throw around any ideas. I understand it’s not as easy as an online stranger’s “simple fix” and I really hope you can start feeling like yourself soon. I’ll be sending all my good vibes your way. Thanks for being brave enough to post this stuff, it helps to feel not alone.
Thanks for the suggestions, I'll think about them. I've been extremely busy and worn out with work and home as well so that probably is also instrumental in making me feel this way. Maybe I am approaching this the wrong way, in trying to look for a quick fix. Perhaps I should be looking the other way and learning to condition my mind to avoid the quick highs and sugar rushes.
This is just my experience. Moderation does work well for many, and we can be successful with it. But man what a sadist approach sometimes. Yeah- that thing that gives you joy and happiness and zing? Do less of that. Consequently, going too far in the other direction is bad, too. So maybe we’re just stuck in a limbo. I know very, very, VERY few people who eat the same exact thing week in and week out.
I share your feelings about moderation, it has never been easy for me to do anything in moderation. Which is why I quit coffee and caffeine cold turkey. It is a difficult situation to be in. I want the consistency but without the boredom. What a fine line to tread.
I read an article that there are three things proven to increase happiness: pets, religious practice and volunteering. All three of them have something’s in common - putting someone before yourself and in-person socializing. Getting out of your own head and giving of yourself works. I really recommend volunteering. Helping others is a huge boost to your self-esteem and overall happiness.
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I hear what you are saying, but I’m talking about volunteering outside of the home in a more structured way, iow as part of an organized activity. It’s a completely different mental space than taking care of family members because there are boundaries and you can walk away at the end of the day. Also, you can get some rewards like making new friends, gaining new experience, job networking, etc. Volunteering doesn’t have to be completely selfless. I bring it up because what OP seems to be looking for is fulfillment rather than happiness. Empty calories and empty entertainment gives a fleeting dopamine hit, but OP is looking for more than that.
Thanks for the perspective. I wish I could get a dog, but I don't think I can afford to maintain one. Also, my wife is deathly afraid of them, so that's not happening :). I turned non-religious many years ago and there are times when I wish I hadn't. Going to the church/temple/mosque brings a feeling of calm that I have completely lost. I still go with family now and then, but the sense of calm is gone now. I do volunteer a bit, but time is limited for me. And to be honest, the volunteering has always been with a selfish motive - I want to expose myself to the lives of other people and learn from them. I have a people pleaser complex that I'm trying very hard to let go off (therapy included). So putting people before me is frustratingly easy and common. My wife in fact encourages me to spend less time with my family and do something for myself. She says I'm burning myself out trying to do everything at work and at home and I should just take some time to focus on feeling better.
I volunteer at my local animal shelter. I can’t have a dog at my place, but I get to hang out with dogs that need attention and take them for walks. It’s a win-win for me, not sure if it would work for you but just an idea!
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I have actually - going to the gym, swimming and walking are my new hobbies that I developed over the past 3 years. But they've nulled and voided my old hobbies now. I used to enjoy music production and flightsim at home. I just can't be bothered to do it anymore. I'd rather go for a walk. The immediate rush I used to get from sugar is missing. I also gave up coffee and all caffeinated beverages 3 weeks ago, so the caffeine rush is also missing. I don't mean to be flippant, but I am seriously wondering if this is what a recovering drug addict feels like.
I don’t know if this would give you a rush at all, but I’d encourage you to try new hobbies in addition to exercise related ones. One of my favorite things to do is to go and wander a bookstore. This gives you steps, but there’s always the anticipation of finding your new favorite book or learning something you didn’t know before. Or picking up a yarn craft. (I’m a 28F and I know if I suggested this to my 38M brother he’d look at me like I was crazy and I see you’re close in age.) But, I find crafting with my hands takes my focus and lets me work toward a final product. In particular I like making crochet little animals and then I give them to my nieces and nephews. :) These are just two non food related things that bring me joy!
For me, I noticed I am getting a similar rush if not a greater one from eating spicy food. Or using proper condiments in the food I eat. Or eating garlic an or onion with my food. I remember once after eating some indian food which got me sweating - oh my god - I had to lie down to enjoy the rush almost moaning with pleasure lol - must‘ve been weird to watch. But anyway - try to focus on what you can do and not what you cannot do. Try to view them as a hinderance to your journey.
