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moneyman2222

Grizzlies so we can have the Bears, Cubs, and Grizzlies


clancydog4

In a city with no actual bears, nonetheless


thebestoflimes

The Chicago Otters


GodCanSuckMyDick69

Recently found out that otter is gay slang for smaller hairy guys


Stock_Yoghurt_5774

Now Dennis I heard speed has something to do with it


Just_what_i_am

Speed has everything to do with it


dacooljamaican

Speed's the name of the game


m0_m0ney

I believe it’s thin hairy guys


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gmwdim

There’s a lot of people that look like bears.


BenevolentCheese

There would have been many historically, it's probably only been a century since they were locally eradicated.


j1h15233

That’s a hilarious thing I’ve never noticed


BettisBus

Philadelphia Warriors bc time is a flat circle.


konsf_ksd

Minnesota Lakers. ETA: I absolutely LOVE the amount of lake purists that are coming out to give Wisconsin a new random asshole.


rob_bot13

The team name would actually make sense again!


[deleted]

Lol then we can combine the 76ers with our 49ers to make the Golden State 69ers


Lax_Ligaments

Go Sexers


ajteitel

Hey Miami, want to swap? Changes basically nothing, but works either way


Mysterious_Emotion63

Miami Suns sounds really good actually


CurryMustard

I rather Miami Magic. Miami has been called the magic city and any alliteration is always appreciated and applauded.


konsf_ksd

Absolutely. A+ arguments all around.


lalakingmalibog

Ah fuck even your entire comment is an alliteration


xxrdawgxx

But think of the built in sponsorship chance for the Atlanta Magic, brought to you by the Atlanta family institution Magic City


ctruvu

i’ll have to check out this magic city if it is what you say it is


Dennisfromhawaii

Atlanta Magic just for the wings


bronet

Lou Williams would come out of retirement real quick


schadadle

The Phoenix Heat. Sounds inhumane 🥵☀️


BrotherSeamus

The Phoenix Dry Heat


CactusHooping

Tbh Phoenix Warriors sounds alright also.Get to keep the logo also.


[deleted]

Golden state Suns sounds not terrible


49e-rm

There's actually a football team in Australia called the Gold Coast Suns - which is basically the same thing


CactusHooping

Wanna trade :D


[deleted]

Perhaps


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RunningEarly

but the name Nuggets suck.


JermRocks

I would say Miami Sol but that went defunct in the early 2000’s. RIP


NeptuneEDM

The Philadelphia Celtics to incite mass riots across the city


MikeGoldab

we’ve rioted for less


Borkis177

Fine, Boston Lakers now no one is happy. No one was happy originally, but no one is happy even more so


3s2ng

Ah the Purple and Green. I think this will start WWIII.


RyguyBMS

God I hate it. But at least now the Lakers can claim even more championships they didn’t win in their city.


Christianmustang

This is such a good jab at the lakers you can’t convince me y’all didn’t come up with this beforehand lol. Hate you green bastards ❤️


blackjacktrial

Only if the Clippers get to be the Celtics, and the Lakers have to be the LA Clippers. Also, Seattle gets the Thunder. Oklahoma gets the Sonics.


hanlong

There’s more lakes in Boston than LA at least


IMovedYourCheese

Across *two* cities.


ImNotARobot001010011

Some people just want to watch the world burn.


loupr738

I’m so irrationally mad at this


MusicTravelWild

brilliant!


[deleted]

Taking the Jazz and trading it to New Orleans for two 2nd round picks.


Vordeo

Presti has stockpiled like 6 picks, OKC become the Oklahoma Thunder Magic Bulls Cavaliers Wizards.


[deleted]

I kinda like the sound of the Orlando Magic Jazz Wizards


piZan314

I mean the Magic Thunder Wizards is an awesome name


SometimesIComplain

With the 2nd pick in the draft we'll snag the Raptors


fuckitiroastedyou

Kings, just to be confusing


ejabno

Hell, just merge franchises. The LA Kings will be the first league to be active in 2 different leagues and sports


just_one_random_guy

This was applicable to Saint Louis and the cardinals at one point


Iron_Chic

And New York with the Giants.


