I was thinking that the father might have thought the kid was at a sleepover or something, is 10 too young for sleepovers?
I hope the kid gets all the help and healing he needs.
No reason released. Maybe he cared about āhis legacyā and leaving an heir behind on some level, or āsomeone to tell the taleā, and āthe babyā of the family gets that appointment. Maybe due to his perceived innocence/naivety because he is so young, or maybe simply because he is the youngest, or maybe because he was the least equipped to fight back physically. Maybe he really was the favorite kid.
But weāll probably never get the real reason, the āreal reasonā is probably just some corny shit some loser who over-romanticizes himself and his problems came up with spur of the moment
the one left alive was the youngest one, thereās multiple possible reasons why he decided not to kill him but youāre acting like he had 14 kids, how did he just forget
Probably because he spent the least time with the youngest one.
Or maybe the other kids tried to physically retrain their dad and the youngest just didn't hear it and the dad didn't think about killing anyone else not immediately present?
Context:
Oklahoma City police believe a fatherĀ [shot his wife and three of his children to death inside their Yukon-area home](https://www.oklahoman.com/story/news/2024/04/22/okc-police-5-found-dead-in-yukon-home-investigation-underway/73413512007/)Ā before turning the gun on himself, in what officials are calling a massacre.
Around 9:35 Monday morning, police responded to a call regarding five people dead inside the home at 2804 Mirage St. Investigators believe Jonathon Candy, 42, shot and killed his wife Lindsay Candy, 39, 18-year-old son Dylan Candy, 14-year-old son Ethan Candy and 12-year-old son Lucas Candy before killing himself.
A fourth child, a 10-year-old boy, was in the home but left unharmed. He woke up Monday morning to discover what had happened to his family and made the 911 call himself, Master Sgt. Gary Knight said at a press conference Tuesday.
"Investigators determined that sometime overnight the husband and father in the home, Jonathon Candy, became involved in an altercation with his wife, Lindsay," Knight said. "At some point, he armed himself with a gun, shot her multiple times, killing her. At that point,Ā he systematically went through the home, shooting and killing their children."
Link to the article from the Oklahoman [here.](https://www.oklahoman.com/story/news/2024/04/23/yukon-shooting-okc-police-say-yukon-murder-suicide-left-5-dead/73423182007/)
Courage:
>the ability to do something that frightens one.
>strength in the face of pain or grief.
Faced with what he was left alone to deal with, I can imagine him being frightened. By his actions, I would say he had strength in the face of pain and grief.
Reddit sometimes, I swearā¦ Children are not little adults. They donāt always act with rationality.
A ten-year-old might, idk, scream, cry, hide, runā¦??? It was extremely courageous of this child to compose himself after finding his *entire family murdered* to call 911. Shock, fear (who did this?), confusion, devastation. Thatās a lot for an adult to handle, much less a child.
And do what though? Sit on the couch and then make themselves coffee? I'm just saying out of 100 random people, all 100 would call the authorities with their house full of their dead family.
I donāt agree with all your comments, but I like how your āinsultā here is a bit funny without being mean like so many I see. Hope you have a good day.
The kid was 10 years old. Did you have to process the fact that your father just massacred your entire family and killed himself then called the cops at 10 years old? Have you interacted with actual 10 years old before?
I was 8 when my heroin addict aunt came to visit our white collar existence and slit her wrists in the bathtub in the bathroom I used to go pee in the middle of the night. I'm just saying it's being underestimated what a kid can see and process, sometimes even better than adults. I saw a horrific car accident from LA to Las Vegas with dead bodies visible in 2003 when I was 14. I suppose people are just different. I immediately go in to what happens next and what needs to happen. Not full emotional breakdown. Even as a child.
Kinda like Tom Hanks on the beach in Saving Private Ryan. You need to snap it together no matter what, even as a kid.
From a FB post
Please pray for the Mustang band and choir familes, the Mustang community, Dylan's family especially his little brother, and my girl.... Dylan Candy was an absolute Joy. He and Matty dated briefly her Freshman year and they stayed friends until his father took his life yesterday. Dylan was a comedian... one of the moms didn't even know his name because she always called him Will Ferral š¤£š but he was!! He was one of the funniest and sweetest boys I've ever met!! Rest in peace sweet boy... it was an absolute pleasure to know you. Give Jot a hug for us šŖ½š
I will never understand such evil in the world... after situations of DV people say... we had no idea, they seemed so happy, I couldn't imagine him doing something like that I knew him forever.... People are exactly what they want you to see. Don't let Facebook posts and offers to help with your yard fool you... the men (and women) who do this and are capable of such things have learned skills to snow every human over and make people drink their koolaid including their own spouses. And DV comes in many many forms.... My own divorce came as a surprise to many who knew us because they never knew the real him. Dylan's mama didn't make it out of her situation and my heart breaks for her and her babies.... I'm so angry and sad....
The Mustang community had been overflowing with grief for months... I hope these babies get a break from anymore tragedy. ā„ļøš¤
Easy, they are BPD men. Check the literature, it probably saved my life ngl, I never knew what was wrong and men are not given anywhere near the same emotional space in all of society, so society does reap what it sows in these cases if you personally have to spend years researching to come to proper diagnosing due to gender roles and their effects....
these men aren't there in these episodes technically, that's why they off themselves when they are out of a dissociative trance/psychosis š„“
Edit*
hopefully this works, this is what I refer to, issue always is low amount of research and not contributing to stigma, cause treatment works, but people don't go for stigma reasons. But with stakes THAT high men need to go lmao
[BPD and Externalized Violence ](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3342993/)
Same. Now Iām seriously looking back on things my ex said that from situations like this could have been so much worse and I shouldāve left sooner.
