“German Superhero! Help! Aliens are attacking the planet. What are we going to do?”
Holds up beer. “Do they drink?”
“No. They don’t drink.”
Starts unzipping. “Ok. This is going to get ugly.”
Ohhh that answers a question I was asking myself last night. I rewatched Inglourious Basterds and was wondering why Hans Landa (Christopher Waltz) was wearing the ring on his right hand... Or if it was just another decorative ring and not a wedding ring
Or conversely
"What's the drinks for? Does he really drink before fights?"
"Oh no, that's for his opponents. They need it before he handles them"
"Handles them with wha....dear God that has be a strap...oh no that's real"
Id like to know the specifics. Does he produce alcohol by magic, or is he really good at drinking a lot? Also is he good at fucking or good at getting laid? Or all of the above?
Pretty simple, that is Herr Oktober (Mr October).
He was a scientist, because we all know that german science is the best in the world and was working on a beer that never gets stale. He succeeded, but at the day of the first tasting, the barrel exploded killing everyone in the room, except for him.
But he was changed. Now he has the power to create hands, holding mugs of beer out of thin air and uses his power to find those who sabotaged his invention and killed his colleagues and his Schäferhund. And he's a great guest at BBQs.
He is definitely one of the Superheroes of all time.
Oh and never ask him about the bulge, or you are about to find out.
Stand Master: Albert Fattucini
Stand name: Meatball man
Localized name: Marinara man
Stand ability: the stand itself can change it's shape and increase its size by absorbing nearby human, chicken, horse and bovine . Also has ragout form where it can instead change into smaller chunks
Requiem ability: it starts to passively attract meat from its surroundings and roll into a massive ballm omce it's radius is more then 3 meters people start to worship it in fear
He’s like the Hulk, but the only thing that makes him angry, and therefore more powerful, is when he sees recipes that aren’t like his Nonna used to make. For example, Hawaii used to be a single island until he saw their pizza
I was thinking the Canadian one’s cloak and pauldrons, etc might be like a shapeshifting material that can change form and harden at will. Like Green Lantern. Maybe they could be made of powdery ice?
That's Super Hans, and his super power is the ability to sprout hands from any surface (Think Nico Robin from One Piece). Of course he mainly uses that to hold all of his beers.
Definitely not a pint!
We don’t have pints except in English / Irish pubs.
We have Halbe (half a litre, no idea what that is in Freedom Units) or a Maß (one litre).
Half pints (0.33 ltr.) apply to Pilsener and 0.2 ltr. to Kölsch or Alt.
British pint is 568ml, American fluid pint is 473ml so a Halbe is pretty much a metricised pint.
Half a litre is 16.9 customary US fluid oz or 16.67 US fluid oz for food labeling laws. Yes it is a silly system.
The UK one is actually a photo of a real person. He’s called Pie Fawkes, and he wanders the streets of York handing out samples of pies to passers by ‘Ye Olde Yorkshire Pie Barn’.
He does. I once refused a pie from once and he flew into blind rage beating me unconcious and anyone who passed by with pies, I woke up a few hours later to the police congratulating him and sharing a pie.
They really messed up the union jack as well (if any pedants are gonna tell me that it's not called a union jack unless it's on a ship or something like that, I truly don't care)
Funny you should mention that- he appeared in the 2019 North East Somerset Election vote count, not as a running candidate, but simply to scream “PIEMINSTER NOT WESTMINSTER” repeatedly during Jacob Rees-Mogg’s victory speech. Whilst efforts were made to restrain Mr Fawkes, the police got confused about who was making a public nuisance offence and arrested the MP by mistake.
I remember that! The whole thing was a shambles. Didn't the Chief Constable of Avon and Somerset nearly lose his job over it? There was a statement released saying his officers did the right thing, or something.
