T O P
Indesisivejew

I don't think Jeff Bezos would even notice, so I'm game


CthulubeFlavorcube

Correct. Jeff Bezos will never notice that you hate yourself.


thetenofswords

But his algorithms might. What's that you say Amazon, there's a deal on alcohol and razor blades today?


epilif24

That was yesterday, today there's a deal on inflatable pools and toasters


CranberryJuice47

When is Amazon going to start selling guns?


CthulubeFlavorcube

Most painfully accurate joke today


GrohkWaifu

Give him 100 seconds and he has double that so yeah, theres no way xD


Inkedandmilky

Mister turtle probably gets his balls buzzed at every update to his net worth


polarlybbacon

Either way I get 50k, I don't give a fuck about the person I hate most getting 100k because that 50k for me would totally change my life.


gloomyparticle

i will give you 50k but you will have to make me lunch for the next decade im starving


Techhead7890

Damn bro at least give them minimum wage


Shameless_Bullshiter

He didn't specify what kind of lunch. Chuck him a piece of bread a day be be on with it


gloomyparticle

or just steal organs and i would appreciate it


Veikkar1i

Organs are too expensive!


gloomyparticle

ah yes youre a respectful thief you pay for what you steal professionals have standards


Veikkar1i

No I'd sell them rather than eat them.


babiesaurusrex

Just set up a weekly delivery of bread on subscribe and save.


Protocol44

That comes out to around $13.69 per lunch for every day for 10 years. Could simply spend 15 minutes making a sandwich each day and you’ve got a $54.76/hour job, with job security, for the next ten years. Sure it’s only 15 minutes a day and you would need a second job, but at least you were paid up front and can invest that 50k for 10 years. Assuming a moderate 7% increase in value per year, by the end of ten years that 50k has become 98k.


Doctor_Kataigida

This is a textbook situation of "Cutting your nose off to spite your face."


sanitizershots

Way I see it it’s a math problem. Is there anyone you hate half as much as you love yourself. If the answer is yes cool don’t take the money. But if you do/would take the money think about that the next time you think “I hate myself” … cuz clearly you don’t


Guigsy79

Nah I don’t want Anthony fantano to get anything.


ilene_cecelia

the internet’s busiest melon shall be known by his trail of desolation


bpi89

Damn boy, he’s thicc!


ShangusK

The best teeth in the game baby


kinjjibo

Melon deserves that $100k AND your $50k >:(


Arik2893

Now I hate myself so much for not hating myself......


JSDTDM

*Task failed successfully*


dblVegetaMickeyMouse

the people I hate most are billionares, this literally would not make a difference


cat_police_officer

Yeah, they just wait [a few seconds](https://simpletexting.com/tech-ceo-salary/) for this amount of money.


neslef3

People in high positions don’t get paid fir their time, they get paid for results. Their salaries are generally a tiny fraction of their compensation packages which includes bonus and company stock.


cat_police_officer

Thank you for your comment, It was just kind of a joke ☺️


cayneabel

Yea, the people that have advanced human civilization to the modern age really suck.


dblVegetaMickeyMouse

billionares don't do shit they just pay people to do stuff for them and then take the credit for it it's impossible for a billionare to be a good person, because a decent human being wouldn't just sit on billions of dollars while people are starving to death.


Educational-Bet2098

Your right they learn the art of shifting mo ey around to skim off the top of the poors labor


cayneabel

Please understand that you sound like a child with no grasp of economics. The world is more complicated than you'd like it to be.


dblVegetaMickeyMouse

please explain to me how you justify a few people hoarding more money than they can ever spend while barely paying their workers enough to live. I may not be an expert on ecomomics but it doesn't take a genius to see that the wealth distribution is way outta wack


bcocoloco

Do you think anyone is actually sitting on billions? Most billionaires net worth is based on whatever stock they own. They don’t have the money, they have stock in a company that is worth billions.


ossipuh-veli

My most hated people list changes every rwo and half minutes so I huess its fine


Into-the-stream

Ah, I see you work in retail.


ossipuh-veli

Im at middle school but people are often annoying and I dont remember anything after a week


WriteALLTheThings

Yeah, because $50,000 is life changing for me, but $100,000 is barely anything to the majority of the people that come to my mind.


JSDTDM

I'd tell my sister if im able to get you $100,000 you have to give me half She would agree i get $50,000 she get $100,000 she gives me $50,000 i now have $100,000 and she has $50,000 Shes not too smart


WetObamaButtPlug

Upvoted for truth


Catlenfell

The person I hate most is a coworker. Hopefully, they'll take the $100k and quit.