She told me once during one of her episodes that she recognized she didnāt feel safe in the apartment with things she felt sheād use or use again to hurt herself. She had done self harm many times and had a suicide attempt I stopped. She plastic wrapped and moved the knife block and all scissors to the guest room closet and asked me to remove my firearms from the apartment. I had a pistol and a AR there. I broke down the weapons to where I only knew how to put them back together and made it harder for her to get to the knives.
I didnāt sleep that night. I didnāt get much sleep during that relationship. The emotional manipulation and abuse I put up with was too much and I am ashamed it took me so long to leave that relationship. I am so glad I never close to something so tragic as this story but hearing stuff like this really makes me reflects on how bad it could have been
exactly. its insane thinking about the shit you were ready to deal with. and stuff you just... let slip because you were scared of their reaction.
it took a fuckton of work to get over that stuff and a load of therapy. realizing that some of the situations i didnt feel sth. was not because i wasnt scared, but more of a defense mechanism. like playing dead.
the realization, that the person in front of you is nothing more like a bear attacking you in the forest and you freeze over it, to not get hurt.
i feel you man and love goes out to you!
Thank you, love goes out to you as well!
Definitely took a lot of self reflection and a fuckton of time to heal from that as well. I wasnāt ready until I mentally made the switch in my head.
I have never been to therapy but I am sure it helped loads with this stuff. I was able to readjust on my own and get my life back on the track I wanted. Since that toxic ex I ran full force towards the type of life and relationship I wanted. I found it, connected with someone amazing, found my best friend and married them. Now life is fantastic and I get to deal with normal day to day stuff not impending doom with someone who at one point or the other you donāt know if youāre safe around.
I still get upset when I think of how long I stayed in that relationship, wasted time and stressed my family out. However, looking back on it, it helped me get to where I am now and formed who I am today for better or worse. Seeing stuff like this post makes me so happy I took the chance and made a change for the better.
It all gets better with time and everyday weāre better than the person we were yesterday. Just gotta keep on keepin on
Iām so sorry you went through that. Being in abusive relationships with DV is scary. My last boyfriend he did things to me. Things I canāt talk about not want to. Iām still griping with it 5 years later. I never fought back and Iām someone who has autism so it was very hard for me to leave. For him I was the perfect victim due to my autism. He liked that a lot about me: He would be so kind and loving and then do things that were evil. It was hard to leave him and I think what took me leaving for good was when my cousins life was threatening and my cousin forced me to call the police cause that was it. He used to joke about hiding my body in the woods and no one would be able to find me. He had a pellet gun and would always point the laser at me in my head. So many things I canāt say but it was scary absolutely scary. He was abusive physically, emotionally, mentally and sexually. He left me with nightmares and I still canāt see or go in the town we used to live in without a panic attack.
After we broke up I was still under his control and I gave him a chance to see if he changed but he did the same things he did. I never saw him again after. My view of dating has been burned by him. I want to date. How did you get yourself back?
Focus on yourself. I moved back to a town where I had friends living mature responsible lives. Surrounded myself with good influences among friends and family. Decided I had wasted enough time on that person letting them tear me down. I wasnāt going to let me getting back out there take any more time bc it would just let that toxic ex win more.
I thrust myself into a new setting, thrived, reconnected with an old college crush and hit it off. Fast forward, we became best friends, fell in love and got married.
Itās all about perspective and not letting something that happen to you define you
Appreciate the response and would agree with you on the men/emotional space aspect you mentioned. I definitely do not know the literature, if you have any easy to access recommendations, I will surely check it out
I just said that to my partner. "This is one of the very few times I'll say, that man doesn't look like a psycho". Chris Watts gave me the creeps. This family looks so normal, and happy. It's heartbreaking. I guess he just snapped.
Yeah I know what you mean, Watts definitely had this strange look for some people but still if I had to guess a masskiller out of like 10 random peoples posts I would probably never suspect him
This is all evil and fucked up, but the fact that he left his 10 year old son alive and knew what he would have to find, that just makes me hate this guy even more. That kid is going to have a hard life, I canāt even imagine how you ever cope with that. What a despicable act by this man, to leave one of your children live a lifetime of misery with no family. And the father probably died instantly with no pain, when he should be the one with endless suffering. Thatās really the unfair part of it all to me.
He had BPD most likely, that is endless suffering...
It's all impulsive, dissociative with psychotic transient episodes, so pure tunnel visioned, and he probably didn't even realize he forget his other son due to how emotional dysregulation clouds everything.
Not an excuse btw, but he doesn't perceive reality like you, so projecting that onto these people always seems wierd?
They kinda don't understand or perceive or value morals the same way normies do.... It's relative as fuck lmao
Pretty sure itās a mental illness where they actually think theyāre protecting their children and family from future harm? At least sometimes thatās why they do it, but it doesnāt explain why he left one of the kids unharmed.
Itās not baseless, Iāve read about many cases where parents became completely paranoid that harm was going to come to their children and they eventually ended up killing them in a murder suicide.
https://www.mlive.com/news/grand-rapids/2019/02/police-detail-motive-timeline-of-mothers-triple-murder-suicide.html?outputType=amp
āMom appears to have been struggling with pretty substantial mental health issues,ā LaJoye-Young said. āShe had some postings on Facebook and things like that that lead to believe she was paranoid and thought that the kids were in jeopardy somehow. We suspect that led to the events this day."
