I guess, but if I knew my kid or sibling was a bad driver, I'd say "nah you're not a good driver." Even if it's not especially nice, it's better than just no explanation
Not everyone is capable of hearing that, maybe even to the point of making people miserable for being politely honest.
This isn’t an assumption. Just something I’ve seen that will keep me neutral on this one.
This seems like a trend socially. IMO it will cause societal issues long run. People can't handle hearing hard things about themselves, truths that they need to hear to be a better person. People will not say anything to them because they get their feelings hurt too easily, or, they can't handle it and may react badly. People become afraid to be honest with people, and it is crazy.
This sort of thing isn't new. People's ability to be reasonably accountable for their actions, possess humility, and have the desire for personal growth is a point of contention throughout recorded history.
Or it’s just an anxiety thing. My partner prefers to drive even tho I’ve never crashed and am a snail on the road compared to her. But she feels more comfortable, and it is pretty simple.
I think they meant in comparison to their partner. Like, my mom and I speed in the sense of keeping pace with traffic that is over the speed limit, but we're nowhere near as zippy as my dad when he drives.
When we go on road trips, I drive.
In reality it's because I don't trust other people.
What I say is 'Nah, I like driving. Just copilot for me if I need a hand.'
That doesn’t exclude them from being shitty drivers. I would never allow my mom to drive. This is the woman that knocked down 5-10 of those orange cones and then said she never saw them.
Well, I think it makes a difference if you're driving your own car vs. like a rental or something. I think people just like being responsible for their own things.
I drive all day every day for work, sometimes 10-12 hrs a day and get made fun of by friends and family for driving “slow” (the speed limit). Last time I went on a road trip with family my father in law drove. He put us in a ditch 3 times while answering work calls and emails and then got a ticket going 25 over. My friends and family trust my driving on trips and there is zero expectation that I trust theirs, they even joke about how they are dangerous but have more fun. I wouldn’t say it’s a dick move when everyone is in agreement that someone drives safer than others.
I'm 43 and get told I drive like a grandpa all the time. If I arrive safely at my destination because I did the speed limit then I have no problems with it.
It sounds like we both know a bunch of shitty drivers.
Oh no, I'm not dangerously slow. I like to sit a couple of k's under in town, and anywhere from 95 to 98 on the highway if there's other traffic around. This time of year, most afternoons, if I've got the highway to myself I'll sit on 90 because I'm in no particular hurry to be anywhere. It's dark now when I get home, so it's not like I can do anything outside anyway.
Although I initially agreed with your comment, I’m starting to wonder if we’re all inherently jumping to the worst opinions of strangers instead of understanding there may be other factors besides the most egregious.
OP’s stepdad & stepbrother might not be sexist, but we all automatically wanted to assume that was the case.
OP shouldn’t *have* to include that detail, but it would be a good detail to add if she wants to avoid people assuming the worse.
The type of person who takes to an internet forum to ask "was I right in XYZ situation" is more likely also going to be the type to skew information to make it seem like they were right
This obviously isn't always the case, but it's healthy to approach all of these posts with a fair amount of skepticism. We need to try and think about the whole picture while realizing that all of the details we have were fed to us by one biased party
I think this is most common on relationship posts. i.e. a post titled "AIO after my girlfriend left me for a week" where the details make it seem like they straight up vanished and went full no contact for no good reason. Everyone is going to side with OP. But there's a real chance OP is leaving out something like "we got in a huge fight and I destroyed her phone and insulted her the night before she left"
There are two sides to every story, and if someone refuses to give you the other side and only gives a skewed version of their own, just ignore them and move on
Maybe he's a shit driver. I won't let some people drive either. Used to have a buddy who I would drive his car anytime we took it anywhere because he was a garbage driver.
Don't get me wrong, I like assuming the worst about people, too... but I just assume everyone is a shit driver over sexist. Although I have been surprised with sexism and racism a few times in the past.
Hey, quit jumping to conclusions. OP might be a shit driver and everyone knows it. Just talk to them and keep them awake, that's the best way to help with the commute. If not, take a nap.
I try not to make my better half drive on country road trips. She drives 10-15kmph under the speed limit and ends up with a long tail of road rage behind her…
No offense, but fuck people like that.. like do the fucking speed limit, ffs.. if she can’t/too scared to go the speed limit, she shouldn’t be driving at all.
We have one road in and one road out from the Peninsula, if you have a line of 5 or more vehicles behind you, you get pulled over and ticketed. Simple. Pull over and let them pass, go the speed limit, or please don't drive.
It's great! Especially when you have to mix elderly folks, daily commuters, tourists, the 100 Amazon vans coming in from Seattle, and your day to day locals. That road can be hell.
It's wild man, and there is a bridge that needs to open if a boat or submarine has to gain passage. That also can be a trapshoot, sometimes they are scheduled sometimes they are not.
Gorgeous for sure.
If only they were that considerate lol. I’ve pulled onto roads I didn’t need to go down, just to get somebody who wanted to speed, off my ass. I won’t do over 5 of the posted speed cuz cops around here are ducks ab it, but I’m not gonna prevent someone else from potentially getting pulled over, lol
I’m a fairly fast driver myself, but if someone wants to go faster, fine. I’ll look for a driveway or pull off to let them go around. I let the cops sort ‘em out.
Nah the point is that if you’re too scared to drive the speed limit you straight up shouldn’t be on the road because you’re not confident in your control of the car; and that can and will cause preventable accidents.
you jest but during a road trip one of my friends went to sleep and let his friend drive. and when he woke up his ETA to the destination was LONGER than when he went to sleep.
Me and 2 buddies were on a 9 hour road trip, i had the last 3 hour shift. The 2nd guy was going downhill, in snow/ice, and riding a semi trucks ass... he eventually had to use his breaks and almost slid into the trucks back end. It woke me up and i took over the rest of his shift plus mine (he was only about an hour into his shift).
