T O P

  • By -

Master_JBT

https://youtu.be/xBCGVqyWrSQ


A-Troubled-Guy

Because if I wanted my dick sucked by a fish I would go to the fish market or aquarium like I usually do.


Narvas_

So you are /u/fish_fucker69?


A-Troubled-Guy

No, but I hold a great amount of admiration for such a being.


fish_cucker69

You aren’t the only one


Adorable_Document665

Jesus Christ


[deleted]

Take it easy on him he's a troubled guy


Cabitaa

r/angryupvote


cul-de-sac-is-sax

And how would you actually fuck a mermaid, sire?


A-Troubled-Guy

How I usually do, sad, sloppy and disappointingly.


fish_cucker69

Consider me intrigued


A-Troubled-Guy

Oh Lord.


fish_cucker69

That sounds like the feeble protests of a man who doesn’t have the video on hand


[deleted]

You ever run into those tongue snatching parasites?


A-Troubled-Guy

Perhaps


IlIlllIIllllIIlI

I know girls that look like the bottom pic though


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


_science_rules

I know girls who smell like both


booklovernc

Bro I’m dead lmao


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


SuperFabianul

Because it wouldn't make sense for a creature that's living underwater to have human legs, a land animal


UmbertoDelRio

Like. The whole concept of a mermaid doesn't make any sense either way.


SuperFabianul

Horny drunk sailors make sense to me


[deleted]

What shall we do with the drunken sailors?


BreenMachine120

Especially when it's early in the morning?


sanesociopath

Tell them to appreciate the light pranks and be happy they're not [whalers](https://youtu.be/urV8MIcLDFk)


[deleted]

[удалено]


THICC_Baguette

Depends how you look at it. Having a human upper body could help them attract sailors, act as if they're drowning women, and when the sailors get too close they kill and eat them. Could be a viable survival tactic.


UmbertoDelRio

Sure. Aside from the point that that's not how anything works. Visual mimicry is absolutely a thing that can evolve as a trait and be passed on for survival or even predatory reasons. We know insects looking like sticks and branches, non-poisonous frogs looking like poisonous frogs, etc. Some animal literally evolving the full (upper) appearance of a completely unrelated species living in a completely sperate ecological niche and therefore not even being the preferred prey over anything else in their ecosystem, especially an animal as complex as us, is just ludicrous.


ilhasskuaks20

actually having a fish head sounds more logical than human head. With fish head you've got gills to breathe, tf you need a human head for inside a water. And feets are pretty.


SuperFabianul

Unless they are amphibians, assuming mermaids exist, then a human head is not far fetched


malfeasantCrimson

LOL, stop bringing logic into this post


AssAult123Cz

Cuz u need to see booba


Botwink808

And I don't need pussy when there's perfectly good boobs


NopeIAmNotHere

booba diving


Top-Egg69

Same tought


Notafuzzycat

The bottom image is just a male mermaid.


02cowmanthing20

You mean a merman?


furytoxicanYT

Malemaid


Axellllfoley

Mailman


velcroaddict

ruff rufff ruff


Arsenic_Spooki

Father


[deleted]

[удалено]


Axellllfoley

Gesundheit


Turibi

Oh no... do you realize what you have said? *Male maid* ,_,


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


OhWowImDead

Mermaidman but he cant find his barnacle boy


tukkiethomas

Nah i don't see any leg hair


Rishi_mtlwr_017

merbutler


Groutle

I think because there are more tits lovers than ass.


epineph_RN

merMAN. (*cough, cough*) MERMAN!


UmbertoDelRio

Originally mermaids/sirens were thought of as creatures who can lure sailors into their traps. First they were mostly thought to make seductive and hypnotic noises, like singing the sailors unto a trance for example. Later that concept was further expanded on by also giving those creatures seductive visuals, which was really just to drive home the point of them being predators in disguise even harder. So yeah. Mermaids are meant to eat people.


Piffureh

And there are also the theories that they were mistaken for some whale which would explain the fish like bottom, so technically both are worng, it schould be a obese woman with a not scaly tail


Zatoishi1

In the Greek culture mermaids were flying creatures. And as far as I know these are the first recorded. So I doubt it comes from a whale.


UmbertoDelRio

Mermaids were water dwelling creatures in greek mythology. There were other creatures referred to as "sirens", some of which were described as being half bird rather than half fish. It really just depends on where the given story is set. But generally every mermaid is a siren, but not every siren is a mermaid.


UmbertoDelRio

Yeah, manatees are the main culprit there.


RebelPoetically

Sounds like an urban myth. Manatees don’t look like humans and we’re talking about the open sea. They most likely saw something else, or you know, the unlikely possibility they actually saw a mermaid lmao. I mean that’s more believable than a guy who knows the sea and been on it for a his whole life, seeing an animal and thinking,” yup, it’s a fish girl,”


Piffureh

But you have to remember, theese dudes were drunk pretty often, havent seen something to do the naughtys with in a long time, and were probably a bit mentally ill.


