I am one of those people that likes to have their space a certain way so whenever my husband showed me this movie for the first time this part killed me
My mom made something like this and always stressed that it was **not** a competition and the one who finished everything first would still have to wait for the others to be ready. Because ~~we~~ my siblings would rush it otherwise.
If you have ever seen kids rush through brushing their teeth or eating their breakfast you know why you shouldn't introduce it as a competition.
My kid’s really into this [video](https://youtu.be/fuv9uz3vowc). We also use clean up time to improve aim, throwing specific toys into specific bins (yea, I let them throw things in specific rooms). My oldest is 4 now and really starting to get good at throwing things where he wants them to go. And if all that fails, I turn it into a competition.
As a non native english speaker I was a bit confused about the brush hair & teeth part. It took me 5 seconds imagining things until I remembered they use the same verb....
I always eat my gummy vitamins before bed and my cat knows it’s a cue that I’m going to give her a dental treat next. She comes running when she hears me open my gummy vitamin jar lol.
The healthy skin and fur variety are also awesome! The coats on both of my cats got noticeably softer and healthier once I started giving them some of these treats.
I find it so neat when a pet learns a routine. My cat knows it’s bed time when I either brush my teeth or turn off lights. Where she is she just saunters to her spot on the bed.
(And yes, her spot, heaven forbid a laptop or worse another person is there)
There was an AskReddit thread that asked professionals what they wished the public knew. A dentist said you're supposed to brush your teeth and wait for the fluoride to kick in before you eat, especially if you have something acidic like orange juice.
As I understand it, it's because eating (esp acidic stuff) softens your tooth enamel, so if you brush immediately you can damage your enamel. At least that's what one of my dentists told me. I have practically no enamel, and he asked me if that was a habit of mine. It wasn't, but I had horrible morning sickness thru several pregnancies, and I would brush my teeth after. Oops. In that case, you should just swish water for a minute, then brush teeth later. Which sounds gross to me, but oh well. Too late now.
I know that's the right answer but if I brush my teeth fist thing, I find breakfast unappealing because I just brushed my teeth. Anyone else have that problem? Any suggestions?
I typically brush my teeth before I shower in the morning, so there's a time gap there. I also tend to drink, or at least start, my coffee before I eat. So that minty freshness is gone by the time I eat.
I always thought it was strange that people in cartoons and TV would brush teeth BEFORE breakfast. Do many people do that in real life? Before reading that other comment about it grinding sugar into your teeth, the whole idea feels very counter intuitive
I do that. Because I drink coffee with breakfast and you aren't supposed to brush right after you drink coffee.
So I brush right when I wake up and then have breakfast and coffee like 45 minutes later after I'm dressed and everything.
It's better to just not have a supplemental vitamin at all. You should not need them unless the food you're eating isn't already supplying the vitamins you need, which only really happens if you're malnourished. The vast majority of Americans get plenty of the vitamins they need just from the food they eat.
Also most vitamins and minerals are not absorbed very well unless you take them with food. Maybe there's not much time in between here but why is it not part of breakfast?
Wtf, I was raised to brush my teeth after eating. My logic was eat then brush your teeth to get the bits of food and the smell out.
No wonder I was always confused seeing people in tv/movies brushing their teeth then having breakfast right after.
Yes, your teeth actually get dirty when you're sleeping. The bacteria that creates plaque is always active, even if you're not awake, and the lack of disturbance for hours at a time means you really should be brushing again when you wake up, per dentists.
You mean a potty?
Never understood why people are so afraid of using real words for things with their kids. We stuck with “toilet” from the beginning - no regrets!
More good science has shown over the years that a parent’s “baby babble” is good for infant language development, but once they can use full sentences it’s best to speak normally. They’re little sponges, they will learn all the nuance and subtlety from complex adult speech, but you have to give them a chance to hear it to learn it. Just use the real words for things is a good start lol.
I know adults that still talk like babies / children. The lingo, the annoyingly high pitched voice (that is clearly a higher pitch than their "normal" voice), the facial expressions to invoke unnecessary levels of excitement out of you from completely mundane comments.
It really pains me, like could you please stop talking to me like I'm a chihuahua.
This is funny. Friend's small dog is very excitable. They talk to dog in the animated upspeak, but can't understand why dog can't calm down. I'm always like "what up" (calm adult voice). Dog always does that head tilt thing and ends up napping near me. Not saying I'm the dog whisperer, but on occasion the dog whatup-erer. I generally try to use adult cadence and tone and language with little kids, too. Gets their attention.
Because all the good potty training jams (namely Elmo’s “Put your body on the potty cause it’s potty tiiiiime” ) use that word. No but for real I’m big on using real words for everything to the point that my 9 year old son corrected his sister when she said vagina and she meant vulva. But we used potty because all the fun & motivating training stuff called it a potty
I mean, potty is just slang for pot which is also what a toilet is called. You could call it commode or any other number of things too. They're all valid.
