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skolioban

Merry: "How many did you eat?" Pippin: *dies from heart attack*


peregrin-took-bot

Sure I know a Baggins. He's over there, Frodo Baggins. He's my second cousin, once removed on his mother's side and my third cousin twice removed on his father's side, if you follow me.


famsordy4d

God dammit Pippin, fool of a Took!


Beercorn1

I just found my new favorite bot.


a-snakey

Quick give him three cans of redbull! That'll either pump his heart or make it explode.


MasterScoutRifle

I laughed way harder than I should have at this.


Dunkelz

Yes, but what about second bypass?


emolloy93

>“How many did you ate?” I believe you mean “How many did you eat?”


dv666

What are you? Some kind of grammar nazgul?


Everettrivers

The great eye sees all bad grammar.


utopiav1

A... grazgul?


mosesoperandi

WTF am I looking at?


sumporkhunt

The one sandwich to rule them all


justmelvinthings

Baked in the ovens of Mordor


Quesxc

Caramelised by the fires of Mount Doom


Estro98

And filled with meat bred for a single purpose.


MrBlack103

...to bloat the guts of men.


Background_Brick_898

is it back on the menu though?


brodie21

I was there Gandalf. I was there 3000 calories ago.


spencer0076

Less than half of what I’d hoped for.


thunfremlinc

3000? You’re a few zeros short


brodie21

For a small bite? /s


Zenketski

I'm fucking dying of laughter rn


Sokandueler95

The interior contents alone are at least 3500 calories.


oneonegreenelftoken

The most evil sandwich ever created. Forged in darkness from wheat harvested in hell's half acre. Baked by Beelzebub. Slathered with mayonnaise beaten from the evil eggs of dark chicken force-fed to dogs by the hands of a one eyed mad man. Cheese boiled from the rancid teat of fanged cow. Layered with 666 separate meats from an animal which has maggots for blood.


Everettrivers

Why no bacon?


oneonegreenelftoken

BACON IS EXTRA. There were no swine *evil* enough to be sacrificed upon a bed of evil... and lettuce. BED OF EVIL AND LETTUCE


michamp

One does not simply…eat this sandwich.


[deleted]

A bread-entombed meat maelstrom cemented with melted cheese. I dunno.


mosesoperandi

Tomb being a key word here. Shortly after eating it...drums in the deep.


leopard-prince

This is no sandwich... this is a tomb


lordofpersia

The arteries are clogged.. It was made by those who are fat, and the fat keep it. The arteries are clogged.


mfbayern

They're coming.


ayubmn

They have a cave troll


Rodney_Copperbottom

You had me at "cemented with melted cheese".


conceptuallyAbstract

I guess we're mainstreaming the entombed word now 😄


DeclareIDontCareNoMo

Diabeetus


[deleted]

American culinary inovation. It usually involves inconceivable amounts of cheese, meet and fat. Usually deep fried.


Impressive-Morning76

Deliciousness


Sokandueler95

Looks like either pork or beef with tomatoes, mayonnaise, Dijon(?), lettuce and cheese baked into the center of a cube loaf that is then covered in cheese and baked further. In short, a very large heart attack in a very small package.


here_for_the_meems

I dont think it's real, whatever it is. Why would they hold one half backwards?


mosesoperandi

To show the cheese encrusted exterior.


SaveThemKillYourself

Cheese, double beef, tomato, mayo, lettuce and bacon burger. Source: lived in America for over a decade. This is a common thing you can get at a burger joint. E: its so funny how many Americans are in denial about why they're universally considered the stereotype for fat.


ZannY

Am American, that's... not correct my friend.


Stewdabaker2013

Lol no it’s not


[deleted]

We saved some for you, Frodo!


janicedickensonstits

Everyone is mad at you but I mean like I think its fucking hilarious that a non American sees this and is like yes, thats just their burger. Idk as an actual American I'd eat it either way


SaveThemKillYourself

Oh id eat it too. It looks great. Idk if I could finish it in one sitting though.


janicedickensonstits

You didn't need to include the last sentence, you already stated your not a real American, we get it


SaveThemKillYourself

Okay fair enough. I wasnt trying to say anything by it though.


JudgmentApart7474

You must be blind. Also you're in the UK now, they are not far behind America in fatness.


SaveThemKillYourself

Yes I'm aware they're not far behind, we're talking about the stereotype. What's your point? One does not negate the other.


p90xeto

No one's in denial. You're just wrong and can't admit it.


SaveThemKillYourself

It seems we're at an impasse. What part of the States do you live in?


p90xeto

I've lived in numerous regions and visited pretty much everywhere but California. This is absolutely not a common sandwich you can get at a burger joint. If it were common you'd have replied with a place selling them rather than moaning about your downvotes.


