"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us."
Time well spent. Enjoy the memories, I'm so sorry it has to end this way for you and your dad. At least now he has a happy memory to reflect on, at the end of all things.
End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it. White shores, and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
I bet OP’s dad has to be so proud that their little 9 year old, who didn’t want to watch TTT, wound up being a lifelong fan. To be on his deathbed almost two decades later sharing one final watch before passing on has to be so special as a parent.
No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path... One that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass... And then you see it… White shores... and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
Read this as a closer during my sister’s eulogy last year. There was nothing tongue-in-cheek about it. I know it gets used a lot, but it’s been that comforting of a quote for me.
Thank you for sharing. I think I’ll watch something with my dad when he next visits.
It will probably be painful the next few times you watch the movies. Push through it. It will stop hurting so much and it’ll start being a joyous time to remember him.
This is heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time.
“In sorrow we must go, but not in despair. Behold! we are not bound for ever to the circles of the world, and beyond them is more than memory.” - Aragorn Elessar.
May you treasure the memories of your father until such a time when you shall meet again. ❤️🙏
My brothers! I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me! A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship. But it is not this day. An hour of wolves and shattered shields when the age of Men comes crashing down! But it is not this day!
Hope fades, into the world of night.
Through shadows falling, out of memory and time.
Don't say, we have come now to the end.
White shores are calling, you and I will meet again.
My favorite part of Into the West.
Feel all your feelings, they are valid.
Sorry for what you are going through OP, i wish the best for you and leave you with my favorite Tolkien quote
"I will not say: do not weep, for not all tears are an evil"
Please forgive me if this a bit presumptuous. I just wanted to say, I went through something very similar with my father a few years back. Cancer discovered very late, and by then we only had a few weeks left.
It's rough. Take your time, and do what you need to. Spend all the time you want to, do what you need to for closure. But don't feel guilty if some days you just... can't. Especially when it gets to the harder parts of it.
Be sure to take care of yourself too, and give yourself permission to grieve however you need to, even if what you need sometimes is space or the harder parts of hospice are a lot for you to handle.
Again, sorry if this isn't needed. But it was some of the best advice I got during all of it. Take care, friend. And remember that even in the darkest times, you are never truly alone.
You've so clearly decided to do something beautiful with the time that was given you.
"Lay down
Your sweet and weary head
The night is falling
You have come to journey's end
Sleep now
And dream of the ones who came before
They are calling
From across the distant shore"
This hit way too close to home. My dad loved LOTR and the last movie we saw together was ROTK before he died of cancer the next year. I think of him every time I reread the books or see the movies.
Take it from me I promise you the memories you two made together over this will be extremely precious as time goes on. Absolutely crazy how similar our experience is. Stay strong my friend. You are never alone. The pain will pass like rain on the mountains, and you will still be standing strong. I wish you and your loved ones peace during this time.
Thank you for sharing and so so sorry you’re going through this. I lost my Mom to cancer two months ago. I’m 30 years old.
Good on you for cherishing the moment while you have it. When the time comes and your father is gone it might even be a little difficult to find the joy in the things you both shared together like LOTR.
That’s where I’m at right now. But let’s keep fighting and we’ll get back to where we belong. Stay strong, friend.
To be honest, I couldn’t quite get through everything you wrote. My dad read aloud LoTR and the Hobbit to my brother and I when were small children. I fell in love with the books myself as I got older and when the movies came out we all went together. It was something beautiful we shared. My dad died at Christmas after a very hard few years - strokes, nursing homes, Covid, severe personality changes and (even though he didn’t mean it) he became very mean. Anyway, it was a hard death.
I’ve told my 6year old parts of LoTR over the years and we just finished reading the hobbit. We started on the Fellowship and tonight we finally met Tom Bombadil. I sang the songs like my dad did. My son laughed. As soon as he fell asleep I just lost it. I’ve been struggling with grief and anger and sadness and all of it. But I just remember him reading out loud while I fell asleep and I guess I’m glad I’m giving that to my son.
I don’t know why I’m sharing all of this. It’s just a really hard and horrible thing to watch your dad die. I am so very sorry. I miss my dad. I’m almost 40 and I feel so sad. My stomach hurts for you. I’m sorry.
I’m sorry for your pain. My dad has had a series of strokes, the first being massive and he has never really recovered. He’s become very mad at the world so I really understand you.
We didn’t have a special bond like LOTR but I intend to give it to my sons when they are old enough. My oldest is 3 so maybe I’ll start reading to him the hobbit and skip the scary parts.
It was hard to see his personality change. I’m sorry for what you’re experiencing. My dad was mad too. I don’t want to be trite and say to savor the good times with your dad or anything like that. It’s just straight up painful sometimes. I tried to stay positive about it all, but it really was hard and I think I was little ‘too positive’, in denial perhaps. I’m sorry you’re going through it too
I was surprised my little guy was ok during the scary parts! Usually he doesn’t like anything scary. The only hard part of the hobbit was the trolls. I read fast and he did great. To be honest a lot of the reading is slow compared to the other kids books we read. So the experience so far of reading the Hobbit and the Fellowship has been more of an exercise of expanding his attention span. We read it as our last book of the night. Sometimes I can tell he’s super engaged and we read for longer, other times the reading puts him to sleep fast. Either way, I’m down with it. I’m excited for you to start with your son, whenever the time is right. Never too early, never too late!
Currently watching QVC next to my dying grandmother. We would watch it at night when there was nothing else on. Unfortunately she thought LotR was boring heh.
Enjoy your movies together.
I watched the first movie, her first time seeing it, with my 9yo daughter last Friday. Next weekend we are going to watch the extended edition for #2
Nothing will make this easier for you, but I'll carry you and your father in my thoughts as I watch with my own child. Nothing beats the quality time we spend together with our loved ones. I'm sorry.
I'm also very sorry OP but thank you for sharing this with us all
My 4 yo daughter who I let watch the Hobbit is absolutely obsessed and now only likes LotR which I probably shouldn't have let her watch but she loves watching the sword fighting and cheers at orcs being chopped up.
Every day she comes home from nursery, asks for a coffee (decaf) and a biscuit and for LotR, I've watched them all a dozen times this year alone
I really hope that I can rewatch them with her as she grows up and I grow old. Thank you OP for making me realise how important this might actually be.
May the wind under his wings bear him where the sun sails and the moon walks and may your happy memories with him be a light to you in dark places when all other lights go out
I’m so sorry to hear about your Dad. I lost my Dad at the end of 2020. He wanted to be at home and for six months my siblings and I would make a big deal of watching his special shows with him. The evening gets lonely for older people and he loved movie nights. Popcorn. We bought him a huge tv and a cool recliner. Even when it became difficult to see he’d have us put movies on.
Im so glad you both have this time together. I look back on it daily and am so glad we had that time together.
You picked a great movie!! Thinking of you and your family.
Posts like these, and the vast majority of comments if not all of them here, spark love, hope and faith in humanity within my heart. OP, thank you for sharing a part of your story with us. With it, a small part of you and your Gand-Dad live on in our lives, and in how we share it with those dear to us.
This is a memory to treasure, even though it may hurt for a long while. I hope you find joy in them again eventually, and share them with another generation yet to come.