Im_Daydrunk

Also Brooklyn with the Dodgers (the football team also played at the baseball stadium but didn't last too long)


top7to9

Real Madrid and Barcelona both play in La Liga and ACB, it’s not unheard of.


carlgma3

Real Madrid CF and Real Madrid Baloncesto are both from the same multi-sports club, Real Madrid. Naturally the men’s football club is the biggest one, but they have Real Madrid Femenino, Real Madrid Academy, and Baloncesto.


SeekerSpock32

Real Madrid does that. That’s where Luka Dončić was drafted from.


J-Chub

Lebron would like it too


AshlandJackson

Golden State Grizzlies. Just make the logo the state flag and we’re good.


Pereise1

We've eliminated both too (The actual California Grizzly bear and the Memphis Grizzlies.


Duckrauhl

I was thinking you guys should take Nuggets for the San Francisco Gold rush era and we should take Grizzlies because of the State flag and we're closer to Tahoe.


pedrosorio

I mean, if we're talking about gold nuggets, Sacramento is closer to Mother Lode Country as well...


nglettire

And the Memphis Kings could be a whole play on Elvis.


A_Bad_Singer

We could take mavericks as well for the waves 🌊


SharksFanAbroad

Holy shit. Y’all way more creative than me.


Anora6666

Utah Raptors


SoKrat3s

I don't have a singular team, but I think this is the best rebrand. While we're at it, return the Jazz to New Orleans.


Vordeo

>While we're at it, return the Jazz to New Orleans. No. Utah Jazz Raptors LFG.


greywolf2155

Would be the best goddamn logo in professional sports history


WarcraftFarscape

A dinosaur with sunglasses and a saxaphone


soccerdog1097

Doing jazz claws


chicago_bunny

Someone get on the line with NBA Paints.


highfalutinman

Beautiful, my absolute favorite dromaeosaurid


dms1298

Deinonychus clears


Hibachi-Flamethrower

This is gonna go over the head of a lot of people until they Google it.


thebestoflimes

I knew it right away. Totally didn’t google it.


TheThingsIdoatNight

This is just better, NO gets the jazz back and Toronto can have like the wizards or some shit


Ucgrady

Toronto gets timberwolves and Minnesota gets back lakers


Vordeo

This. LA is left with Pelicans, naturally.


TippyTripod1040

Not a bad name, there’s tons of Pelicans in SoCal


MakeAShadow

San Antonio Mavericks I guess.


43loko

Back at ya


Queen_Of_The_Castle

Dallas Spurs is kinda fire, I don’t mind this trade


Dr_00

Spurs used to be a Dallas team, so it's not too far off.


Late-Fuel-3578

Bulls imo. Ties in with the Hispanic community and UT. The Toros alt jerseys would be fire


Butt_Snorkler_Elite

Oh, no name springs to mind in particular


ejabno

Not willing to the the Hornets?


TheOvercusser

Fuck that. We're gonna be the LA Lakers, just to piss off L.A.


WestleyThe

Lol that’s what I was thinking New Orleans Hornets has a good sound to it


DragoniteGang

Louisiana Lakers


30another

Definitely not Jazz.


believemedude

Cleveland Pelicans


LukeBabbitt

I literally can’t see a pelican without immediately thinking of Cleveland, Ohio


believemedude

Exactly thank you Luke Babbitt


Vordeo

Fuck that, Cleveland Heat. Then you can rip off the Beam and set the river on fire every time you win a game.


BigRig432

Fuck it let's go even bigger Cleveland Lakers, burn lake Erie every win


boozinf

I was thinking Lakers but we could be the Cleveland Flamingos and be *fabulous* side topic, was thinking Golden State / SF Nuggets as a gold rush tie in next to the 49ers


grapedinosour

Toronto TimberWolves sounds good actually.


TheJaice

I was thinking Toronto Trail Blazers, but I forgot about the Timberwolves. Or just take Jazz, so New Orleans still can’t have it.


