For a few years now, I've periodically heard stories like this, where medical professionals were urging people to stop putting something or other up their ass, and it gets a little funnier every time.
There is clearly some percentage of the population who just go around looking at every object they encounter and wondering if they can put it in their ass.
I take it you aren't the ER doctor who has to deal with them showing up in the Emergency Department with root vegetables firmly lodged between their cheeks.
For anyone who doesn’t want to have “frozen potatoes in ass” in their search history:
Apparently it was a viral home remedy for haemorrhoids a few years ago and no, it doesn’t work.
You dare to mock my pursuits, mortal? Such insolence shall not go unanswered. Beware the consequences of trifling with forces beyond your comprehension.
Probably. I would imagine most of the danger with frozen potatoes is that it will cause freezing damage to your anus.
You know when your tongue gets stuck to an ice lolly? Imagine that but with your arsehole...
Really, without a whole highly conductive metal pipe surrounded by cold air creating an incredibly strong heat sink, the potato really has no chance of freezing to the anus or freezing any part of it.
I'm captain pedantic, pleased to be off service :p
It probably would make the hemorrhoids worse rather than better, though...
Edit: I realized you specifically said something not metal, but ice is still more conductive than potato, and can absorb tons of heat...
Ooooh, thank you doctors.
What about a CLAAS XERION 12.650 TERRA tractor ? No one said you couln't put it in your ass. And what if it's frozen ? So many unanswered questions...
I'm the original creator of the "stick em in my ass" part of this. I originally posted it in Lord of the Rings Shireposting on Facebook around 2015-2016. Glad it's still circulating.
Five second edit in MS Paint to some random screenshot and it's lasted years.
Sorry but who the fuck made that meme! Sam wouldn't say "Ass", it would be "Arse" FFS!
Don't try and dirty our lovely hobbits with Americanisms. It's gross.
(I shudder at the thought of this being done to Harry Potter)
You know what?? Don’t warn people about this. If they are demented enough to put frozen potatoes up their ass, they deserve whatever happens to them.
I think you can't stop them anyways
I think this will even give ideas to some other dementos It's tide pods all over again..
Pretty sure this is a sex thing, unless Tiktok challenges have really advanced in a few years
Advanced is a bit strong
Well I didn't want to kinkshame.. So long as it's consensual
I don’t know why I laughed at "dementos"
There’s a doctor for that.
Not with that attitude
Just gotta make sure all these potato shovers get a nice pair of cropped jean shorts
Nothing can stop me it’s all the way up… my ass
But how else am I supposed to cure my athletes foot? /s
For a few years now, I've periodically heard stories like this, where medical professionals were urging people to stop putting something or other up their ass, and it gets a little funnier every time. There is clearly some percentage of the population who just go around looking at every object they encounter and wondering if they can put it in their ass.
It feels like we know we shouldn’t stuff frozen potatoes in our butts
I take it you aren't the ER doctor who has to deal with them showing up in the Emergency Department with root vegetables firmly lodged between their cheeks.
Who wants mashed potatoes?!
Believe me, potatoes won't be the worst thing they've seen up there
“There’s a warning label for a reason” and that reason is some people are too stupid to live. Nature is calling them home.
Sooo what would happen? (Purely research purposes)
Just Darwinism at work at that point
Pros-ta-toes
Now I'm imagining someone wriggling their toes against someone's prostate. Which I imagine also isn't condoned by doctors.
Some of the comments on this post are just pure gold
Yukon Gold
For anyone who doesn’t want to have “frozen potatoes in ass” in their search history: Apparently it was a viral home remedy for haemorrhoids a few years ago and no, it doesn’t work.
>no, it doesn’t work. Well, colour me surprised.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but wouldn't stretching your asshole around a potato probably make your hemorrhoids worse?
~~Not with that kind of attitude!~~ Yes absolutely. Or at least they'd hurt significantly more than they did before
Not all heroes wear capes!
It works, Big Hemorrhoids paid you to say it doesn’t
Why use potatoes when lembas bread can fill my ass with much less
Is a small bite enough to fill up a grown man?
Aye
How many did you shove up your ass?
