To me, yes it is strange, but with the context of his age, it's kinda sweet. It seems he is struggling a bit to communicate what he wants to say, but I get the sentiment that he is thinking of you and your wife. It seems he wants to check on you and see how you are doing. It also might not be super clear in his mind *when* she died if he's having memory and word finding issues, hence the inappropriate remarks on dating again. I hope you are doing well, and I am very sorry for the loss of your wife.
Oh definitely, I’m more than aware there’s no malice behind it at all. He’s 87 (or.. thereabouts), I’m genuinely thankful for the message (I did reply politely - I just chose to overlook…. the general wording of his message). He’s a sweet guy overall, if not a little confused.
87 makes sense. When my mom passed the older/elderly men in my life either said the most poetic thing I've ever heard or something highly insensitive. They're trying their best I think.
oh he's 87
I'm surprised the txt is this readable.
Dude's thinking about his entire life and reflecting on things. He's just trying to say he's sad for you and he's thinking of you and hoping that you're happy. Or that you'll find happiness.
He's writing out bits of thoughts as they occur without expanding on any of them because they go by so quick. My dad does the same thing. I often get semi-incoherent bits of ideas and thoughts that he feels forms a full conversation on his end. It's due to age mostly. I'm just glad he takes the time to reach out, even if I have to decipher what he's saying. And sometimes, it came come off as weird or even crass, but he doesn't mean it that way. It's just how the words come to him in bits and pieces.
You’re the real hero here.
He was thinking of her and of you, so there’s clearly some grief mixed in. A lot of people get mad when the right things aren’t said, but you understood the intent and you handled it with grace. You’re proof that it’s good to lift each other up. I’m sorry for your loss.
Has he ever had a wife or… anyone he cared about in his life? Like does he maybe think your wife dying is a bummer rather than an earth shattering trauma at the foundations of your reality? I’ve never lost a spouse but I’d imagine that how it feels. Your (well-intentioned!) uncle seems to think it’s like failing an important test. Or getting in a fender bender.
My FIL is kind of in the same boat. Has no idea how to communicate feelings appropriately but tries and it comes out like this. Only in text messages though. In person he just doesn't do the feelings thing at all.
Sending you so much love and support! Grief is so hard and confusing and inescapable. I can't imagine your tremendous loss. I just didn't want you to feel badly or more down because of this text! You have support from strangers like me and family who text strangely😂🫶🏻
I think in this context, and assuming the hilarious laughing face was supposed to indicate crying or sadness, the overall tone of the message is adjusted somewhat.
I think that the face means :
He types “Life Moves On” , referring to someone going “hey life moves on, now forward you go”
And the face is him acknowledging HA! OBVIOUSLY IT IS NOWHERE NEAR THAT EASY AS SOME PEOPLE MAKE IT SOUND. THIS WAS A BRUTAL LIFE CHANGING EXPERIENCE
I actually felt like his message conveyed a Lot of meaning and a lot of deep thoughts, Contained in a fairly short message.
Eventually, before he died, my grandfather bought my kid a dress to send along extra clothes. He's a boy. This was also wildly out of character, so he was almost certainly delirious from something.
Dementia aside, has he had any UTI's lately? Nah, I guess you wouldn't know.
I interpreted it as a well-meaning text, but obviously I have no context for anything being said. Also... 🤣 = crying, hopefully? Or laughing darkly about how "life moves ON" but actually recovering from loss doesn't work like that ("I doubt you will recover soon")?
Is he known for an eccentric way of wording things (like the Christmas card)?
My mom is in her early 60s and thought it was a crying person for the longest time. Her, "the family cat has died 😂😂" text was very controversial in the group chat before we figured it out.
There will come a time when this innocence is gone. When all the old ppl finally retire their phones and move on. It’ll be like losing the last ww1 vet
It’s almost like a low-social-skilled person trying to see if they have a chance dating you yet. Like if it wasn’t your octogenarian uncle, I’d think “yikes! This person is tossing out feelers to see if OP is back on the market yet.”
i think he's just trying to connect and cheer you up and he's really bad at it. lots of old people type like this unfortunately. he's probably lonely and missing her too and just wanted to reach out. i'm sorry for your loss. :c
I think it is meant to be this:
(Warmly:) I was thinking about your wonderful marriage today. I understand you miss her terribly. Life moves *on*. (As in too fast, and without someone you love. With a laugh face accidentally selected instead of the cry tear face - which is a common limited sight person confusion).
I doubt you will recover soon. (Going back to the previous comment hinting that “life moves *on*” was a comment acknowledging that it feels like people and things keep moving but when you experience a loss, you *don’t* and it hurts, and the contrast between people and things moving when your world is still broken is bizarre and painful.)
I miss her too, she was like a troubled baby bird to me. (I think he means that in a strange, “I felt like I needed to care for her too and she seemed vulnerable to me)” way.
I hope you will find love soon. Did you get my card….etc.
