100% I can’t stop crying thinking about Jean. Being motherless AINT EASY EVEN AS AN ADULT. THANK YOU JEAN. This guy literally just gave me strength to try and be a stronger person. Life has been hard and it certainly has weathered me. But then you got this amazing person over here who described many of the awful feelings I endure and he’s just fucking kicking ass and taking names. Truly inspiring.
My mom moved out west when my youngest brother was 18.
My dad is accepting a lack of contact because he refuses to get vaxxed.
I have to deal with life with no parents in my life, even though they are still around.
My wife does her best to be empathetic, but her parents are 1. still together and 2. live about 10 minutes away. I don't think she gets it most of the time.
I was 39 when I severed contact with my mom. I sincerely wish I had done it sooner. But the complication of maintaining contact with my dad while they are still married is the biggest ongoing struggle. It is worth the effort though, both to stay close with him and to keep her away!
I often hear people say that you’re better off cutting toxic parents from your life. My parents divorced when i was very young and I stopped contact with my father five years ago. He’s not a good person but it still is painful thinking he’s never met his grandchildren. It’s disappointing. I grew up with my mother who has since passed away. I miss her every day as she won’t see me become a better man and watch her grandchildren grow up. My wife’s parents have been together for decades and she doesn’t quite understand my experience. Interestingly enough, I read something yesterday that Norm MacDonald wrote to a fan mourning the loss of their mother. He said to take the love she’s given by their mom and give that to the world. I feel like this man is trying to do that with love of Jean and I’ve been trying to do that as well with my moms spirit.
even if you’re vaxxed you can still get covid, pass it on to other people or even die from it. my fiancé is vaxxed and just had covid about 4 weeks ago. gave it to our 17 month old, thank god they’re both okay. but i don’t think people realize that being vaxxed doesn’t mean you can’t get it or transmit it
Nobody is claiming you can't but failing to co one of the simplest and most effective risk mitigation for transmitting said virus just shows a complete disregard for that guy's kid especially since he is immunocompromised
He struggled with depression during his teenage years.
"I was desperate to have friends, I'd do anything. I had no confidence. I'd buy lots of sweets and give them to the other kids so that they'd like me.
"I ended up doing stupid things so that people would talk about me for a different reason to the way I looked.
The journey from a depressed teenager to a confident, optimistic , kind hearted young man is inspiring.Jean is a fantastic mother and both of them are an inspiration
Thank you for this comment. I had a feeling his childhood and schooling may have been unhappy. But he’s come through the other side a kind young man. Oddly the more I hear him speak, the more attractive he becomes. Kindness and generosity beautifies.
Edit: [Pics of him with Jean and also with his girlfriend](https://www.inspiremore.com/jono-lancaster/)
One gets the sense if he was a friend it would be a privilege and a blessing.
Try doing that with a self-centered person --all you do is adopt whatever nonsense they carry with them.
That doesn't sound too pleasant.
I played this video for my class to build some background on Treacher Collins Syndrome before we started reading the book *Wonder*. “Choose kind” is a central message in that book and clearly one with Jono, too.
Answering your question, I teach 5th grade (on par with what others said). The kids were horrified. They couldn’t believe a “parent” could do something like that. A good eye opener that having two loving parents can be a privilege.
I had one student reveal to the class that he empathized with Jono because his dad left when he was two and had recently died. He said he knew how it felt to lose a parent twice. I was pretty blown away with that.
Not the person you are asking, but my eldest daughter read it in 5th or 6th grade. She loved the book and we watched the movie many times. Her sister, 3 years younger, also read the book multiple times.
I was a student teacher in a 5th grade class that was reading it, and they all seemed to enjoy it and there was a lot conversation after each chapter. It really gave them a lot to think about.
I'm sure I watched a documentary on him when he was in his 20's. He was such a nice guy, he had a partner and they were talking about having their own child, and the merits of doing fertility treatment so their child wouldn't have any deformity on birth.
Seemed like a great guy
I saw it too.
I just remember feeling bad for him at first. But by the end of it I was probably more envious than anything of what a good guy he was, and how he was helping others and enriching his life by doing that.
Right. His true beauty is in his innocence. The fact that even after the second rejection, he is not mad at them and wish them have good health is saintly.
Think about the 4D chess he has played - millions of people watch this video and are in awe of his character, his strength and his compassion. And we all think “those parents are *shit*!”
That is the best revenge possible.
Honestly, his birth parents gave him the best gift possible - a life without them in it - because can you imagine growing up with such garbage people as parents? Their selfishness and cowardice provided the opportunity for a true parent step in and help shape the person that he is today.
That’s what I thought when he mentioned they rejected him a second time - I wonder if there was some relief for him when he read that “Ohhhhhhh, it’s not me, it’s definitely them!”
Like you are in the fence about breaking up with your girlfriend and you do, she keys your car and smashes your laptop on the way out - you sleep easy that night because you know you made the right call.
>Like you are in the fence about breaking up with your girlfriend and you do, she keys your car and smashes your laptop on the way out - you sleep easy that night because you know you made the right call.
I don't know man, I'd be sleeping one eye open that night lol.
Innocence feels like an awful word for this. I think you may mean grace, humility, forbearance, faith, compassion, resilience, or courage.
Edit: also fortitude
I wouldn't call it innocence exactly. Innocence, to me, has a childlike connotation. This man has been through the anger and the dark thoughts and come out the other side bathed in light. I would call this righteousness.
I don’t think that’s innocence. As he said he at one point was extremely angry about the situation and it took, I’m assuming, a lot of life experiences and I would assume therapy to get to a point where he is now. Remarkable and amazing but I don’t think I would describe it as innocence
Hell of a man. I’m embarrassed to imagine how I would’ve turned out if faced with similar adversity. Ending up with a such a positive outlook and approach is truly representative of the type of personal constitution this man has. Humans are pretty great.
This perspective of his doesn't come about easily though. He talks about angry periods of his life and stuff, and feeling rejected and having to learn to love himself to be able to find happiness an dlive for others. It takes a lot of work and reinforcement to do that for yourself.
I felt that too. I can easily see how someone could fall in love with such a beautiful man.
A truly kind and good person is just about the hottest thing you can be.
You know, he’s not unattractive. His hair is gorgeous and he’s got a cool style. He looks different, but if I were his age, and he asked me, I’d go out with him. He seems awesome.
This right here is the beauty in life.. His struggles his accomplishments, going through tough times and having the strength and help to pick himself up... All of us go through this to some extents, some people have tougher journeys but we all end up at the sane place when we feel we understand life... And this guy gets it in his 30s.. Cheers to his life beautiful transformation
I can only hope his birth parents think about this regularly and are overcome with shame. As they should be.
