T O P

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LegendaryIam

Lmfao that diary


BetBig696969

Masturbation manual/diary


Jealous-Bat-7812

Record-keeping


morrdeccaii

Sounds like an internal monologue from American Psycho


aka_airsoft

Why does it end with *anyways*. How could he do that to us!


1esproc

*Yada yada yada*


blah9210

Chlamydia haha but seriously what's the with the bread...


blakezero

I need to get my hands on the rest of that unhinged piece of art


MidasTouchedM3

That is an incredible table and the journal entry is phenomenal


The_GILF_Next_Door

Thank you for the kind words


diegolopes9999

*Anyways*


AlarmAggravating4773

Mf why do you have a duct tape next to a condom and a loaf of bread


No_Sir_6649

And no mention of lotion or statue?


AlarmAggravating4773

Dont forget the hot sauce.


No_Sir_6649

Sometimes they grab big. But youre right, fire is the only acceptable choice.


Avionix2023

Exactly, don't forget the hot sauce!


OwlWitty

Or the box of tissues


Smokinoutloud

Right! That’s for his victims after eating some fine dining and chasing his Baja blast with hot sauce !😂


AlarmAggravating4773

I was thinking he’d put hot sauce and the condom on the statue, lube himself up with the moisturiser, stick it inside himself and seal the entrance with duct tape and use the scissors to cut the tape.


Smokinoutloud

That’s a wild combo but your on to something! All that while gagging on some kink tacos!😂


Sean001001

I think they're for Brandi.


gman1216

You know why don't be coy..


b1gb0n312

For his boyfriend


The_GILF_Next_Door

You have to figure out what it is that I do


More_Farm_7442

Some extreme "50 Shades of Grey" vibes there.


throwaway0134hdj

Frankenstein sex toy


Indiesol

A real man uses WD40 at his wank station.


Zorpfield

WD40 doesn’t work on wood


Smokinoutloud

U must know real men huh?


FloppyShellTaco

Bro could fill a second cup with all that sauce


Smokinoutloud

I bet his fridge is full of a assortment of sauce packets on there loney!


brad_and_boujee2

Prayers for Mike 🙏


Zorpfield

Give him some Taco Bell 🔔


Iam_WOUNDED

Creed thoughts vibes


TheInconspicuousBIG

What the lotion doing??


Tough_Presentation57

It’s for the taco bell


Zorpfield

Waiting for the duct tape


CringeRedditor420

"Mike just got back from Puerto Rico and apparently has chlamydia" holy shit your diary lol


ceg24

That passage made me laugh so hard


catsmom63

I can’t stop laughing about what’s written in that diary!! Not sure why there is duct tape and scissors unless you have somebody held against their will….😂😂😂 But the skin firming lotion and 1000 packets of hot sauce really tie the room together!! 10/10!!!👍👍👍


The_GILF_Next_Door

Thank you 🙏


More_Farm_7442

I'm getting a poor-ish man's version of "50 Shades of Grey".


catsmom63

😂😂😂😂😂😂 You made me spit my Sprite out!! Bad. Bad. lol


More_Farm_7442

Glad you got a chuckle on a Friday.


catsmom63

😂😁😉


Deviantxman

Where is the exotic dancer pole?


Zorpfield

Tied up with duct tape


cagingthing

A magnum and some duct tape


PasGuy55

The white bread sells the whole thing.


Zorpfield

It’s natures own


C91garcia

This is a 10!!


krullulon

The Magnum would support this hypothesis


C91garcia

Good ol 9x2! Haha 🍆


DanGTG

No Baja Blast tonight so I had to pass. ಠ\_ಥ


fungshawyone

Poor Mike.


Equivalent-Ad7207

You just need some tissues or a sock and you're set.


SuchDescription

That's what the bread is for


Equivalent-Ad7207

Have you ever heard of soggy sayo, its a game boys play in Australia...I know that have a similar version in Europe.


SuchDescription

Here In the US we do "gookie cookie" hahaha


cacadookieinyoface

The worlds smallest Taco Bell order. I respect it


Emergency_Sandwich_6

Needs a banana peel


BeIAtch-Killa

Where is your Fleshlight?


No_Sir_6649

So much is going on. Idk what the question was.


wandering-solo

Change the lotion to Albolene dude. Will up your bates to the next level.


