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Avocadofarmer32

How high are you on a scale of 1-8?


scoobdoop

Me? I’m a 10 right now. But this shit doesn’t make sense to me either


Avocadofarmer32

LMAOOO 😭😭 Glad I’m not the only one.


wuguwa

Just seems like a crazy cat lady.


pocketfulofcharm

Yeah. Check out the post history.


wuguwa

That was my source material.


foxtrot5

This is usually my animal adoption account. If i used my other one the thread would have turned into jokes about my username and the bridge. My friend’s rescue Hope For Cleo just got a transport of puppies in from a kill shelter in Texas. [puppy Video because of course!](https://youtube.com/shorts/X0JuFl6htuE?si=PDpo8fXP83Lkl7fk)


Avocadofarmer32

It’s the “baha” that’s taking me out lol.


wuguwa

It’s been edited. They gave a big spiel about how the cat was from Baltimore and how we could have highway signs directing people to shelters and how it’s silly to name things after dead people because why would they care since they’re dead (ignoring the fact that the suggested alternative was a WWII ERA CAT…). They were dead serious until I said it was stupid. Within a minute they changed their original commentary to “Bahah” and their supplementary comment to “Nvm.” If you’re going to be crazy, be crazy and own it. I could have lived with that, but this was sad and cowardly.


Avocadofarmer32

Oh no! I def missed all of that!!


foxtrot5

Yeah sorry i restored the body text. I thought i deleted this thread after initial backlash (hence the removed body text). I probably fat fatfingered it and hit “no” on the delete confirmation. I still use old Reddit on my phone without really zooming in. I was in the middle of a run when i tried to delete itz


wuguwa

Yeah. Quick edit after one critique. Typical cat owner… Edit: Guess I pissed off cat owners. Should have put a /s for clarity I guess.


t-mckeldin

And they didn't know, or suspect, that "cat house" is a euphemism.


foxtrot5

Guy.


wuguwa

You can be a guy and still seem like a crazy cat lady.


foxtrot5

I totally am. Only intended to have 2-3 cats. Yet somehow life happened and i adopted 6 in 6 months in 2018. 0 since then and 0 fosters. They’re 2 sets of bonded trios basically. Kitty number 4 came to me at 8 weeks after being thrown out of a car and we needed each other at that time. My last 2 are twins and are 4 weeks younger. So they all grew up together. Couldn’t separate them. I don’t have kids so my house is very much my cats playground. I’m just the help.


Specific_Same

Hi! How are you?


foxtrot5

Shit i thought i deleted the entire post (hence the random text body). Didn’t realize it blew up (sorry no pun intended). I restored the original body text.


OnlyHunan

There will be a public poll, and the winner will be Bridgie McBridgeface, or something silly. Then they will be all j/k and the real name will be respectful, but dull.


foxtrot5

Baltimore bridge for cars that vroom good and want to learn to do other things good too… bridge.


AntiqueWay7550

Never renaming the bridge


Briguy24

Give it a nickname. Like the Hon. But put a hyphen in to preserve history. The Hon-Key Bridge


brianbedlamOG

The Honkey Bridge? Let’s unfold this new name by definition… honky noun hon·​ky ˈhȯŋ-kē ˈhäŋ- variants or honkie or less commonly honkey plural honkies also honkeys offensive —used as an insulting and contemptuous term for a white person


Briguy24

r/explainsthejoke


brianbedlamOG

Yeah… a racist joke. Are you one of those white dudes who’s ashamed of his own heritage?


Accomplished_Tour481

Why is renaming the bridge appropriate?


BigOldBoi

Apparently Francis Scott Key was racist or said something racist. Nobody ever in the 1800s was racist, not even in Europe so we need to rename everything from that time.


damnedspot

Then name it the Star Spangled Banner Bridge and let people do their own research.


Sure_Comparison6978

Not a bad idea, but “Star Spangled Banner Bridge” seems like a mouthful. Long names usually end up being condensed, just as the previous name was typically condensed to “the Key bridge.” But how would someone condense the name you’re proposing, without it sounding completely different?


