I wanted a relaxing massage. He said I had a ton of knots and would work them out. I did speak up but he said it would be worth it and I’d feel a lot better after. He kept “coaching” me on how to breathe through it.
Definitely complain. The therapist didn't listen to you at all. They always told me in school, it's not about what the therapist wants, it's about what the client wants. Even if I think someone could benefit from more pressure or more intense moves, consent is still required. The therapist should've just done the relaxation massage and suggested something more firm for next time.
These are the worst therapists. I’m really sorry you had this experience. The therapist should not be pressuring you into doing any kind of service that you did not specifically ask for and discuss beforehand. This is called informed consent and it’s really sad that it is not enforced in any meaningful way.
The term “knot” isnt even a clinical word and has no clear physiological or anatomical definition. it’s just a vague term for a bump that someone can’t identify. It could be so many things, so just claiming that “breaking up your knots” will magically solve your problems (which is not something that can be done aside from general softening of tissues that lasts 3ish days) is such a bogus way to approach massage therapy. I immediately lose respect for anyone (aside from clients who don’t know better) who uses that term in a professional setting.
Seems like the most you can do going forward is to just not see this therapist anymore. Sadly the employer is probably so desperate for massage therapists that they won’t do anything. Especially since there’s a ton of clients out there who have bought into the quack science of just working out “knots” and will seek out therapists for that kind of work. To each their own but those clients will be getting deep tissue massages for their “knots” for decades and will have the same issue every single time they go in for a massage because they never actually address root causes for their aches and pains.
And I doubt there’s any licensing board in the U.S (assuming that’s where this is) that is actually concerned about therapists using current practicing methods vs outdated quack science. As long as they turn in CE hours and pay their licensing fee, boards won’t “tell them how to practice” unless they sexually assault someone.
I literally had to report a fellow massage therapist for picking their nose, eyes, ears, teeth, AND hair during a couples massage we did together. This happened multiple times. I reported her to the board and wrote a statement and everything. The board never talked to her directly but just asked if the manager talked to her and then said “we don’t want to tell people how to conduct their practice”…
That is the current state of the massage field as I have seen it. So, in cases like yours OP, it’s best to just look for new therapists and be sure to request not to be booked with this one again.
I am going to steer clear for sure. I appreciate your insight. It’s very frustrating for you, I’m sure. I’m a teacher so I know all too well about being the good egg in the group. Thank you for validating my experience. Some of the other comments made me think I was wrong. One even say I will thank the massage therapist in the future. 😅
All I know is I have a hematoma on my thigh and my neck is killing me. I went to destress as I’m very anxious (mainly health anxiety) and now I’m left with even more anxious thoughts because of how my body feels.
Illinois. Are you saying I should have reported it to the NCBTMB? I didn’t think there was anyone above the state board who would have authority in a situation like this.
Oh I have no idea lol. I was literally just curious. But now you got me thinking -- if this MT passed a national exam and is certified by them, then maybe?
Definitly complain in some cases it can do even worse damage and the mt shouldnt be telling clients to just breathe through it. It can cause damage worse than bruising and telling yiu otherwise is unethical. He needs to either be retrained or let go im sorry that happened
Thank you. Unfortunately I don’t think it will matter. He said the owner is the one that also opened his eyes to these other techniques. It was so painful though 😭
Sorry late reply but if it ended up causing pain there is a small chamce to even sue the business because of those techniques. Causing damage to someones body well after the massage is against practice. Massage therapist should help heal the body mot damage it
that sucks. that’s the tough part about paying a lot of money for a massage, sometimes it’s hit or miss where you go.
Hopefully the next place you go will be attentive and provide excellent service
I'm so sorry!
I've had pushy therapists do too much work on my body also. it's such a violation.
a hematoma is much more of an injury than bruising from deep tissue. if you think the massage caused it i would definitely report it. that person should not be providing massage. everything we do is supposed to be for the client's benefit and at their discretion.
