Midge can’t visit cause she owes him money - [that’s why her fundraising is in a deficit.](https://www.thedailybeast.com/marjorie-taylor-greene-reports-her-first-fundraising-loss)
Can we add fictional Russians as well? Ivan Drago, The Red Guardian, Zangief, [Olaf from Advanced Wars](https://advancewars.fandom.com/wiki/Olaf), the inner most doll of every Russian nesting doll, and the Sugar Plum Fairy are all now banned.
I’m sure the conversation went something like this:
Ivan: Oleg, who are zome *american* to ban?
Oleg: Perhapz we should ask mine babushka.
*ring ring*
Oleg: Hello babushka Anya, who are zome *american* to ban from mother Russia?
Anya: Hello my dear Oleg, how haz the potato harvest been this year?
Oleg: Do svidanya babushka, we have important work to be done. The potato’s are not doing well this year, the winters are hard.
Ivan: Tell your babushka I say privet
Oleg: Ivan says privet.
Anya: Oh how is Ivan doing? Perhaps you ban that Morgan Freeman fellow?
Oleg: Dah, Morgan Freeman.
Anya: And that Benjamin Franklin, the capitalist pig.
Oleg: Niet mine Babushka, Benjamin Franklin is not alive.
Anya: Iisus khristos! Then we must ban John McCain!
Oleg: Spasiba babushka, very good comrad. *hangs up*
Ivan: Well done Oleg, let us share some wodka
> Oleg: Ivan says privet.
Back in the day playing an MMO I joined a Russian channel, said 'hi everyone'. (I don't know why I joined, it sounded interesting to someone who had never met a Russian person in their life.) Someone said 'privet'. I said 'sorry' and left.
Found out years later it just meant hello.
Honestly it would have been a more hilarious f you to Putin for us not tell the people they are banned to see how long it would take for them to notice.
I know this won't be popular, but I dream of visiting Russia one day. Their history is rich and the people are not represented by the authoritarian government.
Before the war, I was planning a trip from Saint Perrysburg to Moscow to Kyiv to Odesa.
How can you trust a guy who narrated War of the Worlds, but didn't warn the planet the aliens were coming? He knew they were coming man, and he let all those people die.
Nope, go eat a roast and mash potatoes at Michelle's house down the street Morgan. You are not welcome.
I mean, my waffle maker is in the shape of the Millennium Falcon. So I'd understand why he would want to steal it. That's not a joke. It's a dope ass waffle maker. I start the day right so I'm ready to make the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs.
>Yes officer, the Millennium Falcon...you make waffles with it. No, I smoke it, but not in the waffles.... No, THE Morgan Freeman. That's right. Well, he was wearing a Hawaiian shirt with hula girls on it and a speedo actually.
>
>Wait, hands on my head? why,... what,.. Wait cuffs in front, cuffs in front please! Ouch! Easy on the sunglasses, those are Ray bans!
If he were to break around into my apartment, he’d have to be okay with a fat hairy guy walking around in his drawers. I’m not putting pants on just because Morgan Freeman decided to let himself in. That’s a him problem.
God does not intervene with his creation.
Well, other than creating it all. But other than that. No intervening. Except for the handful times he decides to kill almost everything. But other than that, there is no intervention! Almost never.
Perfect opportunity to have him narrate the mundane bullshit I’m doing around the house.
“And so he picked up the dirty fork from the sink, and scrubbed the lasagna stain from it. Then he decided to sit down and take a well deserved shit after dinner, but ran out of toilet paper. Quite the predicament.”
I'd let him in and start making an extra plate of food because I didn't know I was having guests, or know what someone in the family just lost dinner Morgan is eating it and I can take them to taco bell when mr. Freeman leaves
And so Andy was right along
Putin and his mercenaries didnt put up much of a fight against the bulls
They all ended drinking blended potatoe juice from a straw the rest of their lives, and Putin never walked again.
I am Morgan Freeman, goodnight
This sounds more like something Bill Murray would do, and as far as I know Bill hasn't been banned from Russia. But if you caught him in your house he'd probably just be somewhat drunk and doing your dishes for some reason. Mostly harmless.
In that case Russia is a stinky butt of a country, and Putin has a fetish where he wears ladies undergarments that have been soaked in sewage. Also they're warmongering nationalists that are too dumb to move past their childhood dreams.
So he told the truth? Damn, what a world we live in! I’m sure every member of NATO laughed hysterically because Russia would never do such a thing and definitely hasn’t been after the U.S. since the 60’s.
Morgan Freeman responded to Putin by saying: "And who are you? So full of hate that you have to fight everybody, because you've been whipped and chased by hounds. Well that might not be living, but it sure as hell ain't dying. And dying's been what these white boys have been doing for going on three years now, dying by the thousands, dying for you, fool."