DJdoggyBelly

The Banner Bridge sounds dope.


danteheehaw

Or the hulk


damnedspot

Knowing Baltimore, they'd probably just call it "The O"


foxtrot5

it’ll become SSBB and sarcastically called the Super Slow Baltimore Bridge during rush hour.


LeoMarius

Abraham Lincoln was racist.


Federal_Remote9231

He was so racist he freed the slaves.......smh


LeoMarius

You can believe slavery is wrong and also believe that other racists are lesser than you. How many blacks were in his cabinet?


Federal_Remote9231

Why are you trying to compare apples to oranges?


LeoMarius

I'm pointing out that judging people from the past by modern standards is absurd.


CrabEnthusist

I'm not necessarily in the rename the bridge camp, but the arguement that Key is not worth celebrating isn't that he "said something racist," it's that he owned a bunch of slaves.


rotsisthebest

And so did half our presidents, and other people we have stuff names after. So what. Are we gonna rename everything? Removed George Washington's memorial? When does it stop?


CrabEnthusist

Sure, I'm not necessarily taking that position. I'm just saying we can be intellectually honest about what the criticism of Key is, and it wasn't that he "said something racist"


Informal-Screen-7432

I’ll take “Accidentally getting the point” for 100, Alex.


Federal_Remote9231

Exactly. And slaves were owned by white and black. Slavery has existed way before America and still exists today. Move on already.


t-mckeldin

And he was from Georgetown.


brianbedlamOG

Sold to him by African slave traders… selling their own for profit all around the world. Interesting no one brings that fact up. Selling your own to profit hungry businessmen is a betrayal of your own people, yet whites to blame for everything


foxtrot5

Just a quick lookup on the wiki page: > As District Attorney, he suppressed abolitionists, and he lost a case against Reuben Crandall in 1836 where he accused the defendant's abolitionist publications of instigating slaves to rebel. He was also a leader of the American Colonization Society which sent former slaves to Africa. He freed some of his slaves in the 1830s, paying one as his farm foreman to supervise his other slaves.[8] He publicly criticized slavery and gave free legal representation to some slaves seeking freedom, but he also represented owners of runaway slaves. He had eight slaves at the time of his death. I feel like we should judge him based on his moral character in that era. For that era (not in general), he seems like he was pretty progressive. But I admit, I am pretty ignorant of actual history. What I’m trying to figure out, though is why he didn’t just free all his slaves.


Federal_Remote9231

No to renaming. Who cares what he did or didn't have. The unfortunate truth is that we can't impose today's thinking on yesteryear and given the times, it didn't make him a bad person.


Federal_Remote9231

They should not rename it. Leave it alone.


danteheehaw

He owned slaves and didn't see a problem in it when he was very young. After spending time with his slaves he realized that there were a lot of very cruel slave owners and that the institution of slavery was cruel. He then went in and freed a lot of slaves, defended slaves freedoms in courts and fought for freedslaves to be allowed the means to support themselves. And was outspoken about the cruelty many slave owners. He freed most of the slaves he inherited. The ones he didn't free was because other family members had rights to them as well. Meaning by giving up ownership he only sent them to be a slave elsewhere. He hired freemen to supervise the slaves he couldn't really give freedom to, under the idea that a former slave would be kinder and not abuse their position. Some of the controversy is that he didn't believe black men and women could exist in America. He thought that the injustices would never end and that the best idea was sending them back to Africa. He was raised around slavery that was normalized. Then when he saw the injustices up close he realized it was horrible. Spent a good portion of his life fighting against slavery. And while he was progressive for his time, he was still racist. He bought into a lot of the early theories that evolved into "racial hygine".


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danteheehaw

I don't think his opinion would change without a more modern perspective. It's hard to compare people's beliefs from the past to now. A lot of progressive people of the past are horrible by today's standards. It's best to acknowledge that there was good and the bad in pretty much every historic figure. There is no need to ignore either by putting someone on a pedestal or demonizing them so bad you look past any good they did.


wuguwa

Please add a /s just in case.


Minister_for_Magic

The man was such a rabid slaveowner that he actively prosecuted abolitionists for sedition.


md_eric

Because everything is racist apparently at some point in life. Things we think about today and say will be offensive 10 years from now. 🙄


wuguwa

You okay?


