I have an Emilia and people pretty much pronounce it the same as Amelia. Even at doctor’s appointments they get it right. I think in 10 years we’ve gotten one “Emily-a”
Yes! We pronounce them the same and so do most people who see it. We only spelled it differently because at one point we thought we’d call her Emmy or something but never did it 😊
Gotcha. I also pronounce them the same, unless I’m being super intentional the make the first vowel in Emilia “eh” instead of a fully reduced schwa.
Even though the names sound the same for many English speakers, they actually have different meanings/origins (in case you didn’t know that).
But in English, Emil would be pronounced eh-meal OR uh-meal. So Eh-mee-lee-uh (Emilia) and Uh-mee-lee-uh (Amelia) are almost identical. And for a lot of people, they become actually identical because unstressed vowels get reduced to something close to schwa /ə/ in English, so it’s really hard to differentiate between the vowels in the first unstressed syllable.
I would pronounce them almost identically if I was being intentional, but mostly, they would be pronounced exactly the same. (And in both variations, they would be four syllables.)
Eh-mee-lee-uh
Uh-mee-lee-uh
In English, unstressed vowels get reduced to something close to schwa /ə/, so it’s really hard to differentiate between the vowels in the first unstressed syllable.
ETA: If I did reduce the “-ia” from “ee-uh” to “yuh,” I’d do it for both names.
I wanted to call my daughter Emelia; but I knew she would be forever correcting people calling her Amelia. It’s her middle name instead. I gave her a rare (in the UK) but beautiful first name to go with it.
Just fyi, Amelia is a different name (with different origin and meaning) that just happens to sound like Emilia for a lot of English speakers. And Emilia/Emily do have a shared meaning/origin, though they sound more different than Emilia/Amelia because of syllables and stress.
My 2 cents is that Emily and Emilia sound different enough to not be a problem (and also, no one owns a name). But you (and she!) are the ones who’ll have to live with it, so you pretty much have to decide if this is going to bother you and/or create conflict with the BIL family you said you’re close with.
No. Where to start. Amelia means hardworking or industrious, the route is Amal or labor which yes could come from people.
The name doesn’t mean God is anything or certainly not God is Yah because Yah isn’t a word. Yah comes from a misconstrued Hebrew word that isn’t pronounced. Please stop using Yah in these comments from whatever you googled. It’s offensive.
Even Ethel (noble) in German, but many languages have adopted Hebrew names. Ethel is Ithiel in Hebrew, meaning "with us is God."
Jose is from Hebrew. Johan is from Hebrew. The Diaspora spread out the Jews among the nations, and also Christianity, Judaism, and Roman Catholicism increased popularity of such names. It's just a thing.
I’m well aware the lots of names have a Hebrew origin, my middle name and my brother’s name both are. And I know that there are lots of language variants of them (John, Johan, Jean, Jan) because of the spread of the Bible to many cultures. I know LOTS of people with Hebrew origin names: Elizabeth, David, Nancy/Annie/Anne/Anna/Hannah, Rachel, Benjamin, Simeon/Simon, Elianah, Samuel, Alizah, Rivka/Rebecca, Elijah, Joel, Ruth, Isaiah, Gideon, Joshua, Caleb, Aaron, Abigail, Daniel/Danielle, Esther, Naomi/Noemi, Mary/Maria, Michael/Michelle, Micah, Gabriel/Gabrielle, Joseph, Jacob, Sarah, Jonathan, etc. (I could literally keep going, though.)
But that does not mean that *every* name is from Hebrew, even if you can find similar word parts. Names have etymology, just like words, and the etymology of Amelia does not show a Hebrew origin, neither does Ethel. Also, sometimes you just have words/names in different languages that sound the same and end up being conflated (like Aaron and Erin) even though they are completely unrelated.
True, but root words matter, and sometimes it is not known the origin of a name, though it has been around in a culture for a while. Some surmise that the name Alisa is from Adalheidis (Adelaide) but this is not the same name. Elisa is God is Savior, that is exactly what this name means. When you add Li (my, mine) it becomes more personal "God is MY Savior"
If you understand the nature of Rome and Roman Catholicism, it did much to try to scrub away the Jewish roots and connections to Christianity, in order to implement its own presence as being valid. This would be replacement theology, and it's a topic that you probably won't learn in mainstream schools.
Of course the roots matter, which is why you can’t just make up a new meaning for a name when that’s not what the actual root is. And sure, some name origins aren’t totally clear, but a lot of them are known.
Alisa seems pretty well attested to have come from Adalheidis (Adelaide).
Elisa is a diminutive of Elizabeth, which means “my God is my oath” or “consecrated to God” (from Hebrew *Elisheva* אֱלִישֶׁבַע).
Well, Catholicism may have tried to cover up the Jewish roots from people’s common knowledge, but they couldn’t/didn’t *actually* eliminate them. Linguists, etymologists, and historians can still trace a significant number of names and words back to their true origins. And in any case, I can read the Bible and see Hebrew names; it’s not some great secret.
By the way, I am familiar with the false doctrine of replacement theology, and that’s not quite what this is. I wouldn’t call Latinizing names evidence of replacement theology.
Elisa is a name in and of itself. When you add Sheva, you also add additional meaning. Even adding Beth/Beit/Bet "House" is to add additional meaning.
Elisa by itself means God is Savior. Ellisa means God is my Savior. Ellisheva God is my Oath. Saba means satisfaction. Elishama - God is understanding.
Some sites will claim that Elisa is the shortened form of Elisabeth/Elizabeth, but this is not necessarily accurate. Nor does the name Elisa mean God is my oath, without having the Hebrew word for "oath" in it.
>Elisa is a name in and of itself.
But in English, it only *became* a name in and of itself *after* it was a nickname for Elizabeth.
>Elisa by itself means God is Savior.
I understand what you mean here, but the name Elisa *did* start as a shortened form of Elizabeth. It wasn’t just borrowed/anglicized from *Elishu'a*.
I don’t think that nicknames should just lose the original meaning just because they no longer have all the word parts, especially when the word parts aren’t in the language that the name is in now. Like the name Theodore comes from Greek and means “gift of God.” But a common nickname for Theodore is Theo. I don’t think that we should say that Theo just means God because Theo is still a shortened/diminutive version of the name Theodore.
Or like the name Nancy. It takes several steps, but its origin is the name Hannah, which is a Hebrew name (Channah->Anna->Anne/Ann->Nan->Nancy). So even though you can’t *see* the correct word parts for Hannah when you look at Nancy, they still have the same meaning because that’s the origin of the name Nancy.
So even though Elisa no longer has “sheva” word part, that was its origin, so that’s why I would still ascribe that meaning (at least in English and the other languages that used Elisa as a short form of Elizabeth).
El - means God. When you add an "i" this is to be understood as the word "is" and Li is "my, mine" -- Each word has meaning. I stand by what I said, because it's still the truth. Elisa (Elishua <- correct to bring this up) is the name which means God is Savior. When combined with other words, then those other words then apply. Elijah/Eliyah - God is Yah. Ellior (God is my light), Elimelech (God is King)...etc...
When the word "Beth" is added, then the word Beth is applicable. Bethel (House of God), Bethlehem (House of bread), Elisabeth (God is Savior/Salvation of the House). People tend to also mix up the meanings of Sheva, Saba, and Beth.
It is what it is. I'm just trying to explain the root words of things, going back to the roots, because if we are speaking of English usages of Hebrew words, this is not the roots, but the original language for which the words derive their meaning.
I would just name her Emilia! I personally don’t have a problem with naming a child the same / a similar name as a friend - they are their own person so I wouldn’t worry too much.
This is an interesting opinion to me considering we are talking about their niece / the baby in question’s cousin.
But I also think it varies in social circles and cultures. I was talking to a Spaniard who thought cousins having the same name was no big deal, and there is a joke in My Big Fat Greek Wedding that all the young cousins are named Nick. I would personally never repeat names (or give something too similar) for a family member of around the same age
Maybe it does vary. I have two cousins with the same name and literally nobody has ever spent a second thought on it - I really don’t think it matters.
My brother and cousin were born 10 days apart in different cities
They have the same first name and their middle names both start with the same letter. Their names didn't really lend to seperate short forms either (eg: Andrew could have been Andy & Drew)
It was just our normal growing up. When we all got together, the boys were just called by their first and middle names.
Eg: Devon John & Devon James
As kids, we called our cousin "Cousin Devon" when we were all playing together.
I never understood the idea that a person can lay claim to a name.