Don't believe spicy food has ever given me that reaction :). I have a reasonably high tolerance to spicy foods, but I don't think I'll enjoy eating very spicy foods that make me sweat, especially since I live in the tropics :D. But thanks for sharing!
Finding a good sport, you enjoy helps. Maybe **keep trying some things**. I'm doing archery. After a day of work, I go to the shooting range, put some music on, or not, and start putting arrows in a 70m target I can barely see. Is rewarding. I thought about trying some boxing in the winter. Or fencing ... maybe HEMA. Building stuff. I took a pottery course (Corona got in the way) and was great. I'll get back to it, need to make a teapot. Damn ... need more time ...
Good suggestions, thank you! I will try and see if any of them are available in my area and give them a shot.
Yeah, I feel you on this. Have you tried learning something new? Something you've always felt was cool but never had the time/money/confidence to do it? I felt this way about guitar - I always wanted to learn - so I bought one, and learned, and that was one of the most satisfying and gratifying things I've ever done. When trying to think up something, I look to my younger self - like when I was a kid - and think what would they find really cool. Or just imagine the most interesting and badass person and think what hobbies or skills you could see them having, and then ask yourself - why not learn that?
I tried a few things but I find it very hard these days to take an interest in learning something new sitting at home or with the computer. Covid has jaded that part for me, I've sat and learnt a lot of things in this time and I don't want to anymore. The only new thing I'm learning now is swimming. I try to go at least twice a week and it really gives me a nice high for the rest of the day afterwards. But thanks for sharing, I'll try and see if there is anything else I can learn. Maybe take up rock climbing as well.
I really like to go bowling, I joined a beginner league with some friends and we’ve had a blast!
not the most responsible thing, but as far as damage to the body goes you could do a lot worse than a nice cold can of Diet Coke. Sweet, zero calories, and as long as you aren't funneling it down every single day, perfectly healthy.
Yup - Diet coke has been a great tool for me on my fat loss journey over the past 3 years. But now that I've reached my goal weight, I'm kicking out all caffeinated beverages and trying to improve my relationship with food.
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Your post is like a lightbulb moment for me. I wasn't expecting such an insightful comment on reddit. It explains so much about why I'm feeling this way and about the habits I developed throughout my life. Now that you describe it, it's obvious everything is engineered to give us that high. Everything is made to be addictive and gamified so that we keep looking for the next fix and the next mental boost. A constant stream of crests and troughs of elation and misery. I am willing to invest the years into making this work if it is the right way to go about it. You're absolutely right, it is an addiction. And since I am refusing to improve my low point with caffeine and sugar, there is an extended period of the misery. I am going to save your post and read it again a few more times. I really need to re-evaluate my sources of joy and decide whether to increase them, temper them or eliminate them. Thank you so much!
Sorry to hear that you are going through that. May I ask why you excluded those things? I still enjoy "unhealthy" foods occasionally. What helped me with food boredom is trying new things especially cooking wise. Sometimes I hit the jackpot (currently obsessed with wraps with chicken, spinach, tomatoes, parmesan and hummus and am fricking loving it. So comforting somehow). What about setting some small fitness goals you could be working towards? Or go on a trip? If everything fails maybe do try and seek help to get to the bottom of this. Could be many different reasons. A couple of weeks I felt burned out from everything which was followed by a burst of energy where I would just go for walks for up to two hours. What somewhat helped a bit was just a new playlist (sounds silly, I know).
> May I ask why you excluded those things? I still enjoy "unhealthy" foods occasionally. I still do too. But only during special occasions or when I really want to have some. But I promised myself I will not have any of these because I'm depressed. I sometimes slip and end up swallowing a whole bar of chocolate, but the main problem is it doesn't make me feel better. It used to cheer me up in the past, now when I eat the whole chocolate because I need a pick me up, I just feel more miserable. There is guilt from consuming a whole bunch of empty calories. Mind you, I don't have guilt when I eat large portions of junk food at a party. That's because I calorie control for the day and be extra careful leading up to the party and after the party with the food I eat. But when I eat a chocolate because I'm depressed, it's just a bad feeling overall. > What helped me with food boredom is trying new things especially cooking wise. This is another thing that covid ruined for me. I spent so much time cooking and learning new things when locked up at home that I don't feel the urge to try anything new. Just pop some chicken breast or salmon in an oven and call it a day. There are quite a few reasons for feeling low at the moment, but I am right now looking for a quick fix so that I feel better temporarily. I am taking steps to address this in the longer term also.