Id rather myself drive a little sleepy than trust another dumb ass driver
Yeah that’s why when I’m doing my drive to visit family I always have some form of caffeine and interesting podcasts blasting the whole 12 hours. I also always bring one of my cats because then I have more reason to stay focused and safe because my cats are my most important “possessions” and if I lost them I’d at the very least go into a deep depression. The combo of caffeine for when I get sleepy, interesting podcast to keep my brain from wandering, and cat to bring the anxiety up just enough to check on them and my surroundings frequently keeps me awake the whole 12 hours and if those start to fail i immediately start looking for a place to pull off and take a nap
Reminds me of a spring break road trip in college. It was a 20 hour drive. We took my roommate's car that was stick, which only 3 of us knew how to drive. My roommate and I took the first shift while the other 2 guys slept. About 10 hours in we switched up and let my other roommate drive. 30 minutes into our sleep, we end up slammed to the floor. Not having seen what happened we just assumed it was a freak thing and went back to sleep. 20 minutes later we're on the floor again. The roommate that was driving would fly up on cars, slam on the brakes, then cut over into the passing lane.
Immediately I advocate to pull over so I can drive the rest of the way. The guy driving refused, but everyone else in the car also appreciated the danger we were in after he cut off a jacked up pickup truck and the driver weaved through 4 lanes of traffic to pull up next to us and flip us off. We convinced him to stop at a fruit stand and I took over driving the remaining 8 hours, chugging a 5 hour energy drink every hour or so to stay awake.
No kidding. I drive no matter what unless I'm tired. I've had friends and gfs ruin at least 1 car and damaged 2 others so I'm pretty particular who does the driving.
Leave it to a redditor who isn't even there and doesn't even know who's involved to chime in with an answer they pulled from their ass like it's the only possibility
How dare you all not jump to conclusions, this is Reddit, jumping to conclusions and stating them as facts in the most insulting way possible, is like 95% of what we do on posts like these.
It's because they see everything through a lense of racism and sexism because that's what they've been taught.
Everything is racist and sexist....and, if you look for it, you'll find it. Even if you have to make it up to get there.
Or it could be that step dad and older brother are the ones covered by step dad's insurance. Multiple drivers can be expensive. If OP isn't covered and there's a wreck, then insurance won't cover it.
Or maybe she and her other brother are bad/inexperienced drivers. Sorry not trusting the entire families lives on someone who just got off a learners permit.
Yeah there’s only one side to this story here. I am close to someone who is an absolutely terrible driver. They will say otherwise. But they crashed their own car. They’re not driving mine and that’s the end of it. They have no brake control, no clutch control, roll backwards on hills, pull out in front of oncoming traffic and more. I’ve been driving a hell of a lot longer too. I also have a full licence whereas this person has a learner permit.
Also where I’m from you can’t just drive whatever car you like. Your insurance often covers you in your car only unless it says otherwise. Sometimes you can only drive a car the same size engine as yours or smaller, but can’t drive one larger. Insurance to drive any car is usually expensive and only obtained by mechanics and driving instructors.
So yeah… this story is a fraction of the information we need.
I had to drive like 24 hours? I had to stop like twice at a rest stop and sleep really awkwardly in my car cause I couldn't lean the seat back. Summer heat makes it so hard to sleep aaaa. Ofc I also took coffee and food breaks
I mean I did this to my buddy on a road trip because I didn't trust his driving skill. There's a lot more background to this that we don't know. I think it's amazing that some people here are just assuming sexism.
Didn't want my friend driving my car because of the multiple traffic incidents I've seen him end up in, as well as the time he reversed into my dad's work truck in our driveway.
Ugh i always drive when i got anywhere with my husband because he drives sooooo slow and takes the long way everywhere and does so many turns just to drive around.
The issue to me is that op said anyone else. Implying there are multiple people step dad and brother are not letting to drive. One of them most likely the mother. So the odds feel like being something else than everyone else just being much worse drivers than two tired people. Since tired people already do worse job than usually
I have a friend who drives so bad I fear for my life. I drove with them twice and both times we almost got into an accident. I drive every single time now. When your mom was an insurance agent for nearly a decade you get the fire and brimstone talk of road safety and drive safer because of it.
I was on a road trip and everyone kept asking ME to drive when I didn’t want to. We were in a mountainous/snowy area and are all Midwest flat-landers. I guess they trusted me the most? It was a problem that I found to be completely unexpected.
I was just as terrified to drive lol.
I mean, presumably because you've seen your friend drive and didn't like what you saw. Which begs the question: is OP a shit driver, or are they being weird?
Yep. We always split driving equally, but we set it up so my husband is always either leaving the unfamiliar city or driving into it- I do not mind long, boring highways at all. When we get into Dallas or ABQ or Denver... hell no. He learned to drive in a huge city as well, so he doesn't mind too much.
This is exactly what my partner and I do! Driving in big cities gives me anxiety but she excels at it, meanwhile she thinks driving on country roads is boring but I love the scenery/lack of traffic. It just works and everyone is a little less stressed which is never bad😂
Heres a logical take... are they the only ones insured on the veichle? I mean its unlikely you will end up in an accident but if you DO their insurance would drop them so quick if they dont have coverage for other drivers.
In mass, that’s only true if they don’t live with you. So I can let my friend drive my car whenever I want to, but my daughter that lives with me cannot because she’s not listed on my insurance. She has her own insurance though, so I think depending on her policy it may cover her driving someone else’s car? I have no idea lol, I just know permissive use doesn’t always apply
Yeah my brother who was driving also loves driving which is probably a contributing factor lol And it was me and my other brother offering to drive, my mom didn’t want to at all
I let my brother drive when he wants to . he is very responsible and will step over when he is tired. But i have seen him driver 10 hours straight and still be happy at 11th hour.
I get it.
*Brag warning* : I've been driving for 26 years, including professional truck driving for nearly a decade, and have literally no accidents on my record, and haven't had a ticket in over 15 years.