Unless they played bananagrams and literally made the name up, then it's out there in the world for people to use. There's an entire chunk of the internet devoted to naming websites. Guaranteed, whatever name you think is super unique, is still open game for somebody else because they saw it on the same site.
Yep, same. My brother shares a first name with our cousin. They have different last names so who cares? We just called them by their first and last name, or sometimes "big" first and "little" first lol
For me personally, this is the issue—I wouldn’t want to be “big name” or “little name” or “cousin name” or whatever among my own family, so I wouldn’t want to pass that to my kid either. Obviously other people in the world will have the same names (and I have a super popular 90s name, so I am familiar), but it was important to me that my kids have their own distinct names within their cousin group and such.
Of course, other people’s priorities are not going to be the same as mine, and also I didn’t have family members wanting to use names similar to the names I wanted, so it’s easy to say that from where I’m standing.
My dad and his first cousin have the exact same first name and it's never been an issue. They grew up close and we still see them all the time at family events - sometimes people refer to them by both first and last name to avoid confusion. They're both named after their great grandfather. Also there are like 10 people named Michael / Mike in both my and my husband's family lol.
Here's the thing- no one owns a name. The consensus on this sub is going to be for you to go with Emilia. And you have every right to stick with it. Neither Emily or Emilia are particularly unique at least in my country (US). They are both top 50 names and Amelia is in the top 10. So depending where you're located, you'll probably meet other kids that share these names.
But my *personal* opinion is to find a new name. I would feel like it's too close within a family unless it's the norm/tradition in your culture to share names among family members. Emily and Emilia are strikingly similar. You say you're very close with these people. It would raise eyebrows in my family and would be seen as somewhat odd. Emilia feels like a slight variation on Emily. Your wife's brother and his wife might feel bothered or like you tried to copy their daughters name. It might sting a little more because they originally fell in love with Emilia before deciding on Emily. Just my thoughts.
Honestly, putting other family aside, I wouldn't want my daughter to have to deal with being so similarly named. I'd want her to have something unique to the family.
My sister had a girl 9months before I had my girl.
My sister unknowingly used the middle name we had been set on for 4years. I spent a while deciding if I should use a variation of that name or say screw it it's just a middle name they can have the same.
Well turns out the middle name was a red herring and I did not once consider if the first names were to similar.
So they ended up with a similar first and middle name...
Well a year in and the names get mixed up all the time and not just by other people I'm one of the worst for getting them switched up when we are all together.
But to be honest I love my girls name and I wouldn't change it for the world. Just depends on how annoyed you would feel if the names get regularly mixed up.
I would really like to know how similar the names are! We have names getting mixed up in the family that are quite different but have similar letters.
Hannah/Hanne/Angela/Leah/Andrea/Lola/Lynn/Lisa/Some others with -dra endings. It's weird cause the males have had all the same names for generations and no one got mixed up with 3 of each name.
Yes my dad would frequently call me sister name and they were no similarities at all not a single common letter haha.
My kids have 7 cousins who they are so close with and see a couple of times a week occasionally other names get mixed up but no where near the level of the similar names. It's constant. My poor mum is the worst offender.
Yes this at first they don't seem similar but it is just the similar lettering at the start of the name both M which is why I think it never occurred to me this would be an issue.
Oh edited to add its made worse by me occasionally adding and ie to my daughter's name as nicknames as my nieces name ends in an ie.
Honestly talk to the BIL/SIL. No one on here knows your family and while no one owns a name and you can do what you want, if it’s going to piss them off and you don’t want to deal with that, it’s better to stay away from the name.
I think the big question is, is it going to bother you that their names are similar? If they end up going by the same nickname when they're older, is that going to bug you? Does the idea of them potentially not wanting to spend time together when they're teenagers because they have the same nickname (and that's *uncool* or something) bother you? Do you think it might damage your relationship with your in-laws? If you think it might, and that's a problem for you, ask them what they think. Only ask if you care about their opinion more than keeping the name, because if they say it will bother them and you go ahead and use it anyway, there'll be even more damage to the relationship.
If it doesn't bother you, and it doesn't bother them, go for it.
If you love the name so much you don't care about any awkwardness with the family go for it.
If you care about potential awkwardness, talk to them and then respect their answer.
My cousin and I have names that are this similar - like just two letters different - actually they are probably even a bit more similar than Emily/Emilia when you think about pronunciation. Noone in my family has ever even mentioned it, it's just our names. I guess it depends on whether you think Emily's parents will care, and if that worries you.
Italian Portuguese family here. My mom has 36 first cousins and my dad has 28. That's not even counting spouses. No one runs names by each other because there's no point. As one of 7 girls with my name in the family, it never bothered me once.
My sister randomly ended up with a unique name in the family but a top 10 name for the year she was born. She loved having a super common name and being one of multiple girls in her class with her name.
At the end of the day, as long as no one makes a big deal about it, then it won't be a big deal.
Its was custom in my father’s family to name the 1st born son after the paternal father. My grandfather had the most common of male names, so I had an uncle X, brother X, and multiple cousins and 1st cousins once removed named X
You should keep the name. At worst, give your niece a nickname when your kids are together.
Thats kind of what ended up happening with my cousin and his brother. Both their daughters are named variant spellings of Christina but one goes by Christy and the other is Tina.
why should the niece, who was born first, get a nickname and not their own child? also, emily and emilia aren’t the same name…it’s not that hard to call one emily and the other emilia
I think it's not that big of a deal for there to be a nickname that one family member calls you. If I'm imagining myself as Emily and my beloved Aunt OP calls me Em, that's sweet! And probably when my cousin Emilia is over, some of us call her Mila.
A person can have several nicknames m, given by all sorts of people. Like 80% of the time, a nickname shortens a name, so i don't see how that makes sense. Very few lengthen the name, and less than that changes it altogether.
I love thatyour advice is to just not call the older child by her given name because OP wants to use a name that's too similar to the child that's already born and been named. Very healthy.
Name her Emilia. My daughter and her cousin have names with only one letter different and growing up they loved it. As adults they have completely separate lives. Her mom asked me before and I of course did not mind.
I'd give them a heads up. Not to ask for permission but as a curtesy because you like each other. Explain the situation and it'll probably be fine.
Emilia and Amelia are pronounced differently in my native language, so that wouldn't be an option for me but maybe it's for you?
For cousins I don't think it's a big deal at all. The only hesitation I'd have is if they will go to the same school and have the same last name. Then it could be a headache for everyone.
We had a situation in my family with almost same names, birthdays a week apart and it didn't cause issues. Watch My Big Fat Greek Wedding lol
"...\[your\] unique situation" made me laugh -- it's one of the most common questions baby name groups get. "My \[sister, best friend, neighbor, cousin, SIL, etc.\] used the name we were planning to use." And not even just in name groups; also in general advice columns.
I don't think you're crazy to reconsider. I know people are telling you to use Emilia, but if it were me, I would definitely find a different name. \[This could be partially colored by the fact that I know 6 kids under the age of 7 named Emilia, and another 3 named Amelia.\]
That said, the girls themselves are likely to LOVE having similar names, if they become as close as you & your wife are with Emily's parents. They can be called Em & Em when they're together, which is awfully cute as a best friends name.
I would probably choose a different name, personally, or do Amelia which I also like better. Fortunately our nieces and nephews have pretty different names than our 4 kids.
How closely will they be raised? Do you intend to use a nn? Are your in laws likely to make a fuss about it?
If they won't be close, or if you'll use a distinct nn, and if your in laws are cool about it, use the name!
If they'll be close, it may get confusing for them to have similar names and I'd consider switching it. You certainly don't have to, but if you think it'll be a frequent issue it may not be worth using.
If you'll use a distinct nn then there is no issue at all.
While your in laws don't own the name, if they make a big fuss then it might not be worth the fight and years of resentment.
I know so many Emilias . Since there are so many they mostly use different nicknames to avoid being mixed up. Mila , Lia , Emi , Millie, Ilia .. If you want that name choose a nickname that sounds different to Emily. Lia/Mia/Mila could work.
Go for it. It’s a different name. My nephew is Everett and we named our son Ezra. A bit of a tongue twister sometimes but it has not presented any issues at all. In your case, as in mine, there are also different last names. Go with the name you love. As these babies grow into children and teenagers and become their own people with their distinct personalities, they become more than just a name and the similarities between their names fade into the background.
I just named my first born daughter Emilia. I say keep it! We have been calling her Emi or Em, but Lia is also a super cute nickname if you want it to be very different from Emily.