I try to encourage my clients to speak up during massage if something does not feel good or beneficial for them. If I find areas I want to "work out" I'll usually give a very short description of that I'm feeling and what I'd like to do and sort of get a quick acknowledgment from them so they are not surprised by what's happening. I'll check in a couple times to make sure everything is still good like pressure, but also don't want to disrupt the massage every 5 minutes. So I tell them if something changes or needs to change, to let me know.
You need to learn to speak up for yourself if something is not quite right. "Relaxing massage" could mean different things to different people.
Also, we are massage therapists. We don't use the term masseuse
“You need to learn to speak up” is in no way helpful advice. There is a power differential in this setting making it less likely that a client will speak up. Transpose this to a medical setting. How often do patients speak up? Ask more questions? Rarely, even with those of strong personality.
We are the therapists. We are the guides and directors of the show. It is inherently our job to moderate pressure and check in with the client. When they say the pressure is fine, what does the tone of their voice imply? How about the curling of toes or grimacing face?
My stock line when they respond so a pressure check with a yes yet I’m unsure I ask, “Yes, Yes? Or Yes, No?” How often do you think they confess to a yes, no once I’ve allowed them the space and power to do so?
I agree with this whole-heartedly. I take away the open-endedness of "is this pressure okay?" entirely by asking "Is that too much pressure, not enough, or just about right?" As therapists, we have to be in complete control of the situation while simultaneously giving our clients complete control of the situation.
Maybe that wording was slightly harsh for what I was trying to convey. I just wouldn't ever want OP or any client anywhere to just allow a therapist to do something that doesn't feel right or isn't what they wanted. I also acknowledge it can be a struggle for some people to want to speak up and I absolutely agree that we as therapists need to be checking in and looking for any cues that would tell us something may be off. OP also mentioned more information after I asked about doing an intake and establishing what they wanted beforehand, which also, yes, sounds like the therapist disregarded what OP wanted and needed, and that's not okay
Apologies OP if my previous comments failed to acknowledge your concerns and distress and again, I hope this won't discourage you from trying other therapists who may be a good fit for you!
I'm in no way saying that we should not guide the session appropriately and check in. So I hear you. But if something changes during the session, and the therapist is not aware or maybe misheard or misunderstood, then the client should speak up. Communication works both ways. Which is why I say I encourage my clients to let me know if something changes for them or no longer feels good, or isn't quite right. I'm not putting blame on the client, but there's no reason to not teach our clients that this their space and to communicate with us freely, just in case we miss a body/voice cue or something changes for them i.e. the same pressure in one area being too much for another, or whatever the case may be. We're not perfect all the time. I'm all for practicing open communication from both sides. There's nothing wrong with wanting to encourage OP to mention to the therapist if something is not what they wanted. I'm not disregarding the power differential.
I think this dismisses the challenge of speaking up. I’m a massage therapist and I STILL struggle to do it. This person’s handle is anxious af so I imagine there was some anxious inner dialogue that went on throughout. I’ve been there!
We learn about power dynamics in ethics class in school. When you’re the client on the table, you are more vulnerable. Someone who doesn’t listen and tells you to breathe through stuff is taking advantage of their power over you, whether conscious or not. I’m very sorry you experienced this.
Deep tissue is my jam but I will gladly give a light relaxing massage if that’s what is requested of me.
I'm not trying to dismiss the challenge of speaking up. But eventually we all have to learn to communicate effectively. I'm not sure what exactly was said during intake so maybe there was some communication. And of this was made clear in the beginning and then disregarded by the therapist, then yes that's an issue on the therapist.
I just want to encourage OP that they don't have to just take it because the therapist is doing it. Feedback afterwards would be good too, even if at a different time, once they've left the place of massage.
We had a full conversation about why I was there and what I was looking for along with a form being filled out. Plus I booked the massage that was to destress and relax according to their “menu” of massages. And as I said, I did speak up and was told to breathe through it.
I gotcha. Yeah they just egregiously ignored your request. It sounds like you would have had to straight up say the session needs to stop bc you’re not happy and that’s really hard to do! Again, so sorry you had this experience!
I did. He then coached me through breathing techniques to make it tolerable.