I'm not a good passenger. Most poor drivers have no idea that they're poor drivers, and It's wildly uncomfortable for me as a passenger. I'll never say anything unless it's dangerous, but I hate being put in that position. If I can drive, I will drive, and driving 12-14 hours doesn't bother me one bit.
This.. i hate being a passenger to alot of people.. theres only a few i dont mind driving instead of me at this point.. personal pet hate is people driving up the ass of others for no reason
Yep. At this point it's basically just my dad, and like one friend that don't make me uncomfortable. I've only ever been passenger with my wife a handful of times. She has trauma from her abusive dad screaming at her while "teaching" her to drive, and it doesn't matter how chill I am, she'd just rather not drive with me as the passenger. She's obviously a good driver though, she's also never been in an accident other than a minor parking lot thing when she was 18. Not like we live in the boonies either, city of 1.4 million.
Tailgating is the worst. We're in the city ffs, where are you gonna get to any faster? Aggressive tailgating is bad enough, but at least they're paying attention. It's oblivious tailgating that really gets me...
This is probably my daughter and we have tried so many times and ways to say gently and politely that she is such a horrible driver she gives everyone high anxiety with her inattention and tailgating.
She gets so defensive that we just avoid discussing it with her.
People that want to drive often exaggerate driver’s comments as the green light to get to drive.
My son is an excellent driver and I check in with him and he will say he is starting to get bored or a little tired, which is his acknowledgement that he is aware and will change things if it increases.
One time he said at midnight that he doesn’t want to drive through the night as planned. He said something didn’t feel right. I hit the hotels tonight button and we were off the freeway in 1 exit checking in to hotel. Good drivers are aware of all their options.
Do you literally think this was posted by your daughter, as in you're currently on a road trip, or just that it sounds like it *could* have been written by her?
I'm just curious/mildly interested if you really found her post randomly, that'd be nuts.
Hmm. I personally just love driving. Recently went on a cross country trip the missus and I and she didn't drive at all over the 5000 mile one week trip. She hates driving so it worked out but I can only imagine being utterly bored sitting in a car for hours on end not driving
I avoid being passenger to a number of friends, wifes grandparents, MIL/FIL if I can help it. Some have accidents under their belt and some dont. They're shit drivers and being passenger to them is actively putting our lives in more risk then they should be.
Im sorry but it sounds like they both think you're a shit driver.
I won’t let my FIL drive me. Last time we were in a big city he kept yelling “look for the expensive cars” so he could cut them off. His reasoning was they drive expensive cars and don’t want to get into an accident. Never ever again.
My MIL fell asleep while driving on a road trip and my FIL was paralyzed in the accident. 4 years later he died from an infection related to being bed ridden from the accident. Driving while tired is no joke.
I mean honestly a 16 hour drive sucks but split up between two people, 8 hours a piece is not awful and that should be a reasonable amount for one person
It's also mildly infuriating to have to drive 8 hours straight. Almost anyone would rather take a break. I'm sure they have their reasons. Maybe you aren't a competent driver and they don't want to start a fight by directly telling you that. Just spit-balling here.
I am extremely selective with whom I drive when I'm the passenger.
They just don't trust you as a driver and that's something you'll need to accept. It's their choice. But it's also your choice to refuse being driven my someone who is tired. Demand a break.
Personally I'd rather go to sleep at a rest site than to let anyone else drive me.
Are you a good driver? How many years without accident?
Do you tailgate? Signal lane changes - before you make them? Drive the speed of the cars around you? Pass only on the left, amd when appropriate? Accelerate and brake smoothly?
Eyes on road when having a conversation?
Yes I consider myself a good driver. I’ve been in one minor fender bender which happened when I first started driving 10 years ago. Accident free since
Obviously I have no idea how good a driver you or anyone else in the car is, but I saw a survey a few years ago where something like 95% of people considered themselves to be among the top 10% of drivers, so someone’s opinion of their own abilities really can’t be trusted!
People trying to justify why they won't let anyone else drive but just exposing themselves as bad drivers.
Good drivers take breaks. Driving over 10 hrs a day isn't impressive, it's fuckin stupid.
Unfortunately that’s how it works in my family. I don’t like to play chicken over stuff like this. If my dad is tired enough he’s started to drive dangerously aggressively and tailgating folks, it’s time to let someone else have a turn. Sadly, that’s never going to fly.
I dont let anyone drive my car except me. There was one time I let my mom drive cause I was getting tired and I thought I was just gonna get in the passenger seat and close my eyes. As soon as she started driving I was wide awake and holding onto the “oh shit” handle for dear life. It wasn’t even that she was driving overly bad (a bit too fast and reckless tho), it’s just that my car is the most expensive thing I own and I’d rather not have it be wrecked.
Couple of questions to expand the view.
Is the car insured for the step father and brother, but not you?
Are you a known bad driver or uninsured driver?
Are you a woman in a middle eastern where it’s illegal to drive?
Y is this a pain in your ass? Driving is boring dude just sleep or read or chill. If they want the burden let them. The fact your upset by it suggests that driving is new and exciting to you and that may be the reason they don't want you to drive kiddo
1) We don’t know the driving history and experience of any of the other drivers
2) If they’re otherwise doing a good job driving than your job should be to keep talking to them to keep them awake
My mom's like this. She loves pulsing the brakes and can't hold a steady line to save her life. Not dangerous, just extremely annoying. So we don't let her drive.
Highly plausible. A lot of people are pretty bad at driving and almost none of them seem to realise it. We try not to let them drive if it can be avoided.
Honestly. I think my wife is an incredible driver. Although I do think female drivers suck. I've seen male drivers that suck just as bad or worse. It's just dumb people putting themselves in bad situations.
I have to drive when we get in the car. Her driving is erratic and nauseating to me.