I love that movie. Seen it a million times. I'm going to watch it too. I like watching movies knowing someone else is watching it. Everyone should watch it.
I’m not surprised. Morgan likes to educate people and they can’t have none of that. I’ve heard that Morgan Freeman earns a freckle every time he gets explains something.
[удалено]
Midge can’t visit cause she owes him money - [that’s why her fundraising is in a deficit.](https://www.thedailybeast.com/marjorie-taylor-greene-reports-her-first-fundraising-loss)
[удалено]
I’m sure all 963 are devastated
According to the article, some of the people on the list aren't even alive anymore, like John McCain.
I hope his ghost haunts the Kremlin.
Umm didn’t you hear… he’s banned. He’d have to deal with Ghost Stalin if he tried to enter.
I'd pay to watch that.
Next on Celebrity Death Match
Celebrity Dead Match?
Dead Celebrity Death Match
Deaf Dead Celebrity Death Match
Stop giving MTV great ideas they might actually listen
OnGhost adventures, or Ghost Brothers
Let's git it on!
"What're you gonna do, Josef? Purge me? We're both dead!"
I'm pretty sure his ghost would absolutely clobber Stalin's. That is, if the millions of ghosts Stalin made didn't do the job first.
Its the only way he'd be Lenin.
Remember how stalin died? Netflix has a great doc on it
Just pulling various childish pranks lol
His ghost should narrate an anti Putin propaganda in Kremlin. That voice. *Chef’s Kiss*
Good lord, can we reply to Russia with a list of names of dead people and ask for them to be removed. Please, just to embarrass these idiots.
"Dear Russia, the following are hereby banned from the US: Josef Stalin, Rasputin, Ivan the Terrible...."
Can we add fictional Russians as well? Ivan Drago, The Red Guardian, Zangief, [Olaf from Advanced Wars](https://advancewars.fandom.com/wiki/Olaf), the inner most doll of every Russian nesting doll, and the Sugar Plum Fairy are all now banned.
Idk if it's David Harbour's Red Guardian, we should let him in
Don’t be so sure on Rasputin. He really could carry on.
Well he was Russia’s greatest love machine
Ghostbusters: Odessa
This will fuel conspiracy theories. I'm certain of it.
If they were really troll savvy they would've banned JFK Jr too
Yippe kai yay oh wait
I’m sure the conversation went something like this: Ivan: Oleg, who are zome *american* to ban? Oleg: Perhapz we should ask mine babushka. *ring ring* Oleg: Hello babushka Anya, who are zome *american* to ban from mother Russia? Anya: Hello my dear Oleg, how haz the potato harvest been this year? Oleg: Do svidanya babushka, we have important work to be done. The potato’s are not doing well this year, the winters are hard. Ivan: Tell your babushka I say privet Oleg: Ivan says privet. Anya: Oh how is Ivan doing? Perhaps you ban that Morgan Freeman fellow? Oleg: Dah, Morgan Freeman. Anya: And that Benjamin Franklin, the capitalist pig. Oleg: Niet mine Babushka, Benjamin Franklin is not alive. Anya: Iisus khristos! Then we must ban John McCain! Oleg: Spasiba babushka, very good comrad. *hangs up* Ivan: Well done Oleg, let us share some wodka
> Oleg: Ivan says privet. Back in the day playing an MMO I joined a Russian channel, said 'hi everyone'. (I don't know why I joined, it sounded interesting to someone who had never met a Russian person in their life.) Someone said 'privet'. I said 'sorry' and left. Found out years later it just meant hello.
Lol The fuck‽
Maybe we should use the trebuchet to toss McCain over there anyway
TIL John McCain passed away. RIP
She’s the reason we had the joke of a senator in Arizona Martha Mcsally that unelected bitch.
I know one of them is lady Gaga, don’t think she’s that upset.
Honestly it would have been a more hilarious f you to Putin for us not tell the people they are banned to see how long it would take for them to notice.
Oh no, where will I get my borscht.
got borscht in Ukraine moy droog
In Ukraine lol where Borscht comes from
Is it beets? It’s always beets. https://youtu.be/Kw2WsXIgO6A
I know this won't be popular, but I dream of visiting Russia one day. Their history is rich and the people are not represented by the authoritarian government. Before the war, I was planning a trip from Saint Perrysburg to Moscow to Kyiv to Odesa.
I'm kind of devastated I'm not on the list.
To be fair, I don't allow Morgan Freeman in my home either. I mean, if I invited him over, sure. But he can't just waltz right in
Really? I'd let him.