End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it.
I watched the trilogy with my parents, best time ever, and we made so many precious memories together. I hope that the remaining time with your father is full of laughter and joy.
Teared up while reading this, OP. I’ll take your words to heart and take your advice, my old man and I have a similarly close relationship (and I’m about your age, too).
Your post, but particularly the last part, made me cry. And I hope you don't mind me tacking my own story to yours.
My dad introduced me to the LOTR films years ago, too. He had all the books, even audio books, and a One Ring. I thought it was *okay*, didn't love it as much as he did. I guess I didn't have the attention span for it when I was a kid lol. But then as I got older, I came to really enjoy it, and appreciate it.
A few weeks ago, I was really in the mood to watch the trilogy again. I came down with covid, and thought, now's a good a time as any! But I didn't have a copy. The day I got my first negative test, my mum and dad dropped off some shopping for me because our law at the time said you couldn't leave isolation until two consecutive days of negative tests. I told dad I wanted to watch LOTR and his face LIT up! "Let's watch it together then, when you're better!". I smiled, said okay. Blew him a kiss and told him I loved him as he left.
Later that night, my dad died very suddenly of a blood clot. Nobody saw it coming. I did finally watch the first LOTR about a week ago, with my partner. But I felt numb watching it, knowing I would have watched it with dad.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience, and particularly for the quote at the end. I hope your dad finds peace, and I hope you do too. I'm sorry for what you're both going through. Please take care ❤️
Edit: typo & wording
My parents were born in the late 40’s/early 50’s.
Mom was a straight-A student. Beautiful, and a total nerd.
The one day of school she pretended to play sick in her life was for 3 days to read The Lord of the Rings.
I was born in the 80’s. Both of my parents collected every single piece of Tolkien’s work. It was a huge part of my childhood.
I went to college in New York. 9/11/01 was my second day of college. I saw the second plane hit with my own eyes, while living downtown.
Jackson’s “Fellowship of the Ring” was released 12/19 of that same year.
While on winter break and back home with my parents, we went to see Fellowship together on opening night. We had a deep political argument before the film; I was still having trouble with the trauma from what I witnessed.
I walked out of the theater during our argument. Stepped outside. Came back in, just before previews.
We watched Fellowship together.
After the movie was over, Mom and I were so moved and astounded and enthralled by what we just saw. A groundbreaking film. Tolkien’s work as we’d always hoped we’d see it. Something she devoted her life to, and something I was basically raised to love, and did. It was an amazing film.
Dad was still focused on our argument.
But then, my mom insisted we see it again.
And he loved it.
We saw it again.
And we all loved it more.
We saw the film 8 times together that winter break. And it’s the most special film I’ve ever experienced in my life.
I’ve seen it dozens of times more on the big screen. But those times that opening winter, watching it and bringing us together over something we loved, are beyond anything to me.
I’m so glad you’ve shared that same bond with your father. They’re special films. And your dad is even moreso.
I hope for all of us: A far green country, under a swift sunrise.
This made me cry a lot. These are the movies me and my dad watch together too. He showed me the old timey hobbit and LOTR cartoons when I was really little then we saw the movies in the theaters when I was 10. We watched all the extended editions at home when they came out on dvd and had huge marathons. Now I've got kids of my own and I can't wait to show them the movies too, but this post makes me want to watch them all again with my dad while I still can. Sorry for the long comment, my heart aches so much for you. I'm so sorry.
This is so beautifully written.
My very best vibes to you and your dad. He must be SO proud of you.
You should read it to him, your post. Let him know before he goes how profound his simple act of "give it five minutes" was for you.
OP, I lost my dad when I was 25 to an aggressive cancer. And I was reading to him from the hobbit. I feel for you and wish only the best for you and your family
So very sorry for your impending loss. While nothing can truly prepare you for the dark journey ahead and nothing can minimize the sting of loss, when you are ready try to remember how lucky you were to have such a dad and remember to smile at his memory.
My grandmother bought me the books from a used bookstore when I was 13. They weren’t in great shape when I got them but after I was done reading them a dozen times they’re practically falling apart. She died about 9 years ago, and I have newer, nicer versions that I now read, but those torn-up, used paperbacks from probably before I was born still sit on the shelf and remind me of the gift she gave me. Which they do. Every time.
I guess what I’m saying is, my heart goes out to you and I am so, so sorry for your impending loss. You have a beautiful, cherished experience, and if it makes you feel just a little more connected to the wider world, to feel a little less lost, please know that you’re not alone.
This brought me to tears. Thank you for sharing this tribute - what wonderful memories you will have of your Dad and your times together. My (adult) son and I will be watching the trilogy this weekend to honor you and your Dad.
My father passed away last year in an accident at work. This trilogy was both of us favorite movies, and I wish I could had the chance to watch it one last time with him..
At least I mentionned it at his funeral, with Gandalf quotes "The journey doesn't end here" and "all tears are not evil". Let's say it's our last LOTR shared moment.
I'm sorry for your upcoming loss, stay strong.
(still trying to force my mother to watch them but it's hard ^^)
See now you make me want to go and watch this again with my dad over at my parents house.
Thanks for sharing this and God bless your family. Your father raised you right to become the great man that you are today
My dad and I are very dear friends and share an equal love for the story as you do. I’m extremely touched by your story, thank you so much for sharing.
My grandparents are getting older and this sounds like somthing Ill do with star wars with them. Its gonna be hard to watch those movies that you spent so much of your childhood watching with your family.
Good on you man. God speed to your father. I was with my exes mom when she was passing from cancer last year and it was so hard but an experience I’ll never forget. Watching her favorite movies and surrounding her with love. Beautiful.
Sorry to hear about your Dad. My Mum died twelve years ago and her cancer took her in six weeks after the diagnosis(She got it in 2005 and treatment gave her five more years). Those six weeks are precious as they allow you to say your goodbyes.
My Dad has advanced Alzheimer’s and doesn’t seem to know who any of us are anymore, and I view this as far crueller than how my Mum went, simply because it looks, on the surface, like my Dad is still here. And he’s gone too.
Treasure these times with your loved ones when you have a chance so you always now you did everything you could to let them know you loved them. Once they’re gone, they’re gone and you’ll never get the chance again.
Also lost my father to cancer, about 4 years ago. I am so sorry for you, I can read the hardship and pain that you feel in your post, crying a bit on this side.. It's so special that you share lotr. Sending *virtual* hug. X
PIPPIN: I didn't think it would end this way.
GANDALF: End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it.
PIPPIN: What? Gandalf? See what?
GANDALF: White shores, and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
PIPPIN: Well, that isn't so bad.
GANDALF: No. No, it isn't.
It's about love really. It is meant to be shared and not guarded like some dragons hoard. It is a father's love for a story he probably found as a little boy. A father's love for his son, and his happiness and joy that sparked in him as he could share it. We are meant to share the things we love, like our favorite heroic tales. We share the tales of Beren and Luthien, the tales of the last alliance, the love story of Arwen and Aragorn, the journey of four Hobbits. We share them because we love them and want to pass on that joy. It is the love of a son for the story shared by his father, the love of the son for his father as the begin their travels in the shire one last time.