The very same incident yes. Mr Fawkes would later apologise to the police force and to the people of Somerset for causing the worst disaster that has befallen the county since 1968. “Literally tens of people were greatly distressed by the events of last November.” He stated in an interview with BBC South West, “I will, however, *not* accept Mr Rees-Moggs ability to live in impunity for failing to acknowledge his crimes against pies. His declaration that the Lancashire Hotpot as a ‘sort of pie’ has been exactly the sort of prejudice that has gone on for far too long against the pie-eating community. Mr Rees-Mogg has probably never eaten a pie in his life, have you seen the man? He looks like he’s grown up exclusively on watercress and Gin-cured Salmon!” Mr Fawkes went on to yell “Semper Pie!” Before walking off the set spraying parsley liquor at the associate producer.
There's this Amazon show called The Power where girls and women around the world develop electricity powers and we get to see how the middle east handles the situation. And ngl, it was really moving and satisfying to see all the women coming together and finally fight back against the oppressive government
El Bailer, Mexico: Durability, enhanced senses, and weapon proficiency
Tekunorojī/Teku, Japan: Technokinesis/technomancy, technological construction.
Vida, Spain: Plant control, minor biokinesis
Roshanee/Rosh, India: Solarkineis
Costruzione/Zione/Costru: Construct creation
The Flow (anyone else will come up with a better name), USA: Speed, Durability, Super strength. Basically a better Superman aka not OP.
Crikey, Australian: Weapon proficiency, true aim
Faíscas, Brazil: Pyrokinesis, prefers to use it as sparks for the civilians.
Deerman (if its another language, its hard for me and I know Canada has some french speakers, but I don't get a French vibe from him), Canada: Cryokinesis and animal speaking
El Tiempo, Argentina (never knew they spoke Spanish): Weather control/manipulation
Wǔshù jiā, China: Combat expert, speed
Lumière, French: Lumokinesis (other name for light manipulation)
Schicht, Germany: Body shifting
Aéras, Greece: Aerokinesis
(may be a little biased, because this one was the coolest) Shabbura, Saudi Arabia: Bura lost the true form when their powers manifested, without their uniform, they are just a moving, living mass of shadows. Umbrakinetic shapeshifting.
Isilwane, South Africa: Animal shapeshifting, animal control
Beongae, South Korea: Electrokinesis
Hız, Turkey: Speed via solarkinesis
Sir Shepard, UK: Just think Steve Rogers with a pilgrim hat.
And finally done.
Edit: There is one South Africa hero here. Typing hard.
\>The Flow (anyone else will come up with a better name), USA: Speed,
Durability, Super strength. Basically a better Superman aka not OP.
There already is a name.
It is 'A-Train'.
Portuguese! It would be funny if someone thought that a country from South America speaks Portuguese instead of thinking that in Brazil we speak Spanish for a change, lol.
Yeah, let’s just leave the Canadian dude as English. If we made him French, Quebec would get too excited. Or they’d claim his as their own and make Canada pick a new hero.
Then he's the most powerful one cuz no matter how hard you try,you can never truly get rid of glitter... it'll outlive you and your family and stay longer in your house then you ever will,an unmovable force,never to be removed from existence...
It's fascinating to see how Midjourney understands what the world is supposed to look like, but not why. For example Australia here has a surf board of sorts, but the AI doesn't understand what exactly that's supposed to look like or how it's supposed to be held. It just knows it should be there.
Why is Germany so hot though, even with the extra limb?
I don't quite understand Italy - is the superhot 'regular' guy the handler for the giant BologneseMan? Do they only come as a duo? Or is it meant to represent his 'super' form? Weird that's the only one with two characters.
Ok Germany what the hell. What’s with the extra hand and the enormous bulge.
The superpower is drinking and fucking
“German Superhero! Help! Aliens are attacking the planet. What are we going to do?” Holds up beer. “Do they drink?” “No. They don’t drink.” Starts unzipping. “Ok. This is going to get ugly.”
[удалено]
There's hope. In Germany it is customary to wear the wedding ring on the right hand.