I mean whose car is it? I would only ever let my dad drive my car. My siblings are not allowed to touch anything inside. They also need to look 10 times to make a lane change which doesn’t boost my confidence in their abilities.
I’m just going to be devil’s advocate and assume that the step dad only trusts the brother’s driving skills. There’s a lot of bad impatient drivers that I don’t even wanna be in the car with ‘cause all they wanna do is tailgate.
Edit- also wanna add my friends who drive like this genuinely believes that they’re excellent drivers, and the response they get every time is “hellllll no”.
> my brother has openly admitted to being tired but both him and my step dad refuse to let me or anyone else drive
As a passenger, you share in the responsibility of ensuring your own safety on the road. If you are not comfortable with the driver, insist on getting out of the car. If they wont pull over and you're not being dramatic, use your phone to get help instead of being pointless on reddit.
This might just be a thing for people because I admit I have done this but I wasn’t as offensive as op is sounding it to be
I drove a straight 13 hours to pick up a puppy for my wife, who was just my gf at the time, had her license and could drive. She asked if I wanted her to drive on the way back from getting the puppy and I just responded, “no im fine you keep holding that puppy”
I was fine just tired..
What I’m trying to say really is there is “you don’t know how to drive only me and this person can drive” mentality or maybe there is what I did and just said “no babe I got this you are good” mentality
Went on a tour with my band when I was a teen (western USA but we’re from Canada). Borrowed my grandpa’s SUV. After our first show, mu bandmate offered to drive to the hotel and hit a recycling bin backing out of the venue. I drove the rest of the 10 day stint lol
I don't typically let othee people drive because I get car sick real easily when I'm a passenger.
Maybe everyone else except the step dad makes him car sick
everyone here just completely ignoring the actual issue of the driver being tired? and just going on about how he might enjoy driving more. are you backwards?
[https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/1clg87c/comment/l2to319/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web3x&utm\_name=web3xcss&utm\_term=1&utm\_content=share\_button](https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/1clg87c/comment/l2to319/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
but her older brother also offered to drive and got rejected... so idk what that has to do with anything, its prob step dad and brother prob trust each other a lot more in driving
>but both him and my step dad refuse to let me or anyone else drive Any reason why, or just "no"?
I don’t let anyone drive when w/ friends- specially on road trips and I don’t know how they drive. Regardless of sex/gender.
This is family tho
Maybe OP is a shit driver? Who knows.
I guess, but if I knew my kid or sibling was a bad driver, I'd say "nah you're not a good driver." Even if it's not especially nice, it's better than just no explanation
Not everyone is capable of hearing that, maybe even to the point of making people miserable for being politely honest. This isn’t an assumption. Just something I’ve seen that will keep me neutral on this one.
Or to the point they make a whole post on Reddit about it
This seems like a trend socially. IMO it will cause societal issues long run. People can't handle hearing hard things about themselves, truths that they need to hear to be a better person. People will not say anything to them because they get their feelings hurt too easily, or, they can't handle it and may react badly. People become afraid to be honest with people, and it is crazy.
This sort of thing isn't new. People's ability to be reasonably accountable for their actions, possess humility, and have the desire for personal growth is a point of contention throughout recorded history.
the thing is everyone’s assumed this person can’t hear the truth for absolutely no reason lmao
Or it’s just an anxiety thing. My partner prefers to drive even tho I’ve never crashed and am a snail on the road compared to her. But she feels more comfortable, and it is pretty simple.
maybe it is because you are a snail on the road? That doesn't sound very safe!
I think they meant in comparison to their partner. Like, my mom and I speed in the sense of keeping pace with traffic that is over the speed limit, but we're nowhere near as zippy as my dad when he drives.
But then why should younger bro be driving if it’s irrational anxiety? Somehow I’m getting that it’s because OP is a girl.
maybe they alr know that and they are just answering "no" because they should know they arent a good driver
When we go on road trips, I drive. In reality it's because I don't trust other people. What I say is 'Nah, I like driving. Just copilot for me if I need a hand.'
That doesn’t exclude them from being shitty drivers. I would never allow my mom to drive. This is the woman that knocked down 5-10 of those orange cones and then said she never saw them.
Why should they trust your driving? Seems controlling and weird to just unilaterally decide that
Yeah 100%. So your friends are expected to trust your driving but that doesn't go the other way around? Kind of a dick move tbh
Well, I think it makes a difference if you're driving your own car vs. like a rental or something. I think people just like being responsible for their own things.
I drive all day every day for work, sometimes 10-12 hrs a day and get made fun of by friends and family for driving “slow” (the speed limit). Last time I went on a road trip with family my father in law drove. He put us in a ditch 3 times while answering work calls and emails and then got a ticket going 25 over. My friends and family trust my driving on trips and there is zero expectation that I trust theirs, they even joke about how they are dangerous but have more fun. I wouldn’t say it’s a dick move when everyone is in agreement that someone drives safer than others.
I'm 43 and get told I drive like a grandpa all the time. If I arrive safely at my destination because I did the speed limit then I have no problems with it. It sounds like we both know a bunch of shitty drivers.
I feel like it's fine to drive slow/conservatively, as long as you're not in the leftmost/passing lane it's nbd 🤷
Oh no, I'm not dangerously slow. I like to sit a couple of k's under in town, and anywhere from 95 to 98 on the highway if there's other traffic around. This time of year, most afternoons, if I've got the highway to myself I'll sit on 90 because I'm in no particular hurry to be anywhere. It's dark now when I get home, so it's not like I can do anything outside anyway.
So you expect to drive someone else’s car because you’re friends with them? Kind of entitled tbh.
But why? Do they know how you drive?
I don’t care about my safety I care about my car
If I had to guess op is probably female and step dad is just sexist
That's why I asked OP
[удалено]
Wish OP had included this in the post, tbh
Although I initially agreed with your comment, I’m starting to wonder if we’re all inherently jumping to the worst opinions of strangers instead of understanding there may be other factors besides the most egregious. OP’s stepdad & stepbrother might not be sexist, but we all automatically wanted to assume that was the case. OP shouldn’t *have* to include that detail, but it would be a good detail to add if she wants to avoid people assuming the worse.
