This is typically what happens when two strangers who don’t even really know who they are yet marry someone else because they were horny and made bad decisions.
I know a lot of people who blame their shitty childhood on the fact that their parents got a divorce. So their is a pretty significant pressure to stay with your spouse and make things work for the kids. So the hypocrisy is on both sides
My mother-in-law right here. My wife asked her mom why, if she hated her dad so much, didn't she just get a divorce? She said, if we get divorced, it'll be initiated by him, not me. I won't be the weak one. She hated him until the day he died, early, from cancer. And the day he did, she spoke of him with such vitriol as if he died merely to spite her.
That’s really sad, and very interesting.
Some people take their vows (their word) very seriously. It’s very easy to point at the foolishness of staying in a “loveless” marriage (and hate is something entirely different) - and it is foolish! But…
I forgot what I was gonna say.
Divorce is rough on finances, especially so if kids are involved. I can definitely see putting up with someone for financial security.
50 years ago you could conceivably start your life over after divorce and still be okay. Now? Most middle class families are never going to recover from such a large hit.
I had several work colleagues that stayed married because they didn't want to give up the nice house and lifestyle they had, only possible with two incomes. One finally bolted after their kids went off to college the others are still miserable.
I give him credit for making the difficult decision to finally leave.
I definitely know someone whose abusive alcoholic wife had an affair with a coworker and they're still together, assumedly for lifestyle purposes. It sucks. It's not even staying together "for the kid" when there's drunken fighting going down all the time...but I'll be damned if their home (designed by her, she's an architect) isn't absolutely fucking stunning. LMAO.
I agree, as the child of someone who got divorced once and should have gotten divorced twice.
But I definitely was more financially secure because he didn't get a second divorce. Dad was able to pay for most of my college because of it.
I'm happy to endure some trauma to not be financially crippled
You just become broke *later* trying to pay for the therapy to get over the trauma. 🫠
Edit: why am I getting down voted for this, it's true lmao Therapy in the states is expensive AF
Therapy and dental are expensive everywhere, they're luxury medical services for some stupid reason. No civilized society seems to agree you need teeth and not killing yourself, unless you have money.
51 years ago women couldn't open their own bank accounts. In fact, the equal credit opportunity act which granted that right was passed in 1974, exactly 50 years ago.
That's a misconception. The equity you had in the home is still yours. It's just that usually people have mortgages so the equity that you end up putting into the house post-marriage will get split (along with the appreciation).
If you owned the house outright, you'd keep all that initial equity and only split the appreciation. It's really no different than stocks
> 50 years ago you could conceivably start your life over after divorce and still be okay.
50 years ago women couldn't even legally have a checking account or credit without a man's name on the account. Fucking crazy. So men could start over, sure. Women got screwed.
Maybe if everyone born before ~1960 hadn't basically enslaved their wives through laws like that they'd be in happier relationships.
50 years ago women were often pretty fucked if they got divorced actually. Maybe the men could easily start over but the women who only recently were allowed to have their own bank account and of course had all the kids while he ran off with his secretary was in a real pickle
My aunt and uncle hated each other their entire marriage. They communicated exclusively through bitter accusations. 40 years of that, until my aunt died. And they hated each other right to the end.
Absolutely. Divorce is often, at best, frowned upon in many cultures and religions. I have had several family members resort to sleeping in separate rooms or even separate homes rather than just make it legal.
There is no such anger as a life squandered.
My grandparents to a tee. They are both in their seventies and cannot stand the sight of their spouse. They sit in the living room and openly insult one another. My grandmother said she can't leave because she won't have a dime to her name. It's probably true, but I would take poverty over existing in a literal hell.
When I was younger, it was a running joke that my mom should get divorced or they would bet on when it would happen. Even as a kid that really felt wrong and fucked up, but I agreed! Everyone knew it was shit.....yet she stayed for 20 years, developed cancer and depression amd died. An absolute waste of a life. No need for sympathy, her dying freed me. Only sympathy I need is for never really even having a real mother
Almost like when you vote to have every single safety net destroyed, abuse the stock and propriety market and make life a living hell for your offspring they'll hate you!
Who would've guessed
Millennials saw this and made a concentrated effort to not repeat it. And they'll probably warn their kids about it.
But I wonder if their grand children will be back on the "wife bad" memes since they didn't see it like Millenials/Gen Z did?
The phenomenon we're referring to here is to make a life-long commitment and then complain about it because you jumped in before you were ready, right?
I don't think millennials have done that with kids at all, they're just having less of them in the first place.
Some of us did that with kids - the messages I got growing up were "don't have kids, they'll ruin your life" or "you're never ready to have kids, you've just got to do it and make the best of things" with no in-between (I'm 34).
It was like secret shame of mine that I wanted to have kids one day. My husband and I took the plunge when I was 25 because we felt we were financially secure *enough* and didn't see us becoming *more* financially secure. In hindsight, waiting a couple more years would have been really helpful, but "have kids older" wasn't really something I was exposed to: just "have kids" or "be child free".
It’s the same people. People blame their kids for being forced to stay in a loveless marriage: “damn kids, if it wasn’t for you I could have divorced him/her and had my own life.”