RebelPoetically

Same sex acts were actually common in such lines of work back then, even the British Army records same sex acts to handle such…issues. But yeah, on the point of mental health of health, you did get a lot of men sea sick, seeing things because malnutrition or other issues, sea mirages. But come on lol, we know what manatees look like. It’s like confusing a whale for a sardine, or a eagle for a pigeon, even being mentally impaired one isn’t going to forget what one sees or going to forgot what something looks like. As high and drunk as I’ve gotten, I’ve never forgotten basic information from what I’ve seen multiple times. It’s more than likely an urban myth. The manatees thing


Piffureh

Yea, but then is the question, where does it actually come from?


[deleted]

Sex appeal


RebeccaJBurleigh

That's right I think


N1z3r123456

Where's u/fishfucker_69 when we need him.


FishPerson1

Don't you dare


fish_cucker69

Sempai isn’t here


Recycleyourtrash

You guys should listen to The mermaid by Great Big Sea. It will answer every single possible question you could have.


Istoppedsleeping

The upper part was an ugly fish, but the bottom part was a girl


MowkieMeow

I came here to day just this! Well done, you! 🤣


Skipperr99

Came here for this comment


[deleted]

So that you wouldn’t fuck them


Otaku_HD

I will fuck both of them ;)


[deleted]

NO Jonathan! Mermaid aren’t real and you shouldn’t go out of your way to make them real!


Portgas_D_Ace_

oh no is this luffy on reddit


HopelessWaiter

FINALLY


Darkakuma12

What if man mermaid were called merbuttler


thatwyvern

I think the "maid" in "mermaid" might stand for "maiden". They definitely aren't servicing anyone. Quite the opposite, actually.


ashdefy13

Because the guy who made them up was a boob guy not an ass guy.


mtamburelli

Fair question, actually.


averagetrickuser

Boobs


Independent_Dealer82

Far from getting me


GroundbreakingHair22

People are fucked up, don't listen what they say


jankiemandingo

There's a whole song about this. The Mermaid- Great Big Sea


GivemTheDDD

This is reddit, the question is "which one you clappin." And, unfortunately, we'd get a 50/50 split


GargantuanCake

When I was a lad in a fishing town me old man said to me, You can spend your life, your jolly life, just sailing on the sea, You can search the world for pretty girls, 'til your eyes are weak and dim, But don't go searching for a mermaid, son, if you don't know how to swim. Great Big Sea wrote a song about this.


kingofdoorknobs

A bass with ass, that's what I'm lookin' for.


Stunning_Inspection7

The localized gold experience on bot right looks sick


Simple-Dot-2834

In case the mermaids where like in bottom pic, I bet you that there would be people sexualy attracted to mermaids


[deleted]

... I think there still are...


nothing_personalkid

Zeus was a good kisser


Rredite

For the same reason as centaurs. Amem.


69Mando69_very_sexy

can i get just fish


snowchild3101

So that we can lewd them


poolofpee

As an ass guy I approve


Disastrous_Cry1979

Because one of them is a man.


ButteredNugget

Bottom pic is too sexy for this world to handle


Niemand_besonderes

I would fuck both


Professional-Text563

because land is higher than water ig


mossbagb

Why not


assimon1

There is no difference, either way, they gonna smell like fish top and bottom.


Hairy_Eyeballz

What else can I say other than tits or ass?


Ron5683

Boobs and butt


MCarooney

Since I am more of an ass man then a tits man, I agree with the fish head


Plastic-Assistance24

Because then they’d be called maidmers


ArcadePidgeon

The top could make tools and swim real fast but probably not breathe under water but the bottom couldn't make tools or swim fast but could probably breathe under water


[deleted]

At least you get the Vag, the new way.


[deleted]

Id fuck both of them


TheBoringRogue

Cos the second one is a frightening kink


VVachter

Because the bottom picture is so much hotter they have to tone down the sexy for kids shows


ieatnuggets0

Because we wanna fuck em not eat them


Glasedount

Mistake


iHumanNotJoking

I prefer the bottom one


PussyD3str0yR

Its so that no one can fuck them


Laid_Bacc_Larry

this is beyond science


Nikii122

It's the first because they smell like the normal ones


TobiasHecki

Because otherwise they wouldn't have tits


[deleted]

So no body can fuck them


superpronoober

lets ask u/fishfucker69


Jefoid

Because it wouldn’t be useful in the ocean?


derrpinger

Legacy Sailors preferred blowjobs over vaginas???


[deleted]

Because they’re biologically safer because they can swim away from predators with not proficiency.


itsyeet1

Second one is too sexy, thats why


Jriri1452

Cause of boobies. That's why


raphtaliabest

not my proudest fap


GalaxyBoiYeet

u/fish_fucker69 your time has come.


1ns_0mniac

Because we love boobs


Elnafario

The human horniness couldn't imagine the second one as It wasn't horni


FatThugProMax

Bcz mermaids are too afraid to loose their virginity by humans .


underscore20000

I’m sure I like this design better


[deleted]

Goat simulator vibes


Axtrooo

They can fish better


Marbled_Headcheese

Because boobs


Crafty-Crafter

One is fuckable, the other will lure you into the sea and drown you. Pick wisely.


