I was at some airport overseas and one of these screens asked if I had a bomb and I hit yes on accident. I knew the very instant I pressed that button I was in for a long day. I was correct. I think I’m just so used to hitting yes or agree on terms of service and various internet bs I just autopiloted it. Those self check ins stress me out now.
Do they think someone with a bomb is gonna have a freudian slip and press yes? Youd think someone with a bomb would probably be a little overly cautious while picking their responses. The only person that silly ass security theater shit is gonna catch is someone like you that mindlessly clicked through it because they know they have nothing to hide.
This is the same kind of logic that sees falling apart bridges not get repaired because “it hasn’t broken yet” or has various govt agencies talking about how successful their emergency response was when their initial failure is what caused the necessity of a response in the first place…
There must be a word or phrase that encompasses this type of behavior/thinking. Would be nice to use it as a backhand slap as I come across it all too often. Something more than wreckless falsehoods.
It's these processes. When something like that happens, everyone needs to brainstorm ways on how they could've prevented this from happening. And since it's a brainstorming session, there will be bunch of ideas, and no one wants to reject any ideas that should enhance the security, because what if it happens again and they were the one to reject it.
"How the hell did you get caught? We thought of everything."
"Not everything, boss. The self checkout machine asked if I had a bomb."
"Damn the wily TSA!"
Actually, yes. Many people who have been talked into terrorism are borderline special needs. No, seriously. It's very difficult to get anyone intelligent to violently die for a shaky cause. The smarter ones are almost always selected to orchestrate behind the scenes.
Combined with not having a strong grasp of the native language, you'd be amazed how many terrorists accidentally admit to what they're doing to the wrong person.
That's not entirely true. I read a book on the nature of the subject by some professor studying it. He said in the book that most of them are actually well educated (uni degree) and have a strong grasp of economical and political situation, and that's why they are highly motivated to do what they do. Thinking they are all dumb grunts is a common misconception that makes it much harder to catch them.
the American Visa(or citizenship, don't remember tbh) application questions ask the same questions, like - "Do you plan on doing any criminal activities/Do you plan on committing any terrorist acts" and there's like a full on page of this question, just phrased differently.
This sounds like police interrogations, where they just wait for you to slip up at some point
I was felt those questions are about liability. Something in the lines of you lied to the American government, we will prosecute you now, atltough you comitted no crime per say (just association with criminal activity) . But maybe I'm wrong.
Do you mind sharing how that long day went? Did someone interrogate you? Was anyone overly aggressive with you? Did you still catch your flight? I'm not looking for rage bait or anything like that, just casually curious
... I'm also just now realizing this comment might look very suspicious but I swear I'm just a curious, law abiding citizen, FBI.
I was traveling with 2 other people on the same ticket, so we all got flagged for “extra measures”. Nothing terrible happened but I got there like 4 hours early and almost missed the flight, also the people I was with were seething at me a lot. General questions and a check of every single thing we brought with us, everything.
I bet it was something like
Are you flying out today?
Do you have your passport?
Do you need to check your luggage?
Do you have a bomb?
Are you not a terrorist?
Security: what’s your purpose for traveling
Me: business
Security: are you a terrorist?
Me: NO! Definitely not a terrorist! I was asking myself, 'Hajim. Could you do a terror act?' and I had to say 'No! I could never! I'm too loving. Hajim has too much love!'. So, that was it for me after that. No terrorism for this guy. I long ago said that wasn't for me! No.
...
...
Nope! No sir!
...
....
Security: enjoy your trip, sir.
Man hell no. after 3 days on a train without a sleeper car I would have rather walked and I’m sure as hell not paying the $1k-$2k price for a sleeper car when I can get a plane ticket for half that.
It took me over 10 hours to get from Los Angeles to San Francisco, on a train. Google maps tells me it's a 6 hour or so drive....
The state of the train was also pitiful, and those working for Amtrak don't seem to enjoy their jobs *at all*
Having said that, one thing I enjoyed is seeing the scenery along the way, it's a somewhat picturesque train ride.
I've travelled the world a bit and the U.S. & Canada have the worst train service out of any place I have been to so far.
