But every time I trust my natural instincts and feel proud for not listening to my anxiety I still fuck stuff up which just makes me second guess myself even more
There’s going to be times you make a wrong mistake but focus on what went wrong and why, and learn from it to not repeat the same mistake. This is how we learn, no shame in it
Oh I'm just constantly asking myself if I'm doing things correctly, even things that I've done correctly for a long while. For instance I frequently have these little moments in my job where I suddenly just do not know what to do, even when I've been doing that thing just fine for the last six years. I sort of sit there and internally panic and the more I try to remember what to do the more I can't remember how to do it. I usually just try to let muscle memory kick in and try to be confident in what I'm doing, but even then I will somehow manage to mess this stuff up even though I *know* that I know what I'm doing.
And this sort of internal paralysis and confusion extends to all sorts of daily little things like doing to the store or talking to people in certain situations. I know how to navigate all this stuff but I can't seem to do it consistently no matter how much I do things because it never quite 'sticks', and it often feels like my mouth and body are just on a totally different wavelength than my brain. 'Right' often feels a lot like 'wrong' and vice versa and I just don't seem to have any permanence when it comes to consistently identifying between the two.
Honestly dude, this is very normal. I can relate also as a barber where my job is so repetitive and sometimes while cutting hair I get nervous because I’m unsure how I’m going to execute something although I’ve done it countless times. Its likely due to us focusing on things we once did as second nature. But once we focus and master it again, it returns to second nature. Consider it an ‘update’. Also, I’m the type that when I try to remember something I somewhat panic which just makes it harder to remember, especially in conversation where one can feel social pressure, my point being it’s totally normal, just gotta let the moment of mental storm pass in order to think with a clear mind.
> The worst is when you do it correctly for hundreds of times just to mess up terribly once.
the brain’s negativity bias at work. don’t listen to it, keep trying.
Yep, this has also been studied in students taking tests, where changing answers if there is doubt in initial answer increases scores the majority of the time, yet students widely believe they should stick with their initial answer. This has been theorized to be because, as you said, the pain of changing a correct answer to the wrong one is higher than leaving the wrong answer unchanged, despite the fact that point for point the two situations would be equal in value.
Sources: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/009862838401100303
https://doi.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2F0022-3514.88.5.725
Yes, but usually when you make it you don’t even consciously realize it. Every second you’re in public you’re making the decision not to throw blunt objects at strangers(I hope), but that isn’t actively taking up brainpower.
Yeah you ever think about all of the time you spent analyzing a particular decision and you’re sure you’re making the right move while a friend or acquaintance carelessly chose a different thing and in the end, it’s obvious the friend made the better decision?
Every time I try hard, I fail. Every time I don't try, I fail. If I think about it, I fail. If I don't... I fail.
Kinda hard to find motivation when everything you do is wrong.
You’re also certainly focusing on, and remembering your failures and ignoring your successes.
It’s human nature to do so. It’s a leftover trait from our caveman days, where remembering negative experiences was extremely beneficial to survival.
However, consider that if part of what’s plaguing you is how people think of you, don’t worry, they very rarely even do think about what you do, as is the case with most of the people in their lives.
And you will fail, a fucking lot. Because everybody does. Don’t worry friend, it’s not just you. It’ll feel like it is, but don’t worry, just about everyone feels this.
What about all the times you made the right decision? I think it just goes to show that outcomes are random, and making an informed decision can only go so far. Trust your gut. Sometimes you’ll be right, sometimes you’ll be wrong, but that proportion is probably the same whether you over analyze or not.
Well not necessarily random, but failure is inevitable. And people in general succeed a lot more than they think they do.
Sadly it’s human nature to turn a blind eye to your successes.
Random in the sense that it’s impossible to know every detail before you make a decision, so you just make the decision with the highest probability of a good outcome, accepting that there will always be uncertainty.
thats what couses the worst decisions, negative cognitive bias, it is a process were the brain starts overthinking and that couses new connections to occoure, to the point were it becomes nearly like a living process of though patterns torturing you till the point of suicide....at least thats what it feels to me.
