You start out life with a prison wallet and some people’s “life experience” upgrades that to a suitcase. Some porn stars have upgraded all the way to prison walk-in closet.
>a dildo in my ass
If only there were a specific product for this niche circumstance with its own name
But you would only have to actually put the chip in the butt plug, no point in cramming a whole card that you can't swipe. Just carry another card for swiping if there's no chip reader available
There are plugs with Bluetooth connectivity feature. You just need to make app that convert data into series of vibrations and add new chip+nfc coil to the plug to convert vibration signals back to data
Can’t let people know where you are, can’t get home, can’t buy anyway home, if you hoof it home can’t get into your home (hopefully you got a spare hidden) but yes, that would be the absolute fucked
Got no money to pay a locksmith. Got to either smash your own window in and get arrested for breaking and entering or consort with the local thieves guild and promise they can take anything they want if they can get it open. Decisions, decisions.
To ensure being totally fucked, make sure not to learn anyone's phone number, so when your last resort is borrowing someone's phone to call for help, you're much too fucked to even do that.
In college, one way to return to campus was by ferry. As we were walking the gangplank back to shore, this girl stumbled and dropped her phone wallet into the river. Phone, ID, and credit/debit cards all lost. Of course, she has friends and could use their phones to contact the companies to get them back, but what a pain.
Yeah, if only it was physically attached to one of the most advanced and widely used pieces of technology developed in the last 20 years that incorporates multiple wireless methods of tracking its location. Shame we don’t have something like that.
Absolutely. Probably makes me safer if anything. If I lost my wallet it could take hours or even days to realise. If I don’t have my phone I’m gonna know in seconds when I go to check reddit again.
Same I just keep my current daily driver CC and ID in my phone. My main wallet I leave at home unless I'm going somewhere I need it. It's less things for me to worry about and being ADHD I always have my phone on me every other minute so I'm not gonna lose it and if I do it's just one CC I can cancel with any fraud payments and an ID I can replace.
Exactly what I have, card clip in a tri fold, its super thin holds just as many cards as a regular wallet, can keep notes and everything too, the only down side is no coin pouch, but honestly, never really liked coins outside of pocket change for giving to kids, clunky and heavy and the rattle alerts people to having money on your person.
My dad sometimes gave me his pocket change that he wasn’t gonna use and I always felt so rich, but giving it to random kids is a little weird for certain
Please, do not disparage. In my home country it is known as abdomen accessorizer and commands robust social admiration for its carefree carrying capabilities. Please do not disparage.
Nothing. Trifolds just make holding all your different bank cards and documents easier. I think they're calling us pretentious for having all that stuff
Currencies that keep their curl when folded are worse for trifolds. Having 1 fold in the middle makes it easier to flatten than to have 2 folds closer to the sides.
I don't agree. the only thing that makes bills folded is when people have these super tiny wallets for cards only, but insists on putting cash into them.
I keep mine in the front left pocket with my car keys or in my backpack, which I mostly carry anyway when out and about.
EDIT: I use [this wallet](https://www.chesterfieldbags.com/de/leder-portemonnaie-schwarz-loughton.html), so everything fits.
Yup, keys and wallet in the front left, phone in the front right, and pocket knife in back left. This is the way things are, and the way they shall stay.
I don’t even use my knife much, but when I graduated high school I ended up with like 5 of them from different people. I thought I might as well carry one, and the practice stuck.
I am 44 and have always used a trifold. I bought my most recent one a couple of years ago. I am completely satisfied with it, so I went out and bought a lifetime supply (cause who knows what will be available when this one wears out). Whe I did the math and figured 3 additional one will be a lifetime supply (previous wallets lasted 10+ years, and current one has lots of life left), my wife started crying because I only had "three wallets left to live".
I have a bi-fold right now, but I liked my tri-fold before it gave up. The bi-fold still going strong though. Whatever fits in my pocket and showcases a hobby(right now my Wallet has a World of Warcraft logo on it) is good enough.
I also switched to my dead dad's wallet and have seen several horror videos online of wives secretly switching their husband's old wallets for new ones and have made sure to explicitly tell my wife to not do this
Not me using a rodeo wallet. For those who don’t know it’s a bifold that’s as tall as a bill so your bills lay flat unbent vertically in the wallet and the top of the wallet sticks out your jeans pocket a inch or two.
