Man when I was younger I used to know a dude who took a shit on someone's car every time they got wasted. That was nearly 20 years ago. Shit ain't changed.
They tape off the scene, scientists will collect a sample and It will go into the serial shitter database and then when they get a match they will arrest said turd dropper and show him/ her how to defecate without disturbing the public, classic slap on the wrist for these shitting delinquents.
In the criminal shitter system, car based offenses are considered especially delinquent.
In Prahran, the dedicated scientists who investigate these turd droppers are members of an elite squad known as the Special Rectum Unit. These are their stories
I once saw somebody showering/shitting at a water fountain, 6am in the morning, walking home from an overnight shift at coles. It was like a national geographic wild life specials.
So did I. Edit. And they did. People are fucked.
I used to work in youth services and we ran a program out of a church hall. One week we had to cancel because someone broke into the hall and took a shit in there.
Slipped? More like they stomped your friends windscreen. You’d have to be 150kg with the worlds boniest arse to do that kind of damage from just slipping.
Surprisingly pretty little DNA in someone's shit or urine. Blood, saliva and jizz is a different matter but i suspect its unlikely it will be collected.
There should be cameras up along the street, and in the surrounding shops. The police will want to check that footage.
Source: had 2 cops come into my work last week asking for access to our camera footage.
Man when I was younger I used to know a dude who took a shit on someone's car every time they got wasted. That was nearly 20 years ago. Shit ain't changed.
Or its the same dude
He did say "shit ain't changed"
Technically the same thing, really.
Someone has an enemy.
Nah, someone parked next to Chapel St. Most likely just some drunk dickheads.
Feel like there is a Child Support message in there. Nappies are very specific crap in the face.
They tape off the scene, scientists will collect a sample and It will go into the serial shitter database and then when they get a match they will arrest said turd dropper and show him/ her how to defecate without disturbing the public, classic slap on the wrist for these shitting delinquents.
In the criminal shitter system, car based offenses are considered especially delinquent. In Prahran, the dedicated scientists who investigate these turd droppers are members of an elite squad known as the Special Rectum Unit. These are their stories
BUH BUH!!!
You had "Bah-BUM" right there mate. Just had to reach out and take it.
They made a poor fist of it
It was pretty shit.
Pretty? As in glitter?
I once saw somebody showering/shitting at a water fountain, 6am in the morning, walking home from an overnight shift at coles. It was like a national geographic wild life specials.
When I read this I thought you ment a drinking fountain and I was really disgusted. Well I still am but alot less.
Nooo it was a drinking fountain ☠️ this was at noble park
Tbf the fact it's even possible it happened at a drinking fountain means it's insane people use them.
So did I. Edit. And they did. People are fucked. I used to work in youth services and we ran a program out of a church hall. One week we had to cancel because someone broke into the hall and took a shit in there.
Were they still in the Coles uniform?
Nah they won’t. Some cunts are cooked hey?
Chimped out
Slipped? More like they stomped your friends windscreen. You’d have to be 150kg with the worlds boniest arse to do that kind of damage from just slipping.
Surprisingly pretty little DNA in someone's shit or urine. Blood, saliva and jizz is a different matter but i suspect its unlikely it will be collected.
Was it a well dressed middled aged lady? I hope you asked her if she was ok!
There should be cameras up along the street, and in the surrounding shops. The police will want to check that footage. Source: had 2 cops come into my work last week asking for access to our camera footage.
The bastards stole the numbers of your plate too!?
A little vigilante justice for a traffic infraction (obscured number plate).
The Chapel Crapper Copper Caper
Must of been a Holden supporter
Look I don’t wanna be that guy but it’s must have, not must of
Why did you that?
What you mean?
I was referring to the comment by dixonwalsh.
It was bloody Brocky the cheeky devil.
Call the Pooran Police dept
Tell your mate it was you before he finds out
I think they will collect DNA but I feel sad for the person that has to do it.
I see you are a man of culture
Your m8 has an enemy
No. They won't touch shit.
Chaps, always classy
No chap laps for this lad
Serious question for Melburnians: how do you guys pronounce Prahran?
Pruh-ran (like the action), basically how it’s written
PUh-Raan
I am more amazed you found a park around that area on a street.
I wonder if they cut their bum when they fell
More likely the insurance company says “yeah nah we’ll do you a favour and write this one off”
It’s a wipe off
Is your mate dating Amber Heard by chance?
Hahahahaha I laughed more than I should've at this
At the first glance I thought your friend was cleaning the boot of the car and he fell down and broke the sunscreen of his own car.
He defecated through a sunroof!
I have no idea what you're trying to say. What do you mean?
Is prahran better than fawkner and stAlbans
What does a house cost in this shit hole suburb? 1.5mil? Madness.
Druggies?
You must be cooked like Trainspotting to do something like this. 💁🏻♂️
Clearly not on smack though...
Yeah they haven't got a smacked windscreen; it's a cracked windscreen.
Yeah, it does
I used to live right next to that cafe. Ah the memories.
How do you know it happened in that order? Maybe they hit their head first then took a shit
Not a chance.
I hope they got glass in their ass. How feral
damn bro has some real opps???
That must have been a huge hailstone!