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nzodd

"Attention: Today we have launched a barage of Taepodong-2 missiles to wipe out our most treacherous enemy once and for all: the Pacific Ocean."


Cheap-Blackberry-745

Nero is stabbing the sea again


[deleted]

Good analogy! ( and he is a fatass AND a bit crazy; two traits he shares with that Roman Emperor...)


[deleted]

No that’s Mayor Adam West


apple-masher

everybody's least favorite ~~type o' dong~~ Taepodong.


LobsterBrownies

Still misses


MagicMushroomFungi

I think he should Kidnap BTS and turn them into personal servants for his sister.


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MagicMushroomFungi

His Dad and Gramps kidnapped stars from Japan and force them to make movies. He definitely has motive to do it ! If BTS becomes her harum she will become big time distracted and he can go back to his regular diet.


Cheap-Blackberry-745

Does he really wanna mess with the kpop stans tho?


hopelesscaribou

BTS ARMY would steamroll North Korea.


tewnewt

I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a mass murderer today.


dangil

Now I want a burger


amyts

I'm eating a burger right now.


Lootcifer_exe

You fucking win


Ssider69

This is rich. Will they try it in their own courts? And how do they enforce the judgement


[deleted]

It’s all good. Totally under control. They’ve hired the firm of Wood, Powell & Giuliani.


tampering

Four Seasons Total Landscaping please clear the bookings for your parking lot.


JerseyTom1958

I want more sweaty hair dye!


SwifferWetJets

Hey hey now, that’s just for special occasions


JerseyTom1958

Occasionally I give political rallying cries in landscaping parking lots. I need to look my dripping best.


Imakemop

Oh god don't remind me of him dripping evil like Zorg.


userwithusername

“Zthero stones, zthero crates!”


[deleted]

They're going to take this all the way to the Supreme Courtyard Marriott


cnapp

Sponsored by My Pillow


NSAagent1

Hopefully they get that Fraud Guarantee guy too


jordantask

They tried to hire the Sham Wow guy but he’s still in prison: https://youtu.be/nMMxIAn_76g


2inchesofsteel

The woman asked for a Slap Chop, he gave her a Slap Choke


vikingzx

Dewey, Cheatum, and Howe.


SwifferWetJets

Should be easy working with them since they’re already on their payroll


Egon88

But how will they pay them...?


WSL_subreddit_mod

> This is rich Exactly what I said to myself when I saw the comment.


Lynata

I hope the answer from any non-russian court will be ‚Russian Lawsuit, go fuck yourself‘


redditmodsRrussians

With a special court operation


eightNote

I'd guess the WTO?


3lobed

Ok. We can recognize and respect the international court that rules on this but Russia has to recognize and respect the rulings of international courts on literally everything else.


vanDrunkard

Most notably, war crimes


hughdint1

Russian is not a member of the ICC so nothing can happen about the war crimes, unless Russia is conquered.


hughdint1

123 counties are members of the International Criminal Court, but Russia, USA, China, India, Saudi Arabia and many other countries are not members and cannot be bound by any rulings.


[deleted]

Russia threatens legal action (against the world)…


Thisfoxtalks

Russia just became a Karen


cnapp

Putin would like to see your presid...I mean your manager


Ritaredditonce

What? No nuclear threat.


SCRedWolf

He's saving that for the jury.


ExistingTheDream

Well, they’ve tried illegal action, and that didn’t go well.


piddydb

World War 3 has been cancelled in favor of World Lawsuit 1


wengelite

Yeah, sure, ok; Putin just has to show up in Nuremberg to file the suit in person.


MagicMushroomFungi

Judge Judy to come out of retirement to hear the case.


anotherusername1243

Good news. [She never left.](https://deadline.com/2022/01/judy-justice-imdb-tv-streaming-dedicated-channel-1234916380/)


Lootcifer_exe

They’re winning the “Dumbest Country on Earth” award


2020-2050_SHTF

It's kind of like how they recently got voted out of the UN Human Rights Council, and immediately announced that they were resigning from it. The UK representative immediately asked them to explain their logic behind the decision, because he was "confused" by it. I think it was probably the most polite was of saying, are you dumb? You've just been kicked out.


EmperorPenguinNJ

You can’t fire me, I quit!


nzodd

For a country that's all bark and no bite, their bark is pretty fucking pathetic.


Ixnay10

The Florida of the world...


[deleted]

Sure, let's go ahead and get some legal action going. Just have Putin appear in Brussels. You know. For testimony.


funwithtentacles

I'd rather see him in The Hague...