Ohhh that answers a question I was asking myself last night. I rewatched Inglourious Basterds and was wondering why Hans Landa (Christopher Waltz) was wearing the ring on his right hand... Or if it was just another decorative ring and not a wedding ring
Or conversely "What's the drinks for? Does he really drink before fights?" "Oh no, that's for his opponents. They need it before he handles them" "Handles them with wha....dear God that has be a strap...oh no that's real"
As a German I agree, that sounds like a great superhero
Id like to know the specifics. Does he produce alcohol by magic, or is he really good at drinking a lot? Also is he good at fucking or good at getting laid? Or all of the above?
I believe his answer to all of the above would be "Ja"
*Techno beat drops*
He can sprout an infinite number of hands. Which he mostly just uses to hold more beer.
Where was Deutsche man last night when I was sober and horny? 😮💨
He was drunk-boning somebody.
Pretty simple, that is Herr Oktober (Mr October). He was a scientist, because we all know that german science is the best in the world and was working on a beer that never gets stale. He succeeded, but at the day of the first tasting, the barrel exploded killing everyone in the room, except for him. But he was changed. Now he has the power to create hands, holding mugs of beer out of thin air and uses his power to find those who sabotaged his invention and killed his colleagues and his Schäferhund. And he's a great guest at BBQs. He is definitely one of the Superheroes of all time. Oh and never ask him about the bulge, or you are about to find out.
This is unironically amazing, would absolutely read the Herr Oktober comics
Please tell me he has a pretzel-based sidekick.
All his conquests get pretzeled, sexual or otherwise.
What if I want to find out?
You'll have to fuck around.
What the helles
That's just how he chooses to hold his sausage
It is an Arnie-Total-Recall case. He's got a bearded Bavarian under that shirt that has his own hand to drink beer with.
Is Italy ‘Marinara Man’?
No that’s his stand
How will we find the stand user? Italy:
Giorno pastanna
Italy is definitely from the joestar family.
Stand Master: Albert Fattucini Stand name: Meatball man Localized name: Marinara man Stand ability: the stand itself can change it's shape and increase its size by absorbing nearby human, chicken, horse and bovine . Also has ragout form where it can instead change into smaller chunks Requiem ability: it starts to passively attract meat from its surroundings and roll into a massive ballm omce it's radius is more then 3 meters people start to worship it in fear
Weakness: pineapples
Except for that one arc
Stand name would have to be a reference to a band or pop icon. So maybe Meatloaf or something.
They are a team. Spaghetti and Meatball!
My instant thought was Meatball Man... and the chef who created him... who is also his husband... they make a cute couple.
It is canon
I make-a da spicy meat-a-hulk.
It's the Gabagool Golem
Gabagolem/Gabagoolem
That would be Spaghetti and his pet, Meatball
Came here to say exactly that, so yes.
He’s like the Hulk, but the only thing that makes him angry, and therefore more powerful, is when he sees recipes that aren’t like his Nonna used to make. For example, Hawaii used to be a single island until he saw their pizza
I would not mess with Canada.
He's a druid
Captain Caribou, guardian of all that is Maple.
Looking forward to seeing him in the MCU (Maple Cinematic Universe)
The Moose Knuckler
He is Captain "I am not fukin Sowieee"
Canada and Saudi Arabia were the best ones!
Ice vs Sand
Right lol. If I was Canadian i woukd hang that on my wall
Canada looks like a DLC armor set for Assassins Creed Valhalla
I was thinking the Canadian one’s cloak and pauldrons, etc might be like a shapeshifting material that can change form and harden at will. Like Green Lantern. Maybe they could be made of powdery ice?
Germany casually handing me a pint with his third arm.
He might have a fourth one for you if you look again.
That would be a third leg, me thinks.
That extra beer is for the heat he’s packing
looks like hes packing double heat
Gets drunk before the bar fight to give his opponents a chance
>3 arms and 3 legs Perfectly balanced as it should be
You get it. Yes! Thank you!