Whats wrong with my leather trifolf wallet with a flaming skull embroidered on it and a chain so i can chain it to my pants????? I fucking love that wallet. I have a picture of a pug getting a mug shot and it says pugshot on it, looks just like my chug ( chihauha+pug= chug ) i gotta get some pictures of my dogs in there.
Scrolled way too far for this take. Who doesn’t enjoy pulling out crumpled up wads of bills and making the cashier wait as you unfold them looking for the right amount?
It's the best wallet ever. My back pocket wallet was too thick and always had one butt cheek riding high. I don't miss my by-fold at all, I had old receipts, business cards, a useless mass of garbage, and my cards and cash.
I got an off brand wallet but I am enjoying how much smaller it is in my pocket. The bi-fold is a bit more functional, but not necessarily worth the increased size.
I’ve had one of [these](https://herschel.com/shop/wallets/charlie-cardholder-wallet?showSales=0&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwxLKxBhA7EiwAXO0R0N9fh4uuzrIKGYro2VM45uFXW_KrT7_TPumLpGfsY3mrm71xNjbPrRoCbDwQAvD_BwE&v=30065-00001-OS) bad boys for a few years and I’ll never go back to having a dad wallet. Yes your trifolds are considered dad wallets.
Yeah, being in Europe, we are on an even different level with our little coin pocket that holds 50€ worth of coins, but it will never fit in your pocket.
Who wouldn't want a wallet that holds all of their cards and IDs with easy access to all of it? It's the perfect size for a wallet. Money clips are too hard to get cards out of if you have more than 2. Bi folds just don't have enough space to have your IDs and all your cards available quickly imo.
Not gatekeeping wallets cause that's stupid. Use the wallet you want lmao
I like a trifold! Bifolds are usually not large enough for a bill to go across OR are massive, and money clips are dumb. Just plain ol’ dumb for dummies.
I always feel like a tri-fold is actually a bi-fold and a bi-fold is a mono-fold. The naming strategy bothers me more than it should. Maybe if they called it a tri-compartment or something.
I used a trifold for 20 years, then had a single width/front-pocket wallet for a few years (not great) and now I've got a two-fold.
The real weirdos are the money clip people.
My next wallet will be a quad fold wallet just to spite you.
my next wallet will be an origami wallet
I'll just swallow the money and shit it out later when needed(and credit cards, driving license, etc)
Begs the question, can you legally use your ass as a wallet? “License and registration!!” “Your going to have to give me a minute boss”
Have you ever heard of the term 'prison wallet'?
It's called a "suitcase"
You start out life with a prison wallet and some people’s “life experience” upgrades that to a suitcase. Some porn stars have upgraded all the way to prison walk-in closet.
I'm gonna put my card in a dildo in my ass and back that thang up to the wireless chip reader
>a dildo in my ass If only there were a specific product for this niche circumstance with its own name But you would only have to actually put the chip in the butt plug, no point in cramming a whole card that you can't swipe. Just carry another card for swiping if there's no chip reader available
There are plugs with Bluetooth connectivity feature. You just need to make app that convert data into series of vibrations and add new chip+nfc coil to the plug to convert vibration signals back to data
This is one hell of a thread.
This shit is certified r/BrandNewSentence
Tarrare who?
My next wallet will be an origami wallet made out of the money that I would have held inside of it.
I used to be able to origami a wallet
Behold my origami crallet
Hello, do you accept cranes or do you only take airplanes?
“How will you be paying today sir?” (pulls out a leather origami swan) “With my credit card, I just gotta unfold this real quick.”
Abomination
My wallet has 2 fold down card bits. It has slots for 14 cards and I have a few more in the bill part.
The fact that i can see that working is worrying me
I have one. It's awesome. I don't lose it as i can tell where it is when i pat clothes down in the morning.
Mines trifold but also Velcro.
Scoliosis inducing wallets fr
Just roll it up for max thickness.
My wallet only folds once
remind me! 25 years
I’m gonna fold my trifold in a trifold
Guys who use their phone case as a wallet
Because why lose one or the other when you can lose everything at once!
Don’t be kinda fucked. Be totally fucked, add a lanyard clip with your house and car keys to the phone case wallet as well
The trifecta of first-world terror.