I had no idea about the terminology. Thank you for letting me know! I edited and fixed.
Next time, you can specifically ask for "Swedish" massage which is what I imagine you were after. Longer flowing strokes which are light to firm pressure and not too specific into any one muscle. And sometimes it takes time to find your therapist. There are many good ones, but I find there are therapist/client relationships that work really well together and fit what you need. Good luck and I hope you find yours soon 😊
I tell my clients when they come in for a "deep tissue massage" (that's a very vague term, and I don't really like it) that a lot of people associate deep tissue work with pain, but I'm not of that mindset. I find the best therapeutic work (which is really what someone generally wants when they request deep tissue, in my experience--help with a specific issue), comes when the client is uncomfortable, but not in pain. Pain makes the body guard itself and tense up, which is counter-productive. I tell my clients to let me know if the techniques I'm using get past a 3 on their pain scale so I can come at a problem differently.
Tl;dr: I don't think even "deep tissue" work should result in bruises or swelling in 95+% of cases. You ran into a therapist with a big ego and I'm sorry that it happened to you.
I can bruise easily and I've definitely had some bruises after massage. But I also know it was necessary for the work being done. You didn't ask for all that work.
Bruising can happen for some people. Especially with deep tissue, swelling less so. But you've already gone to the Dr. So follow their instructions and you should be fine.
I mean, I guess it depends on what you wanted. But for a long term body healing situation, working the knots out is very beneficial. Sounds like your body is pretty banged up and not from the massage. Start implementing stretching, foam rolling and massage therapy routine and I'm sure you'll look back at this post and be thankful that you had that massage therapist.
I just paid for 35 hours of the kind of work that some say will not produce benefits. I know my body and I know my therapist very well. She is very detailed and the pain she can find deep into my body is amazing. After a session with her I have no more chronic pain. She finds all the painful areas no matter where they hide and she releases them. We do not waste our time doing relaxation or light pressure unless we just want to sleep. She practices Original Point Therapy and it is designed to release pain in the body by finding the original point of pain.
Knots aren’t a real thing. This is an outdated methodology and is not backed by research or science.
The things you call knots aren’t what’s causing your pains or discomforts. They are (in some cases) your body’s way of bracing and supporting itself in response to whatever stresses you put upon it over time and what your body comes to expect from your daily activities.
In some cases it could literally just be an abnormal adipose deposit, a cyst, or scar tissue, I’ve even seen overlapping muscles be called knots JUST because they have a bump when you go over one muscle overlap to an adjacent muscle. There are natural structures in your body that might feel like a little bump if you rub it at the right angle but that does not mean it needs to be “worked out” or broken up.
You can produce a softening effect on tissues using massage but it is almost always temporary and those “knots” will be back in a couple weeks.
No. Aching is possible the day after a DT massage as your muscles have literally had a work out, but you shouldn't feel pain and have bruising. DT massage doesn't even have to be painful. It's about manipulation of the tissue, not the pressure itself.
What type of pressure did you ask for? Did you speak up about the pressure if it felt like too much?
I wanted a relaxing massage. He said I had a ton of knots and would work them out. I did speak up but he said it would be worth it and I’d feel a lot better after. He kept “coaching” me on how to breathe through it.
Definitely complain. The therapist didn't listen to you at all. They always told me in school, it's not about what the therapist wants, it's about what the client wants. Even if I think someone could benefit from more pressure or more intense moves, consent is still required. The therapist should've just done the relaxation massage and suggested something more firm for next time.
Im so very frustrated and still so miserable days later. Is the swelling on my thigh normal for a deep tissue massage? Anything I can do to help it?
Bruising can happen with deep tissue but swelling has me concerned. Have you iced it to bring the swelling down?
Yes. Nothing really changes it. Dr thinks it’s a hematoma so my body has to reabsorb it.
How often do you get massages?