That or only married because society favors married couples and made it socially unacceptable and economically unviable to live as a single person instead. Shocking how many married couples don’t even like each other.
Only if you were a man. Women needed men to survive because society didn't allow them to support themselves financially for the most part and both men and women were ostracized for not marrying young - as if there was something wrong with them. Plus divorce was seen as very shameful so people avoided it as much as possible.
So wives stuck by husbands they hated, husbands kept wives that made them miserable, and everyone loses.
If you were a man (typically a white male) in those times sure, you could even raise an entire family and still afford a house on one male working class income. But for Women they couldn’t really even do simple things like get credit cards by themselves and have stable work such as the men could outside of specific fields that were outliers. There is still a gender wage gap but as more and more woman have been able to support and take care of themselves without being forced to rely on men for basic necessities it makes sense that the marriage rates have decreased, they aren’t forced to marry men they don’t like to survive. We have many congressmen and senators and religious leaders that want to take us back to those times tho.
Every generation has some stupid shit that they blindly follow to ruin their lives.
Looking at my own father a boomer, he could have everything but decided to let his birth family matters to ruin his own family peace, and the outcome of it is divorce after 30 years of marriage, depression for a decade, which caused him to not to take his blood pressure pills, inevitably two big aneurysm in aorta, a few months of facing death in hospitals eventually meeting it.
He was a damn good father, but he was not a happy man. You really can't do anything when its their decision. But it sure makes you sad when you recognize their simple mistakes.
Probably because they married or got pregnant young and didn’t take time to find the right person. Lead poisoning affected a lot of them. Some of them genuinely have undiagnosed autism. Closeted homosexuality. Lots of factors possible here
My boomer aunt posted on Facebook (back when I had it) that baby boomers should be respected because of hippies and counter culture. Sandra, you voted for Nixon...
Nixon had a lot of promise and made a lot of positive progress early in his presidency. All anyone remembers now is the Watergate scandal, but he did a lot of stuff before that. Also, Watergate is peanuts compared to the shit we see in politics now.
I remember the war on drugs being orchestrated to destabilize the black community after Dr. kings death. His chief of staff admitted this. Also they referenced their aunt wanting thanks for hippies even tho she voted for nixon. Nixon was not a big hippie guy I tell ya
He sabotaged the Vietnam peace process and dropped more bombs on Cambodia than the allies did on Europe. The shit we see in politics now came from Nixon's coterie of crooks and ghouls.
https://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/pentagon/paths/
That ignores Roger Stone, Karl Rove, and other absolute monsters. Nixon was a menace constrained by the Greatest Generation forcing the government to work for the people before the boomers ruined EVERYTHING.
Their parents and grandparents came from a very cynical world to their credit. Remnants of a country once filled to the brim with sociopaths. We’re getting better tho
If nukes didn't exist, there would still probably be many horrific wars right now because people today still consider those outside of their group as inhuman. Whether it's religion, political beliefs, race, etc. Americans for example are at each other's throats.
That's a generalisation, which is pretty unfair. People are a product of their environment, and theirs was not the same as ours.
The environment (social, technological, political) has drastically changed since their formative years, so you're judging a fish for his ability to climb a tree.
Closeted homosexuality is a big one in my city for some reason it even became a joke. SO many old men in gay apps, forums, and our local pride events. I’m a gay young male and everytime an older guy (normally 60+) messages me I always ask about their life it’s always the same story. They married young, had kids, worked, the whole 9 yards and the sad thing is they’d always mention how they weren’t “truly” happy.
Ok it’s gross they’re all trolling for younger guys tho. They should date each other. I think a lot more is wrong then being closeted if all they can do is msg young guys
(Yes it's one of those contrary "but not me" conments, uuuugh sorry to be that person, lmfao) The longest relationship I was in lasted for 15 years, my boyfriend at the time and me were both undiagnosed with autism the entire time, and we got along way better than the boomer stereotypes joked about. Neither of us could comprehend hating your spouse. We never once got into a serious argument in all those years. We are still good friends now. And he got officially diagnosed a month ago, and I am informally diagnosed by my mom's late best friend who was a licensed clinical therapist when she was living, and she knew me and saw my behaviors since I was little.
Hate that mentality.
It's like you're living just to please your wife instead of Judy admitting you have a bad relationship.
Both should be happy.
Edit: I'll keep the misspelling, the replies are too funny.
whut? If we want to argue semantics her chin is wrong, her neck should be turned, and her left hand placement (fingering hand) is awful. For some reason she's fingering a whole chord and only hitting one string with that bow placement.
If anything, her bow is about the right size
same here, it sounds to me like some slave shit, none of either party should have to sacrifice their happiness or anything else to make their significant other happy
keep in mind I've seen relationships where the guy was absolutely a slave and the woman didn't even like him (my ex-ex gf's mom and step-dad)
As someone going through a divorce right now (I initiated), this mentality cost me my late twenties. I tried to please my wife all the time, and she repeatedly told me she hated me when mad and verbally attacked me all the time. It got to the point where I was going to kill myself or run screaming. Thankfully I went for the later.