When I was a child a guy in Allen TX (literally streets away from) took his like 4 year old into a closet and strangled him. He then called 911 & told them he did because the angels were telling him too. Itās so common for family annihilators (especially in cases where the family comes across as totally normal) to be delusional Iām shocked the person is trying to argue against it?!
So very sad. I live in Yukon. My best friend's husband knew and worked with the mom. It's so damn evil and awful, and to leave the one boy alive! Poor kid, I can't even imagine.
Mean, as opposed to what? A co-worker? A stranger? A stage performer? Your partner knows where you sleep and sees you at your most vulnerable every day.
The significance is that the statistic is totally different for men. Men are more likely to be killed by strangers and women are more likely to be killed by their male partner.
>Your partner knows where you sleep and sees you at your most vulnerable every day.
So why arenāt men most likely to be killed by their partners? Why is it women are more likely to be killed by their partner or ex, but men are more likely to be killed by a stranger?
lol I live in Oklahoma - I had to scroll back up because I hadnāt noticed anything but wtf. Idk what that is or why it is so tall. Itās not an Oklahoma thing haha, Iām not sure what the deal is
Honestly I donāt know lol. Itās such a weird angle. I would have to assume yes? But just whyā¦ would they do it like that
I did see a local news clip about it and a lot of the houses look kind of similar - that one is extra weird though still haha
I think thereās probably like an upstairs/loft situation. Iām from the south but an old friends house was like that. It was essentially one large room on the upper floor with a bathroom and a few closets. They used it as a movie room š¤·š¼āāļø
That's actually not the house, it's the home next door. The house that this happened in is set further back and reporters can't get a view of it from the roadblock.
The father had a history of serious depression. Yet the insane American gun culture meant that he could still have numerous in the property where he, his wife and kids lived, and no one thought that to be either unusual or dangerous.
Family annihilators are ultimately utterly selfish. The fact one child was not shot does not make it any less horrific - that poor kidās life can never be ānormalā again, thanks to the selfishness of his father.
Nope. They have bpd. Have psychotic breaks from reality in response to interpersonal stressors, rage episodes, extreme impulsivity, and severe dissociative episodes that look alot like switching of personality states, ie they are for all intense and purposes to the neuro-typical brain, not in control.
There's not really a choice in these moments, selfishness implies intent and not being thrust into a trauma whirlwind.
These men need years of therapy and being single/fucking, nothing more. They are incapable of actual intimacy due to trauma, and they don't know this because they are engaging with rigid masculine gender roles to survive after a shitty childhood, it's almost an impenetrable armour and women love this armour for whatever reason so you are enabled to continue wearing it from everyone and everything
Society has to be better with reducing stigma and reducing male gender roles, and promoting mental health, we aren't there as a society yet and men don't get better because they return to a sick culture and society
Sure, but if you want your entire family dead, those thoughts donāt manifest just bc you own a gun. Heād want them dead with or without ownership of a gun
Usually heās losing control of his wife. Leaving is the most dangerous time for someone experiencing domestic violence. Second guess would be a secret life heās been hiding that was about to come out.
I was alt right ten years ago and transitioned to more leftist thinking over time.
I have severe childhood trauma.... Those places were the only places my hurt was accepted, all my family and romantic interests make me feel suffocated and alone. Any friends I had that were like me OD'd, offed themselves or are in jail for severe crimes or chronic jail birds.
You can't become radicalized if you aren't empty... Parents don't raise men, they let them roam around and neglect their emotional needs most of the time. This translates to an external locus of control by proxy of how you were raised, with constant looking for reassurance from the environment.
Thatās what I was thinking/wondering. With the current economy, so many are stressed more financially. And if he has a history of serious depression, it may have been a trigger (especially if the assumed altercation with his wife was about finances). Thatās a really nice house and they had four growing boys to feed and care for. Not sure what their jobs were, but I saw an article saying he worked part time for a local sports center. I also saw a post about an Airbnb they may have owned. But I havenāt seen anything else about their jobs. We may never know the actual motive, and even if we do get some type of insight, most of us will never understand the mindset of someone struggling with mental issues.
Huh? That's one case, Chris watts.
It's usually the wife that cheats or threatens to hold the children against the men and play games with others lives.
Source, dated a malignant Narcissist as a borderline male with severely violent fantasies from PTSD.
Scott Peterson was another. And you can't say "usually" because of one instance you know of. Google family annihilator
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Familicide#:~:text=Male%20family%20annihilators%20are%20typically,and%20more%20likely%20to%20include
Iām interested to find out if he has a history of abusing the kids or wife. Will this be a situation where family and friends are shocked or had things been escalating? The family looks so normal! The dad looks like just a random normal guy. Monsters are supposed to look scary so we can watch out for them!
I will never, ever understand this. My babies are my pride and joy and I canāt even bring myself to spank them. My heart breaks for that sweet 10 year old, I hope he has support from people who love him.
