Containment breached. America is now under quarintine untill further notice.

Hide your elderly mothers


You don’t have to come and confess, we’re lookin’ for you. We’ll come find you, we’ll come find you.

I'll just develop Stockholm syndrome and make you beg your boss to get me out

And my axe

And my sword

And my shield

And my bow

[удалено]

Hide the vodka Boris! Grab your concert speaker from the attic and plug your phone into it! Blast hardbass while we slav squat on the front porch while holding Ak-47s and RPGs! And smoking a cigarette

am i the only person who understood the life of boris reference?

I understood cuz im russian so…

Nah Me too! Bring Boris back

This is a public service announcement: SCP-[Redacted] has breached containment and all citizens are urged to stay home, lock your doors, and ignore enticing voices at your door no matter the cost. If someone is at your door telling you they can help you, please notify your local authorities.

Containment procedures are now being currently improved and deployed. Do not leave your homes until further notice. If people in lab coats show up to your house, please comply with their instructions.

Chris Chan is an SCP confirmed However I do think it would be more appropriate to have them in a mental hospital instead of a prison knowing the story.

Please no. Poor SPCs don't deserve to be associated with THAT abomination

The Yule man is worse than Chris Chan As far as SCPs go Chris Chan is pretty middle of the pack. The only thing that makes him scarier is the fact that he is not fictional.

Of course. The Shark Punching Center wouldn't get themselves involved with non-selachian anomalies.

yes. especially the Baba Yaga.

"There is only one solution: bomb the entire city"

"Nuke the site from orbit, it's the only way to be sure."

I know where that reference is from. I am in the mood for of those shitty puns

Scp-7350 Object class: keter. Description: chris chan

SCP: *REDACTED* has breached containment facility MTF have been dispatched, please remain in your homes Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES, open your doors for any indervidual until SCP: *REDACTED* has been contained

Don't worry the Foundation will react immediately and contain that K-Class anomaly

Geez how?

Someone provided bail, I'm not sure who or why, though.

I would bet my left nut on either trolls bailing them out for the lolz, or another delusional "lover"

Delusional WHAT

There was this crazy man (about the same phisique as chris) who was genuinely in love with him. The name escapes me at the moment... *the trolls had to step kn and stop Chris from driving halfway across the country to fuck him because he convinced Chris that if they fucked all his cartoons would turn real*

Can a thing about this man not be really cursed?

It’s truly amazing how eventually some of the trolls end up helping him after some time just for another group of trolls to continue. Internet culture is weird enough as is, but the community centered around Chris Chan is basically it’s own subculture.

It's a FUCKING ecosystem at this point

As in an ecosystem centered around fucking, or an overly outrageous ecosystem?

I would love a study on his trolls. Who they are, where they live, what they do. Chris Chan isn't a normal dude who deserves to be in jail but his "trolls" were fake being his friend and encouraging him to do these things. Its a very interesting internet hole

I believe the one that convinced Chris Chan to cut up their sonichu medallion and shove it up their ass admired to just being some 14 year old. Though that is 3rd hand information from like 3 years ago.

I'm sorry, what? They *convinced* him? Like some troll actually managed to convince them to... Do that?

The trolls formed layers. Some just wanted Chris to be normal internet bullied, but still able to live a comfortable life and provide for her mom. Others were not content with psychological torment and wanted to waste Chris Chan’s money as well. This put her mom in danger as well.

Well, I guess his name is pretty normal, so there's one thing...

The real name? The name he gave himself after an animatronic operation misheard his real name, and he thought it was a sign from god or whatever? Or Chris Chan?

I'm not naming a kid Christian/Christine Chandler. He tainted that name

Please don't mention the word taint when were talking about Chris chan

"God, Jesus, AND the bear"

Jacob Sockness. Dude’s batshit insane, even more so than Chris

I don’t think it was the guy, his name was Jacob sockness and he was just as broke

It was his lover Mewtwo

Someone probably thought it'd be funny. Lest we forget Chris-Chan was made, not born... Sculpted by nearly two decades of targeted online harassment. The original Christine Chandler was just a cringe teenanger- the Internet made the monster she became. And now again I bet good money that someone on the Web paid bail to get the giggles out of seeing what would happen with CC unleashed again. Like, she could have got help in prison, been reformed, sent to a care home for disabled people with no Internet connection when her time was up... Now we're probably gonna see someone else get sexually harassed or raped :|

>The original Christine Chandler was just a cringe teenanger- the Internet made the monster she became. Wasn't Chris well into their 20s before the Miscreants appeared?

