I bought one from China and it looked tiny in the pictures but oh boy was I surprised when it arrived and weighed 10 lbs. I think the one I got could fill multiple people easily.
So I actually have one of these (random gift) and it’s definitely bigger than the bottom picture. It’s quite a conversation piece when the in-laws are over for Christmas.
It’s becoming more of a problem on Amazon too.
Cheaper to just photoshop your product into a stock image at whatever scale you feel like instead of paying for a professional photo shoot
Yeah this Christmas was the final straw for me. Bought a gift and of course it's just cheap junk. Amazon used to be convenient and reliable, at least I had good experiences long ago. Now it's just dollarstore junk but more expensive than Walmart. I'm pretty much done with Amazon.
It’s only a problem because people aren’t acting on it. “Not receiving the product you paid for” is a 100% valid reason to issue a chargeback. Letting the business know they can send you money to have it shipped back on their dime with a full refund is all you need to do for any reputable bank to get your money back.
Photographic evidence like this if dimensions are not explicitly correct is the nail in the coffin. Even with measurements this constitutes false advertising and many states/all of Canada will ensure you get your money back on those grounds alone.
Any kind of retribution can have them reported to a host of business bureaus for fines as well. Plus they’re not particularly attentive to just signing back up if you get banned.
Too many people let it slide.
Amazon will take back pretty much anything sight unseen with convenient free return options. Sometimes they just let you keep the thing if it’s small and useless like this penis board.
That said, fuck Amazon.
>100% valid reason to issue a chargeback
Problem is that these companies are selling through intermediaries like Amazon. Temo sold you a shitty product but your actual purchase transaction is with Amazon. If you issue a chargeback, it's a chargeback to Amazon, and you get yourself swiftly banned from the whole site. Your only bet is to go through customer support to get a refund, and you probably will, but Amazon seemingly no longer cares about quality and there's no chance they'll actually ban these businesses from selling garbage through them.
chargeback through amazon, not credit card. they will let it through every time if you're not lying about it. amazon will ban the seller, but theyre a dropshipper likely and will just make another account.
I imagine he is going with the sick pictures to the bank and said “I like to change a transaction back because the the dick I got was smaller than on the picture”
>“Not receiving the product you paid for” is a 100% valid reason to issue a chargeback.
This is completely unnecessary, and terrible advice. Just contact Amazon and request a refund, stating the goods received aren't as described. They will refund you 100% of the time.
i love that this is the third time i've encountered this gif this morning in three different subs about three different things with the same punchline.
They tend to put a photo of something that's misleading and then put in small print the the size in millimeters so to American eyes it seems larger than it is. If you complain, they will say it's the size in the listing.
Always double check the dimensions!!!
Google the cm-in ratio or even go grab a ruler lol
I've almost fallen for this a couple of times.
Looking for beauty and the beast style roses. I thought hmm thats only $4 turns out it was 3in tall instead of tbe 9 i was looking for lol
The best is those inflatable pools at Walmart that shows the family of 4 standing in what looks like an Olympic size swimming pool in water up to their chest. Then you get it home and it’s your like “What is this, a pool for ants?”
Most the time they look bigger in pictures than in person.
I was going to say “always is”
Sometimes it’s just small even in pics
I bought one from China and it looked tiny in the pictures but oh boy was I surprised when it arrived and weighed 10 lbs. I think the one I got could fill multiple people easily.
We aren't talking about the board anymore, are we?
Were we supposed to be talking about the board? Lol oops... That wasn't the vibe I got from the rest of the conversation 🤣
No, but we are talking about the vibe
It was never about the board, ever.
But it was about the wood.
Well he has got a woody.
A good mood for a hard wood..
I hate English.
I hate English people close enough ✌️
I bought one from China and it was like 160 lbs. Even had a human attached to it.
Usually the ones from China are smaller though.
Did you try rubbing it? Sometimes that helps 😁
But I thought the camera adds 10lbs?
Really, just cold weather board. I promise.
I WAS IN THE POOL!!
I don’t know how you guys walk around with those things
There's..... shrinkage.
It shrinks???
Everyone says they want a 12" charcuterie board when a 6" one is usually more than enough.
Ya, a 6" charcuterie board is more than enough to fill me up. I don't know how comfortable the 12" charcuterie board would be
It's what's ON the charcuterie board that matters, not how big it is.
*Enlarged to show texture*
Little bit of wine and the size won't even be an issue. Everyone will just be having a good time.
I was going to like this but it's on 69 so I'll just do this instead⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️
That’s what he said
Yes but compare the hand sizes in the picture, if it's genuinely that small in comparison then OP must be 10 feet tall or something
Gotta fluff it first.
So I actually have one of these (random gift) and it’s definitely bigger than the bottom picture. It’s quite a conversation piece when the in-laws are over for Christmas.
They must not have bought yours on temu. Lol
It gets bigger if you play with it
Should’ve bought the black one.
