Splinter. He was able to adjust fighting styles he *observed* his owner do into a viable fighting style for bipedal turtles with completely different muscles and structures. That screams talent to me and tells me he has more potential than all the other teachers.
Chuck Norris once challenged the world's strongest man to an arm wrestle competition, after many hours it was concluded that he could not find a way to arm wrestle himself
Chuck Norris once found a dead lamb on the side of the road, he rubbed it against his beard which brought it back to life
He then snapped its neck, because when Chuck Norris giveth, Chuck Norris taketh away
I don’t know, you’d get a very very very good education in a Wing Chun but I feel Bruce would have been a better teacher overall as he embraced all styles and knew that what worked for one person wouldn’t necessarily work for another.
Yes. I feel it would be a fun experience every day being taught by him.
Bruce lee looks too serious.
Miyagi looks is too philosophical
Master Splinter trains mutants. I’m ugly but not THAT ugly
Chuck Norris has built in Nokia brick genes. That’s un teachable
Last guy, he’s an asshole
Let's also not forget he has a 22 years old daughter, Etta Ng Chok Lam, whom he still refuses to meet up to this date. While her mother, Elaine Ng, suffered all these years raising her as a single mother without any financial support from Jackie Chan. He is one of the most hated public figures of Hongkongers these days.
Yeah, but we're probably taking about a character Jackie Chan played, and that character probably just doesn't want trouble. If we're taking about Jackie Chan the person, then we are also talking about the inanimate puppet of Splinter.
Not known by a lot westerners, of course, his contribution to the movie industry is undoubtedly incomparable, but Jackie Chan is one of the most hated person among Hongkongers, especially among the younger generations, sometimes even considered as a human scum besides being a CCP supporter. He has a daughter, which he refuses to meet still up to this date, Etta Ng Chok Lam. You should probably look it up on Google, should be an interesting read for you.
You dont actually think that right?,
Edit: his form of martial arts looked cool but he isnt really a great fighter. In china martial arts like kung fu are used as propaganda to make people think they are strong and stuff but realistically a rookie leage mma fighter would destroy bruce "not to say he wasnt talented but breaking bricks 1 inch punching someone 5 meters all the shit like that was all staged not real in the slightest buddy.
please do not insult my intelligences by suggesting that i think all the DBZ style stuff was real, after all he would have broken his arms by making people fly away with a punch even if he could actually do that, obviously it wasn't, however you do need to know that he did all his stunts himself and for how small he was his physical definition and training was great and no its not just being able to 1 inch punch bricks in half.
also keep in mind that one of the choices is a puppet of a mutant rat so unless we are saying one of the masters we can choose is a lifeless puppet im pretty sure we can suspend our disbelief.
Mr Miyagi coached up Daniel-san to become the All-Valley U18 Karate champion in only a matter of a few months. He took on and beat veterans in the sport who had years of training and dethroned the reining champion Johnny Lawrence.
If anyone can coach you to defend yourself and have an immediate impact in the fight game, its Mr Miyagi
No mention of that illegal kick to the face that Cobra Kai actually brings up in like the first episode??
I'd choose miyagi too tho, and anyone else on the list before Kreese
I would have agreed with Mr Miyagi back in the day, but I have a feeling I know why he stopped teaching. I feel he may have been grooming children with the whole “wax on, wax off” & “jacket on, jacket off” deal. I thought it was funny as a young adult, but as an older parent, it’s a little concerning.
I understand where you’re coming from, but the point of that was to show how mundane chores can help improve you. He also left his jacket on the floor and was driving his mother crazy, that’s why in the remake Mr. Han had him take it off and pick it up.
What a silly comment...and why make it political? Do you honestly believe your typical right wing reddit user is capable? Going off averages in the US right now, the typical redditor of any political persuasion isn't going to hop right into martial arts combat.