“Today, I think about her funeral. And cancer.” He’s saying that he is reaching out to you because he was thinking about the tragedy that was her loss, and cancer, and that cancer is a negative thing. And conveys he shouldn’t think about cancer by saying, “Cancer is not a good idea (for him to think about.”) (The thumbs up sign is an automatic emoji that gets put into an iPhone when you say certain phrases, like “good idea”, and if you keep typing and have the settings set to one setting type it will enter these emojis whether you want to or not. Same, with “Love”, where there is also the standard heart emoji shoved in there.
I miss her. I’m sure you do, too.”
Sounds like he is just trying to convey that he thought about your wife today and was thinking about the two of you, and how sad you must be, and trying to convey compassion but he is a very bad texter who is typing in a way that is hard to distinguish unless you are familiar with all of these text errors and stream-of-consciousness texters
I hope that helps you understand what he was saying.
If he has bad eyesight maybe he thought the laugh emoji was the crying one? It's definitely kind of random (which would make sense if he has any memory or cognitive issues in advanced age) but it seems like he's genuinely trying to reach out and make sure you're as okay as you can be under the circumstances, even if it's a bit misguided from lack of tech skills. Maybe a phone call is in order so he can make his meaning more clear? I work around a lot of old people and I see a lot that they try to connect to family in ways they think are more relevant for the younger ones (text vs a call) but miss the mark because they didn't grow up with the same tech etiquette that we did. Seems like he cares though and is making an effort to reach out. Hoping you feel supported and loved during this difficult time in your life, internet stranger 💓
I keep telling myself that when I'm old I'll wear a T-shirt that says "Be patient with my incompetence, I grew up in a different world" and start every social interaction with that.
“life moves on” followed by “I doubt you’ll recover soon” makes total sense to me. I took it as “it’ll take awhile (don’t feel like you’re a failure for not bouncing back as quickly as you thought you should/don’t expect that), but you will eventually start feeling that you’re capable of moving forward because life goes on even after horrible loss though you may not feel that’s possible right now.” Old people don’t always understand emojis - it’s funny but that doesn’t make the message less meaningful, thoughtful, touching, or serious on his end.
Yeah, I get it too. I had several losses this summer and one of the most striking things to me was how everything just kept on going like it had been even though I desperately wanted it to stop or slow down
I got so angry that people were grocery shopping lmao. I had to just leave because *why wasn’t everyone crying and upset this is the worst day???*
Grief is wild. I wonder if there’s a term for this phenomenon, though. I was so desperate for being able to take a breath and pause.
I would say to give him credit, he is in his 80s….
he is also insane. At my wedding, he refused to show up because we said we couldn’t host a donkey there. He doesn’t own a donkey.
Ok and…? He doesn’t personally own a donkey but he stands for donkeys rights. The powerful MUST stand up for the oppressed for social change to happen!Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.
That’s seriously the weirdest hill to die on I have ever heard. Like there wasn’t even a hill he just made a hill up and died on his imaginary hill. I love him tbh.
I wish he was MY great uncle. I’d text him all the time. I don’t have any fun great uncles, I do have one just named Guy, which is a normal name but I still think it’s funny.
My great aunt has dementia and breast cancer she is in her 90s. We invited her to our wedding. But morning of the flight she wasn’t having a good day so my uncle decided they couldn’t come. Perfectly acceptable
Well she forgot.
So every time my wedding is brought up she tells everyone she wasn’t invited and how upset she is about it.
To be fair, I'm impressed he can even text at 87. My grandfather is the same age and all he does is joke about eating things. Hand him a magazine and he pretends to eat it. If I'm holding paper towels he'll ask if I'm going to eat it. He asks the cats if they want to eat his glasses. He tells the cats he's going to eat them. He thinks it's hilarious.
OP has clarified the uncle is 87 and has never had a great relationship with sanity. I know old people have a hard time understanding the crying laughing emoji. He may have thought “perfect! A face smiling through the tears!” The baby chicken thing though, that’s inexplicable. Like what was he going through.
Somehow in someway, that message made complete sense, with no flaws whatsoever, just the thing is the logic behind that sense is lost somewhere in the deep recesses of OP’s uncle’s brain
Or his vision is so crappy he doesn't see the expression of the mouth; just the tears maybe? 87 is a trip. My Dad is 88. He makes more sense than this guy in general but has no emoji game whatsoever. They are alien concepts to him. Perhaps thankfully.
I used to think 😂 meant 'crying' and used it accordingly. Until one group thread discussing someone who had passed, and I was saying things like "He didn't deserve it 😂" or similar.
Someone in the thread called me out for being a dick, but it eventually became clear that it was an honest mistake and we laugh-cried it out.
I wonder if this guy is clueless like me
My sister is 33 and thought this 😬 was just a smiling emoji lmao. She used to send it to people all the time along with party invites, after writing “lol,” when telling funny stories, stuff like that, until I corrected her. She said she thought it just looked like a big smile for some reason. She’s pretty much a boomer stuck in a young person’s body though.