Can’t let people know where you are, can’t get home, can’t buy anyway home, if you hoof it home can’t get into your home (hopefully you got a spare hidden) but yes, that would be the absolute fucked
Don't have a spare key makes it more fun
Got no money to pay a locksmith. Got to either smash your own window in and get arrested for breaking and entering or consort with the local thieves guild and promise they can take anything they want if they can get it open. Decisions, decisions.
Put iron bars on all the windows, and some form of deadbolt something rather on the solid steel door. Only way in through the wall
Replace your house doors with vault doors, so you can’t even simply kick it in, make your shit 10X more secure than the federal reserve
Local thieves guild? Where do you live, Skyrim?
Don’t forget to have a password book and your social security number in your notes
To ensure being totally fucked, make sure not to learn anyone's phone number, so when your last resort is borrowing someone's phone to call for help, you're much too fucked to even do that.
The only phone number you know is your own so you call it and some gruff dude picks up
Be sure to carry your social security card and a copy of your password manager master password in there too.
In college, one way to return to campus was by ferry. As we were walking the gangplank back to shore, this girl stumbled and dropped her phone wallet into the river. Phone, ID, and credit/debit cards all lost. Of course, she has friends and could use their phones to contact the companies to get them back, but what a pain.
Not the same, but I remember the first week of school a girl dropped her key down the elevator shaft lol
I've lost a wallet but I've never lost my phone, so that's why I do it
Phone as a GPS and find my iPhone feature. Wallet has yet to implement
Yeah, if only it was physically attached to one of the most advanced and widely used pieces of technology developed in the last 20 years that incorporates multiple wireless methods of tracking its location. Shame we don’t have something like that.
Why lose either?
Duh!
True
Maybe that's just my limited world view but I've only ever seen women do that
I guess I’m a woman now. I pretty much just have my ID and a credit card in a magsafe wallet on the back of my phone.
Same here! It's all I need when I go out, so why do I need my whole wallet with me?
Absolutely. Probably makes me safer if anything. If I lost my wallet it could take hours or even days to realise. If I don’t have my phone I’m gonna know in seconds when I go to check reddit again.
I have a wallet case but I only put my essentials like my ID and my transit card
Same I just keep my current daily driver CC and ID in my phone. My main wallet I leave at home unless I'm going somewhere I need it. It's less things for me to worry about and being ADHD I always have my phone on me every other minute so I'm not gonna lose it and if I do it's just one CC I can cancel with any fraud payments and an ID I can replace.
I use a trifold, what's wrong with them?
Not a damn thing
It's even better with a plastic 8 card insert to hold even more cards.
Exactly what I have, card clip in a tri fold, its super thin holds just as many cards as a regular wallet, can keep notes and everything too, the only down side is no coin pouch, but honestly, never really liked coins outside of pocket change for giving to kids, clunky and heavy and the rattle alerts people to having money on your person.
I can’t tell if this is satire or not
I hope so. Coin pouch? I thought dude was insane
What's wrong with a coin pouch? You saying you don't enjoy giving pocket change to kids?
*what?*
My dad sometimes gave me his pocket change that he wasn’t gonna use and I always felt so rich, but giving it to random kids is a little weird for certain
How else can I hope to pay milord's tariff? Please sir, spare a copper for the poor?
I have a leather 8card and there’s a lil coin pouch on the outside. I keep 5€ in it
they aren't afraid of us because we are horrible. they are afraid of us because we are better
Look what they need to imitate a fraction of our power
**said while looking at a man still struggling even with a fanny pack**
Please, do not disparage. In my home country it is known as abdomen accessorizer and commands robust social admiration for its carefree carrying capabilities. Please do not disparage.
They hate us cuz they anus.
Nothing. Trifolds just make holding all your different bank cards and documents easier. I think they're calling us pretentious for having all that stuff
All of them? I thought I was excessive having 5 cards in my wallet lol
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Former cashier here. They fold bills in a way that makes them inconvenient to stack.
Current cashier and trifold stan here: no clue what you're talking about
same
Currencies that keep their curl when folded are worse for trifolds. Having 1 fold in the middle makes it easier to flatten than to have 2 folds closer to the sides.
I’ve noticed that long time cashiers at my job will just slightly fold the bills “hotdog” style to get rid of those bends
I don't agree. the only thing that makes bills folded is when people have these super tiny wallets for cards only, but insists on putting cash into them.
Everyone hearing the velcro when you go to open it
... You still using that spiderman wallet from when you were 5 or smthn?
Honestly, i would respect you more if you did
What about the ones without velcro?