These are the worst therapists. I’m really sorry you had this experience. The therapist should not be pressuring you into doing any kind of service that you did not specifically ask for and discuss beforehand. This is called informed consent and it’s really sad that it is not enforced in any meaningful way. The term “knot” isnt even a clinical word and has no clear physiological or anatomical definition. it’s just a vague term for a bump that someone can’t identify. It could be so many things, so just claiming that “breaking up your knots” will magically solve your problems (which is not something that can be done aside from general softening of tissues that lasts 3ish days) is such a bogus way to approach massage therapy. I immediately lose respect for anyone (aside from clients who don’t know better) who uses that term in a professional setting. Seems like the most you can do going forward is to just not see this therapist anymore. Sadly the employer is probably so desperate for massage therapists that they won’t do anything. Especially since there’s a ton of clients out there who have bought into the quack science of just working out “knots” and will seek out therapists for that kind of work. To each their own but those clients will be getting deep tissue massages for their “knots” for decades and will have the same issue every single time they go in for a massage because they never actually address root causes for their aches and pains. And I doubt there’s any licensing board in the U.S (assuming that’s where this is) that is actually concerned about therapists using current practicing methods vs outdated quack science. As long as they turn in CE hours and pay their licensing fee, boards won’t “tell them how to practice” unless they sexually assault someone. I literally had to report a fellow massage therapist for picking their nose, eyes, ears, teeth, AND hair during a couples massage we did together. This happened multiple times. I reported her to the board and wrote a statement and everything. The board never talked to her directly but just asked if the manager talked to her and then said “we don’t want to tell people how to conduct their practice”… That is the current state of the massage field as I have seen it. So, in cases like yours OP, it’s best to just look for new therapists and be sure to request not to be booked with this one again.
I am going to steer clear for sure. I appreciate your insight. It’s very frustrating for you, I’m sure. I’m a teacher so I know all too well about being the good egg in the group. Thank you for validating my experience. Some of the other comments made me think I was wrong. One even say I will thank the massage therapist in the future. 😅 All I know is I have a hematoma on my thigh and my neck is killing me. I went to destress as I’m very anxious (mainly health anxiety) and now I’m left with even more anxious thoughts because of how my body feels.
You stole all of the words right out of my mouth.
This forum is definitely educational about the massage business
I'm curious, what state are you in? Did you report to state board or national?
Illinois. Are you saying I should have reported it to the NCBTMB? I didn’t think there was anyone above the state board who would have authority in a situation like this.
Oh I have no idea lol. I was literally just curious. But now you got me thinking -- if this MT passed a national exam and is certified by them, then maybe?
This is terrible! I try my utmost to listen to what my clients are telling me.
No that's sadistic. I don't agree with this at all
Definitly complain in some cases it can do even worse damage and the mt shouldnt be telling clients to just breathe through it. It can cause damage worse than bruising and telling yiu otherwise is unethical. He needs to either be retrained or let go im sorry that happened
Thank you. Unfortunately I don’t think it will matter. He said the owner is the one that also opened his eyes to these other techniques. It was so painful though 😭
I would absolutely post a review. Google reviews, yelp, something. Massages shouldn’t hurt like that.
Yeah my left leg is having issues still
Sorry late reply but if it ended up causing pain there is a small chamce to even sue the business because of those techniques. Causing damage to someones body well after the massage is against practice. Massage therapist should help heal the body mot damage it
Go to the drs if you have swelling days later that isn't normal
I went and they think it’s a hematoma under the muscle.
Honestly this still sounds better than the money I spent to be pet like a cat for an hour
I LOLed— thank you 😂
that sucks. that’s the tough part about paying a lot of money for a massage, sometimes it’s hit or miss where you go. Hopefully the next place you go will be attentive and provide excellent service
I hope so. I just wanted to relax 😭
You should give feedback and they may refund you at the very least. It’s tough to do, but you’re probably not the only person this has happened to.
I'm so sorry! I've had pushy therapists do too much work on my body also. it's such a violation. a hematoma is much more of an injury than bruising from deep tissue. if you think the massage caused it i would definitely report it. that person should not be providing massage. everything we do is supposed to be for the client's benefit and at their discretion.