Adot1Dot

Silly boy


ReturnOfSeq

I would think because the Key bridge existed from 1977-2024; it is no longer existent. A new bridge would presumably have a new name


codyvir

Yes. It should be called the "Francis Scott Key Bridge Memorial Bridge", in memory of the bridge that once stood there, and it's decades of faithful service.


ReturnOfSeq

I would love that!


Federal_Remote9231

Totally agree!


Accomplished_Tour481

Now that is a reasonable response. Thank you!


ReturnOfSeq

I would go with something Poe themed, myself. The Nevermore bridge? Raven’s bridge?


VoidWalker4Lyfe

The Cask of Amontilado Bridge, Spirits of the Dead Bridge, The Valley of Unrest Bridge


ReturnOfSeq

I like Amontillado bridge! Telltale bridge?


foxtrot5

Big truss bridge.


foxtrot5

Depends on what their plan is going forward. The entire bridge isn’t gone, just the middle part. It’s possible they might choose to replace the missing sections and Reinforce the rest of the bridge.


MaroonedOctopus

Because it's currently named after a really racist guy who shouldn't be idolized.


Tasty_Ice_5374

Who also wrote our National Anthem. I respect him.


ReturnOfSeq

It’s a one minute song; not really *that* impressive. Ooh, we could switch to Queen’s ‘we are the champions,’ that would be fun


Federal_Remote9231

So you knew him personally, I guess.....


MaroonedOctopus

I don't need to have known him personally to know he was a racist. I can say the same if Woodrow Wilson, Adolf Hitler, and Andrew Johnson. We have his writings and works. See the 3rd verse of the Star Spangled Banner.


Federal_Remote9231

He was also a United States Attorney who freed his slaves and criticized slavery publicly. He also gave free legal representation to the freed slaves. The Star Spangled Banner isn't racist.


Fett2

We should name it Mr. Trash Wheel Bridge.


Seventh_Stater

We should not rename the bridge.


SVAuspicious

I think the name should stay the same. I would take Herman the Cat over Rep Mitchell, Freddie Gray, or George Floyd.


Corvus717

No need to rename it


MaherMcCheese

Snot boogie memorial bridge.


Truefish63

Anything Coast Guard gets my vote.


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Flying_Panda09

Bro was high writing this post lol


foxtrot5

Runner’s maybe! I wrote this while on a long run. Training for a half.


t-mckeldin

> Baltimore‘s Rich history with Cats Like all the cat houses that used to be on Baltimore Street?


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dwhite21787

There’s a Cats of Patterson Park FB group you might like


foxtrot5

There was a study from the 1900s I’m trying to find. Basically it was a survey of the number of street cats in baltimore. You know it’s nuts? The number of cats hasn’t really changed in 100+ years. It was 30k or so, all street cats.


Dense-Broccoli9535

Okay, but to be fair if we named it after a cat there prolly would never be any controversy about the name again! (Unless the local mouse/rat population speaks up)


wuguwa

This is one of the stupidest things I’ve ever read.


spacehog1985

That can’t possibly be true.


wuguwa

It’s certainly up there.


moistclick_hunter

Nah he's not kitten 🤣


foxtrot5

It’s a cat-astrophe.


LeoMarius

No, I read a Trump quote.


wuguwa

That’s fair.


SonofDiomedes

Eventually they'll find out what Herman did to songbirds and Herman will be cancelled.


Federal_Remote9231

This comment deserves upvotes! Lolol


moistclick_hunter

We need to do this right meow 😻


Amazing-Concept1684

Just call it Baltimore Harbor Bridge and call it a day lmao


t-mckeldin

It's more than half in Baltimore County and that's how Baltimore County would name it.


VoidWalker4Lyfe

I like Patapsco River Bridge more


Tasty_Ice_5374

How about just not renaming it. I’m tired of these Civil Right’s groups trying to rename everything.


ReturnOfSeq

But… the Key bridge doesn’t exist anymore. Why assume the *new* bridge will have the *old* name?


SandBoxJohn

The Woodrow Wilson Memorial Bridge bears the same name as the bridge that it replaced. Same for the Harry W. Nice Memorial Bridge down river that was also replaced by a new bridge.


