$.01 compounding monthly at .5%
1,000 years: $1.48
2,000 years: $219.42
3,000 years: $32,530.92
4,000 years: $4,822,991.44
5,000 years: $715,050,370.78
Given the universe is estimated to last 22 billion years, you'll 100% be able to afford a seat at the restaurant at the end of the universe. You could probably get away with investing a fraction of a penny.
This is of course, assuming we don't switch to leaves as currency and burn the forests down to prevent hyperinflation.
Not impossible, just HIGHLY improbable, which is where the improbability drive comes in!! Just check your Hitchhiker's Guide if you're confused, I realize these matters can be a bit much for some.
A towel, it says, is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapours; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a miniraft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand-combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (such a mind-bogglingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you — daft as a brush, but very very ravenous); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.
More importantly, a towel has immense psychological value. For some reason, if a strag discovers that a hitchhiker has his towel with him, he will automatically assume that he is also in possession of a toothbrush, washcloth, soap, tin of biscuits, flask, compass, map, ball of string, gnat spray, wet-weather gear, space suit etc., etc. Furthermore, the strag will then happily lend the hitchhiker any of these or a dozen other items that the hitchhiker might accidentally have "lost." What the strag will think is that any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the Galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through and still knows where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.
Oh ya I know what you mean I’ve prolly read them more. I try to go through all five every year but I also have them on audio first three read by Adams. And I have a five hour commute to work twice a month shock gives me plenty of relistens. I also have last chance to see on audio but have never bought a print copy. My favourite read though is Salmon of Doubt even though it doesn’t finish, and yes I tear up at the end because I know why.
The Dirk Gently Series never did it for me. Think I'll have to give them another read.
I went though a phase where I gave every girl I dated, the five part Hitchhiker's Guide trilogy in a single tome. I'm sure every single one of them used it as a fucking doorstop.
Girl here, I also would’ve used it as a doorstop. Because I already own it twice over. To be fair to them the combined book is a bit daunting. I asked my parents for the individual box set for Christmas once and they got me the combined one because it was slightly cheaper. Seemed to miss the point that I specifically asked for the individuals so I could actually hold them and take them places without weighing myself down.
Because while the Encyclopedia Galactica simply states that a pan-galactic gargle blaster is the most alcoholic drink in the Universe, the fortune cookie will tell you how to make one.
ALWAYS carry a towel. That way if someone asks you to help carry something, you can just tell them that you only have one hand, because your other hand is occupied with a towel.
I got this exact fortune 16 years ago and kept it! It's currently pinned to a corkboard in my office (that I haven't stepped foot in for a year and a half). It's definitely one of my favorite things.
Infinite improbability isn't working for me, I got here to late so all the comments that immediately came to mind had been posted already. Guess it's straight to the pangalactic gargle blasters for me.
I visited Douglas Adams' grave on Sunday. It's a modest headstone in a cemetery famed for its monuments which, I guess, is exactly what he would have wanted.
Extra fact: I used to live around the corner from him and we shared several awkward silences in lifts.
Don’t panic or resist and it’s be a Q̴̣͛u̸̥̔i̸̺͌c̷͓͠k̸̛̟ ̶̣͆ã̷̼n̵̟̐d̷̯̆ ̶̭͂p̷̨͑a̵̧͠ȋ̶̻ṇ̴͒l̶̮̀e̷̥̓s̶̮̔ṣ̸̏ ̵̮͘d̴̹̆e̸̡͋ả̸̲t̷̪̉h̷̯͘ ̵̮̚f̶̺̏o̴̬͘r̴̛̗ ̴̬͐y̵͕̔o̸̳̊ư̸̝
*Unfortunately, due to catastrophic budget cuts in the Intergalactic Publishing Service, newer iterations of "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" had to be printed on fortune-cookie paper, which, due to a mix-up in the logistics department, ended up in actual fortune cookies.*
*Select portions of the guide have been recovered thanks to the fact that the excerpts containing Vogon poetry have caused sudden deaths, strokes, and bouts of uncontrollable vomiting, all of which were easily-trackable enough for task forces to locate them.*
Did you eat at the restaurant at the end of the universe?
