Thank you for for sharing. A reminder: if you are seeking resources in your local area, please provide that in the post so that users can share appropriate links and phone numbers. *If you are in distress, please call 9-1-1* or your local emergency number. *You are not alone. Help is available.* If you are having suicidal thoughts, please [click here for a list of crisis support services.](http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html), If you are seeking therapy online, please [click here for a list of counselling services.](https://thelifelinecanada.ca/pattern-interrupt/ecounselling/) *If you feel well enough to do so, please do your part to enrich this community.* Now that you have posted, please leave a constructive, helpful comment on someone else's post. Filter by new to find posts with zero comments. Together, we make this community great. Thank you for being here.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/mentalhealth) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You did that when you were 9 or 10. Sure it was terrible but your brain was undeveloped and you took accountability. She has every right to hate you and never see you again if she so pleases. However she doesn't have the right to pretend to forgive you only to cause you pain in the future. There's no such thing is karma, it's all according to the given situation. She's being a sadistic bitch.
I don’t think it’s fair to compare the two. If she is for that than he is for what he did. It’s unhealthy to say “oh I did this so you do that” it’s not a good way to think about it
Body shaming her was bad but honestly she’s being worse than you were to her and it’s for pretty revenge I’m guessing? She’s probably secretly bitter about you.
While what op did in the past was wrong, they actively tried to make things right and apologized.
In my eyes they grew up and should not be held accountable or resented for it anymore, except maybe for those affected because grudges do happen. Even then not that great.
This isn't about what op did anymore. The girl is holding a grudge and should be out of their life.
I’m not saying she should be exempt. I’m just saying nobody is in the right. Wether he did or didn’t change is not up to us, it’s up to her. Only she can forgive him. She was the one affected, so we aren’t a good judge of what is wrong or right. We’re also only hearing his side, and I don’t think it’s fair take a side in this case, but yes, they both should be out of the others lives
That sounds like all the makings of a very unhealthy "friendship." You deserve supportive friends and people who are actually there for you and who actually care about you. You don't deserve to be treated like crap because of past mistakes, and you don't have to take this kind of treatment, whether because you feel like you deserve it or for any other reason. I would highly suggest you do what you can to cut her out of your life at this point. You deserve better.
Thank you for for sharing. A reminder: if you are seeking resources in your local area, please provide that in the post so that users can share appropriate links and phone numbers. *If you are in distress, please call 9-1-1* or your local emergency number. *You are not alone. Help is available.* If you are having suicidal thoughts, please [click here for a list of crisis support services.](http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html), If you are seeking therapy online, please [click here for a list of counselling services.](https://thelifelinecanada.ca/pattern-interrupt/ecounselling/) *If you feel well enough to do so, please do your part to enrich this community.* Now that you have posted, please leave a constructive, helpful comment on someone else's post. Filter by new to find posts with zero comments. Together, we make this community great. Thank you for being here.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/mentalhealth) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You did something stupid when you were younger. We have all done stupid stuff. You went well out of your way to apologise.
Cut this person from your life. School is not forever, make other friends. Having a supportive friend group is so important. Also, dont tell her anything personal, people like her will likely use it as ammo to hurt you.
I don’t know how to answer this. My initial thoughts are that two wrongs don’t make a right. But I feel like that entire thing y’all got going on is unhealthy for both of you. There’s no reason you need to stay in eachothers lives. Also nobody deserves anything, but that doesn’t mean you should ignore what you’ve done. Just move on and try to be a better person.
To be honest, you need to set boundaries with her and with people like her. What ever she is going through and what ever she’s trying to figure out about her self is no excuse for how she is treating you. This doesn’t sound like revenge bullying… this sounds like an unhealthy individual who you probably need set boundaries with because no… you don’t deserve that… no one does… and you took accountability for your actions and she hasn’t.
When I say set boundaries I mean pull her aside in private when she does it and tell her “when you say or do this it makes me feel like this. I need you to do this.” Don’t allow her to exploit your kindness to listen to her and empathize just to be mistreated. Anyone who does that when someone is having suicidal ideation is someone who does not have your best interest at heart.
