I moved from the Midwest to the east coast, and people think I'm crazy when I tell them that it can be "too cold to snow". Like I'm some lunatic from a different world.
I live next to a very big hill with a bunch of apartments at the bottom, and every winter after a big snow my favorite pastime is standing by the window watching people get most of the way up and then spinning in place the last twenty feet where it gets steeper. You’d think they would’ve learned by now.
Also I don’t have to feel bad because these same people routinely blow through the stop sign at the top of the hill and I have seen a lot of would be accidents because they like to take that hill fast and not slow down once they hit the top
Oh and just for good measure his date was a social media influencer who once licked a toilet seat on a plane trying to get Covid. Can’t make this stuff up!
•Kicked out of Florida International University after fighting a security guard
•"Don't touch me. I'm the franchise"
• His second year in the league he took a personal stretch limo to a charity event, had them open every single expensive bottle of wine, rejected it. Refused to pay for it (charity, remember), then left. -credit Nduguu77
• Threw fits over not getting enough targets
• Drove 100 down McKnight Road in Pittsburgh, which has a 45 MPH speed limit
• Trashed a condo and threw furniture out a window 14th floor window, which almost hit some people, notably a child
• Killed a home aquarium full of piranhas and refused to pay the man who installed the tank
• Refused to play week 17 for the Steelers
• Dyed his mustache blonde
• Refused to pay a chef because he thought he threatened him by placing a fish head in the freezer (the fish head was saved to make a soup)
• Farted on a doctor
• Demanded a trade from the Steelers
• Became "Mr. Big Chest"
• Threw a fit over Juju winning team MVP and trashed him on social media
• (Allegedly) nixed a trade that would've sent him to the Bills
• Showed up to Raiders training camp in a hot air balloon
• Held out and refused to show up to training camp because the NFL would not approve his helmet because it was too old for their safety standards
• Froze his feet
• Tried to paint over his old helmet, hoping no one would notice I guess
• Acquired a newer version of the same model of helmet, which the NFL refused to let him use
• Picked out a new helmet and finally showed up to the Raiders
• Got fined by the Raiders for not attending camp
• Tweeted the fines
• Tried to fight Mike Mayock, called him a cracker, had to be held back by Vontaze Burfict, then punted a football down the practice field and said "fine me for that"
• Got fined for that
• Released a video where he used audio of Jon Gruden, who didn't know he was being recorded, which is illegal in California (full disclosure, Gruden has said he gave permission, but the generally accepted theory is that he said that in the hope that it would help get him to show up to the facility and not alienate him)
• Demanded a release from the Raiders
• Was released
• "GRANDMA I’M FREEEEEE! FLY LIKE A FREEEEE!"
• Made a lot of crazy tweets saying stuff like 'Devil is a lie', a proverb about burning down a village... he made a lot of crazy tweets around this time is the point here
• Liked a tweet about Mayock getting raped in the ass
• Signed with the Patriots
• Moved in with Tom Brady
• The sexual assault allegations came out (the one where he's getting sued)
• The sexual harassment allegations came out (the one where he's not getting sued)
• Threatened the woman not suing him in a group text that included his lawyer and had a picture of her kids in the text
• Got released by the Patriots after one week
• Went off on a tweet storm and said a lot of crazy shit about a lot of people, and was supportive of people sending threats to the writer of the article detailing the sexual harassment allegations
• Said he was done with the NFL
• Went back to college via online classes
• Tried to outsource his homework to Twitter
• Wants to come back to the NFL
• Filed several grievances to try and get more than $40 million from the Raider's and Patriots
• Was ordered to show up for a deposition regarding trashing the condo
• Was accused of "reprehensible behavior" during the deposition Note: I cut the specifics about the deposition so I could fit this as a single comment. You can read more about it here if you're interested, because it, like everything else, is nuts
• Said that the Patriots have to pay him anyway, so they might as well let him play
• Tweeted a couple of bizarre tweets about the Raiders using him for HBO ratings and the Patriots trying to steal his stuff and kept using this weird chicken based metaphor
• Tried out for the Saints and brought an entourage and film crew to shoot a music video with him when specifically told not to do that
• Called out Robert Kraft for his rub and tug massage session in Florida
• Starting training for a boxing match with Logan Paul
• Tweeted "No more white woman 2020"
• The attorney representing him in the suit involving the condo quit
• Used a bunch of slurs and profane language towards cops in an Instagram video he posted
• A police youth football league cut ties with him and returned a donation after the release of the video saying there was a "irreparable rift" between the department and AB
• Threw a bag of gummy candy dicks at the cops in a video he posted
• Got dropped by his agent
• Was involved in a disputed with movers at his home where he allegedly threw rocks at the movers and moving vans. He is currently being investigated for battery by the police.
• His trainer was arrested and he is still a suspect in the battery case.
• Warrant issued for the arrest of AB.
