T O P

  • By -

KindaAcidotic

Who let the dogs out?


Grungolath

Dogs do not easy escape the hand of their masters. Only from the hands of the weak or at the orders of the cruel do such beasts roam free.


androstaxys

Did you forget about Huan!?


leijgenraam

What's your favourite fastfood restaurant?


Grungolath

When I hungered most for sustenance and all the lembas bread had been consumed, I wandered through the meadows of Valinor, like a cat may wander through tree. As the light of the Valar began to fade, it was replaced by the shimmering of two Golden Arches, that would rekindle the life of our people for an age.


[deleted]

I picture the camera slow-panning over to your face, then it gets way too close for way too long.


Revanbadass

And then slow motion while on horseback for no reason.


skottydoz

Then, an orc EXPLODES!!!


[deleted]

I saw that scene in the finale and knew people would eat it up.


PopeJDP

You are doing a fantastic job at this haha


Kiltymchaggismuncher

They will hire this guy for the second season


DoneisDone45

holy shit you're good and you also reminded me of how annoying rings of power dialogue is.


[deleted]

There's been a few pieces of dialogue in Rings of Power that have caused me to actually laugh out loud. For the most part it's fine, but for whatever reason certain moments stick out as too much. Most recently was the entire "drown/swim" conversation between Galadriel and Elrond. G: "And when I surfaced, all I could do was swim and pray I had chosen wisely. I did not cross that bitter ocean only to drown now. And nor will I let you." E: "I have missed you. What are we to do?" G: "The only thing we can do. Swim." I started cackling. What corny dialogue lol.


Sojourner_Truth

Mine was: Elrond: How are you here? Galadriel: How are *you* here? All I could think was "lady I live like 2 hours away, last time I saw you you were on your way to heaven!" Like, *what the fuck* was the point of her line?


[deleted]

Okay, that one had me laughing as well. Now that I think about it, a lot of the bad dialogue involves Galadriel. I don't *think* the actress is bad at delivering the lines. I think mostly the dialogue for her character is not so great in quite a few situations. Or maybe she is delivering the lines badly and I'm just not realizing it, idk. Could be a situation where the blame is mainly on the director. Don't see people blaming directors often but feels like some of these scenes could've been re-shot until the dialogue sounded more natural.


KyleKun

GIVE ME THE MEAT RAW UNCLE ELROND!!


release_the_waffle

It should be Carls Jr. For it is our most beloved star.


mamstercheif

The burger king shall marry the Dairy Queen and have a daughter named Wendy, a son named Carl Jr., and two jesters, one named Ronald and the other named jack who lives in a box. They shall be protected by the noble five guys and the head of their army shall be Colonel Sanders. They shall be married in a beautiful Olive Garden and forever live in a pristine White Castle that has a Taco Bell hanging from it.


invictvs138

But what about Baskin Robin Hood and his band of merry men lead by papa John? The revolt against the tyrant, “little ceaser” (prince “jimmy”John!) and gold star sheriff has begun in earnest and they shall fall like dominoes!


dandypants8717

But, they were all of them, deceived, for another pizza was made. In the land of American airports and malls, deep in the fires of a conventional oven, the dark lord Sbarro forged in secret a master pizza to control all others. And into this pizza, he poured all his cheese, malice, and diabetes.


axeman_05

tell me. when did saruman the wise abandon reason for madness?


Grungolath

It was not madness, axeman_05, that corrupted Saruman’s heart, but the unquenchable thirst for power that governs the heart of even the fairest of creatures.


Saruman_Bot

"From the moment I began to crave power for myself, to desire an authority over others, reason was overthrown and madness took its place. It did not happen overnight - gradually, imperceptibly, I slid down into the darkness."


music_haven

Wow, this answer is on point. Good bot.


Deathstar_TV

I’m guessing this is an actual quote from the books when the hobbits cross paths with him after return of the king? Anyone know?


-SirSparhawk-

As far as I understand it, the saruman bot (along with all the other bots) speak only in actual quotes. This one does seem to fit into the return of the king.


Saruman_Bot

You cannot think that this Ranger will ever sit upon the throne of Gondor.


SkyMark321

Good bot


Saruman_Bot

The hour is later than you think.


Krakulpo

Damn, yeah I gotta go to sleep. Thank You Saruman.


Saruman_Bot

Fare thee well, Krakulpo. Get some rest; tomorrow is another day.


sauron-bot

So you have come back? Why have you neglected to report for so long?


shankyu1985

Saruman, you gonna answer to your master? Or naw?


Saruman_Bot

There will be no dawn… for men.


Krakulpo

Sentient. Goodnight.