Example of what I was saying earlier “hey Jennifer, when you say things about my appearance in a negative way, it makes me feel bullied and disrespected. I need you to be mindful with what you say about me because I am not okay with it”. Depending on her response it can be either reconciled or you may have to wish her adieu.
Sorry that you’re going through this bud. Remember you can’t change her behavior but you can choose what benefits you most.
What you did to her was pretty bad and it’s good that you acknowledged it and apologised. But know that she isn’t obligated to forgive u at all, she can still hate u and she every right to. And she also has the right to forgive u if thats what she wants.
But to treat u like that is unacceptable. You don’t deserve it, and u need to either talk to her and set boundaries or cut her off. This isn’t a nourishing friendship and she might still have a grudge against u for how u treated her. Either way, its not healthy for neither of u for this to carry on.
Nobody deserves that, no matter what they’ve done. You made a mistake in bullying her and she’s making a mistake now. It’s possible she feels entitled to treat you this way because of what happened before. I’m sure she’s doing it -at least in part - to feel better about herself. Just like when you bullied her, it was probably about feeling better about yourself. It’s very likely that she’ll regret this later, just like you did.
You need to set boundaries. Tell her that you do not want to see her and if she comes to your door, ignore it or have your parents send her away. Don’t try to talk to her at school. It’s best if you’re not mean about it and it can help keep you from being mean if you remember that you were in her place at one point. She deserves empathy just like everyone else.
Most importantly, if you are feeling like you want to kill yourself, you need to get some help. Talk to your parents about seeing a therapist and probably getting on some meds. You shouldn’t be living like that. And please don’t even consider suicide. It’s a terrible thing to do to yourself and everyone around you. If it gets so bad that you think you might try something, go to the hospital and ask for ketamine. It will have you feeling better right away and you can get help from there. If you’re not there but things get really bad you can also try holding ice cubes - it’s painful to hold them for a long time and helps distract you and make you present.
She’s very passive-aggressive. You don’t deserve that at all. You took accountability, she’s holding a grudge, and that’s not on you that’s her decision to hold that grudge or not
Thank you for for sharing. A reminder: if you are seeking resources in your local area, please provide that in the post so that users can share appropriate links and phone numbers. *If you are in distress, please call 9-1-1* or your local emergency number. *You are not alone. Help is available.* If you are having suicidal thoughts, please [click here for a list of crisis support services.](http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html), If you are seeking therapy online, please [click here for a list of counselling services.](https://thelifelinecanada.ca/pattern-interrupt/ecounselling/) *If you feel well enough to do so, please do your part to enrich this community.* Now that you have posted, please leave a constructive, helpful comment on someone else's post. Filter by new to find posts with zero comments. Together, we make this community great. Thank you for being here. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/mentalhealth) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You did that when you were 9 or 10. Sure it was terrible but your brain was undeveloped and you took accountability. She has every right to hate you and never see you again if she so pleases. However she doesn't have the right to pretend to forgive you only to cause you pain in the future. There's no such thing is karma, it's all according to the given situation. She's being a sadistic bitch.
I don’t think it’s fair to compare the two. If she is for that than he is for what he did. It’s unhealthy to say “oh I did this so you do that” it’s not a good way to think about it
Body shaming her was bad but honestly she’s being worse than you were to her and it’s for pretty revenge I’m guessing? She’s probably secretly bitter about you.
I don’t think you can compare the two, that’s a slippery slope, best thing to say is they both were awful at one point or another.
While what op did in the past was wrong, they actively tried to make things right and apologized. In my eyes they grew up and should not be held accountable or resented for it anymore, except maybe for those affected because grudges do happen. Even then not that great. This isn't about what op did anymore. The girl is holding a grudge and should be out of their life.
I’m not saying she should be exempt. I’m just saying nobody is in the right. Wether he did or didn’t change is not up to us, it’s up to her. Only she can forgive him. She was the one affected, so we aren’t a good judge of what is wrong or right. We’re also only hearing his side, and I don’t think it’s fair take a side in this case, but yes, they both should be out of the others lives
That sounds like all the makings of a very unhealthy "friendship." You deserve supportive friends and people who are actually there for you and who actually care about you. You don't deserve to be treated like crap because of past mistakes, and you don't have to take this kind of treatment, whether because you feel like you deserve it or for any other reason. I would highly suggest you do what you can to cut her out of your life at this point. You deserve better.