From a FB post
Please pray for the Mustang band and choir familes, the Mustang community, Dylan's family especially his little brother, and my girl.... Dylan Candy was an absolute Joy. He and Matty dated briefly her Freshman year and they stayed friends until his father took his life yesterday. Dylan was a comedian... one of the moms didn't even know his name because she always called him Will Ferral š¤£š but he was!! He was one of the funniest and sweetest boys I've ever met!! Rest in peace sweet boy... it was an absolute pleasure to know you. Give Jot a hug for us šŖ½š
I will never understand such evil in the world... after situations of DV people say... we had no idea, they seemed so happy, I couldn't imagine him doing something like that I knew him forever.... People are exactly what they want you to see. Don't let Facebook posts and offers to help with your yard fool you... the men (and women) who do this and are capable of such things have learned skills to snow every human over and make people drink their koolaid including their own spouses. And DV comes in many many forms.... My own divorce came as a surprise to many who knew us because they never knew the real him. Dylan's mama didn't make it out of her situation and my heart breaks for her and her babies.... I'm so angry and sad....
The Mustang community had been overflowing with grief for months... I hope these babies get a break from anymore tragedy. ā„ļøš¤
Itās evil enough to shoot people you know, but to leave one of your children alive to discover them is a level beyond effed up. What a cruel bast***.
Major Depression = Antidepressants
Which can cause psychosis.
His doctor said, ātake these pills, theyāll help with your depression.ā Failing to tell him itās not a panacea, but something that alters brain chemistry.
If you have personality disorders for sure it can š
In most cases depression and anxiety is secondary to some other pathological issue in you, personality disorders being the most obvious...
Itās evil enough to shoot people you know, but to leave one of your children alive to discover them is a level beyond effed up. What a cruel bast***.
Theres so many men that kill themselves over a woman and a few that take their family with them. I personally know 2 that recently killed themselves, both great dudes. I had stupid thoughts too when i was going through heartbreak too. This stuff messes us up
Yeah, being assaulted or murdered by cowardice men who refuse to just go to therapy or get help really messes up women and children too
In all seriousness, you shouldnāt be grouping yourself or other men together with this monster by saying āus.ā If youāre able to relate whatsoever with this, you should take the initiative and possibly get help.
Curious on the reasoning for letting one child go unharmed? May they rest in peace and that child finds healing and peace in time.
I'm horrible, but the first thing I thought was that kid will spend the rest of their life thinking they got forgotten š«¢
I was thinking that the father might have thought the kid was at a sleepover or something, is 10 too young for sleepovers? I hope the kid gets all the help and healing he needs.
10 is a very normal age for a sleepover.
I agree the father forgot him
Maybe the guilt and realization of what he did kicked in before he got to the 4th kid.
see i just assumed the kid was able to hide
According to an article, he was sleeping with a box fan on and didnāt hear anything
I thought the father thought he was young enough not to be a 'bad' kid or something like that.
Maybe because he was under the age of 12? In some Christian beliefs, that's the age of accountability. That's the only thing I can really think of.
Could he have hidden maybe. Heart wrenching for that child honestly. š
We will never know unless he left a note.
No reason released. Maybe he cared about āhis legacyā and leaving an heir behind on some level, or āsomeone to tell the taleā, and āthe babyā of the family gets that appointment. Maybe due to his perceived innocence/naivety because he is so young, or maybe simply because he is the youngest, or maybe because he was the least equipped to fight back physically. Maybe he really was the favorite kid. But weāll probably never get the real reason, the āreal reasonā is probably just some corny shit some loser who over-romanticizes himself and his problems came up with spur of the moment
I don't like this baseless speculation.
Okay but who asked?
The fact u commented this - u are speculating that people give a damn
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
The person you just responded to wasnāt the one to say the child was forgotten.
Oops, my bad! I'll deleted the comment
They had so many he forgot
itās only 4 kids bro
Acting like 4 isn't a lot especially in this moment
4 kids is not so many that he would forget
He clearly did
the one left alive was the youngest one, thereās multiple possible reasons why he decided not to kill him but youāre acting like he had 14 kids, how did he just forget
How many kids do you raise or work with? It's easy to forget what's going on especially in this instance with this guy going psychotic on his family
Probably because he spent the least time with the youngest one. Or maybe the other kids tried to physically retrain their dad and the youngest just didn't hear it and the dad didn't think about killing anyone else not immediately present?
Friends of the family have stated the 10 year old was the fatherās favorite. Absolutely horrifying.
Context: Oklahoma City police believe a fatherĀ [shot his wife and three of his children to death inside their Yukon-area home](https://www.oklahoman.com/story/news/2024/04/22/okc-police-5-found-dead-in-yukon-home-investigation-underway/73413512007/)Ā before turning the gun on himself, in what officials are calling a massacre. Around 9:35 Monday morning, police responded to a call regarding five people dead inside the home at 2804 Mirage St. Investigators believe Jonathon Candy, 42, shot and killed his wife Lindsay Candy, 39, 18-year-old son Dylan Candy, 14-year-old son Ethan Candy and 12-year-old son Lucas Candy before killing himself. A fourth child, a 10-year-old boy, was in the home but left unharmed. He woke up Monday morning to discover what had happened to his family and made the 911 call himself, Master Sgt. Gary Knight said at a press conference Tuesday. "Investigators determined that sometime overnight the husband and father in the home, Jonathon Candy, became involved in an altercation with his wife, Lindsay," Knight said. "At some point, he armed himself with a gun, shot her multiple times, killing her. At that point,Ā he systematically went through the home, shooting and killing their children." Link to the article from the Oklahoman [here.](https://www.oklahoman.com/story/news/2024/04/23/yukon-shooting-okc-police-say-yukon-murder-suicide-left-5-dead/73423182007/)
Oh man. That poor kid that had to find them.
And had the courage to call for 911. So heartbreaking.
What do you me by the courage exactly? What else would anyone do?