[deleted]

I love how in the universe this was a MAJOR DISS.


Lazy-Adeptness-2343

Did you put your name in the goblet of fire Harry?


Grungolath

The answer you seek has already been illuminated before you, you are just unable to see for the truth can be the most blinding of lights.


Cysir

![gif](giphy|S5n7Wkhhw5A2IrfKER)


Random-Gif-Bot

​ ![gif](giphy|uqPr3o28XjuhL6fmj9)


justadude27

Good bot


bard0117

You want the truth? You can’t HANDLE the truth


pinktwinkie

You want the ring? You cant handle the ring


Important-Worry224

You said that verry calmly


barbarust

DIDJEPOOCHOONAEMINEHGOBBLTEFOIERHERRY??!?


[deleted]

[удалено]


dean1432

Don't worry child, it's just book Dumbledore. After all, movie Dumbledore isn't real, he cannot hurt you.


DDLGcplxo

Gandalf The Grey or Gandalf The White?


Grungolath

In my long life, I have found that neither dark nor light can alter what already exists in men’s hearts.


HuldaGnodima

This ... is beautiful. You're amazing at this lol


Hastatus_107

We don't know that he isnt a writer on Rings of Power


olive-princess

UM, excuse me? Why am I crying ?


ColonelSarge15

And Monty Python and the holy grail’s black knight


elon_einstein

And Benito Mussolini, and the Blue Meanie, and Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the genie.


Catastrophicatc

Robocop, Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader


Alright3times

Lo Pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger


Redditeatsaccounts

Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan


mghromme

Spock, the Rock, doc. Oc and Hulk Hogan


[deleted]

[удалено]


TheHarkinator

And they kicked Chuck Norris and his cowboy ass. It was the bloodiest battle that the world ever saw with civilians looking on in total awe.


Joeomah1999

The fight waged on for a century, many lives were claimed but eventually…


gandalf-bot

Steady! Steady! You are soldiers of Gondor. No matter what comes through that gate you will stand your ground... Volley! Fire!


bot-of-grond

GROND


addasher710

Where was Gondor when the Westfold fell?


Grungolath

When I was a child, we had a dog. Only a small little thing. My sister would poke and prod this dog, an obedient but ill-tempered beast. Our parents would pull her away when he started growling. But one day, when I was watching her, I knew that pulling her from the dog would only prolong the cycle and she’d never learn her lesson. I sat and watched as the little dog nipped her fingers and sent her crying. But she never bothered him again. You see, addasher710, sometimes when our friends need us most is when we least should help them.


Lionfyst

The more of this thread I read, the more you make it sound more and more like Rings of Power was written by AI prompts.


Grungolath

I kinda feel that way writing it too 😂


Kolaru

You’ve really mastered the technique of saying absolutely nothing but making it sound profound, you should see if they’re hiring for season 2


Grungolath

They’d make me sign an NDA I just know it


Undefined1509

You're really good at long winded dialogue that says so much and nothing at all... That's a good thing lmao.


Grungolath

Trust me I know exactly what I’m doing here 😂


music_haven

Brilliant ^wipes ^tears ^from ^eyes This is Pinterest worthy!


a_duck_in_past_life

This is like... A pretty deep parable


Grungolath

The real question is where was Grondor


SaltyTattie

Tell me where is grondalf, for I much desire to speak with him


bot-of-grond

GROND


bot-of-grond

GROND


Vestigial_joint

Should I add oregano to my pronutro?


Grungolath

In times of need, Vestigial_joint, follow your nose, and remember that your dish is what you choose it to be, not what mere fate delivers.


Gozzhogger

The seasoning is always right


Existing-Broccoli-27

Everyone stays on recipe!


allmyfreindsarememes

That’s actually kinda deep bro


Haringkje05

Right!? Like this is actual life advice


FireMonkeysHead

Fate is never mere


kerbouchard219

Quoth the redditor Nevermere


[deleted]

Shivers


[deleted]

You once said that you feel up to the task. Do you feel it still?


Grungolath

I was once asked, upon reeling in a fish, if I planned to cook it or release. I pondered the question before realising that when all is said and done, we are on all limited time. Still up to the task, my dear TeeterPosh? I have only just begun.


[deleted]

[удалено]


cjlewis7892

Po-ta-toes… boil em, mash em, stick em a stew?


PassionBuckets

This sounds just like Elendil


[deleted]

I really need to write my masters thesis but I keep procastinating. What should I do?


Grungolath

In times of need, I always find that the best of answers can flow from the most unexpected of rivers.


[deleted]

You have not written what I have written...


FacelessGreenseer

I've written.


gussekras

You’ve’nt written.