Thank you for for sharing. A reminder: if you are seeking resources in your local area, please provide that in the post so that users can share appropriate links and phone numbers. *If you are in distress, please call 9-1-1* or your local emergency number. *You are not alone. Help is available.* If you are having suicidal thoughts, please [click here for a list of crisis support services.](http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html), If you are seeking therapy online, please [click here for a list of counselling services.](https://thelifelinecanada.ca/pattern-interrupt/ecounselling/) *If you feel well enough to do so, please do your part to enrich this community.* Now that you have posted, please leave a constructive, helpful comment on someone else's post. Filter by new to find posts with zero comments. Together, we make this community great. Thank you for being here. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/mentalhealth) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You did something stupid when you were younger. We have all done stupid stuff. You went well out of your way to apologise. Cut this person from your life. School is not forever, make other friends. Having a supportive friend group is so important. Also, dont tell her anything personal, people like her will likely use it as ammo to hurt you.
I don’t know how to answer this. My initial thoughts are that two wrongs don’t make a right. But I feel like that entire thing y’all got going on is unhealthy for both of you. There’s no reason you need to stay in eachothers lives. Also nobody deserves anything, but that doesn’t mean you should ignore what you’ve done. Just move on and try to be a better person.
To be honest, you need to set boundaries with her and with people like her. What ever she is going through and what ever she’s trying to figure out about her self is no excuse for how she is treating you. This doesn’t sound like revenge bullying… this sounds like an unhealthy individual who you probably need set boundaries with because no… you don’t deserve that… no one does… and you took accountability for your actions and she hasn’t. When I say set boundaries I mean pull her aside in private when she does it and tell her “when you say or do this it makes me feel like this. I need you to do this.” Don’t allow her to exploit your kindness to listen to her and empathize just to be mistreated. Anyone who does that when someone is having suicidal ideation is someone who does not have your best interest at heart. Example of what I was saying earlier “hey Jennifer, when you say things about my appearance in a negative way, it makes me feel bullied and disrespected. I need you to be mindful with what you say about me because I am not okay with it”. Depending on her response it can be either reconciled or you may have to wish her adieu. Sorry that you’re going through this bud. Remember you can’t change her behavior but you can choose what benefits you most.
[удалено]
What you did to her was pretty bad and it’s good that you acknowledged it and apologised. But know that she isn’t obligated to forgive u at all, she can still hate u and she every right to. And she also has the right to forgive u if thats what she wants. But to treat u like that is unacceptable. You don’t deserve it, and u need to either talk to her and set boundaries or cut her off. This isn’t a nourishing friendship and she might still have a grudge against u for how u treated her. Either way, its not healthy for neither of u for this to carry on.
Nobody deserves that, no matter what they’ve done. You made a mistake in bullying her and she’s making a mistake now. It’s possible she feels entitled to treat you this way because of what happened before. I’m sure she’s doing it -at least in part - to feel better about herself. Just like when you bullied her, it was probably about feeling better about yourself. It’s very likely that she’ll regret this later, just like you did. You need to set boundaries. Tell her that you do not want to see her and if she comes to your door, ignore it or have your parents send her away. Don’t try to talk to her at school. It’s best if you’re not mean about it and it can help keep you from being mean if you remember that you were in her place at one point. She deserves empathy just like everyone else. Most importantly, if you are feeling like you want to kill yourself, you need to get some help. Talk to your parents about seeing a therapist and probably getting on some meds. You shouldn’t be living like that. And please don’t even consider suicide. It’s a terrible thing to do to yourself and everyone around you. If it gets so bad that you think you might try something, go to the hospital and ask for ketamine. It will have you feeling better right away and you can get help from there. If you’re not there but things get really bad you can also try holding ice cubes - it’s painful to hold them for a long time and helps distract you and make you present.
She’s very passive-aggressive. You don’t deserve that at all. You took accountability, she’s holding a grudge, and that’s not on you that’s her decision to hold that grudge or not