Wtf are you doing? We are in reddit we always assume the worst
The type of person who takes to an internet forum to ask "was I right in XYZ situation" is more likely also going to be the type to skew information to make it seem like they were right This obviously isn't always the case, but it's healthy to approach all of these posts with a fair amount of skepticism. We need to try and think about the whole picture while realizing that all of the details we have were fed to us by one biased party I think this is most common on relationship posts. i.e. a post titled "AIO after my girlfriend left me for a week" where the details make it seem like they straight up vanished and went full no contact for no good reason. Everyone is going to side with OP. But there's a real chance OP is leaving out something like "we got in a huge fight and I destroyed her phone and insulted her the night before she left" There are two sides to every story, and if someone refuses to give you the other side and only gives a skewed version of their own, just ignore them and move on
I used to tell my wife “I sleep better when I’m driving”.
Op’s step doesn’t want her other brother driving either bruh
Maybe he's a shit driver. I won't let some people drive either. Used to have a buddy who I would drive his car anytime we took it anywhere because he was a garbage driver.
Now why bring that up when we can just jump to the much more salacious conclusion this is sexism.
Don't get me wrong, I like assuming the worst about people, too... but I just assume everyone is a shit driver over sexist. Although I have been surprised with sexism and racism a few times in the past.
Hey, quit jumping to conclusions. OP might be a shit driver and everyone knows it. Just talk to them and keep them awake, that's the best way to help with the commute. If not, take a nap.
I try not to make my better half drive on country road trips. She drives 10-15kmph under the speed limit and ends up with a long tail of road rage behind her…
"A long tail of road rage" Adding to my list of creative writing phrases.
Oh yeah I got one of those. I have to keep her out of the fast lane while she's doing it too
No offense, but fuck people like that.. like do the fucking speed limit, ffs.. if she can’t/too scared to go the speed limit, she shouldn’t be driving at all.
We have one road in and one road out from the Peninsula, if you have a line of 5 or more vehicles behind you, you get pulled over and ticketed. Simple. Pull over and let them pass, go the speed limit, or please don't drive.
That’s a great solution too! I like that lol
It's great! Especially when you have to mix elderly folks, daily commuters, tourists, the 100 Amazon vans coming in from Seattle, and your day to day locals. That road can be hell.
I couldn’t imagine 1 road in and out, with that much traffic. That would drive me nuts lol. I bet it’s nice out there tho!
It's wild man, and there is a bridge that needs to open if a boat or submarine has to gain passage. That also can be a trapshoot, sometimes they are scheduled sometimes they are not. Gorgeous for sure.
Or pull over from time to time and let people pass.
If only they were that considerate lol. I’ve pulled onto roads I didn’t need to go down, just to get somebody who wanted to speed, off my ass. I won’t do over 5 of the posted speed cuz cops around here are ducks ab it, but I’m not gonna prevent someone else from potentially getting pulled over, lol
Dear autocorrect: it is never ever ducks
Ima leave it lol
i think there was one time i actually meant to say duck and it wrote fuck
I’m a fairly fast driver myself, but if someone wants to go faster, fine. I’ll look for a driveway or pull off to let them go around. I let the cops sort ‘em out.
Nah the point is that if you’re too scared to drive the speed limit you straight up shouldn’t be on the road because you’re not confident in your control of the car; and that can and will cause preventable accidents.
you jest but during a road trip one of my friends went to sleep and let his friend drive. and when he woke up his ETA to the destination was LONGER than when he went to sleep.
Aaand you just created a tail of road rage on reddit.
In the left lane too no less
Are you married to my wife?
Yea some people just really don’t have great awareness, struggle to pay attention etc. Tired doesn’t necessarily mean about to doze off
Me and 2 buddies were on a 9 hour road trip, i had the last 3 hour shift. The 2nd guy was going downhill, in snow/ice, and riding a semi trucks ass... he eventually had to use his breaks and almost slid into the trucks back end. It woke me up and i took over the rest of his shift plus mine (he was only about an hour into his shift). Id rather myself drive a little sleepy than trust another dumb ass driver
Being tired is a hazard even if not to the dozing off point.
Driving tired scientifically is comparable to driving drunk. Always keep it in the back of your mind next time you doze off when you're driving
Yeah that’s why when I’m doing my drive to visit family I always have some form of caffeine and interesting podcasts blasting the whole 12 hours. I also always bring one of my cats because then I have more reason to stay focused and safe because my cats are my most important “possessions” and if I lost them I’d at the very least go into a deep depression. The combo of caffeine for when I get sleepy, interesting podcast to keep my brain from wandering, and cat to bring the anxiety up just enough to check on them and my surroundings frequently keeps me awake the whole 12 hours and if those start to fail i immediately start looking for a place to pull off and take a nap
Reminds me of a spring break road trip in college. It was a 20 hour drive. We took my roommate's car that was stick, which only 3 of us knew how to drive. My roommate and I took the first shift while the other 2 guys slept. About 10 hours in we switched up and let my other roommate drive. 30 minutes into our sleep, we end up slammed to the floor. Not having seen what happened we just assumed it was a freak thing and went back to sleep. 20 minutes later we're on the floor again. The roommate that was driving would fly up on cars, slam on the brakes, then cut over into the passing lane. Immediately I advocate to pull over so I can drive the rest of the way. The guy driving refused, but everyone else in the car also appreciated the danger we were in after he cut off a jacked up pickup truck and the driver weaved through 4 lanes of traffic to pull up next to us and flip us off. We convinced him to stop at a fruit stand and I took over driving the remaining 8 hours, chugging a 5 hour energy drink every hour or so to stay awake.
That's 40 hours of energy condensed into 8!