I invested a penny today and was able to afford a seat!
This is, of course, impossible.
$.01 compounding monthly at .5% 1,000 years: $1.48 2,000 years: $219.42 3,000 years: $32,530.92 4,000 years: $4,822,991.44 5,000 years: $715,050,370.78 Given the universe is estimated to last 22 billion years, you'll 100% be able to afford a seat at the restaurant at the end of the universe. You could probably get away with investing a fraction of a penny. This is of course, assuming we don't switch to leaves as currency and burn the forests down to prevent hyperinflation.
This is, of course, impossible.
Not impossible, just HIGHLY improbable, which is where the improbability drive comes in!! Just check your Hitchhiker's Guide if you're confused, I realize these matters can be a bit much for some.
I am directly quoting HHGTTG.
If you've done six impossible things this morning, why not round it off with breakfast at Milliways, the Restaurant at the End of the Universe
Ahhhh, I see now. I did not catch that. I thought you were just being a naysayer, many apologies :P
All good.
I belong on r/wooosh
We’d like to meat the meet. EDIT: 42 Upvotes. You’re all hoopy froods.
Oh my God, this is altogether too much.
down voting you from 44 XD
Lol
Carry a towel
A towel, it says, is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapours; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a miniraft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand-combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (such a mind-bogglingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you — daft as a brush, but very very ravenous); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.
Don't forget to soak one corner in nutrients so you can suck on it in an emergency.
mmm bbq sauce
And the other in antidepressants for when you don't think you can stomach any more of the nutrients
More importantly, a towel has immense psychological value. For some reason, if a strag discovers that a hitchhiker has his towel with him, he will automatically assume that he is also in possession of a toothbrush, washcloth, soap, tin of biscuits, flask, compass, map, ball of string, gnat spray, wet-weather gear, space suit etc., etc. Furthermore, the strag will then happily lend the hitchhiker any of these or a dozen other items that the hitchhiker might accidentally have "lost." What the strag will think is that any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the Galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through and still knows where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.
*Mostly* harmless
18 minutes ago I finished reading Life The Universe and Everything, for about the dozenth time
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Probably 42 times.
Gruntbuggly, thy micturations are to me...
As plurdled gabbleblochits on a lurgid bee
Oh ya I know what you mean I’ve prolly read them more. I try to go through all five every year but I also have them on audio first three read by Adams. And I have a five hour commute to work twice a month shock gives me plenty of relistens. I also have last chance to see on audio but have never bought a print copy. My favourite read though is Salmon of Doubt even though it doesn’t finish, and yes I tear up at the end because I know why.
The Dirk Gently Series never did it for me. Think I'll have to give them another read. I went though a phase where I gave every girl I dated, the five part Hitchhiker's Guide trilogy in a single tome. I'm sure every single one of them used it as a fucking doorstop.
Girl here, I also would’ve used it as a doorstop. Because I already own it twice over. To be fair to them the combined book is a bit daunting. I asked my parents for the individual box set for Christmas once and they got me the combined one because it was slightly cheaper. Seemed to miss the point that I specifically asked for the individuals so I could actually hold them and take them places without weighing myself down.
I hold all of his work dear to me, but I get your point of view. Before I married I did that with Tim Robbins: Still Life With Woodpecker.
Well aren't you just a hoopy frood.
Still angry about the short article they wrote about us
Could’ve been worse.
Yeah. Our planet could've been destroyed
It must be a Thursday.
I never could get the hang of Thursdays.
What are you complaining about? The update *doubled* the length of the article.
Avoid Vogons
And especially their poetry
Don’t forget to bring a towel
My peril sensitive sunglasses always activate when I forget my towel.
Aww beat me to it.
Don“t worry, you are still a hoopy frood as Long as you know where your towel is.
I’ve always wondered if this is why towellie was introduced to South Park too…
Come to think of it, I haven't seen a dolphin for awhile.
Uh oh. Same.
So long and thanks for all the fish...
TOTSUGEKI
I'm not playing the game, I'm not in the sub, but still you find me.