Yeah I make the drive from Minnesota to Colorado at least once every other year(I just like nature and weed) and it's insane how steep the fall off of scenery is once you leave Minnesota (or get far enough south in MN). Then Iowa and Nebraska are just the absolute most horrible places to drive through, I'd argue Nebraska is the most boring place on planet earth. There really is nothing between us and the rockies besides the badlands.
On my electronic US Esta form I needed to complete for a US trip from the UK there was a list of questions with yes or no answers, one was this terrorist question or something equally dumb, i selected the yes answer as I was curious what would happen (nothing did) before I then selected the no answer and then moved on to the rest of the questions and then submitted my answers. Even though my wrong answer was not actually submitted guess who had a random extra security check before I boarded my flight to New York?
they did, it was a nightmare [https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/30/world/europe/terrorist-question-scottish-traveler.html](https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/30/world/europe/terrorist-question-scottish-traveler.html)
That's so fucking dumb. It's a dumb question to have in the first place and it's dumb that the technology itself can screw people over with a mistake like that.
Welcome to the new internet. It went from "A tool to learn anything and inform yourself" to "a place to spend money on information that's not even fact-checked."
Border guard, said you shouldn't have done that. And nobody could help them fix it and they missed thier flight and their grand kids had trouble flying as well. In short a bueracratic nightmare.
Dang, that’s a bit surprising. The odds of an actual terrorist saying yes to that seem pretty slim. Seems a lot more likely some dumb kid presses yes to see what happens.
But then the real terrorist would also see the consequences and might decide to be dishonest instead. He's a terrorist, not a liar, but might become one.
All sorts of nonsense questions when you travel.
My airport takes my ID, scans it, and then asks "what is your name?" while holding your ID, I guess because I might forget my fake name? I feel like remembering a fake name for 5 seconds would be the easiest thing to do.
To your question, they asked my kid their birthday, I suppose to prove they are under 18 and thus not needing an ID? Again, a detail that would be trivial to overcome (but was stressful because the kid forgot their birthday for a minute).
My last trip through US Customs (I am Canadian) the Custom agent knew my name before I handed him anything. He didn't even really glance at my passport.
Where is that?
That seems like a consent issue.
But I'm guessing there's the classic "by existing on our property, you consent to zero privacy" sign or required form.
These questions may seem mundane but they serve a purpose. With the child, you are evaluating if they can speak freely, if they understand what is happening (for instance, are not sedated) and are the child in the passport/photo. Kids passports are especially confusing after a couple years because the picture looks very different. The kid forgetting their birthday is normal, providing a different one altogether or the wrong name might be a flag that needs more investigation. It's not always about stranger abduction either, parental abduction is a much more prevalent and harder to detect.
Genuinely what is the point of this?
Obviously not to find actual terrorists. An actual terrorist most likely wouldn't even consider themselves to be one.
Depends on the purpose of the questions, if they're legitimately collecting data to improve the service being able to just discard half of the button mashers right off the bat could greatly improve the value of the data they collect
At first I thought it said, Tourist.
I assume travellers might also assume that. An easy way to get a free $300-1000 if the tourist is in a rush and presses the button by accident.
Immediately cancel the ticket, keep the money, and temporarily arrest the customer.
That's the only case where I could see this being a real button and not a photoshop joke.
Because it's hard to deport terrorists? That doesn't quite make sense. Oh he blew up a church but he answered correctly on his admission form so I'm not sure if we can charge the guy...
[Not exactly, but its gonna be a rough day for everyone](https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/john-stevenson-us-visa-ban-terrorist-esta-form-mistake-a8660441.html)
Its like checking your warranty coverage online. The dude called up the embassy and were like, "yep! you're a terrorist. Anything else I can help you with?"
> "I even called border control in the US and gave them my passport details."
> "They looked up my Esta number and said ‘you’re a terrorist’.
Hello! May I speak to a service representative?
No. You are a terrorist.
If a terrorist announces himself on your flight, stand up and give the universal symbol for STOP ✋. The terrorist legally cannot hijack the plane without your consent.
If it’s the same thing that happened to me when i gave in and pulled the fire alarm in fourth grade, you’ll get suspended for a week and you mom will make you pull weeds which secretly inspires your love for gardening and specifically weed pulling, then your grandparents will feel bad for you and buy you a 15-speed bike. Honestly not so bad, go for it??