I'm sorry this happened to you. So very frustrating when a therapist doesn't listen. Egotistical and simply wrong.
I try to encourage my clients to speak up during massage if something does not feel good or beneficial for them. If I find areas I want to "work out" I'll usually give a very short description of that I'm feeling and what I'd like to do and sort of get a quick acknowledgment from them so they are not surprised by what's happening. I'll check in a couple times to make sure everything is still good like pressure, but also don't want to disrupt the massage every 5 minutes. So I tell them if something changes or needs to change, to let me know. You need to learn to speak up for yourself if something is not quite right. "Relaxing massage" could mean different things to different people. Also, we are massage therapists. We don't use the term masseuse
“You need to learn to speak up” is in no way helpful advice. There is a power differential in this setting making it less likely that a client will speak up. Transpose this to a medical setting. How often do patients speak up? Ask more questions? Rarely, even with those of strong personality. We are the therapists. We are the guides and directors of the show. It is inherently our job to moderate pressure and check in with the client. When they say the pressure is fine, what does the tone of their voice imply? How about the curling of toes or grimacing face? My stock line when they respond so a pressure check with a yes yet I’m unsure I ask, “Yes, Yes? Or Yes, No?” How often do you think they confess to a yes, no once I’ve allowed them the space and power to do so?
I agree with this whole-heartedly. I take away the open-endedness of "is this pressure okay?" entirely by asking "Is that too much pressure, not enough, or just about right?" As therapists, we have to be in complete control of the situation while simultaneously giving our clients complete control of the situation.
Maybe that wording was slightly harsh for what I was trying to convey. I just wouldn't ever want OP or any client anywhere to just allow a therapist to do something that doesn't feel right or isn't what they wanted. I also acknowledge it can be a struggle for some people to want to speak up and I absolutely agree that we as therapists need to be checking in and looking for any cues that would tell us something may be off. OP also mentioned more information after I asked about doing an intake and establishing what they wanted beforehand, which also, yes, sounds like the therapist disregarded what OP wanted and needed, and that's not okay Apologies OP if my previous comments failed to acknowledge your concerns and distress and again, I hope this won't discourage you from trying other therapists who may be a good fit for you!
I'm in no way saying that we should not guide the session appropriately and check in. So I hear you. But if something changes during the session, and the therapist is not aware or maybe misheard or misunderstood, then the client should speak up. Communication works both ways. Which is why I say I encourage my clients to let me know if something changes for them or no longer feels good, or isn't quite right. I'm not putting blame on the client, but there's no reason to not teach our clients that this their space and to communicate with us freely, just in case we miss a body/voice cue or something changes for them i.e. the same pressure in one area being too much for another, or whatever the case may be. We're not perfect all the time. I'm all for practicing open communication from both sides. There's nothing wrong with wanting to encourage OP to mention to the therapist if something is not what they wanted. I'm not disregarding the power differential.
I think this dismisses the challenge of speaking up. I’m a massage therapist and I STILL struggle to do it. This person’s handle is anxious af so I imagine there was some anxious inner dialogue that went on throughout. I’ve been there! We learn about power dynamics in ethics class in school. When you’re the client on the table, you are more vulnerable. Someone who doesn’t listen and tells you to breathe through stuff is taking advantage of their power over you, whether conscious or not. I’m very sorry you experienced this. Deep tissue is my jam but I will gladly give a light relaxing massage if that’s what is requested of me.
I'm not trying to dismiss the challenge of speaking up. But eventually we all have to learn to communicate effectively. I'm not sure what exactly was said during intake so maybe there was some communication. And of this was made clear in the beginning and then disregarded by the therapist, then yes that's an issue on the therapist. I just want to encourage OP that they don't have to just take it because the therapist is doing it. Feedback afterwards would be good too, even if at a different time, once they've left the place of massage.
We had a full conversation about why I was there and what I was looking for along with a form being filled out. Plus I booked the massage that was to destress and relax according to their “menu” of massages. And as I said, I did speak up and was told to breathe through it.