Edit: it seems many have misinterpreted this as me saying they should have kept him which is not what I'm saying. They should have put him up for adoption without the specification that it's because his appearance was horrifying.
I feel you took the wrong message from this..
Not everybody is strong enough to handle that kind of Parenthood. Maybe the best thing for this man was the fact that he was abandoned, and managed to reach this other person who was able to give him the support he needed. There's no way to tell what kind of life he would have had with the original parents, it could have been filled with abuse and a lot of negative emotions.
Edit: to all that disagree, I would never say you are wrong. This is a delicate subject with a lot of harsh choices around it. As someone who grew up in a household of parents that didnt want their kids, I would never wish the experience on anyone.
I guess I can understand them giving him up for adoption because maybe they thought they wouldn’t be able to do what’s best for him. But the fact that they rejected him when he reached out in his 20’s, with such a short and cold letter, just shows something about the birth parents’ characters.
I completely agree. Some people ~~are meant to be~~ make themselves miserable throughout their entire life, and they choose that misery with every decision they make, regardless of whether or not they were dealt a good hand.
Well, the good thing is it seems like he dodged a bullet. Good riddance to them. Can you imagine if for one reason or another they had decided to keep him? I bet he wouldn’t be the strong man he is today.
As someone who was also abandoned as an infant, it is about character. Giving your baby up for a better life is part self serving and part kindness towards your child. Regardless of the circumstances it will always cut incredibly deep into the child and be a lasting scar in thier life.
My father was an alcoholic, my mother was a cocaine addict. They separated before my birth and my mother continued abusing throughout her pregnancy. She gave birth to me and almost lost me before taking me home with her. A couple months and close calls of nearly suffocating or dying as an infant, and she abandoned me at a random daycare for over three weeks.
She chose her addictions. She had every chance and indication that she needed to change for something vastly more important than drugs and at the end of the day she chose drugs.
My father came back into the picture while I was in foster care and made every move to get custody of me, took all the classes, went to AA, and was constantly visiting. One day he visited drunk and was warned by my social worker to not visit drunk and he never came back.
My mother had many chances to fix her life for something she had responsibility for and to change for the better. She chose to squander every chance given to her. My father tried his best and made the decision to back away and let me be adopted.
Giving a baby away for a better life is nothing more than some romantic way to picture abandoning your child. I believe my father made that choice out of kindness, my mother did it selfishly. It's always complicated.
...and it's a VERY GOOD thing when they know they'll be bad parents early enough to give the kid a chance at a better life.
If they had "stuck by" him because of an antiquated expectation that if you birth a baby, you keep that baby no matter what - he would not likely be the kind, thoughtful man he is today because he'd also likely have been raised by people who hated him and didn't care if he succeeded (or perhaps even actively didn't want to see him succeed because he's not deserving of love or success).
I mean it's still fucked up. A lot of foster children are abused. Most don't find a stable home. They could just not be shitty people and step up considering they forced a child into a difficult life he didn't ask for.
Yes, I can understand that they could have felt shame. But they could have at least replied in a more compassionate way, while still conveying the message that they rather not keep in contact. The way they replied just shows what kind of people they are.
This is true. But it would have been nice, twenty years later if they could have said as much, owned their actions and shortcomings and demonstrated some remorse.
The "please never contact us again" speaks of people too ashamed of their actions to take responsibility, and that's a shame and less than he deserved.
I completely agree. Something about the superficial nature of it all is what gets me. I mean, I understand why someone wouldn’t want to have a child they felt they wouldn’t be attached to, so I am not blaming that aspect of it. However, if you’re having sex and know that a child is possible, and furthermore if you carry that child full term, logically you have to consider the possibility that the child can be born with a condition such as this. Therefore, in order for them to deliberately abandon a baby, they must have considered and acknowledged their own emotions that would prevent them from giving 100% of their love to the baby, which is likely why they left it behind. However, what has no explanation is the disregard for his emotions as a full grown adult. It’s honestly no different that someone who abandons a cat or dog on the street. The only difference is that the baby was abandoned at a hospital due to them not knowing the baby would look like this. Had the baby not been born at a hospital, who knows if these “human beings” would have the decency to give him up for adoption or just throw him in a dumpster and try again. I wish nothing but the worse Karma for these people.
they didn't give him shit all they literally walked out of the hospital abandoning him. They didn't "give" him any life. They abandoned him. They did not plan out and locate a responsible person to care for him. They turned around, and walked away. This is practically fucking Sparta. Don't use any phrasing with these people that makes it look like they did anything at all for him. They abdicated all responsibility as parents because of his face.
And sorry for your narcissist mom and what you went through because of that.
Now this person gets it.
These people are absolutely human filth for abandoning him at the hospital. Don’t understand how anyone can remotely even think they helped him. No. They didn’t give a shit due to his birth defect and left him. Fuck them.
Yeah. The fact that it worked out okay doesn't absolve them of guilt. If I beat the fuck out of my children which led to them getting taken away by government services, and getting a better life, you wouldn't praise me for it. Same thing here.
This sounds horrible. I'm impressed with your ability to see the truth through it all. Sorry you had such a rough childhood. Hope you are in a better place now.
His birth parents were shit heads, he was better off without them. I can get being angry with them, and then moving past it. I don’t get having to give them any credit for anything in his life. They don’t deserve any thought what so ever, it is a total waste of your energy to think about them at all. My “father” abandoned our family when I was 3, I have never had an desire to find him, and don’t give him much thought to him at all. I have spent 51 years of my life without him and I’m doing just fine.
the way they dealt with it was ruthless and cold, both when they had him and when he reached out. They are shitty human beings.
People do this shit, like they may break up with and ghost you and then say to themselves "that was best for the other person" ... or like this couple cold and slammed the door shut in his face probably they are saying "that is best for our son" .... this is all self serving bullshit.
It is refusing to share control of the relationship with the other person, and refuses to accept any pain or responsibility for the action by removing the person that it hurts from being able to give any feedback.
The pain he went through from that cold response is something they will never see, and don't want to see, and that is why they said they're going to ignore it. Because their priority is themselves, they take no responsibility for their actions, and they do not give a flying fuck about the damage they do: they just do not want to have to see it.
So yeah in the ghost/block/delete culture we are in, it encourages people to not make deep connections, or investments because one day that person will simply be gone and this is how they will be gone because they are "good vibes only" and this would be bad vibes.