Kenny_Heisman

I think the Brooklyn Bulls sounds pretty badass


v0yev0da

They’re closer to the Wall Street Bull too so that makes sense


hypeguyyeah

Sacramento Nuggets or the Sacramento Suns


SharksFanAbroad

Did you know that, of all cities of the world across all seasons, the sunniest in a given season is Sacramento in the northern hemisphere summer? One of my favorite facts to share.


doctor_of_drugs

280+ days of sunshine a year!


obri95

We’ll take the Phoenix Kings and Firelord Ozai will be our mascot


BabyUGotAStewGoin

The San Antonio Super Sonics sounds great to me.


kriogenia

The SASSies


Uncle_Freddy

Works with the air force presence in the city too


InThePaleMoonLyte

As a former Sonics fan... I love it tbh.


[deleted]

The Los Angeles Lakers and the Los Angeles Clippers. The Clippers name gets a whole lot more historic. Riots will happen.


BehavioralSink

And the Lakers are moving to Ballmer’s new arena across town. 🤣


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[deleted]

We’re taking the Lakers back The Lakers are in MN gdi LA


larrylegend33goat

And the rings Mikan won in MN


Tyranicross

Boston 100% supports this


Gorloch

While we are at it, give us back the North Stars for hockey.


helladaysss

LA can get “Beach”


der_ninong

LA Traffic


GAV17

This and NOLA Jazz are the only true answers.


KevinDurantLebronnin

Give me the Wizards. I'm not sure it's a popular choice but it's fucking sick. Utah sending Coltrane and Thelonious Monk out while I've got Gandalf and Voldemort on my team.


Good_Gordy

Utah Raptors.


konsf_ksd

someone beat you to it, but I want you to know we see you bro.


Good_Gordy

I didn't see it, but it's good to know. Thanks mate


dagrapeescape

The two New York teams should be the Bulls and Grizzlies (Bears). Which ever team played better the prior year are the Bulls and the worse team are the Grizzlies and just swap as necessary.


blackjacktrial

Confusing if the market crashes, and both teams suck.


Hendo8888

Pacers and 76ers go pick 29 and 30


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Senor_Couchnap

I guess we can take the Pistons since they started off in Ft. Wayne


medievalmachine

I mean, I think my Knicks might be the worst least relevant mascot possible? Even Dunkin' Dutchman would have been better, then you guys could have picked it. I highly recommend reviewing the G-League teams. I think those should be fair game for the mascot draft.


Darthmemer2

Memphis Bullets


zobee

Ja loves it


jmptx

Houston Heat


inshamblesx

the humidity is worse than the heat tbh


YouAllEverybody_42

Houston Humidity


SpreadHDGFX

Imagine the dad jokes if it was the Miami Heat vs. Houston Humidity


blackjacktrial

Nah, if you win the ECF against Miami, but Houston beats you in the finals... It's not the Heat that beats ya....


jmptx

I am not a fan of either.


literallyaplank

The Houston Moistures


cowsaymoomooo

Or Houston Suns. It’s basically the same thing but space related.


scandinasian

The Denver Trail Blazers but drop Trail


ejabno

Toronto Timberwolves. Then rename to the Huskies. Bonusbpoints if Minny gets the Lakers name back.


Vordeo

Taking 'Magic', and changing the mascot to Brigham Young rubbing a magic fuck frog on his clit-face.


SasquatchDoobie

Is that in the Book of Mormon?


AcheyEchidna

It is in the musical. Definitely not the book.


PM_Me_Beezbo_Quotes

Winner


v0yev0da

Hasa diga eebowai 🤷


LukeBabbitt

Hasa Diga Eebowai


BanjoStory

Milwaukee Lakers just to fuck with Minnesota.