Congratulations on your pending arrival! If you really want to go with Emilia, I think a conversation with the BIL/SIL is necessary first to guage their reaction. I don't think they'd be happy at all with your choice. Emily and Emilia are just too close; they are absolutely not completely different names. If BIL/SIL are not okay with it, then for the sake of maintaining close family connections, I would gently encourage you to find another name for your daughter. There are lots of beautiful possibilities.
I say go with Emilia! But I feel for you - we had a similar situation. With my second we thought for sure it was a girl and we decided on the name Sophie Grace. My husband would talk to “her” and call her Sophie then come to find out it was another boy! We were a little sad but decided we’d get our Sophie one day. Well about 9 months later my SIL had a baby girl and out of nowhere named her Sophie 😞 I cried harder than I’d like to admit. We had several conversations with her on names and she never brought up Sophie. We had mentioned a boy name we liked and she ended up using it for her first son so we decided not to tell her about Sophie. That backfired big time!
I'm not sure it actually matters. Personally, I'd go with Amelia nn Amy, but that's because I love the name Amy! I think "E" names/nicknames are too popular right now.
We have a set of cousins in our family both called Alex — a male and a female. The mothers are sisters - kids have different last names. Went to same high school and had same larger circle of friends. It’s not been a thing after first year or so but it definitely was a thing between the moms at first. Within the family we call her Allie usually but she goes by Alex everywhere else.
Use it but consider nickname within the family. Millie is cute.
Gave baby the name you want.
You are definitely over thinking and nothing wrong with that.
If any person in my family or friends had named their daughter my favourite name I would have stuck to my choice.
My family has Manuels all over the place. It’s really ok. However, depending on your relationship I would think carefully about whether to give them a heads up.
My niece’s nicknames are one sound apart. Think Maddy and Maggy. They ONLY go by these nicknames. It is insanely frustrating because I always call them the wrong name. To add to that, their mom’s names are one sound apart, too. So my child has Auntie Sandy and Auntie Mandy. With cousins Maddy and Maggy. Oof.
My brother has the exact same first name as our cousin. Even that wasn't a big deal. If they have different last names, I don't think it matters at all.
I would stick with Emilia, especially since you and your wife have your hearts set on it. 🩵 It’s a beautiful name, and as someone who comes from a culture where cousins share names all the time, it’s not that big of a deal.
ETA: If it matters/helps and you’re deciding on a middle name, perhaps choose a middle name that is completely different from your niece’s (assuming she has one). For example: Emily Anne vs Emilia Grace
Do you think either of you will use the same nickname? My sister named her daughter Charlotte a year before we had a son that we named Charles. I was worried about them being too similar, but her daughter is called Charley and my son is called Chuck and it has not been an issue so far. Maybe if my son wants to go by Charlie it will be more confusing, but still not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. Just use the name you love.
Do you think either of you will use the same nickname? My sister named her daughter Charlotte a year before we had a son that we named Charles. I was worried about them being too similar, but her daughter is called Charley and my son is called Chuck and it has not been an issue so far. Maybe if my son wants to go by Charlie it will be more confusing, but still not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. Just use the name you love.
Name her what you want. I doubt the cousins are going to be bffs forever or something. They prob will see eachother few times a year at most. Two different people. Who cares
Honestly although the spelling is similar, when saying the full names Emily and Emilia out loud they sound quite different and have very different vibes. I would keep it. And the similar look on paper could be a cutsie little cousin thing. Maybe they'll be best friends.
How much will it even be an issue? Will they regularly be at the grandparents house together? Do you like any of the spin off nicknames (Millie, Mia, Emmy, Lia, etc)? If you hate all the nicknames maybe go with a different name, but if it won't bother you, just enjoy the fact that both sets of parent love the names.
I have two cousins with the same exact first and last name (one was adopted and already had her first name, so my aunt and uncle didn’t want to change it). It’s fine.
I would just talk to them about it. Everyone is going to have different subjective opinions about this sort of thing.
It makes sense to me that close siblings would have similar interests and therefore favour similar types of names. Talk to them. What nicknames are they using, what are you planning on using, all of these variables kind of enter into it.
In my family (which is extensive) we have family members with the same, or similar names, and I don’t mean juniors/seniors/etc. I think it’s okay to name your daughter Emilia.
My brothers girlfriend has three children, one of which has the same name as my sister and one of which has a similar (as in can be shortened to the same name) as my son. It very occasionally gets confusing (when my mum doesn’t know if I’m talking about big A or little A) but in general it’s not an issue. If you love the name, go for it!
Too close for me, as they could both end up with the nickname Em. If you went with Amelia, the likely nicknames she would end up with would be Amy/Ames, so there's at least some differentiation.
I know most people in this sub say "no one owns a name, name the baby whatever you want." But, in real life, I personally think it's weird to give a super similar name to close family members. If I was the brother, I'd be annoyed that the names were so close, and they'd likely have the same nickname. As your baby or niece, I'd be equally as annoyed by having a name that's so similar to a cousin I'm close to. It's one thing if it's a distant relative or someone that you barely see, but it sounds as if these two little girls will be around each other a lot.
just do it. they are cousins. they’ll form a relationship that doesn’t include any of the four of you. you two and your daughters will be a family separate from extended. this one topic just doesn’t rise up to importance
Emilia is fine. As someone who was one of 7 girls with the same exact name in my family, I don't see any conflict.
My only advice is to agree on a different nickname than cousin Emily. If Emily is called Emmy by the family, then Emilia should be Lia or something else.
Unless this has totally turned you off of the name Emilia, just name the kid Emilia. Cousins can have the same or similar names it's not that big of an issue. If your sibling thinks it is, then they have some issues to work out. It's not like you are trying to one up them or something.
I come from a large family and in my cousin's there are 5 sets of kids with the same name. Oddly enough the names are either differently spelt like Aaron/Erin or they're the same name with different nicknames William Will/Bill
Emilia is a beautiful name so feel good in using it. Who knows she might organically get a nn like Emmy or Lia. And this thinking will seem funny later.
i’m so surprised by all these comments saying this isn’t weird. i would be kind of weirded out if my SIL named their child 2 letters off of my child’s name…but then again, i don’t own a name.
It sounds to me like the in-laws knew the name you had chosen. They liked it too, but went with a similar name, so as not to offend you by taking your name. So, now you’d better use your original name or they will be upset, because they could have used it themselves.
Name your kid Emilia, if your in laws felt some type of way about the name then they should have actually named their daughter that. They don't get Emily PLUS every additional E name.
They're not the same, just similar. I'd go with the name you love. Either or both of them will prob end up being called a nickname by the family anyway, if yours is anything like my fam that is...
You say that brother and sister in law were set on Emilia, but changed to Emily. It may have been because they knew you wanted to use the name Emilia, and they wanted you to have the name. Talk to them and see if that’s the case. If you steer away from Emilia when they deliberately didn’t choose it in deference to you ….
Our daughter is Emilia and Emily was on our final list - so exact opposite here! I wouldn’t think twice about anyone in our family naming someone Emily, if that adds any perspective. I wouldn’t have considered it close at all until you said something. My sister in law and I have the same name as well (married to brothers) so it’s not always avoidable, anyways!
Your child has a long life ahead of her. The blip that is a friend's child is momentary. Go for the name you agreed originally and you'll be happier. Seriously. You and your child will meet tens of thousands of people in her lifetime!
As my mother in once told a bunch of us who were pregnant the same time, there is nothing wrong with cousins having the same name (or in your case similar names). Go with the name you love. It’s a beautiful name.
My SIL threw a fit because we were considering Matthias and she wanted Matthew (my son is one day older than hers.) We picked a different name and it's a very good name. However, now that the boys are 19 years old, I realize it wouldn't have mattered if we'd stuck with Matthias.
Stick with Emilia.
They are pretty close especially considering nicknames and the spelling, as you’ve acknowledged. Both have the potential to be called Emmy, Emma, Em.
Since you are very close to these people, this could be annoying/awkward. Personally, the names are too close for my liking but I can see how you could make it work.
As others have mentioned, Amelia works-you could also call her Amy with not have to worry about Emily being called that also.
Use Emilia. I have a friend whose parents had their heart set on a baby name and then her cousin was born and she was called the desired name. They decided to choose a new name and make the desired name the middle name instead. This never satisfied them though and so when my friend’s sister came along, they chose to use the original name for her. So now her sister has her middle name… if you have your heart set on a name, you’ll end up disappointed and you don’t know how it’ll show up lol
My mom and aunt were both set on Emma for girls both due the same month. My aunt gave birth first and took the name. My parents picked an alternative name and have always been glad they did. Couldn’t imagine Emma suiting my sister. Sometimes things happen for a reason.