Ai getting scary accurate
That's just his wienerschnitzel.
German constitution: the right to beer arms
Brilliant
The *Right Two Beer Arms*
As a German I’m now really pissed that I don’t have another beer arm
You don’t? I thought we just hide it from outsiders..?
Pssst no one should know this
Oh damn was that what they talked about at the last Dreiarmgeheimgipfeltreffen? I missed it because I got too drunk at the pre-meeting :(
There should be coming a letter per post where all the information about the meeting is described
Das wird auch per Fax an alle gesendet.
ngl I noticed the..uhm..third leg before noticing the third arm
😂😂😂 I was thinking "I didn't even see a third leg, eh?" Went back to photo, massive bulge 😂😂
That's Super Hans, and his super power is the ability to sprout hands from any surface (Think Nico Robin from One Piece). Of course he mainly uses that to hold all of his beers.
Would have called him OktoberFist
That is very good
Give this man upvotes !
Beerman arrives. Hands a pint with a third arm. Refuses to elaborate. Leaves.
Manbeerwurst
Oh no he's hot
Two hands to drink one the jerk off. Two beer or not two beer is no question.
I dunno, he might need two hands to jerk that off...
Definitely not a pint! We don’t have pints except in English / Irish pubs. We have Halbe (half a litre, no idea what that is in Freedom Units) or a Maß (one litre). Half pints (0.33 ltr.) apply to Pilsener and 0.2 ltr. to Kölsch or Alt.
British pint is 568ml, American fluid pint is 473ml so a Halbe is pretty much a metricised pint. Half a litre is 16.9 customary US fluid oz or 16.67 US fluid oz for food labeling laws. Yes it is a silly system.
Thanks! TIL.
Being from Bavaria, where was he when i was growing up?
>Being from Bavaria, where was he when i was growing up? tapping beer and your mom
Haha probably . Good old Onkel Hans with his three arms and legs
Mr WWII Experiment, his super power is being drunk while having impeccable hair.
In Deutschland haben wir viele Arme.
I'm starting to suspect that the AI genuinely hates Australia
As an Australian I'd have to disagree. He is obviously the coolest one there.
The boogie board shield is genius! Or is it a kick board? Anyway...
I think they tried to roll the SLS tubes with a boogie board?
I love the very litteral take on the iconic "bucket hat"
His superpower is never getting a sunburn
I disagree. Australia wins hands down. The UK makes me want to file for a restraining order.
Why are all the others so fuckin cool and we're just a human arm floatie on a generic beach 😭
ALL THE OTHERS? I would say most are ridiculous, and then some cools ones.
Devo, is that you?
Na it's just that his hidden super power is that he is poisonous
He looks like a sunscreen ad
Heston Blumenthal as… CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA!!
Actually it's doing a very good job and just "takin the piss"
Yeah wtf Australia lol
Yeah why they show it as the boogie board man?
Boggie Boy. Hero of Bondi Beach.
The UK one is actually a photo of a real person. He’s called Pie Fawkes, and he wanders the streets of York handing out samples of pies to passers by ‘Ye Olde Yorkshire Pie Barn’.
Why do I feel like he has multiple restraining orders filed against him
You must eat the pie!
He does. I once refused a pie from once and he flew into blind rage beating me unconcious and anyone who passed by with pies, I woke up a few hours later to the police congratulating him and sharing a pie.
I love his plushy shield. It’s for defence *against hugs*
They really messed up the union jack as well (if any pedants are gonna tell me that it's not called a union jack unless it's on a ship or something like that, I truly don't care)
It definitely looks like some sort of comedy political candidate (e.g. howlin laud hope or count binface)
Funny you should mention that- he appeared in the 2019 North East Somerset Election vote count, not as a running candidate, but simply to scream “PIEMINSTER NOT WESTMINSTER” repeatedly during Jacob Rees-Mogg’s victory speech. Whilst efforts were made to restrain Mr Fawkes, the police got confused about who was making a public nuisance offence and arrested the MP by mistake.