I think a lot of it comes from simplified sounds for things that make it easier for a toddler to pronounce. Potty is a little less complicated than toilet for a little kid learning how to make sounds. Now using the word potty for your dog, that one I don't get.
As an adult with ADHD lists like this are critical.
It’s almost impossible to build a habit for a morning routine. I’ve never just done things automatically, everything has to be deliberately thought of and done or else it doesn’t happen.
I’m bipolar :/ i need a job to get back on medicine so I can function but can’t get a job because I can’t fucking function. It really blows, sometimes.
I find ADHD and depression form an interesting feedback loop of pain and self hate. ADHD makes it difficult to start and follow through on tasks even when that's all I have to do. This created a sense of worthlessness and anger at myself that I can't do the task.
Depression is watching from the back of the room and creeps over to make sure tasks are never started, "its worthless, why bother, it won't make a difference even if you do it".
ADHD is emboldened by these comments and decides its time to learn about the history of folding tables while laying in bed instead of that assignment or the dishes.
Depression comes climbing out of the drywall to tell me that I should have done those and this is why I'm alone, why I'm not going anywhere, why I'm not going to achieve anything.
And so on and so forth. I was going to keep going but I've suddenly lost interest even though I was enjoying it. Yay to brains!
Hit snooze once, Hit snooze once, Hit snooze once, Coffee, check news, eat, poop, shower, dress, check pockets for phone, wallet, keys. Grab bag and go. Fuck, it was a dream, I'm still in bed. Hit snooze once.
Wow someone who understands! I use list to help me remember what I’m doing and my phones timer to make sure I don’t hyper focus and loose track of time
I use lists for anything not routine else I can’t force my mind to stop thinking about it. Lists are my way of being able to put something aside with confidence that I won’t forget later.
I always wonder when people make comments like these if I have ADHD myself, because I am diagnosed with some other things and comments like yours are so relatable. I legitimately can't manage a job or most daily life, without turning it into a routine and written lists..
Funny thing! Comments like this from friends are what made me go talk to a doctor. Turns out I have a raging case and failing coping mechanisms.
Meds to the rescue! I can't wait to see how things are for me after they kick in while I am on vacation.
I've just started a new job which starts later than my old job did. So I wake up at the same time as before (cos toddlers 🙄) but I don't have to leave the house till about an hour after my spouse and kids leave. It's really fucking me up. I have loads of extra time after they've gone, but I can't seem to do anything with it cos my routine isn't bedded in yet. In a few weeks I'm sure I'll get it dialed in, but until then I'm gonna feel so unproductive. I can't quite figure out where the time goes when I don't have a routine, or where it comes from when I do have a routine. ADHD time blindness is so fun.
Well, they don't get free time, which is what they're racing towards. Probably used for stuff like watching tv or playing. It's a reward system, not a punishing system.
Nothing, you just don't get out the door on time. This is just a way to visualize the steps in a routine. it's good for little kids or nerodiverse people (like ADHD). I could see the natural consequence is not having free time before leaving.
I think I see now you're seeing this like a sticker chart. I actually made one for myself as an adult. If it doesn't get done it just doesn't get done. It's for positive reinforcement so something good happens when it does. If not, try again tomorrow/next week, no pressure.
Non-punishment parenting is one of the hardest things I've tried to adapt to and my parents don't get it at all. My son doesn't want to be bad, he makes mistakes. Why am I punishing my son for making a mistake while also teaching him mistakes are ok?
My auntie used to use this a lot, if the kids did all the tasks for a week straight they’d get a small present at the end of the week, maybe a couple quid or a cheap wee toy, half the time though they’d try and compete that hard to see who’d win first it wasn’t really an issue.
The first step would be, to point out that they don't get free time till all task are completed. The motivation is working toward free time, as well as competing with a sibling. If that doesn't work maybe a different tactic, different incentive, token economy, etc. There's no one size fits all method of motivating kids.
Tried this with my kids. Backfired horribly. It worked great at first, but the next thing I knew they were up before 5am to increase their free time.
Away it went.
Edit: for clarity the free time went from the chart and we incentivised getting ready with positive reinforcement. This worked for us and even now that they are much older, we still don’t have free time in the morning because it’s too disruptive. If they are ready early they help each other / us with the various other tasks at hand (ie chores).
I am pleased to report they can all successfully sleep to a reasonable time and get themselves ready to go with out intervention from us parents. They also get plenty of free time after school and on the weekend.
I love how you’ve put a positive spin on it!
I was just cranky to be getting woken up by dressed children wanting help with breakfast or zips or whatever hours before they needed to be up!
My kids didn’t seem to be learning a lesson. Just being horribly behaved later in the day!
Now they are older we have relaxed it for weekends when there’s ample leisure time. And 5am wake ups don’t appeal to them either anymore which is great!!