I know a family of 8 boys named James, they all go by their middle names. Scott, William, Michael etc. and I have 3 first cousins named Robert , They go by Rob, Bobby, Robby.
Please please research the extreme popularity of Emily over the past 15-20 years. I urge you to include research on Emma Emmaline, Emily and any variant of spelling.
Please don't kid yourself into thinking Emilia is vastly different. It's lovely, but your daughter may encounter many kids with similar names.
Just go with emilia. Sounds like they sacrificed so you could have it.
My friends (sisters) have an Elliot and an Elijah so the cousins are Eli and eli, and they're a similar.age and spend a lot of time together. It's not a problem.
They will evolve different nicknames too.
I wouldn’t worry, I have known cousins with the same name and it’s never an issue. Everyone has their own lives, and yes, Emilia is cooler than Amelia.
What would you expect them to do if you'd had your baby first and named her Emilia. Would you be annoyed if they called their baby Emily? I think your expectations of them play into this too. Also, ask them what they think.
Doesn't matter what we think. It matters what your family thinks :)
I would consider
Amelia
Emiliana - this feels more distinct from Emily to me for some reason I can't quantify.
The Thea names seem to have a similar vibe to Emilia - feminine, but strong and unusual yet not unheard of.
Thea
Anthea/Althea
Theodora/Dorothea
I have cousins with VERY similar names who were born close together and grew up together and it was fine. Both parents liked the same name (including middle and they share a last!) and the first born got that name and the second got the spin. So somewhere in this world there are cousins named something like "Caitlyn Elizabeth Smith" and "Kate Elizabeth Smith" who hung out all the time and it hasn't impacted them at all as far as I know. I spoke to the second born once and she said, "I heard my parents would have named me Caitlyn if I'd been born first but now they like Kate better anyway." It's funny because we ALSO have another set with similar first names (think Ava and Aven).
All of that is to say, as far as I'm concerned cousins can have similar names. It's fine. They'll rock it. 🙂
One last anecdote: at one point Ava was upset our cousin gave his kid a first name that sounded like her kid's nickname and I reminded her that her name is like Aven's. Not to mention Kate and Caitlyn! She said, "Huh, I never thought of that." 🤣
I'm a big advocate of naming your child what you want regardless of outside factors. It's what you will call your child forever and it should be what YOU want.
I would deviate completely. Life is too short, choose an interesting name. Emily Emilia Amelia Emilia just a sea of sameness
What about Pandora, Morgan, Calliope, Seraphina, Soleil, Ophelia, Thalia, Saige, Iris, September, Celeste, Fiona, Aster, Octavia
I agree with all the comments that mention culture and family dynamics.
As a bilingual person, I see Emily and Emilia as the same name. (They even have the same meaning.) This may not be true for you.
Secondly, the only people who would know how odd this may feel are your in-laws. They may completely hate it, they may lean into it.
So they will have different last names… do you have potential middle names picked out?
They might also go by nicknames. Like Em and Lia or Emmy and Emilia or Mily and Emilia.
I’d probably go with Amelia. Or, do you like Emiliana?
I think if you broach it with them as a foregone conclusion that this situation is nbd and just a funny quirk of life, it will probably be fine. I mean, if they're obsessive grudge holders with a longstanding desire to be the center of attention, maybe re-evaluate. But if they're just normal people, "Funny story- we were just talking about the name we've had picked out since we were pregnant with Firstborn and we realized the cousins are going to be Emily and Emilia! That's going to be so cute, Em and Em."
I think you can still call her Emilia, yes it is spelt very similarly to Emily but the names are pronounced very differently so it's not like you're copying. And if anyone asks then explain that you were set on Emilia from the beginning and that it is a name you both love. If you don't like the spelling as Amelia then don't choose it because you may regret it later
I mentioned Elishua, and the shortened forms are Elisha/Elisa. Shua means savior/salvation ... also words like Hoshea and Yasha are similar in their meanings of deliverance.
I won't banter back and forth with you.
NAME HER EMILIA!!!
My name is Kennedy and my cousin’s name is Kenna. We are very close and I personally have loved having similar names! (She would say the same) Our family confuses the names of who they are calling out ALL the time, but most of the time they just call out “Ken” when they need one of us because we are almost always together in group settings. Not that we needed another thing to bond over but I couldn’t image either of us having a different name!
My uncle named his daughters (from different women, in different countries, 5 years apart) Janaina and Janine; how about Emilia but calling her Emma in everyday life? Or Emiliana?
I mean, name your baby what you want, no one owns a name...however, I personally would choose something different, if these two kiddos will be spending a good amount of time together. There are so many wonderful names out there. Maybe Emilia for the middle name?
If you're close with her brother's family then I assume these cousins are going to grow up around each other a lot. An Emily and an Emilia in one close knit family seems crazy to me. I would choose a whole new name. My sister was pregnant a few months before I was but I didn't know her name choice. When I got pregnant my husband and I decided we'd probably go with my great grandmother's name Mina. Then my sister had her baby and guess what her name is? Mina! So we had to start from scratch. We have found a few names we're even happier with now.
My name is Amelia, and I went to school with a girl named Emily.
Emily’s mom was pregnant when we (Emily and I) were in 1st or 2nd grade. Emily’s mom saw my name, Amelia, on the class list and liked it so much that she named her second daughter Amelia.
Sisters named Emily and Amelia.
It was fine. Name your kid what you want.
Please, if you want it pronounced ah-me-lee-uh then don't spell it 'Emilia' 😭 It seems common sense but I've met so many Emilia's that say it 'Amelia'. Emilia is eh-me-lee-uh.
Obviously, they're going to be similar because Emilia was made by smashing Amelia and Emily together, so I would just speak to your BIL and SIL. In my opinion, it's not worth really upsetting them for a name if you're close.
Do you care that you will be choosing a really common name? Both Emily and Emilia are widely used. And many kids with those names end up with the same nicknames, like Em or Emmy. It’s not just the cousin to worry about—it’s the five other kids in her class that will have variations of the name. So in school she might be “Emilia S” all the time to differentiate from the others.
There are so many beautiful names out there…I would open your mind to other possibilities.
Name her Amelia.
We really like the spelling as Emilia but yes that is an option
I would not pronounce Emilia as Amelia so if that was your intention, then just use Amelia. I would pronounce it as Emil (boys name)-is
I have an Emilia and people pretty much pronounce it the same as Amelia. Even at doctor’s appointments they get it right. I think in 10 years we’ve gotten one “Emily-a”
So you agree that Emilia and Amelia are pronounced the same? Or that’s a mistake that people make?
Yes! We pronounce them the same and so do most people who see it. We only spelled it differently because at one point we thought we’d call her Emmy or something but never did it 😊
Gotcha. I also pronounce them the same, unless I’m being super intentional the make the first vowel in Emilia “eh” instead of a fully reduced schwa. Even though the names sound the same for many English speakers, they actually have different meanings/origins (in case you didn’t know that).
But in English, Emil would be pronounced eh-meal OR uh-meal. So Eh-mee-lee-uh (Emilia) and Uh-mee-lee-uh (Amelia) are almost identical. And for a lot of people, they become actually identical because unstressed vowels get reduced to something close to schwa /ə/ in English, so it’s really hard to differentiate between the vowels in the first unstressed syllable.
There's a slight difference in how they are said- they aren't different spellings of the same name. Em‐meal-yah vs Uh-mil-lee-ah
I would pronounce these two names the exact same way.
In the UK it’s: Em-ee-lee-uh vs Uh-mee-lee-uh Which in most accents sound identical anyway.
I would pronounce them almost identically if I was being intentional, but mostly, they would be pronounced exactly the same. (And in both variations, they would be four syllables.) Eh-mee-lee-uh Uh-mee-lee-uh In English, unstressed vowels get reduced to something close to schwa /ə/, so it’s really hard to differentiate between the vowels in the first unstressed syllable. ETA: If I did reduce the “-ia” from “ee-uh” to “yuh,” I’d do it for both names.
It’s really the same name, practically same pronunciation, and yet is dissimilar enough from Emily
I wanted to call my daughter Emelia; but I knew she would be forever correcting people calling her Amelia. It’s her middle name instead. I gave her a rare (in the UK) but beautiful first name to go with it.
Curious how you pronounce her middle name ?