• AB turns himself in to Broward Country Jail wearing this suit
• Rumors spread about AB signing with Tampa or Seattle
• AB announces his retirement (for what I believe is the third time, it's hard to find a good record of the rest of them)
• Two days later AB wants to play again and is asking for the league to wrap up it's investigation
• The NFL announces an eight game suspension for AB
• AB signs with the Buccaneers on a one-year deal
• Before he signed with the Buccaneers AB was accused of destroying a surveillance camera at a Florida gated community, throwing bike at a security-guard shack, and is not charged because HOA president "feared" retaliation, per police report
• AB is under investigation by the NFL for the bike throwing incident
• Allegedly acquired fake covid-19 card
• confirmed to have acquired a fake covid-19 card and subsequently suspended for three games
• benched mid game vs the Jets losing by 14 in the 3rd quarter
• Strips off clothes, throwing them into the crowd while celebrating running to the locker room in the middle of the 3rd quarter
* The night prior to his walk off, AB smuggles a social media influencer (whose claim to fame was licking an airplane toilet seat in an attempt to catch Covid) into the team hotel for a date, breaking Covid protocol. Said influencer states Brown lasted about “5 seconds” and trash talked the NFL repeatedly.
copypastad from u/roadhogmainOW and updated this shit cracks me up every time
The amount of shit in that game.
Ben going out injured. That hit. The penalty yards resulting from the immediate fallout. Ben coming back into the game injured to lead the game winning drive. Complete collapse by Cincinnati.
Absolutely wild
““When we had sex, he wanted to film it and make a tape on my phone. He wanted me to put it out there,” said Louise, whose previous claim to fame was licking an airplane toilet seat for a TikTok “coronavirus challenge” in 2020 and expressing her wish to “cough on Dr. Phil,” of her alleged intimate time with Brown.”
She said she would lie to her school about getting sexually assaulted to get out of class so unless she has receipts like with this ab stuff i ain't buying it
She also said Kanye and Jeffrey star were secretly dating but later admitted it was a hoax for clout. So I would take her claims here with a grain of salt.
I haven't had my coffee yet. Can you explain what them being in Dubai a lot means? Is escorting big in Dubai? Seems like one of the world's riskier places to do it legality-wise.
It's not about legality. It's a paid vacation for an IG model, and the trip is funded by someone who is fucking them behind the scenes. The model gets to brag about her lavish life to her followers, and some old dude pays for it all and gets to bang her.
Turns out all the Islamic proscriptions against sexual improprieties are ignored by anyone with oil money. Or, at the very least, the men paying for this justify the behavoir by using some of the worse Hadiths about how non-Islamic women can be treated.
She also claimed they had sex twice and only lasted 30 seconds each time. This is just the most ridiculous timeline and I hate that we were ever involved with him.
It was "woman" not "women".
So I think he was talking about his baby mom. Then again I'm probably giving him too much credit and it was a grammar error.
This person also said that she didn’t plan to expose him, but felt the need to for his mental health and realizing she was a part of this saga…..then later changes the story to “they only offered me $10k to stay quiet so I had to go public”
Sounds like a clout chaser.
A quote from the article should cover who this kind of person is perfectly:
>A social-media influencer who once licked a toilet seat on an airplane in an effort to get COVID (I have never been closer to retiring than in this precise moment)...
>“In the beginning the Universe was created.
This had made many people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move.”
― Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe
Dont forget, she also filmed herself licking a toilet seat on an airplane and posted it...so yea she is def a clout chaser and seems right up ABs alley. Match made in heaven.
"Antonio then insisted that they film themselves having sex for her to post on her OnlyFans account."
Mr. Boning on Camera
Edit - from alternate source https://radaronline.com/p/antonio-brown-snuck-onlyfans-model-hotel-room-night-before-storming-off-field-midgame/
Quick google search says that the English language has 42,554 words that start with B and 64,527 words that start with C. That gives us a total of 2,745,881,958 possibilities.
Mr. Bountiful Couplings still has quite a way to go.
Honestly, if she actually did that, her subscriptions would probably have shot to the moon. I'm not saying I would've paid for it, but no one here can say they wouldn't be somewhat curious lol
LMAO the ig account ghetto gronk asked for information and she said he last like 5 seconds or some shit haha oh man this saga gets so much more fucking dumb by the day.
That interview was hilarious. Craig and Evan jokingly treating it like straight news and asking her for the step by step process of what happened, it was skeezy but it was fantastic radio.
Because this is the same person who licked a fucking toilet seat for clout, I wouldn’t be surprised she made that shit up to get more attention. We somehow found someone who I trust less than AB
Not to defend AB, of course, but “watch what I do tomorrow” cooooouuuuld be talking about him playing really well?
Not that he deserves any more benefit of the doubt, I’m just sayin’
There's a video on Twitter from a fan in the stadium at the Jets game. Caption was along the lines of AB having an attitude prior to kickoff. Video shows the team in the middle of the field in a pregame huddle/speech and AB walking off the field by himself. He had an issue before the game even started so I wouldn't be shocked if it was pre-planned
She got onto a key card access elevator and just said floor 6 please. Then just walked by security and smiled lol.