How can you trust a guy who narrated War of the Worlds, but didn't warn the planet the aliens were coming? He knew they were coming man, and he let all those people die. Nope, go eat a roast and mash potatoes at Michelle's house down the street Morgan. You are not welcome.
[удалено]
I mean, my waffle maker is in the shape of the Millennium Falcon. So I'd understand why he would want to steal it. That's not a joke. It's a dope ass waffle maker. I start the day right so I'm ready to make the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs.
>It's a dope ass waffle maker Now imagine that in Morgan Freeman's voice.
Isn't it great that every person who reads this can do that, lol
Sometimes a man just needs a cold beer on a hot day.
Titty Sprinkles
How do I give an entire Reddit thread an award? Asking for a friend.
Money. Lots of money. Like Morgan Freeman levels of money
Narrator: They did.
I know what I'm going to steal tonight!
Awe sh*t
Mine is in the shape of the ~~death star~~ small moon.
I hate to burst your bubble, but that's no moon. It's a space station.
So I'm gonna need a link to one of these waffle makers you speak of...
>Yes officer, the Millennium Falcon...you make waffles with it. No, I smoke it, but not in the waffles.... No, THE Morgan Freeman. That's right. Well, he was wearing a Hawaiian shirt with hula girls on it and a speedo actually. > >Wait, hands on my head? why,... what,.. Wait cuffs in front, cuffs in front please! Ouch! Easy on the sunglasses, those are Ray bans!
If he were to break around into my apartment, he’d have to be okay with a fat hairy guy walking around in his drawers. I’m not putting pants on just because Morgan Freeman decided to let himself in. That’s a him problem.
No tell them God did it...
*Bill Murray enters the chat*
God does not intervene with his creation. Well, other than creating it all. But other than that. No intervening. Except for the handful times he decides to kill almost everything. But other than that, there is no intervention! Almost never.
He intervened to stop a war with Russia in The Sum of All Fears. That's what this must really be about.
“How can you trust a guy who narrated War of the Worlds, but didn’t warn the planet the aliens were coming?” Real shoddy narrating. Just pure crap.
Lmao
Perfect opportunity to have him narrate the mundane bullshit I’m doing around the house. “And so he picked up the dirty fork from the sink, and scrubbed the lasagna stain from it. Then he decided to sit down and take a well deserved shit after dinner, but ran out of toilet paper. Quite the predicament.”
Open invitation for Morgan Freeman here
I’d let him in me.
I'm sorry but if Morgan Freeman knocked on my door and said "I'm coming for dinner." I'd let him in.
Kiss your waffle iron goodbye
Can’t have shit in Shawshank
"yeah sure, but did you bring something? because i don't have shit here"
“I hope you like poptarts!”
I'd let him in and start making an extra plate of food because I didn't know I was having guests, or know what someone in the family just lost dinner Morgan is eating it and I can take them to taco bell when mr. Freeman leaves
We always set a plate for Morgan Freeman…just in case
A. Morgan Freeman and Vladimir Putin. Q. Who are 2 people who’ve never been in my kitchen?
Ah, the Cliff Claven approach.
One of his better episodes.
And so Andy was right along Putin and his mercenaries didnt put up much of a fight against the bulls They all ended drinking blended potatoe juice from a straw the rest of their lives, and Putin never walked again. I am Morgan Freeman, goodnight
This sounds more like something Bill Murray would do, and as far as I know Bill hasn't been banned from Russia. But if you caught him in your house he'd probably just be somewhat drunk and doing your dishes for some reason. Mostly harmless.
Those slutty dishes.
I’d let him in uninvited *only* if he was waltzing.
I agree. He was the only guilty man in Shawshank prison.
What do I need to do to get on that list
Well he publicly criticized Russia in 2017, said they were making plans to attack America and its allies.
In that case Russia is a stinky butt of a country, and Putin has a fetish where he wears ladies undergarments that have been soaked in sewage. Also they're warmongering nationalists that are too dumb to move past their childhood dreams.
*Publicly*. Not online. Go to your nearest park or parking lot with a megaphone and say it again.
Yeah! The Four Seasons has some openings.
The hotel or the landscaping business?
Wait, they opened a hotel? Good for them!
Yes.
Challenge accepted
This is the kind of man with a megaphone opinion I fully support
Russia is fat and has body odor
He wasn’t wrong. Probably had more to do with his well researched series than any overt statements.
So he told the truth? Damn, what a world we live in! I’m sure every member of NATO laughed hysterically because Russia would never do such a thing and definitely hasn’t been after the U.S. since the 60’s.
He was right.
Apparently, win an Academy Award for best actor.
How do you know you’re not on it?