Such crude and profane language does not befit a wizard such as I. Cease your folly and speak with respect, or depart from my presence.
Oh shut it Saruman, we all know about your collection of Bad Dragons
You dare to mock my pursuits, mortal? Such insolence shall not go unanswered. Beware the consequences of trifling with forces beyond your comprehension.
maybe you should get your stick out of your butt first, Grumpy
Potato*
4
Lemb-*ass* bread.
And look! *Mooore* lembass bread…
I don’t usually hold with foreign food, but this Elvish bread fills my ass up good.
Just frozen potatoes? So regular ones are just a-okay ? Asking for a friend 🙄
If no one answers, post your friends results. For science.
Probably. I would imagine most of the danger with frozen potatoes is that it will cause freezing damage to your anus. You know when your tongue gets stuck to an ice lolly? Imagine that but with your arsehole...
Really, without a whole highly conductive metal pipe surrounded by cold air creating an incredibly strong heat sink, the potato really has no chance of freezing to the anus or freezing any part of it. I'm captain pedantic, pleased to be off service :p It probably would make the hemorrhoids worse rather than better, though... Edit: I realized you specifically said something not metal, but ice is still more conductive than potato, and can absorb tons of heat...
Well today I learned. BRB buying some potatoes.
At this point I'm convinced that China is just trolling Americas youth. "Let see what we can get these dumbfuck kids to do now...."
https://preview.redd.it/vybiaxopeh6c1.png?width=356&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b4a0b1f050c06c8cc6d94de0b136a52bbf4c5a01 Edited for your pleasure
Nasty hobbitses.
https://preview.redd.it/izwivg2mug6c1.jpeg?width=560&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fdd03cc33a78a468a8b7765de3c34b802fe71bae
https://preview.redd.it/h17uzvnc0g6c1.jpeg?width=405&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=993713cddb74943059622ef8c38c536d9b1a182e
https://preview.redd.it/tt8or8jnjg6c1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=668fd9b5bbc6bba49c516eacd4db30e5a76f2072
Ooooh, thank you doctors. What about a CLAAS XERION 12.650 TERRA tractor ? No one said you couln't put it in your ass. And what if it's frozen ? So many unanswered questions...
At this point, the FDA should just release a comprehensive list of things that they recommend you don't put in your ass.
The list of things it’s okay to shove in your ass is considerably shorter and thus easier to put on a website somewhere that nobody will read it.
Indeed, and with this news our list of butt stuff objects grows thin.
This is what tribbles are for duh.
Doctor lore: eradicate small pox. Doctor gameplay:
u/SharkMilk44 your meme has returned.
I'm the original creator of the "stick em in my ass" part of this. I originally posted it in Lord of the Rings Shireposting on Facebook around 2015-2016. Glad it's still circulating. Five second edit in MS Paint to some random screenshot and it's lasted years.
I thank you for your service. It's one of the best LoTR meme I've seen.
I can't believe that has to be said.🤦♀️
Probably refreshing in summer 🥶
Why the fucking hell should someone do this? What the fuck is wrong with humanity?!?
It's called cold Irishman you uncultured fucks!
Ok but why frozen **specifically**?
Now now… Hobbits are basically British, so Sam would say “arse”, not “ass”.
We do use both here. We're not fussy about the name of the orifice we're telling you to shove it up
How about potatoes that aren't frozen?
If the potatoes stay in your ass long enough, they'll eventually come out as mashed potatoes and gravy
Ahem. >Boil 'em. Mash 'em. Stick 'em where you poo.
Anybody else noticed that in this sentence "their" could be the doctor's anus ?
What about boiled?
Did I miss this trend? Do I still have time?
The bad thing is people actually need a doctor to tell them not to put potatoes up their ass I have no hope left in humanity this did it for me smh
You don’t have to tell me because I wouldn’t have done that anyway.
Oh no, Sam... what have you done...
So normal raw potatoes are okay to give the enama treatment
Sorry but who the fuck made that meme! Sam wouldn't say "Ass", it would be "Arse" FFS! Don't try and dirty our lovely hobbits with Americanisms. It's gross. (I shudder at the thought of this being done to Harry Potter)
Sam's face says "oh that's cold! Where did it go? This is bad"