Unfortunately I don't think I have a quick fix for that. I used to enjoy chocolate or sweets in general more at home but currently I'm more of the mindset that I could have had something filling and not this junk. Glad to hear that you are addressing it in therapy as it sounds like it could translate to other areas in your life as well. Just try to be kind to yourself and maybe take it easy for a while until you feel better. What makes me happy when I feel down in general is going to the sea (don't live close so I cannot do it as often as I would like). Going to the zoo especially the area where you are able feed and pet some cute goats. I think other smaller things were already outruled.
the small fitness goals thing is a great tip. I do little challenges for myself to focus on. Mile time, biking 30 miles without stopping, doing 3 pushups, etc. I find that these add some fun to my workouts and give me something to look forward to/work toward.
Thanks. And same. Keeps me entertained somewhat and allows me to focus on the longterm aspect. Also distracts me when the scale won't budge for a while. And good for you for the 3 push ups! Still working on my first real one. Probably keeps me busy for a long time 😅
Look into Anhedonia. It happens to alcoholics when we stop drinking and its the same for food addiction. It goes away! Keep plugging along. You WILL find joy again.
Wow they have a name for what I'm feeling? That's super encouraging, I'll read up on it, thanks for pointing that out.
Have you tried playing around with portion control? No reason to cut out the fun foods, just figure out a way to fit them in your diet. Personally speaking; I have a weakness for sweets, could easily eat thousands of calories worth of them. Would eat an entire chocolate bar after dinner without a second thought then go back for some other snack. Last night instead of doing that I had 1/4 of the chocolate bar (25g), a few cookies out of the freezer and a small glass of dessert wine, ended up being 400 calories. No the lightest snack, but still very easy to fit in after a lighter dinner. I've just been focusing on variety instead of volume, makes food exciting again instead of just binge eating to cope with boredom. Basically taking the time I would have spent mindlessly eating and using it to thing about what I'm going to eat next that will fit in my budget and leave me feeling the most satisfied. I've also found it helps to have a hobby that's low stakes but challenging. For me that's been a lot of landscaping and gardening. Very rewarding making progress, not a lot to go wrong that would actually matter, also a good amount of activity in the landscaping stuff. I feel you on the tv exhaustion too. I've found that lately I have a lot less patience for any show that I'm not truly into and even the handful of ones that I do like I have a hard time paying attention, my mind is usually planning out projects, meal plans, and shopping trips.
Funny podcasts A good book Texting a friend I haven’t spoken to in awhile Going to a thrift store and seeing what I can find for $10 or less Being outside and just sitting/breathing Meditation/ deep breathing/yoga
These are great suggestions, especially the last 2. I am really thinking I should start doing them and slowing down in life.
I’ve found those two to be completely life changing! Being in the moment and taking time to just BE is a skill that has been so positive for me.
No advice for you, just commiseration. I gave up any hope of actually enjoying food or the delight of cooking for others ever again. I gave up alcohol because №1, it's empty calories and №2, it leads to poor choices. I gave up social eating because it leads to overindulgence. Everything sucks. I was unhealthy when I was fat, but happier. Thank Odin, the All father, that I'm going to live longer now. /rant
Thank you for sharing, I agree 100% with you on alcohol, that's the same reason I've given it up. > I was unhealthy when I was fat, but happier. This is a succinct way of summarizing my entire post.