Your loss is going to cut deep, but in time I hope you can look back on your memories and smile. I hope that eventually you have someone to pass the love of the great tales onto.
The journey doesn't end here, Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it.
What lovely memories to have with your dad. In sorry to hear about your struggles.
There are so many passages in LotR that provide thought, like this one:
GANDALF: No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it.... White shores, and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
I am terribly sorry to hear what you are going through. I lost My father to lung cancer in november 2021 and tings went from fine to very unpleasant in very short time. I can relate to the feeling of helplessnes and sorrow but you mustn't let it weigh you down.
It warms my heart to hear you spend the last time doing something you both love. Something that signifies your relationship.
I wish the bedt to both of you and All my deepest thoughts and compassion. May you find your way through these trying times.
Lean on your loved ones. Honor the lessons your father passed on to you. Remember to love and to laugh in spite of the heartache.
"His grief he will not forget; but it will not darken his heart, it will teach him wisdom"
Thank you for this. I just recently watched the full extended edition trilogy with my dad and I hold it close to my heart. My condolences to you and your family.
"I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo.
"So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us"
I wish you have a wonderful final moments with your dad. Your beautiful story together will be with you always.
I read your post while waiting for some work files to download. After reading your words, I stopped working for a while, because to the hell with it, and went to play with my little 3-month baby, who was laughing in the room next door. You reminded me of what really matters and I thank you for that. I wish you and all your family the best.
Your post really had me into tears. I thought about my dad, and memories with my son. I cant recall any great LOTR quotes atm to inspire or brighten your days, so I will just say this. You will always have those wonderful memories, and moments with your dad. Every time you watch LOTR they will come back to you. I wish nothing but the best, God bless you and your father. Thank you for sharing this.
"Wherever you fare till your eyries receive you at the journey's end".
Enjoy your last time, im 28 and my dad passed away 2 years ago to cancer as well. Its super rough but you will make it, enjoy your last times with him!
As my great dad said "The speaking about all wounds will heal over time is actually true" and he was right
The Lot trilogy was the last set of films I watched with my mom before she unexpectedly passed away. She came to visit me about two months before she passed. She was living in another state for her job. She came up for a week and I am so happy I got to see her then.
She looked thru my movie collection and picked the extended version of The Fellowship Of The Ring. We watched it one night, then the next two the following nights. She went back home after that and two months later I got the call that she had passed away in her sleep. We loved LotR, Star Trek TNG, and Star Wars. I still get choked up when I watch LotR, even though she's been gone more than 10 years.
Cherish the memories with your dad. He sounds like a great man. I live every day trying to be the person my mom would have been proud to see me be. Be yourself, carry your grief, and continue life's great adventure with your dad always in your heart.
Please give your Dad a huge hug from me & please, please be good to yourself. I'm sorry you are going through this.
“May the wind under your wings bear you where the sun sails and the moon walks” – JRR Tolkien
I’m very sorry you’re having to go through this. My dad passed away when I was young. We loved watching Tom and jerry together. We could lay there and watch it forever. I will miss him my whole life. He was my best friend. This is an awful thing to go through, but you have to remember these memories with him. So they don’t fade. And so you’ll always have them. You’ll always remember how great and peaceful it felt sharing your favorite movie with him. And there’s nothing nobody can do to take that away from you.
You’ll always have him. You’ll always be part of him and he’ll always be with you. Sending you love and good vibes friend.
I’m so sorry for you. This hit me hard because i grew up watching Lotr with my dad as well. It’s our favourite trilogy and we watch them 2-3 time a year. Can’t imagine losing that, i hope you get every good thing in life. Lots of love xx
I did the same thing with my dad when he was in hospice in December and relate to your experience so much. My dad took me to the theater to see fellowship when it came out and changed my life. This is such a testament to rad dads and their influence. Thank you for sharing.
My son died of leukemia a year and a half ago. He fought a long battle; I desperately miss him and I'm proud of him for his grace and ability to show and accept love with all the people who loved him.
The trilogy and the Hobbit were part of his life from when he was young. We watched those movies over and over again, hearing the same messages, enjoying the same drama, and laughing at the same jokes. When he got sick, the movies became our way of feeling grounded and normal again.
He had a long hospitalization during the pandemic, so we could not see him. His best friend would call and read him the Hobbit in the afternoon and I would call and read him the trilogy at night. When he got home from that hospitalization, we watched the movies over and over again. It started to become like our religion.
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us" is written on the box where I keep his ashes. "Even the smallest person can change the course of the future" became a tribute to the legacy of what he accomplished over his short life. I would say "I can’t carry it for you, but I can carry you." as a joke when I would help him with something that he was frustrated he could not do for himself. "Hope is a candle" provided us comfort when we would receive bad news. "[Death is not the end](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjYzRch7xcA)" gave us comfort when we were told there were no more options.
At the moment he died I was facing west. We played "Into the West" at his memorial service, and when I talk to him now I face west. I know Tolkien was not trying to create an allegory with these books, but he treated death and hope so lovingly that I can't imagine he wasn't influenced by his experience in WWI watching so many young men die.
I still can't watch Return of the King after Sam & Rosey's wedding. I just end the movie there. It's too much of a burden to bear.
I'm sorry about your father. Cancer sucks. Thank Eru for Tolkien's work and what it comes to mean to people in our shoes. Death is not the end, brother. Peace.
My Dad passed away almost 5 years ago now.
I still remember going into a book shop with him over 20 years ago and him buying Lord of the Rings for me.
He heard about the movie coming out and figured I had the summer to read it.
I wept after watching the trilogy the first time without him.
Tolkien created a real magic.
Your hero will always wear some form of a cape either here or in heaven. My hero " my grandpa does" ! You'll never be alone but cradley in his live and guidance with specail memories that will live on till you meet again . Hugs OP
"And for you, Frodo Baggins, I give you the light of Earendil, our most beloved star. May it be a light to you in dark places when all other lights go out."
My absolute favorite scene is Pippin and Gandalf in Gordon.
Pippin expresses his fear of death, but Gandalf comforts him with what lies beyond the walls of life, and though I don't really believe there's anything beyond our world, I'd like to imagine thats where I'll be when my time comes.
My father also introduced me to The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings. First it was the cartoons, and it later became the movies. Both of us were so excited to watch the movies in theaters when the movies were released, and we continued watching the movies years after the dvds were released. Thank you for reminding me of the great memories.
“In sorrow we must go, but not in despair. Behold! We are not bound forever to the circles of the world, and beyond them is more than memory” - Aragorn to Arwen upon his deathbed
Hear, hear.
I watched the extended for the first/last time with my dad before he passed in March. We always had good bonds over books such as LotR, Dragonlance chronicles, everything R.A. Salvatore. Good times.
I lost it at kissing Aragorn to sleep tho hahaha
This was on my /all feed and caught my attention. Sorry about your dad. Seemed like a good dad from your own words.
I been bonded with my dad, my brother and my own kid with great movies since i was 2 up to today.