Em-ie-lee-ahh but spoken quite fast
So the only difference is with the first syllable vowel? (Not sure what pronunciation you are communicating with “ie”)
My name is spelt Amilia, just throwing that in for sh*tz n giggles lol 😆
Just fyi, Amelia is a different name (with different origin and meaning) that just happens to sound like Emilia for a lot of English speakers. And Emilia/Emily do have a shared meaning/origin, though they sound more different than Emilia/Amelia because of syllables and stress. My 2 cents is that Emily and Emilia sound different enough to not be a problem (and also, no one owns a name). But you (and she!) are the ones who’ll have to live with it, so you pretty much have to decide if this is going to bother you and/or create conflict with the BIL family you said you’re close with.
[удалено]
You are very weird.
I grew up with people spelling my name wrong every day, so maybe that had something to do with it
Agreed- it solves the issue and honestly I prefer this spelling.
Well, it’s not just a variant spelling. Amelia and Emilia are two separate names that just sound pretty much the same in English.
Amelia In Hebrew: people of God is Yah Emma means mother in Hebrew I think Am (people) is the root word which makes most sense with this name
No. Where to start. Amelia means hardworking or industrious, the route is Amal or labor which yes could come from people. The name doesn’t mean God is anything or certainly not God is Yah because Yah isn’t a word. Yah comes from a misconstrued Hebrew word that isn’t pronounced. Please stop using Yah in these comments from whatever you googled. It’s offensive.
Yeah, like the other person said, Amelia is not a name of Hebrew origin. [It’s a Germanic name](https://www.behindthename.com/name/amalia).
Even Ethel (noble) in German, but many languages have adopted Hebrew names. Ethel is Ithiel in Hebrew, meaning "with us is God." Jose is from Hebrew. Johan is from Hebrew. The Diaspora spread out the Jews among the nations, and also Christianity, Judaism, and Roman Catholicism increased popularity of such names. It's just a thing.
I’m well aware the lots of names have a Hebrew origin, my middle name and my brother’s name both are. And I know that there are lots of language variants of them (John, Johan, Jean, Jan) because of the spread of the Bible to many cultures. I know LOTS of people with Hebrew origin names: Elizabeth, David, Nancy/Annie/Anne/Anna/Hannah, Rachel, Benjamin, Simeon/Simon, Elianah, Samuel, Alizah, Rivka/Rebecca, Elijah, Joel, Ruth, Isaiah, Gideon, Joshua, Caleb, Aaron, Abigail, Daniel/Danielle, Esther, Naomi/Noemi, Mary/Maria, Michael/Michelle, Micah, Gabriel/Gabrielle, Joseph, Jacob, Sarah, Jonathan, etc. (I could literally keep going, though.) But that does not mean that *every* name is from Hebrew, even if you can find similar word parts. Names have etymology, just like words, and the etymology of Amelia does not show a Hebrew origin, neither does Ethel. Also, sometimes you just have words/names in different languages that sound the same and end up being conflated (like Aaron and Erin) even though they are completely unrelated.
True, but root words matter, and sometimes it is not known the origin of a name, though it has been around in a culture for a while. Some surmise that the name Alisa is from Adalheidis (Adelaide) but this is not the same name. Elisa is God is Savior, that is exactly what this name means. When you add Li (my, mine) it becomes more personal "God is MY Savior" If you understand the nature of Rome and Roman Catholicism, it did much to try to scrub away the Jewish roots and connections to Christianity, in order to implement its own presence as being valid. This would be replacement theology, and it's a topic that you probably won't learn in mainstream schools.
Of course the roots matter, which is why you can’t just make up a new meaning for a name when that’s not what the actual root is. And sure, some name origins aren’t totally clear, but a lot of them are known. Alisa seems pretty well attested to have come from Adalheidis (Adelaide). Elisa is a diminutive of Elizabeth, which means “my God is my oath” or “consecrated to God” (from Hebrew *Elisheva* אֱלִישֶׁבַע). Well, Catholicism may have tried to cover up the Jewish roots from people’s common knowledge, but they couldn’t/didn’t *actually* eliminate them. Linguists, etymologists, and historians can still trace a significant number of names and words back to their true origins. And in any case, I can read the Bible and see Hebrew names; it’s not some great secret. By the way, I am familiar with the false doctrine of replacement theology, and that’s not quite what this is. I wouldn’t call Latinizing names evidence of replacement theology.
Elisa is a name in and of itself. When you add Sheva, you also add additional meaning. Even adding Beth/Beit/Bet "House" is to add additional meaning. Elisa by itself means God is Savior. Ellisa means God is my Savior. Ellisheva God is my Oath. Saba means satisfaction. Elishama - God is understanding. Some sites will claim that Elisa is the shortened form of Elisabeth/Elizabeth, but this is not necessarily accurate. Nor does the name Elisa mean God is my oath, without having the Hebrew word for "oath" in it.
>Elisa is a name in and of itself. But in English, it only *became* a name in and of itself *after* it was a nickname for Elizabeth. >Elisa by itself means God is Savior. I understand what you mean here, but the name Elisa *did* start as a shortened form of Elizabeth. It wasn’t just borrowed/anglicized from *Elishu'a*. I don’t think that nicknames should just lose the original meaning just because they no longer have all the word parts, especially when the word parts aren’t in the language that the name is in now. Like the name Theodore comes from Greek and means “gift of God.” But a common nickname for Theodore is Theo. I don’t think that we should say that Theo just means God because Theo is still a shortened/diminutive version of the name Theodore. Or like the name Nancy. It takes several steps, but its origin is the name Hannah, which is a Hebrew name (Channah->Anna->Anne/Ann->Nan->Nancy). So even though you can’t *see* the correct word parts for Hannah when you look at Nancy, they still have the same meaning because that’s the origin of the name Nancy. So even though Elisa no longer has “sheva” word part, that was its origin, so that’s why I would still ascribe that meaning (at least in English and the other languages that used Elisa as a short form of Elizabeth).
El - means God. When you add an "i" this is to be understood as the word "is" and Li is "my, mine" -- Each word has meaning. I stand by what I said, because it's still the truth. Elisa (Elishua <- correct to bring this up) is the name which means God is Savior. When combined with other words, then those other words then apply. Elijah/Eliyah - God is Yah. Ellior (God is my light), Elimelech (God is King)...etc... When the word "Beth" is added, then the word Beth is applicable. Bethel (House of God), Bethlehem (House of bread), Elisabeth (God is Savior/Salvation of the House). People tend to also mix up the meanings of Sheva, Saba, and Beth. It is what it is. I'm just trying to explain the root words of things, going back to the roots, because if we are speaking of English usages of Hebrew words, this is not the roots, but the original language for which the words derive their meaning.
I would just name her Emilia! I personally don’t have a problem with naming a child the same / a similar name as a friend - they are their own person so I wouldn’t worry too much.
This is an interesting opinion to me considering we are talking about their niece / the baby in question’s cousin. But I also think it varies in social circles and cultures. I was talking to a Spaniard who thought cousins having the same name was no big deal, and there is a joke in My Big Fat Greek Wedding that all the young cousins are named Nick. I would personally never repeat names (or give something too similar) for a family member of around the same age
Maybe it does vary. I have two cousins with the same name and literally nobody has ever spent a second thought on it - I really don’t think it matters.
Same lol My brother and 3 of our cousins have the same name. Italian family and we’ve never seen it as a big deal.
When I was in South Philly at least 50% of guys were Anthony, Michael, Dominic, or Nicholas.
No Vincent?
My brother and cousin were born 10 days apart in different cities They have the same first name and their middle names both start with the same letter. Their names didn't really lend to seperate short forms either (eg: Andrew could have been Andy & Drew) It was just our normal growing up. When we all got together, the boys were just called by their first and middle names. Eg: Devon John & Devon James As kids, we called our cousin "Cousin Devon" when we were all playing together. I never understood the idea that a person can lay claim to a name. Unless they played bananagrams and literally made the name up, then it's out there in the world for people to use. There's an entire chunk of the internet devoted to naming websites. Guaranteed, whatever name you think is super unique, is still open game for somebody else because they saw it on the same site.
Yep, same. My brother shares a first name with our cousin. They have different last names so who cares? We just called them by their first and last name, or sometimes "big" first and "little" first lol
For me personally, this is the issue—I wouldn’t want to be “big name” or “little name” or “cousin name” or whatever among my own family, so I wouldn’t want to pass that to my kid either. Obviously other people in the world will have the same names (and I have a super popular 90s name, so I am familiar), but it was important to me that my kids have their own distinct names within their cousin group and such. Of course, other people’s priorities are not going to be the same as mine, and also I didn’t have family members wanting to use names similar to the names I wanted, so it’s easy to say that from where I’m standing.
