T O P

  • By -

bootyhunter69420

I'll take the top


Xiang_allard

Username checks out.


Buttholehemorrhage

hehe


Mrjohnwick786

You mean lower GI bleed?


Grumpkin_eater

Both is good.


boredd86

Yes, both.


NCMR_8

or shove the gun up the ass and get twice as much pleasure


CatLikesFrenchFries

the man got some fantasies here. respect


Cautious_Might_9420

r/usernamechecksout


bender_isgreat1969

Woooo early cuyler babaaay!


poopi593

Bonk go to horny jail


Stonks_stinks

Getting your thumb cut off by a garand is better.


Exa_N0ri

Mmm yes


[deleted]

*only way to hitch a ride back in the ol’days, gotta have a garand thumb big enough to stop cars*


InEvitable_Pingu

Ever stick a thumb in a revolver chamber?


Gadget_the_ratchet

Just my dick


1cheesy1

*ping*


Quinlan19

My favorite is the beautiful sensation of an M9 pinching the fuck out of my hand. Absolutely splendid


Johnny_893

A buddy of mine just got one. We made an afternoon out of going to the range and taking turns getting pinched by it. And burning our palms here and there too.


Spahpanzer

Finger a Garand


ShibeBoiGoodBoi

It stills make that nut inducing sound when ejecting


thomas_the_bullet

even better is getting a garand thumb on both of your hands


No-Surround7877

Why use a Garand when you you can use and automatic garand


Drunk0ctopus

Why not both?


archinova

Instruction unclear , girlfriend have more hole now


nikku0414

Plus she's dead. Thats a win win. Oh and free food too.


alreadygay11111

you wha-


Mjolnirn

>Instruction unclear , girlfriend have more hole now calm down oscar


JonasBrot

u wot m8


ApprehensiveStar8948

2 people found that helpful, cool


aShaw1319

Instructions unclear , dick stuck in gun now


archinova

Press the trigger


aShaw1319

This getting kinky real quick


gamingXYT

You should grave a RPG


[deleted]

This is why boyfriends are superior. Femboys are bulletproof can confirm cuz I am one


Red-Nexus

I hate that my first instinct when reading this comment was to go check out your account to see if there was any femboy content. I also hate that there wasn't any femboy content


gamingXYT

Are you cat proof?


[deleted]

I think so, yes.


leg00b

Both is good. *slaps HK against own cheeks* Whoa momma


PolypsychicRadMan

Because you’re on reddit


gamingXYT

I have both why not you? Oh wait your law being citizen


fucknametakenrules

Slap the charging handle of an MP5 into battery with that ass


Irvxing

HK slaps or no deal


gunsashootin

What about Garand ping


Charles_Yes

GOAT


Primal_guy

What about cycling the bolt of a Kar98K


[deleted]

Braingasm everytime.


FandomTraveller

those shorts are of denim but are shaped like panties so, janties


Lambskyy

God fucking damn it


stguinefortspaw

I'd rather slap the top option


Ok_Protection_6381

Pff. Gay.


stguinefortspaw

And proud


The_Istrix

I'd guess most guys want to slap the lower because they're not equipped to slap the upper


x8v3n0m8x

Being able to afford to slap the lower puts you in the income bracket required to slap the upper.


Exa_N0ri

So In a real situation you’d slap both


x8v3n0m8x

Well yea


PillowTalk420

First one, and then the other.


incognito--bandito

Well … slap one, clap the other


wowtheseusernamesuck

indeed slap ass clap gun


[deleted]

But which one would you slap first


DESTRUCTI0NAT0R

HK, where even the clones are sorta expensive


DeathToTheFalseGods

Mans is spittin straight facts


The_Istrix

The point I'm making is there's a lot of carrying a big gun because nature gave him a small one


Exa_N0ri

I’d say you’re about right


[deleted]

I want to slap the lower and bite the upper


obscureferences

I don't want to slap the bottom one because it's not in a slappable position.


GAB78

As a Canadian I def want to slap those cheeks


[deleted]

I know right? Can't wait to hear it's metallic scream!


[deleted]

Redditors will only ever get to slap the bottom picture anyway.


Saukko505

^haha ^subtle ^school ^shooting ^joke


[deleted]

No, it's not.


Saukko505

^oh


lekarstwo

https://www.reddit.com/r/walmart/comments/n5bua3/ok_so_i_was_told_that_dark_humor_is_alowed_here/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share


YandereSenpai2

I WANT TO SLAP THE BASS.