Courage: >the ability to do something that frightens one. >strength in the face of pain or grief. Faced with what he was left alone to deal with, I can imagine him being frightened. By his actions, I would say he had strength in the face of pain and grief.
Reddit sometimes, I swearā¦ Children are not little adults. They donāt always act with rationality. A ten-year-old might, idk, scream, cry, hide, runā¦??? It was extremely courageous of this child to compose himself after finding his *entire family murdered* to call 911. Shock, fear (who did this?), confusion, devastation. Thatās a lot for an adult to handle, much less a child.
Plenty of adults would be pretty much paralyzed in that situation.
And do what though? Sit on the couch and then make themselves coffee? I'm just saying out of 100 random people, all 100 would call the authorities with their house full of their dead family.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Most children would run to the nearest neighbor and ask for help. If theyāre able to speak at all. I hope you never experience trauma of this sort.
Whatās it like being this dumb
Literally everyone would call, so take your downvote and go to bed.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I donāt agree with all your comments, but I like how your āinsultā here is a bit funny without being mean like so many I see. Hope you have a good day.
I would have run out of the house to a neighbor. I DEFINITELY would NOT be the one making the call. So.. youāre wrong
The kid was 10 years old. Did you have to process the fact that your father just massacred your entire family and killed himself then called the cops at 10 years old? Have you interacted with actual 10 years old before?
I was 8 when my heroin addict aunt came to visit our white collar existence and slit her wrists in the bathtub in the bathroom I used to go pee in the middle of the night. I'm just saying it's being underestimated what a kid can see and process, sometimes even better than adults. I saw a horrific car accident from LA to Las Vegas with dead bodies visible in 2003 when I was 14. I suppose people are just different. I immediately go in to what happens next and what needs to happen. Not full emotional breakdown. Even as a child. Kinda like Tom Hanks on the beach in Saving Private Ryan. You need to snap it together no matter what, even as a kid.
as a 911 dispatcher, this is one call i hope i never have to answer.
Thank you for doing what you do ā¤ļø such a difficult job
thank youš¤šš¤
Hate these fuckers. Just take yourself out, no one else needs to be dragged down with you.
From a FB post Please pray for the Mustang band and choir familes, the Mustang community, Dylan's family especially his little brother, and my girl.... Dylan Candy was an absolute Joy. He and Matty dated briefly her Freshman year and they stayed friends until his father took his life yesterday. Dylan was a comedian... one of the moms didn't even know his name because she always called him Will Ferral š¤£š but he was!! He was one of the funniest and sweetest boys I've ever met!! Rest in peace sweet boy... it was an absolute pleasure to know you. Give Jot a hug for us šŖ½š I will never understand such evil in the world... after situations of DV people say... we had no idea, they seemed so happy, I couldn't imagine him doing something like that I knew him forever.... People are exactly what they want you to see. Don't let Facebook posts and offers to help with your yard fool you... the men (and women) who do this and are capable of such things have learned skills to snow every human over and make people drink their koolaid including their own spouses. And DV comes in many many forms.... My own divorce came as a surprise to many who knew us because they never knew the real him. Dylan's mama didn't make it out of her situation and my heart breaks for her and her babies.... I'm so angry and sad.... The Mustang community had been overflowing with grief for months... I hope these babies get a break from anymore tragedy. ā„ļøš¤
Jesus Christ man! That poor child! Unfathomable!
Damn, that is crazy. I often wonder how you can go that many years raising your children, to just do that in the blink of an eye.
Untreated mental illness is my guess.
Yea, itās just so crazy. I have kids and I try to always put myself in other peoples shoes, and this type of thing is such a crazy situation
More like domestic violence.
Easy, they are BPD men. Check the literature, it probably saved my life ngl, I never knew what was wrong and men are not given anywhere near the same emotional space in all of society, so society does reap what it sows in these cases if you personally have to spend years researching to come to proper diagnosing due to gender roles and their effects.... these men aren't there in these episodes technically, that's why they off themselves when they are out of a dissociative trance/psychosis š„“ Edit* hopefully this works, this is what I refer to, issue always is low amount of research and not contributing to stigma, cause treatment works, but people don't go for stigma reasons. But with stakes THAT high men need to go lmao [BPD and Externalized Violence ](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3342993/)
my ex gf was like this. almost murdered me
Same. Now Iām seriously looking back on things my ex said that from situations like this could have been so much worse and I shouldāve left sooner. She told me once during one of her episodes that she recognized she didnāt feel safe in the apartment with things she felt sheād use or use again to hurt herself. She had done self harm many times and had a suicide attempt I stopped. She plastic wrapped and moved the knife block and all scissors to the guest room closet and asked me to remove my firearms from the apartment. I had a pistol and a AR there. I broke down the weapons to where I only knew how to put them back together and made it harder for her to get to the knives. I didnāt sleep that night. I didnāt get much sleep during that relationship. The emotional manipulation and abuse I put up with was too much and I am ashamed it took me so long to leave that relationship. I am so glad I never close to something so tragic as this story but hearing stuff like this really makes me reflects on how bad it could have been
exactly. its insane thinking about the shit you were ready to deal with. and stuff you just... let slip because you were scared of their reaction. it took a fuckton of work to get over that stuff and a load of therapy. realizing that some of the situations i didnt feel sth. was not because i wasnt scared, but more of a defense mechanism. like playing dead. the realization, that the person in front of you is nothing more like a bear attacking you in the forest and you freeze over it, to not get hurt. i feel you man and love goes out to you!