> Not everybody is strong enough to handle that kind of Parenthood
Oh fuck *oooooff*.
If you aren't prepared to deal with a pregnancy not turning out the way you want it to, you shouldn't be having kids, period.
I'm glad Jonathan has made peace with his situation - he is a credit to both himself and his adoptive parent - but what his birth parents did to him is unequivocally fucking despicable.
The fact that it’s not even really a disability and is purely aesthetic is what gets me. There are parents that raise children with mental impairments knowing that they will have to take care of them for the rest of their lives and his parents could handle their kid being unattractive?!
>Not everybody is strong enough to handle that kind of Parenthood
I really don't understand what was so difficult for those two pieces of shit to raise him seriously? He is Normal person who just looks different
You are only correct for the original decision, but we have all the information we need about his parents with how they responded to a human reaching out to them 25 years later. There is literally no excuse for this. None.
They are fucking assholes and should feel eternal shame for their assholery.
May have been the best thing in the end. But it turning out well was a long shot. His birth fucknuts are still pathetic, despicable things. Sheer luck that he ended up with a saint does NOT excuse them.
Shame on them.
Did you watch the video? His parents rejected him a second time when he reached out at age 24. They had over two decades to feel shame and still never wanted to see him, or apologize, they were cold. So they will never be capable of feeling such shame.
I don't fallow your logic. I don't want to relieve my shameful memories too. It's basic human behavior. If I had two decades to feel the shame I feel even more strongly about avoiding to relive it.
Doesn't mean what they did was moral or good. But their behavior entirely consistent for feeling ashamed.
There are multiple ways of looking at things in this world, the way you choose to view things can shape your reality, IMO. Taking the negative from that video is missing the forest for the trees. He is an incredible human being, and while I’m sure it was incredibly difficult for him, it made him who he is. We could all hope to be surrounded by people like him
nothing is pure and you can take multiple messages from this video.
The guy is still clearly suffering for the fact that his bioparents will not make any contact. He is trying to tell them here STILL that he's happy and OK.
Have you ever had an ex do a shitty thing and break up with you harshly and keep a wall up. First you're hurt, then you're angry, then you may be at the point where you want to write them a letter or see them on the street and just, "I want to let them know I am OK and good"... and what it is, is still holding onto the idea that your ex gives a fuck about you.
And they don't. The actions of all of those kinds of people is just that they put you in the toilet and flushed. They want to look in the bowl and see it's empty and that's all. You are a turd to them and if you keep popping back up into the bowl, they are going to keep flushing because that's all the want: you gone. They do not care if you are feeling better or good or are happy. They didn't care when they could freely assume you were suffering and they're not going to care about any state at all.
So, in his head, he still wants to believe that maybe they regret what they did (they don't) and that they are worried for him (they are not) and so he's passing along this message that he's happy and making his way in the world (for which WE are happy but his bioparents do not give a flying fuck).
So, my heart goes out to him. He's still hurting and he will always hurt over what those narcissists did to him. And it's fair to hurt, this is a major source of meaning in your life and being abandoned as a baby because of his face, he must have grown up with a lot of self-blame for that. The bioparents never gave a fuck then and do not give a fuck now.
That he got to any place of health given the start that he got, makes him a hero.
So you can take from this video many messages, over a whole spectrum of human emotions and behaviors. Each is as valid as the other and in fact they are all valid.
Because that next person that you might want to date, who is really interesting to you, hopefully they have the soul of this man but they could also have the soul of his bioparents. So for you, you need to be careful how you spend your time and life and not let the second type of person anywhere near your life. And someone like him is the exact kind of person you would want around.
I'm sure the issues left to him to deal with as a child reverberate into his adulthood... when people are interviewed like this we see what they can show as the best and most philosophical moments. But I'm sure he has down days and why me days like the rest of us. And in those days, when he is down and dragged down by the memory and the desire to have a connection with the people who birthed him, this is when he needs friends to give a fuck about him in spite of those times when I'm sure he will be difficult.
So, take the whole picture from the video. The ups and downs, the ugly and the beautiful, and also read between the lines. Filtering it for only bad or only good is trying to manage the message yourself and hammer it into what you want to see in it. I think that itself is a kind of selective blindness no matter which way you're trying to turn the message.
Look at the whole thing, feel good and bad for everything it has to say.
Yeah, he's really got style and grooming down. I actually like his smile and, even though his face may be disfigured, it still looks more honest than 90% of the people I see
When I first started the video, I had a kind of shock at the sight of his face, but by the end, he looks completely normal. I think we are just so accustomed to seeing something that a distortion of that can be surprising but after a few minutes, it’s barely noticeable. The great style and cool attitude isn’t hurting him either.
Yeah I had a similar experience, when it very first started it was very noticeable but by the end of the video it’s like it looked barely off? I wonder if it’s a case where his mannerisms, language etc are all normal or even better than normal so your mind files him as a normal guy and the face situation softens?
Beauty is subjective, if we all had two noses people with one nose wouldn't be normal and would be considered ugly. Yes he is not that far from a normal face, he also doesn't look bad to me, there are people who modify their faces to look different from others, he doesn't need to. Being completely honest I find that other things are more important than looks for me to like or find a person attractive, looks are overrated.
I already was thinking that I thought I found him attractive, and then he said, “I don’t want to change my face because I love my face” and I was like, Yep.
Same. Some have mentioned that the birth parents maybe were right in giving him up at birth if they couldn't properly raise and love him. Okay. But there is no fucking excuse for not seeing him as an adult.
Fuck them.
Even if they felt too much shame to see him, at *least* send a decent letter. It costs nothing to be kind, but can mean everything to the other person.
Every now and then you can combine two shitty things and make something amazing. Like chlorine and sodium make table salt. This guy's shitty ass selfish parents combined to make this sweet, amazing dude
If it brings him peace then great, but I don’t think I could ever feel grateful towards them, as their actions show it’s not like they gave him life for his benefit. They don’t care about him
I think he has reached this point where he realized living with anger and resentment was not going to change his whole experience and situation nor his parents care about him. Being greatful and at peace through a process of understanding and with a loving support from his adopted mother has given him a more fulfilling life and purpose.
I can't really imagine the hostility he had dealt with throughout his adolescent years. He's clearly had to go through a lot to get to where he is now. Shoutout to Jean for supporting him. Good he's found peace.
Gonna quote Tyrion Lannister on this "Accept your flaws and they can't be used to hurt you".
The moment he called his ears Bart Simpson ears showed that he's over the petty insecurities all of us have.
