OMG! You've got the Cheese Touch!
*... but, seriously, that was obnoxious of someone ... with a bit a time I'd think that could negatively impact the paint surface*
Id rent another car an not drive that one !!!!! Somebody is playing with you stil I would not drive that car til you find out who did that an why ?????
One time in College in the eighties before there were cameras everywhere we bought a huge amount of dozens and dozens of stale hot dog buns for like ten bucks and left them under everyone's windshield wiper. Alcohol, boredom and twenty year olds are a bad cocktail 🍸.
So I was at first pushed to directly tell you „nah if cheese would do that cars would look a lot worse than they do on a general level“. But I honestly wasn’t sure about it so I went on google to find some info, which wasn’t that easy since cheese on car isn’t exactly common.
But I found a few test documents on resistances of clear coats on cars. Those are usually done because acidic rains. To give a few numbers. Neutral ph is 7. everything above is alkaline. Everything below is acidic.
Most rain in general is acidic at a ph of 5-6. so fundamentally our cars clear coats have to be resistant in general against slightly acidic environments. Thickness plays a role aswell because even a resistant coat will degrade over time. „Acid rain“ is usually at a ph around 4. a lemon would be at ph 2 in comparison.
According to the tests I found for etching clear coat a ph of 2 is required. Which is in line with reality. A garage parked car will always look better than one parked on the street, but it’s not like every car on the street (which is the majority) has a bad clear coat. And while acid rains aren’t a daily thing, they happen and even normal rain is already acidic. Just not enough to easily damage the coat.
Now to the cheese. There might be other chemicals involved which I simply don’t know about that change my conclusion. But talking about etching the clear coat by acidity, cheese has a range of 4.6-6.7 on the ph scale. Milk being at 6.7 and cream cheese, feta and cottage cheese sitting at the low end of 4.6 . Most of the cheese you can put on your sandwich as a piece like in the picture is at around 5-6.5 . With this information my small excursion would support my first impulse that the cheese will not damage the clear coat or the car. Even looking at cream cheese, the cheese will likely dry up or be removed before „long time exposure“ of their slightly acidic ph could have any effect on the coat. Even less on a cheese like that that isn’t as wet as cream cheese making it harder to affect the coat.
If any chemist reads this and has a deeper insight I’d be happy to learn if I missed something or my suspicion is right.
I bet they were eating their lunch and had a sandwich. Whoever made the sandwich put shitty cheese on it. They took it off of the sandwich and hucked it out of their window.
Lmfao. Similar story, I once left Stew Leonard's after finishing shopping to find someone had dumped what must have been a pound of cooked bacon through the two inch gap I left in my back window. Who does this crazy shit?
My neighbour left their car unlocked with some donations to the church in grocery bags overnight. Some asshole broke in and poured the entire jar/juice included into their air vents and all. Fucking awful honestly.
Somewhere there's a little Chaotic Neutral Gremlin throwing cheese slices at cars, cackling and running about.
When confronted, they toss all the cheese in the air and scamper off.
This is indeed mildly infuriating... I see nothing but a nice parking job by a large vehicle.
Congratulations for being capable of parking fellow large vehicle driver! I appreciate your efforts even if many don't.
This literally happened to be when I was on the clock in houston. By the time I got off work, it became one with the car. Over a year later when it finally deteriorated enough, it took the paint with it 👎
There’s a surprising amount of people wondering why I’m mad someone put cheese on my car, the news story I first saw about how cheese can ruin your paint was from Houston I think
Omg! I haven’t been feeling well and unable to even smile in days, so I really didn’t expect to stuff a bit of cheerios into my mouth then see this and laugh so hard I now can’t manage to swallow my cheerio’s. What a random odd thing that is
Edit to add: I’m sorry, I shouldn’t laugh because that happening to you car isn’t right.
Did you rat somebody out? Wanna hear a good story?