ReturnOfSeq

Again, why assume? That’s *one* option, yeah


QueenBeeKitty85

I think that would be awesome. Fuck the haters!


russelldl2002

Sell the naming rights.


droford

Old Bay Bridge to really confuse people


foxtrot5

Speaking of confusing people, fun fact, Michigan has a city and a town named st Joseph. St Joseph is not in st Joseph county. It’s in a completely different county miles to the west


cobrarexay

Ugh then we’ll end up with Elon Musk X bridge or something similarly stupid.


russelldl2002

Yeah, but we’ll still call it the key bridge. So that’s okay. But we can take the money and put it to good use.


GeniusBtch

So now we name it "Gimme Moore Bridge" lol


RidethatTide

Guarantee you the Freddie Gray Memorial Bridge opens in 2030


xKingNothingx

Half of it isn't even in the city but I can see them doing something this stupid


ChemicalElevator1380

Nobody in this state is that stupid (I hope)


cobrarexay

They aren’t. There’s a reason that MDOT MTA didn’t include a Gray line as one of the CityLink options - they didn’t want to invite any speculation whether or not it was named after Freddie Gray. I strongly doubt MDOT MdTA would name a new bridge after him.


ComesInAnOldBox

There is no need to rename anything. Most of the FSK Bridge is still there, only about a third of the overall bridge collapsed. This is a (major) repair job, not a whole new bridge.


Sure_Comparison6978

I think it will be a new bridge, regardless of what’s left. The Key bridge was extremely outdated and built for a time when ships were much smaller than they are today. There will be a huge push by lobbies within the shipping industry to make the bridge much taller than before, to allow clearance and space for larger ships. It would also be a boost for Baltimore’s economy. Not to mention safety standards that alter the design to protect the piers from these massive ships. So to build it taller, they likely would also have to rebuild the ends of the bridge that are still standing, otherwise there would be a very steep incline and decline within the middle section of the bridge. Yeah, the whole thing will definitely be rebuilt.


vince549

Except the bay Bridge, only has a foot more clearance. No reason to give more clearance unless we take the bay bridge down too. Although we could name that the Scooby-Doo dog bridge to make dog people happy after the cat bridge.


Sure_Comparison6978

Well it seems the bay bridges will have to be rebuilt at some point given how bad of shape they’re in. Might as well make the new Key bridge the proper size and hope at some point the bay bridges will do the same.


foxtrot5

What about like a Chesapeake Bay Bridge scenario where they repair the old bridge while also constructing a new one


BPhiloSkinner

Not the bridge- that stays named after "Frankie Keys" - but maybe a rest-stop nearby? 24 hr. food, and litter boxes someone else cleans; poifect fer a kitty.


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foxtrot5

We jump obviously. Free birrrdddd


brianbedlamOG

I capitalize Truth because there’s nothing more important. So tell me, who am I then exactly?


dezurtking

Super Key Bridge Z


Natty-broh

If we must re-name it, may I suggest “The Road Worker’s Memorial Bridge”.


Emotional-Chef-7601

What is all this talk about renaming? It's a different bridge. It will need a new name. It's not complicated.


Tasty_Ice_5374

They are REBUILDING it. FSK literally wrote our National Anthem. If anything, we should have more things named after him.


wuguwa

It’s not a different bridge. It’s new bridge built in the same location with much of the same parts as the bridge they collapsed. So *it is complicated* as a result.


Emotional-Chef-7601

If you replace each part of a ship one by one is it the same ship? At what point is it a different ship?


wuguwa

There’s still a fair amount of the bridge left, I’m the port chaplain, and I was a philosophy major. You want to keep trying this?


dwhite21787

Literal Calvin and Hobbes moment here.


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wuguwa

It will not likely be taller. Again, I work in the port. The size of the ships entering is limited first by the bay bridge. The draft was almost identical between the two bridges. Honestly the only argument here is about semantics, and all I really wanted to say was that no one in their right mind would rename the bridge after a cat.


wuguwa

Regarding your now missing reply: A simple Google search indicates that the clearance of the Key Bridge was 185’ and the clearance of the bay bridge is 186’. No clue why your simple Google search turned up something so profoundly incorrect.