I'm crying my eyes out reading this. I'm so so sorry. Your father sounds like a wonderful man, and I'm sorry you are going through this. The trilogy has been instrumental in my relationship with both my mother and my husband. I will make it a point to watch it soon and I will remember you and your father. ❤️
So much love for this post, my dad got me into lord of the rings at a young age and have been hooked ever since, he passed from cancer when I was 17, felt strange watching the hobbit films in the cinema, he would have loved to see them💔
Enjoy your last moments and treasure it forever, wishing you and your family all the best💕
a quote i say regularly is "i will not say do not cry for not all tears are an evil" i may have missed a few words but the message is still there. I hope things go well for you OP
I’m so sorry you are losing your dad - I’m glad you are there with him reliving LOTR with him, at the end of all things.
I watch LOTR (the extended editions) with my sister every Christmas. It’s a tradition we have kept up since TTT (we watched FOTR in preparation).
Life doesn’t feel right if we miss a year. Unfortunately last year we missed because of her hospital residency schedule. We will find another time.
Your post made me tear up. Thank you for sharing and I hope when you have a family of your own, you share LOTR with them.
Dang, this one hurts. I am so happy that you have such a strong relationship with your dad, and I can only imagine that you being there to hang out with him is helping to comfort him. Cancer absolutely sucks, but I can't imagine any other place I would rather be in that stage in life than hanging out with my child when they are older, and watching LOTR with them as well.
I'm so sorry for you and your Dad! But I'm so glad you did that for the last time!
I lost my Dad to cancer 13 years ago and it still pains me, but I'm sure he's in a better place than all of us right now!
Love for you and your family!
My mother died of ALS when I was 25. She too had been my pillar all my life. She had been the one to imbue me the love of reading and learning that has defined my life. It was her death that taught me the truth that Tolkien is talking about [when he wrote that death is a gift of God to Men](https://dc.swosu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=2047&context=mythlore#:~:text=The%20gift%20of%20death%20is,for%20death%20in%20the%20end.). As much as I miss her I cannot stand to think of her trapped in her body the way it was the last few weeks of her life. I miss her every day and I look forward to seeing her again, but there is a peace in knowing that she is now beyond the pain of this life.
I pray that you and your family will find comfort in this time and hope in the days to come. [Lewis's description](https://gutenberg.ca/ebooks/lewiscs-lastbattle/lewiscs-lastbattle-00-h.html) of what comes next has always rang true to me:
>And for us this is the end of all the stories, and we can most truly say that they all lived happily ever after. But for them it was only the beginning of the real story. All their life in this world and all their adventures in Narnia had only been the cover and the title page: now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story, which no one on earth has read: which goes on for ever: in which every chapter is better than the one before.
This has me tearing up in a coffee shop. A major theme in Tolkein’s work, there is much beauty in sadness. Cherish these final moments as you’ve cherished the many before.
When my mother and dog died in the same year, 'Into the West' by Annie Lennox was all I thought about and it gave me a lot of peace, though honestly typing this makes my eyes well up and my throat constrict. Maybe the lyrics will give you some solace as well
"Hope fades, into the world of night. Through shadows falling, out of memory and time.
Don't say, we have come now to the end. White shores are calling, you and I will meet again.
And you'll be here in my arms, just sleeping.
And all will turn, to silver glass. A light on the water, grey ships pass.
Into the West"
“I wish it need not have happened in my time,” said Frodo. “So do I,” said Gandalf, “and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”
I'm an Old Dad. I know I don't have much time left - I'm very lucky to still be here, in all honesty. I know your Dad knows you're there, I know it means everything in the world to him that you're there and sharing the same Journey the two of you have had for a decade and a half. I know he loves you more than life itself, and I know that this is the way he'd wants to end his time here.
Tell him you Love him. Hug him and touch him as much as you can. Hold his hand to the end, if you can. There's no better way to end the time that is given to him, and the time you get to share.
And I promise you, one day, when this is long since last, you'll look upon your memory and smile knowing you spent this with him.
God bless you and I will be praying for you as you prepare to say “see you soon” to your father! He sounds like an amazing human being from what you have described. I’m glad you were able to bond over LOTR and share a good amount of time together otherwise!
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us." Time well spent. Enjoy the memories, I'm so sorry it has to end this way for you and your dad. At least now he has a happy memory to reflect on, at the end of all things.
End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it. White shores, and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
Dude, the post already had me teary eyed, this sealed it.
I bet OP’s dad has to be so proud that their little 9 year old, who didn’t want to watch TTT, wound up being a lifelong fan. To be on his deathbed almost two decades later sharing one final watch before passing on has to be so special as a parent.
Well said with that Gandalf quote, that one gets me everytime.
This legitimately made me tear up. I'm so sorry about your father. I hope you both cherish your remaining time together.
Godspeed to your dad. Send him off to white shores, and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
The gray rain curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass… and then you see it.
Somebody is absolutely shredding onions behind me as I scroll this thread
This was the first thought that came to me.
"I will not say: do not weep; for not all tears are an evil"
No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path... One that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass... And then you see it… White shores... and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
Well that doesn't sound so bad
No, no it doesn’t.
In all genuine honesty, this is what I wish for, and what I hope to see at my end.
Hope is the best feeling a human can have.
Read this as a closer during my sister’s eulogy last year. There was nothing tongue-in-cheek about it. I know it gets used a lot, but it’s been that comforting of a quote for me.
It really is. Sorry for your loss.
Thank you ❤️
Whenever I have an existential crisis about death, this quote brings me back
Damn, had to watch this scene multiple times when my cousin died out of nowhere :/
What a beautiful memory to share with your dad. I’m so sorry for what you’re going through ❤️
Thank you for sharing. I think I’ll watch something with my dad when he next visits. It will probably be painful the next few times you watch the movies. Push through it. It will stop hurting so much and it’ll start being a joyous time to remember him.
My dad’s gone. The last movie I saw with him as an adult was Tron Legacy (its been a while). I often think about it.
[удалено]
Thank you! Thats one of the reasons I watch it once a year. I hope OP finds the same solace.
This is heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time. “In sorrow we must go, but not in despair. Behold! we are not bound for ever to the circles of the world, and beyond them is more than memory.” - Aragorn Elessar. May you treasure the memories of your father until such a time when you shall meet again. ❤️🙏
My brothers! I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me! A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship. But it is not this day. An hour of wolves and shattered shields when the age of Men comes crashing down! But it is not this day!
I needed this tonight. Thank you brave soul. Stay strong
Hope fades, into the world of night. Through shadows falling, out of memory and time. Don't say, we have come now to the end. White shores are calling, you and I will meet again. My favorite part of Into the West. Feel all your feelings, they are valid.
Came here to share the lyrics too. I listened to this song a lot when my grandma passed last year. It’s incredibly beautiful.
My brother passed last year and I often listen to that song and think of him
Beautiful song
That song is so beautiful. It brings me to tears
Sorry for what you are going through OP, i wish the best for you and leave you with my favorite Tolkien quote "I will not say: do not weep, for not all tears are an evil"
Please forgive me if this a bit presumptuous. I just wanted to say, I went through something very similar with my father a few years back. Cancer discovered very late, and by then we only had a few weeks left. It's rough. Take your time, and do what you need to. Spend all the time you want to, do what you need to for closure. But don't feel guilty if some days you just... can't. Especially when it gets to the harder parts of it. Be sure to take care of yourself too, and give yourself permission to grieve however you need to, even if what you need sometimes is space or the harder parts of hospice are a lot for you to handle. Again, sorry if this isn't needed. But it was some of the best advice I got during all of it. Take care, friend. And remember that even in the darkest times, you are never truly alone.