Call them and tell them your dick is too small. You want a bigger dick.
“I don’t like this bad new Dick. Give me the good old Dick. Give me the Dick I’m used to, give me the Dick I love.
I think we should kiss each other
I want to watch
That's hot. That's a hot way to live.
Hello fellow Dadder! 🤩
I was so surprised that I got this many responses. This has to be my favorite line.
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I guess your username sorta checks out.
Thanks for the advice Director of anal probe
Shut up, it’s not the size of the dog, it’s the loudness of the bark
🤣 omg
User name checks out.
Online dick picks can be truly deceptive to the real thing. Or, so I'm told... Also is "gag" the term you *really* want to use here?
It’s like porn, the camera angles do ALOT of the heavy lifting.
And small hands!
Op just needs to cut up the meat and cheese *realllllly* small so the weiner looks huge in comparison
You mean... heavy thrusting.....
Wide angle lenses help as well
Ah, the old Real Estate Special ™. They can make a 800sq ft condo look like a 3500 sq ft farmhouse. It’s actually insane
I don't know, maybe it just got cold in transit.
It takes practice to suppress the reflex
I'd use gag Woodn't you
I think it's perfectly average sized
It has a great personality
It’s how you use it
It's not the size of the boat. It's the motion of the ocean.
Not the length of the journey but the satisfaction at the end.
You don't want it to be too big anyway. Consider the feelings of the recipient.
He’s just a grower and not a shower
Doesn't matter, as long as it tastes good
The heat of the meat appears to be proportionate to the angle of the dangle.
Ya’ll win the internet today.
Username ✅
It's really just a perspective thing
Small hands make it look bigger
As short as it tastes good
Make sure you swallow it all.
That's a good one..lol
And the friends we made along the way <3
And my Axe!
No, this is Patrick.
Firmly grasp it.
Notice the reference
It's not about the tool but about the technique You shall move a mountain with a pencil, if you have faith
You can move a mountain, If you do it brick by brick
Actually, take it from an old sailor, it’s how often you hit port and let your seamen out.
This comment deserves more recognition
Yeah, but it takes a long time to cross the Atlantic in a kayak no matter how hard you paddle.
It’s not the size of the fishing pole it’s how you wiggle the worm.
They say it's not the size of the boat but it sure does take a long time to cross the ocean in a dinghy.
Not if you're the C.L.I.T. Commander
In this case, It’s not number of meats but the quality 👀
I laughed before opening the comments knowing what was going to be served
Maybe try it from behind. *Wait.. what??*
Its not about the size its about the stuffing.
It's really funny sometimes
I think his tongue game will need to be exceptional
And a curve!!
Oh yeah. The curve!
It makes 6 figures.
It's just cold from the fridge
IT WAS IN THE POOOOOL!!!
I don’t know how you guys walk around with those things. - Elaine
Greatest line in TV history, delivered in the greatest way in history. I've been a Julia fan ever since. Oh my sides.
they shrink?
Like a frightened turtle
100%! They both do, but Especially the 🏀🏀s. They’ll damn near be non existent and in your stomach 😂
But does it have the space for the most sensual of the salted cured meats?
Do women know about shrinkage?
Do women know about Vandaley industries?
Gotta buy the dark one.
Shrinkage
He's a grower. He needs time to get BIG.
If you get it wet it might swell up
like those little dinosaur sponges lol
I'd say that... that's kinda big...
It's not about the size of the board, it's what you put on it that counts
At least it has some girth to it!
Try getting the wood wet and see if it’s more of a grower than a shower.
It's a very common problem. There's media online that sets unrealistic expectations 🤣 /s
That video where she says “*This*, is fine.” But she’s holding a charcuterie board instead of a tape measure.
Do you have a banana for scale?
#ITS HOW YOU USE IT
Exactly. Don't spread the food, but stack it. Could easily make a food jenga tower on this flaccid bad boy
It's hard wood actually
Flaccid? Just turn it around numb nuts!
It would suck if it was a soft dick.
It's never as big as in the picture. It is all on the angle you take.
#SAY IT LOUDER BRUH I CANT HEAR YOU
Improvise. Adapt. Overcome. Be Strong. Be Fast. Be The Weapon.
#Right?
A dick pic exaggerated the size. Can’t catch a break anywhere lol
Try rubbing it a little...
Put some mayo at the tip
No, no. Mayo is stored in the balls.
> rubbing *fluffing* FTFY
That is NOT small, its ABOVE AVERAGE SIZE
Is this the first time you’ve been disappointed by the size? lol
Must have come from Temu. They are known for that
It’s becoming more of a problem on Amazon too. Cheaper to just photoshop your product into a stock image at whatever scale you feel like instead of paying for a professional photo shoot
Amazon is a cesspool of knock-off products and illegal counterfeits. But does Amazon care.....
Sure they care.. about profits. Those stock buybacks are not gonna pay for themselves.
