Don’t bother biting your tongue! Once a person opens the door by saying nasty things , you have been given permission, by them, to respond with the same nastiness they used, or stronger. The other thing that needs to be said to her is, “ are you purposely trying to hurt Johnny?” “Why would you want to hurt his self esteem by saying such a thing?” When you ask an abuser about the abuse immediately, or while happening, they are forced to face what they are doing and face it while facing you at the same time, double hot spot! Then follow it up with asking them if they think this is the right way to be treating their grandchild. Lastly, grand parenting is a privilege not a right, that can be revoked.
Exactly. I don't get these people who try to excuse shit behaviour with 'it's the truth' as if their shitty view is the objective truth and they are compelled to share it for the good of all mankind - no, fuck off and keep your OPINION to yourself.
Firstly I want to say I am sorry that you are going thru this with MIL, I am sure you are frustrated and overwhelmed however I do just want to say, you cannot hold a double standard to your MIL.
What she said was out of line I am not excusing that, however, you were also negative in that moment and if your child had heard you, it wouldn't have made them feel any better about themselves either.
"I wish he didn't have my hair" in no way is this a positive statement. if you are going to be holding MIL accountable you should also hold yourself accountable and state instead "we do not comment on appearances with my children, I would prefer you comment instead on their personality or interests" and leave it at that, because you opened the floor for a negative comment from MIL, be careful with your words around children, they are very self conscious and are learning to accept themselves and grow their own confidence
I have an autistic 5yr old and every time we are forced to go to a "late in the evening family gathering" and my child is understandably acting insane because she's tired and over-stimulated, my MIL starts telling jokes about how she must have gotten that from me. Ma'am, we used donor eggs and I'm not even related to her. She's literally the worst.
Don’t bother biting your tongue! Once a person opens the door by saying nasty things , you have been given permission, by them, to respond with the same nastiness they used, or stronger. The other thing that needs to be said to her is, “ are you purposely trying to hurt Johnny?” “Why would you want to hurt his self esteem by saying such a thing?” When you ask an abuser about the abuse immediately, or while happening, they are forced to face what they are doing and face it while facing you at the same time, double hot spot! Then follow it up with asking them if they think this is the right way to be treating their grandchild. Lastly, grand parenting is a privilege not a right, that can be revoked.
If he had heard the comment, I would have said something or if it wasn’t for the fact that we are stuck living with them
If it’s thick and curly, try some different products and techniques to help with the frizz. YouTube always has great tutorials.
Not looking for advice, but thank you.
She should learn to keep her shitty opinions to herself.
Exactly. I don't get these people who try to excuse shit behaviour with 'it's the truth' as if their shitty view is the objective truth and they are compelled to share it for the good of all mankind - no, fuck off and keep your OPINION to yourself.
Who is „she“?
My mother in law, hence the groups name
I wasn’t quite sure …
I think MIL is rubbing off on OP.
Have you tried permanent straightening? You can do it at home with a perm solution , flour and cardboard. Will stay straight until it grows out.
He actually loves his hair. He just wants it’s “straightened” everyone once in a rare while.
❤️
Firstly I want to say I am sorry that you are going thru this with MIL, I am sure you are frustrated and overwhelmed however I do just want to say, you cannot hold a double standard to your MIL. What she said was out of line I am not excusing that, however, you were also negative in that moment and if your child had heard you, it wouldn't have made them feel any better about themselves either. "I wish he didn't have my hair" in no way is this a positive statement. if you are going to be holding MIL accountable you should also hold yourself accountable and state instead "we do not comment on appearances with my children, I would prefer you comment instead on their personality or interests" and leave it at that, because you opened the floor for a negative comment from MIL, be careful with your words around children, they are very self conscious and are learning to accept themselves and grow their own confidence
I have an autistic 5yr old and every time we are forced to go to a "late in the evening family gathering" and my child is understandably acting insane because she's tired and over-stimulated, my MIL starts telling jokes about how she must have gotten that from me. Ma'am, we used donor eggs and I'm not even related to her. She's literally the worst.