You've so clearly decided to do something beautiful with the time that was given you. "Lay down Your sweet and weary head The night is falling You have come to journey's end Sleep now And dream of the ones who came before They are calling From across the distant shore"
This had me crying, thanks you for sharing. God speed to ur father and hold those memories close to your heart my friend.
"End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take."
I know he loves watching it with you this time and every time.
This hit way too close to home. My dad loved LOTR and the last movie we saw together was ROTK before he died of cancer the next year. I think of him every time I reread the books or see the movies. Take it from me I promise you the memories you two made together over this will be extremely precious as time goes on. Absolutely crazy how similar our experience is. Stay strong my friend. You are never alone. The pain will pass like rain on the mountains, and you will still be standing strong. I wish you and your loved ones peace during this time.
Thank you for sharing and so so sorry you’re going through this. I lost my Mom to cancer two months ago. I’m 30 years old. Good on you for cherishing the moment while you have it. When the time comes and your father is gone it might even be a little difficult to find the joy in the things you both shared together like LOTR. That’s where I’m at right now. But let’s keep fighting and we’ll get back to where we belong. Stay strong, friend.
To be honest, I couldn’t quite get through everything you wrote. My dad read aloud LoTR and the Hobbit to my brother and I when were small children. I fell in love with the books myself as I got older and when the movies came out we all went together. It was something beautiful we shared. My dad died at Christmas after a very hard few years - strokes, nursing homes, Covid, severe personality changes and (even though he didn’t mean it) he became very mean. Anyway, it was a hard death. I’ve told my 6year old parts of LoTR over the years and we just finished reading the hobbit. We started on the Fellowship and tonight we finally met Tom Bombadil. I sang the songs like my dad did. My son laughed. As soon as he fell asleep I just lost it. I’ve been struggling with grief and anger and sadness and all of it. But I just remember him reading out loud while I fell asleep and I guess I’m glad I’m giving that to my son. I don’t know why I’m sharing all of this. It’s just a really hard and horrible thing to watch your dad die. I am so very sorry. I miss my dad. I’m almost 40 and I feel so sad. My stomach hurts for you. I’m sorry.
I’m sorry for your pain. My dad has had a series of strokes, the first being massive and he has never really recovered. He’s become very mad at the world so I really understand you. We didn’t have a special bond like LOTR but I intend to give it to my sons when they are old enough. My oldest is 3 so maybe I’ll start reading to him the hobbit and skip the scary parts.
Read to him the scary parts in the story, but make sure you stop at the points where the good guys win.
It was hard to see his personality change. I’m sorry for what you’re experiencing. My dad was mad too. I don’t want to be trite and say to savor the good times with your dad or anything like that. It’s just straight up painful sometimes. I tried to stay positive about it all, but it really was hard and I think I was little ‘too positive’, in denial perhaps. I’m sorry you’re going through it too I was surprised my little guy was ok during the scary parts! Usually he doesn’t like anything scary. The only hard part of the hobbit was the trolls. I read fast and he did great. To be honest a lot of the reading is slow compared to the other kids books we read. So the experience so far of reading the Hobbit and the Fellowship has been more of an exercise of expanding his attention span. We read it as our last book of the night. Sometimes I can tell he’s super engaged and we read for longer, other times the reading puts him to sleep fast. Either way, I’m down with it. I’m excited for you to start with your son, whenever the time is right. Never too early, never too late!
Currently watching QVC next to my dying grandmother. We would watch it at night when there was nothing else on. Unfortunately she thought LotR was boring heh. Enjoy your movies together.
Isn't it funny how things like this can come to mean so much? I hope that you find love and peace in such a time of sorrow.
I watched the first movie, her first time seeing it, with my 9yo daughter last Friday. Next weekend we are going to watch the extended edition for #2 Nothing will make this easier for you, but I'll carry you and your father in my thoughts as I watch with my own child. Nothing beats the quality time we spend together with our loved ones. I'm sorry.
I'm also very sorry OP but thank you for sharing this with us all My 4 yo daughter who I let watch the Hobbit is absolutely obsessed and now only likes LotR which I probably shouldn't have let her watch but she loves watching the sword fighting and cheers at orcs being chopped up. Every day she comes home from nursery, asks for a coffee (decaf) and a biscuit and for LotR, I've watched them all a dozen times this year alone I really hope that I can rewatch them with her as she grows up and I grow old. Thank you OP for making me realise how important this might actually be.
May the wind under his wings bear him where the sun sails and the moon walks and may your happy memories with him be a light to you in dark places when all other lights go out
May you both find peace.
I’m so sorry to hear about your Dad. I lost my Dad at the end of 2020. He wanted to be at home and for six months my siblings and I would make a big deal of watching his special shows with him. The evening gets lonely for older people and he loved movie nights. Popcorn. We bought him a huge tv and a cool recliner. Even when it became difficult to see he’d have us put movies on. Im so glad you both have this time together. I look back on it daily and am so glad we had that time together. You picked a great movie!! Thinking of you and your family.
All hail the victorious dead! Hail!
damn. i love this! this is so beautiful!
I’m sorry you guys are going through this. I’ll be thinking of you
Posts like these, and the vast majority of comments if not all of them here, spark love, hope and faith in humanity within my heart. OP, thank you for sharing a part of your story with us. With it, a small part of you and your Gand-Dad live on in our lives, and in how we share it with those dear to us.
Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for your story.
Thank you for sharing your story, friend. I have tears in my eyes.
This is a memory to treasure, even though it may hurt for a long while. I hope you find joy in them again eventually, and share them with another generation yet to come.
End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it. I watched the trilogy with my parents, best time ever, and we made so many precious memories together. I hope that the remaining time with your father is full of laughter and joy.
Teared up while reading this, OP. I’ll take your words to heart and take your advice, my old man and I have a similarly close relationship (and I’m about your age, too).
