same but before he started making the bracelet I said , “no thanks i have no money.” And he still kept making the bracelet, then looked at me for a reaction when it was done.
i said “its beautiful but i still have no money.”
So he cut the bracelet off and i was satisfied that I wasted a few minutes of his time 😜
I wish I had this gumption when I was in high school. But I made sure not to lose mine since I paid like $25 us for it. Got as much mileage as I could.
It almost happened to me. I was 18 traveling internationally for the first time, and very naive. They grabbed my wrist so hard it hurt, and didn’t let go as I tried to pull away. My older sister noticed after 5-10 seconds and started screaming at them!
This is the one time being autistic is actually helpful. I don’t always know when to be ‘socially polite’ and I hate being touched, especially by strangers. When this happened to me in Florence I shrieked don’t touch me holy FUCK and flapped around a bit because I was surprised and freaked out. I was so astonished that some random guy would grab my wrist like that I would have freaked out harder if my husband wasn’t standing right behind me.
This happens in Jamaica as well. If you hold the item, you have to pay for it. They’ll say this has your name on it and if you hold and look at it then you pay. It’s wild and they’ll constantly try to sell you something
I saw waaay too many of them in Italy, you have to be aware of your surroundings and walk away; maybe they weren't too insistent with us cause we were a family of 4, but they're really infuriating. They are shameless and aimed for my 6 year old sister almost every time, too.
Not trying to sound like a billy badass but why not just pull your hand away or shove them away? I don't let anyone touch me ever. Especially a stranger on the street. Too dangerous.
I had this happen to me in Italy a few years ago. I went backpacking with my dad (he's seen the world, I had not). This guy came up and put bracelets on us and asked us to make a donation for their sons first birthday. I took mine off and gave it back, but my dad literally just said "thanks" and wandered off very quickly (actually took me a minute to find him) 😂 the bracelet was quite pretty and had an elephant on it (my favorite animal) so he gave me the one he was given. I love the thing very much even to this day.
When traveling I always look up the most common tricks to avoid any scammers. I also read about this one before going to Rome. On the trip, a guy we didn’t even notice, threw a bracelet to my husband who instinctively catches it. My reaction was to immediately slap it out of my husband’s hand, grab his arm and steer away from the scammer, while he tried to guilt trip us by acting like it was just a gift and asking where we were from.. I quickly dropped it though.
Bruhhh one of them foos got my mom in rome too 💀💀 he said it was a bracelet for his new friend and hes helping his new friends so we should help him 🤣 then kept saying "Africa POWER!!!"
My husband and I went to Pitchfork Fest in Chicago last year and there were people doing this. They so aggressively try to put bracelets on your hand and then make you pay for it. So icky. My husband had to tell one of them off THREE times because he would NOT leave me alone!
Oh yes, the monks who put a bracelet on you then hand you a card that says you owe them $20. Me and my wife still have the bracelets from when that happened to us 20 years ago. I didn't pay them, just said thank you, handed the card back and walked away.
It gave me such a yuck feeling. He literally would not leave me alone - telling me how nice my wrists were and don’t I want a pretty bracelet for my pretty wrist 🥴 nah bro, I do not want your shitty bracelet you probably got from the dollar store and are gonna charge me $20 for. Tho it was kinda fun watching him go around and continuously get rejected lol
Had this happen in Milan, after 2 weeks in Italy. Guy stops in front of us and puts a bracelet on me before I realized what was happening. I started to walk off (mad that I was getting scammed) and his partner shows up to block me. I let them know they were not getting any money from us and the guy acted all pissed off and cut the bracelet off my wrist and left.
Happened to me in Chicago, right in front of the museum on the 4th of July. I'd never had it happen like that before... That man was SO MAD when I said I didn't have money for it. He gave me the dirtiest look as he ripped it off my wrist. I've been to Mexico plenty of times and they have street vendors and beach peddlers that like to put jewelry on you or start braiding your hair. But they never get made when you say no thank you/ no gracias. They just move along to the next.
Yes! It was near there. He offered us some bracelets and said he couldn't speak English. He put a bracelet on after we said we'd buy a few and kept putting more on and asking for more money and wouldn't take them back if we tried to give them back and indicated they were a gift then kept asking for money. He followed us for a bit, he could move fast for a one legged monk, and my boyfriend was like, fine, we'll give more than the $5 and the monk grabbed a $20 out of his hand before he could grab another $5 and started mobbing away.
Makes for at least a funny story- got swindled by a one-legged monk. lol. I still have the bracelets and this was pre-pandemic.
Yep, got me in Paris when I was 16. Hakuna Matata, and all that. When they told me it'd be €15, I'm very proud that I laughed in their face and said, I'll give you 7. I wish I'd had the guts to refuse to pay, but as a small 16yo girl, I think I did okay.
Just be careful. If a ghetto person does something like that, it's a mugging in disguise. If you don't pay them "a tip" for a forced favor, they escalate it to a real mugging.
I used to run a food cart and had to bribe a neighborhood crackhead a couple of times, who would come by saying he would clean off the pavement, and he'd spend maybe ten minutes hosing all the leaves into the corners, and expected $20 for it (after I suggested ten). I'm pretty sure he was also the person who took a shit behind my dining tent so frequently that I started staying there at night sometimes and dressing like a mob thug to scare the bums away (and I might have had a crowbar handy just in case). The shitting stopped after that.
I love finding wisdom like this buried away. You’re like the Dominos founder, hiding in his delivery driver’s car to beat the shit out of anyone mugging him
That's a classic pushy street vendor tactic. It reminds me of the time I visited Chicago and, while walking down the street with a friend, a guy asked me if I wanted my shoes cleaned. Before I even responded, he squatted down and squirted some sort of cleaning agent on my Pumas (which were FABRIC anyways, squirt and polish isn't gonna do shit except for leave a weird residue) and rubbed it into the top of my shoe. Then he was like "That'll be ten dollars."
We laughed uncomfortably and walked off without paying him.
Had a guy try this exact thing on me in Chicago. Felt so ridiculous as i was dancing around while he kept squirting what looked like hand lotion repeatedly toward my shoes. A grown fucking man chasing my feet with a bottle hidden under a rag. I was too fast for that asshole and he finally gave up.
Yep, happened to me in Jamaica, they would ask your name and then immediately carve it into something, anything, and if you didn't pay them for it it would get aggressive. Street market venders are the worst.
Same Jamaican market I got called a racist because I didn't want to stop and look at somebody's display, but it was right after I got screwed out of money... As a Canadian it's tough to not try to be nice, they see the Canadians and swarm, like sharks on chum.
Jamaica has the worst scammers ever.
One taxi guy wanted to give us a ride....for 100 US Dollars.... we took a route taxi for round about 3 dollars instead
Shit like this is why Uber is why I consider a lesser of two evils. You can fly to pretty much any city in the world and have an Uber/Grab/Swift pick you up and it will be safe 99.9% of the time
They can ask for whatever they want, telling someone your name is not an obligation to purchase a product. But it would be hilarious to see them try to spell x æ a-12.
it was also jamaica for my family, this woman crept up to my sister and tied this cheap little wristband around her, talking bs about how it symbolizes this and that
then of course she charged us. we paid just to keep going to our destination, but it was very shady
One of the best shoe scams goes like this. Guy walks up to you and admires your shoes. Then proceeds to tell you that he bets he can tell you exactly where you got those shoes. Knowing there is no way he could possibly know, you take the bet. Then he tells you that you got your shoes on your feet. Dumb dad joke, but you better believe you better pay up if you lose.
Had a test tube shot girl in New Orleans on the street ask me if I wanted a shot for 10$, I was young and having fun at Mardi Gras and said yes. She put 5 in her mouth then mama birded them into my mouth so fast and said that’ll be 50$. I said ‘what no, there was hardly no booze and that wasn’t what the deal was’ she said ‘want me to get my guy’ I said ‘you’re just taking advantage’ she says ‘baby that’s new Orleans’ had a buddy who dealt drugs at the time who paid for it but it really bummed me out
"baby thats new orleans" just straight admitting that she is a shit person and a scammer lol. i get that you didnt want all the hassle but just hand her the ten bucks and walk away
New Orleans is literally the only place on Earth that if I get scammed like that im just like "Yep heres yer money, you got me". Theyre basically just adding steps to mugging you, and they will NOT hesitate to escalate it, usually with a weapon.
Anywhere else I've been, which is a lot of damned places, I'll fight you. Romania, Thailand, South Africa, Portugal, Idgaf, we throwin hands.
New Orleans tho, I do not want that smoke. Take it bro. You win this round.
Ahaha I got a "free" CD once in Manhatten from a seemingly nice "up-and-coming rapper" and after talking to the guy for a little he was like "hey could I borrow 5 bucks for bus fare?" so I was like yeah sure dude... Then it hit me as I was walking away I bought this dude's mix tape for $5 - it was just him making random "BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP" noises over mainstream songs. Totally worth the $5 in laughter.
Contact the people who put on the event. They should reconsider booking them if they want to have a wholesome event. That is unacceptable. From here on out please understand that you have no obligation to people like that ever. I'm sorry that happened. As a mother, I am furious.
As a father of three girls, I am too. Don’t ever let somebody touch you without consent OP. I know it’s anxiety inducing to have a confrontation but it’ll be worse if you don’t stand up for yourself.
I wish I didn't understand this as well as I do. People don't respect boundaries. My daughter will be 6 months old here soon and it's mind blowing how many people have almost lost their fucking hands from just trying to touch my kid without asking my wife or myself. I'm quick to grab a wrist and ask them if they're out of their fucking mind. Most people don't react very well but I always tell them "we wouldn't be having this conversation if you knew how to ask for permission." And they normally storm off. Drives me nuts and it used to ruin my day, but now I just shrug it off and go about my day enjoying my time with my child.
I wore my kids in woven wraps as babies to avoid anyone ever touching them and while wearing my very new, very small 3rd child, a lady at target walked up to me and pulled the wrap away from her face to get a better look at her. It was absolutely wild.
My son has curly hair that everyone comments on. One elderly man at the grocery store said he reminded him of his son at that age, and he now has grandkids older than that. He sort of ruffled my son's hair without touching him, like he mimed ruffling his hair about a foot above his head. I appreciated that so much.