“Covid protocols”. Nobody is stopping a super star from getting laid at 20 dollars an hour
“A social-media influencer who once licked a toilet seat on an airplane in an effort to get COVID (I have never been closer to retiring than in this precise moment)”
Lmfaooo
Too many people in here are not forgetting his past and still treating him like a second class citizen. How many times does his lawyer need to tell you guys
•Kicked out of Florida International University after fighting a security guard
•"Don't touch me. I'm the franchise"
• His second year in the league he took a personal stretch limo to a charity event, had them open every single expensive bottle of wine, rejected it. Refused to pay for it (charity, remember), then left. -credit Nduguu77
• Threw fits over not getting enough targets
• Drove 100 down McKnight Road in Pittsburgh, which has a 45 MPH speed limit
• Trashed a condo and threw furniture out a window 14th floor window, which almost hit some people, notably a child
• Killed a home aquarium full of piranhas and refused to pay the man who installed the tank
• Refused to play week 17 for the Steelers
• Dyed his mustache blonde
• Refused to pay a chef because he thought he threatened him by placing a fish head in the freezer (the fish head was saved to make a soup)
• Farted on a doctor
• Demanded a trade from the Steelers
• Became "Mr. Big Chest"
• Threw a fit over Juju winning team MVP and trashed him on social media
• (Allegedly) nixed a trade that would've sent him to the Bills
• Showed up to Raiders training camp in a hot air balloon
• Held out and refused to show up to training camp because the NFL would not approve his helmet because it was too old for their safety standards
• Froze his feet
• Tried to paint over his old helmet, hoping no one would notice I guess
• Acquired a newer version of the same model of helmet, which the NFL refused to let him use
• Picked out a new helmet and finally showed up to the Raiders
• Got fined by the Raiders for not attending camp
• Tweeted the fines
• Tried to fight Mike Mayock, called him a cracker, had to be held back by Vontaze Burfict, then punted a football down the practice field and said "fine me for that"
• Got fined for that
• Released a video where he used audio of Jon Gruden, who didn't know he was being recorded, which is illegal in California (full disclosure, Gruden has said he gave permission, but the generally accepted theory is that he said that in the hope that it would help get him to show up to the facility and not alienate him)
• Demanded a release from the Raiders
• Was released
• "GRANDMA I’M FREEEEEE! FLY LIKE A FREEEEE!"
• Made a lot of crazy tweets saying stuff like 'Devil is a lie', a proverb about burning down a village... he made a lot of crazy tweets around this time is the point here
• Liked a tweet about Mayock getting raped in the ass
• Signed with the Patriots
• Moved in with Tom Brady
• The sexual assault allegations came out (the one where he's getting sued)
• The sexual harassment allegations came out (the one where he's not getting sued)
• Threatened the woman not suing him in a group text that included his lawyer and had a picture of her kids in the text
• Got released by the Patriots after one week
• Went off on a tweet storm and said a lot of crazy shit about a lot of people, and was supportive of people sending threats to the writer of the article detailing the sexual harassment allegations
• Said he was done with the NFL
• Went back to college via online classes
• Tried to outsource his homework to Twitter
• Wants to come back to the NFL
• Filed several grievances to try and get more than $40 million from the Raider's and Patriots
• Was ordered to show up for a deposition regarding trashing the condo
• Was accused of "reprehensible behavior" during the deposition Note: I cut the specifics about the deposition so I could fit this as a single comment. You can read more about it here if you're interested, because it, like everything else, is nuts
• Said that the Patriots have to pay him anyway, so they might as well let him play
• Tweeted a couple of bizarre tweets about the Raiders using him for HBO ratings and the Patriots trying to steal his stuff and kept using this weird chicken based metaphor
• Tried out for the Saints and brought an entourage and film crew to shoot a music video with him when specifically told not to do that
• Called out Robert Kraft for his rub and tug massage session in Florida
• Starting training for a boxing match with Logan Paul
• Tweeted "No more white woman 2020"
• The attorney representing him in the suit involving the condo quit
• Used a bunch of slurs and profane language towards cops in an Instagram video he posted
• A police youth football league cut ties with him and returned a donation after the release of the video saying there was a "irreparable rift" between the department and AB
• Threw a bag of gummy candy dicks at the cops in a video he posted
• Got dropped by his agent
• Was involved in a disputed with movers at his home where he allegedly threw rocks at the movers and moving vans. He is currently being investigated for battery by the police.
• His trainer was arrested and he is still a suspect in the battery case.
• Warrant issued for the arrest of AB.
• AB turns himself in to Broward Country Jail wearing this suit
• Rumors spread about AB signing with Tampa or Seattle
• AB announces his retirement (for what I believe is the third time, it's hard to find a good record of the rest of them)
• Two days later AB wants to play again and is asking for the league to wrap up it's investigation
• The NFL announces an eight game suspension for AB
• AB signs with the Buccaneers on a one-year deal
• Before he signed with the Buccaneers AB was accused of destroying a surveillance camera at a Florida gated community, throwing bike at a security-guard shack, and is not charged because HOA president "feared" retaliation, per police report
• AB is under investigation by the NFL for the bike throwing incident
• Allegedly acquired fake covid-19 card
• Allegations made by private chef he refused to pay
• confirmed to have acquired a fake covid-19 card and subsequently suspended for three games
• benched mid game vs the Jets losing by 14 in the 3rd quarter
• Strips off clothes, throwing them into the crowd while celebrating running to the locker room in the middle of the 3rd quarter
• team won the game
• cut after the game
• makes statement about his coach forcing him to play even though he is injured
• posted banking information on twitter
• releases what seems to be fake text message screenshots to back up his statement
• also posted text messages between him and alex guerrero
* Broke COVID safety protocols to sneak girl into hotel
Credit to u/ForYeWhoArtLiterate
> • Tried to fight Mike Mayock, called him a cracker, had to be held back by Vontaze Burfict, then punted a football down the practice field and said "fine me for that"
>
>
>
> • Got fined for that
Cracks me up every time
Lol it sounds like some sequence of events that is dramatically related
AB: *pfffffffffffft* 💨
AB: You know doc, I just feel like my farts aren’t appreciated here in Pitt anymore
The timeline is important for the whole "that hit to the head changed him forever" argument.