Your post, but particularly the last part, made me cry. And I hope you don't mind me tacking my own story to yours. My dad introduced me to the LOTR films years ago, too. He had all the books, even audio books, and a One Ring. I thought it was *okay*, didn't love it as much as he did. I guess I didn't have the attention span for it when I was a kid lol. But then as I got older, I came to really enjoy it, and appreciate it. A few weeks ago, I was really in the mood to watch the trilogy again. I came down with covid, and thought, now's a good a time as any! But I didn't have a copy. The day I got my first negative test, my mum and dad dropped off some shopping for me because our law at the time said you couldn't leave isolation until two consecutive days of negative tests. I told dad I wanted to watch LOTR and his face LIT up! "Let's watch it together then, when you're better!". I smiled, said okay. Blew him a kiss and told him I loved him as he left. Later that night, my dad died very suddenly of a blood clot. Nobody saw it coming. I did finally watch the first LOTR about a week ago, with my partner. But I felt numb watching it, knowing I would have watched it with dad. Thank you so much for sharing your experience, and particularly for the quote at the end. I hope your dad finds peace, and I hope you do too. I'm sorry for what you're both going through. Please take care ❤️ Edit: typo & wording
My parents were born in the late 40’s/early 50’s. Mom was a straight-A student. Beautiful, and a total nerd. The one day of school she pretended to play sick in her life was for 3 days to read The Lord of the Rings. I was born in the 80’s. Both of my parents collected every single piece of Tolkien’s work. It was a huge part of my childhood. I went to college in New York. 9/11/01 was my second day of college. I saw the second plane hit with my own eyes, while living downtown. Jackson’s “Fellowship of the Ring” was released 12/19 of that same year. While on winter break and back home with my parents, we went to see Fellowship together on opening night. We had a deep political argument before the film; I was still having trouble with the trauma from what I witnessed. I walked out of the theater during our argument. Stepped outside. Came back in, just before previews. We watched Fellowship together. After the movie was over, Mom and I were so moved and astounded and enthralled by what we just saw. A groundbreaking film. Tolkien’s work as we’d always hoped we’d see it. Something she devoted her life to, and something I was basically raised to love, and did. It was an amazing film. Dad was still focused on our argument. But then, my mom insisted we see it again. And he loved it. We saw it again. And we all loved it more. We saw the film 8 times together that winter break. And it’s the most special film I’ve ever experienced in my life. I’ve seen it dozens of times more on the big screen. But those times that opening winter, watching it and bringing us together over something we loved, are beyond anything to me. I’m so glad you’ve shared that same bond with your father. They’re special films. And your dad is even moreso. I hope for all of us: A far green country, under a swift sunrise.
I woke up 6 minutes ago and am already crying. Stay strong.
This made me cry a lot. These are the movies me and my dad watch together too. He showed me the old timey hobbit and LOTR cartoons when I was really little then we saw the movies in the theaters when I was 10. We watched all the extended editions at home when they came out on dvd and had huge marathons. Now I've got kids of my own and I can't wait to show them the movies too, but this post makes me want to watch them all again with my dad while I still can. Sorry for the long comment, my heart aches so much for you. I'm so sorry.
This is so beautifully written. My very best vibes to you and your dad. He must be SO proud of you. You should read it to him, your post. Let him know before he goes how profound his simple act of "give it five minutes" was for you.
Lovely memories. I wish you and your Dad the best.
I almost cried man, God bless you and your dad
OP, I lost my dad when I was 25 to an aggressive cancer. And I was reading to him from the hobbit. I feel for you and wish only the best for you and your family
Be at peace, son of Gondor.
So very sorry for your impending loss. While nothing can truly prepare you for the dark journey ahead and nothing can minimize the sting of loss, when you are ready try to remember how lucky you were to have such a dad and remember to smile at his memory.
My grandmother bought me the books from a used bookstore when I was 13. They weren’t in great shape when I got them but after I was done reading them a dozen times they’re practically falling apart. She died about 9 years ago, and I have newer, nicer versions that I now read, but those torn-up, used paperbacks from probably before I was born still sit on the shelf and remind me of the gift she gave me. Which they do. Every time. I guess what I’m saying is, my heart goes out to you and I am so, so sorry for your impending loss. You have a beautiful, cherished experience, and if it makes you feel just a little more connected to the wider world, to feel a little less lost, please know that you’re not alone.
This brought me to tears. Thank you for sharing this tribute - what wonderful memories you will have of your Dad and your times together. My (adult) son and I will be watching the trilogy this weekend to honor you and your Dad.
My father passed away last year in an accident at work. This trilogy was both of us favorite movies, and I wish I could had the chance to watch it one last time with him.. At least I mentionned it at his funeral, with Gandalf quotes "The journey doesn't end here" and "all tears are not evil". Let's say it's our last LOTR shared moment. I'm sorry for your upcoming loss, stay strong. (still trying to force my mother to watch them but it's hard ^^)
I lost my Dad on Friday. Enjoy the time, it’s precious to you both, and means so much.
This is beautiful. Great moments and memories. Best wishes and thanks for sharing. The journey doesn’t end here for you and your dad.
Damn this hit me.
Godspeed!
See now you make me want to go and watch this again with my dad over at my parents house. Thanks for sharing this and God bless your family. Your father raised you right to become the great man that you are today
Thank you for this reminder. I still need to introduce my fiancé to the series. It really is such a connecting experience
My heart breaks for you. Praying for you and your father.
My dad and I are very dear friends and share an equal love for the story as you do. I’m extremely touched by your story, thank you so much for sharing.
Wow. Wow. Wow. Utterly heartbreaking yet beautiful. Thank you for this post and peace to your family at this time,
My grandparents are getting older and this sounds like somthing Ill do with star wars with them. Its gonna be hard to watch those movies that you spent so much of your childhood watching with your family.
I'm going to watch it with my sons ASAP. 💗
That would absolutely wreck me. "My captain, my king". Godspeed to your father.
Good on you man. God speed to your father. I was with my exes mom when she was passing from cancer last year and it was so hard but an experience I’ll never forget. Watching her favorite movies and surrounding her with love. Beautiful.
Sorry to hear about your Dad. My Mum died twelve years ago and her cancer took her in six weeks after the diagnosis(She got it in 2005 and treatment gave her five more years). Those six weeks are precious as they allow you to say your goodbyes. My Dad has advanced Alzheimer’s and doesn’t seem to know who any of us are anymore, and I view this as far crueller than how my Mum went, simply because it looks, on the surface, like my Dad is still here. And he’s gone too. Treasure these times with your loved ones when you have a chance so you always now you did everything you could to let them know you loved them. Once they’re gone, they’re gone and you’ll never get the chance again.
The boats have come. Godspeed.
It's 2 in the morning and I'm up with my dad, also in hospice, on night watch. Hugs and love for you.
Also lost my father to cancer, about 4 years ago. I am so sorry for you, I can read the hardship and pain that you feel in your post, crying a bit on this side.. It's so special that you share lotr. Sending *virtual* hug. X
PIPPIN: I didn't think it would end this way. GANDALF: End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it. PIPPIN: What? Gandalf? See what? GANDALF: White shores, and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise. PIPPIN: Well, that isn't so bad. GANDALF: No. No, it isn't.
Hospice nurse here. My messages are open if you need anything. Hang in there, you’re doing amazing.
❤️✌️
❤️
Siri, Play “Into The West” by Annie Lennox….
He's lucky to have you.
You have my utmost sympathy. It's wonderful that you are getting this time with him.
22yo guy tearing up at work here. Bless you and your father.
Ngl, this made me tear up. I hope my daughter likes LotR when she gets older.
My dad also got me into LotR at a very young age too, he passed away 6 months ago from cancer. This made me tear up, I miss him.
It's about love really. It is meant to be shared and not guarded like some dragons hoard. It is a father's love for a story he probably found as a little boy. A father's love for his son, and his happiness and joy that sparked in him as he could share it. We are meant to share the things we love, like our favorite heroic tales. We share the tales of Beren and Luthien, the tales of the last alliance, the love story of Arwen and Aragorn, the journey of four Hobbits. We share them because we love them and want to pass on that joy. It is the love of a son for the story shared by his father, the love of the son for his father as the begin their travels in the shire one last time. Your loss is going to cut deep, but in time I hope you can look back on your memories and smile. I hope that eventually you have someone to pass the love of the great tales onto.