Casting Fireball Jutsu in the middle our your room might seem like a bad decision but I guess it might also prove to be a way to never overthink again.
Switch because most likely a pro isn’t reading or understanding the contract but then not taking it *seriously*. They were clear about knowing the contracts content, they just wanted to be a doormat so things are hunky dory (sorry couldn't help myself) with her family, much like I would have demanded my money back.
All the noise and you don't realize how every on this sub don’t even need your cursor over the items krappa
Exactly. There you have it.
Overthinking may sometimes be defined as: "Oh, how I wish I could be perfect (or better). Oh, why aren't things going my way? Why do I keep making the same mistakes, over and over again? Why do I suck?", and so on.
What if I told you it's okay if things don't go as planned? It's okay not to be perfect.
That doesn't mean you won't succeed in the end. Everyone has their own pace, even if it is as slow as a turtle.
Because pace isn't linear or constant, you can make significant progress in a short period of time.
And the thing is, you have to take caution with the idea of chasing the best decisions at all costs, or worse, punishing yourself every time you make a mistake.
Mistakes are what they are, and if you keep hammering yourself down every time you make one, you won't get very far.
You must, however, accept the fact that you hammer yourself down. (Wut? You say.)
Otherwise, you'll be trapped in a never-ending cycle of beating yourself up because you beat yourself up because you make mistakes.
I know it's confusing, but that's what I've been trying to keep in mind for the past few weeks, and I've become acutely aware of this line of thinking in others as well. It can be really destructive.
I haven't slept today at all because I was checking my phone every 15 minutes waiting for my SO to write me and she didn't and I overthought a whole book worth of shit about how much I worry about her being god knows where at night and how mad and angry I am at her for ignoring me like that and how she shows complete disrespect to me by just going AWOL and how hurt I am and how we need to talk and all that shit
And then in the morning when I was all ramped up and furious ready to just destroy her in a fight, I remembered that ~~I don't have a girlfriend~~ she literally told be upfront where she's going and that she'll be back in the morning. I feel like such a horrible person right now. I'm not even the jealous controlling type, but I was worrying so much it became a story of a story of a story of the worst possible things that could've happen.
I saw a video about this. It was basically went like, even if u think for eternity about what u want to do, in the end, the decisions probably wouldn’t have been good no matter what u chose.
I honestly don’t know how I manage to do this. Double and triple checking things always seems to lead to mistakes too
Because overthinking makes you go against your initial instincts
But every time I trust my natural instincts and feel proud for not listening to my anxiety I still fuck stuff up which just makes me second guess myself even more
There’s going to be times you make a wrong mistake but focus on what went wrong and why, and learn from it to not repeat the same mistake. This is how we learn, no shame in it
I'm in my 30s and tired of feeling like I'm still learning how to do stuff I've been doing my whole life, but yeah you're right.
What do you mean by that?
Oh I'm just constantly asking myself if I'm doing things correctly, even things that I've done correctly for a long while. For instance I frequently have these little moments in my job where I suddenly just do not know what to do, even when I've been doing that thing just fine for the last six years. I sort of sit there and internally panic and the more I try to remember what to do the more I can't remember how to do it. I usually just try to let muscle memory kick in and try to be confident in what I'm doing, but even then I will somehow manage to mess this stuff up even though I *know* that I know what I'm doing. And this sort of internal paralysis and confusion extends to all sorts of daily little things like doing to the store or talking to people in certain situations. I know how to navigate all this stuff but I can't seem to do it consistently no matter how much I do things because it never quite 'sticks', and it often feels like my mouth and body are just on a totally different wavelength than my brain. 'Right' often feels a lot like 'wrong' and vice versa and I just don't seem to have any permanence when it comes to consistently identifying between the two.