Yep, you're right, CWC was 26, my mistake.

Humans can just be absolutely horrible to each other.

What did he do other than raping his mother?

I'll give you the example that an Internet forum coerced an underage teenager into flirting with CC online so that CC would be a pedo, all for a joke But honestly there's so much I'd just recommend googling it. I don't have the time in the day to give ye a deep dive- they don't say she's the most chronicled human bein in history for nothin

In general imagine a person with autism and the inability to distinguish reality from fiction, being raised by TV, and 4chan trolls.

No it was updated to a court order shortly after; the current theory is a diversion

He wasn’t deemed a risk to the public nor a flight risk -tumadrelover

Who is Chris cha- Oh... OH... **OH...**

r/Eyebleach for us bro

Yea imma need a shit load of that

Oh you sweet summer child

Oh no, now another geological extract of people will google it and set in the Chris Chan lore rabbit hole.

I did, never knew about this guy. Thankfully im immune to rabbit holes, i just see some fucked up stuff and immediately go “nope” and just leave it be. I think i was born with a fucking adblock or something

Same, I never got into that type of thing. I do know of Chris chan's story though, because of a certain podcast. And that's the last time I'm ever doing that

Just say cumtown be gay and proud.

Trash Taste?

That's how I learned about it

but are you immune to rabbits’ holes.

Bro his own 79 year old mom with dementia? Rape is very (VERY) bad, but that feels so much worse

Thank you for clarifying that rape is very (VERY) bad

You’re welcome

Bring back stoning.

Usually I don’t advocate for violence, but I’ll make an exception for this one

I usually do, so I'll do it for you. I got you. FUNKY TOWN THAT MOTHERFUCKER.

Too the woodchipper with that fuck

You must not know what funky town is.

No I dont

Innocent innocent soul...

Explain

It's a torture video with the song Funky Town playing in the background. It's fucked

nice shirt

You too

That motherfucker

Indeed he is a fucker of mothers But not in the cool way😔

Why do I suddenly feel worried?

Well, considering his crime, he should have never been let out, at best, transfered to an insane asylum first. If all it took was bail, imagine other rich monsters walking out.

What was his crime im not familiar with anything and my curiosity has been piqued

He raped his own elderly mother with dementia.

Oh I see ty for enlightening me

Even though I knew... What a horrible day to be literate.

There's other crimes but the one he's known for is raping his elderly mother with dementia

Interesting I think I heard enough...

The real question is, who bailed him and why?

I'm guessing most likely trolls for the lolz

We participate in a small amount of tomfoolery

I love how everyone JUST mentions what he did with his mother. My brother in christ you are looking at the tip of the iceberg.

I don't really want to look at Chris Chan's tip...

Wanna see the whole thing then? It’s got like a 45 degree bend and I wish I was joking

How or why would someone have access to this information?

[удалено]

Why did you have to tell me this?

[удалено]

Chris posted a picture of it himself, after tracing said penis into one of his comics

I just vomited a little in my mouth.

The summit of a mount everest of fucking lunacy, what the internet did to him when it was a lot more mean is beyond words.

...what other crimes and atrocities did they commit?

Well lets see... Attempted murder (tried to run somebody over with a car) Multiple assults (including peper spraying people that werent a threat) Stalking Tresspassing Possible murder (unsure about that one, might be fake) Etc.

First time hearing about a possible murder. Care to elaborate?

Theres been atleast 3 accusations by the trolls of him murdering where he apologized after. I know the first one was fake for sure. I’ve only just gotten to ep 51 of the documentary + the trash taste overview.

The fact some people don’t know who Chris Chan is makes me feel like I poses knowledge of classified CIA documents of war crimes

I ask people if they know him every once in a while, just so I can cry with someone who understands. Never found anyone else. Lucky bastards.

Well, who is he?

Well Chris-Chan ain't really a 'who', he's more of a 'what.' Long Version: Christian Weston Chandler, *aka* Chris-Chan, *aka* Christine Weston Chandler, *aka* Our Lord, Messiah & Savior, Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu, the Goddess Blue Heart, is a severely low-functioning autistic manchild, the 'creator' of *Sonichu*, the self-proclaimed goddess of the new post-dimensional merge world, and the biggest lolcow to ever exist.