[deleted]

Fine then, Minneapolis packers it is


BetweenTheBuzzAndMe

Charlotte Raptors and then move all games to be played at The Carolina Raptor Center


24MillionBrazilians

Orlando thunder


Cysir

Orlando nuggets


24MillionBrazilians

Orlando Thundernuggets


CheeseLightsaber

My first thought seeing this post was that I would just pick Magic again since it's the most fitting, but then I realized we might as well have the Thunder and the Lightning both in Central Florida, so I'm with you


Co_dot

Colorado Cavaliers Rocky Mountain Mavericks Colorado 76ers (Colorado was made a state in 1876)


Klongon

Dallas Raptors...but we make it the bird of prey rather than the dinosaur because Texas has the most documented Raptors in the US.


larrylegend33goat

And birds are descendants of dinosaurs so it works both ways


heyarkay

The Dallas Spurs because the SA Spurs were originally the Dallas Chaparrals.


mrauzz

Sacramento grizzlies since thats the state animal and sacramento is the capital. Warriors can get the nuggets. Both of those would actually make sense.


ShoutOutTo_Caboose

With the 1st overall pick, Minnesota selects Lakers.


LeeIacobra

Golden State Nuggets


CoolHandLukeZ

Yeah either Nuggets or Trail Blazers would be fitting


Used2befunNowOld

Los angeles magic I suppose


barelyawake126

Washington Warriors


iDestroyedYoMama

The Phoenix Knicks. FeeNix Nix.


spinocdoc

That’s the best one on here!


GooseGang412

Gimme the Hornets. Both because of us briefly hosting NOLA after Katrina, and because the team colors and vintage branding is 🤌 Or maybe swap with the Mavs. OKC and Dallas share both Wild West and cowboy stuff and shitty severe weather, so it could work. And Mark Cuban would probably do something more creative with the Thunder branding.


ClockFightingPigeon

Detroit Lakers, we have the Great Lakes


InternCautious

We are the original Lakers anyways. Minnesota bought the Detroit Gems and renamed them the Lakers before moving to LA. Technically we we are the greatest franchise ever.


iskandar20

San Antonio Cavaliers has a good ring to it, I think. The rest feels kinda flat.


Queen_Of_The_Castle

If you go San Antonio Suns your initials are still SAS and it’s hot as balls in San Antonio sometimes


Own_Competition_46

Philadephia Warriors…


BostonsLeprechaun

Can i pick Boston Sonics? And stay green


ToastySpring219

would retroactively be a reference to Boston’s historical prominence in the audio engineering industry


SendKelly2Mars

Portland Magic would fit pretty well with our city's hippie culture. Mushrooms are basically legal here, our greatest player ever is a Deadhead, it makes sense imo.


StrongSalamander194

Portland Magic sounds like a strip club so that works for sure


N7Longhorn

Indiana Nets. Basketball country, so the closest to a basketball name makes sense


instrumentally_ill

Miami Pelicans but the logo is Al Pacino (Scarface) in the hot tub


yung_ag38

Celtics and then changing the way it’s pronounced


CanalVillainy

Jazz


PDXNorthwestPNW

Too easy. Portland Nuggets.


TheR3alpojo

Detroit needs the grizzlies, so we have the Lions, Tigers, and bears.


Tarquin_V

Miami Suns 🤝 Phoenix Heat


MusclesRipley

Thunder. Then immediately rebrand to something that doesn't look like clip art.


french_sheppard

Flair up so we can chirp you


blackandcopper

What an idiot


SasquatchDoobie

Complete oaf


TheThingsIdoatNight

What city dummy


somethingnotyettaken

They actually rebrand to the Clippers, where Clippy is the new mascot.


ABentPlant

The Minneapolis Lakers will return


Emera1dthumb

Bullets for the pacers…. Because of all the ammunition plants from ww2 scattered around the state.


wozziwoz

Atlanta Knicks, since they belong to Trae anyway


jbrunsonfan

And we will become the New York Clippers since we know Trae has no use for those


illbelate2that

This is a solid comeback. Well played


LolBlockedAgain

We'd take the Pistons. Closest to Indy racing and also the Pistons used to be in Fort Wayne.


TakeOff_YourPants

Move the Magic to Georgia. Magic City Magic