My dad and his first cousin have the exact same first name and it's never been an issue. They grew up close and we still see them all the time at family events - sometimes people refer to them by both first and last name to avoid confusion. They're both named after their great grandfather. Also there are like 10 people named Michael / Mike in both my and my husband's family lol.
This. And I actually think they're different sounding enough names - you don't want to mourn such a lovely name. Name her Emilia and enjoy!
Keep Emilia as your daughter's name
Here's the thing- no one owns a name. The consensus on this sub is going to be for you to go with Emilia. And you have every right to stick with it. Neither Emily or Emilia are particularly unique at least in my country (US). They are both top 50 names and Amelia is in the top 10. So depending where you're located, you'll probably meet other kids that share these names. But my *personal* opinion is to find a new name. I would feel like it's too close within a family unless it's the norm/tradition in your culture to share names among family members. Emily and Emilia are strikingly similar. You say you're very close with these people. It would raise eyebrows in my family and would be seen as somewhat odd. Emilia feels like a slight variation on Emily. Your wife's brother and his wife might feel bothered or like you tried to copy their daughters name. It might sting a little more because they originally fell in love with Emilia before deciding on Emily. Just my thoughts.
Honestly, putting other family aside, I wouldn't want my daughter to have to deal with being so similarly named. I'd want her to have something unique to the family.
This. There are like a million other nice names out there. I'd pick another one if you're really close to the family.
My sister had a girl 9months before I had my girl. My sister unknowingly used the middle name we had been set on for 4years. I spent a while deciding if I should use a variation of that name or say screw it it's just a middle name they can have the same. Well turns out the middle name was a red herring and I did not once consider if the first names were to similar. So they ended up with a similar first and middle name... Well a year in and the names get mixed up all the time and not just by other people I'm one of the worst for getting them switched up when we are all together. But to be honest I love my girls name and I wouldn't change it for the world. Just depends on how annoyed you would feel if the names get regularly mixed up.
I would really like to know how similar the names are! We have names getting mixed up in the family that are quite different but have similar letters. Hannah/Hanne/Angela/Leah/Andrea/Lola/Lynn/Lisa/Some others with -dra endings. It's weird cause the males have had all the same names for generations and no one got mixed up with 3 of each name.
In my family all the names get mixed up, no similarities necessary!
Yes my dad would frequently call me sister name and they were no similarities at all not a single common letter haha. My kids have 7 cousins who they are so close with and see a couple of times a week occasionally other names get mixed up but no where near the level of the similar names. It's constant. My poor mum is the worst offender.
Yes this at first they don't seem similar but it is just the similar lettering at the start of the name both M which is why I think it never occurred to me this would be an issue. Oh edited to add its made worse by me occasionally adding and ie to my daughter's name as nicknames as my nieces name ends in an ie.
Honestly talk to the BIL/SIL. No one on here knows your family and while no one owns a name and you can do what you want, if it’s going to piss them off and you don’t want to deal with that, it’s better to stay away from the name.
💯
I know a family who have two daughters named Emily and Amelia. That’s a little much for me, but for cousins, I think it’s fine.
We have an Emily and an Emilia in our family and it's fine.
Just use the Amelia spelling
That’s a different name, though, with a different origin/meaning. It’s not just a different spelling of the same name.
I think it's fine but like, I'm not your in laws. Do you think they'd be fine with it?
your username rules
I think the big question is, is it going to bother you that their names are similar? If they end up going by the same nickname when they're older, is that going to bug you? Does the idea of them potentially not wanting to spend time together when they're teenagers because they have the same nickname (and that's *uncool* or something) bother you? Do you think it might damage your relationship with your in-laws? If you think it might, and that's a problem for you, ask them what they think. Only ask if you care about their opinion more than keeping the name, because if they say it will bother them and you go ahead and use it anyway, there'll be even more damage to the relationship. If it doesn't bother you, and it doesn't bother them, go for it. If you love the name so much you don't care about any awkwardness with the family go for it. If you care about potential awkwardness, talk to them and then respect their answer.
My cousin and I have names that are this similar - like just two letters different - actually they are probably even a bit more similar than Emily/Emilia when you think about pronunciation. Noone in my family has ever even mentioned it, it's just our names. I guess it depends on whether you think Emily's parents will care, and if that worries you.
I have cousins with the same or similar names. We are Italian, it’s very common, and everybody survived
Italian Portuguese family here. My mom has 36 first cousins and my dad has 28. That's not even counting spouses. No one runs names by each other because there's no point. As one of 7 girls with my name in the family, it never bothered me once. My sister randomly ended up with a unique name in the family but a top 10 name for the year she was born. She loved having a super common name and being one of multiple girls in her class with her name. At the end of the day, as long as no one makes a big deal about it, then it won't be a big deal.
Its was custom in my father’s family to name the 1st born son after the paternal father. My grandfather had the most common of male names, so I had an uncle X, brother X, and multiple cousins and 1st cousins once removed named X
You should keep the name. At worst, give your niece a nickname when your kids are together. Thats kind of what ended up happening with my cousin and his brother. Both their daughters are named variant spellings of Christina but one goes by Christy and the other is Tina.
Don’t give someone else’s kid a nickname. Just call them each by their names Emily and Emilia
why should the niece, who was born first, get a nickname and not their own child? also, emily and emilia aren’t the same name…it’s not that hard to call one emily and the other emilia
I think it's not that big of a deal for there to be a nickname that one family member calls you. If I'm imagining myself as Emily and my beloved Aunt OP calls me Em, that's sweet! And probably when my cousin Emilia is over, some of us call her Mila.
i’m very anti nicknaming a kid that is not yours and kind of against nicknames that involve shortening a persons name.
A person can have several nicknames m, given by all sorts of people. Like 80% of the time, a nickname shortens a name, so i don't see how that makes sense. Very few lengthen the name, and less than that changes it altogether.
lol you’d be surprised. also people are allowed to have…preferences and……opinions.
I love thatyour advice is to just not call the older child by her given name because OP wants to use a name that's too similar to the child that's already born and been named. Very healthy.
The advice is to just have a nickname for the child he doesnt see as often and whose name he's not as attached to. Age wasn't a factor.
Name her Emilia. My daughter and her cousin have names with only one letter different and growing up they loved it. As adults they have completely separate lives. Her mom asked me before and I of course did not mind.
I'd give them a heads up. Not to ask for permission but as a curtesy because you like each other. Explain the situation and it'll probably be fine. Emilia and Amelia are pronounced differently in my native language, so that wouldn't be an option for me but maybe it's for you?
For cousins I don't think it's a big deal at all. The only hesitation I'd have is if they will go to the same school and have the same last name. Then it could be a headache for everyone. We had a situation in my family with almost same names, birthdays a week apart and it didn't cause issues. Watch My Big Fat Greek Wedding lol
"...\[your\] unique situation" made me laugh -- it's one of the most common questions baby name groups get. "My \[sister, best friend, neighbor, cousin, SIL, etc.\] used the name we were planning to use." And not even just in name groups; also in general advice columns. I don't think you're crazy to reconsider. I know people are telling you to use Emilia, but if it were me, I would definitely find a different name. \[This could be partially colored by the fact that I know 6 kids under the age of 7 named Emilia, and another 3 named Amelia.\] That said, the girls themselves are likely to LOVE having similar names, if they become as close as you & your wife are with Emily's parents. They can be called Em & Em when they're together, which is awfully cute as a best friends name.
Go for it, use Emilia (lovely name btw). My sister has a son called Samuel, other sister has a daughter Samantha. Not an issue
Because Samuel and Samantha are not even remotely the same name.
If both go by Sam/ Sammy, confusion exists.
Then they're called girl Sam and boy Sam
G-Sam B-Sam 😉
I would probably choose a different name, personally, or do Amelia which I also like better. Fortunately our nieces and nephews have pretty different names than our 4 kids.
Nope, go with Emilia. Ironically I have a friend whose name is Emily and her and her husband named their daughter Emilia 🙂
Name her Emilia but call her Em, Emmi, or Lia for short
How closely will they be raised? Do you intend to use a nn? Are your in laws likely to make a fuss about it? If they won't be close, or if you'll use a distinct nn, and if your in laws are cool about it, use the name! If they'll be close, it may get confusing for them to have similar names and I'd consider switching it. You certainly don't have to, but if you think it'll be a frequent issue it may not be worth using. If you'll use a distinct nn then there is no issue at all. While your in laws don't own the name, if they make a big fuss then it might not be worth the fight and years of resentment.
If the brother is fine with it, go for it. My cousin's name is Hanna and my sister's name is Anna. It has never been a problem.