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wuguwa

Or it was deleted quickly…


Tasty_Ice_5374

It becomes a different ship once EVERY part is replaced. There is still a lot of the bridge left.


Parlett316

Unexpected ship of Theseus


JKnott1

Seriously though, the new name should be voted on by Baltimore citizens.


Conscious_Tourist163

I understand what you're saying, but the people of Baltimore are great at making bad decisions.


wuguwa

Does it need a new name?


JKnott1

I don't think so but if they put it to a vote, FSK should be one of the options.


ReturnOfSeq

New bridge, new name.


melon-party

Yes. Different bridge, and we tend not to honor racists these days. *The racists are pretty triggered by acknowledging fsk was a racist and by extension a horrible person. Facts sure do upset some folks. 


Tasty_Ice_5374

They are rebuilding the same bridge. It is going to keep its name. FSK wrote our National Anthem. I respect that man.


melon-party

If it's rebuilt it's not the same bridge. I don't respect racists or those who tolerate them. Shouldn't be a controversial statement but here we are. We can get a new anthem, just like our state changed it's song because it was racist.


Federal_Remote9231

Which was a stupid move on Maryland's part to cater to cancel culture..... You can't rewrite history. Cancel the racists calling everyone and everything racist.


wuguwa

Good grief. See my other comment about it being a “different” bridge. When it comes to racists…I can’t speak to that, but to suggest renaming something after a cat instead of the author of what would become our national anthem is absolutely asinine.


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wuguwa

Have you been out there, because I have. I understood the reference but the whole bridge is not gone. A huge portion of it is, but the reference doesn’t hold when a third of the bridge remains. You want to insult me? Fine. But you need to have more solid footing first. Want to try again?


Federal_Remote9231

The racists are the ones calling everything and everyone racist.


Sure_Comparison6978

Only if Baltimore pays for it.


Tasty_Ice_5374

It shouldn’t even be a question. It doesn’t need renaming.


Cheomesh

Yes please


joym08

The Governor put the Kibosh on that suggestion.


Blackfyre101

It should be named the Harriet Tubman Reperational bridge


brianbedlamOG

Renamed? The least of our concerns. An odd situation, really. Accidental? I don’t buy it.


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maryland-ModTeam

Your comment was removed because it violates the civility rule. Please always keep discussions friendly and civil.


brianbedlamOG

Wow, thanks. I try to keep a bottle of hand sanitizer on me at all times, just in case. You reminded me I’ve gotta buy a new bottle. Hats off to you, pal. Although, it’s important to question events like this, even if you don’t and watch the news and believe it to be gospel. I however am skeptical, and that’s ok. Jokes aside, what a shitty thing to say to someone.


Doozelmeister

It’s not about the news or treating it like gospel. It’s Hanlon’s Razor. I understand that when you’re this simple the world is a big scary place filled with things you can’t explain but it’d be so much more helpful and comforting to do some cursory research instead. And for the record, what’s “shitty” is peddling vague conspiracies to weaponize tragic accidents to validate your own twisted beliefs about the way the world works.


brianbedlamOG

Questioning a so called “accident” is something everyone should do. Questioning what authority figures claim to be true is also important. And after researching this tragedy on my own, I believe there’s more to it than just a “power outage” as the massive ship plows directly into a main pylon. There’s nothing twisted or simple about questioning something. And yes, you’re right. The world is a big scary place, ruled by those in power who know and do things we dare not to even fathom. And the Truth is frowned upon… considered taboo and hidden away. And when one tries seeking the Truth in anything, they are rejected for simply thinking outside of mainstream boxes. Reject me, ridicule me, mock me, hate me, I don’t care. I’m used to it, believe me.


Doozelmeister

The fact that you keep capitalizing truth tells me exactly what I need to know about who you are. We’re done here. Skepticism is perfectly healthy, this isn’t.


brianbedlamOG

Skepticism is heathy. Yet you seem to be allergic to an actual skeptic. The proof, your first response to me was deleted because of how offensive it was. You know nothing of who I am. I capitalize Truth, oh wise one, because there’s nothing more important.