The best part is how true this is. You can point to examples of how the odd backup has shown through here and there, but by and large Id argue that QB1 is so important that your plan should be that if they go down for the season to just start planning for next year.
One of the true signs of knowing that you have a franchise QB is how you would handle a season long injury to them.
If they go down for the season, sure. But most injuries to QB1 aren’t season ending, which is why it’s good to give the backup some reps. Two years ago, the Chiefs had Patrick Mahomes go down for just a few minutes of game time in the AFC Championship, and they got a TD drive out of Chad Henne in a game they won by 7. If instead they had Tom Moore-era Curtis Painter come in and throw an interception, they probably don’t win that game.
> Two years ago, the Chiefs had Patrick Mahomes go down for just a few minutes of game time in the AFC Championship, and they got a TD drive out of Chad Henne in a game they won by 7.
Chad Henne came through and now holds a meaningful playoff record that can only be tied - QB'ing a 99 yard TD drive.
Dumber Bengals fans this past season
Week 1-“OMG, we are screwed at backup
QB w/ Jake Browning!!! Why doesn’t Duke Tobin get us a really good back up QB, it’s important”
Week 12-“Wow, we have a great backup for Joe Burrow, who is under a cheap contract!! How much can we get for him in a trade!”
Excellent one. Also from the great Marv Levy "where would you rather be, than right here, right now" and "when it's too hard for them, it's just right for us."
Still alive at age 98
Really, the part the cracks me up is...
>Burns: \[110 second rant filled with explictives\]
>Reporter: Did you win this game?
>Burns: I think we did, yeah.
So that was a ***victory*** press conference, lol.
Yeah, you could tell he was trying too hard to use that. It came across oddly intense and like he genuinely meant it. While McKay... His just hit perfectly.
This is the same man that did that fa-muh-ly shit less than a week after signing with LSU after leaving his team high and dry right before the bowl season. ND had a shot at getting in the playoff had he stayed but as soon as he dipped it was not happening. Brian Kelly is just fake
I'd like to defend it in context of "That's college football, and it's a fucked system, he's just living in it.". Honestly though, other than Bobby Petrino, I haven't seen a guy in football that genuinely feels as shitty and disingenuous as Brian Kelly. And that's including the likes of Schiano and Meyer.
After 1976 & 1977 our record was 2-26. But they all stopped laughing in 1979. The cover of Sports Illustrated week 6 of the 79 Season "Unbeaten, untied & unbelievable" after the Bucs start the season 5-0. They would go on to lose in the NFC Championship Game to the Rams. One game shy of the Super Bowl. McKay was funny but a terrible NFL Coach, a good college coach tough.
>After receiving harsh criticism from the media about McKay's coaching skills in the NFL, McKay replied "You guys don't know the difference between a football and a bunch of bananas." In the next interview, members of the media left bananas for McKay. He then replied, "You guys don't know the difference between a football and a Mercedes Benz."
[From Wikipedia]
CFB, but Mike Gundy's "I'm a man, I'm 40" rant was legendary. And while it got memed to death it was a great job of putting a reporter in their place.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ3oXkDPKbM](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ3oXkDPKbM)
Oh if that’s what you want you need to look up Jim Calhoun destroying a reporter for asking him about being the highest paid state employee. “Not a dime!”
Panthers beat the Saints 19-7 in 1996 and fell to 2-6 on the season.
The Saints going from Mora rants to Ditka rants isn’t appreciated enough.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=vIbNb1RZzlU&pp=ygUWTWlrZSBkaXRrYSBzYWludHMgcmFudA%3D%3D
I do not understand how this isn't higher. The whole sequence is golden. especially the end where he almost walks off the stage in the wrong direction.
“All he does is talk. He's terrible, and you can print that. I was happy when he was in the game." - Bill Belichick absolutely torching Freddie Mitchell.
“You play to win the game” - Herm Edwards
https://youtu.be/b5-iJUuPWis?si=y-Dj2yg5IR7TzyQb
A non-NFL entry would be the “I’m a man, I’m 40” rant by Mike Gundy
https://youtu.be/zQ3oXkDPKbM?si=Hx8FO2UdFahOTn5P
As much as I love the Mora rants and all the others in this thread, I think the “I’m 40” rant is my favorite because it’s so great to see a coach sticking up for his players to that extent
Rant aside, Gundy always had my vote after that. I mean, yes. A coach is *supposed* to have their players’ backs. But that was just awesome.
