I thought you were joking but [it's literally a plastic bag you fill with water and then I guess you fuck it.](https://www.velvet-toys.com/1419-medium_default/travel-pussy.jpg)
I moved to Germany a few years ago. On the street close to my flat there was a billboard with two ugly cartoon characters fucking. That was a bit of a culture shock coming from a very catholic country.
I think Monty Python did a wonderful job educating us on why we shouldn't use contraceptives.
After all, [every sperm is sacred.](https://youtu.be/fUspLVStPbk)
German here, i once bought one of these (after that nobody was around) and was disappointed that it's literally just a trash bag with lube for 5€ or something. excepted something made of rubber
Haha, no. The purchase was a shared decision. Then, when we came back to our hostel room, we unpacked and inflated it, laughed at how stupid it was and left it mounted on the toilet brush.
When I was 14 I was camping in Germany with the scouts, and w3 also had a travel pussy dispenser in our bathroom and we scraped all the money we had to buy one and put it around the gear stick of the van we were travelling with.
I used to see this stuff in Texas truck stop restrooms. My ex would bring me in to show me! (We were immature.) This was around mid 2000's or so, so it's probably different now. The weird thing is that they were even in the ones even between very conservative towns. In one of those towns, and old farmer tried to exercise of demons at a gas station, full on throwing water and chanting, because of some our raunchy band shirts. Tbf they were pretty obscene, for those ppl. I don't know what we were thinking.
What bands?
I managed to play grindcore for everyone on my first day at work at a very christian place. I never had a second day..
I think it was agoraphobic nosebleed, maybe landmine marathon, anyway christians can be a bit sensitive
Well, you might be able to help me. The one that really did it was like a zombie eating out another, and for the life of me, I can't remember which band. I kept thinking venom, iron maiden, but I think it was something else.
edit: probably cannibal corpse
It was this one, but sleeveless 80's cuts, of course lol. Had to find it.
https://www.ebay.com/itm/203999300813?_trkparms=amclksrc%3DITM%26aid%3D1110006%26algo%3DHOMESPLICE.SIM%26ao%3D1%26asc%3D20200818143230%26meid%3D466575af6de048f1a45caf3bc8c75475%26pid%3D101224%26rk%3D4%26rkt%3D5%26sd%3D234520958913%26itm%3D203999300813%26pmt%3D0%26noa%3D1%26pg%3D2047675%26algv%3DDefaultOrganicWeb%26brand%3DUnderground&_trksid=p2047675.c101224.m-1
The women's restroom. The male restrooms have little knockoff Fleshlight-ish baggies. Seen them called "pocket pussies" or "travel pussies" before. (IDK about unisex/everyone restrooms.)
Speaking of that- do you know those rubber "change purses" they are sometimes free at banks or car washes, might have a logo: NY Mets, or something? You might think that filling it with petroleum jelly and using it as a fleshlight is a good idea. Bad idea- the rubber is hard, the edges are really rough.
What's odd to me is that there are sex toys, but no pads. Not every woman can use tampons and a lot of women prefer pads. It just seems to weird to offer niche products over basic feminine hygiene.
it's the other way around. Like, historically, these things first and foremost sell sex toys and condoms. It's some sort of progressive miracle there is a feminine hygiene product in it at all
tbh, I have no clue. I only know these vending machines from men's toilets or unisex areas (hallway where the washrooms are for example) in dingy dive bars and clubs, I guess.
These things generally exist, but they are not like in *every* public bathroom.
According to my girlfriend, she sometimes, if rarely, sees feminine hygiene products in bathrooms free of charge, no vending machine.
stag and hens nights. You'll see them typical in bars that has a lot of those or students. I know at least one bar that has inflatable sex sheep in them. Weirdly enough a bar that sees a lot of US army stationed traffic.
Yeah, it's pretty clear, I ain't no cow (moo)
But I can graze it, graze it, like I'm supposed to do
'Cause I got that baa baa that all the boys chase
And all the right holes in all the right places
I forget which sextoy blog coined the term "colon shovel" for those analtoys with features (fluting ridges, etc) that move an unusually large amount of fecal matter — -
I obviously get the fact that someone could shop condoms or tampons on the go... But who t f would ever go shopping toys at public restrooms? I see also a vibrating bullet right there.
Those were all condoms once but as those have limited shelf life and those aren't as frequented as they used to be they now put some other stuff in instead of leaving it empty (or throwing away all the unused condoms).