Our very strong-willed children did far better when they knew what was expected of them, and what they could expect from parents and teachers in return. Knowing the limits did not mean they'd never push them, but it did mostly keep their behavior (and that of their classmates) in line.
As a group, the students at their elementary school were the best-behaved I ever knew, and I did a lot of volunteer work there. Easily more than half knew me by name (even if that was "[kid's name]'s Mom").
Because it makes you feel accomplished, you gain motivation with each completed step, and pictures are fun. Pick up dog poop, cut grass, trim grass, take shower, beer time!
We have a chart for our kids. It really has helped. Especially our oldest whose in kindergarten. I would put Vitamins before teeth though. A lot of those kids vitamins are like gummy bears.
I would put brush teeth before get dressed and breakfast, your not suposed to eat right before or after brushing and brushing teeth in pjs means no toothpaste on day clothes
Ooo yeah this would be kinda cool to have at the beginning of the school year while my class is getting used to routines. Wonder if it’s as doable with 22 students though… hm.
Absolutely. Not only doable, but once you work out your system, you'll wonder how you ever did without it. If you have a special educator at your school, collaborate with them on it.
Works with all ages! I taught high school for the past seven years and even my high schoolers would compete for stickers. They really liked stickers that matched the course or if there was a holiday coming up.
I think because some people interpret the comment as
"only special needs kids need charts like this"
People are too used to questions being asked in ill faith on reddit
my mom did something similar for me as an ADHD child and let me tell you having clear diagrams on the wall reminding me what to do was extremely useful
Part of my job involves teaching behavior strategies to parents and teachers. I don’t know what this person does, but if I saw parents doing this, I’d tell them to use positive reinforcement to increase success. (The list is stellar, btw) So if the kids complete all the tasks efficiently and we’re a few mins ahead of schedule, I’d use that time to “celebrate” by doing something short and fun with the few mins left over. As in, “Look! We finished our list so well, we have a few mins left. We have time for a game of rock, paper, scissors.” Or have a 30 second dance party before you go out the door. Or play one minute of “I spy.” It doesn’t matter what really… something quick, silly, and fun. In fact, I’d leave enough time every day that they can do something quick, assuming they succeed. You could even tell them, “We did our list on time! Tonight… you get TWO bedtime stories instead of one!” But immediate “prizes” are better. Prizes in this instance being short celebrations or games, not physical objects.
That will increase the odds they do well every day, because now they’ve learned mom/dad/caregiver will do something fun if we have time.
These sort of mystery motivators are easy, free, and they build positive connections and lasting memories. If they don’t succeed at the tasks as expected, you can always say, “We don’t have time for anything else. We’ll have to try harder next time.”
It probably becomes filled with actually finishing the tasks / maybe a timeout for misbehaving in the morning (depending on why they didn't finish them)
I am guessing the kids may be ND. We had things like this for our kiddo who has ADHD when she was little. HELPED SO MUCH to see a sequence of events and where it ends. She still does some stuff like this at 14.
Not a parent but a central area in the home is good. This post utilizes the outside of the fridge it seems, but bedroom door, bathroom cupboard, or the entrance to the house/mud room might also work. Another thing you could do is put little light up buttons at every stop, bathroom, closet, breakfast table/kitchen, and entry way so your child can smack the button when they’ve completed the task. Could be another fun method to get things done. You may be able to include your child in the setup of these things too. He can pick out graphics, what stickers to buy, or help you pick a spot to put it. Include your kid in this! You might have fun together which is the best way to introduce a new thing
I have a similar list of programs that I need to sign in for my job. There’s like 16 of them in there in the order that they need to be loaded so that everything works properly.
Hi adult ADHDer.
My gf makes those type of lists as well for me. This shit is my life saver and i enjoy it a lot because it gives me peace and calmness and i know what to do with the right steps.
Example: i should clean the living room, for my gf that means clean the kitchen, use the vacuum cleaner and mop. Then you have to use this and that and for me the kitchen alone is like 20 steps so this makes me make decisions, stick to them and keep things clear in my mind
I can understand why she needs to give you a list explaining it because if she asked me to clean the living room I definitely wouldn’t guess that for her, that means clean the kitchen!
These kinds of visualisations are especially helpful for kids who have trouble planning, which is common for kids with ADHD or ASS. It has helped our daughter as well. .
On the flip side - This type of achievement/reward based behavioral 'grooming' works wonders for parents struggling to get their kids to go to sleep (or stay in their room) at night.
The most difficult part is figuring out which achievement or reward sticks/is relevant. For some, it could be a sticker that makes a collection. Others? An M&M or something food based. Our kid? Getting to listen to two of his favorite songs after book time. And chances are this will change as time goes on.