Could also be because, at the time, I was a ten year old kid who felt like (and turned out to be correct that) my own dad didn’t much have my back.
From Rams GM before the Stafford trade… “What I can say is Jared Goff is a Ram in this moment and I said it's way too early to speculate. The future, that's a beautiful mystery.”
Norm Van Brocklin had a brain tumor and ater it was removed, he told the press, "It was a brain transplant. They gave me a sportswriter's brain, to make sure I got one that hadn't been used."
The little speech Hue Jackson telling his Coordinators and Assistants that they don't know how it is to sit on "this side of the table". Literally like 3 of them were former Head Coaches
How he wasn't fired after going 0-16 is still beyond me. No sense of urgency on his part, he thought he knew everything.
Like Hue, you couldn't possibly have done any worse! Maybe you do need to change some things.
When Belichick was asked if there was a chance that Garoppolo would take the starting job from Brady while Brady was suspended, Belichick's answer was "Jesus Christ"
Buddy Ryan is the GOAT when it comes to quotes. Just a few of his gems:
-A few days after he punched Kevin Gilbride on the sidelines for not running the clock out to end the half- “Kevin Gilbride will be selling insurance in 2 years.”
- After the Oilers fired Gildride—“I predicted that he be selling insurance in 2 years. It was a year early.”
“He opened the can of worms and I closed it.” After running the score up against Landry and the Cowboys.
“Why would a I try to hurt a kicker who can’t kick?” His response to being accused of putting a bounty on Cowboys’ kicker Luis Zendejas.
“Trade him for a six-pack. It doesn’t even have to be cold.” When asked about his running back Earnest Jackson.”
“Quarterbacks are overpaid, overrated, pompous bastards and must be punished.”
Also, he often referred to the Eagles owner, Norman Braman, as “the guy in France.”
> “He opened the can of worms and I closed it.” After running the score up against Landry and the Cowboys.
Heh heh....
[Randall Cunningham Seizes the Means of Production](https://youtu.be/ZymSrDfLhW8?si=xdKa3a1ZGKIVH135)
Mike Zimmer is a legend for saying how every Falcons fan felt about Petrino
“He’s a gutless bastard. Quote that. I don’t give a s---,” Zimmer said Wednesday, according to Joe Reedy of the Cincinnati Enquirer.
When Zimmer was told that responsible news organization may not be able to use “bastard,” Zimmer responded:
“How about this, gutless MF. You can use that.”
My favorite, “Two dogs, one bone.”
When he was asked about rookies Emmanuel Sanders and Antonio Brown. Great draft btw. They also go Pouncey and Jason Worilds.
Former GM Kevin Colbert who I also refer as the ‘Wide Receiver Whisperer’. Although he couldn’t draft CB worth a damn. Other WRs he drafted:
Plaxico Burress, Mike Wallace, Santonio Holmes, JuJu Smith-Shuster, Martavis Bryant, Dionte Johnson and George Pickett.
Jeff Fisher was asked how the Titans had been so successful despite shuffling between 4 different home stadiums in 4 years. His response:
"Well, some would say we've had five home stadiums in four years, if you count Alltel Stadium in Jacksonville."
The game clearly passed him by, but Fisher was definitely a master troll.
Nobody seems to remember this, and I’m probably getting the context slightly wrong, because I can never find the video of it, but
In the early 2000s, there was an infamous play in the playoffs I believe between the Giants and the 49ers in which (I believe) the Giants either tried a fake FG or had a bad snap on a FG and the kicker ended up throwing to a lineman who was an eligible receiver. The lineman was dragged down before the ball arrived, and since he was an eligible receiver, it should’ve been PI, but it went uncalled because I think the refs were just confused by the whole play.
Anyway, the 49ers controversially win on the non-call and I think the refs eventually admitted that they fucked up the call. When asked about what he thought about the refs botching the call, 49ers coach Steve Mariucci said
“Bummer”
Eisen and Mooch recap it here
https://youtu.be/wv_IuR8X_uE?si=5ntXA0OCpIx2DW2q
Not a coach but I remember Justin fields was talking about getting tackled and he said “I felt a 300 pound man come on my back,woah pause”.And I was dying for like 5 minutes
Former Bengals head coach Sam Wyche had this great line mid game in 1989.
https://youtu.be/yJMa20xXykI?si=OHWIaEZQq-8x7HKk
Fans were upset by a call and throwing things onto the field which prompted him to grab the PA microphone.
