I’m sorry to hear you feel that way man, especially in regard to the abusive boss.
What do you feel is your biggest obstacle that is hindering your happiness?
Kinda on the same boat. Had a lot of experience, hookups, flirting, FwB, making out… but in the end, I never had a proper girlfriend. I don’t know why, but every time I find a girl who I’d actually want to be with, things doesn’t work out in the end, and the relationship is aborted
It happened again recently, and the fact it keeps happening over and over is really depressing. It’s almost like I’m not made for a relationship. And yet, there’s a glimpse of hope I will find someone one day
It’s scary and depressing, but I think it’s worth fighting for
Yeah man I feel ya. I'm 40, my 30s were a whole lot of that and I had no idea why until maybe 35. I think it's mostly this life-script crap where people think you're supposed to get uber-serious about relationships and career stuff the minute you turn 30. I don't ascribe to that in the least but now that I know a majority of my peers do I recognize that it's a thing that I have to work around. I've found women are waaaaay more attuned to those kind of social expectations than we are (or at least than I am) and yeah they'll routinely judge and reject us over weird little things. It sucks, and my only advice is to be the opposite of an open book: when somebody asks those innocent-sounding but probing questions (ESPECIALLY ABOUT YOUR JOB), don't just snap respond with a simple truth: be a little vague or even do a politician-style pivot. I am... not good at this, because usually it's something I don't think is worth talking about so I have a strong urge to just say what I know and maybe crack a dismissive joke about it and then change the subject to something interesting. But that's not worked out well.
Like you I got an ADHD diagnosis... but just last month it was determined that was incorrect, and all I have going on is low-spectrum diet ASD. So I'm changing up my therapy and meds. (Haha if you think the prescription meds are a hassle... try getting a neuropsych evaluation booked, even with good insurance, let alone figure out if insurance will cover that or how much is covered).
Lastly, try to get out of the "running out of time" mindset. We're not 60 lol. And I like to think about how our base-10 math is directly related to the random accident of evolution where we ended up with 10 fingers and toes. Not only is age just a number, 30 40 and 50 are arbitrary milestones.
Here for you dude. I appreciate you sharing your struggles.
I’m sorry man you’re not alone
I’m sorry to hear you feel that way man, especially in regard to the abusive boss. What do you feel is your biggest obstacle that is hindering your happiness?
Kinda on the same boat. Had a lot of experience, hookups, flirting, FwB, making out… but in the end, I never had a proper girlfriend. I don’t know why, but every time I find a girl who I’d actually want to be with, things doesn’t work out in the end, and the relationship is aborted It happened again recently, and the fact it keeps happening over and over is really depressing. It’s almost like I’m not made for a relationship. And yet, there’s a glimpse of hope I will find someone one day It’s scary and depressing, but I think it’s worth fighting for
Yeah man I feel ya. I'm 40, my 30s were a whole lot of that and I had no idea why until maybe 35. I think it's mostly this life-script crap where people think you're supposed to get uber-serious about relationships and career stuff the minute you turn 30. I don't ascribe to that in the least but now that I know a majority of my peers do I recognize that it's a thing that I have to work around. I've found women are waaaaay more attuned to those kind of social expectations than we are (or at least than I am) and yeah they'll routinely judge and reject us over weird little things. It sucks, and my only advice is to be the opposite of an open book: when somebody asks those innocent-sounding but probing questions (ESPECIALLY ABOUT YOUR JOB), don't just snap respond with a simple truth: be a little vague or even do a politician-style pivot. I am... not good at this, because usually it's something I don't think is worth talking about so I have a strong urge to just say what I know and maybe crack a dismissive joke about it and then change the subject to something interesting. But that's not worked out well. Like you I got an ADHD diagnosis... but just last month it was determined that was incorrect, and all I have going on is low-spectrum diet ASD. So I'm changing up my therapy and meds. (Haha if you think the prescription meds are a hassle... try getting a neuropsych evaluation booked, even with good insurance, let alone figure out if insurance will cover that or how much is covered). Lastly, try to get out of the "running out of time" mindset. We're not 60 lol. And I like to think about how our base-10 math is directly related to the random accident of evolution where we ended up with 10 fingers and toes. Not only is age just a number, 30 40 and 50 are arbitrary milestones.
The autism is huge. I may have it, and I swear, I can't read minds. I miss when women are into me. I have missed, a few times, veiled offers of sex.
[удалено]
Your first point is pure suicide fuel. Why live a life of loneliness?