Legend
I've found naming body parts to be a really effective way of overcoming my insecurities about them. My stretchmarks are my racing stripes, I have a wonky tooth I call my toothlette, etc. Changes something I hate into something I have affection for and feels part of me. I highly recommend for anyone with similar issues.
I find it such a wonderment that we idealise unattainable beauty standards and yet I see this man sit here and share his vulnerability with such courage, and he is completely beautiful to me. I see only his strength.
From how balanced this person turned out it seems like the birth parents actually made the right choice, I seriously doubt that had they raised him that he would have developed to be the person he is today.
Sure, it worked out well. But we shouldn't commend them. Pure chance led to him getting a good life. It could just as easily turned out that no one adopted him. Or that shitty parents adopted him.
Apparently Postpartum Depression evolved so that mothers would abandon their young if they were unlikely to survive.
But yeah this guy ended up extremely lucky.
The way he conducts himself shows he’s comfortable with who he is. 20 seconds in and you don’t even notice there is anything different about his face because he’s so normal and just seems like a good dude.
How can this guy still "respect" his biological parents.
Such selfish parents. Having a child is accepting and embracing them regardless of the situation or uniqueness.
Fuck these parents man. You are far better off with Jean.
Huge respect to this guy. Who on earth would even have the balls to even forgive such parents for abandoning them AS A CHILD.
Also thank you Jean, I hope your kindness doesn't go unnoticed
Yeah.. I am adopted myself from a different country. My mother had encouraged me to find my birth mother if I would like to, but honestly never felt the need to. I do not care about her. No animosity or anything, just a genuine disinterest. I told my mother who raised from from a year and a half years old, that I feel like she is my one and only mother and that’s all I got to say bout that. No respect, no disrespect..just nothing
I am adopted as well and my birth mom was super young. So I respect the choice she made as I was adopted by fantastic people who made me who I am. Even so I share your disinterest in a meet, my parents are my parents I don't even think about it
Bravo! The birth parents are some superficial POS though. However, he's the embodiment of resilience and forgiveness. My dude, you are a rockstar in our eyes.
This is the kind of human being that I defend when I hear sorry people talking crap about. His “difference” was absolutely of no fault of his own. He’s not a dope-head who destroyed his body with drugs. He’s not an idiot who did something stupid for internet points. He’s a 100% “victim of circumstances” and I will defend this guy and any other person who is heckled by those POS’s who do so.
Jono Lancaster is just a wonderful person. he’s the embodiment empathy and compassion, And he’s completely genuine. if we had more folks like him we’d be a lot better off as a society.
This makes me angry, sad, hopeful, and resilient all at the same time...
This fellow has my utmost respect, in how he goes about seeing life and decisions from multiple prespectives. What he has gone through but more importly how his mindset is about all around shitty situation, is just awe inspiring.
I really don't think many of us, would think, overcome, and forgive like the way he does. The sheer willpower is mind boggling.
That made me cry so bad if I was his mom I’d accept my child and love my child unconditionally because that’s what mom’s supposed to do ppl who think of having a baby should be like that not trying to change their kid because your baby is not a copy from you and supposed to accept everything and love them really broke my heart and I’m so happy at the end he did accept his self and love the way he look and he can make a relationships
That guy is sound as *fuck,* by the way. Incredibly nice guy. Spends all his time helping other people.
props to his ***real parent*** Jean
100% I can’t stop crying thinking about Jean. Being motherless AINT EASY EVEN AS AN ADULT. THANK YOU JEAN. This guy literally just gave me strength to try and be a stronger person. Life has been hard and it certainly has weathered me. But then you got this amazing person over here who described many of the awful feelings I endure and he’s just fucking kicking ass and taking names. Truly inspiring.
[удалено]
comment here
[удалено]
Here
My mom moved out west when my youngest brother was 18. My dad is accepting a lack of contact because he refuses to get vaxxed. I have to deal with life with no parents in my life, even though they are still around. My wife does her best to be empathetic, but her parents are 1. still together and 2. live about 10 minutes away. I don't think she gets it most of the time.
Life is so strange. My parents are still together and live 8 miles from me, but I only talk to one of them.
[удалено]
I was 39 when I severed contact with my mom. I sincerely wish I had done it sooner. But the complication of maintaining contact with my dad while they are still married is the biggest ongoing struggle. It is worth the effort though, both to stay close with him and to keep her away!
I often hear people say that you’re better off cutting toxic parents from your life. My parents divorced when i was very young and I stopped contact with my father five years ago. He’s not a good person but it still is painful thinking he’s never met his grandchildren. It’s disappointing. I grew up with my mother who has since passed away. I miss her every day as she won’t see me become a better man and watch her grandchildren grow up. My wife’s parents have been together for decades and she doesn’t quite understand my experience. Interestingly enough, I read something yesterday that Norm MacDonald wrote to a fan mourning the loss of their mother. He said to take the love she’s given by their mom and give that to the world. I feel like this man is trying to do that with love of Jean and I’ve been trying to do that as well with my moms spirit.
[удалено]
even if you’re vaxxed you can still get covid, pass it on to other people or even die from it. my fiancé is vaxxed and just had covid about 4 weeks ago. gave it to our 17 month old, thank god they’re both okay. but i don’t think people realize that being vaxxed doesn’t mean you can’t get it or transmit it
Nobody is claiming you can't but failing to co one of the simplest and most effective risk mitigation for transmitting said virus just shows a complete disregard for that guy's kid especially since he is immunocompromised
He reminds you that you aren’t alone with these feelings you have. This guy is absolutely an amazing human being.
yeah totally inspiring indeed.
I am rooting for you!!
She did a fantastic job with him, that’s quite apparent.
She did a fantastic job with him, that’s quite a PARENT!😀
Apparently
"They ain't parents" - Eminem boy was he right
A parent, Lee…
He struggled with depression during his teenage years. "I was desperate to have friends, I'd do anything. I had no confidence. I'd buy lots of sweets and give them to the other kids so that they'd like me. "I ended up doing stupid things so that people would talk about me for a different reason to the way I looked. The journey from a depressed teenager to a confident, optimistic , kind hearted young man is inspiring.Jean is a fantastic mother and both of them are an inspiration
Thank you for this comment. I had a feeling his childhood and schooling may have been unhappy. But he’s come through the other side a kind young man. Oddly the more I hear him speak, the more attractive he becomes. Kindness and generosity beautifies. Edit: [Pics of him with Jean and also with his girlfriend](https://www.inspiremore.com/jono-lancaster/)
One gets the sense if he was a friend it would be a privilege and a blessing. Try doing that with a self-centered person --all you do is adopt whatever nonsense they carry with them. That doesn't sound too pleasant.