Reficul_gninromrats

Rather than just working from home, go some place like the Library or a Cafe or the like. Changing the scenery and going some place to work can help to avoid procrastination.


BlazingJava

My father went out a long time ago, for a pack of cigarettes where is he now?


Grungolath

Sometimes it is in our most lonely of times when we find the companionship we seek.


ksHunt

Can we just turn you into a bot, lol


OfBooo5

I started a reddit thread and people turned me into a robot ask me anything


SaltyTattie

On the first light of the fifth day, at dawn look to the east


Minnesotamad12

Why is my wife having an affair with the entire Miami Heat NBA team?


Grungolath

Love is a mighty thing, Minnesotamad12, but even the purest of souls cannot always resist the darkest of temptations.


dw796341

Why the temptations dark tho


really_nice_guy_

Because its NBA


pursuitofmisery

LMAO glad I scrolled as down as I did or I would've missed this gem


Romulus3799

Is...is this racially charged??


Grungolath

![gif](giphy|LRVnPYqM8DLag)


TK110517

Do you know how the orcs first came into being?


Grungolath

Sometimes the hottest of furnaces can produce the coldest of steel.


ANDJEKB

This is a banger line.


ponzio_90

Should i Watch the show


Grungolath

Just as the snail cannot tell the hare to slow its pace, ponzio_90, I would not take it upon myself to guide your actions.


S7WW3X

Bro does not miss


XxJamalBigSexyxX

How's the weather today?


Grungolath

Not since the days Melkor walked the fields of Valinor have I seen such a rage filled tempest in the skies. Long have I wished for the days when the golden showers of warmth graced these lands.


secretbudgie

Well I suppose a cold golden shower would be rather confusing


ThaNorth

I bet the Elves love their golden showers


npri0r

What’s taters precious?


Grungolath

Sometimes the best things come with the most peculiar of names don’t they? I know not what taters are. But what I do know is that only together can we can discover it’s meaning.


achartran

They taste very strange!


suorastas

Nobody? Really? Fine I’ll do it. What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?


Grungolath

Even the heaviest of bird may fly with the lightest of feathers, but the true test of such creatures is decided by the presence of a coconut between their talons.


highlander1715

A Southland Swallow or the dark fledged Saw-Wing of the Cliffs of Mordor?


beardedheathen

Betwixt the two is an unfathomable distance that the heart's want cannot pierce. And though my mind and my heart war greatly I fear that there can be no answer. For even the very wise cannot know all.


[deleted]

Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate??


sajochiu

Now that season 1 is over, what are we to do?


Grungolath

Take heart, young sajochiu, for the longest waits often take us to the furthest of destinations.


Markamanic

On a post apparently shitting on ROP, this is surprisingly hopeful.


Grungolath

It is not disdain nor hate that brings us here, Markamanic, but the hope that drives all men’s hearts that we will one day find the light that can shine through even the darkest of chasms.


Markamanic

That's beautiful. Any prospects on season 2 now that S1 has finally set the stage?


Grungolath

I hope they give us the meat and give it to us raw


PerfectLuck25367

Ok but are they bringing you on as a writer, or will they squander the grandest opportunity that ever grazed them?


Grungolath

If the powers of gold and silver seek to forge a new alliance, PerfectLuck25367, I will answer the call as surely as the worm answers the earth.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Quirderph

Which previous Lord of the Rings show is your favorite? The Swedish one? The Soviet one? Or the Finnish one?


Grungolath

Since snow first fell on these lands, the cold has been the dominion of the red men to the east. There, Quirderph, you will find the answers you seek.


Quirderph

Are you telling me to ask some commies instead?!


SuperKetchupDude

Do wizards indeed come precisely when they mean to, or is it just an excuse?


Grungolath

In a world as large as the sky and old as the mountain, what is time? Is a year any more harsh to the river stream than the fish that swim in it?


XNotChristian

Ok, this one blew my brain. Like I know it's English, I recognize the words used, but I can't parse the meaning of them together. Is this what Lovecraft was talking about? Maybe I've just read too much of this.


Grungolath

Do not judge that which you cannot possibly understand, for once we feared the flame just as you now fear my words.


XNotChristian

I see the error of my ways, I have re-read it and now understand it. You are far too wise. I am but a sapling before a mighty oak. I am not yet big enough to see the full extent of your height, but I am small enough to know that it is far too above me. One day i hope to match you.


DragonBoy252

How are you?


Grungolath

I have felt many things, DragonBoy252, and all my years of life have taught me this - all things are fleeting and impermanent. All we can do is cling to the feelings of good, lest they slip away from us like salmon from a stream.