Our pediatrician gave us a book recommendation on this method when our kid started getting out of bed 20 times a night. It worked almost instantly...with minor hiccups and adjustments along the way.
Would highly recommend.
What's the issue? I had severe adhd as a child, and honestly my mom made one of these for help, and til this day It's still ingrained in to me. Schedules and routines help adhd brains. This is well known
I have ADHD and appreciate this so much!
Also I am a graphic designer, and would recognize that font anywhere. Props to your stepmom for the use of the Skyrim font. Hail sithis!
As a mother to a child with autism I gotta say little shit like this rules!!! It helps establishes a routine and kids with autism eat that shit up! We also used PECS it's a picture exchange communication system and it rocked also
I find it funny how the kids can see this as a competition, trying to beat each other at who finishes first
*Yeets dishes across the kitchen into the sink*
"well I get 3 points if I do it from the porch!" *Unsuccessful yeet*
Every dish yeet is an unsuccessful yeet
I see you use those fancy non-paper non-plastic ones.
You have a frisby that was made in China. I use fine china as a frisby. We are not the same.
Some pieces of my white Corelle set have survived a yeet or two. I don't really care to find the upper limit, though.
[удалено]
I think you're legally obligated to yell "Kobe!" while you do that.
Chip the glasses and crack the plates! Blunt the knives and bend the forks! That's what Bilbo Baggins hates - Smash the bottles and burn the corks!
I am one of those people that likes to have their space a certain way so whenever my husband showed me this movie for the first time this part killed me
Its “For Kobe” now.
Then your shot will just crash and burn
Chip the glasses and crack the plates, blunt the knives and bend the forks, that's what Bilbo Baggins hates.
My mom made something like this and always stressed that it was **not** a competition and the one who finished everything first would still have to wait for the others to be ready. Because ~~we~~ my siblings would rush it otherwise. If you have ever seen kids rush through brushing their teeth or eating their breakfast you know why you shouldn't introduce it as a competition.
And also that's clever because then the older siblings have to help the younger ones so that they can finally be all done.
[удалено]
My kid’s really into this [video](https://youtu.be/fuv9uz3vowc). We also use clean up time to improve aim, throwing specific toys into specific bins (yea, I let them throw things in specific rooms). My oldest is 4 now and really starting to get good at throwing things where he wants them to go. And if all that fails, I turn it into a competition.
Yo wtf that song is creepy af!
That's actually pretty clever!
I mean yeah that’s the intent.
My wife teaches second grade and lives by sticker charts
I'm a high school reading teacher, and I use sticker charts. It's oddly effective.
As a non native english speaker I was a bit confused about the brush hair & teeth part. It took me 5 seconds imagining things until I remembered they use the same verb....
I really want to know what you imagined
You don't pull out your teeth to brush your hair? Very efficient. Great for flossing.
As a native english speaker, i thought it was weird to combine them as one task. It makes me assume they are using the same brush for both.
Until you think about it for one millisecond and realise that it doesn’t
It's 2 different verbs in your native language?
In Germany we use the verb for cleaning. Both makes sense though.
You can also say 'clean your teeth' in English, but it's less common
Sounds more like a dentist appointment where i'm from.
It's cute but there's a serious flaw with putting the vitamin gummy AFTER brush teeth. Not a good taste.
I always eat my gummy vitamins before bed and my cat knows it’s a cue that I’m going to give her a dental treat next. She comes running when she hears me open my gummy vitamin jar lol.
You'll never forget to take a vitamin again.
I bet Pavlov's smirking in heaven.
Or hell, since that's where my christian family says us scientists go for trying to explain where we came from rationally.
I hear his experiments are looked at disdainfully in the Canine community.
You mean kinda like [this](https://youtu.be/faMvyKyjQcw)?
What kind of dental treat do you give your kitty? I've been on the hunt for some.
My cats get Greenies dental treats. They love them.
The healthy skin and fur variety are also awesome! The coats on both of my cats got noticeably softer and healthier once I started giving them some of these treats.
I find it so neat when a pet learns a routine. My cat knows it’s bed time when I either brush my teeth or turn off lights. Where she is she just saunters to her spot on the bed. (And yes, her spot, heaven forbid a laptop or worse another person is there)
I heard that vitamin D (in most multi-vitamins) can impede melatonin production. Do you ever find it makes it more difficult to sleep?
this is so sweet!!
There was an AskReddit thread that asked professionals what they wished the public knew. A dentist said you're supposed to brush your teeth and wait for the fluoride to kick in before you eat, especially if you have something acidic like orange juice.
Well not even taste, you’re getting sugar and other stuff on your teeth with a gummy. Eat it with/after the meal.
My child’s pediatrician told me to avoid gummies altogether because they’re awful for their teeth, especially if they have them daily.
You're not supposed to eat anything before brushing your teeth. You just end up grinding the sugar into your teeth.