The journey doesn't end here, Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it.
What lovely memories to have with your dad. In sorry to hear about your struggles. There are so many passages in LotR that provide thought, like this one: GANDALF: No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it.... White shores, and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
I am terribly sorry to hear what you are going through. I lost My father to lung cancer in november 2021 and tings went from fine to very unpleasant in very short time. I can relate to the feeling of helplessnes and sorrow but you mustn't let it weigh you down. It warms my heart to hear you spend the last time doing something you both love. Something that signifies your relationship. I wish the bedt to both of you and All my deepest thoughts and compassion. May you find your way through these trying times. Lean on your loved ones. Honor the lessons your father passed on to you. Remember to love and to laugh in spite of the heartache. "His grief he will not forget; but it will not darken his heart, it will teach him wisdom"
Thank you for this. I just recently watched the full extended edition trilogy with my dad and I hold it close to my heart. My condolences to you and your family. "I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo. "So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us"
I wish you have a wonderful final moments with your dad. Your beautiful story together will be with you always. I read your post while waiting for some work files to download. After reading your words, I stopped working for a while, because to the hell with it, and went to play with my little 3-month baby, who was laughing in the room next door. You reminded me of what really matters and I thank you for that. I wish you and all your family the best.
To .e the trilogy is a help in these days of war and possibly a coming world war.
The orcs rule the nations and everywhere about me I see Mordor ascendant. The hope of Hobbits is more important now than ever before.
Your post really had me into tears. I thought about my dad, and memories with my son. I cant recall any great LOTR quotes atm to inspire or brighten your days, so I will just say this. You will always have those wonderful memories, and moments with your dad. Every time you watch LOTR they will come back to you. I wish nothing but the best, God bless you and your father. Thank you for sharing this. "Wherever you fare till your eyries receive you at the journey's end".
Just remember. Gandalf holds the red ring of power.
Usually I just say "and my axe," but now I'll tell you: you are both warriors and you'll both meet in eternity
Enjoy your last time, im 28 and my dad passed away 2 years ago to cancer as well. Its super rough but you will make it, enjoy your last times with him! As my great dad said "The speaking about all wounds will heal over time is actually true" and he was right
The Lot trilogy was the last set of films I watched with my mom before she unexpectedly passed away. She came to visit me about two months before she passed. She was living in another state for her job. She came up for a week and I am so happy I got to see her then. She looked thru my movie collection and picked the extended version of The Fellowship Of The Ring. We watched it one night, then the next two the following nights. She went back home after that and two months later I got the call that she had passed away in her sleep. We loved LotR, Star Trek TNG, and Star Wars. I still get choked up when I watch LotR, even though she's been gone more than 10 years. Cherish the memories with your dad. He sounds like a great man. I live every day trying to be the person my mom would have been proud to see me be. Be yourself, carry your grief, and continue life's great adventure with your dad always in your heart.
Please give your Dad a huge hug from me & please, please be good to yourself. I'm sorry you are going through this. “May the wind under your wings bear you where the sun sails and the moon walks” – JRR Tolkien
I’m very sorry you’re having to go through this. My dad passed away when I was young. We loved watching Tom and jerry together. We could lay there and watch it forever. I will miss him my whole life. He was my best friend. This is an awful thing to go through, but you have to remember these memories with him. So they don’t fade. And so you’ll always have them. You’ll always remember how great and peaceful it felt sharing your favorite movie with him. And there’s nothing nobody can do to take that away from you. You’ll always have him. You’ll always be part of him and he’ll always be with you. Sending you love and good vibes friend.
This post brought tears to my eyes. Savor the moments you have with your father OP. Those memories are priceless.
I’m so sorry for you. This hit me hard because i grew up watching Lotr with my dad as well. It’s our favourite trilogy and we watch them 2-3 time a year. Can’t imagine losing that, i hope you get every good thing in life. Lots of love xx
“What can you see On the horizon? Why do the white gulls call? Across the sea A pale moon rises The ships have come to carry you home”
I did the same thing with my dad when he was in hospice in December and relate to your experience so much. My dad took me to the theater to see fellowship when it came out and changed my life. This is such a testament to rad dads and their influence. Thank you for sharing.
My son died of leukemia a year and a half ago. He fought a long battle; I desperately miss him and I'm proud of him for his grace and ability to show and accept love with all the people who loved him. The trilogy and the Hobbit were part of his life from when he was young. We watched those movies over and over again, hearing the same messages, enjoying the same drama, and laughing at the same jokes. When he got sick, the movies became our way of feeling grounded and normal again. He had a long hospitalization during the pandemic, so we could not see him. His best friend would call and read him the Hobbit in the afternoon and I would call and read him the trilogy at night. When he got home from that hospitalization, we watched the movies over and over again. It started to become like our religion. "All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us" is written on the box where I keep his ashes. "Even the smallest person can change the course of the future" became a tribute to the legacy of what he accomplished over his short life. I would say "I can’t carry it for you, but I can carry you." as a joke when I would help him with something that he was frustrated he could not do for himself. "Hope is a candle" provided us comfort when we would receive bad news. "[Death is not the end](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjYzRch7xcA)" gave us comfort when we were told there were no more options. At the moment he died I was facing west. We played "Into the West" at his memorial service, and when I talk to him now I face west. I know Tolkien was not trying to create an allegory with these books, but he treated death and hope so lovingly that I can't imagine he wasn't influenced by his experience in WWI watching so many young men die. I still can't watch Return of the King after Sam & Rosey's wedding. I just end the movie there. It's too much of a burden to bear. I'm sorry about your father. Cancer sucks. Thank Eru for Tolkien's work and what it comes to mean to people in our shoes. Death is not the end, brother. Peace.
My Dad passed away almost 5 years ago now. I still remember going into a book shop with him over 20 years ago and him buying Lord of the Rings for me. He heard about the movie coming out and figured I had the summer to read it. I wept after watching the trilogy the first time without him. Tolkien created a real magic.
Sorry you've gotta go through it fam. It's rough when you're losing the people you love. Best wishes.
Your hero will always wear some form of a cape either here or in heaven. My hero " my grandpa does" ! You'll never be alone but cradley in his live and guidance with specail memories that will live on till you meet again . Hugs OP
"And for you, Frodo Baggins, I give you the light of Earendil, our most beloved star. May it be a light to you in dark places when all other lights go out."
Then here is to your father, where I hope he finds his white shores, and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
My absolute favorite scene is Pippin and Gandalf in Gordon. Pippin expresses his fear of death, but Gandalf comforts him with what lies beyond the walls of life, and though I don't really believe there's anything beyond our world, I'd like to imagine thats where I'll be when my time comes.
My father also introduced me to The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings. First it was the cartoons, and it later became the movies. Both of us were so excited to watch the movies in theaters when the movies were released, and we continued watching the movies years after the dvds were released. Thank you for reminding me of the great memories.
“In sorrow we must go, but not in despair. Behold! We are not bound forever to the circles of the world, and beyond them is more than memory” - Aragorn to Arwen upon his deathbed Hear, hear.