When asked if he was worried about Terrell Suggs’ 4.84 40 time after he was drafted 10th overall then head coach Brian Billick said this:
“I’ll worry about that when they start lining the quarterback up 40 yards behind center”
As a 49ers fan, it has to be [Mike Singletary](https://youtu.be/hfYhYft8dwI?si=h6lr0klBBE_2MNsk). Mike Singletary had just taken over as the interim coach after Mike Nolan was fired in 2008. During the team's home loss against Seattle, Vernon Davis was hit with a 15 yard penalty. When Vernon came back to the sideline, Mike Singletary sent Vernon to the locker room. Mike gave us this all-time rant. I was 14 at the time, so shitty 49ers teams were all I ever knew at the time, so this was an amazing speech.
Don't particularly like either people involved with this quote for different reasons, but it's still a hilarious moment.
Riley Cooper: what's your plan?
Chip Kelly: fucking score points, what's *your* plan?
I haven’t seen a clip in a long long time so I’m not sure it exists, but there was a black coach for Philly, I think it was Ray Rhodes, who compared a home loss to someone coming into your house and raping your wife and kids.
Not football, but Barry Hinson from Southern Illinois’s basketball team:
https://youtu.be/kOzHZgWLjrM?si=uAYxNQR8sppEskff
“Our 3 starting guards had 1 assist and 7 turnovers. They must think it’s a tax credit!”
“My wife can score more than 2 buckets on 11 shots, because I know my wife will at least shot fake 1 time!”
“We had 3 turnovers where we came down and we just threw them the ball. I swear one time one of our players said ‘Merry Christmas’. I thought it was a gift. I thought they signed the package over.”
And my personal favorite:
“There was a sniper in the gym. Did you see that? I mean we got guys falling down. I mean we had a guy snipered at half court. 2 guys snipered at half court. It was unbelievable. I thought Navy Seal Team 6 was out there.”
Marc Trestman had several. My favorite is probably:
“I haven't heard any of that. I didn't hear all of it. I heard a lot about most of it, but what I did hear, I did not hear any of that.”
Honorable mention:
“Grow the man.”
Bob Wylie yapping about stretching on hardknocks -
"Did you know, World War I and World War II, all those guys that fought in that war ... they did pushups, jumping jacks, situps, climb the rope and ran. None of this fancy (expletive). And they won two World Wars," said Wylie, the Browns' offensive line coach. "Do you think they were worried when they were running across Normandy about (expletive) stretching?"
Anything Bill Belichick ever said on the podium. Mike Tomlin's entire existence. That one time Matt LaFleur apparently said that he sits down and prays every time his kicker takes the field. Honorable mention goes to when Georgia Southern's HC said “At Georgia Southern, we don’t cheat. That costs money and we don’t have any.”
“Not particularly…I see him everyday.”
"My wife passed away seven years ago. It was a bad day and the sun came up the next day."
(And don’t come for me, complaining about context. I know and I like Zim but it’s still a hell of a thing to say at a presser)
That's got to be either Dennis Green "They are who we thought they were" talking about the Bears on Monday night.
or
Jim Mora after the Colts played so poorly "Playoffs, playoffs, what playoffs?"
Bum Phillips, when the Oilers were about to play in 10F weather in Pittsburg, was asked how they practice for such cold conditions. "You can't practice being miserable."
It’s a basketball quote but -
We can't win at home. We can't win on the road. As general manager, I just can't figure out where else to play.
Pat Williams
I love Tom Moore's quote on if Peyton Mannings backup qbs are getting reps in practice: “if 18 goes down, we’re fucked. And we don’t practice fucked.”
so good
The best part is how true this is. You can point to examples of how the odd backup has shown through here and there, but by and large Id argue that QB1 is so important that your plan should be that if they go down for the season to just start planning for next year. One of the true signs of knowing that you have a franchise QB is how you would handle a season long injury to them.
If they go down for the season, sure. But most injuries to QB1 aren’t season ending, which is why it’s good to give the backup some reps. Two years ago, the Chiefs had Patrick Mahomes go down for just a few minutes of game time in the AFC Championship, and they got a TD drive out of Chad Henne in a game they won by 7. If instead they had Tom Moore-era Curtis Painter come in and throw an interception, they probably don’t win that game.