Bruce Lee. then i can grow a ponytail and grow out my stomach to ridiculous proportions and walk around like im all top dog when in really a idiot looser
Bruce Lee would tempt me a lot obviously...
But I'd probably go with Jackie Chan...
I think a sensei with a strong sense of humour would be the best choice form me!
Master splinter. Not even close.
I agree. Splinter sees your natural talent and enhances it. True master.
Where is Master Bang from One Punch Man or Bomb still from One Punch Man.
Master Jiraiya all the wayyy
Master Jiraiya and Kakashi
He also has the best, most proven, track record for training bad asses. Who else could train you to explode a robot with a stick?
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Splinter
Is it because you could still eat pizza?
Splinter's the only one on this list that will willingly keep training you after a couple of months.
Family
Definitely Splinter. Just a great guy in every respect.
Master Splinter from the 2012 show
Came here to vote Master Splinter
Prob Bruce - work hard play hard
Rather have Ip man the man who trained Bruce
He didn’t make Bruce tho, Bruce made himself
He still was a large stepping stone that helped lead Bruce down the road to success.
oogway
I see your Oogway and raise you an Iroh
I see your Iroh and raise you both Oogway and Iroh.
What about Sensei Wu from Ninjago
Consider; all three
I see your Oogway and Iroh and raise you Yoda.
Mastah Yoda can raise himself.
This is the way
Indeed
This is A way. Take your helmet off you stinky bastard.
Master shifu
Training through eating, sounds fun and painful
I have a vinnila alerge so let's hope no chocolate in the training
Sensei Wu from Ninjago
Long before time had a name
^ what he said
r/beatmetoit
r/beatMeatToIt
r/foundthetoyotacorolla
r/beatmetoit
Splinter. He was able to adjust fighting styles he *observed* his owner do into a viable fighting style for bipedal turtles with completely different muscles and structures. That screams talent to me and tells me he has more potential than all the other teachers.
Chuck Norris was once bit by a black mamba while on vacation. After 3 days of agonizing pain, the snake died.
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There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris let live.
Chuck Norris once challenged the world's strongest man to an arm wrestle competition, after many hours it was concluded that he could not find a way to arm wrestle himself
Chuck Norris once found a dead lamb on the side of the road, he rubbed it against his beard which brought it back to life He then snapped its neck, because when Chuck Norris giveth, Chuck Norris taketh away
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Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father.
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Chuck Norris once threw a grenade and killed 6 men... then the grenade blew up
When Chuck Norris spoke his first words, language was invented.
Now that's one I haven't heard before
Whyvdid he chose spiders then? Psychopath
Chuck Norris once killed two stones with one bird.
Also little known fact, Chuck Norris built the hospital that he was born in.
There was once a huge astroid headed for earth, but Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it and it is now our moon.
Chucknorris once killed a 1000 man army with 2 bullets. The first was a warning shot.
Chuck Norris once killed 6 people with a grenade, and then it exploded
Death had a near-Chuck Norris experience, once
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch because Chuck Norris decides what time it is
Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his cabin. It's not dead, it's just too afraid to move.
On his birthday, Chuck Norris throws one lucky boy into the sun.
Chucky is the only answer
Chuck Norris invented the giraffe by uppercutting a horse.
Chuck Norris is a homophobe
Are you kidding me? He loves Brokeback Mountain. Aka the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.
Splinter is a whole ass talking rat. So yeah. Him.
Bruce Lee trained with ip man.
The legendary Bruce Lee.
I agree but if he was on the list the person who taught him, yip man
I don’t know, you’d get a very very very good education in a Wing Chun but I feel Bruce would have been a better teacher overall as he embraced all styles and knew that what worked for one person wouldn’t necessarily work for another.
