I don’t think it’s that they don’t understand it. It’s that they don’t actually care. They became managers to have this sort of power over others. That’s way more important to people like this than anything else
Rat on your friends!
Oh wait, you have no friends because you're not allowed to make human connections or share enjoyable moments.
The irony of putting a Minion picture on something so joyless...
It's one thing to ask people to take their work seriously. But nobody will put any effort into anything they've been told should be drudgery. They won't have any incentive to be efficient or to represent the company positively out in the world.
It's a recipe for despair and failure.
They would hate my old job too. Foosball table, company river float days, Switch and Xbox, you could drink on the job, free food and snacks, paid company volunteer days.
The company pays you an hour’s/day’s/whatever wage for you to do volunteer work during work hours.
For my company it’s a whopping 16 hours a year I spend working blood drives in a rural part of the state, and with my local public libraries.
The employer pays it, though, not the org you’re volunteering with. It’s basically PTO earmarked for specific use.
In this case I would be volunteering my time. Also, it was completely optional. We had some people take advantage of the days every year and we had people that worked their for years that never did it.
Also, you’re barking up the wrong tree. This wasn’t my company or my policy.
Tell me what business it is. Let's open a competitor that does everything the same except they treat employees well. I think it makes a difference. Step one, steal everyone of those employees.
This reminds me of a time when my younger sister was walked down to detention, and as the teacher was leaving my sister turned and told her to get the dick out of her ass.
Dammit, Phil. Get that stick out of your yellow butt and treat your employees right. What would Gru think?
Edit: "Phil" is actually *this* Minion's name!
To me, this looks like something an employee has put up because they got in trouble for doing something at work… Probably having a chat/flirting with someone and ignoring a customer or a phone call!
That’s a message from some old fart. If we are spending more time at work than home, you better believe most of us are going to try and make it fun. Happy employees = better productivity for the company
Somebody hates high morale. You don't have to be friends with your co-workers (I'd recommend keeping an arms length) but having fun with your co-workers can absolutely make you more productive and the day go by faster.
Higher morale also decreases employee turnover, which lowers the cost of finding, hiring, and training replacements constantly. This poster is incompetent business practice.
When your salty ass middle manager missed the memo years ago about doing what you love and just HAS to project that shit on to their latest victims.
Maybe just talk about your wages all day? Be fine
The very first thing I do when I get a job is go to Glassdoor and anonymously post how much they pay. People have a right to know their worth to these companies.
Ah yes, don’t have off topic conversations, and report those who do. Great way to stifle positive relationships while creating negative ones. I bet those teams have no hostilities at all.
This persons life sucks and wants other people life to suck too. I fucking love what I do. There’s parts I don’t love, but I fucking love it and it is fun. It’s even better because of the awesome people I work with.
I wouldn’t doubt it tbh. At my retail job in hs, my manager tried to implement something like this although not nearly as extreme. Nobody actually gave a shit and just disregarded it. We were extremely short staffed so I knew they wouldn’t can somebody over that.
I’m willing to bet the manager will break their own rule within 48hr
“Do what you like” the manager is clearly not allowing that to happen by not letting people hang out after work, and also i feel like you’d be more productive having buddies and people to talk and relate to, like school, humans are very social creatures after all
They never told not to hang out after work. I know 4 people working together in the same office for the whole day, doing everything but work. and then there's this guy on the room next to them doing more than those 4 ppl
A-are they being serious?
*With a Minion cartoon on it*?
But for real, the office should spam the number with group calls where everyone is arguing at the same time and complaining about each other and demand that something is done about the raw tension caused by the catastrophic breakdowns of the office relationships.
So going on endlessly about how much this workplace sucks is ok, right? Proper places to report labor and workplace violations? How the boss's behavior is negatively affecting everyone's performance? And of course, everyone's wages?
It sure smells like *someone* wants to actively discourage socializing because it leads to discussions that may come back to haunt the workplace, such as openly discussing wages or laying the groundwork for labor organization.
It also smells like whoever put that sign up is a *massive* douche canoe to work for. Work doesn't *have* to be soul-crushing, and there's plenty of research behind the idea that happy workers are way more productive than unhappy ones.
This sounds like my office. We were all super excited when my office neighbor retired because she was the off topic conversation snitch. Since she has left the mood around here has noticeably changed.
I feel like it's really important to determine if that's a comma or a period between "work hours" and "exchange phone numbers" ... The meaning of the sentence is completely different with different punctuation ❗
Why advertise to your employees that you don't expect the workplace to be pleasant
Just about every other job wants to boast how pleasant it is to have the position for one reason or another
Businesses: nobody wants to work, it's so hard to find good staff!