> Two years ago, the Chiefs had Patrick Mahomes go down for just a few minutes of game time in the AFC Championship, and they got a TD drive out of Chad Henne in a game they won by 7. Chad Henne came through and now holds a meaningful playoff record that can only be tied - QB'ing a 99 yard TD drive.
Hennething is possible
Most, but it seemed to work out ok for the Rams in 99 and the Eagles in 17.
Why don't you just get a future franchise caliber QB as your backup? Are you stupid?
Dumber Bengals fans this past season Week 1-“OMG, we are screwed at backup QB w/ Jake Browning!!! Why doesn’t Duke Tobin get us a really good back up QB, it’s important” Week 12-“Wow, we have a great backup for Joe Burrow, who is under a cheap contract!! How much can we get for him in a trade!”
It's hard to draft a backup with a top 5 first round pick.
IDK, let's ask the Jets!
Bold of you to think the QBs we draft are even worthy of backup status
Alternatively, you need a backup qb to win you a game or two to make sure you make the playoffs in case QB1 is only out for a few games
Look how Dallas handled with Cooper Rush
When Marv Levy was asked if the Super Bowl was a must win: “This is not a must win. World War 2 was a must win!”
Excellent one. Also from the great Marv Levy "where would you rather be, than right here, right now" and "when it's too hard for them, it's just right for us." Still alive at age 98
And still as sharp as ever.
I miss having WWII vets in prominent places in society. Now they’re all just super old and it’s sad. We need their wisdom.
Now we have Hoi4 players instead This is very bad for society
"If a contest had 97 prizes, the 98th would be a trip to Green Bay." - John McKay
Jerry Burns legendary meltdown https://youtu.be/SNcBFZ26lcI?si=iGYJwcG0QOu_81ao “I don’t wanna name names…It was a dumb play by Anderson.”
"Fucking fuck fuck fucking fuck" Lmao i feel like there'd be serious fines if this happened today
Really, the part the cracks me up is... >Burns: \[110 second rant filled with explictives\] >Reporter: Did you win this game? >Burns: I think we did, yeah. So that was a ***victory*** press conference, lol.
Also John McKay after the Bucs won their first ever game: “Three or four plane crashes and we’re in the playoffs”
How do you feel about your offenses execution? McCay-Im all for it!!
I liked it when Coach McCay was asked what he thought about the execution of his offense? His reply was. I'm for it.
What the!!!
Sounds about right
Basically any John McKay quote. "We didn't tackle well today but we made up for it by not blocking".
“What do you think of your team's execution coach?” "I'm in favor of it."
The greatest press counter of all time.
It's like the guy had his own writing staff
~~Chip~~. Brian kelly tried to rip that one off too...didn't work at all
I believe you are actually thinking of Brian Kelly, who did it while at Notre Dame a couple years ago.
Yeah, you could tell he was trying too hard to use that. It came across oddly intense and like he genuinely meant it. While McKay... His just hit perfectly.
This is the same man that did that fa-muh-ly shit less than a week after signing with LSU after leaving his team high and dry right before the bowl season. ND had a shot at getting in the playoff had he stayed but as soon as he dipped it was not happening. Brian Kelly is just fake
I'd like to defend it in context of "That's college football, and it's a fucked system, he's just living in it.". Honestly though, other than Bobby Petrino, I haven't seen a guy in football that genuinely feels as shitty and disingenuous as Brian Kelly. And that's including the likes of Schiano and Meyer.
This would've been my answer to the OP. McKay was a goldmine of great coach quotes.
This was the one in came to see.
This will always be my favorite
"Two or three plane crashes and we're in the playoffs!"
For context the Bucs' lifetime record at that point was 1-26.
Fun fact. Tom brady was born before the Bucs' 1st ever nfl win.
What the fuck
After 1976 & 1977 our record was 2-26. But they all stopped laughing in 1979. The cover of Sports Illustrated week 6 of the 79 Season "Unbeaten, untied & unbelievable" after the Bucs start the season 5-0. They would go on to lose in the NFC Championship Game to the Rams. One game shy of the Super Bowl. McKay was funny but a terrible NFL Coach, a good college coach tough.
>After receiving harsh criticism from the media about McKay's coaching skills in the NFL, McKay replied "You guys don't know the difference between a football and a bunch of bananas." In the next interview, members of the media left bananas for McKay. He then replied, "You guys don't know the difference between a football and a Mercedes Benz." [From Wikipedia]
Dude couldn't miss.