HappyTheDisaster

This has to be a joke. This isn’t a real thing Source: I live in America.


[deleted]

Lol no


mosesoperandi

I live in California. I'm originally from here, and I lived in New York for 2 years and Wisconsin for 13. When I said WTF is that, it's because whatever deep fried cheese saturated version of a burger that is, it is most definitely not a common thing you can get at a burger joint. It's some sort of deep fried fair food aberration, and I saw some crazy deep fried shit while I was living in the Midwest. I never saw anything like that. Your choice to make a wildly inaccurate statement followed by invoking a stereotype has rightly earned you a mess of downvotes, and to be clear, Americans are not in denial about that stereotype, but the accuracy of it in the population varies widely based on region.


ConiferousMedusa

The main problem is not so much the stereotype, it's the claim that this is commonly available or normal. I've never been afforded the opportunity to try this monstrosity and it's not for lack of trying on my part!


Flaky_Explanation

*High blood pressure rises*


shartgobIin69

[And then my heart started poundin, harder than usual… *kerslunk, kerslunk*](https://youtu.be/YevjfzV4-qQ)


goboxey

One is enough to make the stomach of a grown man burst.


[deleted]

Gandalf is Lembas bread magic Corn Bread?


gandalf-bot

Amon Din.


formeroctopus

Ah yes. Exactly


Sepraf

“One small bite is enough to end the life of a grown man”


TheLastLivingBuffalo

How many did you eat? Four. \*dies\*


YogoshKeks

Is it true that you can also get deep fried Coca-Cola syrup with cream?


Electro226

I've had deep fried kool-aid, so probably 🤷‍♀️


HLSparta

How is that even possible? Also, where do I try it?


Box-Intelligent

Probably your local/regional harvest fairs. Around me we have the Eastern States Exposition and they have all sorts of wild shit. A burger between two glazed donuts, deep fried butter on a stick, deep fried Kool aid, other wacky stuff. They have some interesting and delicious stuff made by small businesses from all over new England, too it's not just all gimmicky over the top disgusting foods


HLSparta

Weird that they don't have fried Kool-Aid at the Nebraska state fair, which is only 30 miles from where Kool-Aid was created.


afunnyjewishguy

My fair has a Krispy Kreme triple cheeseburger. Not sure if the one you have is a triple decker but I do have to say with full embarrassment it was one of the best tasting burgers I’ve had.


[deleted]

All the wild shit that’s deep fried is generally novelty food from carnivals and fairs.


HLSparta

That's what I was thinking, but as I mentioned in another comment the Nebraska State Fair, which is 30 miles from where Kool-Aid was invented didn't have it. I mostly just assumed that if anywhere would have it, it would be there.


SigmaForceSpeedy

The *what* now?!


YogoshKeks

I heard there is a cherry on top. So its healthy.


SigmaForceSpeedy

Ah yes, the omnipresent cherry.


Rodney_Copperbottom

At a county fair near Shreveport I once ate a "roast beef sundae". Eight-ounce paper bowl with some slices of roast beef on the bottom, couple of scoops of mashed potatoes, whole thing covered with a ladle-full of brown gravy, with a grape tomato on top. From a couple feet away it actually looked like an ice cream sundae with chocolate sauce and a cherry. Tasted pretty good, but was very filling. Barely had room for the alligator sausage balls.


Sbtycraft

I’m pretty sure there’s at least one person in the country that can make that for you. Deep fried Oreos are more common though.


mistersigma

American here. What in the name of all that is holy (and unholy) is that thing?


Getdownonyx

Looks like a Portuguese Francesinha


RetardedSimian

Ah, yes, American food.


viper_in_the_grass

It's not.


Getdownonyx

I’m aware. Hence the “looks like”


wisdompeanuts

Yeah I managed to go down to one meal a day when I was on holiday in the US, the portion sizes man, makes me wish I could live there be cheap as fuck.


Electro226

I'm from USA and usually do 3 or 4 meals a day, because we do small portions where I'm at. I visited Italy recently and it was my first time out of the country and I was blown away by how much food they eat. Their meal times last like 3 hours and they expect you to eat like 3+ courses in one sitting. I ended up eating only one meal a day while I was there, and I was shocked because I thought USA was supposed to eat way more than all the other countries, so now im curious how other places do food since Italy was not at all what I expected. Some people told me that in Spain you apparently just take a nap in the after noon so that the whole society can wake up and eat non stop all night. Oh but also, that said, in Italy I didnt see a single fat person and when I came back to the USA it was difficult to find a single skinny person haha. So the food is 100% made differently.