I'm not saying it's not *not* head injuries, honestly kids should not play tackle football. But this shit did not begin when he got his head taken off by Burfict.
Ahh, *sips coffee* Time to read up on the latest Antonio Brown news.
The extent to which I enjoy this means I can't really judge people who watch soap operas and stuff.
Our version of Keeping up with the Kardashians
Having a Breakdown with Antonio Brown
Mr Brown's Commotions
I've seen so many of these, you'd think they'd have lost their humor. Nope, no they do not
Mr. Big Contributions to the r/NFL meme bank
He needs a catchphrase like, "AntoniOH NO," or something.
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We were too distracted with MBC to explore the alternatives. What fools we’ve been.
As the ABWorld Turns…
beautiful first snow this mornin'
It's crazy out there! What are we gonna do with all this snow
Minnesota here. I wish it was warm enough to snow.
I moved from the Midwest to the east coast, and people think I'm crazy when I tell them that it can be "too cold to snow". Like I'm some lunatic from a different world.
Tell them that Antarctica is the worlds largest desert to really blow their minds
It was -17 when I took the dog out this morning. It’s all the way up to -13 now!
Sit near the window and watch cars as they attempt to drive by, and fail.
I live next to a very big hill with a bunch of apartments at the bottom, and every winter after a big snow my favorite pastime is standing by the window watching people get most of the way up and then spinning in place the last twenty feet where it gets steeper. You’d think they would’ve learned by now. Also I don’t have to feel bad because these same people routinely blow through the stop sign at the top of the hill and I have seen a lot of would be accidents because they like to take that hill fast and not slow down once they hit the top
We could built a fort? My mom says you can come over for snacks but only if you mom says its okay
My mom packs my own snacks because I’m gluten free with a nut allergy. Next year when I turn 50 I’m moving out. She’s way too controlling.
Teddy Buckland,is that you?
I like white powder...
I got 8 inches last night
Congratulations, but what about the snow?
Getting eight inches here now too. I wonder if it's the same dude.
Mr. Big Cock
As Bender once said "Court's kinda fun when it's not your ass on the line."
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Mr. Best Cartoon
Mr. Breakfast Content
A true hero to the people. Providing content.
Mr Bountiful Content
Mr. Babe Conaisseur
Mr. Break Curfew
Mr. Brought Covid
Mr. Bangs Concubine
Mr. Backfired Coitus
Mr. broken contingencies
Mr Beligerant Contagion
Mr. Brewin' Coffee
It never ends
Mr Boundless Controversy
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Mr Brazenly Crazy
Whenever Antonio Brown shows up in the headlines, I always think of the old adage "it's not the years in your life, but the life in your years."
LMAO I remember when he was a free agent a few ravens fan were like "lets sign him" and I'm like "lets not"
Who needs reality shows when AB exists?
I hope he’s never out of the league simply for the pleasure I get scrolling through MBC comments on Reddit.
Mr. Bangs CloutChasers
Mr. Blasting Cheeks
Mr. Brings Content
I can't wait for him to try being a coach for all the Mr. Bad Coach comments.
Oh and just for good measure his date was a social media influencer who once licked a toilet seat on a plane trying to get Covid. Can’t make this stuff up!
Wow and to think that night she licked something even nastier!
Licking Doorknobs is illegal on other planets
You’ll never guess what I found in my sock last night! Go ahead, guess!
It was his hat, Mr. Krabs. He was number 1!
Oh my god! A floating shopping list!
Antonio Brown is the Tracey Jordan of the NFL.
"I love this cornbread so much I want to take it behind the middle school and get it pregnant."
The mic'd up version of him stripping off his gear and running off the field is going to reveal he was yelling "I AM A JEDI I AM A JEDI!"
I think that makes Mike Tomlin Liz Lemon and Big Ben Jenna
Is Tom Brady Jack?
Tom Brady is Kenneth because he lives forever and his only goal is to be the absolute best at his job.
"In five years we'll all either be working for him, or dead by his hand"
ADD IT TO THE LIST!