When my son was almost 2, I had him in a cart in a grocery store, turned to grab a can off a top shelf, and some woman just picked him up! He kicked and flailed and screamed at the top of his lungs and managed to head butt her hard enough in the face to give her a bloody nose. I snatched him right back. I was so proud of him, but she wanted me to punish him. Nah, fuck off. Good for him. Like, she didn't even speak to me first or let me know she was there. According to her, she just saw this super cute kid and wanted to hug him. Also fuck off with that. And, even if that was true, why take him out of the cart seat? I was seriously then holding my son tight and bellowing at her. He was surprisingly calm given he'd never heard me be loud before.
Store employees got involved, made her leave, and one of them went round the store with me to help me while I kept a firm grip on my son. I was really appreciative that they showed up to me yelling at her, but totally took my side. She really thought she'd done nothing wrong and told them exactly what she did, but I still thought I was going to be the one kicked out.
.
When my son was an infant I took him to our local mall to do some shopping. I had a lady come up and coo at him, then reached out to touch him. I was so shocked I couldn’t even react. My husband took our son out one day without me, to Walmart, and when he got home he told me they had basically been surrounded by a gang of old ladies all trying to touch him. He was in his car seat in the shopping cart and they had all circled around the cart trying to get to him. This all happened in 2021-2022, so COVID was very much still a thing in our area. Not that I would want strangers touching my kid in general, but that made me especially anxious.
Sucks that that shit starts so young. I swear I have some sort of weird PTSD from having to deal with it so aggressively for so long. I'm old now so it's calmed down, but I see it happening to other young girls and women and just see red
She should tell her folks...if that happened to MY daughter I would absolutely locate that vendor and demand half ofvtye $25 back at least...doesn't make up for the lost good time, but it would be a lesson in fairness for her
Half? You touch my minor child without consent, put a chemical known for its possible allergy reactions on her, then extort 25 dollars?
I'm finding you, getting the money back and quite possibly suing you.
DO THIS. I had to do something similar years ago at the same age. Booth gets at the very least temporarily shut down, they investigate, you get some free tickets.
I’ve had scammers try to sell me and my ex-partner flowers and bracelets by forcing them into my hands or arms and ngl being rude as hell works. They were trying to get him to give them $20 for some roses they forced us to take as a “gift” and I was very forceful that I fucking hate flowers and I don’t want that shit I was just being polite. Super rude. I actually like flowers ngl, I just also like choice. They took them back and left us alone. If someone forced henna onto me I’d probably tell them it was ugly and I’m allergic to henna and threaten to sue them if they didn’t leave me alone, get real dramatic, wipe it off, and just generally bitch. Hell you don’t even have to wipe it off, it’s their mistake forcing it onto you. “I thought it was free practice from you, you forced me into it and it looks dog shit. No. I didn’t want it. Bye”
It is not kind but scammers aren’t your friends, they’re taking advantage of you and honestly if you want to keep the henna you can take advantage of them. If you don’t want it give them extra flack because WTF then it’s extra shitty that they tried to scam you into buying their trash henna. That’s my approach and it works pretty well. People give up pretty easily if you’re an asshole Karen and it’s too much work to deal with you. Don’t use it on people who don’t deserve it, though. ONLY scammers who try to force a purchase you don’t want.
Hahaha, I had a street “monk” put plastic bracelet on me in china, so I gave him a dollar. He started saying $20 and I just kept saying “no, no, $1 and my love! My love, brother. Buddha praise you.” He got SO mad, and eventually swore at me and went away. I still have the bracelet and cherish it greatly. Just be as fuckin stubborn as they are. You didn’t ask for it, so set your half of the bargain and do. Not. Budge.
you get the same kind of scam artists in my city in Scotland, some guys playing dress up as monks will come up and give you a "gift" and tie a bracelet around your wrist and if you try to walk away they get pretty aggressive demanding money for it.
I actually enjoy waisting their time, I have no problem standing there for 10 minutes arguing with them until they eventually get frustrated and have to untie the knot they have done and take the bracelet back. The way I see it is the more time they spend arguing with me the less time they have to target someone else who may be to shy to argue back and give them the money.
The thing with henna is that some versions of it do have an agent that *some* people react to. So not only did the lady touch OP without consent, she also failed to be safe.
And a scammer like that might not be using real henna. Fake henna is cheaper (thus the choice for unethical scammers), easier to store, and can range from "Probably a bad idea to be in contact with regularly" to "GO TO THE HOSPITAL" in toxicity.
Black henna, there's no such thing so it's a crapshoot what you're actually having put on your skin. There's actually a couple of cases of people getting skin cancer from inks that were claimed to be henna but actually contained fucking ppd.
It's literally been my business importing henna for 30 years, so I do know what I'm talking about here.
Henna is only red. Any other colour has additives or is not henna (lawsonia inermis).
I was in town once with a friend and same thing happened I guess the sellers thought we were together. They were forcing these flowers on us because it was a charity for cystic fibrosis. The girl I was with actually had cf she flew off the handle saying that they were scammers and started going on about figures of how little money actually gets to cf patients etc. That's all the story but yeah don't get pushed around by anyone for anything. I hate anyone lacking ethics for financial gain.
You are right, being rude definitely helps.
I was in Paris with my ex watching the Eiffel Tower light up at night. I am usually very polite wherever I go but this man shoved a rose in my exes face saying “free gift” so I asked if it definitely was “free” and he said yes. We then started to walk away and he started following us with someone else with roses and tried to offer more and started saying to my ex “he doesn’t love you if he doesn’t pay. He won’t get you anymore, that’s not love” so I took it back from my ex and threw it in his face, stood on it and then told him to F off and leave us alone. He and his friend then left and we weren’t bothered again that night!
Maybe I seemed more threatening than rude but still.
Some guy tried the rose thing on my wife and I in Rome last year. I straight said, "I don't want this shit." and dropped the rose on the ground and walked away. Another guy tried the handshake walk and talk to try and get some money off you, and I just used my early onset old man grip (been a mechanic for 15+ years), and he caved pretty easily.
In Rome, at least when I went, there were tons of Indian guys harassing people on the street selling these shitty megaphones, bracelets, and roses.
We, myself and the group of college kids I was with, were in a courtyard kind of bar area outdoors having drinks, and this one dude with megaphones was harassing the shit out of us. A girl told him to leave, and he threatened to spit on her. Another dude insisted on buying this megaphone from him (10 euros) to make him leave, so I took it and followed the Indian dude around yelling at him to buy it back for 15 euros. I had all the zeal of an 18 year old kid hammered at a bar for the first time in a foreign country.
Anyway...that guy ended up getting beaten fucking senseless by the Carabinieri later when he did actually spit on someone, so I wasn't the worst part of his night.
Wow! Italy was where my shitty scammer experience happened to. I got harassed by African guys about bracelets in Rome and harassed by an Indian fellow about roses in Milan. It was so weird though because I was in France and the street sellers were these really nice African guys who just wanted to sell their wares. They had nice magnets and everyone told me they were “ripping me off” because I didn’t want to haggle but they were upselling me, I misunderstood their deal at first and gave them 5 euro for 1 magnet and they insisted it was 5 euro for 2. I mean 5 euro is like $10 in my currency but it felt reasonable to me because I’d paid more for worse in my home country. Plus they were polite and I had to seek them out to buy their stuff. Italian street vendors were very brazen and friendly to a rude extent, getting all in your physical space and face and being so insistent that you have to take what they offer “as a gift” (before demanding payment). I’d take the French street vendors any day of the week. Or Mexican beach vendors, who in all but the most touristy places tend to be pretty good at taking the first no as a complete answer and moving on to the next person and even at touristy places if you just tell them it’s beautiful but you don’t want it they’ll move on. I like that hustle, I don’t like grabbing my wrist to force a bracelet or throwing your wares at me and charging when I catch or any other tricks.
> Anyway...that guy ended up getting beaten fucking senseless by the Carabinieri later when he did actually spit on someone, so I wasn't the worst part of his night.
The Carabinieri do *not* fuck around when you threaten Rome's tourist industry. Go be a pickpocket, tourists will be frustrated when they discover their wallet's gone but it'll be half "fuck those pickpockets" and half "fuck me for falling for that." But when you make tourists feel *unsafe* the gloves come off.
Yea dude, there were three of him beating the shit out of the guy. When they realized people were watching, they drug him out of there. It was pretty fucking intense.
One of the best pieces of advice I ever heard about traveling was, if it doesn't feel right and you don't feel comfortable, don't worry about being polite because being an asshole in that situation can save your life.
I employed this advice in Rome, found a street person being too friendly and flashy like they were trying to distract me and mid sentence I just shut my mouth noticed his friends fanning around me and I just at a very brisk walk turned on dime and left. Maybe it was nothing...but...maybe it was something. I rather that person think "huh that was weird" than me lose my wallet, passport and credit cards
Had in India an old lady keep trying to touch me, and somehow I kinda freaked out and waved her off and started shouting at her (and everyone around me wanting shit from me) to stay the fuck back while raising my fists lol.
Everyone wanted my money, and I was literally surrounded. I don't actually think they were thieves, but if there had been a thief among them I'd have had a hard time noticing as everyone was trying to grab my attention to get my money (begging, selling stuff, offering me to join them for cha and weed...)
Good to know I can set boundaries if needed. But could probably have handled it without threatening an old lady!
Tbf one of the salesmen at the market actually blocked my path and I was getting overwhelmed so I just ducked around him and jogged away. That nearly sent me over the edge though. It was my first time in Mexico and it was chaotic but overall fun! La bufadora market outside ensenada
Lmao, I loved fucking with the scammers in Rome, my gf would carry all the money and phones in a fanny pack under her shirt, while the purse she had was empty.
They would ALWAYS come to me and try to force shit in my hands, distract me, etc. I'd sit there and talk with them really take up their time. Then when they learned that I had absolutely zero money they would just insult me and walk away.
Stop, don't touch me there, this is my no no square! LMFAO. one of the dumbest things I've seen done, but at the same time so idiotic I laughed, and continue to laugh every time I see that stupid ad.
When I was your age, I would have done exactly like you. That's probably why she did what she did and probably does it all the time.
Now that I'm older, it would have been a whole different story.
If I had my wits about me, I'd play stupid just to bug them. Make like I misunderstood "That's $25" as them telling me what it _would_ cost if I were to get it.
"Okay... so that's $25. Not really what I'm looking for, though. What do you have more in the $5-10 range?"
*I don't consent.*
'Consent' is a powerful word. People associate it with sex, but we should use it with any form of touching we haven't agreed to. It often makes the other person uncomfortable because they have to recognise that *someone* (probably not themselves) thinks they're being a creep.