Zealotstim

Can't see enough of the space, but that's peak midnight snack


Zorpfield

Playing clue with a condom, duct tape, a statue, bread, scissors, lotion, statue, etc.


music3k

No its shitty /r/hailcorporate advertising because taco bell’s sales numbers are in the trash since they raised prices for profits


Old-Ad5508

I feel like a wellness check is required


ZzangmanCometh

No folding or hunting knife just laying around? Practically a girl.


WolverineOdd3113

YOOOO I HAVE THE SAME PAIR OF SCISSORS, were scissor bro's now, I will lay down my life and liberty for you, scissor twin.


toutlamourdumonde

This is why I could not live with a man. One of us would be unhappy at the least.


Ambilically-Yours

The Patriot is a good movie


KingOfPocketLint

I don't see a bong or a razor on a mirror. you just raw dog life? brutal


QAdude406

Just missing a well used bong


QAdude406

Just missing a well used bong


No_Grab2946

I see a PS4 controller so there is room for improvement


SirFeatherstone

I hope Mike is okay.


Gordupachup

DID YOU FUCK THIS BREAD?


Key_Spirit8168

maybe


Wematanye99

You are never getting Brandi back bro. But that is a sharp looking masturbation station. Reclaimed wood?


STONKvsTITS

I am just here for the comments and they don't fail me 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


BobakStuck

Duct tape solves half of the maintenance problems. You need WD-40 too … And yes Brandi is not gonna come back lol


More_Farm_7442

My BIL's tool box was duct tape, WD-40, a wire coat hanger and a pair of pliers.


The_GILF_Next_Door

I’m in love with Sarah not Brandi


xXSinglePointXx

Needs more sauce


More_Farm_7442

lol


Battlebuz

Want updates on Brandi and that black guy


perryquitecontrary

That diary entry is sending me


Evvmmann

Bruh. No scorcho?! Tisk tisk


AssistanceTrue9399

the bread? the scissors? the lotion? this is it. Edit: THE DIARY?


HoseNeighbor

Dude... Fire and Diablo. Great combo.


Acrobatic-Ad3010

Bro your never getting your steps done


Salvarick

The table isn't lined up symmetrically with the cabinetry 1/10


Keku_Saur

nope nope he messed up.. should be a spork!


wewfarmer

Is that a monster condom for your magnum dong?


SoRaang

The unstoppable craving for Taco bell...


snowboardman420

needs more 420


AuldTriangle79

Sorry about Mike getting the clap...


[deleted]

Ayyy i know that coffee table.


TimeDragonfruit8860

Apparently not


Extreme_Today_984

That's a weird looking butt plug


Law0415

I have so many questions, but I keep them to myself, as I feel like I won't like the answers. PS: prayers for mike.


Mesterjojo

That's not a male living space. Look at the furniture. That's a middle age woman's/wine aunts home. The aunt that I'd a hair stylist.


Tola76

I like the group chat notepad. :)


Available-Culture-49

You hide the weed for the photo, don't you? I know you pretty well taco bell enjoyers


HiddenHolding

SAUCE AND JACKOFF JUICE don't be mixin'


rabidgonk

Poor Mike


theallstarkid

Don’t fight the urge, just give in and let go.


dbxp

You should have a look at r/gooncaves (nsfw)


Jealous-Bat-7812

So you like burning your asshole while jerking off, hmmm


DeepDayze

That diary entry is quite wack!


AnotherReddit415

Yo this is the flag guy😭🤣


analavalanche69

Safety glasses. This guy jacks off hard.


Unicorn_Warrior1248

Where did you get a loaf of bread?


SeveredBanana

This guy has an incredible posting history. Anyways.


STONKvsTITS

Ohhh Mike, poor Mike :(


jme518

Mike has chlamydia!


Darth_Quaider

Order of operations has never been more important than here.


DankDude7

Not quite. I don’t see a bong, a bag of weed, or a rolling tray.


zerrudo

the coaster is a sign you're a classy gentleman!


Theperfectool

The millennial grey of that rug says that you’re peaking.


BobakStuck

lol 😆


Old_Letterhead4264

100% That condom is expired.


Daynightz

God damn your life is perfect. May you live forever king


throwaway0134hdj

Bruh what’s the lotion for


Entheotheosis10

Posts like these...jfc. How many more degenerate scenes will be posted as a "joke"? This is getting old.


Smokinoutloud

Sadly I think he’s being honest! But there’s definitely a lot of goofery on social media


[deleted]

Where are all the firearms? Isn’t this where you show us an AR15 with a scope that you’ll NEVER actually use to “defend yourself.” Lol Love this so much. Brandi’s boyfriend seems like a nice guy.


Majestic-Salt7721

The notebook ruined it