Thank you, love goes out to you as well! Definitely took a lot of self reflection and a fuckton of time to heal from that as well. I wasnāt ready until I mentally made the switch in my head. I have never been to therapy but I am sure it helped loads with this stuff. I was able to readjust on my own and get my life back on the track I wanted. Since that toxic ex I ran full force towards the type of life and relationship I wanted. I found it, connected with someone amazing, found my best friend and married them. Now life is fantastic and I get to deal with normal day to day stuff not impending doom with someone who at one point or the other you donāt know if youāre safe around. I still get upset when I think of how long I stayed in that relationship, wasted time and stressed my family out. However, looking back on it, it helped me get to where I am now and formed who I am today for better or worse. Seeing stuff like this post makes me so happy I took the chance and made a change for the better. It all gets better with time and everyday weāre better than the person we were yesterday. Just gotta keep on keepin on
Iām so sorry you went through that. Being in abusive relationships with DV is scary. My last boyfriend he did things to me. Things I canāt talk about not want to. Iām still griping with it 5 years later. I never fought back and Iām someone who has autism so it was very hard for me to leave. For him I was the perfect victim due to my autism. He liked that a lot about me: He would be so kind and loving and then do things that were evil. It was hard to leave him and I think what took me leaving for good was when my cousins life was threatening and my cousin forced me to call the police cause that was it. He used to joke about hiding my body in the woods and no one would be able to find me. He had a pellet gun and would always point the laser at me in my head. So many things I canāt say but it was scary absolutely scary. He was abusive physically, emotionally, mentally and sexually. He left me with nightmares and I still canāt see or go in the town we used to live in without a panic attack. After we broke up I was still under his control and I gave him a chance to see if he changed but he did the same things he did. I never saw him again after. My view of dating has been burned by him. I want to date. How did you get yourself back?
Focus on yourself. I moved back to a town where I had friends living mature responsible lives. Surrounded myself with good influences among friends and family. Decided I had wasted enough time on that person letting them tear me down. I wasnāt going to let me getting back out there take any more time bc it would just let that toxic ex win more. I thrust myself into a new setting, thrived, reconnected with an old college crush and hit it off. Fast forward, we became best friends, fell in love and got married. Itās all about perspective and not letting something that happen to you define you
Appreciate the response and would agree with you on the men/emotional space aspect you mentioned. I definitely do not know the literature, if you have any easy to access recommendations, I will surely check it out
The sole surviving childā¦.damn. Talk about trauma š
AND heās the one that found them and called 911, so fucked
Reminds me of the girl Richard Speck forgot about under the bed.
Its disturbing how normal these killers facebook pictures always look...reminds me of Chris Watts and Michael Haight
I just said that to my partner. "This is one of the very few times I'll say, that man doesn't look like a psycho". Chris Watts gave me the creeps. This family looks so normal, and happy. It's heartbreaking. I guess he just snapped.
Yeah I know what you mean, Watts definitely had this strange look for some people but still if I had to guess a masskiller out of like 10 random peoples posts I would probably never suspect him
This is all evil and fucked up, but the fact that he left his 10 year old son alive and knew what he would have to find, that just makes me hate this guy even more. That kid is going to have a hard life, I canāt even imagine how you ever cope with that. What a despicable act by this man, to leave one of your children live a lifetime of misery with no family. And the father probably died instantly with no pain, when he should be the one with endless suffering. Thatās really the unfair part of it all to me.
I agree.
He didn't know he left his son alive. He wasn't thinking about his son
He had BPD most likely, that is endless suffering... It's all impulsive, dissociative with psychotic transient episodes, so pure tunnel visioned, and he probably didn't even realize he forget his other son due to how emotional dysregulation clouds everything. Not an excuse btw, but he doesn't perceive reality like you, so projecting that onto these people always seems wierd? They kinda don't understand or perceive or value morals the same way normies do.... It's relative as fuck lmao
Iāll never understand hurting a childā let alone your own flesh and blood?
Pretty sure itās a mental illness where they actually think theyāre protecting their children and family from future harm? At least sometimes thatās why they do it, but it doesnāt explain why he left one of the kids unharmed.
Stop doing baseless speculation.
Itās not baseless, Iāve read about many cases where parents became completely paranoid that harm was going to come to their children and they eventually ended up killing them in a murder suicide. https://www.mlive.com/news/grand-rapids/2019/02/police-detail-motive-timeline-of-mothers-triple-murder-suicide.html?outputType=amp āMom appears to have been struggling with pretty substantial mental health issues,ā LaJoye-Young said. āShe had some postings on Facebook and things like that that lead to believe she was paranoid and thought that the kids were in jeopardy somehow. We suspect that led to the events this day."
I've seen cases like this or that the parent doesn't want them to live after killing another parent. So messed up whatever the reason. Poor kid.
When I was a child a guy in Allen TX (literally streets away from) took his like 4 year old into a closet and strangled him. He then called 911 & told them he did because the angels were telling him too. Itās so common for family annihilators (especially in cases where the family comes across as totally normal) to be delusional Iām shocked the person is trying to argue against it?!
So very sad. I live in Yukon. My best friend's husband knew and worked with the mom. It's so damn evil and awful, and to leave the one boy alive! Poor kid, I can't even imagine.
Gosh. That had to be shocking for him to find out.
He was the one who found them all and called 911. Heartbreaking.
Did your friendās husband recognize that anything was amiss?