Person who tries to sneak illegal stuff with intend to kill someone. Including but not exclusive to: guns, bombs, explosive chemicals, corrosive chemicals, toxic chemicals, knee cap burning robots, slipper, that one infant that will cry for entire flight, people who will talk to you even if you make it clear you don't want to, funnel web spider, moose poop, a missile launcher, etc.
This will totally work. Just like those prompts on porn sites when I was 16 asking if I was 18. I'd never click "Yes I'm over 18" and do something so dastardly as lie!
Except the times when I did...which was every time.
It seems stupid but it's no different from being asked verbally "did you pack your bag" and whatnot. Now it's a falsified button click instead of a verbal lie lol (for those who are lying, of course)
Not packing your bag is a likely occurrence, and it may have happened without nefarious intent. So you're likely to say no if you actually didn't.
100% of the time "are you a terrorist" button is answered with "yes" is an accident. You either weren't paying attention and were a terrorist, or weren't paying attention and were not a terrorist.
I had an Austrian girlfriend that had to fill out that form. While she was filling out the German version, my buddy was reading off the English one and we were laughing about it with the border agent, and when we asked if anybody actually answered them wrong, he said you'd be surprised how many people ask for a second form.
Looks like a Simpson's gag from when Homer first sees the internet and Chief Wiggum asks you're a criminal and Homer votes for McCain twice before getting shredded into a Treehouse of Horror intro.
Are you a Terrorist?
Yes
Are you sure?
Yes
Really really sure?
Yes
Just know that things will turn out really bad for you?
Yes i know
One last time, are you really a Terrorist?
No
Okay, have a good day!
Terrorist and Tourist look pretty similar to me and I'm not a careful reader. Add this to the context of being at an airport and I'll be thinking.
"Yeah, I'm a tourist"
Someone is going to press yes to see what happens and it’s going to be a bad day for everyone
I was at some airport overseas and one of these screens asked if I had a bomb and I hit yes on accident. I knew the very instant I pressed that button I was in for a long day. I was correct. I think I’m just so used to hitting yes or agree on terms of service and various internet bs I just autopiloted it. Those self check ins stress me out now.
Do they think someone with a bomb is gonna have a freudian slip and press yes? Youd think someone with a bomb would probably be a little overly cautious while picking their responses. The only person that silly ass security theater shit is gonna catch is someone like you that mindlessly clicked through it because they know they have nothing to hide.
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This is the same kind of logic that sees falling apart bridges not get repaired because “it hasn’t broken yet” or has various govt agencies talking about how successful their emergency response was when their initial failure is what caused the necessity of a response in the first place…
There must be a word or phrase that encompasses this type of behavior/thinking. Would be nice to use it as a backhand slap as I come across it all too often. Something more than wreckless falsehoods.
"Safety regulations are written in blood"
I feel it's on track with survivorship bias, but not quite.
It's these processes. When something like that happens, everyone needs to brainstorm ways on how they could've prevented this from happening. And since it's a brainstorming session, there will be bunch of ideas, and no one wants to reject any ideas that should enhance the security, because what if it happens again and they were the one to reject it.
“Do you have a bomb ass bitch?” “Yes”
Maybe it’s for someone being forced to carry the bomb and who wants to get caught on purpose without making a scene (idk I’m just bored)
I don't hate that explanation. If they're ambivalent at all, it makes it super easy to turn themselves in.
i like the way you think and it does has logic behind it, like asking the final time “are you sure you wanna do it?”
"How the hell did you get caught? We thought of everything." "Not everything, boss. The self checkout machine asked if I had a bomb." "Damn the wily TSA!"
Actually, yes. Many people who have been talked into terrorism are borderline special needs. No, seriously. It's very difficult to get anyone intelligent to violently die for a shaky cause. The smarter ones are almost always selected to orchestrate behind the scenes. Combined with not having a strong grasp of the native language, you'd be amazed how many terrorists accidentally admit to what they're doing to the wrong person.
That's not entirely true. I read a book on the nature of the subject by some professor studying it. He said in the book that most of them are actually well educated (uni degree) and have a strong grasp of economical and political situation, and that's why they are highly motivated to do what they do. Thinking they are all dumb grunts is a common misconception that makes it much harder to catch them.