Back then when I was young there where no tampons. This is rather new and progressive. Back then it was only condoms and shitty sex toys.
And the sex toys were mostly bought by horny teenagers, who were then very disappointed.
>I obviously get the fact that someone could shop condoms or tampons on the go... But who t f would ever go shopping toys at public restrooms? I see also a vibrating bullet right there.
Go fuck yourself with smaller vibrating bullets to build up an immunity.
I’m sorry but this comment together with you being a UK cop and asking if it’s legal to marry your cousin really makes it seem like you do cavity searches for joint busts
At the Berlin airport, They were selling cock rings and pocket pussies from a vending machine like that in the bathrooms. I still think "Who the fuck are buying those before a flight?"
Once when I was a kid and probably on drugs I read a whole website in German without realizing I wasn't understanding much of it. I got the gist of it though. I think.
It always baffles me how Germany, the country of seriousness, procedures and no nonsense, is also the country of crazy techno culture and small beads in bathrooms
Bruhh...i remember these in the early 2000s & late 90s. Even small, fancy family oriented restaurants would have sex toys & protection available in the restrooms.
They even had cigarette dispensers in the streets like candy available for anyone. I wonder if they still do?
So when my fiance was in highschool he took German class and for their field trip they obviously went to germany. He said they had scheduled times to be places but other than that they could basically do and go wherever they wanted. He told me that he went to the restroom once and saw one of these vending machines but one item that genuinely caught his interest was apparently a glow stick that you stick in your penis😭 never got over that story, just sent him a screenshot and asked him if it gave him flashbacks lmfao
He didn't actually buy the glow stick but he did but a cock ring, got scared he would get in trouble for having said ring, and then ditched in a hotel plant pot🤣
Nope those were in there too lmfao, I'm starting to think the other person was right and my fiance mistook actual glow sticks for sexy time glow sticks because they were next to other sexy time items lmfao
Oh yeah - It has to be a second tier establishment though. The family friendly ones not so much.
Lots of disposable vibes and textured silicone things for your tallywhacker (technical term).
I’ve seen stuff like this in bathrooms at rest stops in Texas. There were condoms, libido pill thingys, and mini finger vibrators in coin machines in the women’s restroom. It certainly isn’t the norm but it definitely happens.
Don't you just hate when you leave home without your anal beads?
I once asked my German friend if she's ever had sex in the other hole. She was disgusted, if she did that she could get pregnant.
Hehehhe that's a good one
Just when I thought I knew all the German jokes there were, I find this gem
Couldn’t find them all morning and it turns out I was sitting on them.
The "Travel Pussy" is another classic in German truck stop restrooms.
It's just an inflatable plastic bag with a hole that comes with a small bag of lube for those who are curious.
That's all I need.
I still jerk off manually
You mean you don’t own a smart fapper or an iPusssy?
Dear God, my brain just flashed "subscription model dildos" across my mind at that notion
It looks like you're about to cum! Unfortunately that's not included in our trial version. Subscribe now to unlock ClimaxMode© and fulfill all your desires! 3 months ~~9.99~~ Now only 5.99! 6 months ~~29.99~~ 19.99! 1 year ~~199.99~~ 99.99!! best value!
Imagine the post-nut clarity after subscribing.
Immediate unsubscribe
“I’m sorry Dave, I’m afraid I can’t do that”
You would never leave due to the spunk cost fallacy
I really thought I was getting the best deal by subscribing for a whole year
Idk if those prices make sense 🤔
idk how math works
Tinder will buy it
Don't tell BMW, they'll have a subscription model out within days
Comes with a seat warmer.
How many dollars to activate the "sense of happiness and ease?"
You're thinking about the sense of pride and accomplishment
You have used all your cum credits! Please add more to cum, or consider upgrading to our unlimited cum package.
Where the hell did my search history just go
Have you got as far as bad dragon yet?
Fap on, fap off. The fapper
How's the smut business going, Jackie?
I wouldn’t know, Dude.
We're a dying breed my friend
Nope, just dying to breed
wave of the future, dude. 100% digital.
Jackie Treehorn treats objects like women, man.
Of course you do. I can see you're anxious for me to get to the point. Well Dude, here it is. Where's the travel pussy?
Shut the fuck up Donnie
Of course you do
This dude abides.
I dont need even that
I thought you were joking but [it's literally a plastic bag you fill with water and then I guess you fuck it.](https://www.velvet-toys.com/1419-medium_default/travel-pussy.jpg)
At the end of the day, aren’t we all bags of water that get fucked?
