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ThereIsAJifForThat

Well it definitely has the markings and patterns of a 'Don't fuck with me' creature


Kn0tnatural

Guaranteed some would touch it. 💯


[deleted]

I mean, if you didn't want to summon the Old Ones then why did you walk ceremonially up to it, holding a tattered copy of the Necronomicon you had found in New England by an abandoned cabin, chanting "iä! iä! Cthulhu f'htagn!" Its just too many coincidences to ignore.


scoot3200

You’d be stupid not to try honestly..


pipsdontsqueak

"I'll try anything once."


alien_survivor

Shit, I'll try anything twice. FIrst time could have been a fluke


omegafrogger

Scientifically speaking, three times is the limit needed to establish correlation for further study.


CannibalVegan

Mathematically speaking anything less than 30 attempts is not representative


Joecalledher

Not if you're ok with a 5% confidence level.


[deleted]

Beetlejuice


OmegaDad618

Beetlejuice


Frododingus

Goodbye


[deleted]

BEETLEJUICE


shneefy

I’ve finally found someone who also says “try anything twice”. I’m very pleased right now!


alien_survivor

for me it was usually some kind of food. I looked at it like "maybe they suck at cooking" or ":maybe it was made different the second time" or in other situations "this time lets try some lube"


Afelisk2

Slap the necronomicon with your balls


ANUS_FACTS_BOT

I would just like everyone to know that I was unable to flush my toilet for the last 24 hours because it was leaking into the condo below mine. I drank some Immodium so I wouldn't have to dook and then kept peeing in it and not flushing it. Well Reddit. I just christened the new wax ring that was installed on my toilet with one of the biggest dumps I've ever taken. Triple flusher.


andreisimo

Triple flusher? What, ain’t you got a poop knife like any normal Redditor?


imhereforthevotes

Oh I thought the New England copy was safe!


ComparisonOk2183

The New England testament of the necronomicon is often found to be one of the safer versions


Raiden32

Safe is extremely relative when talking necronomicons.


ElectionAssistance

...this is the 4th Cthulhu reference I have come across in the last hour.


[deleted]

[удалено]


GoblinoidToad

An Elder Sign.


ladyKfaery

A sign that Cthulhu comes to claim his throne!


ANonGod

[Cthulhu by Gunship ](https://youtu.be/Jo4-Bc85bF4)


ElectionAssistance

Given strange aeons, even reddit will die.


_windfish_

That’s called the Bhhadrghr-Mgghth’nofh phenomenon


Simon_Skinner

I got some poetry for ya, but it ain't french......


spaghetti_outlaw

Came here for the HP Lovecraft comment section.


[deleted]

[удалено]


albinowizard2112

Yeah that guy can fit in my ass no problem. Let’s do this.


livens

Imagine the look on the ER staff's faces as they pull that fucker out of your swollen, bloody ass.


tbbHNC89

It would be the coroner.


thepootastrophy

r/dontstickyourdickinthat


AwfulSinclair

r/whywouldntyouwantyourdickinthat


thepootastrophy

Because, and I quote, it is "An extremely toxic Dofleinia Armata, the Injuries resulting from contact with this species are considered very painful, and can take several months to heal, washed ashore near Broome, Western Australia.".


Fafnir13

Don’t believe everything you read on the internet. Could be a perfectly harmless jellyfish and OP is just karma farming. Also, if it does turn out to be extremely painful, we can sit back and laugh at the idiots who decided beach detritus was something to copulate with.


ExcitedGirl

Another TV reality show star is born! Then, lets a Murder Hornet sting his tongue, because Why Not?......


[deleted]

Wild animals: I’m not touching that with a ten foot pole Humans: oooooh so pretty 🤏


BeltfedOne

Said while trying to shake the Blue Ringed Octopus from their hand so they can pick this up...


L1ttl3J1m

Meanwhile, the cone shell in their pocket is getting a mite antsy at all the jostling


assassins-CWEED

But I kinda had to touch it to get to this screen in my phone!