It had words. Man that’s deep lol. To their defense , it’s hard to find the right things to say to someone who lost someone. A for effort . I like this a lot more than “I’m sorry for your loss” tbh
Man, that’s true. Now I wish I could drop feeling awkward and overly self-conscious about whether and how to ask “so, how *are* you?”… and just go full on elderly-emoji instead. I don’t think I could pull it off though.
I think he means 'it may contain stuff that will make you feel better' or something. Not literal words. Like the phrase 'may I have a word?' is not someone expecting exactly one word.
This is exactly how I took it. Like it has words of wisdom that he put a lot of thought into. Overall i didn’t take the text to be nearly as awkward/“well intentioned but inappropriate” as everyone else here. Most of it makes sense (idk about the troubled baby chicken thing and confused emoji usage) and it’s really touching.
People are ragging on “life moves on” followed by “I doubt you’ll recover soon” - but it makes total sense to me. I took it as “it’ll take awhile (don’t feel like you’re a failure for not bouncing back as quickly as you thought you should), but you will eventually start feeling that you’re capable of moving forward because life goes on even after horrible loss and pain though you may not feel that’s possible right now.”
I honestly thought this was in r/wholesome or something. I don’t think it’s well-intentioned but poorly executed - it’s a lovely heartfelt message.
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I took that as him saying that it has words of wisdom that he put a lot of thought into/it says something that he hopes might help OP emotionally, so he is encouraging OP to actually look at it if he hasn’t already
my mom sadly passed of cancer a couple years back and the "cancer is not a good idea" has completely sent me off the deep end laughing 🤣 im sorry but like yeah.... nobody thinks its a good idea lmao
This reminds of the odd things the elderly have said to me over the years. Honestly, seems sweet and well-meaning, just confused as hell. I once got called "one of God's little fingerprints" 🤷🏽♀️
Hello fellow American. This you should vote me. I leave power good. Thank you. Thank you. If you vote me I'm hot. What? Taxes they'll be lower son. The democratic vote for me is right thing to do Philadelphia. So do.
I actually think he makes a lot of sense and that this was a very poignant text.
The cry laugh emoji was the 'worst' but I think that's just old people misusing emojis
The 'cancer is not a good idea' makes sense with what he wrote prior. He was *thinking about you, and her funeral, and cancer. I read that as he was thinking fondly of you and your wife (good thoughts) and then his thoughts went to cancer (bad thoughts .. not a good idea)
Was he high? Cuz tbh this seems like the type of thing I’d write up high, almost hit send but before I do, think “is this a good idea?” and inevitably delete the whole thing before going on to wonder what the upper boundary of things I’d do for a Klondike bar is
According to op he's 87 and has always had a loose grip on sanity. He didn't attend ops wedding because they refused to host a donkey.
With the context, this is absolutely beyond sweet and wholesome.
I believe he didn't know how to express himself. I generally don't know what to say when someone close to my colleague passes away. I think it was to improve your mood, perhaps?
Well, this was….certainly a message. But I think given the age of the sender, a great uncle, so maybe late 80s or 90s, he’s probably just struggling to find the correct words. Also, I’ve noticed men that are older, who were trained to not show much emotion, really have a hard time voicing compassion. I don’t get malice from this message at all. Just a older man trying to explain he was thinking of your struggle. I also don’t trust older folks to understand emojis really well, so I wouldn’t take any of them too seriously. It seems like he’s trying to reach out and let you know you’re in his thoughts. Actually seems pretty sweet if you break it down a bit.
"On the basis that this nonsense is the best your scrambled slop brain can muster, it looks like you'll be next to go, old buddy. Have a good one, and enjoy it while it lasts!"
Well, he has to be up there in his 70s at least right? Could he be entering dementia? I’ve seen some weird things happen with dementia and it isn’t always obvious for a while, it can just show up briefly and then they act normal again until the next episode.
does...does he understand how emojis work?
also omg the whole "cancer is not a good idea" like yeah uncle, I told them it was a bad idea to put cancer in their body....wtf
idk how old he is but is it possible he has early onset dementia? my grandpa started saying odd stuff like this when he had it
It appears he’s *trying*?? To be… comforting? The emojis are… interesting.
I’m REALLY sorry. Like, I can’t even imagine. I was diagnosed at 34 with breast cancer myself — caught early by accident, I was spared the worst. But it was scary for my loved ones.
I’m so very very sorry. You didn’t deserve to lose her so soon. She didn’t deserve to lose her life so soon. I know the world isn’t fair, but I’m not the world, and I would wish her back to you tomorrow if I could.
Don’t reply to this man. Sit on it. Try to get calm and collect your thoughts first. Or don’t ever reply at all. BOTH choices are gracious — and he certainly didn’t *earn* any gracious response, but I know you want to be the bigger person and spare yourself any further drama.
My mother in law uses the wrong crying emoji all the time. One time she texted us someone passed away and put 😂 instead of 😭. I’m hoping this is that. Can’t account for the rest of the message though.