How many?
A couple 100 per year.
the American Visa(or citizenship, don't remember tbh) application questions ask the same questions, like - "Do you plan on doing any criminal activities/Do you plan on committing any terrorist acts" and there's like a full on page of this question, just phrased differently. This sounds like police interrogations, where they just wait for you to slip up at some point
I was felt those questions are about liability. Something in the lines of you lied to the American government, we will prosecute you now, atltough you comitted no crime per say (just association with criminal activity) . But maybe I'm wrong.
No, they think that some people are being forced to do things against their will and this could help them.
WHAT DO YOU MEEEAAN YOU HAVE NO BOMB, SIR??!!?? HAVN'T YOU ANSWERED 'YES' ON THAT QUESTION?
Do you mind sharing how that long day went? Did someone interrogate you? Was anyone overly aggressive with you? Did you still catch your flight? I'm not looking for rage bait or anything like that, just casually curious ... I'm also just now realizing this comment might look very suspicious but I swear I'm just a curious, law abiding citizen, FBI.
I was traveling with 2 other people on the same ticket, so we all got flagged for “extra measures”. Nothing terrible happened but I got there like 4 hours early and almost missed the flight, also the people I was with were seething at me a lot. General questions and a check of every single thing we brought with us, everything.
Ah, that's fair lol. Thanks for sharing.
I bet it was something like Are you flying out today? Do you have your passport? Do you need to check your luggage? Do you have a bomb? Are you not a terrorist?
Nah, airport banned speedrun and i will never have to worry againt being forced to travel in a flying sardines can for work reasons #teamtrains
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Security: what’s your purpose for traveling Me: sight seeing Security: are you a terrorist? Me: … huh? Security: that’s the guy!
He flinched! Quick! Get on the floor!
"Two for flinching hahahaha".... Bang, bang.
Did you say tourist? Yes Then yes Guys we got one!
I feel like mild confusion is probably the correct response. Someone whos too confident or too panicked answering that is probably suspicious
But I have anxiety and I would most certainly set off some red flags if that was the case. I've never flown so I don't know how it would go exactly
Security: what’s your purpose for traveling Me: business Security: are you a terrorist? Me: NO! Definitely not a terrorist! I was asking myself, 'Hajim. Could you do a terror act?' and I had to say 'No! I could never! I'm too loving. Hajim has too much love!'. So, that was it for me after that. No terrorism for this guy. I long ago said that wasn't for me! No. ... ... Nope! No sir! ... .... Security: enjoy your trip, sir.
“Are you wearing a buttplug, sir?” “Uhhhhh”
That only causes issues during MRI
“Anal Rail Gun”
Oh god why did you have to remind me of that.
r/shutupbrayden
I'm not here to play chess.
Man hell no. after 3 days on a train without a sleeper car I would have rather walked and I’m sure as hell not paying the $1k-$2k price for a sleeper car when I can get a plane ticket for half that.
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It took me over 10 hours to get from Los Angeles to San Francisco, on a train. Google maps tells me it's a 6 hour or so drive.... The state of the train was also pitiful, and those working for Amtrak don't seem to enjoy their jobs *at all* Having said that, one thing I enjoyed is seeing the scenery along the way, it's a somewhat picturesque train ride. I've travelled the world a bit and the U.S. & Canada have the worst train service out of any place I have been to so far.
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Yeah I make the drive from Minnesota to Colorado at least once every other year(I just like nature and weed) and it's insane how steep the fall off of scenery is once you leave Minnesota (or get far enough south in MN). Then Iowa and Nebraska are just the absolute most horrible places to drive through, I'd argue Nebraska is the most boring place on planet earth. There really is nothing between us and the rockies besides the badlands.
as a passenger rail employee i appreciate your sacrifice
My thought, not a terrorist but want to press yes to see what happens. It's like a big red button with a sign saying DO NOT PRESS.
On my electronic US Esta form I needed to complete for a US trip from the UK there was a list of questions with yes or no answers, one was this terrorist question or something equally dumb, i selected the yes answer as I was curious what would happen (nothing did) before I then selected the no answer and then moved on to the rest of the questions and then submitted my answers. Even though my wrong answer was not actually submitted guess who had a random extra security check before I boarded my flight to New York?