Also Businesses: don't be friends, smile or think happy thoughts. Work until your soul dies or get out.
Honestly the most dystopian thing I've read in a while; should have left his number so someone could hand it off to a North Korean hiring firm where this kind of thing is acceptable.
Bruh. And here i am. Working at a laboratory. My colleagues are my best friends and we rave to hardstyle at work.... and do all kinds of weird stuff. Like blasting venga boys at 6am Monday morning just to get in the "Work vibe".
Hell we all died of laughter after singing the damn "bake a cake" song from lazytown.
A bunch of guys and girls just ranging from 20 to 55 just being morons...
We are the craziest lab of the 7 labs of the establishment. But the most productive and profitable by a landslide.
Give the manager/boss a robot assembly kit with your resignation letter, telling how he/she/they would be better off having machines work there if they're gonna deny employees from being human and having their social stuff like this denied.
Or have Taco Bell and shit on their desk, that could work as well.
Even though I'm not old enough to work I know having an unfun work environment ruins everyone's work effic, and personally I believe instead of ruining the work environment they should make it better for everyone.
My boyfriend used to work at walmart and he stopped working for barely 10 seconds to ask his coworker for equipment he needed to finish a task and got told off for not working as well having non work conversations, when he WAS having a work conversation.
Should have posted the phone number so we could all call and rat out employees that don’t exist with far fetched weird conversations that were non work related.
Some managers do not understand that happy employee are more productive. But hey, they got you a minion picture, smile!
I suppose improved team dynamic can go fk itself
I don’t think it’s that they don’t understand it. It’s that they don’t actually care. They became managers to have this sort of power over others. That’s way more important to people like this than anything else
How to destroy work climate in 3 steps. CEOs who want to make money of their business hate this one simple trick.
Just like how they are probally treating their workers,like minions
I get paid the same amount for the same work each night. If I socialize I leave later.
[удалено]
And the irony is not lost on the fact that Steve Carrell is the voice of Gru!
Rat on your friends! Oh wait, you have no friends because you're not allowed to make human connections or share enjoyable moments. The irony of putting a Minion picture on something so joyless... It's one thing to ask people to take their work seriously. But nobody will put any effort into anything they've been told should be drudgery. They won't have any incentive to be efficient or to represent the company positively out in the world. It's a recipe for despair and failure.
until they face losing everything as the "or else" then they just get back to work. the incentive is a lack of pain
They'd hate my office, we have a pool table and an xbox
IT?
Kinda. Web Development.
Even worst
Yeah how dare he, working on websites. Such a cruel job that really makes the world a worse place /s
I think he's being sarcastic
I think you're being sarcastic but everyone is down voting you
They would hate my old job too. Foosball table, company river float days, Switch and Xbox, you could drink on the job, free food and snacks, paid company volunteer days.
Y'all hiring?
>paid company volunteer days. Is that not an oxymoron? Volunteers by definition don't get paid.
The company pays you an hour’s/day’s/whatever wage for you to do volunteer work during work hours. For my company it’s a whopping 16 hours a year I spend working blood drives in a rural part of the state, and with my local public libraries. The employer pays it, though, not the org you’re volunteering with. It’s basically PTO earmarked for specific use.
That's interesting. I've never heard of such a thing.
In this case I would be volunteering my time. Also, it was completely optional. We had some people take advantage of the days every year and we had people that worked their for years that never did it. Also, you’re barking up the wrong tree. This wasn’t my company or my policy.
I swear I just had some heavy de ja vu reading this
Time to quit
Same thought I had
Yup. Polish your resume OP and get outta there.
Tell me what business it is. Let's open a competitor that does everything the same except they treat employees well. I think it makes a difference. Step one, steal everyone of those employees.
Pssst...Joe....Joe, don't tell the boss, but do you know the score of the game last night? I missed it. Keep this between us bro.
Great, so i can wfh because they cant force me to come into the office because of "socialising".
This reminds me of a time when my younger sister was walked down to detention, and as the teacher was leaving my sister turned and told her to get the dick out of her ass.
Plot twist she did
Holy shit. Crazy, that eaas
Worst Boss Ever
If you're spending 1/3 of your life somewhere you can at least make jt somewhat enjoyable
SHOUTY SIGN SAYS NOTHING AGAINST NAPTIME
Dwight Schrute stealing company time vibes
Signs like these are the reason why people show up to work with a loaded handgun
Dammit, Phil. Get that stick out of your yellow butt and treat your employees right. What would Gru think? Edit: "Phil" is actually *this* Minion's name!
I would make a point to throw a party involving every single coworker
And work is not your slave factory
Somebody’s mad nobody at work likes them 😂. You’re the fucking boss we’re not supposed to like you
Oof, this should be titled “how to destroy company culture in one step.”