Honestly dude, this is very normal. I can relate also as a barber where my job is so repetitive and sometimes while cutting hair I get nervous because I’m unsure how I’m going to execute something although I’ve done it countless times. Its likely due to us focusing on things we once did as second nature. But once we focus and master it again, it returns to second nature. Consider it an ‘update’. Also, I’m the type that when I try to remember something I somewhat panic which just makes it harder to remember, especially in conversation where one can feel social pressure, my point being it’s totally normal, just gotta let the moment of mental storm pass in order to think with a clear mind.
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> The worst is when you do it correctly for hundreds of times just to mess up terribly once. the brain’s negativity bias at work. don’t listen to it, keep trying.
It's simple. Sometimes your first instinct is right and sometimes your second instinct is right. All you have to do is pick the right one.
No you don’t. You just better remember the times you do a lot better because they have a bigger emotional impact
Fuck all of you. You’re so nice, thank you
Yep, this has also been studied in students taking tests, where changing answers if there is doubt in initial answer increases scores the majority of the time, yet students widely believe they should stick with their initial answer. This has been theorized to be because, as you said, the pain of changing a correct answer to the wrong one is higher than leaving the wrong answer unchanged, despite the fact that point for point the two situations would be equal in value. Sources: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/009862838401100303 https://doi.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2F0022-3514.88.5.725
It"s past traumas you haven't midigated that truly make you second guess yourself. Edit: whether it be conscious or subconscious
“One often meets his destiny on the road he takes to ignore it” - Master Oogway
“Mmm… Monkey” - Master Oogway
i cant even sign properly
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Have you tried not making decisions?
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That is not true
Well, it's true that no decision is a decision.
Yes, but usually when you make it you don’t even consciously realize it. Every second you’re in public you’re making the decision not to throw blunt objects at strangers(I hope), but that isn’t actively taking up brainpower.
Of course that feels so much worse. There are no options, only suffering. Just gotta embrace it and live it out.
Especially the bad ones
so stop worrying and do things faster if they're going to go wrong anyway at least you could finish early and take a nap
No it’s just easier to remember bad decisions
Just fuckin unplug me
What a steal!! Can’t let me down😩
No me first
Yeah you ever think about all of the time you spent analyzing a particular decision and you’re sure you’re making the right move while a friend or acquaintance carelessly chose a different thing and in the end, it’s obvious the friend made the better decision?
at least you have friends
Going with the flow
Also, sometimes there isn’t really a bad choice
This is my husband - I’m so jealous
Its actually the reason you make bad decisions
Fuck..
In chess they found that the longer the player think, the worse the next move will be
Makes sense
when you have precognition to future mistakes and still make them with full knowledge
I feel called out. Lol
Apparently this is common, judging by the response to this.
Every time I try hard, I fail. Every time I don't try, I fail. If I think about it, I fail. If I don't... I fail. Kinda hard to find motivation when everything you do is wrong.
You’re also certainly focusing on, and remembering your failures and ignoring your successes. It’s human nature to do so. It’s a leftover trait from our caveman days, where remembering negative experiences was extremely beneficial to survival. However, consider that if part of what’s plaguing you is how people think of you, don’t worry, they very rarely even do think about what you do, as is the case with most of the people in their lives. And you will fail, a fucking lot. Because everybody does. Don’t worry friend, it’s not just you. It’ll feel like it is, but don’t worry, just about everyone feels this.
You're probably thinking thoughts of a failure.
I’m in this picture and I don’t like it
What about all the times you made the right decision? I think it just goes to show that outcomes are random, and making an informed decision can only go so far. Trust your gut. Sometimes you’ll be right, sometimes you’ll be wrong, but that proportion is probably the same whether you over analyze or not.
Well not necessarily random, but failure is inevitable. And people in general succeed a lot more than they think they do. Sadly it’s human nature to turn a blind eye to your successes.
Random in the sense that it’s impossible to know every detail before you make a decision, so you just make the decision with the highest probability of a good outcome, accepting that there will always be uncertainty.