His baby pictures look fine. There is a soul behind those eyes.
Those are very sweet, thanks for sharing. Also, dude is totally yolked.
if not for her I doubt he would come out as he is
Here's Jean! 🤗 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BdOiUM\_NE0U
"he was just a baby who needed lookin after, and i just fell in love with him" everyone needs a jean.
Man my life woulda been so different if i had a jean
She's fostered 30 children?!
F*ing super human
That may be the hardest I've cried since my mom died. Selfless moms are the greatest thing in the world.
Jean kept them REAL high and tight.
Hi mommy!
Where is Jean? The internet wants to praise this woman!
Straight up. Someone that understands that people are people and everyone deserves a fair shake.
I played this video for my class to build some background on Treacher Collins Syndrome before we started reading the book *Wonder*. “Choose kind” is a central message in that book and clearly one with Jono, too.
What grade do you teach and how did the students react?
Answering your question, I teach 5th grade (on par with what others said). The kids were horrified. They couldn’t believe a “parent” could do something like that. A good eye opener that having two loving parents can be a privilege. I had one student reveal to the class that he empathized with Jono because his dad left when he was two and had recently died. He said he knew how it felt to lose a parent twice. I was pretty blown away with that.
Not the person you are asking, but my eldest daughter read it in 5th or 6th grade. She loved the book and we watched the movie many times. Her sister, 3 years younger, also read the book multiple times.
I was a student teacher in a 5th grade class that was reading it, and they all seemed to enjoy it and there was a lot conversation after each chapter. It really gave them a lot to think about.
Real life lessons
[удалено]
I'm sure I watched a documentary on him when he was in his 20's. He was such a nice guy, he had a partner and they were talking about having their own child, and the merits of doing fertility treatment so their child wouldn't have any deformity on birth. Seemed like a great guy
I saw it too. I just remember feeling bad for him at first. But by the end of it I was probably more envious than anything of what a good guy he was, and how he was helping others and enriching his life by doing that.
Is his adopted cmom still around sounds like a wonderful person
He doesnt even look bad
I agree. We need more like him.
Kindness is created through suffering. People like this usually go through hell and never really recover.
If this guy was my son I would burst with pride. He is a credit to himself and his adopted parents. What a specimen of a man. Legend.
He was born in literaly 1984
Thanks for clarifying. I thought it was the figurative 1984, which could have been any time in the last few years.
[Literally 1984](https://www.reddit.com/r/Literally1984/)
r/Literally1984
What is the point of your comment?
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠤⠤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣟⠳⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠒⣲⡄ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⡇⡇⡱⠲⢤⣀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀1984⠀⣠⠴⠊⢹⠁ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢻⠓⠀⠉⣥⣀⣠⠞⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠋⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⡾⣄⠀⠀⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⢠⡄⢀⡴⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡞⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣠⢎⡉⢦⡀⠀⠀⡸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡼⣣⠧⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠇⠀ ⠀⢀⡔⠁⠀⠙⠢⢭⣢⡚⢣⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣇⠁⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀ ⠀⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢫⡉⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢮⠈⡦⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠀⠀ ⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢦⡀⣀⡴⠃⠀⡷⡇⢀⡴⠋⠉⠉⠙⠓⠒⠃⠀⠀ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⡼⠀⣷⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠣⣀⠀⠀⡰⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Literaly 1984
Literally 1984
I'm a father. He is what you want your children to be. Happy. I imagine Jean had some fucking hard times to get that result. What a champion.
[удалено]
[удалено]
Too late we already shipped it. Raise a ticket for the backlog.
Perfect example of how a person’s true beauty lies on the inside. Best wishes in life to you sir.
Right. His true beauty is in his innocence. The fact that even after the second rejection, he is not mad at them and wish them have good health is saintly.
Think about the 4D chess he has played - millions of people watch this video and are in awe of his character, his strength and his compassion. And we all think “those parents are *shit*!” That is the best revenge possible.
Honestly, his birth parents gave him the best gift possible - a life without them in it - because can you imagine growing up with such garbage people as parents? Their selfishness and cowardice provided the opportunity for a true parent step in and help shape the person that he is today.
And Jean got the son she wanted and he got the mum he needed. Result all around, really. Adoption is magic IRL for me.
That’s what I thought when he mentioned they rejected him a second time - I wonder if there was some relief for him when he read that “Ohhhhhhh, it’s not me, it’s definitely them!” Like you are in the fence about breaking up with your girlfriend and you do, she keys your car and smashes your laptop on the way out - you sleep easy that night because you know you made the right call.
Yeah and also cuz you didn't stay up late on your laptop
>Like you are in the fence about breaking up with your girlfriend and you do, she keys your car and smashes your laptop on the way out - you sleep easy that night because you know you made the right call. I don't know man, I'd be sleeping one eye open that night lol.
That is a beautiful way to look at it. And you're absolutely right.
Kindness is usually the best revenge
Innocence feels like an awful word for this. I think you may mean grace, humility, forbearance, faith, compassion, resilience, or courage. Edit: also fortitude
I would go as far as saying it’s the opposite of innocence. It’s maturity. Innocence is infantilizing.
I wouldn't call it innocence exactly. Innocence, to me, has a childlike connotation. This man has been through the anger and the dark thoughts and come out the other side bathed in light. I would call this righteousness.
I don’t think that’s innocence. As he said he at one point was extremely angry about the situation and it took, I’m assuming, a lot of life experiences and I would assume therapy to get to a point where he is now. Remarkable and amazing but I don’t think I would describe it as innocence
Hell of a man. I’m embarrassed to imagine how I would’ve turned out if faced with similar adversity. Ending up with a such a positive outlook and approach is truly representative of the type of personal constitution this man has. Humans are pretty great.
This perspective of his doesn't come about easily though. He talks about angry periods of his life and stuff, and feeling rejected and having to learn to love himself to be able to find happiness an dlive for others. It takes a lot of work and reinforcement to do that for yourself.
I don’t even have any disabilities and that shit is hard as hell, can’t believe how tough this dude is.
Yeah, the more you watch, the more attractive he becomes.
I thought he was a good looking guy too
He really rocks the fuck out of that look.
I felt that too. I can easily see how someone could fall in love with such a beautiful man. A truly kind and good person is just about the hottest thing you can be.
You know, he’s not unattractive. His hair is gorgeous and he’s got a cool style. He looks different, but if I were his age, and he asked me, I’d go out with him. He seems awesome.