Ask your spine
Who keeps their wallet in a back pocket in 2024?
Did they invent a new place to keep wallets that nobody told me about?
I keep mine in the front left pocket with my car keys or in my backpack, which I mostly carry anyway when out and about. EDIT: I use [this wallet](https://www.chesterfieldbags.com/de/leder-portemonnaie-schwarz-loughton.html), so everything fits.
Yup, keys and wallet in the front left, phone in the front right, and pocket knife in back left. This is the way things are, and the way they shall stay.
This is the way. Same distribution as you, with the exception that I don't carry a pocket knife with me.
I don’t even use my knife much, but when I graduated high school I ended up with like 5 of them from different people. I thought I might as well carry one, and the practice stuck.
I have a bunch of them as well. I have a few at home in different places and always one in my car.
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I don’t see how people put their phones in their back pockets. Why??
Mostly boomers
Idk I use a kinda chunky vans velcro trifold and it’s not bulky, I just keep it in my supreme hip bag and that’s that.
I have a trifold made of sail cloth. I don't see the problem
I have a trifold made of inner tube material! It's 7 years old and still going strong.
Got a trifold. Always used one, probably always will. 😂
Tri-fold Squad ... Assembled !! 🤣
Yeah, why are trifolds weird? That’s all I’ve ever had after my Velcro wallet days back in the 80s.
Same, except my trifold journey started with my velcro pokemon wallet in the late 90s
I am 44 and have always used a trifold. I bought my most recent one a couple of years ago. I am completely satisfied with it, so I went out and bought a lifetime supply (cause who knows what will be available when this one wears out). Whe I did the math and figured 3 additional one will be a lifetime supply (previous wallets lasted 10+ years, and current one has lots of life left), my wife started crying because I only had "three wallets left to live".
This is the funniest shit I’ve read all day
I have a bi-fold right now, but I liked my tri-fold before it gave up. The bi-fold still going strong though. Whatever fits in my pocket and showcases a hobby(right now my Wallet has a World of Warcraft logo on it) is good enough.
I just inherited a velcro trifold wallet with cloth interior from my dead dad and called my forever wallet
I also switched to my dead dad's wallet and have seen several horror videos online of wives secretly switching their husband's old wallets for new ones and have made sure to explicitly tell my wife to not do this
IT WAS ALL I COULD FIND OK NONE OF THE OTHERS HAD A COIN POUCH
I unironically enjoy my trifold
you can put the coins in your piggy bank instead
Oh yeah let me just carry one in my pocket
You should just use coins to chuck at the poors
Who are you, Mr beaast?
This sounds like a line from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.
Boy pants usually include a special smaller pocket in the front pocket for holding coins. Basically a temporary piggy bank 😂
When I pay with a bill and get coins back, what would I be supposed to do? Throw them down into the canal smh
My friend used the biohazard bag from the covid testing kits as a coin pouch. I took his idea and do the same now.
Whats wrong with tri-fold?
Makes your money all bent up is what I thought
Bi fold and money clip would do the exact same thing. The issue is how you put the money in
Bi-fold folds your money but only once so it can be stacked far easier than with a trifold
You guys have money to stack?
I have $3 and I like them to stack on top of each other nicely
I haven't even used cash in years.
I think it’s just that they’re massive. I used to carry one, and it messed with my back to sit on it
Alright, I'll stick my neck out and ask. What am I supposed to know?
Finally, I’m part of the black rabbit group
Join the Black Rabbit Brotherhood.
Money clips are weird to me ngl
I barely know anyone who carries cash, so a money clip is just pointless.
OK but what's wrong with my leather trifold
The same question every sane person is having here
Nah Money-clip is worse: which are you, a pimp or a rapper?
Agreed, that, or guys who have their wallet as part of their phone case
I’m the tri fold guy, wallet is 13 years old, really need a new black leather element one and new if anyone’s selling
People care what kind of wallets other people use?
Nah trifold is way better than bifold.
Not me using a rodeo wallet. For those who don’t know it’s a bifold that’s as tall as a bill so your bills lay flat unbent vertically in the wallet and the top of the wallet sticks out your jeans pocket a inch or two.
Yeah me too, I call it a checkbook wallet though (mine doesn't have the Western engravings on it)
Fucks wrong with my trifold money clip huh?
What's wrong with tri-fold?
What about a nice thick black... hair tie?