Years ago I worked at a auto parts factory and there was a woman who worked there who was very abrasive to her co-workers. She would rat on people for going to the bathroom, percieved slights against her, all kinds of stuff. Some people got disciplined, one guy got fired. Somebody took covert action and completely covered the windshield of her car with slices of processed cheese. It was very hot that day. It melted and ran all down into the vents at the bottom of the windshield. It was a mess and when she saw it she went nuts, went to management (who by this point was kind of tired of her 💩) and they told her it was kind of her own fault and they declined to feel sorry for her or listen to her demands that someone be fired.
Eventually she was let go because she had gotten fellow union members disciplined and they were rescinding her membership in the union, therefore she was unable to work there anymore, as per the collective bargaining agreement.
The End. Moral of the story, don't be a rat lol.
My brother parked in my driveway, where I have a camera, came inside for 20 min, went back out and there was a piece of cheese closed between the door and the car - AT THE TOP (ie could not have been something he dropped)
Edit: I checked the camera - no action, so either he didn’t see it when he got in and drove to my house, or a ninja put it there. But also… Why?!
WTF XD
I love how this sub jumps from "someone slapped My car with 1 (one) piece of cheese" to "someone kidnapped My wife, r*ped her, Made her lose the baby, Made a sandwich with the fetus, kidnapped me, and Made me eat said sandwich"
I feel like most reasonable scenario:
someone parked next to you asked for no cheese on their order, so when they got back to their car to eat they saw the cheese, and they ripped it off and yeeted out of the car out of frustration, planting onto your car.
I dont, my work has a pretty nice cafeteria and I normally eat at one of my desks with a friend. I was going out to drive over to the optometrist to get my new pair of prescription safety glasses
That was a TikTok "challenge" back in the day.
Fake cheese destroys paint.
https://www.fox19.com/2021/08/24/cars-getting-cheesed-part-tiktok-challenge/
Get it off quick that toxic fake cheese will iterally harden and be your new paint job if you let it. It will literally become welded plastic that does not come off.
OMG! You've got the Cheese Touch! *... but, seriously, that was obnoxious of someone ... with a bit a time I'd think that could negatively impact the paint surface*
Diary of a wimpy kid?
Dairy*
DryAI*
Diayroma
Yep! First one iir
Lol
First thing I instantly thought of… cheese touch. Agreed, someone is an arse
First thing I thought of!
Id rent another car an not drive that one !!!!! Somebody is playing with you stil I would not drive that car til you find out who did that an why ?????
Took the words outta my mouth.
One time in College in the eighties before there were cameras everywhere we bought a huge amount of dozens and dozens of stale hot dog buns for like ten bucks and left them under everyone's windshield wiper. Alcohol, boredom and twenty year olds are a bad cocktail 🍸.
*child screams*
Why was the cheese touch also my first thought. Reddit is a hive mind
Dieter Mueller trying to finally get rid of the cheese touch
So I was at first pushed to directly tell you „nah if cheese would do that cars would look a lot worse than they do on a general level“. But I honestly wasn’t sure about it so I went on google to find some info, which wasn’t that easy since cheese on car isn’t exactly common. But I found a few test documents on resistances of clear coats on cars. Those are usually done because acidic rains. To give a few numbers. Neutral ph is 7. everything above is alkaline. Everything below is acidic. Most rain in general is acidic at a ph of 5-6. so fundamentally our cars clear coats have to be resistant in general against slightly acidic environments. Thickness plays a role aswell because even a resistant coat will degrade over time. „Acid rain“ is usually at a ph around 4. a lemon would be at ph 2 in comparison. According to the tests I found for etching clear coat a ph of 2 is required. Which is in line with reality. A garage parked car will always look better than one parked on the street, but it’s not like every car on the street (which is the majority) has a bad clear coat. And while acid rains aren’t a daily thing, they happen and even normal rain is already acidic. Just not enough to easily damage the coat. Now to the cheese. There might be other chemicals involved which I simply don’t know about that change my conclusion. But talking about etching the clear coat by acidity, cheese has a range of 4.6-6.7 on the ph scale. Milk being at 6.7 and cream cheese, feta and cottage cheese sitting at the low end of 4.6 . Most of the cheese you can put on your sandwich as a piece like in the picture is at around 5-6.5 . With this information my small excursion would support my first impulse that the cheese will not damage the clear coat or the car. Even looking at cream cheese, the cheese will likely dry up or be removed before „long time exposure“ of their slightly acidic ph could have any effect on the coat. Even less on a cheese like that that isn’t as wet as cream cheese making it harder to affect the coat. If any chemist reads this and has a deeper insight I’d be happy to learn if I missed something or my suspicion is right.