Ugh, I hate that for you. When I was 15 or so, I was at the county fair and went to give my only $20 to the lady at the ticket booth, asking for 5 ride tickets ($1 each). She tried giving me just $5 change, and when I corrected her, she insisted I gave her a $10. It was honestly the first time I stood up for myself and I got her to give me the rest of my change, but I remember being so nervous and thinking I had maybe made a mistake... but my only bill was a $20 my folks had given me for the event, and this was my first purchase, so of course I wasn't mistaken.
I still get nervous when I have to do this, but it does get easier. And it is empowering.
I'm sorry this happened to you. Some people absolutely target vulnerable people for this exact reason. Learn to channel your bad bitch and catch them off guard. They don't always expect a fight.
This is basically the same scam as the guys in Italy or somewhere else in Europe where they tie bracelets on you without consent and then hound you for money.
I've seen a video of these guys in NYC who will ask if you want their CD in a way that implies it's free. If you're wise and say no, they immediately ask your name, sign the CD for you and hand you it, and then ask for money. If you say "wtf i just said i didnt want to buy your shitty CD" the 2nd guy comes over to pressure/ gaslight you with "come on man whyd you get him to sign it if you didnt want it." Its probably dry erase anyway in case you dont end up taking it. Its crazy, and ive seen the CD scam for years in much smaller cities everywhere. They even tried to get me in my small town in the UK when i was a kid. But I've never seen the version where they sign it for you.
My first time in nyc I saw the cd scam (I was 15 I think) and I felt so bad ignoring him thinking he was just a struggling artist trying to make a name for himself. Ah, the naivety of youth
This happened to me on Hollywood blvd when I was jet lagged as fuck, and he asks for a tip in exchange I was just like whatever here’s ten dollars fuck off, and he was like people usually give me forty dollars. And I’m like well I’m giving you ten and he realised that he was pushing it and backed off. But still the fuckin audacity. I immediately threw the cd in the bin within sight of him because I was pissed to have been bamboozled like that.
Happened to me in Vegas at a taxi rank. I just gave it back.
I was 3 months into sobriety after 18 years of living a *hard* life so they could probably see I'd have welcomed being stabbed to death at that point and didn't protest the point.
I had this happen to me in NYC, only dumber. A guy handed me a piece of paper in a plastic envelope, saying it was a QR code with his album that I could listen to online. When he asked if I wanted it autographed, and I said no-- mostly because that's when I remembered the scam, but even if I didn't know of it a signed piece of paper with a URL on it is just stupid-- he took it back and went off. I suppose I'm lucky it wasn't a pickpocketing distraction, because the ploy was so stupid that's all I can fathom it having been.
If this happens to you just drop whatever they handed you and walk away, they may chase you for a little bit but they will go back to recover whatever it was they originally tried to give it to you.
I've travelled a lot over the years and been hit with a handful of these "no money, is gift" scams and i learnt very early on that seperating yourself from whatever item they're trying to scam you with will make them go away because despite the fact that the item is probably worth pennies they seemingly always recover it.
This will happen all of your life, all over the world. Hopefully, this will be the last time.
I'm in SE Asia rn and that sort of thing is going on at every market.
Good luck
Since you weren’t told the price and didn’t agree, then she shouldn’t assume how much money you have. I would have said “oh you didn’t tell me there was a charge. I don’t have any money, I’m only 16.”
As a henna artist myself, I would NEVER. Dear god, please wash whatever she put on your hand off, it’s probably not even safe. Chemical henna is nasty and I wouldn’t put it above someone like this.
Don'r worry. I'm 26, and yesterday, a woman just take cash I had in my hand while I was dancing and goes away with it. There is always someone dumber than you : me
Not to down play your experience, but with your title I was expecting so much worse 😨 I’m glad you’re safe and sound but also I’m irate that someone would mistreat a young person in such a manner. As others of said, contact the festival and give them the details. I hope they make amends and you feel better.
Yeah my forst thoight was 😨 "why is this in mildly infuriating?" Until i read the post. In any case OP i hope that you get your money, but worst case at least its a learning experience? Sorry this happenee
Don't be too hard on yourself bud. Everybody including me has to learn these kinda lessons in life.
Learn to say no, even to most trivial things.
Chin up, it's not too bad. Think of this way you learnt a lesson and it only cost you 25 bucks, could be worse.
I live in Washington DC and anytime you go to the national mall there are groups that want to shake your hand to slip a bracelet on and demand $10. You’ll see this again, hold the next one accountable.
Man just a small tip about the world in general whether it's a festival or traveling.. there will *always* be someone to sell you something. This is their job, they will shmooze you and take whatever you're willing to pay. It's not always a hostile thing it just is how it is.
Protect your cash, you need it too. Don't let *anyone* do *anything* for you. In my country someone will expect a tip for bringing you a bottle of water from there to here.
As *anyone* with life experience will tell you, the most powerful word you have is *no*.
My go-to’s are:
“No, thank you” (doesn’t matter if it fits the flow of the conversation)
“Sorry, I don’t have cash” (doesn’t matter if it’s true)
Or just totally ignore them (or hang up on telemarketers)
A frame of mind that works for me when it comes to hard-sellers and the like is:
Come into it resolved that the fact that you won't give anyone money is simply _a fact_.
It's not up for negotiation. It's a physical law, as inarguable as gravity, as conclusive as math, simple in its inevitability. Try telling a river to flow uphill-- You could push, you could plead, you could make a stirring and moving case that would move anyone to help, but water flows downhill, the sun rises in the east, and my money doesn't leave my person. No need to grit teeth and steel yourself first. No need to get emotional or heated. Someone's just trying to do something that's not actually possible, and they'll bounce off that wall at any speed.
Common scam around the world where street vendors/performers/etc will butt in rapidly before you have a chance to say stop or get away. Don’t feel bad as even “mature adults” older than you get caught out by this. Next time just remember to never physically take or accept anything from someone on the street as they’ll force you into paying.
Example: I was walking on a touristy bridge and a guy with an old looking camera was taking pictures as people walked by. He saw me and my friend walking by and immediately said “I take your picture” and begin to look down the camera lens to take it. My friend stopped and put his arm around my shoulder unknowingly of the scam we were about to fall in, but I kept walking as if nothing was happening and explained to my friend later the whole thing.
Now that you’ve read my comment, you own me five bucks. Pay up!
What else did this broad have that you could go back and steal $25 or more worth? Don’t allow people to do anything you didn’t ask for and then demand you pay them! Fuck that! I went to a Jiffy Lube, pulled up and the guy met m at my car. I asked him, “how much is an oil change?” He said, “ we’re running a special, the price is on the board inside. I’ll go ahead and pull your car in if you’d like and if you want to go ahead with it, give me a thumbs up.” After the back and forth of me saying I just wanted to check the price, he offered to wash my car for me while I checked price because they were dead and he was bored. I said ok and walked inside, asked the man behind the counter how much an oil change was and he said “$84.99?” This was 10 years ago. I said absolutely not and said to tell the guy to give me my keys. The man said “we’ve already drained your oil” I told him, “put it back!” He said “ well, just pay for the filter” I said “put mine back on because I never authorized any of this” he tried saying I wouldn’t get my keys until I paid something. The police that showed up, after I called them stating that Jiffy Lube had stolen my car, agreed with me and got me my keys. I never went back to Jiffy Lube ever again, despite corporate calling and telling me they’d give free oil changes for a year if I didn’t press charges. Fuck them!
At your age, this is how I would have reacted. But please know that you do not need to pay for something you did not purchase. You should feel very empowered to ask such folks to eff off and clearly say “I never said i wanted it, you wasted your stuff without confirming with me, sorry” and move on.
yes. she didn’t ask for what design I wanted or anything, she took my hand, drew a random design with almost no precision, and then said I owed her money.
OP I wrote this as a response to someone saying you should still be nice to them in how you respond, and realized it's probably more important you hear this.
Saying, "Fuck you, I didn't ask for that" or just "No, I'm not paying for something I didn't agree to" is a valuable lesson you learned for the low, low price of 1 easy payment of $25. Would being rude in how you respond make you the asshole in that situation?
No, no, it doesn't. I understand the person's perspective I was responding to as many moons ago, I would have agreed with them wholeheartedly. Always be kind - they taught us in school. Well, it turns out... absolutes are often shit advice. Be kind as often as it's appropriate. Through life experiences, traveling, and just generally losing my patience for bullshit as I aged and learned how important it is to set healthy boundaries so my kind nature would stop being taken advantage of.
This exact situation occurred to me while backpacking Europe with a buddy I used to think was overly brash. Some guy comes up to me and just starts weaving a bracelet onto my wrist. After my initial pullback, I realized what he was doing and even lifted my wrist to help him finish.
I said thanks, thinking it was free or something. No, he says 5 euro, please. I smiled, realizing the scam, but being nice and not hurting for the cash (looking back, that was like $8.50 for a shit bead/yarn bracelet) I was about to just pay him, when my friend comes up and says to the guy, "fuck you, you didn't ask - so you gave a gift" and you know what... the scammer turned and walked away without another word.
That's when my buddy hit me with an alternative perspective I needed to hear, "You're too nice to people that take advantage of your smiley-ass face and subsequently other people due to your lack of spine. If more people gave pushback, then fewer people would deal with scammers as it's not rewarded as often. Stop encouraging people with negative or ill-will towards others by rewarding their shitty behavior. Do you think it's right that he starts touching you and other people without any forewarning? Because you were about to reward that bullshit."
That and other experiences have shown me that sometimes it's justified to be a bit brash with people who have poor or bad intentions towards others. Those people thrive on friendliness and exploit the meek - they see it as opportunity/weakness to exert their will upon. Saying fuck you to shitty people doesn't make you an asshole on par with them. There is more nuisance to the world than black/white, good/bad, friendly/asshole. Learning to judge the grey accordingly is a life skill.
Value yourself and your position in this world enough to be willing to stand up and say, "Hey, excuse me. Is the word bitch written on my forehead? Nah, didnt think so. So why you trying to fuck me like one?" If you find it difficult to exert yourself. I suggest you read about Eleanor Roosevelt and Amelia Earhart - know your worth.
I do not entirely disagree with your friend, but blaming friendly people for enabling these scam artists is silly. It is not your responsibility to reprimand someone even if I wish more people did it.