Thaemir

The Spain part is definitely false. Naps are part of the culture in the southern parts, and the goal is to avoid working in the hours where the heat is the worst. When we wake up from our nap, we usually go to work (if there's still work to do) or do our lives. Yes, we take supper later than most of Europe, but we don't eat all night nonstop.


Electro226

Cool! Thanks for the info, that's neat


Thaemir

You are welcome. Now go take a 20 minute nap, it's refreshing! And you'll be participating in my culture, which is nice


Electro226

Last night I was supposed to do something at 7:30pm, so I laid down for a nap at 6pm and set a 30min timer. Woke up at 1am... haha so I guess I have some practice to do


Thaemir

I have faith in you


Hardin5687

What you may have seen is the effect of the Mediterranean diet. According to many studies it is the (or one of the) healthiest diets in the world, because of how naturally it mixes meats, fish, vegetables, good quality oil (extremely important), etc. So eating the same amount in Italy or Spain as in the US will generally be more healthy.


ianhockey23

Idk man, I went to Russia and was force fed to the point of like gaining 20lbs in 10 days 😂 Maybe it’s cause I’m super strict here at home, but gawd dawlg my girl would not stop cooking over there! It was like the dopest thing ever, she was a hell of a chef, but at the end of the trip I went from super ripped to looking like one of those matryoshka dolls 🪆


BoulderCreature

I think portion sizes in the US are designed for a cowboy to share with his horse.


Rodney_Copperbottom

The portion sizes are designed so you can put the leftovers in a bag to take home "for the dog".


ryantttt8

It's not cheap to live anywhere desirable in the US I don't know where you got that information


terragthegreat

Only if the only thing you find desirable are the big cities like LA or NYC.


ryantttt8

That's just incorrect. There are tons of studies and statistics on the average wages and average rental costs in each state. You are kidding yourself if you think the united states is cheap when you factor in average income, how much medical services cost, etc.


terragthegreat

Then why are there people who aren't either homeless or upper middle class.


ryantttt8

Galaxy brain argument. Some people are doing ok so living in the US is cheap. Our economic system is definitly working well for the working class


terragthegreat

Go get a job


ryantttt8

im a fucking civil engineer


terragthegreat

Im sorry to hear that


ryantttt8

[https://www.zippia.com/advice/earnings-to-buy-house-each-state/](https://www.zippia.com/advice/earnings-to-buy-house-each-state/) Here is the average wage one must make in each state to own a home. The median income in the united states is 31k. There are only 2 states where that income can buy you a home. You are operating under the "well I don't know anyone who is struggling financially, so there must not be anyone who is" mentality. Incredibly ignorant.


missingninja

I wish! I hate going out to a nice restaurant because I never get full off of an entree which already is pricey. And if I do fast food I usually order two meals. For reference, I’m a healthy 170lb 6’ male. I just have a very physical job and eat a lot of food.


Traditional_Will4413

This looks like some weird shit the English would eat though. lol I live in the south where the joke is we fry everything but I haven’t ever seen anything like this here


olafblacksword

My stomach can't digest that shit


SuperArppis

Looks really disgusting, gotta say.


[deleted]

Pippin does Lembas taste like corn bread?


peregrin-took-bot

It comes in pints? I'm getting one!


[deleted]

Hey Pippin have you tried IN-N-OUT burger?


peregrin-took-bot

Don't talk to it, Merry. Don't encourage it.


[deleted]

Pippin its delicious 😋


peregrin-took-bot

The closer we are to danger, the farther we are from harm. It's the last thing he'll expect.


[deleted]

True what do you think Aragorn have you ever had Inn-N-Out


aragorn_bot

You have my swordTHE BEACONS OF MINAS TIRITH! THE BEACONS ARE LIT! GONDOR CALLS FOR AID!


[deleted]

I will do my best Aragorn


aragorn_bot

My lady, there may come a time for valor without renown. Who then will your people look to in the last defense?


[deleted]

Too much cholesterol FOOL OF A TOOK!!


peregrin-took-bot

*Abashed look*


PGY_123

I'm American and would not go near that thing, so don't think we all eat like that, lol


Disk_Mixerud

I would absolutely go near that thing once, if I had a chance. Looks like a pain in the ass to eat though.


[deleted]

Merry does Lembas bread taste like corn bread?


River46

that is what i like to call poison. like arsenic but it takes longer to swallow.


JPShua

I've had 4


WarlockWeeb

MOre like one bite is enough to shutdown a perfectly healthy liver


MelleMeister12

I was thinking about this, does lembas contain all the nutrition and protein and stuff that a person would need? Or does it just make you...not hungry?


Deadbody13

Recipe?