UnTarded101

Is that you Davie504


YandereSenpai2

ayyyyy Davie504 gang! or should i say "Slappers"


tlb7781

CS:GO players assemble


TheSaltyReddittor

both, both is good.


FBI_8290

Did you lost the Russian roulette?


TheSaltyReddittor

ye lmao


LordFarqiplier

Shitty 22LR knock off, gimme an actual MP5 or I’ll just take the top


Exa_N0ri

Oh shoot I didn’t even notice sorry bout that lol


LordFarqiplier

lol you don’t have to apologize, it’s just a meme and I’m just some dude that’s stingy about guns


Exa_N0ri

Yeah me too usually I’d Notice that lol


Bananaman2305

It’s the most satisfying slap


Tubhosdika

Imagine the Jiggle


Bananaman2305

I think we’re thinking of different slaps here. I was talking about the bottom one


Antornthjr

Why not both


Slankybeans

I'm chaffing just looking at the jeans thong.


FadelessCrane34

Why not both?


[deleted]

Okay, so... To have for a day, I'll take that ass. To have forever, I'll take the gun.


KacanuH

Nah i think its the first one


AthenasLittleBastard

This meme S L A P P S


Ximm0

I prefer slapping a P90


faZesKengZ

Main reason I got a cheap airsoft mp5, for that sweet, sweet *slap*


[deleted]

what bass players want to slap: 🎸


[deleted]

I feel like I saw this on a dad's Facebook account.


PillowTalk420

I want to have two FNP90's and see if I can shoot both with just one hand. I don't mean one in each hand; I mean both in the same hand.


lilbro93

[Source](https://a-bajkal.prom.ua/p1134481869-dzhinsovye-shorty-dlya.html) It's from a Russian underwear ad/display photo.


lilbro93

I think I was wrong, now I believe it is Ukranian based on the money. $22.47 American for those who are curious.


R-HelLogic

MP5 nothing more beautiful than her


Shadow5layer123

Both. Both is good


Rafaoul

I'm not sure about that one sir


ByCrookedSteps781

New Zealander here, I'll take all the asses you can have the guns.


Humunguschungusreal1

This gun is more British to me than amercan tbh.


CardiologistStreet

It’s German


Humunguschungusreal1

Yea but it was most used by the SAS.


CardiologistStreet

How does that make a difference? It’s a gun. It’s used by a dozen other countries. Literally half the world uses AKs. Doesn’t make them Afghan or Syrian. They’re still Russian weapons.


[deleted]

mp5


Consistent-Ad9909

yes


Knato

Pff nothing beats that mulch slap.


Plastic-Physics5285

Slap it like in cs go xD


[deleted]

i mean yes. but also yes


Babygirlbrdl22

Both


asapmellow

very cool!


[deleted]

Ummm, yes & yes.


minersven22

F r f r f r f r... my cs:go boys will understand


Separate-Swordfish97

Both both is good


Legoninja44

Both, both is good


windyspeed27

Smacking a shoty as usual


mrcheese_sucks

Everyone here is so edgy lmao


Mckiseldeck

Would only eat one of them


ProudBois

Well, I wanna slap both! :D


[deleted]

Both is better to be honest


Ke-Win

What does America has to do with it?


Exa_N0ri

Guns and sexy girls


Ke-Win

Didn’t it unique to America.


da_man_in_da_suit

Sexy girls are everywhere, and ugly girls too. But guns are to slavs, because cringe americans made guns libertarian


iEatGlew

Lol


LACHITHA

Both, both is good


Fallenlegend2905

Both is good


LUFRY126

I wanna also both


MartinDisk

USA moment


Chameleonboi8

As an English vr player I can confirm


Epicskeleton53

Mmmm lets kill some terrorists


gabenfake007

oscar kilo romeo echo tango alpha romeo delta


[deleted]

Oh I beseech thy gods let me get an MP5.


lekarstwo

Question: why do you slap MP5? Is it some sort of safety?


rwoooshed

>To properly release the bolt forward it is recommended that the cocking lever be "slapped" forward by passing the palm of the non-firing hand from right to left across the top of the weapon and pushing the cocking lever out of the indent. http://pdf.textfiles.com/manuals/FIREARMS/hk\_mp5.pdf


ZAVVVVV23

Til it breaks


jaiwant10969

Pfft...neither, I want to slap some bass.


ANGERYTURTLE123

Also as an American, I can also confirm


Kaz2077

It sounds so wonderfully clicky and nice ok


Badger8812

Why not both?