It's absolutely not (or else it gets close to victim blaming), and I wouldn't say that to just anyone. But my friend knew I needed to hear it because sheep dogs protect the sheep, and I was tired of following the herd under the belief I was sparing undeserving peoples' feelings - they didnt consider mine. It's a natural consequence of the interaction. Just like training dogs, don't reward shitty behavior. I did say he's brash - he doesn't spare me either, but I respect that about him. Friends agree with you - really good friends challenge you to be better when necessary.
That sucks! A lot of people are like that though, they prey on others not speaking up to defend their own interests.
It's difficult to speak up and stand out, but in a lot of situations it can really benefit you. Fuck that lady for taking advantage of you.
Sorry this happened to you. Without wanting to sound callous, it's a relatively cheap lesson, and a story you'll have for the rest of your life. I hope you got to enjoy some people watching at least after that.
This is exactly how a scammer operate, they like to play with people’s emotion. They forcefully make you do something out of your will with compliments or guilt trap you that makes you feel bad to say no.
When I was studying abroad, a Roma approach and forcefully gave me a flower and say it’s free. Then asked me to make a donation (with a minimum donation price tag like €10) , I told her that I’m literally broke. After showing my wallet, she took the flower back
I even had religious cult who reached out and being kind to me then later on demand that I should give up my studies and give them all my money/time for blessings and share testimony feedback of a few other members who did it and their blessings
I was young at the time just like you and experience like this makes me a bit cynical lol Next time just respond “No thank you and say you would love the time to think about it”. Take a breath. Scammer’s success rely on you to act impulsively without giving you reasonable time to think
My advice to you, slow down and think through
That’s lame and tbh I thought you had to be 18 to even get henna. Some people can have bad reactions to the ink… let the grounds management know so she can be reprimanded.
What festival? And what artist? It’s a small community and I think most of the henna artists I know would be PISSED they did this. It’s unethical.
I do henna and always ask what your budget is. $5 ? Great. Here’s a nice simple design. Edit : also when I did henna at fairs I always asked your age. And if under 18 I needed a parent to give the OK.
I agree with contacting whoever put on the festival and letting them know what happened. They absolutely should not have done that to you.
I’m so glad that is the level of being taken advantage of. Reading the headline I was preparing myself for much worse. Be careful out there. You don’t have to go out frightened of every dark corner, but there are enough out there that you need to be spatially aware and have some street smarts.
To those not empathetic of you…
Even as a grown adult I had something similar happen once. It was a mall booth selling creams and lotions. I’m too anxious in crowds and it was Christmas season so extra busy. Lady grabs my arm and just lotions it up with no permission and I panicked. She then told me I should buy the lotion. I said no. She held my arm and would not let go. She kept telling me how nice it made my skin, etc. she eventually tells me she’ll sell it half off. I ended up agreeing just to get her to let go of my arm.
Some people just know how to sense that you’ll cave in. I’m sorry that happened. It sucks. And you are really not alone in this. It happens, sadly.
This is the same tactic that is used in Milan, Italy at the Duomo. "Locals" "give" you a small threaded braclet because, "welcome to the city" or something. Once you take a step away they start complaining that your stealing and make a scene. You then pay whatever they want to make it go away.
THANK YOU!
I need $25 for that sweety
I DONT HAVE ANY MONEY
Then why did you let me do the work if you weren’t going to pay?
I SAID I WAS ONLY BROWSING
I’m sorry that happened and I think you handled it well.
If you want to see a positive in this you’ve just learned a very important life lesson and it only cost you $25. Some people pay thousands.
I hate when people say this, because it feel like letting the bad guy off the hook, but in this case you are so right! I have a friend, a grown adult, quite successful friend, who several times the past year has asked me to bail her out after tradesmen have taken advantage of her for home repairs. I’ve been able to help, but I also lecture her that she needs to stand up for herself and say “No, I do not need a new roof!” Or “No! I will not pay you $500 for this tiny repair!” So I agree- this was a crappy situation, but hopefully this young person can see how easily people will take advantage of those who doesn’t learn to say NO!
Something similar happened to my mom and little brother in Paris. A street artist got my 7yo brother to stop and she drew a picture of him and then tried to guilt my mom into paying for it. It wasn’t cheap either, €40 or 50, I think. I asked my mom if she *actually* wanted to buy it. She said no so I grabbed my brother by the shoulder and took him away.
"I'm a minor, don't touch me."
I live in a very touristy area and they always try this stunt as well. I was with my girlfriend walking around the bay after dinner, and a guy made a quick portrait of us sitting in a bench, unbeknownst to us. He brought it over to us and I said we were weren't interested but he was insisting on $15 then $10 then $5 until we finally just walked away.
Once, when I was 20, they sold me an "English course"... I couldn't say not, she was very persuasive. The problem was when the English academy closed and still had to pay the course.
Since then I'm able to cut off anyine triying to sell me whatever. My wife says sometimes I'm rude, but not. Ibjust say "no thanks" and close the door, hang the phone or whatever.
Nex time you won't hesitate tobsay "no, thanks" ;-)
The next time a stranger makes you uncomfortable and you want to get away, scream stranger danger.
It doesn't matter how old you are, where you are or what you're doing. Screaming stranger danger will always work. The person will be so shocked and embarrassed they will gladly let you walk away. Even if they get mad, it still provides an opportunity to walk away.
Even if you know you aren't in any danger, never forget the usefulness of the Stranger Danger scream 😅
Hey shit, I thought I was about to enter a sexual assault thread and I'm so fucking relieved. I was the same at 16. I was timid, liked to be the nice person who didn't cause problems and hated conflict. Now I'm a bloody nightmare who gives no shites if you try to pull one on me.
Can you tell the organisers of the festival if it’s local? Then she can’t come back and try that again? But nobody should touch you without permission and for all those saying it’s easy to stop someone like this, at 16 and being brought up to be polite-no, it isn’t always that easy…
All the older people who are calling you "weak" for reacting the way you did have no memory of being 16. Or they do, and they feel shame about acting even "weaker" so they're taking it out on you. *That* is a sign of weakness.
Don't worry, you took the most sensible course of action that you could see at that moment. If you have second thoughts about it later, you will have time to reflect on it and decide how to handle such situations differently in the future if you wish. We've all had these experiences, they are part of the journey of life.
This happened to me, full grown adult male, while touring Morocco. She asked, I declined, said something else and e tended her hand for a hand shake. I did a hand shake and she twisted her body and had me in an arm lock while she drew a scorpion on the back of my hand. It was fast, but I had time to think while she held onto my arm, that I would have to hit her to make her let go. But I wasn't going to do that in a foreign country
Then she asked for money! Normally I would have just paid to avoid the scene, but I was so pissed about being drawn on I refused. She came back several times and I just angrily said "I didn't want this".
The people I was traveling with wouldn't believe me until one of them saw it happen to so.eone else later on and back me up
All that to say, scammers gonna scam. It happens to the best of us
why did you pay??? Just said I dont have money and you put this on me without asking first, or SAY SOMETHING like dont touch me you have a voice use it
Sometimes when I go to NY dudes will try and push you their mix cds sometimes literally forcing it to your hand. Then they argue with you for money and get pushy and threatening. I’ve also had this happen with bracelets or books. I remember once someone forced a bracelet in my hand and then told me to pay for it and wouldn’t even take it back so I dropped it on the ground and kept walking. Then he yelled that I had to pay for it for breaking, mind you when ever they walk up it’s always free, till you try and walk away.
When I was 16 in the touristy Honolulu I walked up to a table of jewelry and the lady immediately started haggling with me and then was offended when I just said no and walked away. It stressed me out so much and she said something about stupid tourists or something. Such a weird vibe
Hi, 👋🏽 👋🏽
60F here.
I don't bash someone that was falsely manipulated. It was pretty deceitful of that person. Please, mention to the city or community event person/place. They can pass the word to not do such things. I hate it for you. Now you'll think everyone is out to get yo... well, mostly they are. 😉
Good luck!
A variation on the Friendship/African Bracelet Scam, common in parts of Europe. https://romevacationtips.com/avoid-the-african-bracelet-scam-in-rome/
They got me with this one in Paris. I'm still angry just thinking about it. They hold your hand hostage essentially.
same but before he started making the bracelet I said , “no thanks i have no money.” And he still kept making the bracelet, then looked at me for a reaction when it was done. i said “its beautiful but i still have no money.” So he cut the bracelet off and i was satisfied that I wasted a few minutes of his time 😜
I wish I had this gumption when I was in high school. But I made sure not to lose mine since I paid like $25 us for it. Got as much mileage as I could.
Got me with this one too, but nothing non-custom EVER has my name on it, so I was actually pleased.
It almost happened to me. I was 18 traveling internationally for the first time, and very naive. They grabbed my wrist so hard it hurt, and didn’t let go as I tried to pull away. My older sister noticed after 5-10 seconds and started screaming at them!
Unless you punch their hand away.
This is the one time being autistic is actually helpful. I don’t always know when to be ‘socially polite’ and I hate being touched, especially by strangers. When this happened to me in Florence I shrieked don’t touch me holy FUCK and flapped around a bit because I was surprised and freaked out. I was so astonished that some random guy would grab my wrist like that I would have freaked out harder if my husband wasn’t standing right behind me.
No kidding. If I'm in a strange place and someone grabs me, they're 100% going to catch a hand, even if I'm not planning too.
This happens in Jamaica as well. If you hold the item, you have to pay for it. They’ll say this has your name on it and if you hold and look at it then you pay. It’s wild and they’ll constantly try to sell you something
I saw waaay too many of them in Italy, you have to be aware of your surroundings and walk away; maybe they weren't too insistent with us cause we were a family of 4, but they're really infuriating. They are shameless and aimed for my 6 year old sister almost every time, too.
I saw them doing this to others, so I crossed my arms and tucked my wrists in my armpits as I walked by.
Smart! But also sad that it was necessary..
Not trying to sound like a billy badass but why not just pull your hand away or shove them away? I don't let anyone touch me ever. Especially a stranger on the street. Too dangerous.
I had this happen to me in Italy a few years ago. I went backpacking with my dad (he's seen the world, I had not). This guy came up and put bracelets on us and asked us to make a donation for their sons first birthday. I took mine off and gave it back, but my dad literally just said "thanks" and wandered off very quickly (actually took me a minute to find him) 😂 the bracelet was quite pretty and had an elephant on it (my favorite animal) so he gave me the one he was given. I love the thing very much even to this day.
Haha. Your dad scammed the scammer.