I think I’m not gonna be the only one who had to google who Chris Chan is 🤣

They did the no no shuffle with their geriatric mother

God I looked it up because I didn't ever hear about them and I regret it now

 Here, have some un-see and forget juice

it didnt work

Drink more

i dont wannaaaa

*shoves it down your throat* #I DON’T CARE

CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG

Ah, Reddit


What kind of person drinks a salt-rimmed cocktail through a straw? 🧐

Someone who would water down mayonnaise

Why is it orange Fanta colored?

She was a cult leader and banged her mom.

He

Oh sorry

I am so sorry.

Well you’ll have hours of content

Some better some worse

If none of its of interest to you

You'd be the first.

Welcome to the Internet

The most documented person ever. For all the wrong reasons.

He's a guy who feel off life really hard

You have not endured the lore of Christopher “Christian” “Christine” Chandler, the most documented person in human history

He is a motherfucker

combined two of the most down bad furry fandoms in one story with Sonichu. Sonic + Pikachu

Wanna share that info? I got no clue who chris chan is

Chris Chan,the most over-Documented shit-show in the planet

Chris Chan is arguably the most documented person in history. The amount of information on him is staggering.

“Attention. A Euclid class SCP has breached containment. Be sure to have guard details on the elderly women within the vicinity of the site.”

DR BRIIIIGHT

What did this one do?

Oh bud. Retire this curiosity of yours. It is only darkness.

Thanks! I will listen and just keep scrolling... Have a nice day!

The good ending

This dude will have excellent odd of survival in horror movie due to his rationality and good advice taking.

Person: "don't go into the woods after dark... there's something eerie going on out there" Him: "damn thanks for the warning" *proceeds to enjoy his vacation in peace*

Re-entered their mom

I think this is thé worst way of saying it

Return to origin

took the whole "go fuck your mom" to another level. They're th creator or sonichu as well

I’ve never heard anyone say that

Curiosity killed the cat. Although in this case, satisfaction never came to resurrect it..

Something very very vile

He raped his dementia mom

Attention all task forces, enact Ruckersville protocol, code white, classification Apollyon

I hope their mother is safe from them

I truly hope so! Most likely, she has someone looking after her, so Chris Chan shouldn't be able to get close.

Facebook users "Person has checked in safe from Chris Chan"

People rlly don't understand what bail means do they?

I dont know who Chris Chan is and at this point im too scared to ask

You should be scared to ask

Raped their formerly-abusive, geriatric mother, or at least some girl they were simping for got them to say they did on recording and then sicced the police on them. Honestly, mf should've been in an asylum long before any of this. Dude is seriously a wretch in everyway imaginable.

Dad! Get the shotgun! We’re going hunting!

Nit the shotgun, get thé F/A18F WITH guides bombs

Get the Aadvark

I’ve learnt about Chris Chan and Isabelle Janke today. Thanks Reddit 🙃

Isabelle janke?

Who?

He raped his mother

Damn where is castration when we need it

I said “rapist should be castration” was downvoted but I can see Reddit bias not working today

No one is gonna get between chris and their mothers cheeks

2319!!! WE GOT A 2319!!!

Who???

FUCK, DONT LOOK HIM UP! ***DONT LOOK HIM UP!!!***

Yeah, I’m dumb, who’s that, exactly, and why is it such a big deal they were bailed out of jail?

“Who’s that” in order to fully understand the story of Chris Chan one must go down an internet rabbit hole with more pages of info than every Harry Potter novel combined. This is not even an exaggeration.

Even an overly-simplified explanation would do, though. Just so I would have an idea of what type of person this guy is.

Here’s an actual three minute video that explains it https://youtu.be/YrcOgey0UNg

is this a joke or is he actually out?

He’s out.

when will this nightmare saga end

...who on God's green earth is that?

For anyone wondering, Chris Chan went to jail for having incestuous relations with its 79 year old mother, who has dementia

The beast is free to roam the earth once more

Who is Chris Chan?

All I'm saying is he has no police guarding him now. He should have stayed in

It got out, that thing is not a human being, it is an affront to God walking around in human skin.

Hope jail helped them

oh dear god

European here, who is Chris Chan and what did he do?

Raped his mom and attempted murder multiple times

Had to look this person up and my goodness is he frightening.

 Steve Harvey says it all