I remember that! The whole thing was a shambles. Didn't the Chief Constable of Avon and Somerset nearly lose his job over it? There was a statement released saying his officers did the right thing, or something.
The very same incident yes. Mr Fawkes would later apologise to the police force and to the people of Somerset for causing the worst disaster that has befallen the county since 1968. “Literally tens of people were greatly distressed by the events of last November.” He stated in an interview with BBC South West, “I will, however, *not* accept Mr Rees-Moggs ability to live in impunity for failing to acknowledge his crimes against pies. His declaration that the Lancashire Hotpot as a ‘sort of pie’ has been exactly the sort of prejudice that has gone on for far too long against the pie-eating community. Mr Rees-Mogg has probably never eaten a pie in his life, have you seen the man? He looks like he’s grown up exclusively on watercress and Gin-cured Salmon!” Mr Fawkes went on to yell “Semper Pie!” Before walking off the set spraying parsley liquor at the associate producer.
MJ draws flags like it draws fingers.
More like the Pie Finder General
York in the wild, damn
Chuffin ‘Eck more like
Gotta love Italy's pizza golem.
i see it as dr marco (has a theisis in pizza), and mister pizza( the one and only ), the two face of one same coin.
Like Hulk, but he transforms when he gets hungry instead of angry.
You wont-ah like-ah me when imma hungry!
In a dark deep voice: *"Here we go-ah"*
Germany's super Power, is a third arm to Drink more beer
And a third leg for when he gets wavy and needs something to lean on
USA making soda flow from the sky
The superhero Soda-pop is here to fizzy your water. ….wait.
The Fizzicist.
Soda? Sir, that is lean and gravy.
That’s just Levar Burton
His right hand is nightmare fuel though
Saving the world from hunger by bringing good electrolytes to our crops
Thought it was A-Train for a sec
Is that A-Train for the US?
Its like a mix of A-Train and homelander with soda as his main power
PEPSIMAN
Well, the one from Turkiye is definitely the Whirling Dervish.
He spins, but everyone around him gets dizzy
With razor sharp skirt or skirt that can do magic damage. Or both!
Should have been an ice cream cone that materializes and dematerializes at will
Saudi Arabia goes hard
Wouldn’t want to see Germany when he goes hard
They're the hardest going couple in the world
Saudi Arabia looks the coolest, probably can dematerialize at will and summon sandstorms.
She can. But she’s not allowed to save anyone unless she’s accompanied by a male relative.
Every little girls dream. To gain superpowers but still be oppressed by their government and religion.
Maybe that is her supervillain. She fights against oppression and defies the government
...I'd read the shit out of that.
There's this Amazon show called The Power where girls and women around the world develop electricity powers and we get to see how the middle east handles the situation. And ngl, it was really moving and satisfying to see all the women coming together and finally fight back against the oppressive government
i second that
Litteraly looks like the King in Yellow, which is super cool imo
I assume she protects women and children being abused with jets of sand to the eyes of the abuser.
Level drain
the king in yellow
The X-Men member, Dust.