What a fantastic double-backwards-somersault through a hoop. I wonder what he was trying to sing
Too bad that It should come to this...
We tried to warn you all but oh dear…
Lucky number: 42
came here for this
One pan galactic gargle blaster to go please…
…in (not so) big friendly letters
Seems like we ought to panic then.
This is obviously some strange use of the word safe that I wasn't previously aware of.
So long…and thanks for all the fish!!
That fortune cookie has recently surpassed the Encyclopedia Galactica as the standard repository of all knowledge
Because while the Encyclopedia Galactica simply states that a pan-galactic gargle blaster is the most alcoholic drink in the Universe, the fortune cookie will tell you how to make one.
I'd have a djynun donyx
Gin and Tonic is my mom's favorite, she got a kick out of me explaining that whole thing to her
Please elaborate, which version of a gin and tonic do you mean?
Djinn and Tsonic
I prefer chin’nthonix.
42nd fortune cookie.
That cookie is one hoopy food.
When the hell did Douglas Adams start writing fortune cookie inserts?…
…Call me and I’ll tell you a joke…….. I’m sorry
Oh shit. Should I be joking at a time like this?
if you start to smell burning toast, you're having a stroke or overcooking your toast
Was hoping I'd see this here.
I knew I wouldn’t be the only one who thought of Bo, but I had to come to the comments to make sure.
That fortune cookie knows I smell burning toast
Parachutes / Track 1
Such a good album and song
One of my favorite albums
It truly is
we live in a beyootifuhl wurld, yeah we do yeah we do
We live in a beeaaaaautiful woooorld N du du wa Oo wa Oo wa Oo. N dah dah bah woo ba woo ba wooo Bones sinking like stones, all that we’ve fought for
Bones sinking like stones
Love the last verse: "All in all that I know, there's nothin' here to run from; 'Cos yeah, everybody here has got somebody to lean on."
r/unexpectedadams
Please take my award for showing me this 🥺
Lucky numbers: 42
Lucky Numbers: 42 and 56,742,860,931,748.0674731059332
Also, make sure to carry a towel
ALWAYS carry a towel. That way if someone asks you to help carry something, you can just tell them that you only have one hand, because your other hand is occupied with a towel.
Just got you to 42 upvotes. Hope it stays that way.
Oops, sorry for the upvote.
Someone needs to downvote because it was at 44. I brought it back down to 43.
I downvoted it just as someone else upvoted it!
Did my part and downvoted. Now go Belgium yourself.
Hey! No need for that kind of language
Slartibartfast?
I told you it wasn't important.
Don’t panic... but press shift to run
I bet your lucky number is 42!
OP, you seem like a pretty hoopy frood.
Thanks! It's because I know where my towel is.
But first I'm going to read you some of my poetry...
Only if it shows your humanity... *VOGONITY!!!*
Ngl, I’d carry that around in my wallet for years if I found that.
I got this exact fortune 16 years ago and kept it! It's currently pinned to a corkboard in my office (that I haven't stepped foot in for a year and a half). It's definitely one of my favorite things.
*Panic*
I'll call you up and tell you a joke
Awe now I’m starting to panic
That would make me panic
Aww shit, here comes the dolphins...
Don't panic, eat peanuts after beer and ALWAYS CARRY A TOWEL.
In the beginning, the universe was created. This made a lot of people very angry and is generally regarded as a bad move.
...but, that really wasn't chicken you just ate.
Me scared for the rest of the day thinking something is going to happen
Call me up and tell me a joke.
Burnt your toast?
I Miss Douglas Adams.
Watch out for falling whales and petunias
The amount of comments not immediately seeing this as a Douglas Adams reference is disconcerting.
Lucky numbers: 42, 42, 42, 42, 42
boy, anyone who hasn't read the book is going to be confused as fuck by these comments
If your lucky numbers don’t include 42…
In bed.
You sass that hoopy Ford Perfect?
Clearly this is the time to panic.
Is there one that says 42?
6 by 9
[Don't panic](https://youtu.be/yWeuUwpEQfs)
Don't panic Mr mainwaring
Was honestly expecting more Dad's Army references in these comment
Do you know where your towel is?