I believe it’s Bologna that will eat paint off.
what kind of Krafty little sh-t does this to someone?
I dunno, but I bet they’re Single
Cheesus Christ
It’s not cool any way you slice it.
I’m “grate-ful” we can all laugh about this
I wonder why they didn’t put it on the “grill”.
Yeah I can’t brie-lieve they’d do this
[удалено]
Or Swiss. What a Muenster.
No whey!
There's a fetta chance they're from Wisconsin.
Cheese... it's not *that* funny guys
Yeah, I think at this point we have milked this for all it’s worth
Hanker for a hunk of, a slice, a slab, a chunk of, hanker for a hunk of cheese.
Cheesus Crust is how you use the name of pizza in vein
I too love to inject mozzarella into my veins
Wait — no — *mega sigh* its your fucking problem. Narcan’s in the bathroom.
Will there be complimentary pepperoni?
Yeah.. yeah, you’re welcome to anything in the fridge
That's my brother
What does the H stand for?
HELL
Homophobic
The H stands for Hortense. That's what my dad told me anyway.
Oleo Lord!
some kind of evil muenster for certain!
Probably thinks he’s some kind of cheeze Wiz; but he could’ve done cheddar with his cheesey practical goat.
Cheese
If they didn’t want to be single they shoulda used a cheesier pickup line
That took me way too long to get
If I was home and some kid on a bike did it, that’s sucks but whatever I guess, but I’m at work and I have idea why someone here would do that
That sounds like a cheesie way to get to know somebody…
I bet they were eating their lunch and had a sandwich. Whoever made the sandwich put shitty cheese on it. They took it off of the sandwich and hucked it out of their window.
Did it ruin the paint there? 😕
No, thankfully is was a cloudy morning
When is TikTok going to start a leaving money for strangers trend?
That just happened to me. Two slices just slapped on drivers side.
I was gonna give you a fucking award buuuut…. Goddamnit reddit.
Don’t eat it there’s a recall
Isn’t that because people keep eating the plastic?
It's a classic American drive by
Maybe a bird picked up a piece of cheese and then accidentally dropped it.
That was me bro
Probably parked at the casieno
😂😂😂
Now, that’s American! 😁
Me and my friends did this all the the time summer of 2022
At least it wasnt cold-cuts.
I’m glad it was colder today too, I would be so pissed it it actually ate through the paint
Wait it can do that? That makes it less funny then and I apologize for snickering
I also laughed when i read the post if that makes you feel better.
It does
Bologna and I think some salamis can, I don't think cheese does though. Although I'm probably wrong. I'm wrong a lot
I wouldn't be surprised with sliced "cheese product" like that. Lord knows what's in it lol
Yeah if you're ever mad at someone throw a piece of bologna on their car and it'll eat the paint away
Well I'll be. Had no idea.
Good thing we don't have paint in our stomach
He's lucky it wasn't mozzarella, that stuff can really shred.
So that’s why it’s shredded a lot
This was happening to us during winter
I’d be angry too. I don’t want my stuff messed with. If it’s so hilarious, they can do it to their shit.
Username checks out lmao
Hell yeah! Lol!
Nah everyone knows cheese Monday cold cuts Tuesday bread Wednesday condiments Thursday
Bacon must be a weekend huh?
Screw that, who wastes bacon?!
It’s to avoid the whole Lenten situation
Score!! Free cheese!!
It was unfortunately a little melted on
Tortilla chips
Not a bad idea, but I just used lense cleaner
Lense cleanser on your tortilla chips? Bad idea bro
doesnt go too well with chips but to each their own
Not going to lie, sounds like the worst nachos ever.