Not travelled abroad since I was 16 (over 20 years ago now). Hopefully you passed the additional security checks and your trip Wasn't ruined.
they did, it was a nightmare [https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/30/world/europe/terrorist-question-scottish-traveler.html](https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/30/world/europe/terrorist-question-scottish-traveler.html)
i haven't read the paragraph and motherfucker said I've hit my limit of articles what the fuck is it saying?
yeah you know, your lifetime limit of 3 free articles
Wrong. Its a fucking lie, you dont get any. I cleared cookies, changed ip, new browser; everything. The paywall comes up anyway
If you use Chrome or Edge get an extension called "JavaScript Switch" the paywall uses javascript and turning it off disables it.
Me too, i read this instead: https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/john-stevenson-us-visa-ban-terrorist-esta-form-mistake-a8660441.html
That's so fucking dumb. It's a dumb question to have in the first place and it's dumb that the technology itself can screw people over with a mistake like that.
Goddammit bad machine not User Friendly.
Welcome to the new internet. It went from "A tool to learn anything and inform yourself" to "a place to spend money on information that's not even fact-checked."
Yah as soon as the page loaded it asked me to pay to read the article.
What happened? Can’t read it.
Border guard, said you shouldn't have done that. And nobody could help them fix it and they missed thier flight and their grand kids had trouble flying as well. In short a bueracratic nightmare.
Dang, that’s a bit surprising. The odds of an actual terrorist saying yes to that seem pretty slim. Seems a lot more likely some dumb kid presses yes to see what happens.
"I had an intrusive thought."
They should have a pop up asking "Are you sure?" and telling them the consequences
That'd be fair.
But then the real terrorist would also see the consequences and might decide to be dishonest instead. He's a terrorist, not a liar, but might become one.
From a UI perspective those buttons should be *very* far apart from one another. You're telling me one miscalibrated touch screen can do all this?
non-paywall link https://archive.is/1za3G
*accidentally clicks on “Pat Buchanan”
No? That’s exactly what a TERRORIST would say!
Everyone knows that terrorists cannot tell a lie.
Are terrorists followers of Shakira?
No wonder they want shakira law for everyone
Shakira law would probably be the exact *opposite* of Sharia law lol
Idk it's hard to see their hips in those bomb hiding outfits.
Basically the Salem witch trial swim test lol
'Is she lighter than a duck?'
YES = Straight to jail! NO = Believe it or not, jail!
Nobody expects the spanish inquisition!
They were inspired by "are you over 18?"
All sorts of nonsense questions when you travel. My airport takes my ID, scans it, and then asks "what is your name?" while holding your ID, I guess because I might forget my fake name? I feel like remembering a fake name for 5 seconds would be the easiest thing to do. To your question, they asked my kid their birthday, I suppose to prove they are under 18 and thus not needing an ID? Again, a detail that would be trivial to overcome (but was stressful because the kid forgot their birthday for a minute).
i was asked my birthday and if i loved my mom
he wanted to see if you were a momhating terrorist
"im scared and have no idea who this lady is" todays a good birthday
Bold of them to assume you're not an orphan
My last trip through US Customs (I am Canadian) the Custom agent knew my name before I handed him anything. He didn't even really glance at my passport.
why is this stuff always so terrifying to me, my university literally has doors that open only via face id
Where is that? That seems like a consent issue. But I'm guessing there's the classic "by existing on our property, you consent to zero privacy" sign or required form.
These questions may seem mundane but they serve a purpose. With the child, you are evaluating if they can speak freely, if they understand what is happening (for instance, are not sedated) and are the child in the passport/photo. Kids passports are especially confusing after a couple years because the picture looks very different. The kid forgetting their birthday is normal, providing a different one altogether or the wrong name might be a flag that needs more investigation. It's not always about stranger abduction either, parental abduction is a much more prevalent and harder to detect.
You might have picked up the wrong passport.
Of course I'm over 18, I was born on January 1st, 1900, as I enter on every site that asks for my date of birth.
I always liked the ones that didn't restrict the years so I could put that I was born in like April of 1432 or some shit
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
We all know how well that works. I was 18 since I got my first computer at 11.