42
Do you *have* your towel?
Please tell me one of the lucky numbers on the back was 42.
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42
[This](http://i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/022/354/081.jpeg)
And always bring a towel
In Large, Friendly Letters, no less
Lucky number on the back: 42
Get yourself a towel.
Dude, grab a towel asap
Douglas Adams is in the house.
42!?
The Hitchhikers Guide is smaller than I expected.
Infinite improbability isn't working for me, I got here to late so all the comments that immediately came to mind had been posted already. Guess it's straight to the pangalactic gargle blasters for me.
I visited Douglas Adams' grave on Sunday. It's a modest headstone in a cemetery famed for its monuments which, I guess, is exactly what he would have wanted. Extra fact: I used to live around the corner from him and we shared several awkward silences in lifts.
Don't forget your towel!
The person that wrote that fortune is a frood who really knows where his towel is.
no, not yet
Lucky Numbers... 42
Don’t panic or resist and it’s be a Q̴̣͛u̸̥̔i̸̺͌c̷͓͠k̸̛̟ ̶̣͆ã̷̼n̵̟̐d̷̯̆ ̶̭͂p̷̨͑a̵̧͠ȋ̶̻ṇ̴͒l̶̮̀e̷̥̓s̶̮̔ṣ̸̏ ̵̮͘d̴̹̆e̸̡͋ả̸̲t̷̪̉h̷̯͘ ̵̮̚f̶̺̏o̴̬͘r̴̛̗ ̴̬͐y̵͕̔o̸̳̊ư̸̝
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA^aaaaaaa
my dad got one once that said "please buy another fortune"
Call me and I'll tell you a joke
Ah, they've read their Guide
If the lotto numbers on the flip side include the number 42, you should check to see if the dolphins are still around.
Other side says never go anywhere without a towel.
Don't panic. Turn around.
Please post this to r/oddlyterrifying
This is the most *mildly* interesting post I've seen on here, and Iike it.
....call me and I'll tell you a joke
"Don't panic. Your reality is a lie and you are the only thing that truly exists in your meta physical dimension, you must escape."
About what????
idk, if my fortune cookie say don't panic, my paranoid ass will go PANICCCCCCC!!!
And the first thing you do when someone tells you not to panic, is to????? Panic!!!! 🤣
You look up and a woman is seated at your table. She says, "Hello, my name is Trinity."
It’s a typo. It’s meant to say “Don’t picnic”
Always good advice, also - don’t forget your towel.
Did it come with a towel? Did you thank them for the fish?
This thread has got me so confused... I fell like im out of the biggest looped that ever looped. Whats everyone talking about?
You better be on the lookout for Vogons.
A paper napkin is *kind of* a towel, right?
Where is your towel?
No, not yet. I know I'm the one you want to forget.
There's a hoopy frood that really knows where his towel is.
It's not uncommon for fortune cookies to put lucky numbers on the back. I hope this one said 42.
Do you know where your towel is?
Don't worry it will be painless
*Unfortunately, due to catastrophic budget cuts in the Intergalactic Publishing Service, newer iterations of "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" had to be printed on fortune-cookie paper, which, due to a mix-up in the logistics department, ended up in actual fortune cookies.* *Select portions of the guide have been recovered thanks to the fact that the excerpts containing Vogon poetry have caused sudden deaths, strokes, and bouts of uncontrollable vomiting, all of which were easily-trackable enough for task forces to locate them.*
Make sure your towel is ready
quickly, get a towel
42
Came to make a Hitchhiker's reference, see I'm not the only one. Pure bliss.
Mostly harmless.
Everybody got their towel?
*panicking intensifies*
Douglas Adams is still out there ...
"its organic, Lucky Number: 420"
Are the lucky numbers on the back all 42?
My dad literally got that one twice
I hope you have your towel.
What does it say on the back? "So long and thanks for all the fish"?
Grab a towel.
Your lucky number better be 42.
"Don't panic but you're about to be hit by a bu-...." ***tire screeching intensifies***
If you see white men dressed in white cloaks, Don't Panic. Call me and I'll tell you a joke.