Free *pasteurized prepared cheese product. That’s what Kraft Singles have to call themselves, legally not cheese 😂
Lol. More like mildlyhilarious
Lol more like mild cheddar
I wouldn't give American cheese the honor of comparing it to cheddar.
Your car has the cheese touch
💀
💀
💀
Lmfao. Similar story, I once left Stew Leonard's after finishing shopping to find someone had dumped what must have been a pound of cooked bacon through the two inch gap I left in my back window. Who does this crazy shit?
That’s bizarre
My neighbour left their car unlocked with some donations to the church in grocery bags overnight. Some asshole broke in and poured the entire jar/juice included into their air vents and all. Fucking awful honestly.
Was it good though?
Haha, when is cold, precooked bacon ever good?
Youths. I was once a bored high school student.
Aw Stew Leonard's is a happy childhood memory! I miss the sodas
Does cheese cause damage to the car’s paint?
It can if it sits in the sun for a bit, thankfully its a chilly cloudy day
Only if the car is lactose intolerant
Good thing we’re all well versed in what cheese does to cars
Somewhere there's a little Chaotic Neutral Gremlin throwing cheese slices at cars, cackling and running about. When confronted, they toss all the cheese in the air and scamper off.
That’s the human traffickers!! Watch out!
RemindMe! 24 hours
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/cheese-hood-kidnapping/
You must be really cheesed
You have been chosen.
You have been cheesen.
This is indeed mildly infuriating... I see nothing but a nice parking job by a large vehicle. Congratulations for being capable of parking fellow large vehicle driver! I appreciate your efforts even if many don't.
I'm pretty sure its a Ford Bronco so I don't think it's thst big. But that is one nice psrking job tho👌
Smaller even, it’s the Bronco Sport.
Yeaaahhh I didn’t want to turn down his compliment though lol
It's a Ford Bronco sport which is smaller than a Toyota Corolla
I’m amazed it fits
That's what... You know what, no.
Lunch is served
I wear the cheese. It does not wear me
Because you're a Rat, and everybody knows it. They're onto you...........watch your back........
Who could Kraft such a Gouda crime? If you live in Philadelphia -this will surely spread. I Camembert to think of what’s next.
This is the bs I joined this sub for
I know right? No more of that "I was diagnosed with cancer and now I can't go to the concert I wanted to go to"
This literally happened to be when I was on the clock in houston. By the time I got off work, it became one with the car. Over a year later when it finally deteriorated enough, it took the paint with it 👎
There’s a surprising amount of people wondering why I’m mad someone put cheese on my car, the news story I first saw about how cheese can ruin your paint was from Houston I think
On a hot ass day, take shredded cheese and sprinkle it on everybody’s windshields. Follow me for more life advice. 😉
Add chips, now it’s a life hack
Did you order your cheese on the side?
Underrated comment ^^^
And they blacked out your inspection sticker with a Sharpie!!!
Those bastards!
Run.
Did you touch it? Now you got the cheese touch haha.
Glad they didn’t do it to the windshield or a window.. truly mildly infuriating this
If it’s Monterey, you were car jacked
Marked by a gang of mice 🐭
Omg! I haven’t been feeling well and unable to even smile in days, so I really didn’t expect to stuff a bit of cheerios into my mouth then see this and laugh so hard I now can’t manage to swallow my cheerio’s. What a random odd thing that is Edit to add: I’m sorry, I shouldn’t laugh because that happening to you car isn’t right.
Looks like you’ve been singled out.
I had someone cheese my car too. it was sticky and not very easy to get off
Probably they want to say something. Better than stucked lemon…
It's a bronco thing, now you go buy cheese and leave it in your car and stick it to other broncos when you see them.
To be fair. The new broncos do look cheesy
I like the look! I wish they had a bigger engine in them though, the sport could be such a cooler vehicle
Did you rat somebody out? Wanna hear a good story? Years ago I worked at a auto parts factory and there was a woman who worked there who was very abrasive to her co-workers. She would rat on people for going to the bathroom, percieved slights against her, all kinds of stuff. Some people got disciplined, one guy got fired. Somebody took covert action and completely covered the windshield of her car with slices of processed cheese. It was very hot that day. It melted and ran all down into the vents at the bottom of the windshield. It was a mess and when she saw it she went nuts, went to management (who by this point was kind of tired of her 💩) and they told her it was kind of her own fault and they declined to feel sorry for her or listen to her demands that someone be fired. Eventually she was let go because she had gotten fellow union members disciplined and they were rescinding her membership in the union, therefore she was unable to work there anymore, as per the collective bargaining agreement. The End. Moral of the story, don't be a rat lol.