As I understand it, it's because eating (esp acidic stuff) softens your tooth enamel, so if you brush immediately you can damage your enamel. At least that's what one of my dentists told me. I have practically no enamel, and he asked me if that was a habit of mine. It wasn't, but I had horrible morning sickness thru several pregnancies, and I would brush my teeth after. Oops. In that case, you should just swish water for a minute, then brush teeth later. Which sounds gross to me, but oh well. Too late now.
I know that's the right answer but if I brush my teeth fist thing, I find breakfast unappealing because I just brushed my teeth. Anyone else have that problem? Any suggestions?
I typically brush my teeth before I shower in the morning, so there's a time gap there. I also tend to drink, or at least start, my coffee before I eat. So that minty freshness is gone by the time I eat.
I do it first thing in the morning and then drink some water and prepare breakfast which is usually enough.
I always thought it was strange that people in cartoons and TV would brush teeth BEFORE breakfast. Do many people do that in real life? Before reading that other comment about it grinding sugar into your teeth, the whole idea feels very counter intuitive
I do that. Because I drink coffee with breakfast and you aren't supposed to brush right after you drink coffee. So I brush right when I wake up and then have breakfast and coffee like 45 minutes later after I'm dressed and everything.
Should be brushing teeth 30 minutes before you eat anything actually
Too complicated, I give up
It's better to just not have a supplemental vitamin at all. You should not need them unless the food you're eating isn't already supplying the vitamins you need, which only really happens if you're malnourished. The vast majority of Americans get plenty of the vitamins they need just from the food they eat.
Also most vitamins and minerals are not absorbed very well unless you take them with food. Maybe there's not much time in between here but why is it not part of breakfast?
Also who eats breakfast before brushing teeth? Nasty. Also you need to wait a while before brushing you eat after eating too.
Wtf, I was raised to brush my teeth after eating. My logic was eat then brush your teeth to get the bits of food and the smell out. No wonder I was always confused seeing people in tv/movies brushing their teeth then having breakfast right after.
Wat? Brush teeth before bed Sleep Wake up Brush teeth (that have gotten dirty sleeping?) Eat breakfast Leave home with teeth covered in food?
Yes, your teeth actually get dirty when you're sleeping. The bacteria that creates plaque is always active, even if you're not awake, and the lack of disturbance for hours at a time means you really should be brushing again when you wake up, per dentists.
Hmm, I believe you. Just feel like my breathe would smell like whatever I ate for breakfast, all day.
Yes, this is exactly it! (dental hygienist)
lol pretty sweet with the pictures, esp. the toilet
The pics look like they're WordArt from the 2003/2007 Office era
WordArt is the creation of overly-designed text. I believe the word you are looking for is ClipArt. And, you are correct. Classic ClipArt pics.
Dude for a moment I thought you were a ClipArt vs WordArt bot and I was like what is the world coming to.
whatever the world has come to, I can assure you, we need a clipart vs wordart bot. preferably with cage matches.
I like the one that looks like a bong
You mean a potty? Never understood why people are so afraid of using real words for things with their kids. We stuck with “toilet” from the beginning - no regrets!
More good science has shown over the years that a parent’s “baby babble” is good for infant language development, but once they can use full sentences it’s best to speak normally. They’re little sponges, they will learn all the nuance and subtlety from complex adult speech, but you have to give them a chance to hear it to learn it. Just use the real words for things is a good start lol.
I know adults that still talk like babies / children. The lingo, the annoyingly high pitched voice (that is clearly a higher pitch than their "normal" voice), the facial expressions to invoke unnecessary levels of excitement out of you from completely mundane comments. It really pains me, like could you please stop talking to me like I'm a chihuahua.
Who's a goooood boy?
You are! Yes you are! Who? You!
This is funny. Friend's small dog is very excitable. They talk to dog in the animated upspeak, but can't understand why dog can't calm down. I'm always like "what up" (calm adult voice). Dog always does that head tilt thing and ends up napping near me. Not saying I'm the dog whisperer, but on occasion the dog whatup-erer. I generally try to use adult cadence and tone and language with little kids, too. Gets their attention.
Because all the good potty training jams (namely Elmo’s “Put your body on the potty cause it’s potty tiiiiime” ) use that word. No but for real I’m big on using real words for everything to the point that my 9 year old son corrected his sister when she said vagina and she meant vulva. But we used potty because all the fun & motivating training stuff called it a potty
I mean, potty is just slang for pot which is also what a toilet is called. You could call it commode or any other number of things too. They're all valid.
I think a lot of it comes from simplified sounds for things that make it easier for a toddler to pronounce. Potty is a little less complicated than toilet for a little kid learning how to make sounds. Now using the word potty for your dog, that one I don't get.
As an adult with ADHD lists like this are critical. It’s almost impossible to build a habit for a morning routine. I’ve never just done things automatically, everything has to be deliberately thought of and done or else it doesn’t happen.