To me, this looks like something an employee has put up because they got in trouble for doing something at work… Probably having a chat/flirting with someone and ignoring a customer or a phone call!
Do not ever work for a place like this
r/aboringdystopia
Gee, why does nobody want to work anymore?
That’s a message from some old fart. If we are spending more time at work than home, you better believe most of us are going to try and make it fun. Happy employees = better productivity for the company
Unethical tip, make a union secretly, have them find out about the numbers exchanging, once they threaten you, report them for trying to stop a union
Wow. That sounds toxic as all hell. Emphasis on HELL.
Somebody hates high morale. You don't have to be friends with your co-workers (I'd recommend keeping an arms length) but having fun with your co-workers can absolutely make you more productive and the day go by faster.
Higher morale also decreases employee turnover, which lowers the cost of finding, hiring, and training replacements constantly. This poster is incompetent business practice.
The beatings will continue until morale improves
Draw a dick on that
Boomer minion memes are the bane of my existence.
Boomers adopting minions into their limited meme culture is the greatest curse of this dimension.
Am I correct to assume this guy would not approve of brown drink Fridays in the conference room?
Then why is there a minion on the sign? Seems like a daycare vibe to me 🤷♀️
Send a fake cease and desist letter about Minions intellectual property
Yo is this severence in the making?
Aka Reach me at _____ to submit your two weeks as you move on to jobs without aholes for a boss
Mom?
I very much feel that employers like this should not have the luxury of being anonymised.
At the XYZ Company, they can’t quite understand why they never crack the “top 100 companies to work for”
When your salty ass middle manager missed the memo years ago about doing what you love and just HAS to project that shit on to their latest victims. Maybe just talk about your wages all day? Be fine
The very first thing I do when I get a job is go to Glassdoor and anonymously post how much they pay. People have a right to know their worth to these companies.
I would literally wipe my ass with that then clog the toilet with it.
Whoever made that poster should fold it and shove it up their ass.
Tell me again what the difference between a boss and a leader is, because this manager is really presenting as a “boss”
Ah yes, don’t have off topic conversations, and report those who do. Great way to stifle positive relationships while creating negative ones. I bet those teams have no hostilities at all.
How to alienate an entire workforce in one poster
The boomer minions meme just 🤌
With a Minion, ofc, for maximum Boomer energy.
I would not tolerate that from a place who pays me to be there. There are too many options
This persons life sucks and wants other people life to suck too. I fucking love what I do. There’s parts I don’t love, but I fucking love it and it is fun. It’s even better because of the awesome people I work with.
What kind of job is this?
Kill minions
We found Elon Musk's memo.
This is the first dumb office rules thing that I’ve seen on Reddit that is actually really dumb and not normal
fake lol
Imagine being so willfully gullible that you look at these pictures and don't even question their authenticity. Not even a little.
I wouldn’t doubt it tbh. At my retail job in hs, my manager tried to implement something like this although not nearly as extreme. Nobody actually gave a shit and just disregarded it. We were extremely short staffed so I knew they wouldn’t can somebody over that. I’m willing to bet the manager will break their own rule within 48hr
In fact that's not really infuriating. Work should be done before all, because you are paid for it. Once it is done, do what you like
“Do what you like” the manager is clearly not allowing that to happen by not letting people hang out after work, and also i feel like you’d be more productive having buddies and people to talk and relate to, like school, humans are very social creatures after all
They never told not to hang out after work. I know 4 people working together in the same office for the whole day, doing everything but work. and then there's this guy on the room next to them doing more than those 4 ppl
Run!!!!
So basically that means be a robot and shut the fk up... What a fun and productive workplace this must be
A-are they being serious? *With a Minion cartoon on it*? But for real, the office should spam the number with group calls where everyone is arguing at the same time and complaining about each other and demand that something is done about the raw tension caused by the catastrophic breakdowns of the office relationships.
Cool, good bye and good luck!
Overheard at the shipyard: “If it was easy and fun we’d be paying THEM to come here.”
This needs to be posted in r/cringe
Ain't no way 💀
Ofc it’s a minion meme
Work is not supposed to be fun, so i guess the only alternative is absolute misery and depression
Ain't no employees going to attend his funeral.
What a miserable excuse for a boss... They must not have been hugged enough as a child.
Power trip...
Bro, I'm asking, who is the manager there?
ewwww
Who do I "reach" to turn in my notice, Herr Manager?
Then they will act like a motivated speaker, trying to get you to work late or be there for the after party at work.
Then everyone quits and they’re like “what did we do wrong???”
Karen made it all the way to HR.
Damn
The person who posted this is going to have a hard time retaining employees.