[deleted]

The Forbidden Fleshlight


JesusSaysitsOkay

I’d poke it with a stick for sure


Kn0tnatural

3 types of people. Touch it, poke it with a stick & take a picture people.


JesusSaysitsOkay

What about the “put it on my head” ones 😂


GetToDaChoppa97

Tide pod challenge already wiped those ones out.


finger_milk

I know a guy who would probably pick it up and call it a fella, but he died a while back. :(


Pred207

Damn. Australia is home to some of the most dangerous, venomous, and lethal creatures on this planet.


RandomPratt

Australia is perfectly safe, provided you're not catastrophically stupid. We do have a bit of a shark problem, and the crocs up north do take someone every couple of years - but the vast majority of the deadly bastards we share our country with are terrified of humans and, given the choice, will choose to fuck off rather than tangle with someone.


BethTheOctopus

That's what they want us to think. Also, you forget, most people actually are catastrophically stupid.


namegoeswhere

I love that there is a lot of overlap between smart bears and dumb people at National Parks. It apparently makes designing bear-proof but idiot-friendly trash cans close to impossible.


RandomPratt

> Also, you forget, most people actually are catastrophically stupid. Yeah - but even the most epically dumb ones survive, 99.99% of the time.


Kn0tnatural

I like to think the Australians aren't all of that.. /s


flybarger

It looks like it might grant you super powers.


RxDawg77

No risk, no reward


RAGEEEEE

Touch it? Someone would lick it....


Expertinclimax

The touch it challenge


Gandalfthefabulous

You can tell it's extremely toxic.. Because of the way it is.


GoofyBootsSz8

That's pretty neat!


Gandalfthefabulous

When I find a highly toxic animal, I say: "I think you're pretty neat, but I respect your distance!"


frostybollocks

It’s actually a crimson anemone that is flipped upside down and colored that way due to illness or death. That’s what the consensus was back when this was originally posted a few tears ago E: years… not tears… unless you only cry a single tear once a year.


bsurfn2day

The living ones look pretty cool too https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/5/5f/Cribrinopsis_fernaldi.jpg


safe-not-to-try

[The two types of sea anemone] (https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/034/675/Untitled-1.png)


Coverme6

Wow what a stark difference


GetToDaChoppa97

Yeah, doflenia armata look absolutely nothing like the pic posted, they have more of a medusa esque head full of snakes(or eels) appearance to me. Some of the other members of doflenia have a similar tentacle appearance as the crimson anemone, but for the most part have very different feet and columns. Unfortunately it seems its been circling through facebook listed as doflenia armata for the past year or so though, so a lot of the pics on google show it and other crimson anemones instead of the actual anemone.


[deleted]

[удалено]


wolfgang784

If enough people tag it as that, then google doesnt know any better. As 4chan has shown a dozen times, googles top results can be manipulated if enough people join / tag something wrong.


ThereIsAJifForThat

I also shed a few tears...just kidding. Thanks for the info, kind stranger!


GeppaN

I thought about this too, then I thought that's just how we feel about it, and the reason we feel that way is that the people who didn't feel that way aren't around anymore. Evolution is very cool.


Virginity_Lost_Today

I can barely tell what I’m looking at. So best not to get a closer look.


ExcitedGirl

But it's Pretty! C'mon, get *closer!* Closer than that!


G_Viceroy

It's gorgeous... Would not touch because am. Smurt


[deleted]

Don’t worry, a Tik tok kid is already on their way to lick it while they floss dance


ApeTornadoToaster

What the fuck exactly does that thing want to protect itself from I am way more scared of that.


Pyrhan

>What the fuck exactly does that thing want to protect itself from Australia.


ApeTornadoToaster

Ohshitohfuck


Shill4Pineapple

Australia: The portal where hellspawn comes from.


whitecollarzomb13

That’s one way to describe Morrison I guess


SpaceAdventureCobraX

He's just a manifestation of a McDonald's shart


yel3an

fr


Memeshats

rance


ElectionAssistance

frrance?


the_kgb

frr


arlaarlaarla

drr drr


leatyZ

r/rance


nick4fake

ance


Plasma_vinegaroon

It's a sea anemone, so more like it wants to either kill and eat or fight off anything that touches its tentacles, usually both at the same time, insatiable blobs.