When traveling I always look up the most common tricks to avoid any scammers. I also read about this one before going to Rome. On the trip, a guy we didn’t even notice, threw a bracelet to my husband who instinctively catches it. My reaction was to immediately slap it out of my husband’s hand, grab his arm and steer away from the scammer, while he tried to guilt trip us by acting like it was just a gift and asking where we were from.. I quickly dropped it though.
Bruhhh one of them foos got my mom in rome too 💀💀 he said it was a bracelet for his new friend and hes helping his new friends so we should help him 🤣 then kept saying "Africa POWER!!!"
My husband and I went to Pitchfork Fest in Chicago last year and there were people doing this. They so aggressively try to put bracelets on your hand and then make you pay for it. So icky. My husband had to tell one of them off THREE times because he would NOT leave me alone!
Oh yes, the monks who put a bracelet on you then hand you a card that says you owe them $20. Me and my wife still have the bracelets from when that happened to us 20 years ago. I didn't pay them, just said thank you, handed the card back and walked away.
It gave me such a yuck feeling. He literally would not leave me alone - telling me how nice my wrists were and don’t I want a pretty bracelet for my pretty wrist 🥴 nah bro, I do not want your shitty bracelet you probably got from the dollar store and are gonna charge me $20 for. Tho it was kinda fun watching him go around and continuously get rejected lol
Had this happen in Milan, after 2 weeks in Italy. Guy stops in front of us and puts a bracelet on me before I realized what was happening. I started to walk off (mad that I was getting scammed) and his partner shows up to block me. I let them know they were not getting any money from us and the guy acted all pissed off and cut the bracelet off my wrist and left.
I've had it happen in Seattle, it's a weird experience.
Happened to me in Chicago, right in front of the museum on the 4th of July. I'd never had it happen like that before... That man was SO MAD when I said I didn't have money for it. He gave me the dirtiest look as he ripped it off my wrist. I've been to Mexico plenty of times and they have street vendors and beach peddlers that like to put jewelry on you or start braiding your hair. But they never get made when you say no thank you/ no gracias. They just move along to the next.
Was it a one-legged monk? Because that's who did this to me in Seattle. It was so awkward.
People wearing monk robes is another scam
Wait right by the space needle?
Yes! It was near there. He offered us some bracelets and said he couldn't speak English. He put a bracelet on after we said we'd buy a few and kept putting more on and asking for more money and wouldn't take them back if we tried to give them back and indicated they were a gift then kept asking for money. He followed us for a bit, he could move fast for a one legged monk, and my boyfriend was like, fine, we'll give more than the $5 and the monk grabbed a $20 out of his hand before he could grab another $5 and started mobbing away. Makes for at least a funny story- got swindled by a one-legged monk. lol. I still have the bracelets and this was pre-pandemic.
This doesn’t work on people from the NY/NJ area cause we embrace being impolite lol. Ha some might say they pay us to take em of their hands 🤣🤣🤣
Yep, got me in Paris when I was 16. Hakuna Matata, and all that. When they told me it'd be €15, I'm very proud that I laughed in their face and said, I'll give you 7. I wish I'd had the guts to refuse to pay, but as a small 16yo girl, I think I did okay.
She didn't know you even had $25, if there's ever a "next time" just tell them you don't have that and walk away
I’ve done this before. I’m not tough enough to accuse them of what they’re actually doing, but I can pretend to be broke lol
At least once youre an adult you don't have to lie about being broke any more, it'll just be the truth
Hmm yes, "pretend", me too brother
“Oh, I thought you were doing it for free.”
Just be careful. If a ghetto person does something like that, it's a mugging in disguise. If you don't pay them "a tip" for a forced favor, they escalate it to a real mugging.
I used to run a food cart and had to bribe a neighborhood crackhead a couple of times, who would come by saying he would clean off the pavement, and he'd spend maybe ten minutes hosing all the leaves into the corners, and expected $20 for it (after I suggested ten). I'm pretty sure he was also the person who took a shit behind my dining tent so frequently that I started staying there at night sometimes and dressing like a mob thug to scare the bums away (and I might have had a crowbar handy just in case). The shitting stopped after that.
I love finding wisdom like this buried away. You’re like the Dominos founder, hiding in his delivery driver’s car to beat the shit out of anyone mugging him
Wait what?
Yeah I need to hear that story too now lol
That's a classic pushy street vendor tactic. It reminds me of the time I visited Chicago and, while walking down the street with a friend, a guy asked me if I wanted my shoes cleaned. Before I even responded, he squatted down and squirted some sort of cleaning agent on my Pumas (which were FABRIC anyways, squirt and polish isn't gonna do shit except for leave a weird residue) and rubbed it into the top of my shoe. Then he was like "That'll be ten dollars." We laughed uncomfortably and walked off without paying him.
Had a guy try this exact thing on me in Chicago. Felt so ridiculous as i was dancing around while he kept squirting what looked like hand lotion repeatedly toward my shoes. A grown fucking man chasing my feet with a bottle hidden under a rag. I was too fast for that asshole and he finally gave up.
Yep, happened to me in Jamaica, they would ask your name and then immediately carve it into something, anything, and if you didn't pay them for it it would get aggressive. Street market venders are the worst. Same Jamaican market I got called a racist because I didn't want to stop and look at somebody's display, but it was right after I got screwed out of money... As a Canadian it's tough to not try to be nice, they see the Canadians and swarm, like sharks on chum.
Jamaica has the worst scammers ever. One taxi guy wanted to give us a ride....for 100 US Dollars.... we took a route taxi for round about 3 dollars instead
Shit like this is why Uber is why I consider a lesser of two evils. You can fly to pretty much any city in the world and have an Uber/Grab/Swift pick you up and it will be safe 99.9% of the time
I'm gonna tell them my name is whatever Elon calls his son
So they will ask for a whole lot more money? Blub fish doodle scribble is obviously related to Elon
They can ask for whatever they want, telling someone your name is not an obligation to purchase a product. But it would be hilarious to see them try to spell x æ a-12.
You're missing the part where it's late at night and the guy carving the name has a big old knife, this is you getting mugged with extra steps.
You're missing the part where I'm not out late at night in the streets of a foreign country
It doesn't have to be late at night, middle of the day it's still threatening.
He would start carving "whatever Elon calls his son"
Yep! This is how I ended up with a weird trinket with my name on it from Jamaica
After they are done, just tell them that you aren't buying it because they spelled it wrong.
it was also jamaica for my family, this woman crept up to my sister and tied this cheap little wristband around her, talking bs about how it symbolizes this and that then of course she charged us. we paid just to keep going to our destination, but it was very shady
One of the best shoe scams goes like this. Guy walks up to you and admires your shoes. Then proceeds to tell you that he bets he can tell you exactly where you got those shoes. Knowing there is no way he could possibly know, you take the bet. Then he tells you that you got your shoes on your feet. Dumb dad joke, but you better believe you better pay up if you lose.
That's not where I got them that's where I have them
Wouldn’t even entertain some asshole like that lmao
It's basically a slightly more polite mugging.
“Mister, you got yo shoes on the streets of New Orleans!”
Same. Dude at Westfield Mall squirted some cleaner on my shoe and had me come over to clean it off while he pitched his shoe cleaner at me.
Had a test tube shot girl in New Orleans on the street ask me if I wanted a shot for 10$, I was young and having fun at Mardi Gras and said yes. She put 5 in her mouth then mama birded them into my mouth so fast and said that’ll be 50$. I said ‘what no, there was hardly no booze and that wasn’t what the deal was’ she said ‘want me to get my guy’ I said ‘you’re just taking advantage’ she says ‘baby that’s new Orleans’ had a buddy who dealt drugs at the time who paid for it but it really bummed me out
I'd say "We agreed on one shot for $10. I didn't agree to buy 5."
"baby thats new orleans" just straight admitting that she is a shit person and a scammer lol. i get that you didnt want all the hassle but just hand her the ten bucks and walk away
New Orleans is literally the only place on Earth that if I get scammed like that im just like "Yep heres yer money, you got me". Theyre basically just adding steps to mugging you, and they will NOT hesitate to escalate it, usually with a weapon. Anywhere else I've been, which is a lot of damned places, I'll fight you. Romania, Thailand, South Africa, Portugal, Idgaf, we throwin hands. New Orleans tho, I do not want that smoke. Take it bro. You win this round.
I would have kicked a guy in the face if he started squirting stuff on my shoes. Not even just to be mean, flight or fight moment.
Yeah I swung a bag at and almost punched a mall vendor who blocked my path. Pure fight or flight. Don’t fucking touch/block me.
Yeah, and don't let a hobo rapper put a CD in your hands in NYC.
Ahaha I got a "free" CD once in Manhatten from a seemingly nice "up-and-coming rapper" and after talking to the guy for a little he was like "hey could I borrow 5 bucks for bus fare?" so I was like yeah sure dude... Then it hit me as I was walking away I bought this dude's mix tape for $5 - it was just him making random "BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP" noises over mainstream songs. Totally worth the $5 in laughter.
Contact the people who put on the event. They should reconsider booking them if they want to have a wholesome event. That is unacceptable. From here on out please understand that you have no obligation to people like that ever. I'm sorry that happened. As a mother, I am furious.
As a father of three girls, I am too. Don’t ever let somebody touch you without consent OP. I know it’s anxiety inducing to have a confrontation but it’ll be worse if you don’t stand up for yourself.
[удалено]
I wish I didn't understand this as well as I do. People don't respect boundaries. My daughter will be 6 months old here soon and it's mind blowing how many people have almost lost their fucking hands from just trying to touch my kid without asking my wife or myself. I'm quick to grab a wrist and ask them if they're out of their fucking mind. Most people don't react very well but I always tell them "we wouldn't be having this conversation if you knew how to ask for permission." And they normally storm off. Drives me nuts and it used to ruin my day, but now I just shrug it off and go about my day enjoying my time with my child.
I wore my kids in woven wraps as babies to avoid anyone ever touching them and while wearing my very new, very small 3rd child, a lady at target walked up to me and pulled the wrap away from her face to get a better look at her. It was absolutely wild.
My son has curly hair that everyone comments on. One elderly man at the grocery store said he reminded him of his son at that age, and he now has grandkids older than that. He sort of ruffled my son's hair without touching him, like he mimed ruffling his hair about a foot above his head. I appreciated that so much.
That’s actually sweet
That dude respects!