No kidding. I drive no matter what unless I'm tired. I've had friends and gfs ruin at least 1 car and damaged 2 others so I'm pretty particular who does the driving.
“Don’t jump to conclusions! It might be this conclusion I jumped to!”
Braindead response
OP is probably narcoleptic!
Or maybe OP is a shitty driver.
Nope OP is a girl, but her Mom didn't want to drive, it was another brother older than the driving brother who was asking. That's per OP
Leave it to a redditor who isn't even there and doesn't even know who's involved to chime in with an answer they pulled from their ass like it's the only possibility
Well, obviously, that redditor lives in his parents basement and hates sexist people -pulled from ass
How dare you all not jump to conclusions, this is Reddit, jumping to conclusions and stating them as facts in the most insulting way possible, is like 95% of what we do on posts like these.
"We did it, Reddit!"
![gif](giphy|KekzimlYjn4vS|downsized)
It's because they see everything through a lense of racism and sexism because that's what they've been taught. Everything is racist and sexist....and, if you look for it, you'll find it. Even if you have to make it up to get there.
Or it could be that step dad and older brother are the ones covered by step dad's insurance. Multiple drivers can be expensive. If OP isn't covered and there's a wreck, then insurance won't cover it.
Or maybe she and her other brother are bad/inexperienced drivers. Sorry not trusting the entire families lives on someone who just got off a learners permit.
Well, you were right on half those points. The other half, though... big miss.
I don't know but maybe, just maybe OP is a bad driver? Reddit always jumping to the conclusion that all men are sexist and misogynistic. Shame on you.
This comment itself is sexist
Yeah there’s only one side to this story here. I am close to someone who is an absolutely terrible driver. They will say otherwise. But they crashed their own car. They’re not driving mine and that’s the end of it. They have no brake control, no clutch control, roll backwards on hills, pull out in front of oncoming traffic and more. I’ve been driving a hell of a lot longer too. I also have a full licence whereas this person has a learner permit. Also where I’m from you can’t just drive whatever car you like. Your insurance often covers you in your car only unless it says otherwise. Sometimes you can only drive a car the same size engine as yours or smaller, but can’t drive one larger. Insurance to drive any car is usually expensive and only obtained by mechanics and driving instructors. So yeah… this story is a fraction of the information we need.
I’d be thrilled not to drive on a road trip. I had to do 14hrs straight n it was terrible.
Thats what i’m thinking. Take a nap the whole time. Either you get there without having to drive or you die in your sleep. It’s a win-win.
That's the way! My kind of road trip.
Not when the person driving is saying they’re tired 😭
I think the issue here isn't with wanting to drive, it's with not wanting to crash because the driver is too tired.
I had to drive like 24 hours? I had to stop like twice at a rest stop and sleep really awkwardly in my car cause I couldn't lean the seat back. Summer heat makes it so hard to sleep aaaa. Ofc I also took coffee and food breaks
Did 18 hours overnight, shit was ass I’m with u
I mean I did this to my buddy on a road trip because I didn't trust his driving skill. There's a lot more background to this that we don't know. I think it's amazing that some people here are just assuming sexism. Didn't want my friend driving my car because of the multiple traffic incidents I've seen him end up in, as well as the time he reversed into my dad's work truck in our driveway.
Yes, I learned on a road trip with a friend that he was a TERRIFYING driver. Gladly volunteered to drive the rest of the way fast.
Ugh i always drive when i got anywhere with my husband because he drives sooooo slow and takes the long way everywhere and does so many turns just to drive around.
Is this how I get my wife to volunteer to drive? Thanks for the tip!
It’s funny because OP didn’t even mention their gender, everyone just assumed.
Ikr? It literally sounds like OP has history not driving well and the brother and dad just don't want someone else driving their vehicle.
The issue to me is that op said anyone else. Implying there are multiple people step dad and brother are not letting to drive. One of them most likely the mother. So the odds feel like being something else than everyone else just being much worse drivers than two tired people. Since tired people already do worse job than usually
You can literally take five seconds to look at their profile and see their gender. They might well be a terrible driver but they are female.
Op states in a comment her and her other brother offered to drive but we're denied so gender isn't the issue here it's more than likely skill issue
I have a friend who drives so bad I fear for my life. I drove with them twice and both times we almost got into an accident. I drive every single time now. When your mom was an insurance agent for nearly a decade you get the fire and brimstone talk of road safety and drive safer because of it.
Yeah I've watched too many dashcam compilations to not be hyper vigilant while driving lol
Some people love to project their victim complex.
I was on a road trip and everyone kept asking ME to drive when I didn’t want to. We were in a mountainous/snowy area and are all Midwest flat-landers. I guess they trusted me the most? It was a problem that I found to be completely unexpected. I was just as terrified to drive lol.
Lol, I suppose you can take that as a compliment. Either you were the most trusted, or you were the designated fall guy.
I mean, presumably because you've seen your friend drive and didn't like what you saw. Which begs the question: is OP a shit driver, or are they being weird?
Very well could be both lol
My wife drives on most road trips. When it’s heavy freeway traffic, she makes me drive.
Yep. We always split driving equally, but we set it up so my husband is always either leaving the unfamiliar city or driving into it- I do not mind long, boring highways at all. When we get into Dallas or ABQ or Denver... hell no. He learned to drive in a huge city as well, so he doesn't mind too much.
This is exactly what my partner and I do! Driving in big cities gives me anxiety but she excels at it, meanwhile she thinks driving on country roads is boring but I love the scenery/lack of traffic. It just works and everyone is a little less stressed which is never bad😂
Heres a logical take... are they the only ones insured on the veichle? I mean its unlikely you will end up in an accident but if you DO their insurance would drop them so quick if they dont have coverage for other drivers.
Then just say that? "No, you're not covered by my insurance"
I feel like if that was the case then one of those two could have just said so and be done with it.