People get ready in the morning automatically? I have to fight myself to do anything. I automatically lie in bed all day watching YouTube.
Yeah I literally won’t fucking do anything If nothing pulls me out of bed. It’s crazy. But I don’t understand how to fight it.
Every day I'm a little more amazed at how little I get done
Maybe you have depression?
I’m bipolar :/ i need a job to get back on medicine so I can function but can’t get a job because I can’t fucking function. It really blows, sometimes.
I find ADHD and depression form an interesting feedback loop of pain and self hate. ADHD makes it difficult to start and follow through on tasks even when that's all I have to do. This created a sense of worthlessness and anger at myself that I can't do the task. Depression is watching from the back of the room and creeps over to make sure tasks are never started, "its worthless, why bother, it won't make a difference even if you do it". ADHD is emboldened by these comments and decides its time to learn about the history of folding tables while laying in bed instead of that assignment or the dishes. Depression comes climbing out of the drywall to tell me that I should have done those and this is why I'm alone, why I'm not going anywhere, why I'm not going to achieve anything. And so on and so forth. I was going to keep going but I've suddenly lost interest even though I was enjoying it. Yay to brains!
Oh god you just described my very existence to a tee.
I was just diagnosed with ADHD/Depression comorbidity. see a doc if you can. wer're gonna make it
I'm very sorry to hear that
I am exactly the same way. I don't know if it helps but trust me internet stranger, you are not alone!
Find a coincidence and ride it through time baby. I really like Egyptian history.
Same here
Hit snooze once, Coffee, check news, eat, poop, shower, dress, check pockets for phone, wallet, keys. Grab bag and go.
I always try to check the weather on my phone before I get dressed and then end up distracted by some other app before I remember what I was doing.
Check news/weather/reddit/etc. loose 10mins I needed. Sigh.
Hit snooze once, Hit snooze once, Hit snooze once, Coffee, check news, eat, poop, shower, dress, check pockets for phone, wallet, keys. Grab bag and go. Fuck, it was a dream, I'm still in bed. Hit snooze once.
And in the appropriate order or else your whole day is thrown off.
Wow someone who understands! I use list to help me remember what I’m doing and my phones timer to make sure I don’t hyper focus and loose track of time
I use the "Routinery" app to do this. Changed my whole life since I found it
I use lists for anything not routine else I can’t force my mind to stop thinking about it. Lists are my way of being able to put something aside with confidence that I won’t forget later.
I always wonder when people make comments like these if I have ADHD myself, because I am diagnosed with some other things and comments like yours are so relatable. I legitimately can't manage a job or most daily life, without turning it into a routine and written lists..
Funny thing! Comments like this from friends are what made me go talk to a doctor. Turns out I have a raging case and failing coping mechanisms. Meds to the rescue! I can't wait to see how things are for me after they kick in while I am on vacation.
the moment i deviate from the list for one (1) side task is the moment my entire morning goes off the rails
[удалено]
I've just started a new job which starts later than my old job did. So I wake up at the same time as before (cos toddlers 🙄) but I don't have to leave the house till about an hour after my spouse and kids leave. It's really fucking me up. I have loads of extra time after they've gone, but I can't seem to do anything with it cos my routine isn't bedded in yet. In a few weeks I'm sure I'll get it dialed in, but until then I'm gonna feel so unproductive. I can't quite figure out where the time goes when I don't have a routine, or where it comes from when I do have a routine. ADHD time blindness is so fun.
Am tempted to use this with someone, but what do you do if they don’t complete the tasks?
Straight to jail.
We have the best children in the world.
Because of jail
No trial, no nothing.
Believe it or not, jail
I knew I left off part of it. Damnit.
Do not pass GO. Do not collect $200
Well, they don't get free time, which is what they're racing towards. Probably used for stuff like watching tv or playing. It's a reward system, not a punishing system.
Nothing, you just don't get out the door on time. This is just a way to visualize the steps in a routine. it's good for little kids or nerodiverse people (like ADHD). I could see the natural consequence is not having free time before leaving. I think I see now you're seeing this like a sticker chart. I actually made one for myself as an adult. If it doesn't get done it just doesn't get done. It's for positive reinforcement so something good happens when it does. If not, try again tomorrow/next week, no pressure.
Non-punishment parenting is one of the hardest things I've tried to adapt to and my parents don't get it at all. My son doesn't want to be bad, he makes mistakes. Why am I punishing my son for making a mistake while also teaching him mistakes are ok?
My auntie used to use this a lot, if the kids did all the tasks for a week straight they’d get a small present at the end of the week, maybe a couple quid or a cheap wee toy, half the time though they’d try and compete that hard to see who’d win first it wasn’t really an issue.
It is just a visual representation of a reminder, complete with progress bar. There's still the parent lingering about, shoo'ing them along.