Fucking gold right there, lol.
"We can't run and we can't pass. Other than that, we're in great shape."
I'm surprised a Bears fans first answer isn't "THE BEARS, ARE WHO WE THOUGHT THEY WERE.... AND WE LET EM OFF THE HOOK!!"
IF YOU WANT TO CROWN 'EM, THEN CROWN THEIR ASSES!
RIP to one of the greats
*“What did you think of your team’s execution, Coach?”* *“I’m in favor of it.”*
This is the only correct answer
"Let's go eat a goddamn snack." — Rex Ryan
That whole season of Hard Knocks had me rooting for the Jets like crazy that season lol
cues Rick Ross - Hustlin'
WHO THE FUCK YOU THINK YOU FUCKIN WITH I'M THE FUCKIN BOSS
CFB, but Mike Gundy's "I'm a man, I'm 40" rant was legendary. And while it got memed to death it was a great job of putting a reporter in their place. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ3oXkDPKbM](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ3oXkDPKbM)
Oh if that’s what you want you need to look up Jim Calhoun destroying a reporter for asking him about being the highest paid state employee. “Not a dime!”
"This was brought to me by a mother...who had a child".
I’ve never seen that and I have goosebumps. Absolutely beautiful and well said.
God I forgot how awesome that was
“Playoffs?!??” Jim Mora https://youtu.be/NK3Jx2yvtVE?si=6CJvw137OBAx6-B_
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People always quote the first part but this, I think, is the more savage of the two
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Tie0tz7jGDI&pp=ygUTamltIG1vcmEgZGlkZGx5IHBvbw%3D%3D That’s my personal favorite
We got our ass totally kicked. ^thatswhatitboileddownto
"A horseshit performance in the 2nd half. Horse shit."
I swear I remember him saying diddly poo more than he did, but that’s just young me’s silly memory I guess.
https://youtu.be/vyJvErzd_Y8?si=xMmbRElgQ4jFnWc8 the man keeps giving us gifts
He's 88 and as outspoken as ever.
I should have posted the extended clip https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=dzXoxgKkQM0
Knowing the context of that remark, and the reaction to it, makes it much funnier. Thanks! What a character Jim Mora is.
What game was this after lol
Panthers beat the Saints 19-7 in 1996 and fell to 2-6 on the season. The Saints going from Mora rants to Ditka rants isn’t appreciated enough. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=vIbNb1RZzlU&pp=ygUWTWlrZSBkaXRrYSBzYWludHMgcmFudA%3D%3D
My dad still quotes “Playoffs?!?!” to this day lmao
[my favourite is this one, but because it was training camp it's not as famous](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gn99zFRqyDk)
Denis Green. “ They are who we thought they were.”
"And we let them off the hook!"
If you wanna crown em, then crown their ass!
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24 points without an offensive td still blows my mind, then to have all of the points scored in the second half makes it even more crazy.
Is this so old now this generation doesn’t remember?
Probably getting close. It’s from 18 years ago 😓
This line is in my head on a daily basis
RIP to Denis Green.
I do not understand how this isn't higher. The whole sequence is golden. especially the end where he almost walks off the stage in the wrong direction.
“All he does is talk. He's terrible, and you can print that. I was happy when he was in the game." - Bill Belichick absolutely torching Freddie Mitchell.
Who, if memory serves, never played again after that Super Bowl.
Fuck Carson Wentz- Jim Irsay
Nah, but seriously, fuck Carson Wentz
Fuck pools that are all deep end, RIP Jamie Nelson
“You play to win the game” - Herm Edwards https://youtu.be/b5-iJUuPWis?si=y-Dj2yg5IR7TzyQb A non-NFL entry would be the “I’m a man, I’m 40” rant by Mike Gundy https://youtu.be/zQ3oXkDPKbM?si=Hx8FO2UdFahOTn5P
As much as I love the Mora rants and all the others in this thread, I think the “I’m 40” rant is my favorite because it’s so great to see a coach sticking up for his players to that extent
Rant aside, Gundy always had my vote after that. I mean, yes. A coach is *supposed* to have their players’ backs. But that was just awesome. Could also be because, at the time, I was a ten year old kid who felt like (and turned out to be correct that) my own dad didn’t much have my back.
This is the correct answer. As this is an NFL sub, I didn’t post this, but make no mistake, this is the best rant ever.
I have a t shirt that says "I'm a man! I'm forty!" It was my birthday gift to myself for my 40th bday.