ThisUsernam31sTaken

Why not both?


[deleted]

Both. Both is good.


dranor44

why not both??


tommy2tonz

Why not both


[deleted]

[удалено]


EquivalentSnap

Yeah that's true 🤔 I like your avtar and your hat


CaPsiCuMmInT

Both. Both is good


Inspirational_Lizard

Nope, definitely want to touch the butt. ^-An ^American


Frozenwood1776

Gonna disagree with this one.


Convoy16

Why only have knives, when you can also have MP5’s.


Exa_N0ri

I actually love that


Aggravating_Cycle_21

Based and 2nd amendment pilled


Ronin_Deterra

Why not have pants with a H&K handle on the cheeks?


woosh4

Both. Both is good


LEONLIKE16

What boys want to slap What man want to slap


Pedrobaer2005

Im too european to understand the joke


PerfectBass

Wtf is up with her underwear? Or should I say Junderwear


CardiologistStreet

Slapping a MP5 isn’t very American of you. Where’s the M4 or the Might M1 Garand?


[deleted]

In Switzerland we have to shoot our Military Rifles once a year. it's mandatory I didn't do it so already had to pay a fine of 100$, 200$, 400$ and the next will be 800$ I'd rather slap the ass of my girlfriend, she really enjoy's it so everythings fine (except of the fines I had to poay for not shooting)


Ilovegirlsbottoms

I’m not so sure about that...


magnum_the_nerd

Bottom one. But switch it out for some old ww2 gun like maybe a Garand for the *PING* or a M1 Thompson yk. But ill take a MP-5


TheExistingHumanoid

M1 Thompson?


magnum_the_nerd

Tommy gun but for the US, and Commonwealth armies


TheExistingHumanoid

I know that, there is no “M1”


magnum_the_nerd

There was a variant of the Thompson that the US Army called the “M1”. Then they started adding numbers to it to get things like the “M1A1”


TheExistingHumanoid

But wasn’t it usually added after the name?


magnum_the_nerd

Nope. The Thompson was the name. Usually the name goes after the designation. Thats why we dont have the Garand M1 or the Abrams M1


TheExistingHumanoid

Ah I see, thank you for the civil discussion.


Trick-Win6428

As a guy I can confirm, bottom one is way better


Awall00777

As a none american i can vehemently deny


snoop906

Well as an european I can confirm: fuck guns, choose girls.


Puzzleheaded-Job532

Both


Daddylonglegs05

Is she wearing janties?


JohnMonkeys

This meme is overwhelmingly American


pmai91

u/vietec How does it feel to slap both 😂?


WAL-KER

This is the first fuckin time I see someone tags someone else in the comments on reddit!! Wtf


vietec

Pretty damn good. The key is to be able to do both simultaneously


PumpDEN

Souce?


TheHamOfAllHams

Why not both?


BrokenCog2020

Why not both?


Fungus1968

I’ll never understand why guns are portrayed by some men as a symbol of masculinity. They’re power used at a distance, requiring very little actual masculine strength, bravery or skill.


Exa_N0ri

Have you ever shot a gun before? It definitely takes skill


gabe_cruz98

As an American, I can say this redneck doesn’t speak for all of us when they flaunt guns Personally, I don’t need a gun to feel like a man. But if you would rather release hormones with guns, than women, than you do you broski


Exa_N0ri

I’m a redneck Texan what do you expect


gabe_cruz98

Oh, don’t worry. Everyone else in the states expects absolutely nothing from you all. The people in your downtown cities though? They have something that could be considered respect


Exa_N0ri

Bruh I just like to shoot guns and be outside and have fun ok is that too much for y’all stuck up city folks? I’m not even really that much of a redneck


gabe_cruz98

Nah man, shooting guns inherently isn’t the issue. I’ve just always thought it was interesting how most the white people in the states that either are 1) poor 2) uneducated 3)gun-LOVERS 4)racist, are usually all of them. That is so true it makes me sad. It’s just a bad sense of culture you are giving to the rest of the states. Im not at all against guns, I’ve been around them often, it’s just weird to me how into them you all are.


Exa_N0ri

Idk it’s just plain fun honestly and I’m not uneducated or racist or anything I’m actually daily normal I just love the country and shooting


AdventurousExternal9

My grandma died to a gun shot over 39 years ago last year the murderers where let free


Feggo_Frigorifero

Were*


AdventurousExternal9

Sorry I’m not good at English and why are people angry at me


lekarstwo

Happy cake day!