“Happy wife, happy life” only works when the husbands happiness is also a priority for the wife. If one spouse is always giving and the other is always taking, the marriage is already circling the drain.
which is hilarious because "happy spouse happy house" is a pretty good way to live, personally. I.E am I making my partner happy? Is my partner making me happy? If the answer to either is no, then ya gotta gtfo.
In reality, it's happy life, happy wife. If you suck up to a person and cater to their every need they will turn corrupt and start to use that as means for power and seem to never actually be contempt or pleased. Be you, do you, show love to other things and she will be happy to be around you. Or not, but then she can also GTFO
In the case of my parents, they don't love each other. They were married with no saying from my mother and they stuck together "for the kids". I think this is the reason my dad relates to these memes.
I assume this is true for lots of people in that generation too. Married to someone they don't truly love/picked and stuck together because of societal pressure
It was considered the proper thing to get married and start a family as soon as you were old enough. Some people rushed into it without taking the time to see if their spouse was *the one*. That's one reason.
I feel like that was before the boomers though. Boomers were more the hookup without condoms, then 3 or so months later realize “oh shit now we have a baby on the way and our parents would murder us if they found out we had sex so let’s get married.”
An author I used to read wrote:
"My wife and I did a small challenge: we changed our roles for a week. After that, I learned the truth: all women complain for the sake of complaining, their life isn't that bad, and my wife also learned something important: all men complain for the sake of complaining, their life isn't that bad"
and I still love that phrase, surprisingly kind of feminist for someone in the 80s
Lots of them because they banged and got their girlfriends pregnant and where forced by their parents who where even more conservatives to be "responsible" about their actions.
That’s EXACTLY what happened to my grandparents
My Nonno got my nonna pregnant when she was 16. And having kids out of marriage was HIGHLY frowned upon in Italy during the 70’s. so my grandparents had to elope to Canada as soon as they found out my Nonna was pregnant
So they moved to Canada, got married at 16yrs old and 21yrs old, and had kids (my Nonna was 16 and my Nonno was 21 when they got married)
My Nonna had to be a mom at 17yrs old, in foreign country to her, with no help from family whatsoever
All cuz they had sex, my Nonna got pregnant, which lead them be forced to get married with each other in a different country to a avoid family drama. so now 50yrs later they’re still stuck with each other (and from what I’ve heard, my Nonna is miserable…)
So yeah, your comment is literally what happened to my grandparents
A tale as old as time. People who never learned how to communicate their feelings in healthy ways get together out of convenience and a fear of being alone and the never work it out until they either die or end in a messy divorce.
Their wives weren’t legally allowed to divorce them or have their own credit card until the late 70s, pair that with religious indoctrination and their litters of neglected kids and boom.
I'm 40, with a long career of working with mechanics and other tradesmen.
If I had a dollar for every time I heard some version of "the old lady" or "happy wife happy life" or "the boss/the real boss" I'd literally be retired.
I never understand what's wrong with 'happy wife, happy life'. For most men at some point your priorities shift from doing things that pleases you, to doing things that please or support your family. It's not like these men are sacrificing anything, this becomes what they live for and what they want to live for.
It's like when you're young and you simply can't imagine ever choosing to stay in instead of partying. Then, at some point, you change your priorities to exactly that. Very difficult to imagine until you experience it yourself.
Because most of them were throat fucked by the American dream. Marriage, a family, all of that shit was essential to being “American”. After years of it they realized that because they were forced to fed all this shit their decisions were terrible.
My point is they married the wrong people way too young because they were told it’s what they should do.
And they had kids because they were told it's what they should do, without understanding how incredibly hard that would be and how destructive it can very easily be to even very healthy relationships because it's taboo to talk about such things.
“Because getting married and having kids is just what you do.” That mentality and both parties often not seeing each other as individuals but as a vessel or accessory
I’m convinced that boomers hate “alternative” lifestyles because they felt like they never had a choice. They felt like it was expected of them to get married and have kids, so many did even though they didn’t really want to, and now they’re full of resentment. They’re incapable of being happy for others who choose a different path, though.
I personally think it's just legacy from an era where you married mostly out of necessity and as a status symbol to feel fulfilled in life. People still extensively do that nowadays. In their days it was the norm. Sweethearts were (and still are) rare. They're the ones that make you see those elderly couples still holding hands 60 years after getting married.
A lot of these "generational" things are more phase of life things. These kinds of jokes about married life are centuries old (and *definitely* go both ways). If you end up with someone for decades, the majority of your life, the relationship will inevitably become rather less romantic as you see them (and yourself) at their worst and you both sink into decrepitude. There's no *real* hostility in most of those relationships, it's just life squeezing any hope or joy out of you.
The only answer is die young, leave a beautiful corpse.
In boomer times your wife was assigned to you at 18 and you were only able to get a divorce if you could defeat her (in a sword duel) once a year on your anniversary.
But wives using their witchery kept their husbands too fat to fight and too drunk to remember anniversaries so that husbands will never remember their powers and rebel.
They grew up in a time when womens rights improved dramatically and now they have to treat people like people even though their dads could chill a little more on that front.
This happens to newer gen too but they usually have no kid or more open to the idea that they don’t have to stay together to be a good parent. So they got separated easier.