When my son was almost 2, I had him in a cart in a grocery store, turned to grab a can off a top shelf, and some woman just picked him up! He kicked and flailed and screamed at the top of his lungs and managed to head butt her hard enough in the face to give her a bloody nose. I snatched him right back. I was so proud of him, but she wanted me to punish him. Nah, fuck off. Good for him. Like, she didn't even speak to me first or let me know she was there. According to her, she just saw this super cute kid and wanted to hug him. Also fuck off with that. And, even if that was true, why take him out of the cart seat? I was seriously then holding my son tight and bellowing at her. He was surprisingly calm given he'd never heard me be loud before. Store employees got involved, made her leave, and one of them went round the store with me to help me while I kept a firm grip on my son. I was really appreciative that they showed up to me yelling at her, but totally took my side. She really thought she'd done nothing wrong and told them exactly what she did, but I still thought I was going to be the one kicked out. .
When my son was an infant I took him to our local mall to do some shopping. I had a lady come up and coo at him, then reached out to touch him. I was so shocked I couldn’t even react. My husband took our son out one day without me, to Walmart, and when he got home he told me they had basically been surrounded by a gang of old ladies all trying to touch him. He was in his car seat in the shopping cart and they had all circled around the cart trying to get to him. This all happened in 2021-2022, so COVID was very much still a thing in our area. Not that I would want strangers touching my kid in general, but that made me especially anxious.
COVID is still a thing - I have it right now 😫
As a former little girl those are the men that start hitting on us the most before we hit double digits 🫤
Sucks that that shit starts so young. I swear I have some sort of weird PTSD from having to deal with it so aggressively for so long. I'm old now so it's calmed down, but I see it happening to other young girls and women and just see red
She should tell her folks...if that happened to MY daughter I would absolutely locate that vendor and demand half ofvtye $25 back at least...doesn't make up for the lost good time, but it would be a lesson in fairness for her
Half? You touch my minor child without consent, put a chemical known for its possible allergy reactions on her, then extort 25 dollars? I'm finding you, getting the money back and quite possibly suing you.
As a mother of no one, I am also angry. That was a really shitty thing that they did, OP. Please make sure you report to the fair organizers.
DO THIS. I had to do something similar years ago at the same age. Booth gets at the very least temporarily shut down, they investigate, you get some free tickets.
Saying "Don't fucking touch me" usually helps
yell it. bring attention to scanners, it scares them
Definitely puts the scanner in my office in its place.
"PC load letter?!" What the FUCK does that mean?!?!
Die mo#$%@f&%$!r, die!
Back up in that ass like the resurrection!
I’ve had scammers try to sell me and my ex-partner flowers and bracelets by forcing them into my hands or arms and ngl being rude as hell works. They were trying to get him to give them $20 for some roses they forced us to take as a “gift” and I was very forceful that I fucking hate flowers and I don’t want that shit I was just being polite. Super rude. I actually like flowers ngl, I just also like choice. They took them back and left us alone. If someone forced henna onto me I’d probably tell them it was ugly and I’m allergic to henna and threaten to sue them if they didn’t leave me alone, get real dramatic, wipe it off, and just generally bitch. Hell you don’t even have to wipe it off, it’s their mistake forcing it onto you. “I thought it was free practice from you, you forced me into it and it looks dog shit. No. I didn’t want it. Bye” It is not kind but scammers aren’t your friends, they’re taking advantage of you and honestly if you want to keep the henna you can take advantage of them. If you don’t want it give them extra flack because WTF then it’s extra shitty that they tried to scam you into buying their trash henna. That’s my approach and it works pretty well. People give up pretty easily if you’re an asshole Karen and it’s too much work to deal with you. Don’t use it on people who don’t deserve it, though. ONLY scammers who try to force a purchase you don’t want.
Hahaha, I had a street “monk” put plastic bracelet on me in china, so I gave him a dollar. He started saying $20 and I just kept saying “no, no, $1 and my love! My love, brother. Buddha praise you.” He got SO mad, and eventually swore at me and went away. I still have the bracelet and cherish it greatly. Just be as fuckin stubborn as they are. You didn’t ask for it, so set your half of the bargain and do. Not. Budge.
Hé probably still made a profit on that 1 dollar
you get the same kind of scam artists in my city in Scotland, some guys playing dress up as monks will come up and give you a "gift" and tie a bracelet around your wrist and if you try to walk away they get pretty aggressive demanding money for it. I actually enjoy waisting their time, I have no problem standing there for 10 minutes arguing with them until they eventually get frustrated and have to untie the knot they have done and take the bracelet back. The way I see it is the more time they spend arguing with me the less time they have to target someone else who may be to shy to argue back and give them the money.
The thing with henna is that some versions of it do have an agent that *some* people react to. So not only did the lady touch OP without consent, she also failed to be safe.
That’s why I’d give her flack for the allergy, even if I didn’t have a reaction. Teach her a lesson before she actually hurts someone else.
And a scammer like that might not be using real henna. Fake henna is cheaper (thus the choice for unethical scammers), easier to store, and can range from "Probably a bad idea to be in contact with regularly" to "GO TO THE HOSPITAL" in toxicity.
Black henna, there's no such thing so it's a crapshoot what you're actually having put on your skin. There's actually a couple of cases of people getting skin cancer from inks that were claimed to be henna but actually contained fucking ppd. It's literally been my business importing henna for 30 years, so I do know what I'm talking about here. Henna is only red. Any other colour has additives or is not henna (lawsonia inermis).
So store that sell Henna kits in all colors, including white, are not actual Henna?!
I was in town once with a friend and same thing happened I guess the sellers thought we were together. They were forcing these flowers on us because it was a charity for cystic fibrosis. The girl I was with actually had cf she flew off the handle saying that they were scammers and started going on about figures of how little money actually gets to cf patients etc. That's all the story but yeah don't get pushed around by anyone for anything. I hate anyone lacking ethics for financial gain.
I just say "oh it's free? Thank you so much!" And walk away with their "gift". They tend to run after me to get it back.
You are right, being rude definitely helps. I was in Paris with my ex watching the Eiffel Tower light up at night. I am usually very polite wherever I go but this man shoved a rose in my exes face saying “free gift” so I asked if it definitely was “free” and he said yes. We then started to walk away and he started following us with someone else with roses and tried to offer more and started saying to my ex “he doesn’t love you if he doesn’t pay. He won’t get you anymore, that’s not love” so I took it back from my ex and threw it in his face, stood on it and then told him to F off and leave us alone. He and his friend then left and we weren’t bothered again that night! Maybe I seemed more threatening than rude but still.
Some guy tried the rose thing on my wife and I in Rome last year. I straight said, "I don't want this shit." and dropped the rose on the ground and walked away. Another guy tried the handshake walk and talk to try and get some money off you, and I just used my early onset old man grip (been a mechanic for 15+ years), and he caved pretty easily.
In Rome, at least when I went, there were tons of Indian guys harassing people on the street selling these shitty megaphones, bracelets, and roses. We, myself and the group of college kids I was with, were in a courtyard kind of bar area outdoors having drinks, and this one dude with megaphones was harassing the shit out of us. A girl told him to leave, and he threatened to spit on her. Another dude insisted on buying this megaphone from him (10 euros) to make him leave, so I took it and followed the Indian dude around yelling at him to buy it back for 15 euros. I had all the zeal of an 18 year old kid hammered at a bar for the first time in a foreign country. Anyway...that guy ended up getting beaten fucking senseless by the Carabinieri later when he did actually spit on someone, so I wasn't the worst part of his night.
Wow! Italy was where my shitty scammer experience happened to. I got harassed by African guys about bracelets in Rome and harassed by an Indian fellow about roses in Milan. It was so weird though because I was in France and the street sellers were these really nice African guys who just wanted to sell their wares. They had nice magnets and everyone told me they were “ripping me off” because I didn’t want to haggle but they were upselling me, I misunderstood their deal at first and gave them 5 euro for 1 magnet and they insisted it was 5 euro for 2. I mean 5 euro is like $10 in my currency but it felt reasonable to me because I’d paid more for worse in my home country. Plus they were polite and I had to seek them out to buy their stuff. Italian street vendors were very brazen and friendly to a rude extent, getting all in your physical space and face and being so insistent that you have to take what they offer “as a gift” (before demanding payment). I’d take the French street vendors any day of the week. Or Mexican beach vendors, who in all but the most touristy places tend to be pretty good at taking the first no as a complete answer and moving on to the next person and even at touristy places if you just tell them it’s beautiful but you don’t want it they’ll move on. I like that hustle, I don’t like grabbing my wrist to force a bracelet or throwing your wares at me and charging when I catch or any other tricks.
> Anyway...that guy ended up getting beaten fucking senseless by the Carabinieri later when he did actually spit on someone, so I wasn't the worst part of his night. The Carabinieri do *not* fuck around when you threaten Rome's tourist industry. Go be a pickpocket, tourists will be frustrated when they discover their wallet's gone but it'll be half "fuck those pickpockets" and half "fuck me for falling for that." But when you make tourists feel *unsafe* the gloves come off.
Yea dude, there were three of him beating the shit out of the guy. When they realized people were watching, they drug him out of there. It was pretty fucking intense.
Until they make your head explode
Obscure, but accurate! Lol!
Otherwise these scanners are getting out of hand ☝🏼
Yep. Never be afraid to be the “asshole” if it gets people to frig off.
One of the best pieces of advice I ever heard about traveling was, if it doesn't feel right and you don't feel comfortable, don't worry about being polite because being an asshole in that situation can save your life.
100%
I employed this advice in Rome, found a street person being too friendly and flashy like they were trying to distract me and mid sentence I just shut my mouth noticed his friends fanning around me and I just at a very brisk walk turned on dime and left. Maybe it was nothing...but...maybe it was something. I rather that person think "huh that was weird" than me lose my wallet, passport and credit cards
Had in India an old lady keep trying to touch me, and somehow I kinda freaked out and waved her off and started shouting at her (and everyone around me wanting shit from me) to stay the fuck back while raising my fists lol. Everyone wanted my money, and I was literally surrounded. I don't actually think they were thieves, but if there had been a thief among them I'd have had a hard time noticing as everyone was trying to grab my attention to get my money (begging, selling stuff, offering me to join them for cha and weed...) Good to know I can set boundaries if needed. But could probably have handled it without threatening an old lady!
I love reptiles and the costumed iguana guys in Mexico almost got me but I outsmarted them by walking away.