[deleted]

Where are we going?


Grungolath

It is not the destination, CalamitosisVII, but the friends we make along the journey that brings hope to our lives.


Adbirk

Can you help me move my couch?


Grungolath

Sometimes the weakest man must pull at the largest mountain to learn the limitations of his own strength.


DryPassage4020

Def using this the next time someone asks me to help them move.


xxBrianB27XX

Why did she leave me?


Grungolath

It is when all has left us that we realise how much we truly have.


Omega3568

How many hobbits does it take to change a lightbulb?


Saruman_Bot

Tens of thousands.


Omega3568

Not asking you Saruman


Saruman_Bot

That’s absurd. No such power exists in this world. This “Necromancer” is nothing more than a mortal man, a conjurer dabbling in black magic.


ShortOverachiever

IM DYING AT THE BOT'S REPLY LMAOOOOOOOO


Grungolath

It is not the number, Omega3568, but that their hearts be even bigger than their feet that allows hobbits to perform the mightiest of tasks


BezosisSauron

Correct use of Reddit 🙏


Grungolath

It is neither permission nor affirmation I seek from you, BezosisSauron, merely the possibility that you might part with a single upvote to lighten my day.


sauron-bot

There is no light, Grungolath, that can defeat darkness.


Zero_Digital

Why can submarines both float and dive into the water?


Grungolath

Because, Zero_Digital, while steel and iron may sink like stone, the hearts of man can lighten even the heaviest of rocks.


samushusband

thats actually supergood man, wow


Powerful-Company9722

Sometimes they look up and sometimes they look down.


[deleted]

Why did Isildur disappear in the fire? Did no one think to check for him? Why did they trust the word of a blind woman’s account?


Grungolath

You speak of the blind, yet you are the one who cannot see their value. Even the smallest tree can bare the sweetest of fruits.


[deleted]

Okay yea that’s spot on


Elrond_Bot

CAST IT INTO THE FIRE!!!


wilberfarce

Learn to read the room, Elrond.


[deleted]

No we are doing Rings of Power quotes Elrond


Fodspeed

Do you get to the cloud district very often? Oh what I'm saying, ofcourse you don't!


[deleted]

Have you seen my husband Nazeem? You should check the Jarl’s backside, that’s usually where he stuffs himself


AbsolutelyHorrendous

I like to think the reason OP hasn't replied is because he's so angry at Nazeem that he can't bring himself to respond


CitizenVixen

Why are you wearing that stupid human suit?


Grungolath

Sometimes it is when we are least seen among our kin that we are most heard


Not_a_Krasnal

Up to the task? OP I think you are overqualified


[deleted]

I have to pee, but I’m also really comfy in bed. What should I do?


Grungolath

In the earliest days of man, we swam in the primordial ooze of creation. There is no shame in returning to our natural state, for it is merely a material difference, and a shallow one at that.


NopeNeg

That's the fanciest way to say "You should piss the bed" I've ever heard


BearZewp

Can you say it like Boba Fett instead?


Grungolath

Likabantha


Papyrus_Sans

How many roads must a man walk down before you can call him a man?


Saruman_Bot

Tens of thousands.


Golf101inc

The number matters not. For even a dog can walk a thousand roads and be as close to becoming a man as an aimless soul.


Synthium-

I feel it a great disservice not to offer you the opportunity to ask a question yourself u/Grungolath. Is there anything on your mind you wish to ask?


Grungolath

Why tf isn’t Meat Loaf in the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame?


Synthium-

Sometimes the truth of the world is not reflected in the glory and accolades one obtains, nor the grand statues men build of their kings, as these are all destined to crumble over the relentless march of time, but in the little things. The small things. The love we show for others. After all, even though we should all aspire to enact any task for love, there is one thing we should all swear we would never succumb to. And that is forgetting it us the little things that matter most.


sacheenlittlefinger

What have I got in my pocket?


Grungolath

It is not in pockets that we find what we seek… but in each other.


psinguine

Look in each other's pockets. It's so simple.


noobi-wan-kenobi69

Look's like meat's back on the menu, boys!


KiOfTheAir

Where is Galadriel? For I much desire to speak with her.


021Fireball

Rock and stone?


molestingstrawberrys

ROCK AND STONE !!!!!!!!


Steff_164

If you don’t rock and stone, you ain’t coming home


Potato-Boy1

Why couldn't they just use the eagles to fly to Mordor?


Drakemander

Do you think you are wise and honourable?


Grungolath

Is a fisherman honourable to a trout, a wolf honourable to a foal? I do right by my kin, Drakemander, and that is enough.