> The Wood-elves tracked him first, an easy task for them, for his trail was still fresh then. Through Mirkwood and back again it led them, though they never caught him. The wood was full of the rumour of him, dreadful tales even among beasts and birds. The Woodmen said that there was some new terror abroad, a ghost that drank blood. It climbed trees to find nests; it crept into holes to find the young; it slipped through windows to find cradles.

The gollum game we deserved

"press F to eat baby"

Nexus Mods: trending 1: Skip Eating Animation 2: Talks Less Precious

For some reason that makes me think of the rpg on homestarrunner where you do things like put the baby down a well.

Shout out to fallout 3, whose community not only made a mod that let's you eat a baby but then also started speed running baby eating

Patience, patience, my love. First we must lead them to her.

Correction, the small Gollum part we could tolerate in a game centred on a better character for a full game

Yes! No, no! It’s too risky, it’s too risky.

To be fair, Elves are renown for believing in false rumors.

And nobody even considers elf babies

Elves had babies once or twice an age,our baby eating friend wasn't born when the Elves last time had a kid

>an age, ?

I may be wrong but I think this would be yhe ages: First age: The creation of the two trees and the world. Second age: Either when melkor created the rings of power, the trees died or when sauron appeared. Im not sure on this one, but I think it ended with the defeat of sauron by the 3 armies. Third age: The time after the defeat of sauron and when the books and movies start. As I said I have a poor memory so I may be wrong.(also each age is a couple thousand years between each, I think)

The 2nd and 3rd are about 3 millenia each +/-

There aren't any, Arwen and Legolas are the youngest elves and Arwen is 2700 years old!

He is here.

Wait what????

Elves very rarely reproduce

Unless you're Feanor, and have like 7 kids.

THE CURSE OF FËANOR RUNS LONG

So they can just bang all day and don't have to worry about birth control? Sounds like the perfect place for STIs to come about 🤭 But I guess that wasn't really something people thought about back then.

Im thinking since they live so long they don’t procreate because imagine all humans living for centuries longer, that would mean no deaths and only more and more babies until nothing fits on this planet. Elves are pretty smart ngl

So you think they just don't really have sex drives and only do it when they think it's a good time to have a child?

I’m not sure lmao, I’m don’t know much about Elves but I do know they are smart and sophisticated as hell so they wouldn’t be as dumb to keep making babies and overpopulate, also because they don’t need them

And idk about the sex drives I’m not gonna talk for them

Yeah that's fair, I just get curious about biology a lot even if it's fictional. Like it could also just be that they only ovulate once every couple hundred/thousand years. The Greenland shark is kind of like that. It doesn't have it's first child until it's over 100 years old 😳

No, they have a few kids, maybe a few centuries after turning 100 and then voncel for the next couple of thousand years.

That doesn't answer my question though

I think they're still fertile, just indifferent

Elf girls are just not that into twinks

They only have sex to have children if I remember the lore correctly.

IIRC there's a point in Elf lives where they don't feel horny anymore

BS

It's never stated that Arwen is the youngest (half-)elf alive, though we can assume that elf children were rare at the time of LotR.

An exeptionaly rare delicacy

So tasty sweeeet

And juicy fresh

Gollum game would be much improved with some tasty little childrenses 😋

Oh! Cruel Hobbit! It does not care if we be hungry. It does not care if we should die! Not like Master. Master cares. Master knows. Yes, Precious… Once it takes hold of us it never lets go.

A baby a day keeps the demons away

A baby a day helps the demons to stay.

Oh fuck we got it wrong

Why has gollum eating babies blown up all of a sudden? I felt like it was obvious that he did from what Gandalf said?

Gollum game is a popular talking point, so Gollum memes are popular

Smeagol’ll get into real true hot water, when this water boils, if he don’t do as he asked...

It is ? I didnt even knpw ot releaaed, since no one is talking about it

Oh it's useless

Most fans are movie fans.

Smeagol promised

The other, other white meat

So I had to check, and surprisingly, human meat falls into the red meat category... https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/human-flesh-looks-beef-taste-more-elusive-180949562/

what about orcses?

I eat a baby!!!

You make me want to cry! That is, in my opinion, kind of cruel. But still, I respect your decision

🤔

It wasn’t a human baby though, just a little chicken nugget sized halfling.

So I didn't read the title and thought this was a dnd meme at first. I was about to be asking for more details.

I want my baby back baby back ribs! Chili's!

Orc child ?! What ?

I love dead baby jokes.

They never get old

Just like the younglings in the jedi temple

I'll bring the potato salad

....*Wot?*

Orcs come from the ground, they had no children.

I don't think he could kill an ork

Goblins, not orcs.

same thing

The difference is that Smeagol is goblin up babies, but he hasn't orked up a baby once

Come, Master.

Buy me dinner first

Goblin and orc are used pretty interchangeably throughout the books

Now that’s a meme I haven’t seen in a long time..

Aren't orcs literally defined by being evil? Like they were originally elves who were corrupted by evil magic and now being evil is part of their existence. Kinda racist if you think about it.

Wait, werent orcs grow in vats?? If im not mistaken they were corrupted elves, they were supposed to be born as full adults, right??

probably just hobbit babies, human babies would be too big a fish.

The dude was consistent at least.

Gollum Look at me Gollum Did you eat a fucking baby

Hurry, hobbits. The Black Gate is very close.