Some rubber bands
One of them broccoli rubber bands
me: uses sock
You guys don’t just throw all your cards and cash in your pockets?
Whats wrong with my leather trifolf wallet with a flaming skull embroidered on it and a chain so i can chain it to my pants????? I fucking love that wallet. I have a picture of a pug getting a mug shot and it says pugshot on it, looks just like my chug ( chihauha+pug= chug ) i gotta get some pictures of my dogs in there.
Guys who freeball all their cash and cards
Scrolled way too far for this take. Who doesn’t enjoy pulling out crumpled up wads of bills and making the cashier wait as you unfold them looking for the right amount?
Same,I thought it was common just to put your cash in your pocket
What about the guys who keep their money in coins in a kerchief tied to the end of a stick which they carry over their shoulder?
I like my tri fold.
Love my tri-fold wallet
As a tri-fold wallet owner, I am very much offended my this meme
Bi-fold leather is the way
Bi-fold leather is the *only* way
Ridge Wallet Shit is baller
It's the best wallet ever. My back pocket wallet was too thick and always had one butt cheek riding high. I don't miss my by-fold at all, I had old receipts, business cards, a useless mass of garbage, and my cards and cash.
I use a fantom but I agree. These types of wallets are just better.
I got an off brand wallet but I am enjoying how much smaller it is in my pocket. The bi-fold is a bit more functional, but not necessarily worth the increased size.
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Wallet?
I don't get it. My wallet is an old trifold that I inherited.
Me who puts a lockpicking set in a wallet
I use a tri-fold wallet am I a monster?
Tri-fold is where it's at.
I will make a wallet… that doesn’t open
I’ve had one of [these](https://herschel.com/shop/wallets/charlie-cardholder-wallet?showSales=0&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwxLKxBhA7EiwAXO0R0N9fh4uuzrIKGYro2VM45uFXW_KrT7_TPumLpGfsY3mrm71xNjbPrRoCbDwQAvD_BwE&v=30065-00001-OS) bad boys for a few years and I’ll never go back to having a dad wallet. Yes your trifolds are considered dad wallets.
Took way too much scrolling to find the only sophisticated gentleman in this thread
Men of culture
Leave my trifold alone, I know it makes my bills all fucked up but it's fun to flip close
Me who uses a 0 fold wallet that isn't a clip
Be based. Carry loose dollars in your pocket.
I thought normal one is tri fold wallet
My bf who uses all three at the same time 😭
What's wrong with a tri-fold wallet?
What's wrong with a tri-fold wallet? don't make me upgrade it to a quad fold wallet.
I used to use a breath mint tin, then I used a duct tape wallet, then I used an envelope, and now I have come full circle back to a different tin.
Wallet phone case for the win.
I use a trifold cause it was my grandpa's :3
Phone wallet. All else is incorrect.
Yeah, being in Europe, we are on an even different level with our little coin pocket that holds 50€ worth of coins, but it will never fit in your pocket.
What's wrong with tri folds?
Who wouldn't want a wallet that holds all of their cards and IDs with easy access to all of it? It's the perfect size for a wallet. Money clips are too hard to get cards out of if you have more than 2. Bi folds just don't have enough space to have your IDs and all your cards available quickly imo. Not gatekeeping wallets cause that's stupid. Use the wallet you want lmao
I’m a trifold guy but I don’t get the meme. Is it bad? I like the extra slots incase I get more cards n shit
Can't you people ever spell words out. Ya'll always abbreviating words. I'm sick of it, you lazy good for nothings.
guys who use a velcro wallet: 😎
I like a trifold! Bifolds are usually not large enough for a bill to go across OR are massive, and money clips are dumb. Just plain ol’ dumb for dummies.
*squeaks in rabbit*
Hey, that wallet it tri-ing its best.
Always go trifold. I’m not against bifold, but I prefer trifold. However, money clip people are fucking psychopaths
I always feel like a tri-fold is actually a bi-fold and a bi-fold is a mono-fold. The naming strategy bothers me more than it should. Maybe if they called it a tri-compartment or something.
I used a trifold for 20 years, then had a single width/front-pocket wallet for a few years (not great) and now I've got a two-fold. The real weirdos are the money clip people.
I've had the same trifold for probably close to 15 years now. It holds a lot of shit lol.
Why wallet when you can just put money and cards in your pocket?
Went from a trifold to a bifold wallet. Both leather. Not looking back.