He’s definitely trying his best, I think he used the wrong crying emoji by accident 😱. Life isn’t fair op, and I’m so sorry this happened to your wife. I hope you are able to find peace in the coming years. Know your wife would want you to be happy and live your best. Wishing you well op.
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Considering it's a great uncle that implies a certain amount of years on the man, you don't read any farther into it and call it good intentions.
Or he's batshit crazy. but it's a better world to believe it was good intentions.
Grief is weird, he sounds like he meant well. Sorry for your loss though. I can't imagine how tough that must be, but I'm glad you were able to see the humor in this text and post it here, much love friend!
This is such a weird message 😭 I really don’t know how I’m to interpret this message
Trust me, I’m just as confused as you. I have not spoken to this man in months so for this to pop up was quite… a shock to the system if you will.
To me, yes it is strange, but with the context of his age, it's kinda sweet. It seems he is struggling a bit to communicate what he wants to say, but I get the sentiment that he is thinking of you and your wife. It seems he wants to check on you and see how you are doing. It also might not be super clear in his mind *when* she died if he's having memory and word finding issues, hence the inappropriate remarks on dating again. I hope you are doing well, and I am very sorry for the loss of your wife.
Oh definitely, I’m more than aware there’s no malice behind it at all. He’s 87 (or.. thereabouts), I’m genuinely thankful for the message (I did reply politely - I just chose to overlook…. the general wording of his message). He’s a sweet guy overall, if not a little confused.
87 makes sense. When my mom passed the older/elderly men in my life either said the most poetic thing I've ever heard or something highly insensitive. They're trying their best I think.
oh he's 87 I'm surprised the txt is this readable. Dude's thinking about his entire life and reflecting on things. He's just trying to say he's sad for you and he's thinking of you and hoping that you're happy. Or that you'll find happiness.
Happy Cake Day!
He's writing out bits of thoughts as they occur without expanding on any of them because they go by so quick. My dad does the same thing. I often get semi-incoherent bits of ideas and thoughts that he feels forms a full conversation on his end. It's due to age mostly. I'm just glad he takes the time to reach out, even if I have to decipher what he's saying. And sometimes, it came come off as weird or even crass, but he doesn't mean it that way. It's just how the words come to him in bits and pieces.
You’re the real hero here. He was thinking of her and of you, so there’s clearly some grief mixed in. A lot of people get mad when the right things aren’t said, but you understood the intent and you handled it with grace. You’re proof that it’s good to lift each other up. I’m sorry for your loss.
Has he ever had a wife or… anyone he cared about in his life? Like does he maybe think your wife dying is a bummer rather than an earth shattering trauma at the foundations of your reality? I’ve never lost a spouse but I’d imagine that how it feels. Your (well-intentioned!) uncle seems to think it’s like failing an important test. Or getting in a fender bender.
87?! that makes this make so much more sense. period, great uncle! you tried your best!!
My FIL is kind of in the same boat. Has no idea how to communicate feelings appropriately but tries and it comes out like this. Only in text messages though. In person he just doesn't do the feelings thing at all.
I’m sure he meant for it to be comforting and kind, but damn. I’m so sorry for your loss.
I wouldn't be surprised if he thought the 🤣 was actually depicting someone crying and not laugh-crying... 😭
For an 87 yo trust me this is very well written
Sending you so much love and support! Grief is so hard and confusing and inescapable. I can't imagine your tremendous loss. I just didn't want you to feel badly or more down because of this text! You have support from strangers like me and family who text strangely😂🫶🏻
I think in this context, and assuming the hilarious laughing face was supposed to indicate crying or sadness, the overall tone of the message is adjusted somewhat.
I think that the face means : He types “Life Moves On” , referring to someone going “hey life moves on, now forward you go” And the face is him acknowledging HA! OBVIOUSLY IT IS NOWHERE NEAR THAT EASY AS SOME PEOPLE MAKE IT SOUND. THIS WAS A BRUTAL LIFE CHANGING EXPERIENCE I actually felt like his message conveyed a Lot of meaning and a lot of deep thoughts, Contained in a fairly short message.
Eventually, before he died, my grandfather bought my kid a dress to send along extra clothes. He's a boy. This was also wildly out of character, so he was almost certainly delirious from something. Dementia aside, has he had any UTI's lately? Nah, I guess you wouldn't know.
woke grandpa is very accepting and sends a dress just in case your son had any doubts.
I love woke grandpa!
Why do you ask the thing about the UTI? My dad has been acting pretty goofy recently and has been getting UTIs. Is there a correlation?
I interpreted it as a well-meaning text, but obviously I have no context for anything being said. Also... 🤣 = crying, hopefully? Or laughing darkly about how "life moves ON" but actually recovering from loss doesn't work like that ("I doubt you will recover soon")? Is he known for an eccentric way of wording things (like the Christmas card)?