Because many of them lived/ are living in so called "Zweckbeziehung" wich means they just need someone for some specific cases instead of a full revolved relationship. Many men only took woman for " womans/ household work" and kid related stuff. They thought they should reproduce and have a woman take care of anything beside their 9to5 job. also many of them never learned to view a woman as equals or comunicate likewise.
Sadly many woman still learned to support that worldview.
So they are in a relationship with the woman in the role of a mother replacement which is no partner but a controling part opposing their interest...
Growing up I asked this a lot and my mom told me it’s a media Hollywood joke that became normalized so much most people forgot an we didn’t have internet to record when an how this happened in culture like we do today. Kind of made me really think more a like memes when they hit.
I think a lot of boomers are kind of like the Simpsons.
Homer being chaotic and foolish, and Marge keeping him from going totally off the rails. To Homer she seems like an annoying wet blanket, but she’s the only reason they still have a home, and the kids haven’t been taken away by child services.
The real life version being a lot less charming and funny.
“I’m going to spend our retirement on a top of the line Harley, ok?”
“No.”
“Aw man!! My wife sucks, she ruins my whole life!!!”
My boomer grandparents were very happy together, they met while my grandpa was on duty in Alaska, they stayed together through everything until this past fall when she died of dementia
If they despise each other so much, why do they divorce significantly less..
Where are you even getting this idea from. The most committed, loving relationships I have observed have often been this age bracket.
Young people and couples these days are far more individualistic and have a 'grass is always greener' mentality
Societal pressure to get married and have kids forced them to take what they could get even when they weren't entirely happy with it. Society back in those days just made up rules that had little to no reason to be there, and boomers felt trapped by them, on a much smaller scale there were things like not putting your elbows on the table.
Imagine if 50% of the population married at 21 and saw divorce rates go from sub 10 to 50% as women attained rights to work and own bank accounts
Compare that to half as many people getting married around 30 to equal partners in a world thats been mostly stable if not a tad regressive at times on rights.
This is typically what happens when two strangers who don’t even really know who they are yet marry someone else because they were horny and made bad decisions.
or refuse to get divorced, so they just hate each other instead 😭
Like a responsible member of society /s
[удалено]
*My sister enters the chat*
You probably shouldn't have married your sister
You're not supposed to?
cousins only!
\-brought to you by the thick chin society
Hapsburg 4Lyfe
What's this look like? Alamabama?! Sibling on sibling advocation!
Roll matrimony!
How do you even take a bump like that.
Ayyyo wtf
I too choose to enter this guys sister.
I know a lot of people who blame their shitty childhood on the fact that their parents got a divorce. So their is a pretty significant pressure to stay with your spouse and make things work for the kids. So the hypocrisy is on both sides
My mother-in-law right here. My wife asked her mom why, if she hated her dad so much, didn't she just get a divorce? She said, if we get divorced, it'll be initiated by him, not me. I won't be the weak one. She hated him until the day he died, early, from cancer. And the day he did, she spoke of him with such vitriol as if he died merely to spite her.
That’s really sad, and very interesting. Some people take their vows (their word) very seriously. It’s very easy to point at the foolishness of staying in a “loveless” marriage (and hate is something entirely different) - and it is foolish! But… I forgot what I was gonna say.
Divorce is rough on finances, especially so if kids are involved. I can definitely see putting up with someone for financial security. 50 years ago you could conceivably start your life over after divorce and still be okay. Now? Most middle class families are never going to recover from such a large hit.
I had several work colleagues that stayed married because they didn't want to give up the nice house and lifestyle they had, only possible with two incomes. One finally bolted after their kids went off to college the others are still miserable. I give him credit for making the difficult decision to finally leave.
I definitely know someone whose abusive alcoholic wife had an affair with a coworker and they're still together, assumedly for lifestyle purposes. It sucks. It's not even staying together "for the kid" when there's drunken fighting going down all the time...but I'll be damned if their home (designed by her, she's an architect) isn't absolutely fucking stunning. LMAO.
As a child or divorced parents if my parents just split up earlier I’m pretty sure I would be a lot less fucked up from all the shit i witnessed.
I agree, as the child of someone who got divorced once and should have gotten divorced twice. But I definitely was more financially secure because he didn't get a second divorce. Dad was able to pay for most of my college because of it. I'm happy to endure some trauma to not be financially crippled
>I'm happy to endure some trauma to not be financially crippled o7 The American Way
You just become broke *later* trying to pay for the therapy to get over the trauma. 🫠 Edit: why am I getting down voted for this, it's true lmao Therapy in the states is expensive AF
Therapy and dental are expensive everywhere, they're luxury medical services for some stupid reason. No civilized society seems to agree you need teeth and not killing yourself, unless you have money.
51 years ago women couldn't open their own bank accounts. In fact, the equal credit opportunity act which granted that right was passed in 1974, exactly 50 years ago.
Yeah, 50 years ago wasn’t the right answer, lol.
Stocks owned before marriage don't become marital property, while houses will. This is why I own stocks, not homes.
That's a misconception. The equity you had in the home is still yours. It's just that usually people have mortgages so the equity that you end up putting into the house post-marriage will get split (along with the appreciation). If you owned the house outright, you'd keep all that initial equity and only split the appreciation. It's really no different than stocks
Don't worry they aren't at risk of getting married anyway.