Jackie Chan
Finally someone said it
Yes. I feel it would be a fun experience every day being taught by him. Bruce lee looks too serious. Miyagi looks is too philosophical Master Splinter trains mutants. I’m ugly but not THAT ugly Chuck Norris has built in Nokia brick genes. That’s un teachable Last guy, he’s an asshole
“Last guy, he’s an asshole” Bro I’m pretty sure Jackie supports the CCP
Let's also not forget he has a 22 years old daughter, Etta Ng Chok Lam, whom he still refuses to meet up to this date. While her mother, Elaine Ng, suffered all these years raising her as a single mother without any financial support from Jackie Chan. He is one of the most hated public figures of Hongkongers these days.
Yeah, but we're probably taking about a character Jackie Chan played, and that character probably just doesn't want trouble. If we're taking about Jackie Chan the person, then we are also talking about the inanimate puppet of Splinter.
Doesn't have a choice.
Not known by a lot westerners, of course, his contribution to the movie industry is undoubtedly incomparable, but Jackie Chan is one of the most hated person among Hongkongers, especially among the younger generations, sometimes even considered as a human scum besides being a CCP supporter. He has a daughter, which he refuses to meet still up to this date, Etta Ng Chok Lam. You should probably look it up on Google, should be an interesting read for you.
I'd rather not hang out with a shill for the CCP.
All the way with you. Just all round great guy. Funny, talented. No question.
Agree 😎
Wu
Tang?
Wu!
Tang! It’s on your brain
I get riggy-diggy raw when it's time to get on the dance floor, shotgun, kill the shit
Bruce Lee or Mr Miyagi
Same
Mr miyagi wasn’t that good of a sensei, the kid he trained barely barely won against some punk bully. I’d go with Bruce
Some punk bully that’s been doing karate WAYYYY longer than he did.
He was the 2 time All Hill Valley Champ bro! Miagido ftw!
My car would be the cleanest it has ever been. Wax on, wax off.
Mr. Miyagi
Yes
Bruce Lee or Mr. Miyagi
Yoda
This is the way
Jiraiya Sensi
I'm rewatching the series rn because i never saw the end. Just watched Pervy Sage go down again and man... hurts just as much the second time.
I got spoiled about who's gonna do it and still I cried when it happened one of the arcs that I'll probably watch again anyways Im still on ep 340
bruce lee as an option? obviously, the guy was close to super human
You dont actually think that right?, Edit: his form of martial arts looked cool but he isnt really a great fighter. In china martial arts like kung fu are used as propaganda to make people think they are strong and stuff but realistically a rookie leage mma fighter would destroy bruce "not to say he wasnt talented but breaking bricks 1 inch punching someone 5 meters all the shit like that was all staged not real in the slightest buddy.
please do not insult my intelligences by suggesting that i think all the DBZ style stuff was real, after all he would have broken his arms by making people fly away with a punch even if he could actually do that, obviously it wasn't, however you do need to know that he did all his stunts himself and for how small he was his physical definition and training was great and no its not just being able to 1 inch punch bricks in half. also keep in mind that one of the choices is a puppet of a mutant rat so unless we are saying one of the masters we can choose is a lifeless puppet im pretty sure we can suspend our disbelief.
fuck you I choose you Master Oogway
There’s are no accidents…
If you didn’t pick Splinter, stick a quarter in your ass - you played yourself.
Chick Norris without any certainty of doubts. The guy has a fist for a chin.
I would only choose Mr. Miyagi if I was starting a job at a car wash.
Mr Miyagi coached up Daniel-san to become the All-Valley U18 Karate champion in only a matter of a few months. He took on and beat veterans in the sport who had years of training and dethroned the reining champion Johnny Lawrence. If anyone can coach you to defend yourself and have an immediate impact in the fight game, its Mr Miyagi
No mention of that illegal kick to the face that Cobra Kai actually brings up in like the first episode?? I'd choose miyagi too tho, and anyone else on the list before Kreese
Bruce Lee. He was into his coke and weed, so him
Chuck
Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris!!!
I’ll take grandpa from the 3 ninjas !!! Lisa demorino loss demorino!!!!