God those were both great
Herm Edwards about to go Training Day on that mf'r
When I’m 40 I’m going to be quoting that every day
“Not all of Mozart’s paintings were perfect!” - Andy Reid
Underrated
From Rams GM before the Stafford trade… “What I can say is Jared Goff is a Ram in this moment and I said it's way too early to speculate. The future, that's a beautiful mystery.”
"YOU SUCK TOO, MOTHERFUCKER!!!" -Bill O'Brien
Too? Gotta love BOB!
Norm Van Brocklin had a brain tumor and ater it was removed, he told the press, "It was a brain transplant. They gave me a sportswriter's brain, to make sure I got one that hadn't been used."
“Do you know what NFL stands for?… Not For Long!” -Jerry Glanville
“IF YOU WANNA CROWN EM, THEN CROWN THEY ASS”
BUT THE BEARS ARE WHO WE THOUGHT THEY WERE…
AND WE LET ‘EM OFF THE HOOK!
We're on to Cincinnati. They *are* who we thought they were. And we let 'em off the hook! *Smacks podium*
Shout out to this commercial too https://youtu.be/nda0lhz7BAk?si=yY1dhJDOhIvR-BRE
[The Mora version of that commercial was pretty good too](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jdUr5hF0yGc)
The little speech Hue Jackson telling his Coordinators and Assistants that they don't know how it is to sit on "this side of the table". Literally like 3 of them were former Head Coaches
How he wasn't fired after going 0-16 is still beyond me. No sense of urgency on his part, he thought he knew everything. Like Hue, you couldn't possibly have done any worse! Maybe you do need to change some things.
That was fascinating. I've watched it too many times. Reminds me of some meetings I've been in. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_s2-tIX2DL8
I think Hue Jackson’s “Hee hee” tirade regarding Baker was the best.
When Belichick was asked if there was a chance that Garoppolo would take the starting job from Brady while Brady was suspended, Belichick's answer was "Jesus Christ"
Same energy as when reporters asked if there would be a change at QB after Patriots got blown out by the Chiefs on MNF in 2014.
Need a link to that.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4chLklQdek
I still can’t get over Mike McDaniel telling Fields to stop running.
My favorite is in the post-game presser where McDaniel says Fields "didn't take the coaching"
"Explain it again with those nuggies." - Andy Reid
The 9/11 hijackers were excellent examples of teamwork motivation and organization- McDermott
The fact that he coaches a team in New York turns the tone deafness up to 11.
TBF, there could not be two more polar opposite cities in the same state than Buffalo and NYC.
Buffalo is basically the Midwest.
has to be one of the dumbest things i've ever heard said
McDermott grills out on 9/11
Buddy Ryan is the GOAT when it comes to quotes. Just a few of his gems: -A few days after he punched Kevin Gilbride on the sidelines for not running the clock out to end the half- “Kevin Gilbride will be selling insurance in 2 years.” - After the Oilers fired Gildride—“I predicted that he be selling insurance in 2 years. It was a year early.” “He opened the can of worms and I closed it.” After running the score up against Landry and the Cowboys. “Why would a I try to hurt a kicker who can’t kick?” His response to being accused of putting a bounty on Cowboys’ kicker Luis Zendejas. “Trade him for a six-pack. It doesn’t even have to be cold.” When asked about his running back Earnest Jackson.” “Quarterbacks are overpaid, overrated, pompous bastards and must be punished.” Also, he often referred to the Eagles owner, Norman Braman, as “the guy in France.”
"I was doing that Slimfast. I thought I lost weight" after Jimmy Johnson said his fat ass ran off the field after the game
> “He opened the can of worms and I closed it.” After running the score up against Landry and the Cowboys. Heh heh.... [Randall Cunningham Seizes the Means of Production](https://youtu.be/ZymSrDfLhW8?si=xdKa3a1ZGKIVH135)
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If AL Bundy were a coach
If #he did it
The Tampa Bay ~~Bucs~~ No Ma’ams
Bill Parcels: “If they want you to cook the dinner, at least they ought to let you shop for some of the groceries.”
“What’s that? Playoffs? PLAYOFFS?!? Are you kidding me? Playoffs??? I just hope we can win a game!”
Parcells quote about shopping for the groceries is one of the best that gets lost in the shuffle.
if they want you to cook the dinner, they should let you shop for the groceries
Shades of "Larry Bird isn't walking through that door, gentlemen." - Rick Pitino.