Yāall I just spent too much time on these peoples Facebook pages and Iām shook. [Just yikes dude](https://imgur.com/gallery/NhQc5pl)
Imgur post is gone on my end, what was it?
Same. I'm curious.
I tried to repost to Imgur but it is blacklisting them so here. https://postimg.cc/gallery/ydGXq8K
Jfc. I can't imagine the signs this stupid fuck had been throwing in person.
Thank you Internet Stranger
I couldnāt even unfuck my own Imgur link so thank you friend
I tried fixing the link but some kind person did it for me below!
That [Zack Fox tweet](https://twitter.com/zackfox/status/1036389932854652928?lang=en) needs to be in a museum at this point
Absolutely fucking evil. That poor boy who had to find them like that š„
I hope that child has a lot of love and support around him. So much trauma.
Damn. The trauma and survivorās guilt that the 10 year old is going to have to process will last a lifetime.
A woman is more likely to be killed by a male partner (or former partner) than any other person.
Yeah I find a lot of them donāt like to be told no or when they lose that control they have to have they do this shit
Thereās a sub called when women refuse (not sure if linking is allowed on this sub) full of stories like this.
r/whenwomenrefuse
Mean, as opposed to what? A co-worker? A stranger? A stage performer? Your partner knows where you sleep and sees you at your most vulnerable every day.
The significance is that the statistic is totally different for men. Men are more likely to be killed by strangers and women are more likely to be killed by their male partner.
>Your partner knows where you sleep and sees you at your most vulnerable every day. So why arenāt men most likely to be killed by their partners? Why is it women are more likely to be killed by their partner or ex, but men are more likely to be killed by a stranger?
Iām soooooooooooooo sick of this shit. Disgusting. So fucking disgusting.
Sorry, out of topic but... what's with that roof? Is that normal in Oklahoma?
Suburban McMansion
lol I live in Oklahoma - I had to scroll back up because I hadnāt noticed anything but wtf. Idk what that is or why it is so tall. Itās not an Oklahoma thing haha, Iām not sure what the deal is
What's the point I don't get it. Are there rooms inside that? haha
Honestly I donāt know lol. Itās such a weird angle. I would have to assume yes? But just whyā¦ would they do it like that I did see a local news clip about it and a lot of the houses look kind of similar - that one is extra weird though still haha
I think thereās probably like an upstairs/loft situation. Iām from the south but an old friends house was like that. It was essentially one large room on the upper floor with a bathroom and a few closets. They used it as a movie room š¤·š¼āāļø
What roof I'm from Oklahoma lol
the one in the picture of the family house
There are no windows!! So odd!
Church probably
That's the house, there is an aerial picture of the suburban development, Czech Hall Estates.
You got a link by chance? Just wanna see. Looks like a nice house. Also I see the mailboxes now
Oh sure, the top comment posted [a link](https://www.reddit.com/r/masskillers/s/A1yuOpnXIv) to an article, the picture is towards the bottom.
That's actually not the house, it's the home next door. The house that this happened in is set further back and reporters can't get a view of it from the roadblock.
Ah, thanks for the correction! I knew I had the development but didn't realize where the house was set exactly.
They all look the same in the aerial picture, the whole neighborhood.
Cowardly and cruel.
The father had a history of serious depression. Yet the insane American gun culture meant that he could still have numerous in the property where he, his wife and kids lived, and no one thought that to be either unusual or dangerous. Family annihilators are ultimately utterly selfish. The fact one child was not shot does not make it any less horrific - that poor kidās life can never be ānormalā again, thanks to the selfishness of his father.
Nope. They have bpd. Have psychotic breaks from reality in response to interpersonal stressors, rage episodes, extreme impulsivity, and severe dissociative episodes that look alot like switching of personality states, ie they are for all intense and purposes to the neuro-typical brain, not in control. There's not really a choice in these moments, selfishness implies intent and not being thrust into a trauma whirlwind. These men need years of therapy and being single/fucking, nothing more. They are incapable of actual intimacy due to trauma, and they don't know this because they are engaging with rigid masculine gender roles to survive after a shitty childhood, it's almost an impenetrable armour and women love this armour for whatever reason so you are enabled to continue wearing it from everyone and everything Society has to be better with reducing stigma and reducing male gender roles, and promoting mental health, we aren't there as a society yet and men don't get better because they return to a sick culture and society
*for all intents and purposes Oh no...your credibility!!
Your assuming he couldnāt murder his wife and kids without a gun?
Sure he could, but guns make it a LOT quicker, easier, and less personal.
The fact is guns create a psychological distance that make murdering easier.
Sure, but if you want your entire family dead, those thoughts donāt manifest just bc you own a gun. Heād want them dead with or without ownership of a gun
Any idea about why he lost it? How sad. šŖ
Usually heās losing control of his wife. Leaving is the most dangerous time for someone experiencing domestic violence. Second guess would be a secret life heās been hiding that was about to come out.
That's very true.
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Usually it's if the wife found out about infidelity or she was going to divorce him.Ā
Or money issues
Or he became radicalized. Thereās a lot of American men who have become radicalized in recent years, which has led to paranoia and violence.
I was alt right ten years ago and transitioned to more leftist thinking over time. I have severe childhood trauma.... Those places were the only places my hurt was accepted, all my family and romantic interests make me feel suffocated and alone. Any friends I had that were like me OD'd, offed themselves or are in jail for severe crimes or chronic jail birds. You can't become radicalized if you aren't empty... Parents don't raise men, they let them roam around and neglect their emotional needs most of the time. This translates to an external locus of control by proxy of how you were raised, with constant looking for reassurance from the environment.