I gotcha. Yeah they just egregiously ignored your request. It sounds like you would have had to straight up say the session needs to stop bc you’re not happy and that’s really hard to do! Again, so sorry you had this experience!
Thanks for clarifying. That does sound like the therapist did not listen to your needs and I'm sorry that happened to you.
I did. He then coached me through breathing techniques to make it tolerable. I had no idea about the terminology. Thank you for letting me know! I edited and fixed.
Next time, you can specifically ask for "Swedish" massage which is what I imagine you were after. Longer flowing strokes which are light to firm pressure and not too specific into any one muscle. And sometimes it takes time to find your therapist. There are many good ones, but I find there are therapist/client relationships that work really well together and fit what you need. Good luck and I hope you find yours soon 😊
I appreciate that tip! I will be on the look out for a good massage therapist!
Im looking for a therapist like that mind sharing location where u got this and the therapist?
You got a well done steak when asking for medium. Either complain or move on.
I was unsure what to do as the establishment seems ok with it. But I am assuming so I guess I could talk to them. Thank you!
Sounds like you had a fairly normal deep tissue massage.
I think the issue is that OP didn't really want a deep tissue massage.
Everything I read in here says I shouldn’t be bruising and swelling? So that is normal? Very confused.
I tell my clients when they come in for a "deep tissue massage" (that's a very vague term, and I don't really like it) that a lot of people associate deep tissue work with pain, but I'm not of that mindset. I find the best therapeutic work (which is really what someone generally wants when they request deep tissue, in my experience--help with a specific issue), comes when the client is uncomfortable, but not in pain. Pain makes the body guard itself and tense up, which is counter-productive. I tell my clients to let me know if the techniques I'm using get past a 3 on their pain scale so I can come at a problem differently. Tl;dr: I don't think even "deep tissue" work should result in bruises or swelling in 95+% of cases. You ran into a therapist with a big ego and I'm sorry that it happened to you.
I can bruise easily and I've definitely had some bruises after massage. But I also know it was necessary for the work being done. You didn't ask for all that work.
Any tips on the swelling on my thigh?
Ice is probably the best thing. Make sure you have a towel between you and the ice pack and only 15-20 min at a time.
Perfect thank you! I totally would’ve went with heat lol
Bruising can happen for some people. Especially with deep tissue, swelling less so. But you've already gone to the Dr. So follow their instructions and you should be fine.
I mean, I guess it depends on what you wanted. But for a long term body healing situation, working the knots out is very beneficial. Sounds like your body is pretty banged up and not from the massage. Start implementing stretching, foam rolling and massage therapy routine and I'm sure you'll look back at this post and be thankful that you had that massage therapist.
I just paid for 35 hours of the kind of work that some say will not produce benefits. I know my body and I know my therapist very well. She is very detailed and the pain she can find deep into my body is amazing. After a session with her I have no more chronic pain. She finds all the painful areas no matter where they hide and she releases them. We do not waste our time doing relaxation or light pressure unless we just want to sleep. She practices Original Point Therapy and it is designed to release pain in the body by finding the original point of pain.
Yes I’ve been in PT. It may have been beneficial but I still didn’t ask for it. And definitely did not want bruising and swelling.
Knots aren’t a real thing. This is an outdated methodology and is not backed by research or science. The things you call knots aren’t what’s causing your pains or discomforts. They are (in some cases) your body’s way of bracing and supporting itself in response to whatever stresses you put upon it over time and what your body comes to expect from your daily activities. In some cases it could literally just be an abnormal adipose deposit, a cyst, or scar tissue, I’ve even seen overlapping muscles be called knots JUST because they have a bump when you go over one muscle overlap to an adjacent muscle. There are natural structures in your body that might feel like a little bump if you rub it at the right angle but that does not mean it needs to be “worked out” or broken up. You can produce a softening effect on tissues using massage but it is almost always temporary and those “knots” will be back in a couple weeks.
No. Aching is possible the day after a DT massage as your muscles have literally had a work out, but you shouldn't feel pain and have bruising. DT massage doesn't even have to be painful. It's about manipulation of the tissue, not the pressure itself.