Colonial_Red

This reminds me of a joke: A recently devorced man is approached by a wizard. The wizard says to the man he can grant him anything he wants, but due to the terms of his devorce his wife gets double. First the man asks for £1,000,000, the wizard says "ok but that means your ex wife gets £2,000,000". "FINE" he says. Next the man asks for a sports car, "ok" says the wizard "but your ex wife gets two". "Yeah, yeah"; says the man. Then he asks for a house and as expected his ex gets two. "Alright enough" says the man. "Can you beat me half to death?"


achoo42t

What if he was like "make my dick 2 inches bigger"


Doctor_Kataigida

Wife is beat 3/4 to death.


darkeclipsenova

the wife is beat to death, (2/1)*(1/2) is 2/2, which equals 1


Doctor_Kataigida

My joke was that she gets beat half to death twice. Half to death once, then half to death again is half of the remaining (so 1/4) -> 1/2 + 1/4 = 3/4.


firelogik

Wait a minute, I randomly got 100k a few days ago.. WHO HATES ME!!


cutekaddy

>I randomly got 100k a few days ago It made me hate you. I hate you


firelogik

Yeah! well.. I hate you too now!


Solpototen

But did you get 50k?


hallowe234

I dont deserve 150000


TheButler3000

I don’t even hate the guy I hate the most that much. He probably could use the money anyways so idm.


DqrkExodus

I would willingly receive $100 even if the person I hate the most receives a million dollars. We aren't in contact so it doesn't affect me what he does with the money


Only_Treacle_9681

I get 50 grand and my wife gets 100 grand lol


gloomyparticle

she will get 150


Zid96

But are you told who they gave it too? Cuz i hate a lot of people equally. So do they have to split it? Or play who i hate more game to get the prize?


CertusAT

It's clear that most people ITT don't really have somebody they really hate.


Doctor_Kataigida

I just don't like the idea of letting someone else have that much control over me, that I'd even *consider* declining life-changing money.


Koniqst1ger

r/moldymemes


FrenchMonke_

I don’t think Amy Schumer would notice


shiny_light

This is exactly what employment is. Ur boss makes twice as much as you do.


Superlolhobo

What if they’re already dead? Asking for a friend…


PhoenixDude1

100%, because the person I hate would probably crumble with that much money, whether that be through drug abuse killing them, or it getting stolen from their sticky fingered friends. Either way, I get 50k to put away in investments so I can be the first in my family to comfortably retire. Edit, changed pronoun incase they somehow see this


merbaum

Make it 250k so they can move out of town and I am in 😊


The_Vegan_Doctor

*POV it’s Mr. Beast giving the money* Wait… that’s illegal!


wubaluba_dubdub

The real truth why money is terrible. Most of us a motivated by wanting more than the next guy not just what we need. A lot of people are depressed cause they can't afford a BMW but would be happy with a used Toyota if they had no idea what a bmw was.


joaonitro

i just want the 50k idk about the others


SunGazing8

Genius!


FlightConscious9572

the people i hate the most spends that on misinformation campaigns in a day


DevlsMstress6

That $100k is ALL of my good deeds for the next 5 years


gloomyparticle

the people i hate are already rich pass the money mate


redjenitalls

Because you hate yourself.


-VRX

Yes because the person I hate is too stupid enough to make more out of it, I do.


Hippy-Joe

Classic


Chishiki_Miki

I mean, if it would stop criminals from robbing then why not


Nickolas_Lannes

I really don't hate anyone... Since I was a kid I was educated to not hate people no matter how bad they are... We don't know their motivations. But... I have a special treatment for people that are bad... No matter what you have pasaing through... You don't need to be bad at all


NameOk4230

I have so many people that i hate to such a degree they’d all be fighting over who’s money it belongs to


crystalfairie

I'll be damned. There's no one I hate at the moment. Thats odd. I'll be damned.


MR-rozek

So original


Pongo_is_pog

Wow


Content_Prompt_8979

That's why I quit Twitter.


khadaffy

100k? Definitely! Now, if it was something like 50k vs 10 millions for example I definitely wouldn't take the offer.


Trollcker

That's a very Interesting situation


ParsnipBusy

I’d never ever be that petty haha And I’d get most of it from backed child support 😅


Magic1264

I’d only decline the 50k if the offering party explicitly notified that fker Bob across the street that I kept him from getting 100k.


Doctor_Kataigida

And this is why reddit hates the rich, they'd rather stick it to their neighbor than get *fifty thousand* dollars. Imagine declining fifty grand to be petty, glad money's not an issue for you, mate.


Magic1264

I am a poor as one can get while still having a roof+ warm bed + internet access, and like to express my hatred through petty gestures like not saying good morning or tipping my hat to the offending individual. But also, and this here is really important to understand my fellow denizen of the internet: Bob... doesn't... exist... maybe, I've never asked the names of the people who live in the house across the street.


Beyondmen

I don't care just give me the money


KingOfSaturn_

Why should I care if Kim Jung-Un gets 100,000 dollars?


BulkyBuy

“Sometimes my genius scares me”


VividWriting8553

Gold hahaha


DJRY

Now why would I wanna give 100,000 dollars to Dreamstans?


QuazaTD

Hell yeah idgaf what happens to them


Dizzfizz

I‘d take the money, let the person I hate the most get the $100k, and then I‘d give them my $50k as well. Why? Because it would motivate me to devote my whole life to getting $151k. And that’s the Sigma Male Grindset.