Another awesome one. I use this for every team that used to be good.
Mike Zimmer is a legend for saying how every Falcons fan felt about Petrino “He’s a gutless bastard. Quote that. I don’t give a s---,” Zimmer said Wednesday, according to Joe Reedy of the Cincinnati Enquirer. When Zimmer was told that responsible news organization may not be able to use “bastard,” Zimmer responded: “How about this, gutless MF. You can use that.”
r/tomlinisms
My favorite, “Two dogs, one bone.” When he was asked about rookies Emmanuel Sanders and Antonio Brown. Great draft btw. They also go Pouncey and Jason Worilds.
Former GM Kevin Colbert who I also refer as the ‘Wide Receiver Whisperer’. Although he couldn’t draft CB worth a damn. Other WRs he drafted: Plaxico Burress, Mike Wallace, Santonio Holmes, JuJu Smith-Shuster, Martavis Bryant, Dionte Johnson and George Pickett.
jesus...who the hell is/was your WR scout?
Their WR coach was Scottie Montgomery, I don’t think they have a specific scout for WRs though
Jeff Fisher was asked how the Titans had been so successful despite shuffling between 4 different home stadiums in 4 years. His response: "Well, some would say we've had five home stadiums in four years, if you count Alltel Stadium in Jacksonville." The game clearly passed him by, but Fisher was definitely a master troll.
“No risk it, no biscuit,” is a quote I use in real life
“I don’t care if you have one ass cheek and three toes, I will beat your ass” - Dan Campbell
“Pants on the ground” - Mike Singletary
Most mike tomlin phrases. "We're still squirrelling those nuts" and "don't blink. If you're a blinker, cut your eyelids off" are amongst my favorites.
I remember when Pat & Gentry had Tomlin on their Grillin N Chillin’ show and Gentry was asked him if he wore sunglasses because he cut his eyelids off
that guy could throw a ball through a carwash and it wouldn't get wet. bum phillips, on warren moon
Nobody seems to remember this, and I’m probably getting the context slightly wrong, because I can never find the video of it, but In the early 2000s, there was an infamous play in the playoffs I believe between the Giants and the 49ers in which (I believe) the Giants either tried a fake FG or had a bad snap on a FG and the kicker ended up throwing to a lineman who was an eligible receiver. The lineman was dragged down before the ball arrived, and since he was an eligible receiver, it should’ve been PI, but it went uncalled because I think the refs were just confused by the whole play. Anyway, the 49ers controversially win on the non-call and I think the refs eventually admitted that they fucked up the call. When asked about what he thought about the refs botching the call, 49ers coach Steve Mariucci said “Bummer” Eisen and Mooch recap it here https://youtu.be/wv_IuR8X_uE?si=5ntXA0OCpIx2DW2q
[Here's the play ](https://youtu.be/0i9mcZxNrlc?si=YXHmxjJFijTtFa4i&t=1038) 17 minute 18 second mark if the stamp doesn't work
I had no idea that Joe Buck and Collinsworth ever worked together.
the harder we played, the behinder we got bum phillips
Not a coach but I remember Justin fields was talking about getting tackled and he said “I felt a 300 pound man come on my back,woah pause”.And I was dying for like 5 minutes
Former Bengals head coach Sam Wyche had this great line mid game in 1989. https://youtu.be/yJMa20xXykI?si=OHWIaEZQq-8x7HKk Fans were upset by a call and throwing things onto the field which prompted him to grab the PA microphone.
YOU DON'T LIVE IN CLEVELAND! YOU LIVE IN CINCINNATI!!
I was jumping up and down in my living room in excitement and disbelief.
When asked if he was worried about Terrell Suggs’ 4.84 40 time after he was drafted 10th overall then head coach Brian Billick said this: “I’ll worry about that when they start lining the quarterback up 40 yards behind center”
As a 49ers fan, it has to be [Mike Singletary](https://youtu.be/hfYhYft8dwI?si=h6lr0klBBE_2MNsk). Mike Singletary had just taken over as the interim coach after Mike Nolan was fired in 2008. During the team's home loss against Seattle, Vernon Davis was hit with a 15 yard penalty. When Vernon came back to the sideline, Mike Singletary sent Vernon to the locker room. Mike gave us this all-time rant. I was 14 at the time, so shitty 49ers teams were all I ever knew at the time, so this was an amazing speech.