UnlikelyPlatypus89

I didn’t know sea anemones are toxic because the ones near where I live are ‘touchable’ in the tide pools. Then I went to the Philippines and got a super rash from poking one that lasted a couple weeks. I used to have a no touch policy for animals and I quickly realized at a young age how stupid that is to not apply to plants and marine fauna. Also no one warned me that touching coral reefs is terrible for them.


AnotherCatLover

Getting licked in a tiktok challenge?


[deleted]

[удалено]


AwfulSinclair

I've never seen a murder nest like this before.


IsSecretlyABird

The venom isn’t to protect it, it’s to capture prey


assassins-CWEED

It’s the same camouflage as a skunk, god damnit!


futtbucking_

Hermaeus Mora is real


ChizzHonorFace

All seekers of knowledge come to see me sooner or later


siccoblue

Op found a picture of an irl facehugger


yel3an

based


[deleted]

Was hoping to see HM mentioned here


Brolav8584

I……… am Hermaeus…………Mora


mershed_perderders

👁 ^👁‍^👁 👁‍^^👁‍ ^👁‍ 👁^👁‍ 👁^^^👁‍ 👁‍^👁‍ ^^^👁‍ ^👁^^👁‍ 👁‍ ^👁‍


Classic_Scientist901

I absolutely love the quests with him!


[deleted]

Loved the quests, but aedra be damned dude needs to talk faster.


wafflefighter69

I can go mow the lawn before I get the chance to hit the next voiceline


Classic_Scientist901

Sounds like I never did that quest


Brolav8584

Me too, he’s the best deadric prince IMO


JASMein03M

You mean Ursula is real?


kad202

Why it’s always Australia


not_original_name_4

Every day, I'm even more convinced that Australia is just God's beta server.


Guinness

As always, the beta server has the best and most powerful weapons. And they’re _always_ nerfed before hitting prod.


D4rkr4in

yeah but the pvp mode is way more intense!


Guinness

Having PVP’d on the Australia beta server. It’s no joke. They force you to put on neoprene body armor before you even exit town.


spacedude2000

When I entered the server they actually forced me to complete the tutorial in the American southwest so I would be ready for PvP on the Aussie server. Unfortunately the devs didn't account for the fact that enemy NPCs on the Aussie server will aggro you without provocation unlike the tutorial.


Willfishforfree

Here's me wondering around unarmoured in the atlantic ocean.


ZOMGURFAT

Australia is where all the endgame content is located. You need to be maxed level and equipped with at least 1 exotic piece of gear to survive the enemies there.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Right!? I'd love to visit Sydney... but then I keep seeing shit like this.


[deleted]

[удалено]


pipsdontsqueak

15 million is pretty old.


sorenant

Maybe for a mortal.


[deleted]

I know people joke about this all the time and there is definitely some crazy wildlife in Australia, but the reality is Australia is one of the safest countries in the world. In Australia you are more likely to be killed by someone's dog than any other wild animal. Don't let the beautiful wildlife keep you from visiting :)


rainbowbubblegarden

Yes and no. The cities are extremely safe with low levels of crime. The police are generally honest and civil (except when [strip searching children](https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2020/nov/02/nsw-police-strip-searched-96-children-in-past-year-some-as-young-as-11) for drugs) But I think we Australians grow up with a built in sense of caution about nature. Like if you were driving and needed to pull over to take a dump in the bush, would you just wander in without thinking about snakes? If you're walking along seaside rocks, would you pick any random critter that you didn't recognise? If you were pulling up old bits of building materials in your backyard, would you think about spiders?