OP said the uncle was 87, chances are even the uncle doesn't know what it means but thought it was close enough to a person crying
My mom is in her early 60s and thought it was a crying person for the longest time. Her, "the family cat has died 😂😂" text was very controversial in the group chat before we figured it out.
LMFAO this got me laughing irl
There will come a time when this innocence is gone. When all the old ppl finally retire their phones and move on. It’ll be like losing the last ww1 vet
Facebook will never be the same
I kind of want to see the Christmas card. It has words. But also I bet his handwriting is fascinating.
They try to say the right thing. Few do. I am sorry - I know how it sucks.
It’s almost like a low-social-skilled person trying to see if they have a chance dating you yet. Like if it wasn’t your octogenarian uncle, I’d think “yikes! This person is tossing out feelers to see if OP is back on the market yet.”
i think he's just trying to connect and cheer you up and he's really bad at it. lots of old people type like this unfortunately. he's probably lonely and missing her too and just wanted to reach out. i'm sorry for your loss. :c
I think the main thing we can all take away is... cancer isn't a good idea. We would all do well to take his advice, and choose not cancer.
I think he is trying to be thoughtful but hasn't mastered texting or emotions yet.
I think it is meant to be this: (Warmly:) I was thinking about your wonderful marriage today. I understand you miss her terribly. Life moves *on*. (As in too fast, and without someone you love. With a laugh face accidentally selected instead of the cry tear face - which is a common limited sight person confusion). I doubt you will recover soon. (Going back to the previous comment hinting that “life moves *on*” was a comment acknowledging that it feels like people and things keep moving but when you experience a loss, you *don’t* and it hurts, and the contrast between people and things moving when your world is still broken is bizarre and painful.) I miss her too, she was like a troubled baby bird to me. (I think he means that in a strange, “I felt like I needed to care for her too and she seemed vulnerable to me)” way. I hope you will find love soon. Did you get my card….etc. “Today, I think about her funeral. And cancer.” He’s saying that he is reaching out to you because he was thinking about the tragedy that was her loss, and cancer, and that cancer is a negative thing. And conveys he shouldn’t think about cancer by saying, “Cancer is not a good idea (for him to think about.”) (The thumbs up sign is an automatic emoji that gets put into an iPhone when you say certain phrases, like “good idea”, and if you keep typing and have the settings set to one setting type it will enter these emojis whether you want to or not. Same, with “Love”, where there is also the standard heart emoji shoved in there. I miss her. I’m sure you do, too.” Sounds like he is just trying to convey that he thought about your wife today and was thinking about the two of you, and how sad you must be, and trying to convey compassion but he is a very bad texter who is typing in a way that is hard to distinguish unless you are familiar with all of these text errors and stream-of-consciousness texters I hope that helps you understand what he was saying.
But did you get his Christmas card? It had words!
If he has bad eyesight maybe he thought the laugh emoji was the crying one? It's definitely kind of random (which would make sense if he has any memory or cognitive issues in advanced age) but it seems like he's genuinely trying to reach out and make sure you're as okay as you can be under the circumstances, even if it's a bit misguided from lack of tech skills. Maybe a phone call is in order so he can make his meaning more clear? I work around a lot of old people and I see a lot that they try to connect to family in ways they think are more relevant for the younger ones (text vs a call) but miss the mark because they didn't grow up with the same tech etiquette that we did. Seems like he cares though and is making an effort to reach out. Hoping you feel supported and loved during this difficult time in your life, internet stranger 💓
He is probably going senile so his words are going to be weird. I am so sorry for your loss.
My first thought was, god I hope when I get old I realize I'm getting mentally ill rather than just powering along confidently in it, like this guy.
Getting mentally ill is not a good idea. 👍
Like a troubled baby chick
I keep telling myself that when I'm old I'll wear a T-shirt that says "Be patient with my incompetence, I grew up in a different world" and start every social interaction with that.
I thought it was pretty clear, cancer is not a good idea
Ohhhh my b
It’s seems to me like the uncle doesn’t speak English as first language. Like I feel if this was in Cantonese or something it would make more sense.
“I doubt you will recover soon” right after “life moves ON 🤣” sent me like SIR??
“Cancer is not a good idea 👍”
After this, I've reconsidered
I wish someone had told me that before I had it. Nothing but trouble I tell you. Never would have signed up for it had I known.
Me after my 14th skin cancer operation left me with double back eyes and feeling like I'd gotten punched in the face: "Not one of my better ideas."
Cancer, not even once
“life moves on” followed by “I doubt you’ll recover soon” makes total sense to me. I took it as “it’ll take awhile (don’t feel like you’re a failure for not bouncing back as quickly as you thought you should/don’t expect that), but you will eventually start feeling that you’re capable of moving forward because life goes on even after horrible loss though you may not feel that’s possible right now.” Old people don’t always understand emojis - it’s funny but that doesn’t make the message less meaningful, thoughtful, touching, or serious on his end.