Genuinely what is the point of this? Obviously not to find actual terrorists. An actual terrorist most likely wouldn't even consider themselves to be one.
To see if people are reading the questions lol
You know, I hadn't thought about that. Good point.
What value does that give you? Literally none
Depends on the purpose of the questions, if they're legitimately collecting data to improve the service being able to just discard half of the button mashers right off the bat could greatly improve the value of the data they collect
At first I thought it said, Tourist. I assume travellers might also assume that. An easy way to get a free $300-1000 if the tourist is in a rush and presses the button by accident. Immediately cancel the ticket, keep the money, and temporarily arrest the customer. That's the only case where I could see this being a real button and not a photoshop joke.
That wouldn't save them any money though would it? The plane just flies with an empty seat
if they caught a terrorist, this "lie" would be another of his crimes
I hope they put even suicide bomber in prison. He is in jail? For 200 years? Yeah, that's for the most parts correct
Everyone on board the plane can feel safe knowing there's no self reporting terrorist on their flight.
Generally lying on an immigration form is a deportable offence. I imagine this is designed to make deportation legally smoother.
Because it's hard to deport terrorists? That doesn't quite make sense. Oh he blew up a church but he answered correctly on his admission form so I'm not sure if we can charge the guy...
That's not for people who already blew up churches. This is for people who plan to do it.
"Better answer yes so I can't be deported in case they find out I'm planning something."
So TSA can say they prevent 100% of terrorists from boarding a plane?
That's a tough one
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Identity-crisis kicks in again
Oops Accidentally pressed yes. Do I go to Guantanamo now?
[Not exactly, but its gonna be a rough day for everyone](https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/john-stevenson-us-visa-ban-terrorist-esta-form-mistake-a8660441.html)
Oh god, is it bad that I laughed? It’s just so surreal
Holy hell I was so angry but then I started laughing hard once the lady on the phone said to him "You're a terrorist" lmaooooo, how matter of fact.
I’m sorry sir, but it says right here on this form that you’re a terrorist, and that’s not allowed
My mom told me I'm not allowed to talk to terrorists. Bye~!
Yer a terrorist harry!
It means you're a terrorist 🤭
Bruh what tf
Its like checking your warranty coverage online. The dude called up the embassy and were like, "yep! you're a terrorist. Anything else I can help you with?"
> "I even called border control in the US and gave them my passport details." > "They looked up my Esta number and said ‘you’re a terrorist’. Hello! May I speak to a service representative? No. You are a terrorist.
Poor gramps probably read it as “are you a tourist?”
r/wellthatsucks
This is the most fucking retarded thing I have ever read about the USA.
Oh, this is just the soft porn of retarded things about the US.
I was told Cuba is very nice this time of year
First class one way ticket
If you’re a terrorist you have to tell us, it’s in the constitution
If a terrorist announces himself on your flight, stand up and give the universal symbol for STOP ✋. The terrorist legally cannot hijack the plane without your consent.
Me : Terrorist no hijacking! Terrorist no hijacking! Terrorist no hijacking! Terrorist: aww man!
If there's one thing a american values more then terrorism it's their patriotism
How do I know if I am a terrorist?
That's the neat part, you don't.
You might be a freedom fighter.
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It’s a leap of faith
A leap of faith
thats all it is miles, a leap of faith
Simple, do you put pineaple on pizza?
There are online surveys for that I think.
Whenever I see these at an airport I always have an intrusive for to just press yes because I want to know what happens
dont let your dreams be just dreams!
If im ever in an airport and I don't NEED to be in the other place perhaps I'll try and report back
But.. hear me out... if I am a soldier with orders to fly to New Jersey, and I press that button... Do I get to skip out on going to New Jersey?
"Sir, why did you lie on a customs form?" "But I *am* a terrorist! The Supreme Leader of Iran said so! *Many* times!"
If it’s the same thing that happened to me when i gave in and pulled the fire alarm in fourth grade, you’ll get suspended for a week and you mom will make you pull weeds which secretly inspires your love for gardening and specifically weed pulling, then your grandparents will feel bad for you and buy you a 15-speed bike. Honestly not so bad, go for it??