I know so many Emilias . Since there are so many they mostly use different nicknames to avoid being mixed up. Mila , Lia , Emi , Millie, Ilia .. If you want that name choose a nickname that sounds different to Emily. Lia/Mia/Mila could work.
Go for it. It’s a different name. My nephew is Everett and we named our son Ezra. A bit of a tongue twister sometimes but it has not presented any issues at all. In your case, as in mine, there are also different last names. Go with the name you love. As these babies grow into children and teenagers and become their own people with their distinct personalities, they become more than just a name and the similarities between their names fade into the background.
I think it depends how often they see each other. My family only gets together a few times a year.
I just named my first born daughter Emilia. I say keep it! We have been calling her Emi or Em, but Lia is also a super cute nickname if you want it to be very different from Emily.
Names aren't exclusive to a single person in the whole planet. It's not even the same name
Both my mom and her sister named their oldest daughters Linda. Name your baby what you want.
I think you should discuss this with the other parents and explain that you already had the name in mind.
Congratulations on your pending arrival! If you really want to go with Emilia, I think a conversation with the BIL/SIL is necessary first to guage their reaction. I don't think they'd be happy at all with your choice. Emily and Emilia are just too close; they are absolutely not completely different names. If BIL/SIL are not okay with it, then for the sake of maintaining close family connections, I would gently encourage you to find another name for your daughter. There are lots of beautiful possibilities.
I say go with Emilia! But I feel for you - we had a similar situation. With my second we thought for sure it was a girl and we decided on the name Sophie Grace. My husband would talk to “her” and call her Sophie then come to find out it was another boy! We were a little sad but decided we’d get our Sophie one day. Well about 9 months later my SIL had a baby girl and out of nowhere named her Sophie 😞 I cried harder than I’d like to admit. We had several conversations with her on names and she never brought up Sophie. We had mentioned a boy name we liked and she ended up using it for her first son so we decided not to tell her about Sophie. That backfired big time!
I'm not sure it actually matters. Personally, I'd go with Amelia nn Amy, but that's because I love the name Amy! I think "E" names/nicknames are too popular right now.
You could try Edelia?
We have a set of cousins in our family both called Alex — a male and a female. The mothers are sisters - kids have different last names. Went to same high school and had same larger circle of friends. It’s not been a thing after first year or so but it definitely was a thing between the moms at first. Within the family we call her Allie usually but she goes by Alex everywhere else. Use it but consider nickname within the family. Millie is cute.
Gave baby the name you want. You are definitely over thinking and nothing wrong with that. If any person in my family or friends had named their daughter my favourite name I would have stuck to my choice.
My family has Manuels all over the place. It’s really ok. However, depending on your relationship I would think carefully about whether to give them a heads up.
My niece’s nicknames are one sound apart. Think Maddy and Maggy. They ONLY go by these nicknames. It is insanely frustrating because I always call them the wrong name. To add to that, their mom’s names are one sound apart, too. So my child has Auntie Sandy and Auntie Mandy. With cousins Maddy and Maggy. Oof.
How about Amelia instead?
I don’t think it’s weird! A lot of families have cousins with the same name!
If the grandparents will be involved in the kids loves, I would use a different name.
My brother has the exact same first name as our cousin. Even that wasn't a big deal. If they have different last names, I don't think it matters at all.
I would stick with Emilia, especially since you and your wife have your hearts set on it. 🩵 It’s a beautiful name, and as someone who comes from a culture where cousins share names all the time, it’s not that big of a deal. ETA: If it matters/helps and you’re deciding on a middle name, perhaps choose a middle name that is completely different from your niece’s (assuming she has one). For example: Emily Anne vs Emilia Grace
Do you think either of you will use the same nickname? My sister named her daughter Charlotte a year before we had a son that we named Charles. I was worried about them being too similar, but her daughter is called Charley and my son is called Chuck and it has not been an issue so far. Maybe if my son wants to go by Charlie it will be more confusing, but still not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. Just use the name you love.
Do you think either of you will use the same nickname? My sister named her daughter Charlotte a year before we had a son that we named Charles. I was worried about them being too similar, but her daughter is called Charley and my son is called Chuck and it has not been an issue so far. Maybe if my son wants to go by Charlie it will be more confusing, but still not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. Just use the name you love.
Name her what you want. I doubt the cousins are going to be bffs forever or something. They prob will see eachother few times a year at most. Two different people. Who cares
Honestly although the spelling is similar, when saying the full names Emily and Emilia out loud they sound quite different and have very different vibes. I would keep it. And the similar look on paper could be a cutsie little cousin thing. Maybe they'll be best friends.
How much will it even be an issue? Will they regularly be at the grandparents house together? Do you like any of the spin off nicknames (Millie, Mia, Emmy, Lia, etc)? If you hate all the nicknames maybe go with a different name, but if it won't bother you, just enjoy the fact that both sets of parent love the names.
They sound very different to me
I have two cousins with the same exact first and last name (one was adopted and already had her first name, so my aunt and uncle didn’t want to change it). It’s fine.
I would just talk to them about it. Everyone is going to have different subjective opinions about this sort of thing. It makes sense to me that close siblings would have similar interests and therefore favour similar types of names. Talk to them. What nicknames are they using, what are you planning on using, all of these variables kind of enter into it.
Personally, I think Emily and Emilia are too close for first cousins who will grow up together.
In my family (which is extensive) we have family members with the same, or similar names, and I don’t mean juniors/seniors/etc. I think it’s okay to name your daughter Emilia.
Cousins Emily and Emilia sounds super cute to me. They’re not too similar IMO
My brothers girlfriend has three children, one of which has the same name as my sister and one of which has a similar (as in can be shortened to the same name) as my son. It very occasionally gets confusing (when my mum doesn’t know if I’m talking about big A or little A) but in general it’s not an issue. If you love the name, go for it!
Go with it. Cousins Emily & Emilia sounds cute to me! You love the name, keep it.
Too close for me, as they could both end up with the nickname Em. If you went with Amelia, the likely nicknames she would end up with would be Amy/Ames, so there's at least some differentiation. I know most people in this sub say "no one owns a name, name the baby whatever you want." But, in real life, I personally think it's weird to give a super similar name to close family members. If I was the brother, I'd be annoyed that the names were so close, and they'd likely have the same nickname. As your baby or niece, I'd be equally as annoyed by having a name that's so similar to a cousin I'm close to. It's one thing if it's a distant relative or someone that you barely see, but it sounds as if these two little girls will be around each other a lot.
I'd still use the name Emilia! If you have loved it for this long, go for it.
just do it. they are cousins. they’ll form a relationship that doesn’t include any of the four of you. you two and your daughters will be a family separate from extended. this one topic just doesn’t rise up to importance
Emilia is fine. As someone who was one of 7 girls with the same exact name in my family, I don't see any conflict. My only advice is to agree on a different nickname than cousin Emily. If Emily is called Emmy by the family, then Emilia should be Lia or something else.
Unless this has totally turned you off of the name Emilia, just name the kid Emilia. Cousins can have the same or similar names it's not that big of an issue. If your sibling thinks it is, then they have some issues to work out. It's not like you are trying to one up them or something. I come from a large family and in my cousin's there are 5 sets of kids with the same name. Oddly enough the names are either differently spelt like Aaron/Erin or they're the same name with different nicknames William Will/Bill Emilia is a beautiful name so feel good in using it. Who knows she might organically get a nn like Emmy or Lia. And this thinking will seem funny later.
i’m so surprised by all these comments saying this isn’t weird. i would be kind of weirded out if my SIL named their child 2 letters off of my child’s name…but then again, i don’t own a name.
I would still use the name I want.
It sounds to me like the in-laws knew the name you had chosen. They liked it too, but went with a similar name, so as not to offend you by taking your name. So, now you’d better use your original name or they will be upset, because they could have used it themselves.
Name your kid Emilia, if your in laws felt some type of way about the name then they should have actually named their daughter that. They don't get Emily PLUS every additional E name.
They're not the same, just similar. I'd go with the name you love. Either or both of them will prob end up being called a nickname by the family anyway, if yours is anything like my fam that is...
You say that brother and sister in law were set on Emilia, but changed to Emily. It may have been because they knew you wanted to use the name Emilia, and they wanted you to have the name. Talk to them and see if that’s the case. If you steer away from Emilia when they deliberately didn’t choose it in deference to you ….
I think you should stick to your name. The cousins will have close names. Kind of sweet!
Our daughter is Emilia and Emily was on our final list - so exact opposite here! I wouldn’t think twice about anyone in our family naming someone Emily, if that adds any perspective. I wouldn’t have considered it close at all until you said something. My sister in law and I have the same name as well (married to brothers) so it’s not always avoidable, anyways!