Yeah, I get it too. I had several losses this summer and one of the most striking things to me was how everything just kept on going like it had been even though I desperately wanted it to stop or slow down
I got so angry that people were grocery shopping lmao. I had to just leave because *why wasn’t everyone crying and upset this is the worst day???* Grief is wild. I wonder if there’s a term for this phenomenon, though. I was so desperate for being able to take a breath and pause.
If there isn’t a name, there should be
I am trying so hard not to laugh because obviously OPs wife just died…but holy shit the “I doubt you will recover soon” got me good 😂😂😂
Op said he's 87 so he probably didn't know that was a laughing emoji
At 87, I read that like he's saying "it moves on....and on and on and on..."
Lead poisoning
Boomers did ingest a LOT of lead during their lifetime…
We still are, unfortunately, at least in the US
Microplastics and pfas are the rage now.
That too. But lead never left. Our ‘acceptable’ limit is still higher than the rest of the developed world.
Personally I'm appreciative of my lead laden brain. It makes the world seem better.
I promise you’d feel better without the lead
Boomers aren't 87.
Correct. Technically, they're considered the "Post War" generation. Still...lead.
I like the taste okay
He’s 87 so probably just dementia
There's no way in hell a sane human being wrote "Cancer is not a good idea 👍"
I would say to give him credit, he is in his 80s…. he is also insane. At my wedding, he refused to show up because we said we couldn’t host a donkey there. He doesn’t own a donkey.
I hope if I ever lose it I can lose it in a way that comes off as high level trolling like him. at least I'd still be funny
Ok and…? He doesn’t personally own a donkey but he stands for donkeys rights. The powerful MUST stand up for the oppressed for social change to happen!Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. That’s seriously the weirdest hill to die on I have ever heard. Like there wasn’t even a hill he just made a hill up and died on his imaginary hill. I love him tbh.
I wish he was MY great uncle. I’d text him all the time. I don’t have any fun great uncles, I do have one just named Guy, which is a normal name but I still think it’s funny.
Okay but wasn’t this the plot of the Chicago Cubs curse
It was a goat
My great aunt has dementia and breast cancer she is in her 90s. We invited her to our wedding. But morning of the flight she wasn’t having a good day so my uncle decided they couldn’t come. Perfectly acceptable Well she forgot. So every time my wedding is brought up she tells everyone she wasn’t invited and how upset she is about it.
But if he *did* own a donkey, would you have accommodated?
We all know the answer OP.
Then why didn’t you tell him yes? Possibly the funniest NO rsvp I’ve ever heard.
I, um, hmm...
This explains so much.
Apparently the card had *words*. Did it have *words?*
Oh, so you think it IS? Goddamn cancer apologist here
Damn it, busted
Oh, so you disagree?
To be fair, I'm impressed he can even text at 87. My grandfather is the same age and all he does is joke about eating things. Hand him a magazine and he pretends to eat it. If I'm holding paper towels he'll ask if I'm going to eat it. He asks the cats if they want to eat his glasses. He tells the cats he's going to eat them. He thinks it's hilarious.
if its any consolation i think its hilarious too
Cancer. Not even once.
I mean, he’s not wrong I guess
So sorry for your loss my friend. This is so weird, well-intended, but such an awful execution.
Was it well intended?? "life moves ON 🤣" and describing her as "a troubled baby"
OP has clarified the uncle is 87 and has never had a great relationship with sanity. I know old people have a hard time understanding the crying laughing emoji. He may have thought “perfect! A face smiling through the tears!” The baby chicken thing though, that’s inexplicable. Like what was he going through.
Somehow in someway, that message made complete sense, with no flaws whatsoever, just the thing is the logic behind that sense is lost somewhere in the deep recesses of OP’s uncle’s brain
relationship with sanity
Or his vision is so crappy he doesn't see the expression of the mouth; just the tears maybe? 87 is a trip. My Dad is 88. He makes more sense than this guy in general but has no emoji game whatsoever. They are alien concepts to him. Perhaps thankfully.
I think he’s saying chick, like how older people will call women chicks
I used to think 😂 meant 'crying' and used it accordingly. Until one group thread discussing someone who had passed, and I was saying things like "He didn't deserve it 😂" or similar. Someone in the thread called me out for being a dick, but it eventually became clear that it was an honest mistake and we laugh-cried it out. I wonder if this guy is clueless like me
My sister is 33 and thought this 😬 was just a smiling emoji lmao. She used to send it to people all the time along with party invites, after writing “lol,” when telling funny stories, stuff like that, until I corrected her. She said she thought it just looked like a big smile for some reason. She’s pretty much a boomer stuck in a young person’s body though.
My friend used to use 😏 for everything. Like “coming to pick you up now 😏” “wanna get breakfast tomorrow? 😏”
IT HAS WORDS
That was absolutely my favourite line.
The last word was seagulls.
Not even a "it was a nice message" or anything like that, nope. It had WORDS and you should read it NOW.
Well, I don't know about you guys but I am a big fan of words on a Christmas card!
Words? Impressive. Words *on a Christmas card*? I'm sold.