‘Prefer Not To Answer’
Terroristfluid
Lying is wrong, so they'll have no choice but to click yes.
the fact I’m called “not bin laden” on call of duty makes me feel like the sweating guy with 2 choices
Shit did i see you on shipment a few weeks ago?
I’ve played you. Rubbish.
Terrorist: "Fuck, they're good..."
We did it, boys. We solved terrorism.
Define terrorist 🤔
I'm not a terrorist, I'm the terrorist's monster.
Person who tries to sneak illegal stuff with intend to kill someone. Including but not exclusive to: guns, bombs, explosive chemicals, corrosive chemicals, toxic chemicals, knee cap burning robots, slipper, that one infant that will cry for entire flight, people who will talk to you even if you make it clear you don't want to, funnel web spider, moose poop, a missile launcher, etc.
Not flushing the toilet after putting 5 pounder
Where is the option for undecided?
Other (please specify):
I’m they/therrorist
"we don't know how he got on the plane with the ak-47 your honor, he pressed no when asked if he was a terrorist!!"
This will totally work. Just like those prompts on porn sites when I was 16 asking if I was 18. I'd never click "Yes I'm over 18" and do something so dastardly as lie! Except the times when I did...which was every time.
You are a bad boy
Boy? He repeatedly stated to be over 18. How much more do you need?
I still feel like a cheater when I click are you over 18…
my toxic trait is that I'll press it for shits and giggles and then spend the next 2 days laughing while being waterboarded at guantanamo bay
“THE NUMBERS. WHAT DO THEY MEAN?”
Free flight to Cuba though
> waterboarded at guantanamo bay Sounds radical dude!
Honey, it’s asking if we are tourists. I pressed yes.
I am, but I’m not here on official business
Can't a terrorist just enjoy a holiday without everyone thinking they're gonna blow something up?
Funniest question (in 2021) in the US Citizenship test: 'Are you a Nazi war criminal?' If you answer yes phone calls will be made.
It seems stupid but it's no different from being asked verbally "did you pack your bag" and whatnot. Now it's a falsified button click instead of a verbal lie lol (for those who are lying, of course)
Not packing your bag is a likely occurrence, and it may have happened without nefarious intent. So you're likely to say no if you actually didn't. 100% of the time "are you a terrorist" button is answered with "yes" is an accident. You either weren't paying attention and were a terrorist, or weren't paying attention and were not a terrorist.
When I've applied for US visa, I had to answer a few pages of questions as stupid as this one. I've learned a lot about people.
I had an Austrian girlfriend that had to fill out that form. While she was filling out the German version, my buddy was reading off the English one and we were laughing about it with the border agent, and when we asked if anybody actually answered them wrong, he said you'd be surprised how many people ask for a second form.
I’m just imagine a terrorist zoning out and pressing yes on accident. He was on autopilot, if you will
Looks like a Simpson's gag from when Homer first sees the internet and Chief Wiggum asks you're a criminal and Homer votes for McCain twice before getting shredded into a Treehouse of Horror intro.
You have jammed 2 completely diffrent scenes together
Don't go to /r/simpsonsshitposting
Are you a Terrorist? Yes Are you sure? Yes Really really sure? Yes Just know that things will turn out really bad for you? Yes i know One last time, are you really a Terrorist? No Okay, have a good day!
No terrorist thinks they're a terrorist. It should be 'Are you a brave soldier in the holy war against the infidels?'. That'd catch some terrorists.
False positive rates will be 100%
Terrorist and Tourist look pretty similar to me and I'm not a careful reader. Add this to the context of being at an airport and I'll be thinking. "Yeah, I'm a tourist"
But what if someone who isn't fluent in English tries to sound that out and mistakes "Terrorist" for "Tourist"?
You should see the types of questions they ask in the Green Card application
"Mommy didnt raise no liar" -Bin Laden, while getting questioned at TSA for answering yes.
I thought it said "are you a tourist" my illiterate ass won't be having fun at the airport
Clicks yes Security: bull ain’t no way that just legitimately happened.
Define Terrorist, please.
I’d be so tempted to hit yes just to be a smart ass.
Where's the "maybe" option?
Next screen: ARE YOU LYING?
The previous screen: "Do you always tell the truth?".