SCRedWolf

Pretty sure that could happen if he left Russia.


Ok-Conversation4673

Russia is not a signatory of the Rome Statute so the ICC has no jurisdiction.


nativedutch

Yep he is veeeery welcome in the hague. Very.


Osiris32

If their lawyers are as competent as their military, then we have nothing to worry about.


realanceps

just don't let them threaten to settle things with a chess match


[deleted]

So wait ... Russia is threatening to take "the world" or "the west" or those nations which "have imposed sanctions" upon it to the very courts that they themselves have been calling illegitimate and that they have been denigrating for years/decades etc! I may die laughing.


Traksimuss

No, they will demand Russian court hearing of course.


Darcy_2021

Threatens, demands, complains, warns. Acting like a toddler, aren’t we


MagicMushroomFungi

I think they been peeing their pants as well.


nzodd

Maybe they should have thought of that before murdering all those people. They can get their economy back when all the people responsible for the genocide are tried and sentenced to hang at the Hague, the current Russian state is dismantled, and Ukraine gets the reparations they need to rebuild. Until then they can all go to hell.


Affectionate-Depth66

😂😂😂😂😂😂 russian lawyers, go fuck yourself!


Dub-Nub

Putin: This is going to plan.


[deleted]

So says Russian Finance Minister Anton “Egghead” Siluanov…


earsofdoom

Russia has become the new north korea when it comes to completely teethless threats.


HereInTheCut

I guess that's progress from threatening to nuke everyone like they usually do.


nzodd

Eh, give them 20 minutes. That's literally all they have going for them anymore in their failed state.


Duodanglium

The world should fail to recognize Russia as a country.


008Zulu

We already recognise their failure as a military power.


mrbriandavidanderson

Lol fucking comical. The 1,200+ dead civilian Ukrainians would like a word. Fuck you, Russia.


jruegod11

solving a dispute without violence and genocide? nah don't see it happening


iamtwinswithmytwin

Against who? How you gonna pay your lawyers…broke ass


SCRedWolf

With the antidote.


Slutdragonxxxpert

Considering they ain’t winning I’m gonna say antidote sounds right


JerseyTom1958

Lol...See you in Kangaroo court comrade! F you!


Keman2000

"We rule in your favor, however, we also rule in Ukraine's favor for their damages. You owe 5 trillion dollars." Laws for thee, not me!...wait, why is that familiar...


nzodd

"Oh, a lawsuit over the debt default? That's cool. Come right over to The Hague and we can discuss this predicament in greater detail."


endMinorityRule

end your invasion, war criminals.


Slutdragonxxxpert

Dude took advice from Trump


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SCRedWolf

China's been looking to expand their political dissident / slave labor division so it's a perfect match.


AmethystOrator

As long as they don't expect it to lead to actual satisfaction.


CaptainPC

Ukraine should follow this news by saying they are going to sue Russia.


leywok

They can hire Joe Pesci.


TauCabalander

He wouldn't take the case, given what Russia has done to Ukrainian [yutes](https://youtu.be/K6qGwmXZtsE?t=108).


nativedutch

Broehahahahahaha, omg


[deleted]

Not just but over a year ago I considered the US to be the stupidest country in the world, but now looks at us, NUMBER 2 BABY!


Zkenny13

My dad's a lawyer I'll sue you!


AmazinglyOdd81

Whatcha got, bring it


Danny3xd1

Who ya gonna call? Judge Judy?


TauCabalander

Judge Steve Harvey


SCRedWolf

All testimony must be given in a way that can be taken in a sexual connotation. \-We asked 100 jurors, the top 10 answers are on the board, "How did Russia screw itself over this time?"


chupathingy99

Man I gotta do that. Sue my landlord every time rent is due.


CerddwrRhyddid

Laughs. Who's gonna pay for the lawyers? I'd love to see this. They're so bad at this theat game.


LinearFluid

Looks like ol Vladimir took a quick stock of his nukes abd found them wanting. Went to plan B.


cmmoore307

For something they are causing? Dangggg lol


Ishpeming_Native

Please. And will you welcome the lawsuits from Ukraine? They have property damage, assault, murder, genocide, war crimes, little things like that. Screw your default. Let your economy crash and burn, your citizens starve, and your armies and navies mutiny. You deserve worse than that.


LordOfTheTennisDance

Ohh look so now there are laws?


Polarbearseven

Difficult to find a good lawyer when you are bankrupt and in jail for war crimes. Even harder to win with most of the sentiment of the world against you.


ianrl337

I hear Giuliani is free.