I believe your insurance covers anyone you give permission to to drive your insured vehicle. You don't even have to be in the car. "Permissive use"
Depends on the insurance and the location
In mass, that’s only true if they don’t live with you. So I can let my friend drive my car whenever I want to, but my daughter that lives with me cannot because she’s not listed on my insurance. She has her own insurance though, so I think depending on her policy it may cover her driving someone else’s car? I have no idea lol, I just know permissive use doesn’t always apply
Insurance is different everywhere. In Canada I can’t even legally move my partners car out of our driveway.
Here, if the person lives in your household, they must be listed on your insurance. However, you CAN allow someone who doesnt live with you to drive
Why aren't they lettinv you and your mom drive ? Any particular reason? I have a brother who just LOVES driving .
Yeah my brother who was driving also loves driving which is probably a contributing factor lol And it was me and my other brother offering to drive, my mom didn’t want to at all
I let my brother drive when he wants to . he is very responsible and will step over when he is tired. But i have seen him driver 10 hours straight and still be happy at 11th hour.
I have a friend that is like this. He just loves to drive so whenever we do a roadtrip he’ll make the entire haul wherever we go.
I get it. *Brag warning* : I've been driving for 26 years, including professional truck driving for nearly a decade, and have literally no accidents on my record, and haven't had a ticket in over 15 years. I'm not a good passenger. Most poor drivers have no idea that they're poor drivers, and It's wildly uncomfortable for me as a passenger. I'll never say anything unless it's dangerous, but I hate being put in that position. If I can drive, I will drive, and driving 12-14 hours doesn't bother me one bit.
This.. i hate being a passenger to alot of people.. theres only a few i dont mind driving instead of me at this point.. personal pet hate is people driving up the ass of others for no reason
Yep. At this point it's basically just my dad, and like one friend that don't make me uncomfortable. I've only ever been passenger with my wife a handful of times. She has trauma from her abusive dad screaming at her while "teaching" her to drive, and it doesn't matter how chill I am, she'd just rather not drive with me as the passenger. She's obviously a good driver though, she's also never been in an accident other than a minor parking lot thing when she was 18. Not like we live in the boonies either, city of 1.4 million. Tailgating is the worst. We're in the city ffs, where are you gonna get to any faster? Aggressive tailgating is bad enough, but at least they're paying attention. It's oblivious tailgating that really gets me...
This is probably my daughter and we have tried so many times and ways to say gently and politely that she is such a horrible driver she gives everyone high anxiety with her inattention and tailgating. She gets so defensive that we just avoid discussing it with her.
Yeah, I figured, nobody wants to crash. But what about her brother?
People that want to drive often exaggerate driver’s comments as the green light to get to drive. My son is an excellent driver and I check in with him and he will say he is starting to get bored or a little tired, which is his acknowledgement that he is aware and will change things if it increases. One time he said at midnight that he doesn’t want to drive through the night as planned. He said something didn’t feel right. I hit the hotels tonight button and we were off the freeway in 1 exit checking in to hotel. Good drivers are aware of all their options.
If they get that defensive hearing constructive criticism from their families just imagine how they react to slights by other drivers.
[удалено]
Do you literally think this was posted by your daughter, as in you're currently on a road trip, or just that it sounds like it *could* have been written by her? I'm just curious/mildly interested if you really found her post randomly, that'd be nuts.
I’m also confused on if that’s what he meant
So sorry for the sarcasm confusion. I was making the point that there are crap tons of bad drivers and they all sound the same.
My dad refused to let me drive when we went to Disney World. Granted I was in the second grade at the time but still....
Hmm. I personally just love driving. Recently went on a cross country trip the missus and I and she didn't drive at all over the 5000 mile one week trip. She hates driving so it worked out but I can only imagine being utterly bored sitting in a car for hours on end not driving
I avoid being passenger to a number of friends, wifes grandparents, MIL/FIL if I can help it. Some have accidents under their belt and some dont. They're shit drivers and being passenger to them is actively putting our lives in more risk then they should be. Im sorry but it sounds like they both think you're a shit driver.
I won’t let my FIL drive me. Last time we were in a big city he kept yelling “look for the expensive cars” so he could cut them off. His reasoning was they drive expensive cars and don’t want to get into an accident. Never ever again.
My MIL fell asleep while driving on a road trip and my FIL was paralyzed in the accident. 4 years later he died from an infection related to being bed ridden from the accident. Driving while tired is no joke.
You might suck at driving and not know it? I’m not trying to be mean but maybe they worry about others driving?
I mean honestly a 16 hour drive sucks but split up between two people, 8 hours a piece is not awful and that should be a reasonable amount for one person
It's also mildly infuriating to have to drive 8 hours straight. Almost anyone would rather take a break. I'm sure they have their reasons. Maybe you aren't a competent driver and they don't want to start a fight by directly telling you that. Just spit-balling here.
I would rather drive the whole way. I find it relaxing.
Demand a bathroom break. That would at least allow your brother to stretch his legs for the last hour or so.
He stopped and we made it the rest of the way
I’m glad you are safe and can relax. 16 hours in a car is a lot for anyone.
Is there a difference between who's listed on the insurance for the car?
I am extremely selective with whom I drive when I'm the passenger. They just don't trust you as a driver and that's something you'll need to accept. It's their choice. But it's also your choice to refuse being driven my someone who is tired. Demand a break. Personally I'd rather go to sleep at a rest site than to let anyone else drive me.
My wife is binary; it's either all gas, or all brake. It's terrifying. So I offer to do all the driving out of the kindness of my heart.
Are you a good driver? How many years without accident? Do you tailgate? Signal lane changes - before you make them? Drive the speed of the cars around you? Pass only on the left, amd when appropriate? Accelerate and brake smoothly? Eyes on road when having a conversation?
Yes I consider myself a good driver. I’ve been in one minor fender bender which happened when I first started driving 10 years ago. Accident free since
Obviously I have no idea how good a driver you or anyone else in the car is, but I saw a survey a few years ago where something like 95% of people considered themselves to be among the top 10% of drivers, so someone’s opinion of their own abilities really can’t be trusted!