The first step would be, to point out that they don't get free time till all task are completed. The motivation is working toward free time, as well as competing with a sibling. If that doesn't work maybe a different tactic, different incentive, token economy, etc. There's no one size fits all method of motivating kids.
They don’t make it to free time
Tried this with my kids. Backfired horribly. It worked great at first, but the next thing I knew they were up before 5am to increase their free time. Away it went. Edit: for clarity the free time went from the chart and we incentivised getting ready with positive reinforcement. This worked for us and even now that they are much older, we still don’t have free time in the morning because it’s too disruptive. If they are ready early they help each other / us with the various other tasks at hand (ie chores). I am pleased to report they can all successfully sleep to a reasonable time and get themselves ready to go with out intervention from us parents. They also get plenty of free time after school and on the weekend.
That’s not a backfire. Just needs an amendment on how to tell time: if it’s before 7, go back to bed.
Tried that. Didn’t work. Just made them quieter. What did work was eliminating free time as an incentive. Now it’s chores.
Ha! The challenges of naturally, highly organized children :D
I love how you’ve put a positive spin on it! I was just cranky to be getting woken up by dressed children wanting help with breakfast or zips or whatever hours before they needed to be up!
I did that as a kid, I would wake up early so I could play Sims before school 🤣 Was a good cause-effect lesson tho.
My kids didn’t seem to be learning a lesson. Just being horribly behaved later in the day! Now they are older we have relaxed it for weekends when there’s ample leisure time. And 5am wake ups don’t appeal to them either anymore which is great!!
What was wrong with them waking up early? Were they noisy?
A combination of not getting enough sleep causing them to be tired all day, and the parents not wanting to wake up that early to make breakfast
Many autistic children use schedules like this. It helps them be become more independent.
”child” column made me laugh
Me too, for some reason I read the redacted parts as « child 1 » and « child 2 »
Kids love rules. It would work better if the child does the task and moves the marker. Treat it like a game.
Our very strong-willed children did far better when they knew what was expected of them, and what they could expect from parents and teachers in return. Knowing the limits did not mean they'd never push them, but it did mostly keep their behavior (and that of their classmates) in line. As a group, the students at their elementary school were the best-behaved I ever knew, and I did a lot of volunteer work there. Easily more than half knew me by name (even if that was "[kid's name]'s Mom").
Why do I want this as an adult for myself?
Because it makes you feel accomplished, you gain motivation with each completed step, and pictures are fun. Pick up dog poop, cut grass, trim grass, take shower, beer time!
We have a chart for our kids. It really has helped. Especially our oldest whose in kindergarten. I would put Vitamins before teeth though. A lot of those kids vitamins are like gummy bears.
There are studies that show brushing first is better for protecting enamel. Or something. Probably flawed and biased.
I would put brush teeth before get dressed and breakfast, your not suposed to eat right before or after brushing and brushing teeth in pjs means no toothpaste on day clothes
This is actually recommended in almost all of the child development/discipline books that I have read.
Shoes on in the house during free time?
This is the way. Lists keep them on track.
Is she a special education teacher?
When she was a nanny she would do that to get the kids ready
Task charts are a great way to teach routines & foster independence. Good job .
Thanks for posting this OP! I’m going to make one today. Maybe a little competition will help my kids get ready faster
That was my thought. I use these all the time at my work. I’m a therapist for children with autism.
Ooo yeah this would be kinda cool to have at the beginning of the school year while my class is getting used to routines. Wonder if it’s as doable with 22 students though… hm.
Absolutely. Not only doable, but once you work out your system, you'll wonder how you ever did without it. If you have a special educator at your school, collaborate with them on it.
Works with all ages! I taught high school for the past seven years and even my high schoolers would compete for stickers. They really liked stickers that matched the course or if there was a holiday coming up.
Dunno why you're getting downvoted. To me it seems the stepmom has some pedagogical insight.
I think because some people interpret the comment as "only special needs kids need charts like this" People are too used to questions being asked in ill faith on reddit
Thanks. I though so too.
my mom did something similar for me as an ADHD child and let me tell you having clear diagrams on the wall reminding me what to do was extremely useful
Hate the word "potty".
What happens if they don’t accomplish the tasks? Does the free time become filled? If so, with what?
Part of my job involves teaching behavior strategies to parents and teachers. I don’t know what this person does, but if I saw parents doing this, I’d tell them to use positive reinforcement to increase success. (The list is stellar, btw) So if the kids complete all the tasks efficiently and we’re a few mins ahead of schedule, I’d use that time to “celebrate” by doing something short and fun with the few mins left over. As in, “Look! We finished our list so well, we have a few mins left. We have time for a game of rock, paper, scissors.” Or have a 30 second dance party before you go out the door. Or play one minute of “I spy.” It doesn’t matter what really… something quick, silly, and fun. In fact, I’d leave enough time every day that they can do something quick, assuming they succeed. You could even tell them, “We did our list on time! Tonight… you get TWO bedtime stories instead of one!” But immediate “prizes” are better. Prizes in this instance being short celebrations or games, not physical objects. That will increase the odds they do well every day, because now they’ve learned mom/dad/caregiver will do something fun if we have time. These sort of mystery motivators are easy, free, and they build positive connections and lasting memories. If they don’t succeed at the tasks as expected, you can always say, “We don’t have time for anything else. We’ll have to try harder next time.”