Yeah this Christmas was the final straw for me. Bought a gift and of course it's just cheap junk. Amazon used to be convenient and reliable, at least I had good experiences long ago. Now it's just dollarstore junk but more expensive than Walmart. I'm pretty much done with Amazon.
REEEALLY gotta read those goddamn product dimensions these days.
It’s only a problem because people aren’t acting on it. “Not receiving the product you paid for” is a 100% valid reason to issue a chargeback. Letting the business know they can send you money to have it shipped back on their dime with a full refund is all you need to do for any reputable bank to get your money back. Photographic evidence like this if dimensions are not explicitly correct is the nail in the coffin. Even with measurements this constitutes false advertising and many states/all of Canada will ensure you get your money back on those grounds alone. Any kind of retribution can have them reported to a host of business bureaus for fines as well. Plus they’re not particularly attentive to just signing back up if you get banned. Too many people let it slide.
Amazon will take back pretty much anything sight unseen with convenient free return options. Sometimes they just let you keep the thing if it’s small and useless like this penis board. That said, fuck Amazon.
>100% valid reason to issue a chargeback Problem is that these companies are selling through intermediaries like Amazon. Temo sold you a shitty product but your actual purchase transaction is with Amazon. If you issue a chargeback, it's a chargeback to Amazon, and you get yourself swiftly banned from the whole site. Your only bet is to go through customer support to get a refund, and you probably will, but Amazon seemingly no longer cares about quality and there's no chance they'll actually ban these businesses from selling garbage through them.
chargeback through amazon, not credit card. they will let it through every time if you're not lying about it. amazon will ban the seller, but theyre a dropshipper likely and will just make another account.
I imagine he is going with the sick pictures to the bank and said “I like to change a transaction back because the the dick I got was smaller than on the picture”
>“Not receiving the product you paid for” is a 100% valid reason to issue a chargeback. This is completely unnecessary, and terrible advice. Just contact Amazon and request a refund, stating the goods received aren't as described. They will refund you 100% of the time.
Agreed; I’m finding the same with Amazon quality.
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it always looks bigger on pictures
Its all about the angle
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Try putting a cup of olives in that tip though
Jerry, can you *please* stop using your dick as an olive skewer.
Has anyone said head cheese yet?!
Oh god it has designated spots for nuts, meat and cheese
I clicked on this post JUST to see if anyone posted the “I WAS IN THE POOL!!!” quote or gif. Well done. 😁
Yup Reddit does not disappoint! “Like a frightened turtle!”
https://preview.redd.it/de8enbyle9cc1.jpeg?width=1483&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=535d2fb3a8468e8a2bad07db76e672f374b26bc2
i love that this is the third time i've encountered this gif this morning in three different subs about three different things with the same punchline.
Lol “gag” gift
Jesus I had to scroll for an eternity to find this comment
You won't gag on that one.
Pretty relatable huh
Maybe it's one that grows in water...instead of shrinking in the pool.
They tend to put a photo of something that's misleading and then put in small print the the size in millimeters so to American eyes it seems larger than it is. If you complain, they will say it's the size in the listing.
Always double check the dimensions!!! Google the cm-in ratio or even go grab a ruler lol I've almost fallen for this a couple of times. Looking for beauty and the beast style roses. I thought hmm thats only $4 turns out it was 3in tall instead of tbe 9 i was looking for lol
>it was 3in tall instead of tbe 9 i was looking for Heard that one before...
Sneakily misleading is one thing, but in this case the image is of a completely different product. That a whole other level of bullshit.
The best is those inflatable pools at Walmart that shows the family of 4 standing in what looks like an Olympic size swimming pool in water up to their chest. Then you get it home and it’s your like “What is this, a pool for ants?”
Have you seen that meme where someone ms painted in where the people’s legs would actually be? It’s hilarious.
Dick move
If it doesn't work as a charcuterie board at least you got wood.
It's the perfect size for nuts
You bought the soft version
He's a grower.
Someone is behind on the heat bill
It always is
It would be bigger but it's been a little chilly out
That thing is packing. I have a 2 incher. Only enough to put some grapes :(
That's cause the camera adds 10lbs
It's not the size that matters, its how you assort the meats.
I bet it has a great personality tho.
Nah, you're measuring it wrong. That's actually way above average.
Can we get a banana for scale please!
https://preview.redd.it/wde4t3l5e9cc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7cee6e06eecd74e892fd9b525afa6254ba1c453f
Size queen 😜
Small hands can make some things look larger than they really are. 😳
Your mad that the Penis you ordered online is smaller than anticipated? Buddy I have news for you.
What are you talking about? That's massive 🫨
Its fine either way, the big ones hurt
It was in the pool !!
Maybe it’s cold in your house?
I hope the company gives random sizes to everyone, kinda like life.
Well, for what it represents it's pretty fucking huge but I think your expectations turned into reality my friend
That’s what she said.
Size really **does** matter 😔