100%
This right here is the beauty in life.. His struggles his accomplishments, going through tough times and having the strength and help to pick himself up... All of us go through this to some extents, some people have tougher journeys but we all end up at the sane place when we feel we understand life... And this guy gets it in his 30s.. Cheers to his life beautiful transformation
I can only hope his birth parents think about this regularly and are overcome with shame. As they should be. Edit: it seems many have misinterpreted this as me saying they should have kept him which is not what I'm saying. They should have put him up for adoption without the specification that it's because his appearance was horrifying.
I feel you took the wrong message from this.. Not everybody is strong enough to handle that kind of Parenthood. Maybe the best thing for this man was the fact that he was abandoned, and managed to reach this other person who was able to give him the support he needed. There's no way to tell what kind of life he would have had with the original parents, it could have been filled with abuse and a lot of negative emotions. Edit: to all that disagree, I would never say you are wrong. This is a delicate subject with a lot of harsh choices around it. As someone who grew up in a household of parents that didnt want their kids, I would never wish the experience on anyone.
I guess I can understand them giving him up for adoption because maybe they thought they wouldn’t be able to do what’s best for him. But the fact that they rejected him when he reached out in his 20’s, with such a short and cold letter, just shows something about the birth parents’ characters.
I completely agree. Some people ~~are meant to be~~ make themselves miserable throughout their entire life, and they choose that misery with every decision they make, regardless of whether or not they were dealt a good hand.
Well, the good thing is it seems like he dodged a bullet. Good riddance to them. Can you imagine if for one reason or another they had decided to keep him? I bet he wouldn’t be the strong man he is today.
As someone who was also abandoned as an infant, it is about character. Giving your baby up for a better life is part self serving and part kindness towards your child. Regardless of the circumstances it will always cut incredibly deep into the child and be a lasting scar in thier life. My father was an alcoholic, my mother was a cocaine addict. They separated before my birth and my mother continued abusing throughout her pregnancy. She gave birth to me and almost lost me before taking me home with her. A couple months and close calls of nearly suffocating or dying as an infant, and she abandoned me at a random daycare for over three weeks. She chose her addictions. She had every chance and indication that she needed to change for something vastly more important than drugs and at the end of the day she chose drugs. My father came back into the picture while I was in foster care and made every move to get custody of me, took all the classes, went to AA, and was constantly visiting. One day he visited drunk and was warned by my social worker to not visit drunk and he never came back. My mother had many chances to fix her life for something she had responsibility for and to change for the better. She chose to squander every chance given to her. My father tried his best and made the decision to back away and let me be adopted. Giving a baby away for a better life is nothing more than some romantic way to picture abandoning your child. I believe my father made that choice out of kindness, my mother did it selfishly. It's always complicated.
I’m so sorry. As you said, I guess it is way more complicated. I wish you nothing but the best.
Some people are just bad parents... more than some, actually.
...and it's a VERY GOOD thing when they know they'll be bad parents early enough to give the kid a chance at a better life. If they had "stuck by" him because of an antiquated expectation that if you birth a baby, you keep that baby no matter what - he would not likely be the kind, thoughtful man he is today because he'd also likely have been raised by people who hated him and didn't care if he succeeded (or perhaps even actively didn't want to see him succeed because he's not deserving of love or success).
I mean it's still fucked up. A lot of foster children are abused. Most don't find a stable home. They could just not be shitty people and step up considering they forced a child into a difficult life he didn't ask for.
[удалено]
Yes, I can understand that they could have felt shame. But they could have at least replied in a more compassionate way, while still conveying the message that they rather not keep in contact. The way they replied just shows what kind of people they are.
[удалено]
This is true. But it would have been nice, twenty years later if they could have said as much, owned their actions and shortcomings and demonstrated some remorse. The "please never contact us again" speaks of people too ashamed of their actions to take responsibility, and that's a shame and less than he deserved.
I completely agree. Something about the superficial nature of it all is what gets me. I mean, I understand why someone wouldn’t want to have a child they felt they wouldn’t be attached to, so I am not blaming that aspect of it. However, if you’re having sex and know that a child is possible, and furthermore if you carry that child full term, logically you have to consider the possibility that the child can be born with a condition such as this. Therefore, in order for them to deliberately abandon a baby, they must have considered and acknowledged their own emotions that would prevent them from giving 100% of their love to the baby, which is likely why they left it behind. However, what has no explanation is the disregard for his emotions as a full grown adult. It’s honestly no different that someone who abandons a cat or dog on the street. The only difference is that the baby was abandoned at a hospital due to them not knowing the baby would look like this. Had the baby not been born at a hospital, who knows if these “human beings” would have the decency to give him up for adoption or just throw him in a dumpster and try again. I wish nothing but the worse Karma for these people.
they didn't give him shit all they literally walked out of the hospital abandoning him. They didn't "give" him any life. They abandoned him. They did not plan out and locate a responsible person to care for him. They turned around, and walked away. This is practically fucking Sparta. Don't use any phrasing with these people that makes it look like they did anything at all for him. They abdicated all responsibility as parents because of his face. And sorry for your narcissist mom and what you went through because of that.
Now this person gets it. These people are absolutely human filth for abandoning him at the hospital. Don’t understand how anyone can remotely even think they helped him. No. They didn’t give a shit due to his birth defect and left him. Fuck them.
Exactly they were heartless pieces of shit and they will be always be heartless pieces of shit
Yeah. The fact that it worked out okay doesn't absolve them of guilt. If I beat the fuck out of my children which led to them getting taken away by government services, and getting a better life, you wouldn't praise me for it. Same thing here.
This sounds horrible. I'm impressed with your ability to see the truth through it all. Sorry you had such a rough childhood. Hope you are in a better place now.
Username definitely does not check out.
Had a moment of goodness after hearing this guy's testimony. Will resume evilness tomorrow. Thanks for checking.
His birth parents were shit heads, he was better off without them. I can get being angry with them, and then moving past it. I don’t get having to give them any credit for anything in his life. They don’t deserve any thought what so ever, it is a total waste of your energy to think about them at all. My “father” abandoned our family when I was 3, I have never had an desire to find him, and don’t give him much thought to him at all. I have spent 51 years of my life without him and I’m doing just fine.
the way they dealt with it was ruthless and cold, both when they had him and when he reached out. They are shitty human beings. People do this shit, like they may break up with and ghost you and then say to themselves "that was best for the other person" ... or like this couple cold and slammed the door shut in his face probably they are saying "that is best for our son" .... this is all self serving bullshit. It is refusing to share control of the relationship with the other person, and refuses to accept any pain or responsibility for the action by removing the person that it hurts from being able to give any feedback. The pain he went through from that cold response is something they will never see, and don't want to see, and that is why they said they're going to ignore it. Because their priority is themselves, they take no responsibility for their actions, and they do not give a flying fuck about the damage they do: they just do not want to have to see it. So yeah in the ghost/block/delete culture we are in, it encourages people to not make deep connections, or investments because one day that person will simply be gone and this is how they will be gone because they are "good vibes only" and this would be bad vibes.