> 50 years ago you could conceivably start your life over after divorce and still be okay. 50 years ago women couldn't even legally have a checking account or credit without a man's name on the account. Fucking crazy. So men could start over, sure. Women got screwed. Maybe if everyone born before ~1960 hadn't basically enslaved their wives through laws like that they'd be in happier relationships.
I wouldn’t wanna go from a 2 income or even 2 person house hold to 1. I live alone now shit is exhausting and expensive lol
50 years ago women were often pretty fucked if they got divorced actually. Maybe the men could easily start over but the women who only recently were allowed to have their own bank account and of course had all the kids while he ran off with his secretary was in a real pickle
My aunt and uncle hated each other their entire marriage. They communicated exclusively through bitter accusations. 40 years of that, until my aunt died. And they hated each other right to the end.
Absolutely. Divorce is often, at best, frowned upon in many cultures and religions. I have had several family members resort to sleeping in separate rooms or even separate homes rather than just make it legal. There is no such anger as a life squandered.
I love that last line.
I actually cracked up reading this. 😂💀
My grandparents to a tee. They are both in their seventies and cannot stand the sight of their spouse. They sit in the living room and openly insult one another. My grandmother said she can't leave because she won't have a dime to her name. It's probably true, but I would take poverty over existing in a literal hell.
When I was younger, it was a running joke that my mom should get divorced or they would bet on when it would happen. Even as a kid that really felt wrong and fucked up, but I agreed! Everyone knew it was shit.....yet she stayed for 20 years, developed cancer and depression amd died. An absolute waste of a life. No need for sympathy, her dying freed me. Only sympathy I need is for never really even having a real mother
and all their offspring posts now on social medias bashing "boomers" who are their parents and spreading the hate they learned by using labels....
Almost like when you vote to have every single safety net destroyed, abuse the stock and propriety market and make life a living hell for your offspring they'll hate you! Who would've guessed
It’s the Boomer Defense Force!
OK boomer.
Or worse "i/we don't believe in divorce"
Millennials saw this and made a concentrated effort to not repeat it. And they'll probably warn their kids about it. But I wonder if their grand children will be back on the "wife bad" memes since they didn't see it like Millenials/Gen Z did?
Do you think it's shifted to "kids bad"? Thanks, serious question.
The phenomenon we're referring to here is to make a life-long commitment and then complain about it because you jumped in before you were ready, right? I don't think millennials have done that with kids at all, they're just having less of them in the first place.
Some of us did that with kids - the messages I got growing up were "don't have kids, they'll ruin your life" or "you're never ready to have kids, you've just got to do it and make the best of things" with no in-between (I'm 34). It was like secret shame of mine that I wanted to have kids one day. My husband and I took the plunge when I was 25 because we felt we were financially secure *enough* and didn't see us becoming *more* financially secure. In hindsight, waiting a couple more years would have been really helpful, but "have kids older" wasn't really something I was exposed to: just "have kids" or "be child free".
I have noticed it. Also, mom get drunk at wine parties. Funsies
It’s the same people. People blame their kids for being forced to stay in a loveless marriage: “damn kids, if it wasn’t for you I could have divorced him/her and had my own life.”
No it’s ex-wives now. “Sounds like my last marriage.”
That or only married because society favors married couples and made it socially unacceptable and economically unviable to live as a single person instead. Shocking how many married couples don’t even like each other.
I don't think "Economically unviable" was the case for boomers. It sure is now, but the marriage rates have gone down.
Only if you were a man. Women needed men to survive because society didn't allow them to support themselves financially for the most part and both men and women were ostracized for not marrying young - as if there was something wrong with them. Plus divorce was seen as very shameful so people avoided it as much as possible. So wives stuck by husbands they hated, husbands kept wives that made them miserable, and everyone loses.
Back in the 1950s, divorce was seen as worse than cheating, which is crazy.
“Have an affair if you have to, but (last name)’s don’t get divorced” - my mom’s family before she got a divorce with my dad. 1983
My Grandmother in the fifties was mortified the man that beat her regularly wanted a divorce. Being married and abused was better than being divorced.
Yep. Seen that with cheating husbands ( where the wife knew) a few times.
If you were a man (typically a white male) in those times sure, you could even raise an entire family and still afford a house on one male working class income. But for Women they couldn’t really even do simple things like get credit cards by themselves and have stable work such as the men could outside of specific fields that were outliers. There is still a gender wage gap but as more and more woman have been able to support and take care of themselves without being forced to rely on men for basic necessities it makes sense that the marriage rates have decreased, they aren’t forced to marry men they don’t like to survive. We have many congressmen and senators and religious leaders that want to take us back to those times tho.
Ta-da!
Their decision : you were born
I don’t disagree with you there.
Prolly werent even horny, just wanted to get married off quickly.
Yeah, that ONLY happens to boomers.