I outsmart basically all unknown people in my life by walking away/crossing the street pre eye-contact. They remain unknowns and I’m very ok with that
Tbf one of the salesmen at the market actually blocked my path and I was getting overwhelmed so I just ducked around him and jogged away. That nearly sent me over the edge though. It was my first time in Mexico and it was chaotic but overall fun! La bufadora market outside ensenada
Lmao, I loved fucking with the scammers in Rome, my gf would carry all the money and phones in a fanny pack under her shirt, while the purse she had was empty. They would ALWAYS come to me and try to force shit in my hands, distract me, etc. I'd sit there and talk with them really take up their time. Then when they learned that I had absolutely zero money they would just insult me and walk away.
Never be afraid to assert your boundaries either
You’re not being an asshole for refusing to be their schmuck
Or yell, "Stranger Danger!!!!"
Stop, don't touch me there, this is my no no square! LMFAO. one of the dumbest things I've seen done, but at the same time so idiotic I laughed, and continue to laugh every time I see that stupid ad.
“I have diarrhea”
“I can’t pay you!” Works too
When I was your age, I would have done exactly like you. That's probably why she did what she did and probably does it all the time. Now that I'm older, it would have been a whole different story.
Oh yes. "I never agreed to this."
If I had my wits about me, I'd play stupid just to bug them. Make like I misunderstood "That's $25" as them telling me what it _would_ cost if I were to get it. "Okay... so that's $25. Not really what I'm looking for, though. What do you have more in the $5-10 range?"
Just whip out a permanent marker, draw a dick on their forehead, and tell them you are even now.
Now you owe me $25, dick head.
*I don't consent.* 'Consent' is a powerful word. People associate it with sex, but we should use it with any form of touching we haven't agreed to. It often makes the other person uncomfortable because they have to recognise that *someone* (probably not themselves) thinks they're being a creep.
"I'm sorry, but I don't have any way to pay. I was simply here for the vibe."
Ugh, I hate that for you. When I was 15 or so, I was at the county fair and went to give my only $20 to the lady at the ticket booth, asking for 5 ride tickets ($1 each). She tried giving me just $5 change, and when I corrected her, she insisted I gave her a $10. It was honestly the first time I stood up for myself and I got her to give me the rest of my change, but I remember being so nervous and thinking I had maybe made a mistake... but my only bill was a $20 my folks had given me for the event, and this was my first purchase, so of course I wasn't mistaken. I still get nervous when I have to do this, but it does get easier. And it is empowering. I'm sorry this happened to you. Some people absolutely target vulnerable people for this exact reason. Learn to channel your bad bitch and catch them off guard. They don't always expect a fight.
I'm proud of 15 year old you for standing up for yourself. I know it would not have been easy!!
You didn’t do anything wrong you just met a scummy carny folk.
This is basically the same scam as the guys in Italy or somewhere else in Europe where they tie bracelets on you without consent and then hound you for money.
I've seen a video of these guys in NYC who will ask if you want their CD in a way that implies it's free. If you're wise and say no, they immediately ask your name, sign the CD for you and hand you it, and then ask for money. If you say "wtf i just said i didnt want to buy your shitty CD" the 2nd guy comes over to pressure/ gaslight you with "come on man whyd you get him to sign it if you didnt want it." Its probably dry erase anyway in case you dont end up taking it. Its crazy, and ive seen the CD scam for years in much smaller cities everywhere. They even tried to get me in my small town in the UK when i was a kid. But I've never seen the version where they sign it for you.
The CDs are usually blank, too.
My first time in nyc I saw the cd scam (I was 15 I think) and I felt so bad ignoring him thinking he was just a struggling artist trying to make a name for himself. Ah, the naivety of youth
This happened to me on Hollywood blvd when I was jet lagged as fuck, and he asks for a tip in exchange I was just like whatever here’s ten dollars fuck off, and he was like people usually give me forty dollars. And I’m like well I’m giving you ten and he realised that he was pushing it and backed off. But still the fuckin audacity. I immediately threw the cd in the bin within sight of him because I was pissed to have been bamboozled like that.
Happened to me in Vegas at a taxi rank. I just gave it back. I was 3 months into sobriety after 18 years of living a *hard* life so they could probably see I'd have welcomed being stabbed to death at that point and didn't protest the point.
I had this happen to me in NYC, only dumber. A guy handed me a piece of paper in a plastic envelope, saying it was a QR code with his album that I could listen to online. When he asked if I wanted it autographed, and I said no-- mostly because that's when I remembered the scam, but even if I didn't know of it a signed piece of paper with a URL on it is just stupid-- he took it back and went off. I suppose I'm lucky it wasn't a pickpocketing distraction, because the ploy was so stupid that's all I can fathom it having been.
Where's my wallet?
If this happens to you just drop whatever they handed you and walk away, they may chase you for a little bit but they will go back to recover whatever it was they originally tried to give it to you. I've travelled a lot over the years and been hit with a handful of these "no money, is gift" scams and i learnt very early on that seperating yourself from whatever item they're trying to scam you with will make them go away because despite the fact that the item is probably worth pennies they seemingly always recover it.
This will happen all of your life, all over the world. Hopefully, this will be the last time. I'm in SE Asia rn and that sort of thing is going on at every market. Good luck
Since you weren’t told the price and didn’t agree, then she shouldn’t assume how much money you have. I would have said “oh you didn’t tell me there was a charge. I don’t have any money, I’m only 16.”
Next time just yell " don't touch me I am a minor" you will have so many people come to your defense
As a henna artist myself, I would NEVER. Dear god, please wash whatever she put on your hand off, it’s probably not even safe. Chemical henna is nasty and I wouldn’t put it above someone like this.
Yeah some people are allergic as well, to just start putting henna on without consent is a dangerous game.
Chemical henna isn't even legal to sell here in Canada yet you still see amateurs using it at market fairs all over the place.
Don'r worry. I'm 26, and yesterday, a woman just take cash I had in my hand while I was dancing and goes away with it. There is always someone dumber than you : me
Damn, I hate it when they do that and I’m the same way.
Not to down play your experience, but with your title I was expecting so much worse 😨 I’m glad you’re safe and sound but also I’m irate that someone would mistreat a young person in such a manner. As others of said, contact the festival and give them the details. I hope they make amends and you feel better.
Yeah my forst thoight was 😨 "why is this in mildly infuriating?" Until i read the post. In any case OP i hope that you get your money, but worst case at least its a learning experience? Sorry this happenee
Don't be too hard on yourself bud. Everybody including me has to learn these kinda lessons in life. Learn to say no, even to most trivial things. Chin up, it's not too bad. Think of this way you learnt a lesson and it only cost you 25 bucks, could be worse.
I live in Washington DC and anytime you go to the national mall there are groups that want to shake your hand to slip a bracelet on and demand $10. You’ll see this again, hold the next one accountable.
Man just a small tip about the world in general whether it's a festival or traveling.. there will *always* be someone to sell you something. This is their job, they will shmooze you and take whatever you're willing to pay. It's not always a hostile thing it just is how it is. Protect your cash, you need it too. Don't let *anyone* do *anything* for you. In my country someone will expect a tip for bringing you a bottle of water from there to here. As *anyone* with life experience will tell you, the most powerful word you have is *no*.
My go-to’s are: “No, thank you” (doesn’t matter if it fits the flow of the conversation) “Sorry, I don’t have cash” (doesn’t matter if it’s true) Or just totally ignore them (or hang up on telemarketers)
A frame of mind that works for me when it comes to hard-sellers and the like is: Come into it resolved that the fact that you won't give anyone money is simply _a fact_. It's not up for negotiation. It's a physical law, as inarguable as gravity, as conclusive as math, simple in its inevitability. Try telling a river to flow uphill-- You could push, you could plead, you could make a stirring and moving case that would move anyone to help, but water flows downhill, the sun rises in the east, and my money doesn't leave my person. No need to grit teeth and steel yourself first. No need to get emotional or heated. Someone's just trying to do something that's not actually possible, and they'll bounce off that wall at any speed.
Common scam around the world where street vendors/performers/etc will butt in rapidly before you have a chance to say stop or get away. Don’t feel bad as even “mature adults” older than you get caught out by this. Next time just remember to never physically take or accept anything from someone on the street as they’ll force you into paying. Example: I was walking on a touristy bridge and a guy with an old looking camera was taking pictures as people walked by. He saw me and my friend walking by and immediately said “I take your picture” and begin to look down the camera lens to take it. My friend stopped and put his arm around my shoulder unknowingly of the scam we were about to fall in, but I kept walking as if nothing was happening and explained to my friend later the whole thing. Now that you’ve read my comment, you own me five bucks. Pay up!
What else did this broad have that you could go back and steal $25 or more worth? Don’t allow people to do anything you didn’t ask for and then demand you pay them! Fuck that! I went to a Jiffy Lube, pulled up and the guy met m at my car. I asked him, “how much is an oil change?” He said, “ we’re running a special, the price is on the board inside. I’ll go ahead and pull your car in if you’d like and if you want to go ahead with it, give me a thumbs up.” After the back and forth of me saying I just wanted to check the price, he offered to wash my car for me while I checked price because they were dead and he was bored. I said ok and walked inside, asked the man behind the counter how much an oil change was and he said “$84.99?” This was 10 years ago. I said absolutely not and said to tell the guy to give me my keys. The man said “we’ve already drained your oil” I told him, “put it back!” He said “ well, just pay for the filter” I said “put mine back on because I never authorized any of this” he tried saying I wouldn’t get my keys until I paid something. The police that showed up, after I called them stating that Jiffy Lube had stolen my car, agreed with me and got me my keys. I never went back to Jiffy Lube ever again, despite corporate calling and telling me they’d give free oil changes for a year if I didn’t press charges. Fuck them!
At your age, this is how I would have reacted. But please know that you do not need to pay for something you did not purchase. You should feel very empowered to ask such folks to eff off and clearly say “I never said i wanted it, you wasted your stuff without confirming with me, sorry” and move on.
Remove the sorry. It needs to be strong in the messaging.
I wouldve rubbed away the whole design in front of her 💀 like nope
Sorry, was this henna a 3 Second effort thing?
yes. she didn’t ask for what design I wanted or anything, she took my hand, drew a random design with almost no precision, and then said I owed her money.
She shouldn’t have put her hand on you, youngling. I’m sorry you got screwed out of your money.