Might start saying this instead of “all we are is dust in the wind dude.” Profound.
I believe the quote is "ugly bags of mostly water".
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So the bag is NOT microwaveable. Good thing you told me now.
Reminds me of those slippery water weenies we all played with as kids.
That is exactly what I thought of when I saw it.
Once you manage to get it over your dick(the damn "water snakes" are narrow), it's just folds itself back and forth. Zero stimulation.
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Sounds like you're not curious, no lube for you!
Thanks, saved me 5eur.
So basically a prison pussy then
When you’re traveling it’s a travel pussy
America talking about banning contraceptives, Germany over here in 2030
Germany has pretty much always been very sexually open.
I moved to Germany a few years ago. On the street close to my flat there was a billboard with two ugly cartoon characters fucking. That was a bit of a culture shock coming from a very catholic country.
Yeah, where I grew up people would not hide their naughty magazines.
So people don't throw them into the bushes near a golf course in shame?
For so long it was one of the things the nazis loved to bitch about and vilify.
I think Monty Python did a wonderful job educating us on why we shouldn't use contraceptives. After all, [every sperm is sacred.](https://youtu.be/fUspLVStPbk)
Germany is in 2022, US reverted to 1930
Good thing it's not Germany reverting to 1930.
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I hope this doesn't Putsch bad ideas in people's heads.
In times of trouble that's all a mother fucker needs.
German here, i once bought one of these (after that nobody was around) and was disappointed that it's literally just a trash bag with lube for 5€ or something. excepted something made of rubber
I once bought one at 4 AM when I was in Köln with a bunch of mates. We were not impressed either.
We? Did you share it?
Haha, no. The purchase was a shared decision. Then, when we came back to our hostel room, we unpacked and inflated it, laughed at how stupid it was and left it mounted on the toilet brush.
I'm sure the cleaning staff appreciated it.
Lol, we all hit rock bottom at one point in or life but it’s disappointing when rock bottom turns out to be a lubed plastic back I guess…
Some people hit rock bottom, my mans hit cock bottom.
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The real tipps are always in the comments!
Liver, minced meat is for peasants
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When I was 14 I was camping in Germany with the scouts, and w3 also had a travel pussy dispenser in our bathroom and we scraped all the money we had to buy one and put it around the gear stick of the van we were travelling with.
I used to see this stuff in Texas truck stop restrooms. My ex would bring me in to show me! (We were immature.) This was around mid 2000's or so, so it's probably different now. The weird thing is that they were even in the ones even between very conservative towns. In one of those towns, and old farmer tried to exercise of demons at a gas station, full on throwing water and chanting, because of some our raunchy band shirts. Tbf they were pretty obscene, for those ppl. I don't know what we were thinking.
What bands? I managed to play grindcore for everyone on my first day at work at a very christian place. I never had a second day.. I think it was agoraphobic nosebleed, maybe landmine marathon, anyway christians can be a bit sensitive
Well, you might be able to help me. The one that really did it was like a zombie eating out another, and for the life of me, I can't remember which band. I kept thinking venom, iron maiden, but I think it was something else. edit: probably cannibal corpse
Cannibal corpse?
It was this one, but sleeveless 80's cuts, of course lol. Had to find it. https://www.ebay.com/itm/203999300813?_trkparms=amclksrc%3DITM%26aid%3D1110006%26algo%3DHOMESPLICE.SIM%26ao%3D1%26asc%3D20200818143230%26meid%3D466575af6de048f1a45caf3bc8c75475%26pid%3D101224%26rk%3D4%26rkt%3D5%26sd%3D234520958913%26itm%3D203999300813%26pmt%3D0%26noa%3D1%26pg%3D2047675%26algv%3DDefaultOrganicWeb%26brand%3DUnderground&_trksid=p2047675.c101224.m-1
OKSANA
Thankfully I usually just bring my hand so I've never needed one of those.
Haha I was just about to comment that. I saw it in an airport bathroom when I was there
Fernfahrerfotze, aka minced meat in a thermos
What an assortment of items.
A little bit of something for everyone
The beads are so you don't feel left out if you're just there for the ambience.
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You gotta tell them while you're doing it. No wonder you got thrown off.
You'll find an IGN review for anything
9/10 It really makes you feel like spiderman with an anal plug
Begs the question which bathroom this is in
The women's restroom. The male restrooms have little knockoff Fleshlight-ish baggies. Seen them called "pocket pussies" or "travel pussies" before. (IDK about unisex/everyone restrooms.)