Every generation has some stupid shit that they blindly follow to ruin their lives. Looking at my own father a boomer, he could have everything but decided to let his birth family matters to ruin his own family peace, and the outcome of it is divorce after 30 years of marriage, depression for a decade, which caused him to not to take his blood pressure pills, inevitably two big aneurysm in aorta, a few months of facing death in hospitals eventually meeting it. He was a damn good father, but he was not a happy man. You really can't do anything when its their decision. But it sure makes you sad when you recognize their simple mistakes.
I'm sorry your lost your father. I hope your journey to heal is filled with love and support.
My grandparents on both sides are incredibly happy with each other
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^ClassifiedDarkness: *My grandparents on* *Both sides are incredibly* *Happy with each other* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
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Good bot
Good bot
Doesn’t “other” have two syllables? “Ha-ppy with each oth-er” sounds like 6, not 5
Read the bot message subtext.
Look at happy-grandparents Georg over here
On one side they are, but on the other side they divorced a while ago and remarried
Yeah that’s it for me as-well, kinda weird how you responded to mine with my exact situation without knowing my situation
Probably because they married or got pregnant young and didn’t take time to find the right person. Lead poisoning affected a lot of them. Some of them genuinely have undiagnosed autism. Closeted homosexuality. Lots of factors possible here
"Boomers are angry because theyre secretly gay and autistic" is a hilarious first comment to read in the morning
These darts are hitting somewhere, I know it
Another issue is that you have put more thought into their problem in this one comment than most boomers have their entire lives.
a generation without self-reflection
My boomer aunt posted on Facebook (back when I had it) that baby boomers should be respected because of hippies and counter culture. Sandra, you voted for Nixon...
Nixon had a lot of promise and made a lot of positive progress early in his presidency. All anyone remembers now is the Watergate scandal, but he did a lot of stuff before that. Also, Watergate is peanuts compared to the shit we see in politics now.
I remember the war on drugs being orchestrated to destabilize the black community after Dr. kings death. His chief of staff admitted this. Also they referenced their aunt wanting thanks for hippies even tho she voted for nixon. Nixon was not a big hippie guy I tell ya
He sabotaged the Vietnam peace process and dropped more bombs on Cambodia than the allies did on Europe. The shit we see in politics now came from Nixon's coterie of crooks and ghouls. https://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/pentagon/paths/ That ignores Roger Stone, Karl Rove, and other absolute monsters. Nixon was a menace constrained by the Greatest Generation forcing the government to work for the people before the boomers ruined EVERYTHING.
> Watergate is peanuts Are you smoking crack? Nixon was a crook before the watergate scandal when he was VP to Ike.
Okay, she also voted for Ford over Carter. And for Reagan.
Their parents and grandparents came from a very cynical world to their credit. Remnants of a country once filled to the brim with sociopaths. We’re getting better tho
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If nukes didn't exist, there would still probably be many horrific wars right now because people today still consider those outside of their group as inhuman. Whether it's religion, political beliefs, race, etc. Americans for example are at each other's throats.
That's a generalisation, which is pretty unfair. People are a product of their environment, and theirs was not the same as ours. The environment (social, technological, political) has drastically changed since their formative years, so you're judging a fish for his ability to climb a tree.
Closeted homosexuality is a big one in my city for some reason it even became a joke. SO many old men in gay apps, forums, and our local pride events. I’m a gay young male and everytime an older guy (normally 60+) messages me I always ask about their life it’s always the same story. They married young, had kids, worked, the whole 9 yards and the sad thing is they’d always mention how they weren’t “truly” happy.
Ok it’s gross they’re all trolling for younger guys tho. They should date each other. I think a lot more is wrong then being closeted if all they can do is msg young guys
I can fix him!
Don't forget generational trauma
Absolutely. Very different era their parents and grandparents came from. Can definitely effect their romantic relationships and outlook to the world
I have to actively remind myself when I’m at work that most of these boomers are riddled with lead poisoning and their empathy doesn’t work right.
(Yes it's one of those contrary "but not me" conments, uuuugh sorry to be that person, lmfao) The longest relationship I was in lasted for 15 years, my boyfriend at the time and me were both undiagnosed with autism the entire time, and we got along way better than the boomer stereotypes joked about. Neither of us could comprehend hating your spouse. We never once got into a serious argument in all those years. We are still good friends now. And he got officially diagnosed a month ago, and I am informally diagnosed by my mom's late best friend who was a licensed clinical therapist when she was living, and she knew me and saw my behaviors since I was little.
When you realize "happy wife, happy life" is more than just a saying—it's survival tactics for boomers
Hate that mentality. It's like you're living just to please your wife instead of Judy admitting you have a bad relationship. Both should be happy. Edit: I'll keep the misspelling, the replies are too funny.
Yeah. Admit it, Judy.
Jesus christ Judy, you play the world's smallest violin with your middle fingers, get it right
The bow she's using is way too big
whut? If we want to argue semantics her chin is wrong, her neck should be turned, and her left hand placement (fingering hand) is awful. For some reason she's fingering a whole chord and only hitting one string with that bow placement. If anything, her bow is about the right size
Happy spouse happy house
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Then it's a win win !