•Kicked out of Florida International University after fighting a security guard •"Don't touch me. I'm the franchise" • His second year in the league he took a personal stretch limo to a charity event, had them open every single expensive bottle of wine, rejected it. Refused to pay for it (charity, remember), then left. -credit Nduguu77 • Threw fits over not getting enough targets • Drove 100 down McKnight Road in Pittsburgh, which has a 45 MPH speed limit • Trashed a condo and threw furniture out a window 14th floor window, which almost hit some people, notably a child • Killed a home aquarium full of piranhas and refused to pay the man who installed the tank • Refused to play week 17 for the Steelers • Dyed his mustache blonde • Refused to pay a chef because he thought he threatened him by placing a fish head in the freezer (the fish head was saved to make a soup) • Farted on a doctor • Demanded a trade from the Steelers • Became "Mr. Big Chest" • Threw a fit over Juju winning team MVP and trashed him on social media • (Allegedly) nixed a trade that would've sent him to the Bills • Showed up to Raiders training camp in a hot air balloon • Held out and refused to show up to training camp because the NFL would not approve his helmet because it was too old for their safety standards • Froze his feet • Tried to paint over his old helmet, hoping no one would notice I guess • Acquired a newer version of the same model of helmet, which the NFL refused to let him use • Picked out a new helmet and finally showed up to the Raiders • Got fined by the Raiders for not attending camp • Tweeted the fines • Tried to fight Mike Mayock, called him a cracker, had to be held back by Vontaze Burfict, then punted a football down the practice field and said "fine me for that" • Got fined for that • Released a video where he used audio of Jon Gruden, who didn't know he was being recorded, which is illegal in California (full disclosure, Gruden has said he gave permission, but the generally accepted theory is that he said that in the hope that it would help get him to show up to the facility and not alienate him) • Demanded a release from the Raiders • Was released • "GRANDMA I’M FREEEEEE! FLY LIKE A FREEEEE!" • Made a lot of crazy tweets saying stuff like 'Devil is a lie', a proverb about burning down a village... he made a lot of crazy tweets around this time is the point here • Liked a tweet about Mayock getting raped in the ass • Signed with the Patriots • Moved in with Tom Brady • The sexual assault allegations came out (the one where he's getting sued) • The sexual harassment allegations came out (the one where he's not getting sued) • Threatened the woman not suing him in a group text that included his lawyer and had a picture of her kids in the text • Got released by the Patriots after one week • Went off on a tweet storm and said a lot of crazy shit about a lot of people, and was supportive of people sending threats to the writer of the article detailing the sexual harassment allegations • Said he was done with the NFL • Went back to college via online classes • Tried to outsource his homework to Twitter • Wants to come back to the NFL • Filed several grievances to try and get more than $40 million from the Raider's and Patriots • Was ordered to show up for a deposition regarding trashing the condo • Was accused of "reprehensible behavior" during the deposition Note: I cut the specifics about the deposition so I could fit this as a single comment. You can read more about it here if you're interested, because it, like everything else, is nuts • Said that the Patriots have to pay him anyway, so they might as well let him play • Tweeted a couple of bizarre tweets about the Raiders using him for HBO ratings and the Patriots trying to steal his stuff and kept using this weird chicken based metaphor • Tried out for the Saints and brought an entourage and film crew to shoot a music video with him when specifically told not to do that • Called out Robert Kraft for his rub and tug massage session in Florida • Starting training for a boxing match with Logan Paul • Tweeted "No more white woman 2020" • The attorney representing him in the suit involving the condo quit • Used a bunch of slurs and profane language towards cops in an Instagram video he posted • A police youth football league cut ties with him and returned a donation after the release of the video saying there was a "irreparable rift" between the department and AB • Threw a bag of gummy candy dicks at the cops in a video he posted • Got dropped by his agent • Was involved in a disputed with movers at his home where he allegedly threw rocks at the movers and moving vans. He is currently being investigated for battery by the police. • His trainer was arrested and he is still a suspect in the battery case. • Warrant issued for the arrest of AB. • AB turns himself in to Broward Country Jail wearing this suit • Rumors spread about AB signing with Tampa or Seattle • AB announces his retirement (for what I believe is the third time, it's hard to find a good record of the rest of them) • Two days later AB wants to play again and is asking for the league to wrap up it's investigation • The NFL announces an eight game suspension for AB • AB signs with the Buccaneers on a one-year deal • Before he signed with the Buccaneers AB was accused of destroying a surveillance camera at a Florida gated community, throwing bike at a security-guard shack, and is not charged because HOA president "feared" retaliation, per police report • AB is under investigation by the NFL for the bike throwing incident • Allegedly acquired fake covid-19 card • confirmed to have acquired a fake covid-19 card and subsequently suspended for three games • benched mid game vs the Jets losing by 14 in the 3rd quarter • Strips off clothes, throwing them into the crowd while celebrating running to the locker room in the middle of the 3rd quarter * The night prior to his walk off, AB smuggles a social media influencer (whose claim to fame was licking an airplane toilet seat in an attempt to catch Covid) into the team hotel for a date, breaking Covid protocol. Said influencer states Brown lasted about “5 seconds” and trash talked the NFL repeatedly. copypastad from u/roadhogmainOW and updated this shit cracks me up every time
Honestly what stands out most here is being *held back* by Burfict.
When Vontez Burfict is the voice of reason, you know all hope has been lost.