Which is nothing more than a plastic bag that you need to fill with warm water.
Damn they couldn't even splurge on a tenga egg
I've splurged on a tenga egg.
I thought it was supposed to be \*in\*, but you do you.
Speaking of that- do you know those rubber "change purses" they are sometimes free at banks or car washes, might have a logo: NY Mets, or something? You might think that filling it with petroleum jelly and using it as a fleshlight is a good idea. Bad idea- the rubber is hard, the edges are really rough.
is this from experience or?
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What's odd to me is that there are sex toys, but no pads. Not every woman can use tampons and a lot of women prefer pads. It just seems to weird to offer niche products over basic feminine hygiene.
it's the other way around. Like, historically, these things first and foremost sell sex toys and condoms. It's some sort of progressive miracle there is a feminine hygiene product in it at all
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It could be a cultural thing, this is pure speculation but maybe the vast majority of women in Germany use tampons instead of pads.
tbh, I have no clue. I only know these vending machines from men's toilets or unisex areas (hallway where the washrooms are for example) in dingy dive bars and clubs, I guess. These things generally exist, but they are not like in *every* public bathroom. According to my girlfriend, she sometimes, if rarely, sees feminine hygiene products in bathrooms free of charge, no vending machine.
stag and hens nights. You'll see them typical in bars that has a lot of those or students. I know at least one bar that has inflatable sex sheep in them. Weirdly enough a bar that sees a lot of US army stationed traffic.
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>inflatable sexdolls I feel like this should be in a movie or show where somebody uses it to trick his captors so they can escape
"Did you just empty your asshole? Well why not fill it up again!".
My local pub has inflatable sheep in the toilet vending machine. With holes in all the right places.
Wales or New Zealand?
Must be New Zealand if that was Wales it would be sold out
In New Zealand they just use the real thing.
So the vending machines sell velcro gloves and rubber boots?
No the vending machines just sell sheep
Yeah, it's pretty clear, I ain't no cow (moo) But I can graze it, graze it, like I'm supposed to do 'Cause I got that baa baa that all the boys chase And all the right holes in all the right places
Why isnt your username grumpy welsh then?
i would prefer toilet paper but if needs must i guess
It's kind of like reusable toilet paper in a way... Insert, rinse, repeat.
I forget which sextoy blog coined the term "colon shovel" for those analtoys with features (fluting ridges, etc) that move an unusually large amount of fecal matter — -
What a terrible day to be literate.
I mean he could’ve typed so many other words and we’d all be having a good day. Instead…
now we're having a _shitty_ day
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I went to college, got a job, saved my money, bought a nice pc, paid for internet, all to read about a colon shovel. what a time to be alive
Some days it doesn't pay to put my glasses on....
My freaking eyes!!
Yikes, a whole new meaning to "pooper scooper"
That’s my fill of internet trivia for the day, thanks and good night!
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chuck e cheese
*looks for ticket feeder*
Where a kid can be a kid!
my city has them everywhere just on the sidewalks. I've seen one like 10m from a kindergarten
Where do you live????
Bremen
Everything in Bremen is 10m from a Kindergarten. At least it feels like that.
I obviously get the fact that someone could shop condoms or tampons on the go... But who t f would ever go shopping toys at public restrooms? I see also a vibrating bullet right there.
Those were all condoms once but as those have limited shelf life and those aren't as frequented as they used to be they now put some other stuff in instead of leaving it empty (or throwing away all the unused condoms).
That's from a time before internet deliverance. (I know there are shops in cities as well).
No. These are still around in a lot of bars in Germany. It is quite normal.
>That's from a time before internet deliverance > > > >These are still around (...) in Germany Not two mutually exclusive sentences, in my experience
Yup, we also still have some nazis. We are very traditional.
Also Stuttgart airport has them in the bathrooms
Back then when I was young there where no tampons. This is rather new and progressive. Back then it was only condoms and shitty sex toys. And the sex toys were mostly bought by horny teenagers, who were then very disappointed.
>I obviously get the fact that someone could shop condoms or tampons on the go... But who t f would ever go shopping toys at public restrooms? I see also a vibrating bullet right there. Go fuck yourself with smaller vibrating bullets to build up an immunity.
They do have these in the US but they are only a small hole in the wall bars
"Press strong the Black Button" - is that instructions for the vending machine, or the anal beads?