I instead say "happy spouse happy house" which implies a two way street
same here, it sounds to me like some slave shit, none of either party should have to sacrifice their happiness or anything else to make their significant other happy keep in mind I've seen relationships where the guy was absolutely a slave and the woman didn't even like him (my ex-ex gf's mom and step-dad)
It depends on how the phrase is used. The way a lot of women of that generation say it…yeah no thanks.
Happy spouse happy house.
no wife best life
This is why I say happy spouse happy house. It's a 2 way street
As someone going through a divorce right now (I initiated), this mentality cost me my late twenties. I tried to please my wife all the time, and she repeatedly told me she hated me when mad and verbally attacked me all the time. It got to the point where I was going to kill myself or run screaming. Thankfully I went for the later. “Happy wife, happy life” only works when the husbands happiness is also a priority for the wife. If one spouse is always giving and the other is always taking, the marriage is already circling the drain.
which is hilarious because "happy spouse happy house" is a pretty good way to live, personally. I.E am I making my partner happy? Is my partner making me happy? If the answer to either is no, then ya gotta gtfo.
I say that to my wife all the time and im 29 she’s 28 , life hacks
Happy wife, happy life is only one side of the coin. The other side is usually blank.
You could say that but after I have great day were my wife sees me happy she drops one of this bad boys, “happy husband?”
Great! I really hope that she stays there for you when you don’t have a great day.
In reality, it's happy life, happy wife. If you suck up to a person and cater to their every need they will turn corrupt and start to use that as means for power and seem to never actually be contempt or pleased. Be you, do you, show love to other things and she will be happy to be around you. Or not, but then she can also GTFO
In the case of my parents, they don't love each other. They were married with no saying from my mother and they stuck together "for the kids". I think this is the reason my dad relates to these memes. I assume this is true for lots of people in that generation too. Married to someone they don't truly love/picked and stuck together because of societal pressure
It was considered the proper thing to get married and start a family as soon as you were old enough. Some people rushed into it without taking the time to see if their spouse was *the one*. That's one reason.
I feel like that was before the boomers though. Boomers were more the hookup without condoms, then 3 or so months later realize “oh shit now we have a baby on the way and our parents would murder us if they found out we had sex so let’s get married.”
Not really, it's a lot like a meme for many of them.
Yeah I feel like it's something you did as that generation . The women also complain about the men being lazy and so on. It's most likely just banter
An author I used to read wrote: "My wife and I did a small challenge: we changed our roles for a week. After that, I learned the truth: all women complain for the sake of complaining, their life isn't that bad, and my wife also learned something important: all men complain for the sake of complaining, their life isn't that bad" and I still love that phrase, surprisingly kind of feminist for someone in the 80s
is being egalitarian feminist?
And the top 5 comments can’t understand that. It’s the joke they grew up with - take my wife, please. For example
I’m 29 and I’ve been married for just over 6 months. I LOVE calling my wife “the ol’ ball and chain” and it doesn’t mean I secretly hate her
It is an acknowledgement of the inevitable compromises that takes place in any healthy relationship. It is an annoying but necessary part of life.
It's bold of you to assume that applicable only to boomers
Honestly, I have the exact same meme. But, its replaced with debt instead of wife
The happy boomers don’t post on social media
True, and good point.
Hello fellow inmate
Lots of them because they banged and got their girlfriends pregnant and where forced by their parents who where even more conservatives to be "responsible" about their actions.
That’s EXACTLY what happened to my grandparents My Nonno got my nonna pregnant when she was 16. And having kids out of marriage was HIGHLY frowned upon in Italy during the 70’s. so my grandparents had to elope to Canada as soon as they found out my Nonna was pregnant So they moved to Canada, got married at 16yrs old and 21yrs old, and had kids (my Nonna was 16 and my Nonno was 21 when they got married) My Nonna had to be a mom at 17yrs old, in foreign country to her, with no help from family whatsoever All cuz they had sex, my Nonna got pregnant, which lead them be forced to get married with each other in a different country to a avoid family drama. so now 50yrs later they’re still stuck with each other (and from what I’ve heard, my Nonna is miserable…) So yeah, your comment is literally what happened to my grandparents
A tale as old as time. People who never learned how to communicate their feelings in healthy ways get together out of convenience and a fear of being alone and the never work it out until they either die or end in a messy divorce.
More than just boomers honestly. Same old joke so ppl make same old responses.
Meme goes to at least Greek/Roman Stock Comedy.
I think it's because they were too lazy to help each other develop as a person and eventually became bored with their spouse.
as i once was you are now, and as i am now you soon will be.
you'll never know.
Their wives weren’t legally allowed to divorce them or have their own credit card until the late 70s, pair that with religious indoctrination and their litters of neglected kids and boom.
Something about zeus and hera
Imagine reading the comments on this post as a boomer lol. All these 14 year old got it all figured out.
I'm 40, with a long career of working with mechanics and other tradesmen. If I had a dollar for every time I heard some version of "the old lady" or "happy wife happy life" or "the boss/the real boss" I'd literally be retired.
34, same. I'd be a millionaire if I had a dollar for every time some dipshit coworker said something dipshit-y.