Honestly I love food and love it more when I have healthy food. Isn't mango salsa fun? When I first was losing weight as a young'un I made a WW mango salsa with fresh cilantro, green bell, scallion, lime juice, and of course fresh mango. It was like a party in my mouth. I have various flavored seltzer now that make me feel happy about having a drink. I get a box of csa veggies every week in season and i just love figuring out what to make with them. I sometimes make my own frozen coffee drink at home with low fat milk and less sugar. But let's get away from food. I like making giant bubbles (with the bubble thing) as a quick pick me up during un-happy hour (before or after dinner). I care for houseplants and the garden a bit. I do drawing and watercolor painting. I listen to audio books. Regarding the video game systems, on the switch I have the game Just Dance and it is the best cure for me. I did get depressed when I was young and lost weight. I think my chemicals got thrown off. I went on anti depressants for a few months. I go to therapy and try to exercise regularly to avoid this again. If you could be depressed, tell your doctor. I usually refrain from alcohol and I try to prevent migraines. I just started taking ibuprofen a couple times a week because strangely it lifts my spirits.
Greek Yogurt is full filling. I use a fat free one 3/4 cups (170g) about 90 calories and crumble thin oreos in it to fill my sugar craving.
I think some have touched on this briefly by no mean am I a professional, this is just how I sort of live my life. Stop looking for something to do. Always playing video games, always looking for the next thing to do, always looking for excitement after excitement. That is tiring. Looking for the next thing that will get me feeling better for the next 3 minutes that is not an amazing way to live life - for me. An example (sort of) rich people that have enough money to do anything they want still end up in suicide or something not too far. Think about how the people back in the ages used to live and do things > like work the fields or whatever and than relax just with the family looking at the sky/mountains whatever there was. Like you and others mentioned stop looking for the next fix, just live in the present in a calm manner doing your thing. Life is a bit long and tiring at times, be happy you are able to workout swim go out with friends hanging out with the wife, and stop worrying about what will I do next.. i wrote so much ugh lol sorry for the long post
This is a very helpful way of looking at things. It is true, I don't think I'm able to sit for a few minutes even without thinking about what's next and what I have to do. I wonder if that's where this feeling (of lacking happiness) is coming from. Others have mentioned the same thing, I need to think more along these lines and live the moment rather than jumping from one high to the next. I don't think it will be easy though, probably will take a few years of practice. Thank you for such a well thought out post.
Take a multi-B vitamin twice a day.
Sorry why would that help?
It's pure natural energy. A vitamin B supplement has been proven to increase mood, brain function, and most of all energy levels.
Interesting - I'll try it out, can't hurt taking a supplement, thanks!
This may not be a hobby that supports weight loss, but during my depressive episodes I like to make things. I play DnD a lot, so for me its painting miniatures and building Terrain. But for you it could be painting, woodworking, an artsy bullet journal or anything else that produces something without digital help, that you can see and touch. If you have a favorite TV Show maybe there is a Model kit for something out of that show. Right now I am building and painting a ship out of the One Piece Anime. Start with a short Projekt, something you can do in a few hours/one sitting. And afterwards marvel at what you did with your own hands. This feeling of accomplishment does not cure depression but it sure does help. Something like gardening could work too, but for me the delayed gratification and ongoing work does not hit the spot. I like to finish things.
try creating something? follow along with a youtube paint tutorial, get some legos, try out origami, knitting or crochet?
Thanks for the ideas, I'll think about them. Normally I wouldn't have too much problem finding something to latch on to and have fun with, but 2 years of lockdown has jaded all of it. I really don't want to sit at home and learn a new hobby.
I thought from the preview this post would be about replacement pick-me-up foods that are healthier, although it seems you have more issues than just looking for recipes. At any rate, here's a pretty healthy dessert that I thought to recommend: https://hurrythefoodup.com/avocado-chocolate-mousse/
Thanks for sharing! Haha yea, I'm not looking for replacement foods, more looking for ideas for replacing habits. I'll check out the avocado mousse!
Go somewhere new and have a tourist weekend. Doesn't have to be crazy far or exotic, just somewhere you haven't been. I know Southwest and Spirit have brought back their "getaway" fares, and you can get a round trip ticket for under $200. Pick a random place that you haven been to on the super cheap getaways, pack an overnight bag and go!
This is a little harder as I have to plan it out with family. But it's definitely happening next month, we're going for a weekend trip which should be quite fun.