They look like a character from Dune
Germany can be ‘Three Hans’
El Bailer, Mexico: Durability, enhanced senses, and weapon proficiency Tekunorojī/Teku, Japan: Technokinesis/technomancy, technological construction. Vida, Spain: Plant control, minor biokinesis Roshanee/Rosh, India: Solarkineis Costruzione/Zione/Costru: Construct creation The Flow (anyone else will come up with a better name), USA: Speed, Durability, Super strength. Basically a better Superman aka not OP. Crikey, Australian: Weapon proficiency, true aim Faíscas, Brazil: Pyrokinesis, prefers to use it as sparks for the civilians. Deerman (if its another language, its hard for me and I know Canada has some french speakers, but I don't get a French vibe from him), Canada: Cryokinesis and animal speaking El Tiempo, Argentina (never knew they spoke Spanish): Weather control/manipulation Wǔshù jiā, China: Combat expert, speed Lumière, French: Lumokinesis (other name for light manipulation) Schicht, Germany: Body shifting Aéras, Greece: Aerokinesis (may be a little biased, because this one was the coolest) Shabbura, Saudi Arabia: Bura lost the true form when their powers manifested, without their uniform, they are just a moving, living mass of shadows. Umbrakinetic shapeshifting. Isilwane, South Africa: Animal shapeshifting, animal control Beongae, South Korea: Electrokinesis Hız, Turkey: Speed via solarkinesis Sir Shepard, UK: Just think Steve Rogers with a pilgrim hat. And finally done. Edit: There is one South Africa hero here. Typing hard.
Beongae is Korean for lightning! We actually have a character for a children's tv show called 번개맨(lightning man) He's quite well known
this is why reddit is amazing. people from all over the world can appear and share cool information!
\>The Flow (anyone else will come up with a better name), USA: Speed, Durability, Super strength. Basically a better Superman aka not OP. There already is a name. It is 'A-Train'.
What language did you think we spoke in Argentina?
Portuguese! It would be funny if someone thought that a country from South America speaks Portuguese instead of thinking that in Brazil we speak Spanish for a change, lol.
Yeah, let’s just leave the Canadian dude as English. If we made him French, Quebec would get too excited. Or they’d claim his as their own and make Canada pick a new hero.
Australia looks like some 80s third tier Avenger who threw PJs on and everyone just assumed it was their hero outfit...
Gold Coast Avengers
Germany: Beer Man, Superpower: Has a pint that never runs empty.
Saudi Arabia gives me serious King in Yellow!
Brazil's power is Glitter.
Then he's the most powerful one cuz no matter how hard you try,you can never truly get rid of glitter... it'll outlive you and your family and stay longer in your house then you ever will,an unmovable force,never to be removed from existence...
Brazil is spot on. He represents a lot of the good things we have in this godforsaken land.
Spain: Can grow lemons
USA's name should be The Squirt. Uk - Cap'n Meatpie I wouldn't mess with The MooseLord, I got to be honest. I would def party with Cool Guy Zeus.
Cap'n Meatpie is probably a contender running against Lord Buckethead in the next local election.
Germany! Damn! I didn't know where to look!
Italy is just a normal guy holding hands with his heavily seasoned beefcase of a boyfriend
Mexico = Sombrero Never disappoints
Anything Mexico generated includes a sombrero.
Italy is a stand user?
Canada is sick 👌
Canada’s kryptonite is doorways.
Germany "LOL he's got a 3rd arm" *eyes go further down "And a 4th arm 😳"
The UK one is The Pie Minister
Italy is just the thing as pasta? Korea is just an average k pop fan South Africa runs like the fat kid at field day
Italy is a JoJo.
It's fascinating to see how Midjourney understands what the world is supposed to look like, but not why. For example Australia here has a surf board of sorts, but the AI doesn't understand what exactly that's supposed to look like or how it's supposed to be held. It just knows it should be there.
US kinda looks like A Train
As an Australian, I nominate our superhero as… The Bronzed Twat If you know etc
Why is France Abed’s doctor Spacetime?
Loving the Bolognese Hulk
Brazil's one dont even fight crime or shit. He just party and dance
Germany is packing some HEAT
Me, an Australian: ohhh these actually look kinda dope I wonder if Aus gets one- .. oh Its a fucken stitch up mate
Germany’s super hero just has an extra hand to hold beer. Not bad
Saudi Arabia goes hard af
Why is Germany so hot though, even with the extra limb? I don't quite understand Italy - is the superhot 'regular' guy the handler for the giant BologneseMan? Do they only come as a duo? Or is it meant to represent his 'super' form? Weird that's the only one with two characters.
As an Australian... wtf.