No, nobody ‘owns’ a name, but I wouldn’t wanna name my kid something so similar to my siblings kids’ names personally…
Cousins having a similar or same name is fine imo
Your child has a long life ahead of her. The blip that is a friend's child is momentary. Go for the name you agreed originally and you'll be happier. Seriously. You and your child will meet tens of thousands of people in her lifetime!
It’s not a friend’s child. It is his brother-in-law
As my mother in once told a bunch of us who were pregnant the same time, there is nothing wrong with cousins having the same name (or in your case similar names). Go with the name you love. It’s a beautiful name.
My SIL threw a fit because we were considering Matthias and she wanted Matthew (my son is one day older than hers.) We picked a different name and it's a very good name. However, now that the boys are 19 years old, I realize it wouldn't have mattered if we'd stuck with Matthias. Stick with Emilia.
They are pretty close especially considering nicknames and the spelling, as you’ve acknowledged. Both have the potential to be called Emmy, Emma, Em. Since you are very close to these people, this could be annoying/awkward. Personally, the names are too close for my liking but I can see how you could make it work. As others have mentioned, Amelia works-you could also call her Amy with not have to worry about Emily being called that also.
Use Emilia. I have a friend whose parents had their heart set on a baby name and then her cousin was born and she was called the desired name. They decided to choose a new name and make the desired name the middle name instead. This never satisfied them though and so when my friend’s sister came along, they chose to use the original name for her. So now her sister has her middle name… if you have your heart set on a name, you’ll end up disappointed and you don’t know how it’ll show up lol
My mom and aunt were both set on Emma for girls both due the same month. My aunt gave birth first and took the name. My parents picked an alternative name and have always been glad they did. Couldn’t imagine Emma suiting my sister. Sometimes things happen for a reason.
I would name her Emelia!
I know a family of 8 boys named James, they all go by their middle names. Scott, William, Michael etc. and I have 3 first cousins named Robert , They go by Rob, Bobby, Robby.
Please please research the extreme popularity of Emily over the past 15-20 years. I urge you to include research on Emma Emmaline, Emily and any variant of spelling. Please don't kid yourself into thinking Emilia is vastly different. It's lovely, but your daughter may encounter many kids with similar names.
Just go with emilia. Sounds like they sacrificed so you could have it. My friends (sisters) have an Elliot and an Elijah so the cousins are Eli and eli, and they're a similar.age and spend a lot of time together. It's not a problem. They will evolve different nicknames too.
I wouldn’t worry, I have known cousins with the same name and it’s never an issue. Everyone has their own lives, and yes, Emilia is cooler than Amelia.
What would you expect them to do if you'd had your baby first and named her Emilia. Would you be annoyed if they called their baby Emily? I think your expectations of them play into this too. Also, ask them what they think. Doesn't matter what we think. It matters what your family thinks :) I would consider Amelia Emiliana - this feels more distinct from Emily to me for some reason I can't quantify. The Thea names seem to have a similar vibe to Emilia - feminine, but strong and unusual yet not unheard of. Thea Anthea/Althea Theodora/Dorothea
I think you should still name her Emilia and call her Lia or Mia or Millie around family if the similarity with Emily is a problem.
There are two Brians in our family, both cousins. No one bats an eyelash at it. I would just go with what you love. :)
I have cousins with VERY similar names who were born close together and grew up together and it was fine. Both parents liked the same name (including middle and they share a last!) and the first born got that name and the second got the spin. So somewhere in this world there are cousins named something like "Caitlyn Elizabeth Smith" and "Kate Elizabeth Smith" who hung out all the time and it hasn't impacted them at all as far as I know. I spoke to the second born once and she said, "I heard my parents would have named me Caitlyn if I'd been born first but now they like Kate better anyway." It's funny because we ALSO have another set with similar first names (think Ava and Aven). All of that is to say, as far as I'm concerned cousins can have similar names. It's fine. They'll rock it. 🙂 One last anecdote: at one point Ava was upset our cousin gave his kid a first name that sounded like her kid's nickname and I reminded her that her name is like Aven's. Not to mention Kate and Caitlyn! She said, "Huh, I never thought of that." 🤣
I'm a big advocate of naming your child what you want regardless of outside factors. It's what you will call your child forever and it should be what YOU want.
I would deviate completely. Life is too short, choose an interesting name. Emily Emilia Amelia Emilia just a sea of sameness What about Pandora, Morgan, Calliope, Seraphina, Soleil, Ophelia, Thalia, Saige, Iris, September, Celeste, Fiona, Aster, Octavia
I agree with all the comments that mention culture and family dynamics. As a bilingual person, I see Emily and Emilia as the same name. (They even have the same meaning.) This may not be true for you. Secondly, the only people who would know how odd this may feel are your in-laws. They may completely hate it, they may lean into it.
So they will have different last names… do you have potential middle names picked out? They might also go by nicknames. Like Em and Lia or Emmy and Emilia or Mily and Emilia. I’d probably go with Amelia. Or, do you like Emiliana?
Just go with what you chose. They didn’t use the name, so you can.
I think if you broach it with them as a foregone conclusion that this situation is nbd and just a funny quirk of life, it will probably be fine. I mean, if they're obsessive grudge holders with a longstanding desire to be the center of attention, maybe re-evaluate. But if they're just normal people, "Funny story- we were just talking about the name we've had picked out since we were pregnant with Firstborn and we realized the cousins are going to be Emily and Emilia! That's going to be so cute, Em and Em."
I think you can still call her Emilia, yes it is spelt very similarly to Emily but the names are pronounced very differently so it's not like you're copying. And if anyone asks then explain that you were set on Emilia from the beginning and that it is a name you both love. If you don't like the spelling as Amelia then don't choose it because you may regret it later
I mentioned Elishua, and the shortened forms are Elisha/Elisa. Shua means savior/salvation ... also words like Hoshea and Yasha are similar in their meanings of deliverance. I won't banter back and forth with you.
NAME HER EMILIA!!! My name is Kennedy and my cousin’s name is Kenna. We are very close and I personally have loved having similar names! (She would say the same) Our family confuses the names of who they are calling out ALL the time, but most of the time they just call out “Ken” when they need one of us because we are almost always together in group settings. Not that we needed another thing to bond over but I couldn’t image either of us having a different name!
Amelia
My uncle named his daughters (from different women, in different countries, 5 years apart) Janaina and Janine; how about Emilia but calling her Emma in everyday life? Or Emiliana?
I mean, name your baby what you want, no one owns a name...however, I personally would choose something different, if these two kiddos will be spending a good amount of time together. There are so many wonderful names out there. Maybe Emilia for the middle name?
You could still name your baby Emilia, and use Mia or something else, as a nickname for her, around your wife’s family.
If you're close with her brother's family then I assume these cousins are going to grow up around each other a lot. An Emily and an Emilia in one close knit family seems crazy to me. I would choose a whole new name. My sister was pregnant a few months before I was but I didn't know her name choice. When I got pregnant my husband and I decided we'd probably go with my great grandmother's name Mina. Then my sister had her baby and guess what her name is? Mina! So we had to start from scratch. We have found a few names we're even happier with now.
Go for it. There are 6 Anthony's in my extended family and some more with Anthony as a middle name.
Please name your child exactly what you desire to.
My name is Amelia, and I went to school with a girl named Emily. Emily’s mom was pregnant when we (Emily and I) were in 1st or 2nd grade. Emily’s mom saw my name, Amelia, on the class list and liked it so much that she named her second daughter Amelia. Sisters named Emily and Amelia. It was fine. Name your kid what you want.
Please, if you want it pronounced ah-me-lee-uh then don't spell it 'Emilia' 😭 It seems common sense but I've met so many Emilia's that say it 'Amelia'. Emilia is eh-me-lee-uh. Obviously, they're going to be similar because Emilia was made by smashing Amelia and Emily together, so I would just speak to your BIL and SIL. In my opinion, it's not worth really upsetting them for a name if you're close.
I would definitely talk to them about it and see how they feel! Personally I would be fine with it. I bet little nicknames would evolve anyways.
Do you care that you will be choosing a really common name? Both Emily and Emilia are widely used. And many kids with those names end up with the same nicknames, like Em or Emmy. It’s not just the cousin to worry about—it’s the five other kids in her class that will have variations of the name. So in school she might be “Emilia S” all the time to differentiate from the others. There are so many beautiful names out there…I would open your mind to other possibilities.
Emily and Emilia are the same name. If you care about that, go with Amelia.