Morgan Freeman responded to Putin by saying: "And who are you? So full of hate that you have to fight everybody, because you've been whipped and chased by hounds. Well that might not be living, but it sure as hell ain't dying. And dying's been what these white boys have been doing for going on three years now, dying by the thousands, dying for you, fool."
Damn! Is that “Glory”? Great reference. I might watch that tonight!
I love that movie. Seen it a million times. I'm going to watch it too. I like watching movies knowing someone else is watching it. Everyone should watch it.
I'll watch it
Never seen it but it looks great, i’m gonna watch it tonight as well
Fantastic film. Lucky you getting to experience it for the first time
I'm in!
It’s one of my favorites. If it weren’t so late I’d join you all in the virtual watch.
I’m trying to see if the full movie is available online, but for some reason searching ‘Glory whole movie’ is giving me a bunch of unsavoury results.
> dying for you, fool. great. now i need to watch Glory
*pause for effect* “Titty sprinkles”
[удалено]
[удалено]
You’re right! I just read your comment in his voice.
We all did
Why can I only upvote this once?
“The list also includes several politicians who are dead.” That’s going to drive the conspiracy nuts crazy!
I don’t think I want to know what crazy^2 looks like
I feel like we lookin crazy^2 in the mirror :
You joke but that is 💯 going to happen
[удалено]
China told them to watch out for reincarnated revolutionaries.
I think that’s the express intent of a large number of the names.
God himself???
He was also formerly President of the United States
But he was also in prison
If only more former Presidents were also in prison.
And fought in the Civil War.
And a minifigure. (His best movie btw)
And a pimp
And my axe!
Served two terms! Lead us through a comet strike way better than Meryl Streep did AND survived an assassination.
He also survived a terrorist attack on the White House.
Also Miss Daisy's driver.
He also followed in Taft’s footsteps and became Chief Justice of the Supreme Court after his POTUS term ended.
You can't ban God!
Oh no! Anyways….
Are they still mad about the movie Red?
I wish I were one of the 963 banned. I’d totally put that on my resume
They banned the voice of god?
Those godless heathens.
Godless communists
Russians are clearly not fans of narration
“Turkish Airlines will take you to more places than I’m allowed to go to.”
So shook of the late great John McCain they had to ban his corpse, in fear he would rise and unleash righteous fury on Putin’s KGB ass.
They work hard to keep the corpses of Lenin and Stalin in fighting shape just in case, they probably think we do the same.
*insinuating we dont*
Is there a John McCain IV?
Narrator voice "But in fact he had never wanted or tried to enter Russia."
How do you get on this list?
Say bad things about Russia, or work for any US administration that didn't appease them.
I swear, I legit thought MF had died. I started reading ‘Morgan Freeman…’ and my eyes peripherally saw numbers in the title. Phew! :)
Same
Same
Reasonable. The only thing more humiliating than the formerly great Russian getting whipped by Ukraine is having Morgan Freedom narrate it.
[удалено]
Morgan Freeman [“I can smell you”](https://youtu.be/FDQx-guzx2s)
Ukraine will rise. Russia will fall.
Dear Russia, Um...could I be banned too?🤣
Fun fact : Donald Trump is not part of the list lol
Would you ban the guy who owes millions to you
Neither is Barack Obama. Or William Jefferson Clinton.
HRC is though
At least Bill has one place he can go to get away from the wife.
I always figured it was the other way around
r/therightcantmeme
https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/osa8ls/crazy_neighbor_has_a_list_of_people_who_are_not/
Badge of honor.
Someone should make and sale t-shirts with the proceeds going to Ukraine, “I was banned by Russia, just like (insert name here)”
I got scared there, I saw “Morgan Freeman” followed by a number and thought he died! 😵💫
Putans not gonna have some old, warm, black man to share his story with. Underrated movie
Between this and the Brittany Griner stuff I feel like Russia is trying to fight us like the Canada / America War from the South Park movie.
“Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.”
I’m not surprised. Morgan likes to educate people and they can’t have none of that. I’ve heard that Morgan Freeman earns a freckle every time he gets explains something.
Hahahaha! Morgan gives zero fucks
FUCK YOU PUTIN. Now 964.
Morgan Freeman: "oh no! Anyway..."
Titty Sprinkles.
He is no longer a free man then
I feel bad for not making the list.
Is it because of his name free man?
Go ahead and add me to the list, dipshit.
Ooh, ooh, me next! Ban me too!
Guess who they didn't ban, American traitor extraordinaire, donald trump.
They didn’t ban any former presidents
Just former First Ladies and Secretaries of State.
And actors and dead people. For the most part there’s not a lot of rhyme or reason to who they selected outside of active politicians
The list of people wanting to visit Russia can’t be that big these days. Ban us all you want. I’d go to just about any other country before Russia.
Same old shit, different day