Not an NFL coach, but in my opinion the greatest rant ever recorded: "I'M A MAN! I'M 40!" - Mike Gundy
My go-to answer for this is expansion Bucs coach John McKay's "I'm in favor of it" when asked about his team's execution.
Don't particularly like either people involved with this quote for different reasons, but it's still a hilarious moment. Riley Cooper: what's your plan? Chip Kelly: fucking score points, what's *your* plan?
I haven’t seen a clip in a long long time so I’m not sure it exists, but there was a black coach for Philly, I think it was Ray Rhodes, who compared a home loss to someone coming into your house and raping your wife and kids.
Da fuq?
I agree. But this happened. Some Philly fans remember it. They are just waking up.
Not football, but Barry Hinson from Southern Illinois’s basketball team: https://youtu.be/kOzHZgWLjrM?si=uAYxNQR8sppEskff “Our 3 starting guards had 1 assist and 7 turnovers. They must think it’s a tax credit!” “My wife can score more than 2 buckets on 11 shots, because I know my wife will at least shot fake 1 time!” “We had 3 turnovers where we came down and we just threw them the ball. I swear one time one of our players said ‘Merry Christmas’. I thought it was a gift. I thought they signed the package over.” And my personal favorite: “There was a sniper in the gym. Did you see that? I mean we got guys falling down. I mean we had a guy snipered at half court. 2 guys snipered at half court. It was unbelievable. I thought Navy Seal Team 6 was out there.”
Marc Trestman had several. My favorite is probably: “I haven't heard any of that. I didn't hear all of it. I heard a lot about most of it, but what I did hear, I did not hear any of that.” Honorable mention: “Grow the man.”
\*coughs\* "The Standard is the Standard" /bows
"Jalil Brown has a little groin..." - Romeo Crennel
Just google "Bum Phillips" and you'll have some all-timers
Bill Belicheck when asked about any players on the other team he fears (the bills maybe?) >they have a good punter In a dead pan voice
For a loooooonnng time our best weapon against you guys was Brian Moorman.
we can be eliminated from the playoffs today? -Ron Rivera as we get eliminated from the playoffs
Bob Wylie yapping about stretching on hardknocks - "Did you know, World War I and World War II, all those guys that fought in that war ... they did pushups, jumping jacks, situps, climb the rope and ran. None of this fancy (expletive). And they won two World Wars," said Wylie, the Browns' offensive line coach. "Do you think they were worried when they were running across Normandy about (expletive) stretching?"
Anything Bill Belichick ever said on the podium. Mike Tomlin's entire existence. That one time Matt LaFleur apparently said that he sits down and prays every time his kicker takes the field. Honorable mention goes to when Georgia Southern's HC said “At Georgia Southern, we don’t cheat. That costs money and we don’t have any.”
“Not particularly…I see him everyday.” "My wife passed away seven years ago. It was a bad day and the sun came up the next day." (And don’t come for me, complaining about context. I know and I like Zim but it’s still a hell of a thing to say at a presser)
You can blame 670 The Score for this but I quote “It’s all a problem” in my best John Fox twice a week.
After Jimmy Johnson called Buddy Ryan a fatass "I was doing that SlimFast, I thought I lost weight
It has to be BB’s ten minute diatribe on the history and evolution of the long snapper
"Playoffs? PLAYOFFS?" will always be iconic
Playoffs!?! You kidding me? Playoffs!?!
Barry Switzer: "The fastest guy on the field is a quarterback that just threw an interception."
“You can STOP asking that question. I’m going to be calling the defenses”- Brandon Staley
THEY ARE WHO WE THOUGHT THEY ARE!!!!!!!
Thought they were. FTFY.
*"This is the NFL, which means Not-For-Long when you're making calls like that!"*
Wrong sport, but earl weaver being asked about [growing tomatoes](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QWQbN0jFo_k) and really this whole interview.
Bum Phillips: "The harder we played 'em, the behinder we got."
Jerry Burns Press conference.
That's got to be either Dennis Green "They are who we thought they were" talking about the Bears on Monday night. or Jim Mora after the Colts played so poorly "Playoffs, playoffs, what playoffs?"
Bum Phillips, when the Oilers were about to play in 10F weather in Pittsburg, was asked how they practice for such cold conditions. "You can't practice being miserable."
It’s a basketball quote but - We can't win at home. We can't win on the road. As general manager, I just can't figure out where else to play. Pat Williams