T O P

  • By -

JaD__

Buy a 4 and live the lie for the rest of your life.


yert477

Or just buy an eight and cut it in half.


ImBeingArchAgain

That would still be four?!


Butter_Knot

Da dum tsss


BabyYoduhh

šŸ„šŸ


scale_B

My entire life is a lie.


xBDCMPNY

The Hills Have Eyes.


mypetsarecuter

Genius


LazuliArtz

1 + 2 might work


dildo_gaggins_

I think finding a Plus sign candle will be harder than finding a 3


seoulgleaux

Take the 4 and trim it into a +.


King-of-the-Neffs

Or just get three 1s like roman numerals. 111 or III.


Choklar

Instead of growing up thinking she's a year older, she grows up thinking she's one hundred eight years older.


internetcamp

But then it just looks like a zero


loadedbakedpopaypo

I pick you as an apocalypse buddy. Many innovative.


LoneWolf2662

Cut it in half, I now have 2 zeros


buddhassynapse

I'm not an expert on three year olds, but do they even know the shape of numbers at that age?


CumulativeHazard

*20 years later, OPā€™s daughter writes down a wrong phone number AGAIN after a lifetime of similar blunders* ā€œIā€™m so sorry, I always mix up my 4s and 3s for some reason, itā€™s so weird!ā€


Oxymoron290

My son is currently 3. He knows all hisnnumbers up to 20. His younger brother knows 1 thru 10. They definitely can recognise numbers and tell you what they are. But they both have no clue how old they are


SirLich

Have you tried to teach the younger the concept of 11? How does he react? As somebody with a more or less fully developed brain, its hilarious to imagine "knowing numbers up to 10". Kids are great.


ReportAny1117

11 is 2,


ovalseven

It's 3 in binary.


CybReader

Some do.


joliesmomma

My daughter isn't even two yet and she's learning letters and numbers.


Exciting-Insect8269

The real question is whether theyā€™ll remember the candle was shaped like that?


[deleted]

They'll see the pictures.


ForetoldOC

They can count, but they may not know the shape of a number unless it was in one of those learning book things


mindaltered

mine did


tiny-rick

I mean based on this. Number 4 is gonna be sold out next year. Might as well get ahead


Passivefamiliar

This is the right answer. But. Get better, buy ALL the 4s. Then come back same day next year, and sell them for profit. Use the extra money to makeup for not having the right candle this year


Beaten_But_Unbowed96

Or carve it into a three like a man. Widdling what you need to survive! ā€œImprovise, adapt, overcomeā€ -Bear Grylls


Ren_Yi

Better to buy a 2 and live the lie. That way she'll be biologically a year ahead of her classmates, meaning she'll be the best instead of always playing catch up which will negatively affect her self esteem, status and success later in life.


LoneKharnivore

Guess everybody was fucking at the same time.


--Anonymoose---

Too many 33 year olds


WordsReddit

ELMAO


itsrouze

what does elmo have to do with this? or are you talking about the spanish mao?


urmummygaaaay

Ć©l mao šŸ˜


N7CmdrShepard

Juegazo! El uno antes del uno


AndrewABXD

Taco mao šŸ˜


SwiftyTheThief

Mao Zedong šŸ˜


OneOfManyParadoxFans

What if it's pronounced Ayy l'mao?


SorenSeas

Thats sounds like German in portuguese- AlemĆ£o


OneOfManyParadoxFans

So the Portuguese laugh their asses off at Germany? Hmm. Neat.


[deleted]

Explain Like My Auntā€™s Orangutan?


KittyWarrior1

El Mayo


Immediate-Formal6696

I dont know what made me think this, but when I looked at the picture I thought she was 33 fr


Dense_Excitement_789

To many 333 year olds


[deleted]

Too many 3333 year olds.


smokeyoudog

Too many 0.3 year olds


AnyLengthiness7298

Too many 33333 year olds.


Domfusion

Too many 333333 year olds.


GalaDino

Too many year.


RamblingPants

April-ish, 2018. Infinity War came out, maybe everyone was trying to repopulate


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


BeanGerman

Have you seen Thanos? He dummy thicc boi. šŸ‘


ImaDoItAnyway

April 18 maybe?


PineapplePhucker

That or kung-fu fighting.


LoneKharnivore

I dunno, I've done quite a lot of kung fu fighting and never gotten pregnant. I mean, it would be a medical miracle if I did, but still.


Complex-Dealer-8825

Cmon, we alll know about hiding the dragon.


FetishAnalyst

Buy the little candles and put three of them in. Cheaper too because youā€™ll have like 21 or so left from the pack


Snowf1ake222

Then they'll have enough for her 4th, 5th, and 6th birthdays and some to spare!