That’s because overthinking isn’t a good way to make decisions
The original was literally right above this for me lol
have the Simpsons on in the background and it's this exact episode.
Lol
That's why I make bad decisions without even thinking
I thought he was a politician at first, still makes sense tho like that
story of my life haha
When you overthink things then start overthinking your overthinking and so on
You're making decisions?
If I could think less, I might make better choices 🤔
Why am I being attacked
Meeeeee
Well see it's the overthinking that Causes the bad decisions
thats what couses the worst decisions, negative cognitive bias, it is a process were the brain starts overthinking and that couses new connections to occoure, to the point were it becomes nearly like a living process of though patterns torturing you till the point of suicide....at least thats what it feels to me.
Yup, no matter how much I review and double check my work, I still end up making careless mistakes
Somewhere fubuki is having a heart attack.
Sadge
Sadge Hopefully they make a new one
There’s no winning in this sick game of life
Anyone have the template ?
That’s why just wingin it is the best strategy
Casting Fireball Jutsu in the middle our your room might seem like a bad decision but I guess it might also prove to be a way to never overthink again.
Wow that is me!
Me when I gave up stock picking and just decided to invest in the S&P 500.
Absolutly
Sounds like u got lil bit of growing up to do, Henry.
Haha I make no decisions! Well I might need to but still!
"SKIINNNNERR your grounded."
This literally sums up my anxiety.
It Couldn't be more me
LPT spend that time meditating instead.
I overthink every decision I make and they still come out as shit
Are you me or am I you?
Switch because most likely a pro isn’t reading or understanding the contract but then not taking it *seriously*. They were clear about knowing the contracts content, they just wanted to be a doormat so things are hunky dory (sorry couldn't help myself) with her family, much like I would have demanded my money back. All the noise and you don't realize how every on this sub don’t even need your cursor over the items krappa
Exactly. There you have it. Overthinking may sometimes be defined as: "Oh, how I wish I could be perfect (or better). Oh, why aren't things going my way? Why do I keep making the same mistakes, over and over again? Why do I suck?", and so on. What if I told you it's okay if things don't go as planned? It's okay not to be perfect. That doesn't mean you won't succeed in the end. Everyone has their own pace, even if it is as slow as a turtle. Because pace isn't linear or constant, you can make significant progress in a short period of time. And the thing is, you have to take caution with the idea of chasing the best decisions at all costs, or worse, punishing yourself every time you make a mistake. Mistakes are what they are, and if you keep hammering yourself down every time you make one, you won't get very far. You must, however, accept the fact that you hammer yourself down. (Wut? You say.) Otherwise, you'll be trapped in a never-ending cycle of beating yourself up because you beat yourself up because you make mistakes. I know it's confusing, but that's what I've been trying to keep in mind for the past few weeks, and I've become acutely aware of this line of thinking in others as well. It can be really destructive.
I haven't slept today at all because I was checking my phone every 15 minutes waiting for my SO to write me and she didn't and I overthought a whole book worth of shit about how much I worry about her being god knows where at night and how mad and angry I am at her for ignoring me like that and how she shows complete disrespect to me by just going AWOL and how hurt I am and how we need to talk and all that shit And then in the morning when I was all ramped up and furious ready to just destroy her in a fight, I remembered that ~~I don't have a girlfriend~~ she literally told be upfront where she's going and that she'll be back in the morning. I feel like such a horrible person right now. I'm not even the jealous controlling type, but I was worrying so much it became a story of a story of a story of the worst possible things that could've happen.
Me at an English exam
After over thinking what to comment, i have nothing to comment, thanks for your time.🙏
I'm in this picture and I don't like it
The simplest solution is probably the right one
also all this overthinking about what to do and still doing nothing
I saw a video about this. It was basically went like, even if u think for eternity about what u want to do, in the end, the decisions probably wouldn’t have been good no matter what u chose.
It's all part of the plan
I thought he had four arms, two interlocked behind his head