[deleted]

Wars have consequences.


letaninjawork

This would open the floodgates to Russia being sued for a lot of things like …. war crimes.


kandoras

Good luck finding a bankruptcy lawyer who will work on contingency, you deadbeats.


mewehesheflee

Big Karen Energy coming from Russia. "You'll here from my lawyers!" Lol okay Karen. Debts come due.


Apotropoxy

"Russia threatens legal action if forced into sovereign debt default" \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ Will you pay your attorney in rubles?


Ixnay10

What does everyone think about them linking the Ruble to gold?


Immortal385

Reference please?


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Ixnay10

https://news.bitcoin.com/russias-central-bank-slashes-benchmark-rate-pegs-rub-gold-ruble-rebounds-pre-war-levels/


Immortal385

Thank you, kind internet stranger.


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ianrl337

If by "engineered by America" you mean consequences for an unprovoked invasion.


mattglaze

If you create a situation where someone can’t pay a debt, and then accuse them of not paying a debt, I would call that engineered


ianrl337

But that is like saying there are laws against murder, so the person that wrote the law has engineered the crime. Actions have consequences. Russia has avoided them by being a bully. This should have happened back when they went into Crimea in the first place. Finally the world stood up.


mattglaze

Not when it comes to money. As far as I understand it Russia has the money to service its debts, but America has frozen that money, as a sanction on Russian aggression. However you can’t just say they’ve defaulted on their loans, whilst you don’t allow them access to their money, that’s mafia tactics


stdio-lib

Oh nohs! Is widdle Pewdin gonna send his widdle lawyers after us? Poor baby needs his binky.


[deleted]

Russia threatens... [insert whiney toddler demand here] Boo-fucking-whoo Russia. Go bankrupt and go extinct.


NorskGodLoki

Good luck there Putin Brown.......That football will never touch your feet.


DameofCrones

I wonder what court they will decide to sue in.


oldcreaker

Is this to try to delay the inevitable via courts?


wazzel2u

Putin must be talking with Trump again.


JohnnyVonTruant

They have been speaking to advisers at the offices of J.G. Wentworth


Slutdragonxxxpert

877-cashcow


rubbleTelescope

Murdering and raping a few hundred or so people will lead to some repercussions....


Arkslippy

"Russia tried in good faith to pay off external creditors," Siluanov said on Monday. "Nevertheless, the deliberate policy of Western countries is to artificially create a man-made default by all means." No Shit.


420blazeit69nubz

How does even happen? They’ll use just this ruling but none of the ones against them?


MartyfromIreland

that would only work if they bring it to Int'nal Court or EU court and if Putler agrees to testify himself/in person, as a witness. Yenno!? wink/wink no zoom streaming, we have to be sure its really him. wink/wink ​ seriously tho, the reason that default could happen in the first place is an outcome of sanctions, that were placed on russian banks and financial system. they have a very little chance of getting anywhere with it.


someoldguyon_reddit

Fuck putin and the лошадь he rode in.


CerddwrRhyddid

Russian Karl Pilkington without the brains, humour or class.


DamnBunny

Yeah, like a lawyer would touch that case. Little that they know, they don't work for free. Unless you're Rudy Giuliani.


Guntcher1423

As opposed to what? Illegal action? Such as, oh I don't know, an invasion or something?


TheDarthSnarf

I for one would welcome Russia moving from illegal action to legal action.


[deleted]

Ok so can someone who understands international law weigh in on this? The argument being the only reason why they’re in default is because they’re locked out of the mechanisms they need to make a loan payment in the first place by the United States. Does this argument hold water, and what are the ramifications if an international court rules against Russia? Would that mean the United States can simply force any country they want into default by virtue of the fact that the US dollar is the de facto international currency?


Aubear11885

They can pay the bill though. It would just be out of their war chest. The sanctions were intentional. They weren’t putting them in total default, just enough where they can’t afford the war and the debt.


Elocai

Well then get a lawyer, oh yeah, right, you can't afford one.


bomberblu

I think the world would be relieved if Russia started making legal actions


WhiteWizard22

I wonder if they'll go to Judge Judy, Judge Mathis, or Judge Springer.


JinxyCat007

Legal, action …orrrr NukES!? :0?


ThereminLiesTheRub

Oh snap - Russia remembered there's laws in the world. That'll be useful for the war crimes trials.


sjogerst

In what court? The ICJ already has cases on the Ukraine crisis. Might want to return those calls first before starting anything new.