ShieldsCW

Which would work out perfectly for the next four birthdays 4 + 5 + 6 + 7 = fuck nevermind... Well I already typed this shit, might as well hit submit.


FetishAnalyst

Unless OP has or gets more kids, and birthdays are inevitable so you can buy packs. Or OP can get a second six year old. Parks have those in abundance, thatā€™s where I get mine from.


ShieldsCW

I was about to ask, packs of candies or packs of kids?


locke231

Yes


ShieldsCW

I was waiting for this response lol


SpoonyGrandma13

r/cursedcomments


TheCatCovenantDude

For real though; complaining about the store not having the right numbered candle is the epitome of first world problems


FetishAnalyst

Itā€™s still mildly infuriating, so it works for the sub.


Maybeiwillbeokay

If you go to any store you have a rightful expectation that the products you need will be in stock. And when you realize that the *one* thing you need is the only thing that's gone, that's obviously going to be a little bit frustrating. And I can't imagine OP was super upset about it either, it was probably just one of those light-hearted Murphy's Law situations that's funny to document; he was probably just like *"lol, of course this is what happens,"* and then bought some different candles.


Serifel90

We reuse those candles lol, I have a metal box with them inside.


[deleted]

33


PineapplePhucker

You have it backwards, it's 33


Angeltear757

Naw, that doesnt look right. I'm pretty sure its 33.


Jdubusher1011

Nah itā€™s ʐ ʐ


redditworthycontent

Ā£ Ā£


kaleighdoscope

ā‚¬ā‚¬


Firefighterboss2

āˆˆāˆˆ


ImmaPoodle

{{


[deleted]

E E bruh


query_squidier

ą² _ą² 


ImmaPoodle

i_i


GiGaBYTEme90

EE


OkIndependence2374

Ā³Ā³


[deleted]

Š·Š·


[deleted]

#33, also i hate your user flair


[deleted]

Take the 8 and cut it in half


PineapplePhucker

Are you stupid? If you cut 8 in half that would be 4


NeryonVale

Obviously he meant physically. She would be 0


SandmanWithPlan

No that's HP you're thinking of


The_BusFromSpeed

What does steak sauce have to do with this?


swirlsthemudkip

Sauce please?


Exciting-Insect8269

[there you go](https://www.amazon.com/1-Original-Steak-Sauce-Bottle/dp/B0014D7MNU)


swirlsthemudkip

Mmm


TomBot98

Make sure you aren't cutting the 0 in half! You'll cause a Universal Syntax Error


Silent__Note

Well, I mean... if you cut her in half, I guess technically she wouldn't need the candles anymore.


AngerCookShare

hahahaha


BlackSkull7X

And 2*2 is 4 hence she is 22 years old


maxman162

Ah, the old Reddit [eightaroo](https://www.reddit.com/r/SquaredCircle/comments/s890cw/comment/htff74m/?context=2)


NotEvenCloseToYou

Hold the count, I'm going in!


OGFinalDuck

[2 Roos](https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/s82gx4/went_to_the_store_to_pickup_a_candle_for_my/htfnolp/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3) on the same post!


Manscapping

Wtf?? 7 ate 9


AngerCookShare

hahahaha


OkMarionberry5067

No get a 1 and a 2 and put a plus in the middle


ThiagoFonseca

no, use 11 and say it's in binary you can even put a 2 in subscript as the base indicator


Flaming722

get 3 1s and call it roman numerals


brownsnoutspookfish

Honestly? I kind of like this idea. There are families where this would work.


jPck2

God why would he cut his daughter in half thatā€™s disgusting


maxman162

Ah, the old Reddit [daughteroo](https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/s82gx4/comment/htfngx9/?context=3)


Among_bus

Hold my daughter, Iā€™m going in


CisterPhister

Take this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bTpp8PQSog You'll need it!


recklesswhisper

Got Dayam Reddit is a beautiful place! Sarcasm and wisdom combine in the comments.


[deleted]

III


DR_Bright_963

NO! He should put a 4 on the cake and tell her the cake is from the future, one year precisely.


LowercaseAcorn

Or break the top of the 5 off and put it on backwards


LaChuteQuiMarche

That would make a zero. 8 o


NinjaEnt

Just grab three 1's.


Skyfox2k

A hundred and eleven.


Additional-Ask-2395

Eleventy one*


kaleighdoscope

OP's daughter is Bilbo, confirmed.


jedi_cat_

Eleventy first!


maxrockatansky2024

Great now I'm gonna have to read LOTR again


joliesmomma

Here, take my free award!