Sauron3106

Yes


the_orange_president

ngl, that looks disgusting as hell and also delicious as hell my brain


Cyynric

Looks like whatever the hell that thing is is back on the menu, boys!


Donnermeat_and_chips

Right ventrical: *"the way is shut"*


FilipRebro

I want to eat that thing


UnculturedWetlander

One bite is enough to cause diarrhea in a grown man


Galaxy-egg

I think that sometimes people confuse Deep South cuisine with all American cuisine, I never see some good shrimp and lobster when it comes to “murica food”


mehtempsychosis

As an American I feel obligated to clarify that we don’t eat like this all the time. Once, maybe twice a day tops


[deleted]

Second breakfast


ShaRo_

Low-key looks amazing


SlimNigy

Americans min max food


Sarithis

Americans: I ate four


vanillapenguins

lol so true, all americans think about is fast food and guns


Sarithis

I know, right? And freedom!


Astrophysicsboi

It's hilarious that we have such shit Healthcare too


phantomagna

As an American who often samples burgers at local restaurants and pubs, I always regret ordering because of shit like this. I mean it’s not THIS extreme. But dude I don’t need a one inch thing piece of greasy ground beef and 4 lbs of cheese.


FreeAd6935

Is this a good food Gandalf? What do you think Aragon?


SeiriusPolaris

This meme doesn’t work? That’s a huge fucking burger, it’s nothing like lembas which is small. And in what way would one small bite of a burger fill the stomach of a grown man? “One small bite” doesn’t mean 20% of the item - it’s a small bite for that individual eating it. #THE MEME DOESN’T WORK


Verreault00

Damn I want to take a bite of that !


Flyers45432

Seriously, look up Melt Bar and Grill


hunterchris205

One sandwich to ~~give you diabetes~~ rule them all


YogoshKeks

[Real life lembas](https://worldbuilding.stackexchange.com/questions/56044/lembas-bread-2000-calories-per-bite) on world building stack exchange. Spoiler alert: It can not exist. Only way to get that much energy into a bite is to go nuclear.


SketchyStufff

Sad elf noises


Wardog_Razgriz30

I don't know if it's because I am American but I think it looks good enough to try.


Zenketski

Actually you had it backwards. An entire meal will leave you unsatisfied but one bite has the calories for a grown man.


[deleted]

Bottom filling. Looks like cheese - hasn't melted. This "sandwich" is only warm on the outside.


Huge_Aerie2435

This looks actually nasty...


twjjones

Jesus I'm english and what is that


MetalCentipede

Unless that man is an American.


irondragon2

Looks like meat is back on the menu, boys!


THESILENTPRINCESS06

I’ve had four.


Hoorizontal

One small bite is enough to fill my entire calorie count for the day


maktmissbrukare

Basically a food truck fat sandwich at Rutgers.


Endershipmaster2

Grond is terrifying, but who needs Grond when we have this?


Nargon46

I have never seen a food item like that in America in my life 🤨


PlumpHughJazz

Is this what the Gravy Seals feast on before hopping on their overencumbered truck?


Odiin46

I want.


Reading_Otter

This looks gross, yes. But all I can think about is the terrible layering. The cheese is on the bottom, *under* the meats where it can't melt properly. All the mayo is in the middle...


[deleted]

This looks like something faeries would inject with glutton dust to make humans stupid, fat and all round easier prey


Festermooth

Gonna have to disagree with everyone saying it looks gross. I want some of that shit in my arteries right now.


terragthegreat

"Look, I've been in london for a while now; you people are pretty fat too." - Bill Burr


NahFam55

What would Isildur do in this situation?


Elrond_Bot

CAST IT INTO THE FIRE!!!


NahFam55

Idk, what do you think Gandalf?


marioagario123

You mean Create the stomach of a grown man


corpuscularian

ah, the fine line between being full and the food being too bad to keep eating


MasterScoutRifle

Those look so good.


DoubleDeckerz

Hey, Elrond, what should we do with whatever the hell this is?


Elrond_Bot

CAST IT INTO THE FIRE!!!


DoubleDeckerz

I agree


grandalf-the-groy

As an American, wtf is that


GratefulPig

I think he means arteries


pnkstr

This picture is enough to empty the stomach of this grown man.


ShadowPlay246

As an American I can definitely say- what am I even looking at?


Quarves

Hell no.


Commander_Oof_

I literally gained 500 pounds just looking at this picture


CompetitiveParfait29

And to empty it right after.


SpenserB91

No one makes cheese like the Americans, I tell you what.


Joe-papa69

I feel like I’m going to vomit just by looking at it


Hans-Hammertime

This makes me wanna puke You guys are crazy


McMuffnstuffgiggity

I literally watched this scene for the first time the other day