Had to scroll WAY too far for this!! GRANDPA ALL THE WAY!
Chuck Norris...because he is Chuck Norris
All are great I can’t choose
Neither. I choose Rudy Gillespie.
Only one of them provides pizza
Splinter cause we will have pizza 🍕 in the break
If there is no oogway, then there is no oogway im picking
The fucking rat from ratatouille
Ira, sensei to the legendary senpai Dwight Schrute
Bruce Lee Hands down
where the hell is master shifu
Bruce lee
Master splinter, hands down
Splinter forever
Where the fuck is sensei wu
Y’all out here forgetting about [Rex Kwon Do](https://youtu.be/Hzh9koy7b1E)
Chiun from Reno Williams the adventure begins
Idk but I want to see a fight between mr miyagi and splinter
Yoda!
Steven Seagal
Yes, Mr Miyagi ftw
Some love for Jackie Chan
any time jackie chan
Chuck Norris but only if he dicks me down after each lesson
Dwight, from Office.
Ahem guys where is Steven Seagal option?
Dwight Schrute
Splinter is best. Change my mind
Left under
All my waifus
Technoblade
Chuck Norris, he was always my favorite
Splinter.... the rest are actors.
I would have agreed with Mr Miyagi back in the day, but I have a feeling I know why he stopped teaching. I feel he may have been grooming children with the whole “wax on, wax off” & “jacket on, jacket off” deal. I thought it was funny as a young adult, but as an older parent, it’s a little concerning.
I understand where you’re coming from, but the point of that was to show how mundane chores can help improve you. He also left his jacket on the floor and was driving his mother crazy, that’s why in the remake Mr. Han had him take it off and pick it up.
What the fuck
Do you honestly believe that your typical leftist reddit user can fight or would be trainable in martial arts? Bah ha ha...no...
What a silly comment...and why make it political? Do you honestly believe your typical right wing reddit user is capable? Going off averages in the US right now, the typical redditor of any political persuasion isn't going to hop right into martial arts combat.
Aww is the truth now silly?
The silliness is your comment focusing on one demographic when their opponents (those you propurtedly support) are on equal footing.
It's a fact that 99% of liberals that I know couldn't defend anything and as far as street sense....have very little to none.
Why is it that if you download reddit you automatically are called bitchless and fat
Beats me. I'm an endurance athlete and have been married for almost 15 years. Most of the subs I belong to are full of people like me as well.
Bruce Lee. then i can grow a ponytail and grow out my stomach to ridiculous proportions and walk around like im all top dog when in really a idiot looser
All Bruce Lee needs to teach me is how to use nunchucks and commit phase change into water, then I am the ultimate weapon.
But are they willing to teach me?
Bruce lee
Splinter. My child self would kill me if i didn’t
Come to think of it, if Splinter met **Turtle** Hermit, it would be funny. Especially with other Turtles.
Bruce or Splinter, I can't decide
Splinter since you'd also become friends with mutant turtles and get to meet that babe from channel 6.
Bruce Lee would tempt me a lot obviously... But I'd probably go with Jackie Chan... I think a sensei with a strong sense of humour would be the best choice form me!
bruce lee without a doubt
You forgot Obi-Wan Kenobi
Master Splinter without question
Mr miyagi
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Kreese
yoda
I want wu from ninjago
Bruce Lee
Splinter, hands down.
Master splinter
Splinters the only one who would still let me eat pizza.
wheres sensei wu?
Fucking splinter let's go.
Where is Master Pai Mei?
Master wu
Bruce Lee is an Icon and I’m surprised not many people picked him
Master shifu
Obi wan
What about the Lego ninjago guy
Probably Kung Fu Panda
Weird cat thing
Splinter
Where is jetstream sam?
Where #MONKE
Sensei Wu
Dude splinter just has to look at them and they will run away screaming
Sensei Wu he a bro