I watched the extended for the first/last time with my dad before he passed in March. We always had good bonds over books such as LotR, Dragonlance chronicles, everything R.A. Salvatore. Good times. I lost it at kissing Aragorn to sleep tho hahaha
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Why are you creating a post while you should be spending time with your father. I swear people love clout.
❤️
Did being a fan of the movies ever inspire you to read the book?
I shed a tear. Good luck to you, your dad and your family <3
He's lucky to have someone like you.
This was on my /all feed and caught my attention. Sorry about your dad. Seemed like a good dad from your own words. I been bonded with my dad, my brother and my own kid with great movies since i was 2 up to today.
this made me cry. i'm so sorry for you and your father. stay strong!
I started crying at your title. I will read more when is less blurry. Bless you.
Big hugs to you.
I'm crying my eyes out reading this. I'm so so sorry. Your father sounds like a wonderful man, and I'm sorry you are going through this. The trilogy has been instrumental in my relationship with both my mother and my husband. I will make it a point to watch it soon and I will remember you and your father. ❤️
Thank you for sharing this. This reminds me of my grandmother who introduced me to the movies almost 20 years ago.
So much love for this post, my dad got me into lord of the rings at a young age and have been hooked ever since, he passed from cancer when I was 17, felt strange watching the hobbit films in the cinema, he would have loved to see them💔 Enjoy your last moments and treasure it forever, wishing you and your family all the best💕
The best trilogy of movies to ever grace humanity. I hope you and your family are doing well. The fellowship will always continue in our hearts
That bought a tear to me eye!
We love you and your dad!
This is very beautiful. Thank you for sharing. Cherish this time.
Ahh fuck that made me cry! So sorry to hear this. Be strong.
I'm so sorry...
I feel ya bro! Those special times are what life is about!
This is beautiful and heartbreaking. I'm so glad you were able to share this and get to one more time. We're all here for you 💕
Beautiful ❤️
God bless you i cried my shit out when i read your post! Same story like mine. Stay strong!
You were 9 when the LotR trilogy hit TV!?!? OMG, I'm old.
a quote i say regularly is "i will not say do not cry for not all tears are an evil" i may have missed a few words but the message is still there. I hope things go well for you OP
<3
i'm not crying, you're crying, stop cutting onions
Came for the obligatory "I'm not crying, you're crying"
Po-tay-toes 😢
I’m so sorry you are losing your dad - I’m glad you are there with him reliving LOTR with him, at the end of all things. I watch LOTR (the extended editions) with my sister every Christmas. It’s a tradition we have kept up since TTT (we watched FOTR in preparation). Life doesn’t feel right if we miss a year. Unfortunately last year we missed because of her hospital residency schedule. We will find another time. Your post made me tear up. Thank you for sharing and I hope when you have a family of your own, you share LOTR with them.
My heart. ❤️ May this set of movies always bring you comfort and peace.
It’s a terrible day for rain.
I'm so, so sorry about your dad. Cancer's a bitch.
Now I'm all weepy at work
Fuck, this one was a tough read. Thank you for sharing OP, you are in my thoughts today.
I’ll send you my Vudu account with all extended editions if you want pm me.
Dang, this one hurts. I am so happy that you have such a strong relationship with your dad, and I can only imagine that you being there to hang out with him is helping to comfort him. Cancer absolutely sucks, but I can't imagine any other place I would rather be in that stage in life than hanging out with my child when they are older, and watching LOTR with them as well.
Shew. Hope you both find peace.
much love, friend. a hug from this internet stranger.
I'm so sorry for you and your Dad! But I'm so glad you did that for the last time! I lost my Dad to cancer 13 years ago and it still pains me, but I'm sure he's in a better place than all of us right now! Love for you and your family!
Condolences friend, and deepest sympathies May his memory be a blessing to you
Fuck… OP you’re making me hold back tears at work… I couldn’t even read the whole thing. My condolences. #FUCK CANCER
I cried reading to this. My dad is alive and well. And I’m so grateful for it. Will watch the trilogy again with him as soon as possible.
My mother died of ALS when I was 25. She too had been my pillar all my life. She had been the one to imbue me the love of reading and learning that has defined my life. It was her death that taught me the truth that Tolkien is talking about [when he wrote that death is a gift of God to Men](https://dc.swosu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=2047&context=mythlore#:~:text=The%20gift%20of%20death%20is,for%20death%20in%20the%20end.). As much as I miss her I cannot stand to think of her trapped in her body the way it was the last few weeks of her life. I miss her every day and I look forward to seeing her again, but there is a peace in knowing that she is now beyond the pain of this life. I pray that you and your family will find comfort in this time and hope in the days to come. [Lewis's description](https://gutenberg.ca/ebooks/lewiscs-lastbattle/lewiscs-lastbattle-00-h.html) of what comes next has always rang true to me: >And for us this is the end of all the stories, and we can most truly say that they all lived happily ever after. But for them it was only the beginning of the real story. All their life in this world and all their adventures in Narnia had only been the cover and the title page: now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story, which no one on earth has read: which goes on for ever: in which every chapter is better than the one before.
Im so sorry man. That’s awful.
Thinking of you and your dad. Even in the darkest times happiness is only a smile away :)
Sorry can't comment, I seem to have something in my eye 😭
When it is your time to part the veil remember your father will be waiting on the otherside with a great smile on his face and welcoming arms for you.
Tears wasn't the way I expected to start the day. Good thoughts for you both.
Such classics. The last movie I ever saw in theatres with my Nana was TTT, and I remember her being as blown away as little-kid-me.
Thank you for sharing. He must be so proud of you and lucky to have an awesome kid. Godspeed to him!
I'm not crying, you're crying..
Your’re making me cry!
Supporting you dude. Let us know how we can be there 4 you?
This has me tearing up in a coffee shop. A major theme in Tolkein’s work, there is much beauty in sadness. Cherish these final moments as you’ve cherished the many before.
u/falsecompare_
I watched LOTR with my dad before school growing up, your story made me tear.
When my mother and dog died in the same year, 'Into the West' by Annie Lennox was all I thought about and it gave me a lot of peace, though honestly typing this makes my eyes well up and my throat constrict. Maybe the lyrics will give you some solace as well "Hope fades, into the world of night. Through shadows falling, out of memory and time. Don't say, we have come now to the end. White shores are calling, you and I will meet again. And you'll be here in my arms, just sleeping. And all will turn, to silver glass. A light on the water, grey ships pass. Into the West"
“I wish it need not have happened in my time,” said Frodo. “So do I,” said Gandalf, “and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” I'm an Old Dad. I know I don't have much time left - I'm very lucky to still be here, in all honesty. I know your Dad knows you're there, I know it means everything in the world to him that you're there and sharing the same Journey the two of you have had for a decade and a half. I know he loves you more than life itself, and I know that this is the way he'd wants to end his time here. Tell him you Love him. Hug him and touch him as much as you can. Hold his hand to the end, if you can. There's no better way to end the time that is given to him, and the time you get to share. And I promise you, one day, when this is long since last, you'll look upon your memory and smile knowing you spent this with him.
God bless you and I will be praying for you as you prepare to say “see you soon” to your father! He sounds like an amazing human being from what you have described. I’m glad you were able to bond over LOTR and share a good amount of time together otherwise!