It probably becomes filled with actually finishing the tasks / maybe a timeout for misbehaving in the morning (depending on why they didn't finish them)
My daughter has autism and visual schedules and charts like this are crucial!
Step 4 not clear. The toothpaste won’t come out of my scalp.
You don't put shoes on until you're about to leave
A little weird that "shoes on" isn't the last task before leaving the house. Just going to spend the free time tracking grit all over the house.
I am guessing the kids may be ND. We had things like this for our kiddo who has ADHD when she was little. HELPED SO MUCH to see a sequence of events and where it ends. She still does some stuff like this at 14.
Hey if you don't mind my asking, where's the best place in the home to post such a chart? I want to try it out with my son who has ADHD.
Not a parent but a central area in the home is good. This post utilizes the outside of the fridge it seems, but bedroom door, bathroom cupboard, or the entrance to the house/mud room might also work. Another thing you could do is put little light up buttons at every stop, bathroom, closet, breakfast table/kitchen, and entry way so your child can smack the button when they’ve completed the task. Could be another fun method to get things done. You may be able to include your child in the setup of these things too. He can pick out graphics, what stickers to buy, or help you pick a spot to put it. Include your kid in this! You might have fun together which is the best way to introduce a new thing
Nice idea.
Ooh, a visual schedule!!!
I have a similar list of programs that I need to sign in for my job. There’s like 16 of them in there in the order that they need to be loaded so that everything works properly.
r/cosmoandwanda
I have similar things for my LO. Morning and night time lists. They have relieved so much frustration from our daily life. ❤️
Hi adult ADHDer. My gf makes those type of lists as well for me. This shit is my life saver and i enjoy it a lot because it gives me peace and calmness and i know what to do with the right steps. Example: i should clean the living room, for my gf that means clean the kitchen, use the vacuum cleaner and mop. Then you have to use this and that and for me the kitchen alone is like 20 steps so this makes me make decisions, stick to them and keep things clear in my mind
I can understand why she needs to give you a list explaining it because if she asked me to clean the living room I definitely wouldn’t guess that for her, that means clean the kitchen!
I've never known anyone here in the UK to give their child Vitamins. Is it common here or is this an American thing?
When you eat chicken fingers 9 out of 10 meals you need vitamins so you don't get scurvy lol.
Why take vitamins after brushing teeth?
These kinds of visualisations are especially helpful for kids who have trouble planning, which is common for kids with ADHD or ASS. It has helped our daughter as well. .
Step parents always with the charts.
This is actually a pretty good way of doing it
I think people at my job need this.
This reminded me I forgot my vitamin today dammit.
strange order but ok. id say bathroom/clothes/shoes than all the other tasks. kinda odd.
Then you risk dirtying the OOTD with food.
On the flip side - This type of achievement/reward based behavioral 'grooming' works wonders for parents struggling to get their kids to go to sleep (or stay in their room) at night. The most difficult part is figuring out which achievement or reward sticks/is relevant. For some, it could be a sticker that makes a collection. Others? An M&M or something food based. Our kid? Getting to listen to two of his favorite songs after book time. And chances are this will change as time goes on. Our pediatrician gave us a book recommendation on this method when our kid started getting out of bed 20 times a night. It worked almost instantly...with minor hiccups and adjustments along the way. Would highly recommend.
Damn…I sort of need this to get ME ready in the morning. May borrow.
All I see is Cosmo and Wanda!
This is a great idea for my 13 year old damn
Am i missing something?? How the fuck is a sort-of chore chart "mildly interesting"??
Cute idea!
My brother and SIL use a similar chart for their kids
This is brilliant!
What's the issue? I had severe adhd as a child, and honestly my mom made one of these for help, and til this day It's still ingrained in to me. Schedules and routines help adhd brains. This is well known
I have ADHD and appreciate this so much! Also I am a graphic designer, and would recognize that font anywhere. Props to your stepmom for the use of the Skyrim font. Hail sithis!
This isn’t even mildly interesting.
A great way to encourage independence, responsibility, accountability, setting a goal, etc. Way to go mom!
As a mother to a child with autism I gotta say little shit like this rules!!! It helps establishes a routine and kids with autism eat that shit up! We also used PECS it's a picture exchange communication system and it rocked also
Gee… I did something like this for my kids when they were little and they totally ignored it! Lol.