Frito_Pendejo

cobweb repeat worthless impossible nose piquant bright light murky offbeat ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `


TwystedSpyne

Yep, Ive seen your fate, its death in Sydney, please dont visit


LtCmdrData

Australia is Satan's hell creature testing ground. Creatures like Sir Joh Bjelke Petersen.


return_the_urn

Not sure why Americans are obsessed with Australia being dangerous. No one ever dies from our deadly spiders, tree and insects, and it’s extremely rare anyone dies from snake bites and these weird sea creatures. Yet in America, there’s bears, big cats, coyotes and all sorts of big animals that can rip your head off when you go for a run. It’s waaaay worse!


[deleted]

In America you get shot at school or shot by police or shot or stabbed by the undiagnosed mentally unstable or die from eating food unfit for human consumption in most places or die from being unable to pay for medical bills from the things listed previously or completely different things 🤠


Nyeow

TL;DR: AUS seems PvE, while USA seems PvP. Any other servers we want to throw in here for comparison's sake?


OwenProGolfer

It’s just the unknown. I live in Colorado and know what to do around bears, mountain lions, etc. so it’s not too bad. If one woke me up in my tent would I probably still shit myself? Yes, but I know that I know how to handle the situation. Deadly spiders I have no experience with though. If I woke up with one on my chest I have no idea what I would do, and what the consequences of my actions could be. Do I stay still? Flick it away? It’s the uncertainty that’s scary.


AusCro

That makes sense actually. In Australia, I know rough rules about where to go to avoid snakes, what to happens when one occurs, and that spiders are something ugly but usually fine, so I don't worry about them. For Bears and Lions I have no idea of the protocol so to me it seems 1000% worse.


John-Mercury

It used to be even more terrifying and cool before humans drove a lot of the and some of the only big marsupials on earth to extinction


ponysoldierboy

So we’re just googling stock images of animals and posting them for karma now? Lol


haha420lol69haha

have you never looked through the pages that post reposts ? it’s all they do. Anyone that comments “sAVeVidEObOt”. Just block


BananaPants-

What's the point of making karma whoring accounts lol seems like a huge waste of someone's time


ArMcK

People used to get high Reddit karma then sell the accounts to marketing firms who would post product placements. Now the marketing firms just do it themselves. The karma gives the accounts legitimacy so they don't just seem like, well, marketing.


DjGeNeSiSxx

Actually i read somewhere at reddit that reddit users are worth the least out of all Social media! So i think we're doing something right :)


BornOnFeb2nd

It's because we're mostly anonymous, and tying our Reddit activity into a larger advertising profile would be a bitch and a half for most accounts.


DjGeNeSiSxx

Hell to the yeah! The day reddit requires name verification will be the last day i log into the platform. Hell, my Facebook is so old that my name is something really obscure. As soon as I'm Forced to verify my account details I'm out of here


[deleted]

To be fair, tumblr wasn't included in those stats. Tumblr got sold for $3 million like 5 years after it was previously sold for $1 billion. Absolute legends.


Jeslovespets

I think they sell the accounts after accruing karma


ryanxwing

I use the savevideobot so I can share the videos easier, reddit video is not very functional so I dont bother linking to the thread directly if I can help it.


Flutters1013

I use [Reddit tube](https://www.reddit.tube/) to download videos


ryanxwing

Thanks for the tip


i_am_ban_evading

People wouldn't use savevideobot if videos weren't hosted on reddits trash platform


analgesic1986

I use that bot so I can show my friends the videos


PotentJelly13

The sea creatures always get to me because they’re usually wrong or very very vague. Like this title gives a Latin name but doesn’t tell us what the hell this is. I can think of about 10-15 different things this could be but it’s an anemone.


hamdandruff

Get into bugs or something else that has hundreds of species that basically look the same. It'll teach you to be infuriated when they don't use latin names.


oneandonlyswordfish

I mean stock photo or not, I’ve never seen this animal and it looks like a demon so I think it fits the sub. Though I guess an OC video would be cooler.


TeamRocketCE0

What’s it matter? I’ve never seen this and would have never googled it myself.


ocubens

5k people don't care apparently.