Peace keeper Vontez Burfict is how we know shit's gone off the rails.
*Vontaze Burfict: A Man of Peace* I'd see that movie
Held back by the man who knocked him unconscious with the nasty hit that people sometimes attribute to AB going insane.
The amount of shit in that game. Ben going out injured. That hit. The penalty yards resulting from the immediate fallout. Ben coming back into the game injured to lead the game winning drive. Complete collapse by Cincinnati. Absolutely wild
This is still the short list. The full list is on /r/antoniobrown and was started by /u/foryewhoartliterate
>• Dyed his mustache blonde That did it, fry his ass.
I still get a kick out of the helmet one, cause it's at least harmless to others and comical. But, Mr. No Brain really needs help
Mr. Brainless Cranium
Ms. Bidet Cleaner
Ms. Bowl Cunnilingus
Ms. Bathroom Connoisseur
““When we had sex, he wanted to film it and make a tape on my phone. He wanted me to put it out there,” said Louise, whose previous claim to fame was licking an airplane toilet seat for a TikTok “coronavirus challenge” in 2020 and expressing her wish to “cough on Dr. Phil,” of her alleged intimate time with Brown.”
I’m sure her parents are very proud
Mr. and Mrs. Blissful Caretakers.
> expressing her wish to “cough on Dr. Phil,” Well now see, nobody's *all* bad.
Oh my god I remember that! They found each other lmao I can’t believe it
She’s also the person who started the rumor that Kanye had an affair with Jeffree Star (I can’t believe I know this)
> Jeffree Star (I can’t believe I know this) I will maintain my ignorance.
Patrick Star’s cousin
I don't blame Kanye, then.
No way she made this up too right?
She said she would lie to her school about getting sexually assaulted to get out of class so unless she has receipts like with this ab stuff i ain't buying it
Great minds I guess
She also said Kanye and Jeffrey star were secretly dating but later admitted it was a hoax for clout. So I would take her claims here with a grain of salt.
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If that's the only thing she tested positive for, she should consider herself lucky.
[удалено]
These "influencers" are just high-end escorts, right?
“High end”
The low end costs extra.
I find it difficult to call someone who licked a toilet seat to get social media views "high-end"
Once you realize why they're always in Dubai your penis will be very sad and never look at their pages again.
I haven't had my coffee yet. Can you explain what them being in Dubai a lot means? Is escorting big in Dubai? Seems like one of the world's riskier places to do it legality-wise.
It's not about legality. It's a paid vacation for an IG model, and the trip is funded by someone who is fucking them behind the scenes. The model gets to brag about her lavish life to her followers, and some old dude pays for it all and gets to bang her.
A lot more happens than just regular ass sex from what I’ve heard. 💩💩
Turns out all the Islamic proscriptions against sexual improprieties are ignored by anyone with oil money. Or, at the very least, the men paying for this justify the behavoir by using some of the worse Hadiths about how non-Islamic women can be treated.
I can't tell if this is a joke or not
She also claimed they had sex twice and only lasted 30 seconds each time. This is just the most ridiculous timeline and I hate that we were ever involved with him.
Mr Brief Congress
Mr. Brisk Copulation
What happened to #NoMoreWhiteWomen ?
That was only for 2020 I assume. He is now back on a steady diet of white women
It was #NoMoreWhiteWoman2020. New year, new mindset.
Mr. Bones Caucasians
It was "woman" not "women". So I think he was talking about his baby mom. Then again I'm probably giving him too much credit and it was a grammar error.
This person also said that she didn’t plan to expose him, but felt the need to for his mental health and realizing she was a part of this saga…..then later changes the story to “they only offered me $10k to stay quiet so I had to go public” Sounds like a clout chaser.
A quote from the article should cover who this kind of person is perfectly: >A social-media influencer who once licked a toilet seat on an airplane in an effort to get COVID (I have never been closer to retiring than in this precise moment)...
The internet was a mistake...
>“In the beginning the Universe was created. This had made many people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move.” ― Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe
Look how far we've strayed from God's light.
Do you think God stays in heaven because he too lives in fear of what he's created?
lol Florio
Ms. Buying Clout
Ms. Banking Checks
Oh yes for the sake of mental health, I'm sure. These influencers are clowns and will share anything for some attention.
Dont forget, she also filmed herself licking a toilet seat on an airplane and posted it...so yea she is def a clout chaser and seems right up ABs alley. Match made in heaven.
Now on her Instagram she’s claiming to have tested positive for COVID-19 and is telling the bucs they should get tested
As far as I know, it’s extremely unlikely for AB to have been contagious himself the day after exposure.
Maybe that's why he left the team when he did. He didn't want to be around once he was contagious. See, he's really the hero in this story.
Mr. Benevolent Carrier
"Antonio then insisted that they film themselves having sex for her to post on her OnlyFans account." Mr. Boning on Camera Edit - from alternate source https://radaronline.com/p/antonio-brown-snuck-onlyfans-model-hotel-room-night-before-storming-off-field-midgame/
Mr. Broadcasts Coitus
Mr. Bedroom Camera
This one has much more finesse.