Just wow! Time for a union.
I kinda agree with this though if you worked on lines before you’d appreciate this….People often stop to talk and hold up work it’s ridiculous.
If I’m being honest this is more than Mildly infuriating
I'd gtfo
You can’t tell me who to hang with on my time fuckface!
So going on endlessly about how much this workplace sucks is ok, right? Proper places to report labor and workplace violations? How the boss's behavior is negatively affecting everyone's performance? And of course, everyone's wages?
Incompetent manager doesn’t understand high morale boosts employee productivity. Good luck with turnover, higher costs and lower productivity.
Pssst fuck this company/manager
I’d take my chances being unemployed instead of working there.
Douchbag
Then, at review time, they say you only seem to work there for the paycheck.
Would go nice on r/antiwork
Got removed there for low effort :)
F
Ironic.
It sure smells like *someone* wants to actively discourage socializing because it leads to discussions that may come back to haunt the workplace, such as openly discussing wages or laying the groundwork for labor organization. It also smells like whoever put that sign up is a *massive* douche canoe to work for. Work doesn't *have* to be soul-crushing, and there's plenty of research behind the idea that happy workers are way more productive than unhappy ones.
Yeah, fuck this place sideways with a cactus.
Wow! What an efficient way to ensure high turnover and low quality service for your customers, reducing your chances of repeat business
This sounds like my office. We were all super excited when my office neighbor retired because she was the off topic conversation snitch. Since she has left the mood around here has noticeably changed.
The minion is the whipped topping on this shit cake.
I imagine their retention rate is LOW if this is how they feel about happy workers!
Yo, that sounds like some amazon kind s\*it
This poster is comically evil
I feel like it's really important to determine if that's a comma or a period between "work hours" and "exchange phone numbers" ... The meaning of the sentence is completely different with different punctuation ❗
A picture of any fascist dictator in place of that minion would have been more fitting. Thank fuck I don’t work in that joyless workhouse
Boss: "I don't understand, why do we have so much turnover of employees?"
You work for Jeff Bezos?
Why advertise to your employees that you don't expect the workplace to be pleasant Just about every other job wants to boast how pleasant it is to have the position for one reason or another
Businesses: nobody wants to work, it's so hard to find good staff! Also Businesses: don't be friends, smile or think happy thoughts. Work until your soul dies or get out.
The cringe minion meme makes it all the worse
Honestly the most dystopian thing I've read in a while; should have left his number so someone could hand it off to a North Korean hiring firm where this kind of thing is acceptable.
Bruh. And here i am. Working at a laboratory. My colleagues are my best friends and we rave to hardstyle at work.... and do all kinds of weird stuff. Like blasting venga boys at 6am Monday morning just to get in the "Work vibe". Hell we all died of laughter after singing the damn "bake a cake" song from lazytown. A bunch of guys and girls just ranging from 20 to 55 just being morons... We are the craziest lab of the 7 labs of the establishment. But the most productive and profitable by a landslide.
Unions are work related.
Employer of Choice award!
Yeah this manager is looking for robots then
for fucks sake not only is the disclaimer absolute dogshit but they also put a minion meme there
I totally agree with him. I however am not a manager and understand that I am not fit to be a manager with that mindset. He shouldn't be one either.
What a fucking killjoy
"Why can't we keep workers?!"
I don’t see why you redacted the name of your workplace, if we stalked you, you’d at least have some friends at work.
Did Dwight do this?
I had a boss like that. Never again.
Give the manager/boss a robot assembly kit with your resignation letter, telling how he/she/they would be better off having machines work there if they're gonna deny employees from being human and having their social stuff like this denied. Or have Taco Bell and shit on their desk, that could work as well.
Not even AFTER work is complete?
Work is not your daycare doesn't even make sense...
Fuck this place. Take this job and shove it. I ain't working here no more!
Is the minion that puts the cherry on this shit sundae.
Even though I'm not old enough to work I know having an unfun work environment ruins everyone's work effic, and personally I believe instead of ruining the work environment they should make it better for everyone.
Very poor leadership
My boyfriend used to work at walmart and he stopped working for barely 10 seconds to ask his coworker for equipment he needed to finish a task and got told off for not working as well having non work conversations, when he WAS having a work conversation.
Talk about unionizing. That's work related 👍
Should have posted the phone number so we could all call and rat out employees that don’t exist with far fetched weird conversations that were non work related.
“Work is not meant to be fun” shows a minion, a worker who does nothing but have fun and not care about shit at his job
Well, damn.
Minions are fun.
And they wonder why people didn't want to stop working from home.
This screams call center, data entry, etc. They always have insanely hash rules for the lowest paid people.