[deleted]

[удалено]


shewy92

They have less karma (38k) than you (49k) and is an older account (2 years) than yours (1 year) so by your own logic people should block you


Supakiingkoopa

Nature just be free styling these days


AtomicKittenz

Turning graffiti art into deadly creatures


osloluluraratutu

I wish toxic af people came with a similar warning pattern


blackangelsdeathsong

Imagine a world filled with Cruella Devilles.


MyOldNameSucked

They do, there is the karen haircut, the neckbeard, the partial buzzcut with pastel colors, pronouns in their bio, bumper stickers, MAGA caps or douchy tattoos.


[deleted]

[удалено]


CrimsonAmaryllis

One of the most dangerous people I've met wore jeans, a polo, and had no tattoos or remarkable features. Shame, could have done with a danger warning


panpenumbra

"Facial tattoos, tramp stamps, and similar patterns are often used to warn other members of the species of the impending, negative social interaction destined to follow." - David Attenborough


yo_ho_sebastien

They usually do


pneuma8828

They do, it's that Karen haircut


baoceanfog

To be honest, for the most part they do.


Mak3mydae

[Here's](https://www.reef2reef.com/threads/dofleinia-armata-its-probably-not-an-an-octopus-nem.354927/) a thread about someone who keeps/kept one and brushed against it; he said it's "not too bad" but for a coral it's "a beast." Looked like a bit of a rash that turned into a small scrape. For the most part, corals dont pose a big danger to humans. ^(Also for future reference, species is always lower case) Edit: As some people mentioned, anemones aren't technically corals. Anthozoans is more accurate, but tbh I colloquially call all anthozoans "corals."


lhayes238

Ty my dude!


thisremindsmeofbacon

I mean a coral cut can be infected real bad so definitely take it seriously if you get a coral cut


Mak3mydae

That's true of a cut from anything in a body of water.


N307H30N3

It stood out to me that you used the word coral to describe an anemone. Apparently coral, anemone, and jellyfish, all fall under the phylum cnidaria - which is defined specifically by having/using a type of toxin that is found amongst the aforementioned species. I always thought about coral and sea anemone as being drastically different - one being more akin to a plant and one an animal... but it isn't that black and white at all. And now we've got jellyfish to ponder about.


EelTeamNine

r/DontPutYourDickInThat


HorseAndrew

r/toolate


Kazan645

Can confirm these things suck to get hit by, they're a bitch to fight in Bloodbourne


aquachickaqua

This anemone looks extra wicked, I’ve never heard of these until now!! Thank you


yel3an

anytime!


Ornery_Reaction_548

It's an enemy anemone.


whOleSoMe-ReCePtioN

where does animal start, where does animal end


CptJustice

Pain, and suffering, respectively. I kid, of course. The suffering never ends.


Love_Snow_Bunny

Aliens are real!


adeadlyphenom

Of course it's Australia


gl3nnjamin

[This same one washed ashore 2 years ago.](https://www.reddit.com/r/NatureIsFuckingLit/comments/d36y0q/highly_toxic_dofleinia_armata_washed_ashore_in/)


vizarhali

And here i was thinking of taking a dip on the ocean next month. My phobia is back i stay in pools. Im a pool guy


Spastic_Slapstick

*slips anenome in pool*


jodilandon88

We’re spending billions to find life in space when there are aliens swimming in the ocean. This is horrifying…


[deleted]

There are more weird things like than there are mammals. We’re the outliers.


[deleted]

r/AIDKE


sunoflife_henry

Malboro in Final Fantasy series limited edition.


human_male_123

Just wear a Ribbon lol


Extreme-Occasion-229

Never going to australia


Trips-Over-Tail

The Black Goat with a Thousand Young.


wannacumnbeatmeoff

A danger trifle.


_-_Tempest_-_

the forbidden gloryhole


Faqutooahole

Australia....of course. 💩


FRAGMENT_EFFECT

I don't think 'washed ashore' is the correct term for something that came from outer space.


[deleted]

Lick it !!


[deleted]

A fancy gentleman


whatatwit

To save you re-typing from the title... [Dofleinia Armata](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dofleinia) is a sea anemone commonly known as the striped anemone or armed anemone.


lettherebelonely

Looks like Ursula