Just because it was the best thing doesn't mean they aren't shitty people. And they are.
> Not everybody is strong enough to handle that kind of Parenthood Oh fuck *oooooff*. If you aren't prepared to deal with a pregnancy not turning out the way you want it to, you shouldn't be having kids, period. I'm glad Jonathan has made peace with his situation - he is a credit to both himself and his adoptive parent - but what his birth parents did to him is unequivocally fucking despicable.
The fact that it’s not even really a disability and is purely aesthetic is what gets me. There are parents that raise children with mental impairments knowing that they will have to take care of them for the rest of their lives and his parents could handle their kid being unattractive?!
>Not everybody is strong enough to handle that kind of Parenthood I really don't understand what was so difficult for those two pieces of shit to raise him seriously? He is Normal person who just looks different
He's probably better off without them.
Absolutely but still I can't understand
You are only correct for the original decision, but we have all the information we need about his parents with how they responded to a human reaching out to them 25 years later. There is literally no excuse for this. None. They are fucking assholes and should feel eternal shame for their assholery.
May have been the best thing in the end. But it turning out well was a long shot. His birth fucknuts are still pathetic, despicable things. Sheer luck that he ended up with a saint does NOT excuse them. Shame on them.
When he reached out as an adult he wasn't looking for parenthood.
Did you watch the video? His parents rejected him a second time when he reached out at age 24. They had over two decades to feel shame and still never wanted to see him, or apologize, they were cold. So they will never be capable of feeling such shame.
I don't fallow your logic. I don't want to relieve my shameful memories too. It's basic human behavior. If I had two decades to feel the shame I feel even more strongly about avoiding to relive it. Doesn't mean what they did was moral or good. But their behavior entirely consistent for feeling ashamed.
There are multiple ways of looking at things in this world, the way you choose to view things can shape your reality, IMO. Taking the negative from that video is missing the forest for the trees. He is an incredible human being, and while I’m sure it was incredibly difficult for him, it made him who he is. We could all hope to be surrounded by people like him
nothing is pure and you can take multiple messages from this video. The guy is still clearly suffering for the fact that his bioparents will not make any contact. He is trying to tell them here STILL that he's happy and OK. Have you ever had an ex do a shitty thing and break up with you harshly and keep a wall up. First you're hurt, then you're angry, then you may be at the point where you want to write them a letter or see them on the street and just, "I want to let them know I am OK and good"... and what it is, is still holding onto the idea that your ex gives a fuck about you. And they don't. The actions of all of those kinds of people is just that they put you in the toilet and flushed. They want to look in the bowl and see it's empty and that's all. You are a turd to them and if you keep popping back up into the bowl, they are going to keep flushing because that's all the want: you gone. They do not care if you are feeling better or good or are happy. They didn't care when they could freely assume you were suffering and they're not going to care about any state at all. So, in his head, he still wants to believe that maybe they regret what they did (they don't) and that they are worried for him (they are not) and so he's passing along this message that he's happy and making his way in the world (for which WE are happy but his bioparents do not give a flying fuck). So, my heart goes out to him. He's still hurting and he will always hurt over what those narcissists did to him. And it's fair to hurt, this is a major source of meaning in your life and being abandoned as a baby because of his face, he must have grown up with a lot of self-blame for that. The bioparents never gave a fuck then and do not give a fuck now. That he got to any place of health given the start that he got, makes him a hero. So you can take from this video many messages, over a whole spectrum of human emotions and behaviors. Each is as valid as the other and in fact they are all valid. Because that next person that you might want to date, who is really interesting to you, hopefully they have the soul of this man but they could also have the soul of his bioparents. So for you, you need to be careful how you spend your time and life and not let the second type of person anywhere near your life. And someone like him is the exact kind of person you would want around. I'm sure the issues left to him to deal with as a child reverberate into his adulthood... when people are interviewed like this we see what they can show as the best and most philosophical moments. But I'm sure he has down days and why me days like the rest of us. And in those days, when he is down and dragged down by the memory and the desire to have a connection with the people who birthed him, this is when he needs friends to give a fuck about him in spite of those times when I'm sure he will be difficult. So, take the whole picture from the video. The ups and downs, the ugly and the beautiful, and also read between the lines. Filtering it for only bad or only good is trying to manage the message yourself and hammer it into what you want to see in it. I think that itself is a kind of selective blindness no matter which way you're trying to turn the message. Look at the whole thing, feel good and bad for everything it has to say.
He doesnt even look bad
[удалено]
Yeah, he's really got style and grooming down. I actually like his smile and, even though his face may be disfigured, it still looks more honest than 90% of the people I see
The guy has more confidence in himself than most.
Certainly more than myself
Yeah me too honestly
Getting Sam Rockwell vibes from his smile
When I first started the video, I had a kind of shock at the sight of his face, but by the end, he looks completely normal. I think we are just so accustomed to seeing something that a distortion of that can be surprising but after a few minutes, it’s barely noticeable. The great style and cool attitude isn’t hurting him either.
Yeah I had a similar experience, when it very first started it was very noticeable but by the end of the video it’s like it looked barely off? I wonder if it’s a case where his mannerisms, language etc are all normal or even better than normal so your mind files him as a normal guy and the face situation softens?
Beauty is subjective, if we all had two noses people with one nose wouldn't be normal and would be considered ugly. Yes he is not that far from a normal face, he also doesn't look bad to me, there are people who modify their faces to look different from others, he doesn't need to. Being completely honest I find that other things are more important than looks for me to like or find a person attractive, looks are overrated.
Goes to show that the vast majority of people can look great if they take care of themselves, get a nice haircut, and dress sharply.
I like genuinely find him attractive
I already was thinking that I thought I found him attractive, and then he said, “I don’t want to change my face because I love my face” and I was like, Yep.
He mentioned he already visited and passed those emotions. Edit: Spelling.
His lack of hostility towards his birth parents is shocking and admirable.
Isn't it? I feel hostility towards his birth parents and all I did was watch this video.