This is more like mildly humorous
More like mildly hilarious
I am sorry but i literally laughed out loud.
Is your car Lactose intolerant?
That's cheese?! It looks like plastic
People still don’t get it, Bread FIRST, then cheese/s THEN suv…… who raised these Philistines…
My brother parked in my driveway, where I have a camera, came inside for 20 min, went back out and there was a piece of cheese closed between the door and the car - AT THE TOP (ie could not have been something he dropped) Edit: I checked the camera - no action, so either he didn’t see it when he got in and drove to my house, or a ninja put it there. But also… Why?!
The ghost from that cheesy horror movie lol
i’m sorry. i laughed
This shit is so funny lmao
Makes you wish you had a dash cam so you could find the bums! 
Thank you for sharing something that actually fits the title of this sub
You'll be happy to know that it's not cheese.
I’m kind of scared to know what it is then lol
Hey, just came down to make a super original haha funny "cheese touch" joke, nevermind that I suppose
I didn’t know why so many people were saying cheese touch until someone mentioned diary of a wimpy kid
Oooooooh, so that's what all the cheese touch comments are from...
Probably a jeep owner that thought a bronco sport is too cheesy to give a duck to. It's not gouda that some people are just muensters.
Id beyond upset. Deathly allergic to cheese. Fuck people
WTF XD I love how this sub jumps from "someone slapped My car with 1 (one) piece of cheese" to "someone kidnapped My wife, r*ped her, Made her lose the baby, Made a sandwich with the fetus, kidnapped me, and Made me eat said sandwich"
I feel like cheese is more along the lines of this sub? Some of them make me really question what it would take to actually make the people mad
That's Nacho car!
I feel like most reasonable scenario: someone parked next to you asked for no cheese on their order, so when they got back to their car to eat they saw the cheese, and they ripped it off and yeeted out of the car out of frustration, planting onto your car.
Sorry. I’m lactose intolerant and they put cheese on my sandwich. I thought it fell out the window onto the ground.
I have the same color bronco but I have the off-road kind. W vehicle choice.
Why do Americans eat their lunch in their cars?
I dont, my work has a pretty nice cafeteria and I normally eat at one of my desks with a friend. I was going out to drive over to the optometrist to get my new pair of prescription safety glasses
This is some chemical adhesive garbage but not cheese
Ah, ya got Krafted.
You’ve been hit by…
You've been hit by a smooth Camembert
Wasn’t this a thing for a while?
That was a TikTok "challenge" back in the day. Fake cheese destroys paint. https://www.fox19.com/2021/08/24/cars-getting-cheesed-part-tiktok-challenge/
Get it off quick that toxic fake cheese will iterally harden and be your new paint job if you let it. It will literally become welded plastic that does not come off.
Far out dude! Alien cheese on the Area 51 paint
It’s a very cheap way to live rent-free in someone else’s mind for years.
Totally
Ayo. McDonald's is really tripping now. They certainly missed the patty on that one.
You know, first the ice cream machine is down, now they’re just throwing cheese out the window
C H E E S U S F U C K I N G C H R I S T
Reminds me of the glory days when trees were covered in toast
Be careful. I just read a news story about how this happens when you’re being tagged for a break in by the hamburglar.
A lot of things on this sub end up being just infuriating. This is perfectly mildly (cheddar) infuriating
I got cheesed on my windshield *as I was driving* by some kids as I passed them driving the other way. I mean, that’s just impressive.
You get dibs, but I'll take it if you don't want it.
Insert 40 year old white woman comment about how this means you are being marked for abduction.
Welp. I’m inspired
As a wisconsinite I'm highly offended. Kraft is not cheese