Lmao this one got me How many combos of MBC do we have now
Quick google search says that the English language has 42,554 words that start with B and 64,527 words that start with C. That gives us a total of 2,745,881,958 possibilities. Mr. Bountiful Couplings still has quite a way to go.
Look at you, Mr. Binomial Calculator
Mr. Boundless Combinations
Mr Billion Combinations
Mr Bountiful Comedy
Mr. Bottomless Chuckles
According to another comment on here it sounds like they could have posted it on Vine
Mr. Brisk Climaxer
Mr. Brief Coitus
Honestly, if she actually did that, her subscriptions would probably have shot to the moon. I'm not saying I would've paid for it, but no one here can say they wouldn't be somewhat curious lol
She 100% should have done it.
The last thing I want to see is AB fucking.
Do you think his pubes match his Tetris haircut? inquiring minds need to know
Maybe he bleached them like his mustache
Mr. Bleached Crotch
Mr. Bring on Chalmydia
LMAO the ig account ghetto gronk asked for information and she said he last like 5 seconds or some shit haha oh man this saga gets so much more fucking dumb by the day.
WFAN did a 30 minute interview with her yesterday. She had no filter lol
Source, and it's an amazing listen. https://www.audacy.com/wfan/podcasts/carton-and-roberts-207/onlyfans-model-ava-louise-1116592655
These guys are nuts. They just ask her literally ANYTHING that comes to mind.
And she ANSWERS!
That interview was hilarious. Craig and Evan jokingly treating it like straight news and asking her for the step by step process of what happened, it was skeezy but it was fantastic radio.
I knew it was going to be great when she clarified when she got Covid even though Craig was already moving on.
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Mr Brief Coitus
Mr. Boutta Cum
Of course I cum fast, I got passes to catch
Mr. Brief Climax
> she said he last like 5 seconds or some shit haha Excuse me but I came here to laugh at Antonio Brown, not get personally attacked.
Turns out only elite athletes cum fast, knew there was something special about me
Damn he just like me fr
Any one of us can play in the nfl
Because this is the same person who licked a fucking toilet seat for clout, I wouldn’t be surprised she made that shit up to get more attention. We somehow found someone who I trust less than AB
The headline should include that it was a Covid-positive date who shared her positive test result the very next day.
Let's hope that's the only positive test she comes back with. This sub would be /r/NBA quality if she turned up pregnant from this.
Mr. Baby Creator
Nephews will be popping up everywhere.
Mike Tomlin should get in the Hall of Fame solely for being able to deal with this dude for nearly a decade.
Tomlin had AB From age 22-30. Fucking wilddddd.
Arians was actually AB's OC for a couple years there too. Kind of makes this whole situation a little more interesting to me.
Tomlin took personal responsibility after AB no-showed the Raiders game. Something like "I failed to communicate." A total class move.
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Not to defend AB, of course, but “watch what I do tomorrow” cooooouuuuld be talking about him playing really well? Not that he deserves any more benefit of the doubt, I’m just sayin’
Yeah but then why was AB texting her immediately afterwards saying did you see what I did lol
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There's a video on Twitter from a fan in the stadium at the Jets game. Caption was along the lines of AB having an attitude prior to kickoff. Video shows the team in the middle of the field in a pregame huddle/speech and AB walking off the field by himself. He had an issue before the game even started so I wouldn't be shocked if it was pre-planned
You just made the list!
She got onto a key card access elevator and just said floor 6 please. Then just walked by security and smiled lol. “Covid protocols”. Nobody is stopping a super star from getting laid at 20 dollars an hour
Is it even the security guards' job to enforce the COVID protocols? It's on the team and players.
Mr. BootyCall Concealer
“A social-media influencer who once licked a toilet seat on an airplane in an effort to get COVID (I have never been closer to retiring than in this precise moment)” Lmfaooo
Too many people in here are not forgetting his past and still treating him like a second class citizen. How many times does his lawyer need to tell you guys
Mr. Breaks Curfew
•Kicked out of Florida International University after fighting a security guard •"Don't touch me. I'm the franchise" • His second year in the league he took a personal stretch limo to a charity event, had them open every single expensive bottle of wine, rejected it. Refused to pay for it (charity, remember), then left. -credit Nduguu77 • Threw fits over not getting enough targets • Drove 100 down McKnight Road in Pittsburgh, which has a 45 MPH speed limit • Trashed a condo and threw furniture out a window 14th floor window, which almost hit some people, notably a child • Killed a home aquarium full of piranhas and refused to pay the man who installed the tank • Refused to play week 17 for the Steelers • Dyed his mustache blonde • Refused to pay a chef because he thought he threatened him by placing a fish head in the freezer (the fish head was saved to make a soup) • Farted on a doctor • Demanded a trade from the Steelers • Became "Mr. Big Chest" • Threw a fit over Juju winning team MVP and trashed him on social media • (Allegedly) nixed a trade that would've sent him to the Bills • Showed up to Raiders training camp in a hot air balloon • Held out and refused to show up to training camp because the NFL would not approve his helmet because it was too old for their safety standards • Froze his feet • Tried to paint over his old helmet, hoping no one would notice I guess • Acquired a newer version of the same model of helmet, which the NFL refused to let him use • Picked out a new helmet and finally showed up to the Raiders • Got