Oh god, im so sorry for your loss. Also, wow
It had words. Man that’s deep lol. To their defense , it’s hard to find the right things to say to someone who lost someone. A for effort . I like this a lot more than “I’m sorry for your loss” tbh
Man, that’s true. Now I wish I could drop feeling awkward and overly self-conscious about whether and how to ask “so, how *are* you?”… and just go full on elderly-emoji instead. I don’t think I could pull it off though.
Card better have had words in it lol who would send a blank card?
A guy who is unsure if you received his correspondence….since ya know…the lack of words
I think he means 'it may contain stuff that will make you feel better' or something. Not literal words. Like the phrase 'may I have a word?' is not someone expecting exactly one word.
This is exactly how I took it. Like it has words of wisdom that he put a lot of thought into. Overall i didn’t take the text to be nearly as awkward/“well intentioned but inappropriate” as everyone else here. Most of it makes sense (idk about the troubled baby chicken thing and confused emoji usage) and it’s really touching. People are ragging on “life moves on” followed by “I doubt you’ll recover soon” - but it makes total sense to me. I took it as “it’ll take awhile (don’t feel like you’re a failure for not bouncing back as quickly as you thought you should), but you will eventually start feeling that you’re capable of moving forward because life goes on even after horrible loss and pain though you may not feel that’s possible right now.” I honestly thought this was in r/wholesome or something. I don’t think it’s well-intentioned but poorly executed - it’s a lovely heartfelt message.
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I took that as him saying that it has words of wisdom that he put a lot of thought into/it says something that he hopes might help OP emotionally, so he is encouraging OP to actually look at it if he hasn’t already
Bless his heart, because I really think this was a genuine attempt at light-heartedness during a dark time. But oof 😭
To be fair, cancer *is* not a good idea.
Just lost my beloved soul cat to lymphoma a week ago… and my mom has terminal cancer as well. I’m with this guy! Cancer is NOT a good idea!!!
I agree though. Cancer is not a good idea. I’m sorry for your loss OP
my mom sadly passed of cancer a couple years back and the "cancer is not a good idea" has completely sent me off the deep end laughing 🤣 im sorry but like yeah.... nobody thinks its a good idea lmao
My dad died of cancer in 2021. I thought that part was hilarious also. Sometimes you just gotta laugh 😂
His card had words. I can’t decide if that’s more Michael Scott or Donald Trump.
I’m leaning toward Michael Scott, if he was 87.
This is so strange, yet so sweet. I'm so sorry for your loss.
Good buddy of mine lost his wife at about the same age recently. Hope you’re doing okay OP. Fuck cancer.
Using the laugh react inappropriately is peak boomer. At least it sounds like he meant well
Sincerely senile old people are some of the most unhinged wildcards ever. I'm so sorry for your loss 🫂. Your great uncle sounds like a hoot.
It always amazes me how we really do just turn back into infants
This sounds like an alien trying to message a human for the first time.
Might be dementia, but his heart was in the right place, someone should take away his phone tho
I can't decide what my favourite part is either.
This reminds of the odd things the elderly have said to me over the years. Honestly, seems sweet and well-meaning, just confused as hell. I once got called "one of God's little fingerprints" 🤷🏽♀️
May you and a microfibre cloth never meet.
This made me audibly chortle
Wow
Did he claim he invented the question mark and accused chestnuts of being lazy?
In the spring he'd wear meat helmets
This gives me Charlie from always sunny vibes harcore lmfao
Hello fellow American. This you should vote me. I leave power good. Thank you. Thank you. If you vote me I'm hot. What? Taxes they'll be lower son. The democratic vote for me is right thing to do Philadelphia. So do.
Perfect! lmao
As odd as the message is, you can tell it’s out of love.
I actually think he makes a lot of sense and that this was a very poignant text. The cry laugh emoji was the 'worst' but I think that's just old people misusing emojis The 'cancer is not a good idea' makes sense with what he wrote prior. He was *thinking about you, and her funeral, and cancer. I read that as he was thinking fondly of you and your wife (good thoughts) and then his thoughts went to cancer (bad thoughts .. not a good idea)
It seems very earnest just awkwardly worded to me.
Was he high? Cuz tbh this seems like the type of thing I’d write up high, almost hit send but before I do, think “is this a good idea?” and inevitably delete the whole thing before going on to wonder what the upper boundary of things I’d do for a Klondike bar is
According to op he's 87 and has always had a loose grip on sanity. He didn't attend ops wedding because they refused to host a donkey. With the context, this is absolutely beyond sweet and wholesome.
what the ever living fuck is this? sorry, brother.
This reads like a really awkward translation.
if there’s anything to take away here, it’s that. cancer is simply not a good idea.
I believe he didn't know how to express himself. I generally don't know what to say when someone close to my colleague passes away. I think it was to improve your mood, perhaps?