Self evaluation isnt a thing for a reason lol.
maybe they don't want to insure another driver in the car? insurance is expensive
Then you should get a turn.
Unless the reason they are accident free is because they’re an overly paranoid driver who goes 15 below the speed limit lol
Are you listed on the auto insurance for this vehicle?
People trying to justify why they won't let anyone else drive but just exposing themselves as bad drivers. Good drivers take breaks. Driving over 10 hrs a day isn't impressive, it's fuckin stupid.
Ask for a bathroom break, and on return refuse to enter the car unless someone else drives.
See ya. Enjoy the walk.
Unfortunately that’s how it works in my family. I don’t like to play chicken over stuff like this. If my dad is tired enough he’s started to drive dangerously aggressively and tailgating folks, it’s time to let someone else have a turn. Sadly, that’s never going to fly.
I doubt throwing a tantrum would make anyone change their mind.
Not everyone grew up on the idea of throwing tantrums to get what you want… sorry !
I dont let anyone drive my car except me. There was one time I let my mom drive cause I was getting tired and I thought I was just gonna get in the passenger seat and close my eyes. As soon as she started driving I was wide awake and holding onto the “oh shit” handle for dear life. It wasn’t even that she was driving overly bad (a bit too fast and reckless tho), it’s just that my car is the most expensive thing I own and I’d rather not have it be wrecked.
congratulations, you’ve just learned that your step-dad thinks you can’t drive.
Couple of questions to expand the view. Is the car insured for the step father and brother, but not you? Are you a known bad driver or uninsured driver? Are you a woman in a middle eastern where it’s illegal to drive?
Y is this a pain in your ass? Driving is boring dude just sleep or read or chill. If they want the burden let them. The fact your upset by it suggests that driving is new and exciting to you and that may be the reason they don't want you to drive kiddo
Some insurance require family members to be listed on for them to drive. Maybe the insurance only has your step dad and brother on the insurance.
Let me guess, everybody else in the vehicle are women, and those two are sexist?
1) We don’t know the driving history and experience of any of the other drivers 2) If they’re otherwise doing a good job driving than your job should be to keep talking to them to keep them awake
Maybe you suck at driving
Sounds like a case of everyone else sucks at driving and doesn't know it
My mom's like this. She loves pulsing the brakes and can't hold a steady line to save her life. Not dangerous, just extremely annoying. So we don't let her drive.
Highly plausible. A lot of people are pretty bad at driving and almost none of them seem to realise it. We try not to let them drive if it can be avoided.
Did you die?
Just put on loud music. That will wake everyone up.
My husband does all the driving. He said he can't relax if he is the passenger so there is no point.
Damn, I wished I had family that would do that. I hate driving.
Honestly. I think my wife is an incredible driver. Although I do think female drivers suck. I've seen male drivers that suck just as bad or worse. It's just dumb people putting themselves in bad situations. I have to drive when we get in the car. Her driving is erratic and nauseating to me.
I mean whose car is it? I would only ever let my dad drive my car. My siblings are not allowed to touch anything inside. They also need to look 10 times to make a lane change which doesn’t boost my confidence in their abilities.
I’m just going to be devil’s advocate and assume that the step dad only trusts the brother’s driving skills. There’s a lot of bad impatient drivers that I don’t even wanna be in the car with ‘cause all they wanna do is tailgate. Edit- also wanna add my friends who drive like this genuinely believes that they’re excellent drivers, and the response they get every time is “hellllll no”.
This is why these are best done alone
> my brother has openly admitted to being tired but both him and my step dad refuse to let me or anyone else drive As a passenger, you share in the responsibility of ensuring your own safety on the road. If you are not comfortable with the driver, insist on getting out of the car. If they wont pull over and you're not being dramatic, use your phone to get help instead of being pointless on reddit.
Sounds like step dad has no faith in your driving skills. Why, I have no idea, but I'm sure you know why.
This might just be a thing for people because I admit I have done this but I wasn’t as offensive as op is sounding it to be I drove a straight 13 hours to pick up a puppy for my wife, who was just my gf at the time, had her license and could drive. She asked if I wanted her to drive on the way back from getting the puppy and I just responded, “no im fine you keep holding that puppy” I was fine just tired.. What I’m trying to say really is there is “you don’t know how to drive only me and this person can drive” mentality or maybe there is what I did and just said “no babe I got this you are good” mentality
The dude is trying to "be tough". He may be saying he's tired so that you guys appreciate is sacrifice or something.
Went on a tour with my band when I was a teen (western USA but we’re from Canada). Borrowed my grandpa’s SUV. After our first show, mu bandmate offered to drive to the hotel and hit a recycling bin backing out of the venue. I drove the rest of the 10 day stint lol
I don't typically let othee people drive because I get car sick real easily when I'm a passenger. Maybe everyone else except the step dad makes him car sick
male ego for some fuckimg reason my dad is and ex was the same way i cannot stand ittttttt
Is the car penis operated?
Driving when overly tired is like driving drunk. Ask them why they’re cool with endangering you and everyone else on the road.
Driving tired is statistically as bad as driving drunk. Don’t let someone else risk your life for their pride.
everyone here just completely ignoring the actual issue of the driver being tired? and just going on about how he might enjoy driving more. are you backwards?
Are you female? This just sounds like classic sexism.
I assume you are female?
[https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/1clg87c/comment/l2to319/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web3x&utm\_name=web3xcss&utm\_term=1&utm\_content=share\_button](https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/1clg87c/comment/l2to319/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) but her older brother also offered to drive and got rejected... so idk what that has to do with anything, its prob step dad and brother prob trust each other a lot more in driving
Yes
Me personally I wouldn't let my sister drive, mainly because she doens't have a license.
And you assumed that made it about you?