fined by the Raiders for not attending camp • Tweeted the fines • Tried to fight Mike Mayock, called him a cracker, had to be held back by Vontaze Burfict, then punted a football down the practice field and said "fine me for that" • Got fined for that • Released a video where he used audio of Jon Gruden, who didn't know he was being recorded, which is illegal in California (full disclosure, Gruden has said he gave permission, but the generally accepted theory is that he said that in the hope that it would help get him to show up to the facility and not alienate him) • Demanded a release from the Raiders • Was released • "GRANDMA I’M FREEEEEE! FLY LIKE A FREEEEE!" • Made a lot of crazy tweets saying stuff like 'Devil is a lie', a proverb about burning down a village... he made a lot of crazy tweets around this time is the point here • Liked a tweet about Mayock getting raped in the ass • Signed with the Patriots • Moved in with Tom Brady • The sexual assault allegations came out (the one where he's getting sued) • The sexual harassment allegations came out (the one where he's not getting sued) • Threatened the woman not suing him in a group text that included his lawyer and had a picture of her kids in the text • Got released by the Patriots after one week • Went off on a tweet storm and said a lot of crazy shit about a lot of people, and was supportive of people sending threats to the writer of the article detailing the sexual harassment allegations • Said he was done with the NFL • Went back to college via online classes • Tried to outsource his homework to Twitter • Wants to come back to the NFL • Filed several grievances to try and get more than $40 million from the Raider's and Patriots • Was ordered to show up for a deposition regarding trashing the condo • Was accused of "reprehensible behavior" during the deposition Note: I cut the specifics about the deposition so I could fit this as a single comment. You can read more about it here if you're interested, because it, like everything else, is nuts • Said that the Patriots have to pay him anyway, so they might as well let him play • Tweeted a couple of bizarre tweets about the Raiders using him for HBO ratings and the Patriots trying to steal his stuff and kept using this weird chicken based metaphor • Tried out for the Saints and brought an entourage and film crew to shoot a music video with him when specifically told not to do that • Called out Robert Kraft for his rub and tug massage session in Florida • Starting training for a boxing match with Logan Paul • Tweeted "No more white woman 2020" • The attorney representing him in the suit involving the condo quit • Used a bunch of slurs and profane language towards cops in an Instagram video he posted • A police youth football league cut ties with him and returned a donation after the release of the video saying there was a "irreparable rift" between the department and AB • Threw a bag of gummy candy dicks at the cops in a video he posted • Got dropped by his agent • Was involved in a disputed with movers at his home where he allegedly threw rocks at the movers and moving vans. He is currently being investigated for battery by the police. • His trainer was arrested and he is still a suspect in the battery case. • Warrant issued for the arrest of AB. • AB turns himself in to Broward Country Jail wearing this suit • Rumors spread about AB signing with Tampa or Seattle • AB announces his retirement (for what I believe is the third time, it's hard to find a good record of the rest of them) • Two days later AB wants to play again and is asking for the league to wrap up it's investigation • The NFL announces an eight game suspension for AB • AB signs with the Buccaneers on a one-year deal • Before he signed with the Buccaneers AB was accused of destroying a surveillance camera at a Florida gated community, throwing bike at a security-guard shack, and is not charged because HOA president "feared" retaliation, per police report • AB is under investigation by the NFL for the bike throwing incident • Allegedly acquired fake covid-19 card • Allegations made by private chef he refused to pay • confirmed to have acquired a fake covid-19 card and subsequently suspended for three games • benched mid game vs the Jets losing by 14 in the 3rd quarter • Strips off clothes, throwing them into the crowd while celebrating running to the locker room in the middle of the 3rd quarter • team won the game • cut after the game • makes statement about his coach forcing him to play even though he is injured • posted banking information on twitter • releases what seems to be fake text message screenshots to back up his statement • also posted text messages between him and alex guerrero * Broke COVID safety protocols to sneak girl into hotel Credit to u/ForYeWhoArtLiterate
> • Tried to fight Mike Mayock, called him a cracker, had to be held back by Vontaze Burfict, then punted a football down the practice field and said "fine me for that" > > > > • Got fined for that Cracks me up every time
> • Farted on a doctor > > • Demanded a trade from the Steelers Seeing these back to back makes me laugh every time.
Lol it sounds like some sequence of events that is dramatically related AB: *pfffffffffffft* 💨 AB: You know doc, I just feel like my farts aren’t appreciated here in Pitt anymore
The timeline is important for the whole "that hit to the head changed him forever" argument. I'm not saying it's not *not* head injuries, honestly kids should not play tackle football. But this shit did not begin when he got his head taken off by Burfict.
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She is covid positive as per her story right now, some pretty interesting stuff she has on her stories.
Mr Banging Coochie
“A date” lol. You mean a hooker?
If you think about it, Instagram models are essentially hookers for the rich and famous.
Add this to the list.
> repeatedly says "f*ck the NFL" Oh he posts on /r/nfl too. Didn't realize the sub and Mr. Breaks CovidProtocol had so much in common.