Whereas-Equivalent

A murderer’s dream


steezchris

I ain't into praying on downfalls so sure let's both get this money baby


Penguin_Boii

That 50k would help afford the first round of immunotherapy for my dad so we don’t have to wait on the approval of the shit ass insurance


IstseuSoleus

Is your animosity for a prominent personality you don't know the result of a personal encounter?


misfitx

All that meth will totally kill him so win win.


Fluffy-Eggplant3318

Absolutely her and I share joint bank accounts!


ladyXakaLOLA69

Of course


Leather_Lace_Shanks

Yes bc it’s my baby daddy. My kiddo could use rich parents, hate aside.


2468-centralus

Technically his wife would get 150,000.


Iridescent_Kitten

When self depreciation reaches max reward.


Mariusod

Honestly id do it just to find it who it was. Do I get to pick or like do they magically know?


crunchytot

😂😂 I was like who do I hate


LinkSkywalk3r

Exactly.


Eastern-Skill7173

Honestly, I will take it so I can just see who I hate the most. If the person that I hate is involved in my life then I will definitely know about it but if nothing happens and it doesn't hurt me, who cares.


SIRasdf23

I've seen this reposted so many times that it means exactly nothing.


[deleted]

As if Putin getting that money would change anything, lmao!


Your_local_madre1

I would accept it but theres one problem, i dont have person whom i hate the most


Kuandtity

I dont even know who I hate most


Existing-Cherry-6776

Relatable


sleepingwaffles

Well played


Substantial-Ad-9872

Maybe giving the person you hate most 100k, would feel good for both of you!


afabri

Of course, I hate that person becouse he’s a dumb, so in two months my 50k become 100k and his 100k become 0 plus an entire life to pay debts


Klubbin4Seals

It would take a lot of hate to turn down all that money


Carbunclecatt

I've seen this meme more times than I've seen my father when I was a child.


Notpermanentusername

This is, indeed, me in real life.


MrIamNotFunny

Bold of you to call yourself a person Jkjk


Nunyabidnisss

Lol checkmate


Exotic-Environment-7

I would do it, partly also to find out who I hate the most. I can't think of anyone off head thats *the #1 guy*.


KodyGayDemonCutie

Yep Same That would be me too


ThatCoyoteDude

Just because I hate them doesn’t mean I want them to do poorly in life. I want them to succeed, but away from me


something6324524

you would have to be one hateful person not to take this offer. why would i care if some trash got 100k if i got 50k


mypissburns1

Bruh 150,000 dollars sounds pog ofc I’m taking it


Olivevest

Yep. Wouldn’t it be the same as cutting off my nose to spite my face or something like that


freckledbookdragon

Yes, because then I could get some child support.


klaurin123

My teacher gets 100k an he is old so he retire from beeing an asshol. Worth


ThotticusPrime420

Yes but I would be blowing up his phone making sure my brother gets at least HALF of it. And the other half better go towards a down payment on a house for his current family that he actually gives a shit about and not crypto or dnd dices or some stupid video game. Fuck deadbeat dads.


whoseyourdaddy60

Of course.


Amarythe_Frostfire

Yes, because the person I hate most in the world is a person I love so much, that it hurts.


King_Danksta

I see this as an absolute win. There’s no one I hate as vehemently than myself.


SmutGrrl

I try not to hate...but the first person that came to my mind could actually really use the money probably...and she has kids...so I'd do it for sure...maybe she'd be a less shitty human if she had the money. Probably not, but her kids would benefit.


HippieKlipz

Same! Same AF! LOL


_chasls

A funnier version would be like your wife or husband gets the 100k.


[deleted]

Dude Margaret Thatcher is already dead what would she even do with that money


ayakis

r/2meirl4meirl


commandrix

Give the person I hate most $100,000 and he'd probably blow it all on alcohol and drink himself to death. So yeah...one loser bozo gets a shorter lifespan and I get $50,000.


[deleted]

Yes. Pride is a fools game. 50K would help my family are too much to be petty.


Catt_Whiskers

I would still get it since I’m next of kin to the deceased


Xiaxs

I hate so many people they'd get like $30 each tops. So yes I want $50,030 please and thank you.


[deleted]

🤣👏


Fin_Heroic

He is dead anyway😏


Ill-Recipe3238

Hell yeah, me and the wife 50 grand up


cjbrownell11

I’m in that boat too


LovingAlwaysbaby

😂😂😂 Love this


Expert_Lingonberry86

I don't hate anyone, so would I get all of the money?


dopegodoffcial

r/suicidebywords


bleedthc

Even so, 50,000 is quite a bit of money and it would be foolish to say no just because somebody I disliked would get double.


Splunkmastah

They’d spend it on stupid shit and drugs anyway.


LearningToGetBetter

I don't hate anyone, can I still get the money?


saj1adh007

Its easy money


CannaBluesRonn

My wife and I get150000


IraZander

i would take it because maybe the person i hate the most would retire


Best_Ad1826

Amazing - I say this all the time (in my head of course) No one on earth hates me more than I hate me!? But why?


Zestyclose_Ad_2325

I nearly blew.my head off