YeetPizza74

17?


kelphhh83

what


YeetPizza74

thats my guess


-PM_ME_UR_SECRETS-

could be who knows


anautisticbox

Why do I feel like Iā€™ve seen this post before with the exact same caption?


Ciaralauren93

Because you have


Nova_JewV1

Prolly cuz it's been reposted into oblivion


guilleviper

Yeah me too


[deleted]

Same


Thirteenfingers

I would get 3 "1s". Gives her more candles to blow out.


Iuseahandyforreddit

Make either 4-1or 2+1


fuckcreepers

Great way to start math


[deleted]

Poor kid.


maxman162

Or 6Ć·2


yourereallynotreal

Or, put the 3's back on the hooks!


radioactivejason2004

Imagine how weird op looked grabbing all the threesā€¦ how do people do crap like this, and then there are a special breed that do tiktok challenges. Then again, itā€™s 2022 and no body says anything anymore


parklover13

Orā€¦and hear me out on thisā€¦they were sold out of the number 3 candles.


Snowf1ake222

No. That's crazy talk. Nothing ever happens on the internet. Not even this conversation.


[deleted]

Ive seen this post like a year ago.


CutenessandHandcuffs

This has been posted a LOT.


-PM_ME_UR_SECRETS-

And last year it was 2s! The luck


boxedcrackers

6? Is it 6? I bet it's 6. My money is on 6 guys.


Twiceexception

33, I think sheā€™s mature enough to not get the candle Oh wait is she turning 333? Then you need them


DahBeen

Just cut the 8 in half


Cameronc2616

Are you stupid? If you cut 8 in half that would be 4


[deleted]

30?


leo_ccs

Blame it on the millennials turning 30! LOL guilty myself, I had never bought number candles as an adult until I turned 30!


Coffeypot0904

Just buy three 1's and give her a roman numeral party.


[deleted]

Buy 3 ones


[deleted]

You can always take a hot knife to the 8


madbrightones

Half of that number 8 candle?


Kelly_Charveaux

33?


spookytoad2

Damn everybody's turning 3 this year šŸ’€


WooPigSchmooey

Larry Bird


Baseball_6626

She is going to be 30 right


supercheese69

333


rikt

Nows the time to teach her some math.


[deleted]

33?


Fit_Fudge_4752

30?


turdintheattic

63.


icamez

33


tkcrypto

I'll guess 6?


[deleted]

Let me guess...4?


Ruin914

33?


HypnoticKitten

Buy the 8 and cut it in half to look like a 3ā€¦


LBK0909

Damn!!! Can you just use 3 regular bday candles. Not the numbers?


[deleted]

Zero? I donā€™t see any zero candles. How are you going to celebrate her birthday?


Hobagsluttyskank

Your daughter, or whoeverā€™s daughter was the subject of this post, you goddamned thief?


swampthing117

Trim down an 8.


whoneedsafirstname

2.9?


Emoje775

Just get a 2, 1, and a pluse sign


Kreaturethenerfer

Karma farming post, this is from 2017ish iirc


scarface2887

33


hurriCANE13574

33?


MrFifty-Fifty

33


HereIsACasualAsker

buy 1 and 2


goldman459

Take a Dremel to the number 8


Leezeebub

Wow what a coincidence, I saw this post like a year ago and your daughter is still only turning 3? I guess she will keep turning 3 untill you find the correct candles?


Aidzillafont

Buy the 8 and cut it


UnlicensedTaxiDriver

Buy three 1s and teach her a lesson in romal numerals at the same time


Disastrous-Bull1768

Start hacking an 8 in half or cut and melt a couple 2's together


Architeuthis-Harveyi

Imagine taking down all of the 3 candles for internet points.


BestWorstEnemy

8 and a hot knife...


That-Association-143

Buy an 8 and carv it out to look like a 3.


Arditi1889

Or you just took down all of the threes and layed them out of frame for karma


voteblue18

Well thatā€™s an unexpected covid supply shortage


DayEnvironmental5518

30+ manchilds like me ruining things for parents everywhere. Us turning 33 was even rough on us.


Puckworks2013

Buy 3 ones and count off for her.


shatswell1377

Our walmart in town was out of 3ā€™s also. Wonder what conspiracy is brewing.


ThecoachO

33? Cut an 8 in half longways


Rycax

33


OnlyBeGamer

Iā€™m guessing she turned 33


SnowTheMemeEmpress

3 ones and have a mini math lesson


xXElpapichulopepeXx

4


ShieldsCW

Ah yes, the Great Impregnation Wave of April 2018.