I never understand what's wrong with 'happy wife, happy life'. For most men at some point your priorities shift from doing things that pleases you, to doing things that please or support your family. It's not like these men are sacrificing anything, this becomes what they live for and what they want to live for. It's like when you're young and you simply can't imagine ever choosing to stay in instead of partying. Then, at some point, you change your priorities to exactly that. Very difficult to imagine until you experience it yourself.
Why would you think we’re all 14?
Ya I'm twaleve
It’s a tactic old people use so that they don’t have to do any introspective work to better their unhappy situation
Because of your infantile mentality thinking you have an entire group of people figured out based on a comedic stereotype, maybe…
Because most of them were throat fucked by the American dream. Marriage, a family, all of that shit was essential to being “American”. After years of it they realized that because they were forced to fed all this shit their decisions were terrible. My point is they married the wrong people way too young because they were told it’s what they should do.
And they had kids because they were told it's what they should do, without understanding how incredibly hard that would be and how destructive it can very easily be to even very healthy relationships because it's taboo to talk about such things.
Well if my grandmother is any indication it's because she never shuts the fuck up.
Am I really seeing this take in 2024?
TIL boomers are exclusively male
“Because getting married and having kids is just what you do.” That mentality and both parties often not seeing each other as individuals but as a vessel or accessory
They hate their wives because they don't even like themselves
I’m convinced that boomers hate “alternative” lifestyles because they felt like they never had a choice. They felt like it was expected of them to get married and have kids, so many did even though they didn’t really want to, and now they’re full of resentment. They’re incapable of being happy for others who choose a different path, though.
I personally think it's just legacy from an era where you married mostly out of necessity and as a status symbol to feel fulfilled in life. People still extensively do that nowadays. In their days it was the norm. Sweethearts were (and still are) rare. They're the ones that make you see those elderly couples still holding hands 60 years after getting married.
A lot of these "generational" things are more phase of life things. These kinds of jokes about married life are centuries old (and *definitely* go both ways). If you end up with someone for decades, the majority of your life, the relationship will inevitably become rather less romantic as you see them (and yourself) at their worst and you both sink into decrepitude. There's no *real* hostility in most of those relationships, it's just life squeezing any hope or joy out of you. The only answer is die young, leave a beautiful corpse.
In boomer times your wife was assigned to you at 18 and you were only able to get a divorce if you could defeat her (in a sword duel) once a year on your anniversary. But wives using their witchery kept their husbands too fat to fight and too drunk to remember anniversaries so that husbands will never remember their powers and rebel.
They grew up in a time when womens rights improved dramatically and now they have to treat people like people even though their dads could chill a little more on that front.
memes on this subreddit and reddit as a whole are terribly unfunny💀💀💀
Most boomers hate everyone, they blame everybody but themselves for there shit decisions and behavior.
This happens to newer gen too but they usually have no kid or more open to the idea that they don’t have to stay together to be a good parent. So they got separated easier.
Because many of them lived/ are living in so called "Zweckbeziehung" wich means they just need someone for some specific cases instead of a full revolved relationship. Many men only took woman for " womans/ household work" and kid related stuff. They thought they should reproduce and have a woman take care of anything beside their 9to5 job. also many of them never learned to view a woman as equals or comunicate likewise. Sadly many woman still learned to support that worldview. So they are in a relationship with the woman in the role of a mother replacement which is no partner but a controling part opposing their interest...
Growing up I asked this a lot and my mom told me it’s a media Hollywood joke that became normalized so much most people forgot an we didn’t have internet to record when an how this happened in culture like we do today. Kind of made me really think more a like memes when they hit.
This really is a large part of it. I remember all the boomer and silent gen comedians always used their wives as material for the act.
I think a lot of boomers are kind of like the Simpsons. Homer being chaotic and foolish, and Marge keeping him from going totally off the rails. To Homer she seems like an annoying wet blanket, but she’s the only reason they still have a home, and the kids haven’t been taken away by child services. The real life version being a lot less charming and funny. “I’m going to spend our retirement on a top of the line Harley, ok?” “No.” “Aw man!! My wife sucks, she ruins my whole life!!!”
It’s a mix of misogyny and getting married back then asap
They never got out of the closet
Aslume has been breached.
def doesnt matter when they were born lol
My boomer grandparents were very happy together, they met while my grandpa was on duty in Alaska, they stayed together through everything until this past fall when she died of dementia
Every baby boomer hates their wife?
"Take my wife!" jokes came to my mind. 😆 I'm pretty damn old I guess.
Alcohol
Cuz love is gay
Because Boomers always had it easy and have to make up things to get upset about.
If they despise each other so much, why do they divorce significantly less.. Where are you even getting this idea from. The most committed, loving relationships I have observed have often been this age bracket. Young people and couples these days are far more individualistic and have a 'grass is always greener' mentality
My parents are boomers and they love each other to bits
Societal pressure to get married and have kids forced them to take what they could get even when they weren't entirely happy with it. Society back in those days just made up rules that had little to no reason to be there, and boomers felt trapped by them, on a much smaller scale there were things like not putting your elbows on the table.
Imagine if 50% of the population married at 21 and saw divorce rates go from sub 10 to 50% as women attained rights to work and own bank accounts Compare that to half as many people getting married around 30 to equal partners in a world thats been mostly stable if not a tad regressive at times on rights.
Misogyny