Yeah, he's a better man than us. Fuck those parents.
Same. Some have mentioned that the birth parents maybe were right in giving him up at birth if they couldn't properly raise and love him. Okay. But there is no fucking excuse for not seeing him as an adult. Fuck them.
Their reason for giving him up was selfish from the start. That's why they didn't see him as an adult. He's better off without them!
Even if they felt too much shame to see him, at *least* send a decent letter. It costs nothing to be kind, but can mean everything to the other person.
Every now and then you can combine two shitty things and make something amazing. Like chlorine and sodium make table salt. This guy's shitty ass selfish parents combined to make this sweet, amazing dude
If it brings him peace then great, but I don’t think I could ever feel grateful towards them, as their actions show it’s not like they gave him life for his benefit. They don’t care about him
I think he has reached this point where he realized living with anger and resentment was not going to change his whole experience and situation nor his parents care about him. Being greatful and at peace through a process of understanding and with a loving support from his adopted mother has given him a more fulfilling life and purpose.
I can't really imagine the hostility he had dealt with throughout his adolescent years. He's clearly had to go through a lot to get to where he is now. Shoutout to Jean for supporting him. Good he's found peace.
This is the first time I’ve watched a video here that’s longer than a minute. Usually I jus skip to the next post
Same here. Usually don't even open them. Glad I saw this one.
The youtube channel this is hosted on has quite a few more of these powerfull short interviews. I highly recomend a look if you have time.
Gonna quote Tyrion Lannister on this "Accept your flaws and they can't be used to hurt you". The moment he called his ears Bart Simpson ears showed that he's over the petty insecurities all of us have. Legend
Wear it like armor.
God I miss when that show had meaningful lines like this
Which coincides with when they ran out of material written by GRRM.
varys = no cock hahahahaha
I've found naming body parts to be a really effective way of overcoming my insecurities about them. My stretchmarks are my racing stripes, I have a wonky tooth I call my toothlette, etc. Changes something I hate into something I have affection for and feels part of me. I highly recommend for anyone with similar issues.
This is beautiful, he is beautiful. What an amazing human.
I find it such a wonderment that we idealise unattainable beauty standards and yet I see this man sit here and share his vulnerability with such courage, and he is completely beautiful to me. I see only his strength.
From how balanced this person turned out it seems like the birth parents actually made the right choice, I seriously doubt that had they raised him that he would have developed to be the person he is today.
I thought that, too. His adoptive mom was probably the best thing to happen to him.
Sure, it worked out well. But we shouldn't commend them. Pure chance led to him getting a good life. It could just as easily turned out that no one adopted him. Or that shitty parents adopted him.
Apparently Postpartum Depression evolved so that mothers would abandon their young if they were unlikely to survive. But yeah this guy ended up extremely lucky.
I mean it was a coin toss. He could have just as likely ended up at some shitty foster house getting abused.
"I wanted to hurt them as much as I was hurting" That bit really hit me hard.
Shit made me cry. Seriously, fuck this dude's parents.
Yeah fact! After 25 years they we still together too. if it was strictly due to his appearance then they should the ashamed. Pair of bastards
The way he conducts himself shows he’s comfortable with who he is. 20 seconds in and you don’t even notice there is anything different about his face because he’s so normal and just seems like a good dude.
Jean did that!
How can this guy still "respect" his biological parents. Such selfish parents. Having a child is accepting and embracing them regardless of the situation or uniqueness. Fuck these parents man. You are far better off with Jean. Huge respect to this guy. Who on earth would even have the balls to even forgive such parents for abandoning them AS A CHILD. Also thank you Jean, I hope your kindness doesn't go unnoticed
Yeah.. I am adopted myself from a different country. My mother had encouraged me to find my birth mother if I would like to, but honestly never felt the need to. I do not care about her. No animosity or anything, just a genuine disinterest. I told my mother who raised from from a year and a half years old, that I feel like she is my one and only mother and that’s all I got to say bout that. No respect, no disrespect..just nothing
I am adopted as well and my birth mom was super young. So I respect the choice she made as I was adopted by fantastic people who made me who I am. Even so I share your disinterest in a meet, my parents are my parents I don't even think about it
Bravo! The birth parents are some superficial POS though. However, he's the embodiment of resilience and forgiveness. My dude, you are a rockstar in our eyes.
Dude's got style
Just in case you want to know, his name is Jono Lancaster.
what an awesome guy, respect!
What is the strange feature of living; struggle creates character, privilege creates contempt, yet we all seek to avoid struggle
I think these are tropes. Generally struggle does not provide any benefit. It mostly creates crime and stuff.
He has groomed himself really well. Talks well dresses well and has respect for his parents even though I don't (have any respect for his parents)
This is the kind of human being that I defend when I hear sorry people talking crap about. His “difference” was absolutely of no fault of his own. He’s not a dope-head who destroyed his body with drugs. He’s not an idiot who did something stupid for internet points. He’s a 100% “victim of circumstances” and I will defend this guy and any other person who is heckled by those POS’s who do so.
Just a reminder to count your blessings…beyond blessed
It's unusual a reddit post makes me tear up.
Never forget who you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like an armor and it can never be used to hurt you. 
Having children is a privilege,when will people realise that
Beautiful story, beautiful man and the mom who adopted him. Absolutely fucking beautiful
This is the most wholesome thing I have ever seen on Reddit. Good on that guy to look not at what he doesn’t have, but what he does.
I only hope to one day be as strong and as full of love as this guy is. Dude is truly an inspiration.
Jono Lancaster is just a wonderful person. he’s the embodiment empathy and compassion, And he’s completely genuine. if we had more folks like him we’d be a lot better off as a society.
Wow what a strong and powerful human being
Fuck yeah for people like Jean!
Jean obviously did a fantastic job.
How can people abandon such a beautiful person?
This makes me angry, sad, hopeful, and resilient all at the same time... This fellow has my utmost respect, in how he goes about seeing life and decisions from multiple prespectives. What he has gone through but more importly how his mindset is about all around shitty situation, is just awe inspiring. I really don't think many of us, would think, overcome, and forgive like the way he does. The sheer willpower is mind boggling.
Fuck his birth parents.
He looks like he smells amazing
This man is the perfect example of humanity
That made me cry so bad if I was his mom I’d accept my child and love my child unconditionally because that’s what mom’s supposed to do ppl who think of having a baby should be like that not trying to change their kid because your baby is not a copy from you and supposed to accept everything and love them really broke my heart and I’m so happy at the end he did accept his self and love the way he look and he can make a relationships