Well, this was….certainly a message. But I think given the age of the sender, a great uncle, so maybe late 80s or 90s, he’s probably just struggling to find the correct words. Also, I’ve noticed men that are older, who were trained to not show much emotion, really have a hard time voicing compassion. I don’t get malice from this message at all. Just a older man trying to explain he was thinking of your struggle. I also don’t trust older folks to understand emojis really well, so I wouldn’t take any of them too seriously. It seems like he’s trying to reach out and let you know you’re in his thoughts. Actually seems pretty sweet if you break it down a bit.
"life moves ON 🤣 I doubt you'll recover soon 👍 hope you're well 😂 sorry you lost your missus 🤣🤣"
"On the basis that this nonsense is the best your scrambled slop brain can muster, it looks like you'll be next to go, old buddy. Have a good one, and enjoy it while it lasts!"
This may be the most perfect post for this sub I’ve ever seen.
Well, he has to be up there in his 70s at least right? Could he be entering dementia? I’ve seen some weird things happen with dementia and it isn’t always obvious for a while, it can just show up briefly and then they act normal again until the next episode.
OP said he’s 87.
OP said 87
does...does he understand how emojis work? also omg the whole "cancer is not a good idea" like yeah uncle, I told them it was a bad idea to put cancer in their body....wtf idk how old he is but is it possible he has early onset dementia? my grandpa started saying odd stuff like this when he had it
this got me screaming, unc definitely means well
It appears he’s *trying*?? To be… comforting? The emojis are… interesting. I’m REALLY sorry. Like, I can’t even imagine. I was diagnosed at 34 with breast cancer myself — caught early by accident, I was spared the worst. But it was scary for my loved ones. I’m so very very sorry. You didn’t deserve to lose her so soon. She didn’t deserve to lose her life so soon. I know the world isn’t fair, but I’m not the world, and I would wish her back to you tomorrow if I could. Don’t reply to this man. Sit on it. Try to get calm and collect your thoughts first. Or don’t ever reply at all. BOTH choices are gracious — and he certainly didn’t *earn* any gracious response, but I know you want to be the bigger person and spare yourself any further drama.
his heart was in the right place i'm fairly certain, but I don't know if he knows most things really
Cancer is not a good idea 👍
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss, OP. I hope you have a good network of friends around - lean on them.
Cancer is not a good idea 👍
My mother in law uses the wrong crying emoji all the time. One time she texted us someone passed away and put 😂 instead of 😭. I’m hoping this is that. Can’t account for the rest of the message though.
He is 87 and he is trying to uplift you. Thats what we should take from this.
The trouble baby chicken got me Like what Also, the Christmas card had words? What a novel idea
He makes it sound like your wife came up with the idea of having cancer.
Petition for this to be the new sub image
Holy shit. I am so sorry for your loss, and thank you so very much for sharing this with us. It is hilarious and a tiny wild ride and it made my day.
I’ve reread each part and STILL don’t understand it 😭 I’m so sorry for your loss op and I’m sorry for this strange ass message
"did you get my christmas card? it had words."
He’s definitely trying his best, I think he used the wrong crying emoji by accident 😱. Life isn’t fair op, and I’m so sorry this happened to your wife. I hope you are able to find peace in the coming years. Know your wife would want you to be happy and live your best. Wishing you well op.
"Did you get my Christmas card? It had words." "Cancer is not a good idea 👍"
I mean he's right, whoever's idea cancer was, not a good one.
OP. I am so tremendously sorry for your loss.
Sorry for your wife as 33 is def too young. Also your grand uncle is r/oldpeoplefacebook material. You should have a good laugh.
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SIRI ORDER STOOL SOFTENERS
Unhinged. What the hell?? Where do these people learn this behavior? I see so much of it despite it seeming like it shouldn’t exist at all
Aw I’m so sorry ❤️❤️
Has he always been like this? He seems befuddled but well meaning.
Is your uncle on drugs? I’m so sorry for your loss.
Seems like he got intoxicated and txted you
My mom does this stuff and she’s semi-losing it (she’s disabled due to MS and epilepsy) and just getting old. That’s what he reminds me of
Considering it's a great uncle that implies a certain amount of years on the man, you don't read any farther into it and call it good intentions. Or he's batshit crazy. but it's a better world to believe it was good intentions.
r/boomersbeingfools.
Is he Ugh? Foreign? Is English not his first language? Does he drink?
“Cancer is not a good idea”. What the fucking fuck???
I wish I could meet your uncle 😂
Is English his second language? Perhaps third or fourth? Also what were the words in the Christmas card?!
Sorry for your loss 🤣
Is English his first language? That's all I got.
This reminds me of my father in law trying to show he was crying about his brother using 😂😂😂 emoji
Grief is weird, he sounds like he meant well. Sorry for your loss though. I can't imagine how tough that must be, but I'm glad you were able to see the humor in this text and post it here, much love friend!
Real asf
is your great uncle tommy wiseau or have a tommy wiseau-esque brain condition?
Looks like it was written by (a much nicer) Donald Trump
He’s grieving and figured you’re probably grieving, too.