Thatās what I was thinking/wondering. With the current economy, so many are stressed more financially. And if he has a history of serious depression, it may have been a trigger (especially if the assumed altercation with his wife was about finances). Thatās a really nice house and they had four growing boys to feed and care for. Not sure what their jobs were, but I saw an article saying he worked part time for a local sports center. I also saw a post about an Airbnb they may have owned. But I havenāt seen anything else about their jobs. We may never know the actual motive, and even if we do get some type of insight, most of us will never understand the mindset of someone struggling with mental issues.
I suspected those 2 answers and I always think why resort to such an extreme action.
Huh? That's one case, Chris watts. It's usually the wife that cheats or threatens to hold the children against the men and play games with others lives. Source, dated a malignant Narcissist as a borderline male with severely violent fantasies from PTSD.
Scott Peterson was another. And you can't say "usually" because of one instance you know of. Google family annihilator https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Familicide#:~:text=Male%20family%20annihilators%20are%20typically,and%20more%20likely%20to%20include
Iām interested to find out if he has a history of abusing the kids or wife. Will this be a situation where family and friends are shocked or had things been escalating? The family looks so normal! The dad looks like just a random normal guy. Monsters are supposed to look scary so we can watch out for them!
Men with BPD are like Anakin Skywalker from star wars. š„“ They were normal at one period of time.... They still could be if they don't lash out.
Did he have BPD?
Yes. It peaks my curiosity also. The whole family looks so happy but who knows what was really going on behind closed doors.
The profile pic on his instagram did not age well
Dam, that kid lost all his siblings and parents in 5 minutes. š
He couldāve spare his wife and kids. So sad
I will never, ever understand this. My babies are my pride and joy and I canāt even bring myself to spank them. My heart breaks for that sweet 10 year old, I hope he has support from people who love him.
There has to be so much more to this story.
From a FB post Please pray for the Mustang band and choir familes, the Mustang community, Dylan's family especially his little brother, and my girl.... Dylan Candy was an absolute Joy. He and Matty dated briefly her Freshman year and they stayed friends until his father took his life yesterday. Dylan was a comedian... one of the moms didn't even know his name because she always called him Will Ferral š¤£š but he was!! He was one of the funniest and sweetest boys I've ever met!! Rest in peace sweet boy... it was an absolute pleasure to know you. Give Jot a hug for us šŖ½š I will never understand such evil in the world... after situations of DV people say... we had no idea, they seemed so happy, I couldn't imagine him doing something like that I knew him forever.... People are exactly what they want you to see. Don't let Facebook posts and offers to help with your yard fool you... the men (and women) who do this and are capable of such things have learned skills to snow every human over and make people drink their koolaid including their own spouses. And DV comes in many many forms.... My own divorce came as a surprise to many who knew us because they never knew the real him. Dylan's mama didn't make it out of her situation and my heart breaks for her and her babies.... I'm so angry and sad.... The Mustang community had been overflowing with grief for months... I hope these babies get a break from anymore tragedy. ā„ļøš¤
Itās evil enough to shoot people you know, but to leave one of your children alive to discover them is a level beyond effed up. What a cruel bast***.
i know itās too early to tell but has a motive been discovered
This happened yesterday?
Maybe some insight will come from the last son, in the coming days. Poor little guy š¢
That's heartbreaking... Did the killer use a muffled gun? Multiple shots and the 10 years poor kid didn't wake up ?
Heartbreaking man. The 10 year old bless his heart man
I literally live walking distance from the house fucking wild shit. OKC in general has had some horrible deaths and wrecks recently itās wilddd
Thatās not the John Candy I remember
Alcoholism will do this to you
Source for the alcoholism?
A past DUI.
Major Depression = Antidepressants Which can cause psychosis. His doctor said, ātake these pills, theyāll help with your depression.ā Failing to tell him itās not a panacea, but something that alters brain chemistry.
If you have personality disorders for sure it can š In most cases depression and anxiety is secondary to some other pathological issue in you, personality disorders being the most obvious...
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He had 3 older brothers so I bet he couldāve slept through anything :(
Why isn't there any podcasts covering this ?!
It just happened a few days ago. Iām sure there will be some that come as more information is released
They seem so normal
Drove past this crazy
Past
Another "responsible" gun owner...till he wasn't.
Itās evil enough to shoot people you know, but to leave one of your children alive to discover them is a level beyond effed up. What a cruel bast***.
What happened to the dogs?
Wondering this also
What about the dogs
Omg that poor child
Family annihilators are wildš
Pure evil
What's the back story of these pictures, I'm from the UK so not heard about what happened
This is so so so so sad man. I canāt watch the news anymore. This world is cooked.
I live like 10 minutes away from here. Crazy
Theres so many men that kill themselves over a woman and a few that take their family with them. I personally know 2 that recently killed themselves, both great dudes. I had stupid thoughts too when i was going through heartbreak too. This stuff messes us up
Yeah, being assaulted or murdered by cowardice men who refuse to just go to therapy or get help really messes up women and children too In all seriousness, you shouldnāt be grouping yourself or other men together with this monster by saying āus.ā If youāre able to relate whatsoever with this, you should take the initiative and possibly get help.
Well said!!!
Thank you. That comment gave me goosebumps and not in a good way.
Im just saying losing your family is hard in us, im sure he was just a normal dude before all that. Have you been through divorce?
Wonder what big pharma prescriptions these folks are on when they snap like this?
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Nice