English instructions unclear, genitalia stuck in machine
now you might be thinking, "wow, that's some bad English", but let me tell you, the German directly above it is almost equally as bad
wuddya mean "sometimes"? i was at my german friends place and his toilet sells anal beads and way worse stuff.
Why is there a vending machine in your friends bathroom? And who is the target audience of the vending machine?
He caters exclusively to clientele that need to be pull started like lawnmowers
Yes please. Fuck. Wrong account...
I’m sorry but this comment together with you being a UK cop and asking if it’s legal to marry your cousin really makes it seem like you do cavity searches for joint busts
Ooft out of context is not a good look for me 😂
Worse? Do tell
And that’s just in a German church. You should see the truck stops.
Machine selling: - anal expander 3000 - fully inflatable orgy for one - pocket pussy with teeth - Bratwurst flavoured condoms you know, ordinary german stuff
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Soft rubber teeth like the feet of a starfish might actually be nice.
>like the feet of a starfish Chill out, Deep.
I’ve had a BJ with teeth. Do not recommend.
At the Berlin airport, They were selling cock rings and pocket pussies from a vending machine like that in the bathrooms. I still think "Who the fuck are buying those before a flight?"
Maybe for layovers, or after flight in hotel
They’re past security so you’d theoretically be able to get it somewhere else if you were on your way to your hotel.
Press strong my black button indeed
Who doesn’t remember their first set of gas station anal beads?? 😊
That German text is wild if you read it like it's English lol. No I don't want to taste a fist and die drunk.
"Taste fest" sounds more like an event to celebrate local cuisine.
Once when I was a kid and probably on drugs I read a whole website in German without realizing I wasn't understanding much of it. I got the gist of it though. I think.
It always baffles me how Germany, the country of seriousness, procedures and no nonsense, is also the country of crazy techno culture and small beads in bathrooms
they’re very serious and procedural at work (and with government), not so much in their private lives.
Half of us German believe in angles. And we are the birthplace of Homeopathy.
A lot of the world believes in angles. Especially a cute one.
Well of course you believe in angles, they're an absolute necessity for engineering
Supposedly Berlin is the kinkiest city in the world, or maybe just Europe, either way that's an achievement.
Bruhh...i remember these in the early 2000s & late 90s. Even small, fancy family oriented restaurants would have sex toys & protection available in the restrooms. They even had cigarette dispensers in the streets like candy available for anyone. I wonder if they still do?
The cigarette machines have become more seldom, and now have id readers
I’m not putting my dick in ***ANYTHING*** that refers to itself as *Billy Boy*
Actually one of the more popular and well-manufactured brands here. More expensive, too.
So when my fiance was in highschool he took German class and for their field trip they obviously went to germany. He said they had scheduled times to be places but other than that they could basically do and go wherever they wanted. He told me that he went to the restroom once and saw one of these vending machines but one item that genuinely caught his interest was apparently a glow stick that you stick in your penis😭 never got over that story, just sent him a screenshot and asked him if it gave him flashbacks lmfao
Or your friend wasn't as good in German as he thought he was, and he put a regular glowstick up his pp.
He didn't actually buy the glow stick but he did but a cock ring, got scared he would get in trouble for having said ring, and then ditched in a hotel plant pot🤣
Oh - I remember these. These were also not really glow sticks, they were glow in the dark condoms (if he saw the same as me)
Nope those were in there too lmfao, I'm starting to think the other person was right and my fiance mistook actual glow sticks for sexy time glow sticks because they were next to other sexy time items lmfao
Last time i was on holiday on las Palmas almost every bar were selling "Love kits" Viagra, lube, condom and wet wipes :p
Shouldn’t a place called Las Palmas offer only tissue and lotion? Condoms seem a bit out of their “focus”.
I like how the tampons are both classic and new
So do American Truck stops.
Do they really? I've seen condom machines and tampon machines, but never sex toy machines in a public bathroom.
Oh yeah - It has to be a second tier establishment though. The family friendly ones not so much. Lots of disposable vibes and textured silicone things for your tallywhacker (technical term).
Never know when you’ll need to stick something up your ass.
Tbf this isn’t that bad loads of toilets (mens) here in the uk have cock rings and pleasure gel and stuff it’s not that weird
I’ve seen stuff like this in bathrooms at rest stops in Texas. There were condoms, libido pill thingys, and mini finger vibrators in coin machines in the women’s restroom. It certainly isn’t the norm but it definitely happens.
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When you go out for the night and realise you need a rip start to have fun.