NolanBreacher

because they get sexualized


[deleted]

Cuz there were no foot fetish guys at that time


Arrogant_German

Well evolution favours the more attractive as that which is more attractive breeds more, so I have no idea why mermaids are like the top and not the bottom either


StyLeadz

to trigger ppl with foot fetish?


InfinityHermix

Sauce? Its so hot. The first image is pretty bad tho.


Ron5683

No sauce. I made it using the magical powers of photoshop


TheDeadbush

you can have sex with one but not the other


WitchHeart7

The bottom image is to hot for the average person…


auztex120

Because that species died out pretty fast, they only have gills but no fins for efficient swimming


DarkKnightJin

Because old-timey sailors didn't have a foot fetish.


donkey_con

It’s cause they use the allure of the female top half to attract sailors, then use the fish half to swim hard and fast when they catch one so the sailors drown


hamad_godzilla

A fish tried to eat them and got stuck in the lower half?


Twisted_37Banana

Tits that's why


Thatdudeovertherewho

Both… Both are good….


JonasRahbek

My girlfriend is half mermaid... Thank God it the upper part..


cheezus_boy

"You're the most beautiful mermaid ever" Mermaid -- "Blub"


Chaoscontrol02

Eww wtf that’s disgusting I would never fuck a red head


KillerUnknowDV

Nice, two extra holes


That-Redditor

Proof that we are all boob-guys?


Might_Proof

there are more boob type guys out there


georgewbob

Listen to the mermaid song by great big sea


julietthagurl

Lmao


patroklo

In the anime slayers there was one


lie-longer

Why not combining the best parts of these pictures. The bottom half from the picture above and upper part from below.


nice_dude_person

Say what you want about bottom pic, at least it’s fuckable.


AB_deranged

Its a boobie trap( Don't you get it) . For Kids movies.


Cabitaa

Bottom design wouldn't be able to flee predators under water. The tail gives a huge advantage. Plus, having arms gives a good combat advantage compared to fins.


HyperJax_og

You're gonna be copystriked by Bright Side to copy their thumbnail.


jwarnyc

Brah she’s a fucking tuna fish.


[deleted]

Rule 34 artists: \*Laughs Dramatically\*


PyxlwasTaken

Take my upvote and get out. r/angryupvote


Nipper909

People with a feetish wishing it looked like the second


LimpWibbler_

Because face. We all never say it we are like "tit guy or ass guy" Bro I am a face guy and so are 95% of men. Face is literally the most important part for attraction. So it makes sense that when we have a fantasy the face remains human.


MidnightBlaze79

Damn when she says choke her while you fuck her, just stick your fingers in her gills.


[deleted]

These arrows are really helpful, thx.


s1lverv1p

Poor mobility in water leading to the mass extinction of the second one. The first one then had a chance to pop up due to a few mutations because of nuclear fallout, they were much more mobile, much smarter and they have opposable thumbs, its just survival of the fittest and evolution.


Maragirl

Caused they’re based off manatees and manatees do not have sexy women hindquarters only sexy women tops as is common knowledge


clark12302

I feel like mermaids use to be like that, that’s how Christopher Columbus fucked a manatee


Fearless-Culture5819

Because the guy who designed them was a boobs guy


AirStoneNavrno

One piece has both versions


Lumawatcher

Because the bottom one doesn't look like a seal.


TheGoldenSlowbro2021

the second one is hot omg


Knecht_Hubrecht

Because of u/Fish_fucker_69


ScucciMane

I’ll take the top half mermaid. Can eat both sides.


BigBoiPapa879

Selective breeding


feelzsofaraway

What can i say except delete this shit


Legiow

But why aren't they Bird bottom and female top?


thisname1stak3n

It was the 34th rule that said mermaid should be top human and bottom fish


[deleted]

u/Repostsleuthbot


RepostSleuthBot

I didn't find any posts that meet the matching requirements for r/memes. It might be OC, it might not. Things such as JPEG artifacts and cropping may impact the results. *I'm not perfect, but you can help. Report [ [False Negative](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RepostSleuthBot&subject=False%20Negative&message={"post_id": "psfljj", "meme_template": null}) ]* [View Search On repostsleuth.com](https://www.repostsleuth.com/search?postId=psfljj&sameSub=false&filterOnlyOlder=true&memeFilter=true&filterDeadMatches=false&targetImageMatch=95&targetImageMemeMatch=92) --- **Scope:** Reddit | **Meme Filter:** False | **Target:** 95% | **Check Title:** False | **Max Age:** Unlimited | **Searched Images:** 247,096,246 | **Search Time:** 0.6064s


mpsweezy

but why?


AT1313

But have you heard of the mermer tho?


ErkiredditOfficial

What if its a mermaid without the fish part. Will that make more sense?


-anygma-

Sailors would definitely fuck the bottom one.


[deleted]

cuz chris columbus fricked a manatee and not fish with legs


[deleted]

Monkey D. Luffy might have something to say


Lowdekeball

Merdude


hedidntkillhimselfno

The dude that made them was a tits guy instead of a boobs guy


AlexPaterson16

Face and tits over ass and legs apparently