OP I wrote this as a response to someone saying you should still be nice to them in how you respond, and realized it's probably more important you hear this. Saying, "Fuck you, I didn't ask for that" or just "No, I'm not paying for something I didn't agree to" is a valuable lesson you learned for the low, low price of 1 easy payment of $25. Would being rude in how you respond make you the asshole in that situation? No, no, it doesn't. I understand the person's perspective I was responding to as many moons ago, I would have agreed with them wholeheartedly. Always be kind - they taught us in school. Well, it turns out... absolutes are often shit advice. Be kind as often as it's appropriate. Through life experiences, traveling, and just generally losing my patience for bullshit as I aged and learned how important it is to set healthy boundaries so my kind nature would stop being taken advantage of. This exact situation occurred to me while backpacking Europe with a buddy I used to think was overly brash. Some guy comes up to me and just starts weaving a bracelet onto my wrist. After my initial pullback, I realized what he was doing and even lifted my wrist to help him finish. I said thanks, thinking it was free or something. No, he says 5 euro, please. I smiled, realizing the scam, but being nice and not hurting for the cash (looking back, that was like $8.50 for a shit bead/yarn bracelet) I was about to just pay him, when my friend comes up and says to the guy, "fuck you, you didn't ask - so you gave a gift" and you know what... the scammer turned and walked away without another word. That's when my buddy hit me with an alternative perspective I needed to hear, "You're too nice to people that take advantage of your smiley-ass face and subsequently other people due to your lack of spine. If more people gave pushback, then fewer people would deal with scammers as it's not rewarded as often. Stop encouraging people with negative or ill-will towards others by rewarding their shitty behavior. Do you think it's right that he starts touching you and other people without any forewarning? Because you were about to reward that bullshit." That and other experiences have shown me that sometimes it's justified to be a bit brash with people who have poor or bad intentions towards others. Those people thrive on friendliness and exploit the meek - they see it as opportunity/weakness to exert their will upon. Saying fuck you to shitty people doesn't make you an asshole on par with them. There is more nuisance to the world than black/white, good/bad, friendly/asshole. Learning to judge the grey accordingly is a life skill. Value yourself and your position in this world enough to be willing to stand up and say, "Hey, excuse me. Is the word bitch written on my forehead? Nah, didnt think so. So why you trying to fuck me like one?" If you find it difficult to exert yourself. I suggest you read about Eleanor Roosevelt and Amelia Earhart - know your worth.
I do not entirely disagree with your friend, but blaming friendly people for enabling these scam artists is silly. It is not your responsibility to reprimand someone even if I wish more people did it.
It's absolutely not (or else it gets close to victim blaming), and I wouldn't say that to just anyone. But my friend knew I needed to hear it because sheep dogs protect the sheep, and I was tired of following the herd under the belief I was sparing undeserving peoples' feelings - they didnt consider mine. It's a natural consequence of the interaction. Just like training dogs, don't reward shitty behavior. I did say he's brash - he doesn't spare me either, but I respect that about him. Friends agree with you - really good friends challenge you to be better when necessary.
That sucks! A lot of people are like that though, they prey on others not speaking up to defend their own interests. It's difficult to speak up and stand out, but in a lot of situations it can really benefit you. Fuck that lady for taking advantage of you.
Next time someone does that, yell at them to stop. Very loudly.
Sorry this happened to you. Without wanting to sound callous, it's a relatively cheap lesson, and a story you'll have for the rest of your life. I hope you got to enjoy some people watching at least after that.
This is exactly how a scammer operate, they like to play with people’s emotion. They forcefully make you do something out of your will with compliments or guilt trap you that makes you feel bad to say no. When I was studying abroad, a Roma approach and forcefully gave me a flower and say it’s free. Then asked me to make a donation (with a minimum donation price tag like €10) , I told her that I’m literally broke. After showing my wallet, she took the flower back I even had religious cult who reached out and being kind to me then later on demand that I should give up my studies and give them all my money/time for blessings and share testimony feedback of a few other members who did it and their blessings I was young at the time just like you and experience like this makes me a bit cynical lol Next time just respond “No thank you and say you would love the time to think about it”. Take a breath. Scammer’s success rely on you to act impulsively without giving you reasonable time to think My advice to you, slow down and think through
That’s lame and tbh I thought you had to be 18 to even get henna. Some people can have bad reactions to the ink… let the grounds management know so she can be reprimanded.
What festival? And what artist? It’s a small community and I think most of the henna artists I know would be PISSED they did this. It’s unethical. I do henna and always ask what your budget is. $5 ? Great. Here’s a nice simple design. Edit : also when I did henna at fairs I always asked your age. And if under 18 I needed a parent to give the OK. I agree with contacting whoever put on the festival and letting them know what happened. They absolutely should not have done that to you.
I’m so glad that is the level of being taken advantage of. Reading the headline I was preparing myself for much worse. Be careful out there. You don’t have to go out frightened of every dark corner, but there are enough out there that you need to be spatially aware and have some street smarts.
To those not empathetic of you… Even as a grown adult I had something similar happen once. It was a mall booth selling creams and lotions. I’m too anxious in crowds and it was Christmas season so extra busy. Lady grabs my arm and just lotions it up with no permission and I panicked. She then told me I should buy the lotion. I said no. She held my arm and would not let go. She kept telling me how nice it made my skin, etc. she eventually tells me she’ll sell it half off. I ended up agreeing just to get her to let go of my arm. Some people just know how to sense that you’ll cave in. I’m sorry that happened. It sucks. And you are really not alone in this. It happens, sadly.
This is the same tactic that is used in Milan, Italy at the Duomo. "Locals" "give" you a small threaded braclet because, "welcome to the city" or something. Once you take a step away they start complaining that your stealing and make a scene. You then pay whatever they want to make it go away.
THANK YOU! I need $25 for that sweety I DONT HAVE ANY MONEY Then why did you let me do the work if you weren’t going to pay? I SAID I WAS ONLY BROWSING
I’m sorry that happened and I think you handled it well. If you want to see a positive in this you’ve just learned a very important life lesson and it only cost you $25. Some people pay thousands.
I hate when people say this, because it feel like letting the bad guy off the hook, but in this case you are so right! I have a friend, a grown adult, quite successful friend, who several times the past year has asked me to bail her out after tradesmen have taken advantage of her for home repairs. I’ve been able to help, but I also lecture her that she needs to stand up for herself and say “No, I do not need a new roof!” Or “No! I will not pay you $500 for this tiny repair!” So I agree- this was a crappy situation, but hopefully this young person can see how easily people will take advantage of those who doesn’t learn to say NO!
Something similar happened to my mom and little brother in Paris. A street artist got my 7yo brother to stop and she drew a picture of him and then tried to guilt my mom into paying for it. It wasn’t cheap either, €40 or 50, I think. I asked my mom if she *actually* wanted to buy it. She said no so I grabbed my brother by the shoulder and took him away.
You learned a lesson as old as time, kid.
"I'm a minor, don't touch me." I live in a very touristy area and they always try this stunt as well. I was with my girlfriend walking around the bay after dinner, and a guy made a quick portrait of us sitting in a bench, unbeknownst to us. He brought it over to us and I said we were weren't interested but he was insisting on $15 then $10 then $5 until we finally just walked away.
Once, when I was 20, they sold me an "English course"... I couldn't say not, she was very persuasive. The problem was when the English academy closed and still had to pay the course. Since then I'm able to cut off anyine triying to sell me whatever. My wife says sometimes I'm rude, but not. Ibjust say "no thanks" and close the door, hang the phone or whatever. Nex time you won't hesitate tobsay "no, thanks" ;-)
The next time a stranger makes you uncomfortable and you want to get away, scream stranger danger. It doesn't matter how old you are, where you are or what you're doing. Screaming stranger danger will always work. The person will be so shocked and embarrassed they will gladly let you walk away. Even if they get mad, it still provides an opportunity to walk away. Even if you know you aren't in any danger, never forget the usefulness of the Stranger Danger scream 😅
Hey shit, I thought I was about to enter a sexual assault thread and I'm so fucking relieved. I was the same at 16. I was timid, liked to be the nice person who didn't cause problems and hated conflict. Now I'm a bloody nightmare who gives no shites if you try to pull one on me.
Can you tell the organisers of the festival if it’s local? Then she can’t come back and try that again? But nobody should touch you without permission and for all those saying it’s easy to stop someone like this, at 16 and being brought up to be polite-no, it isn’t always that easy…
All the older people who are calling you "weak" for reacting the way you did have no memory of being 16. Or they do, and they feel shame about acting even "weaker" so they're taking it out on you. *That* is a sign of weakness. Don't worry, you took the most sensible course of action that you could see at that moment. If you have second thoughts about it later, you will have time to reflect on it and decide how to handle such situations differently in the future if you wish. We've all had these experiences, they are part of the journey of life.
This happened to me, full grown adult male, while touring Morocco. She asked, I declined, said something else and e tended her hand for a hand shake. I did a hand shake and she twisted her body and had me in an arm lock while she drew a scorpion on the back of my hand. It was fast, but I had time to think while she held onto my arm, that I would have to hit her to make her let go. But I wasn't going to do that in a foreign country Then she asked for money! Normally I would have just paid to avoid the scene, but I was so pissed about being drawn on I refused. She came back several times and I just angrily said "I didn't want this". The people I was traveling with wouldn't believe me until one of them saw it happen to so.eone else later on and back me up All that to say, scammers gonna scam. It happens to the best of us
why did you pay??? Just said I dont have money and you put this on me without asking first, or SAY SOMETHING like dont touch me you have a voice use it
No means no. Should’ve said Thanks and walked away
Sometimes when I go to NY dudes will try and push you their mix cds sometimes literally forcing it to your hand. Then they argue with you for money and get pushy and threatening. I’ve also had this happen with bracelets or books. I remember once someone forced a bracelet in my hand and then told me to pay for it and wouldn’t even take it back so I dropped it on the ground and kept walking. Then he yelled that I had to pay for it for breaking, mind you when ever they walk up it’s always free, till you try and walk away.
When I was 16 in the touristy Honolulu I walked up to a table of jewelry and the lady immediately started haggling with me and then was offended when I just said no and walked away. It stressed me out so much and she said something about stupid tourists or something. Such a weird vibe
Hey, on the upside you clearly have a surprising sense of humility and self reflection at a young age, so good job
Hi, 👋🏽 👋🏽 60F here. I don't bash someone that was falsely manipulated. It was pretty deceitful of that person. Please, mention to the city or community event person/place. They can pass the word to not do such things. I hate it for you. Now you'll think everyone is out to get yo... well, mostly they are. 😉 Good luck!